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Girlfriend kissed a girl

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I started hooking up with a girl 2 weeks ago.

Everything seemed healthier than many of my past relationships to start, but one week into it, we were at a party and she started making out with another girl right in front of me. They even went into another room to makeout, and I got up and left the party altogether. She was also leaning up against some other guy's legs while she was sitting, and patting his knee when she laughed. I felt like throwing up.

We hadn't applied any labels to what we were doing at the time, though, and we hadn't even slept together yet.

The next day I told her I needed to be exclusive if we were going to do anything, and she agreed. She apologized for making me feel uncomfortable and confessed she had feelings for me and also wanted to be exclusive.

I still can't stop thinking about it, and my pride feels a little shattered. We both caught some feelings, but I don't know if I should just walk away right now, or give her a chance.

We are in a tight-knit study program that means I have to see her / her friends for 4 more weeks, so a breakup would be rough.

What would you wise anons do?
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>>18147830
Eh, stop being a teenager about it.
If she already agreed to being exclusive with you after two weeks (which to me seems laughable to me, but I can dig it I guess,) imagine where you'll be in another two weeks. Still butthurt? Okay, how about two months? Still can't cope?

Numbers and girls kissing and legs leaning is just cute little things that happen. Accept and let it go. They got nothing to do with what you're in for, or who you are as a person. Injoy your new girlfriend, and try staying in the moment instead of obsessing over your past insecurities.
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it sounds like she just wanted a fuck buddy. from my past experiences, she sounds like the untrustworthy type so keep that in mind.
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>>18147909
This

I would never do that if I was at a party with someone that I saw even the slightest hint a serious relationship in the future with
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>>18147915
>>18147909
TWO WEEKS
>>
>didn't have exclusive talk
>gets butthurt when she's not exclusive

this one is your fault
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>>18147909
>>18147915
OP here.

So what do I do right now?

1) Tell her it's over right now, spend 4 weeks awkward as fuck
2) hang in for 4 weeks, dump her when I leave, using it is a natural parting of ways
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>>18147918
And?

I know after the first hour of meeting someone that if they are friend fuck or relationship material. 2 weeks of talking and I'm gonna go make out with someone else in front of them? Definitely a fuck buddy
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>>18147931
>I know
>relationship
>2 weeks
>study-program
>awkward
>4 weeks
>dump her when I leave

You got a lot of being an adult to look forward to, son
>>
She was testing your limits. She's not to blame for anything, since the two of you weren't dating or anything. But that's definitly not a person who I'd be looking forward to be exclusive with. Not the kind of behavior she should be having if she was romantically interested in you.
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>>18147830
Op,
She is a classic slut, go and fuck her and enjoy it and then dump her ass after 4 weeks.
You're just feeling normal man jealousy, best way to remove that feeling is by using her for sex, maybe try a threesome with the other girl.

Do it pussy
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>>18147927
Breh, going to a party with someone you're hooking up with and then hooking up and flirting with others in front of them is tacky as hell, whether or not you're into that type of thing. She disrespected the fuck out of him.
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>>18147830
>Girl makes out with another girl

>This intimidates you and you leave the party instead of following them and joining in

I mean really,it was just another girl. The only message that sort of shit sends to her is that you can't stand up to women so you're completely helpless when it comes to real threats like other men and that's not desirable.

Besides if you're gonna think she's yours then ACT like she's yours. But you-fucking-know if she is just a hook up you shouldn't be getting so asshurt. She's just following her sense of fun and did not ever commit. You should've been doing the same. Don't get attatched to women. If they're not there for you,you're not there for them.
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>>18147989
Pretty much this

I'm also missing the part where OP explains his cognitive dissonanse

>>18147830
>I don't know if I should just walk away right now, or give her a chance
>a chance

>>18147930
>2) hang in for 4 weeks, dump her when I leave, using it is a natural parting of ways
>when I leave

He doesn't seem overly committed, but maybe that's just my oldfag eyes pulling tricks
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>>18148024
You're saying that I'm being retarded by expecting her to be rock-solid committed, when I'm not?

That's a fair critique.

So I should either give her a chance and stop letting my mind think in such absolute terms, or just let go completely?

Which would you suggest I do?
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People reading OP and saying
>you didn't have the EXCLUSIVITY TALK
>lol just two weeks
Are looking at this the wrong way. The question here isn't whether she did something wrong but instead whether OP should continue being with this girl.

Put yourself in the girl's shoes. If you had feelings for somebody and were interested in dating them, would you make out and flirt with other people in front of your SO's face?

She's either not interested in OP or just retarded. Either way, not dating material.
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>>18147930
sheeiiiit im lonely so I would take the chance and keep her for a bit, but its up to you on what to do my friend
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>>18147940
Nice greentext, grandpa.
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>>18148085
>would you make out and flirt with other people in front of your SO's face?
>SO

OP wasn't a SO at the time he was just a hook up so this is a shitty question. As far as the girl was concerned she probably thought he didn't have the balls to go any further as he wasn't taking control of her and decided to not minimize her own enjoyment for some guy who couldn't take charge.
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>>18148106
Aka she didn't have feels for OP.
My point stands
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>>18148120
That's just shit logic. If she didn't have feels she wouldn't apologize for acting like that and agree to be exclusive. She thought he wasn't interested in her and she was moving on. It's unknown what moves OP made in those 2 weeks of hooking up with her but they were certainly not strong enough.
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>>18148134
>interested in dating someone
>make up with other people in front of then
Yeah, no

As I said she's either not interested or just retarded. Any way, not dating material.
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>>18147830
>We both caught some feelings
>both
anon, ive got some bad news for you
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>>18148080
Me personally? The girl I've been dating for the last four months fool around with her girl friends all the time, and she expresses very little concern about me wanting to fuck other women, if I feel like it. She's met my parents on several occasions, and I'm going to see hers this weekend. We've spent 9 out of ten nights together since new years, but I don't intend on ever being exclusive with any woman ever again. Then again, I'm in the prime of my life, and not a twenty-something clinging to the idea of life-long monogamy anymore, so I'm not the best cat to ask.

If those where my only options, taking into consideration than you might not see this person again after the end of April, I'd go for fuck knows. I can't into you predicament.

But stop thinking in absolute terms sounds nice. Letting go also sounds nice. Can't you just have a casual fling, and see where it goes from there?

>>18148085
OP already made it clear that he wasn't interested in having her make out with other people. That's not really the issue.

The fact that OP still makes an issue out of something that's already resolved, hints towards HER being better off without this. But in terms of having a good time with someone, even though it might not last... Who gives a fuck what "people" consider girlfriend material, you wither enjoy your time with someone, or you don't.

>>18148087
Thanks for the reminder. My dementia already forgot that I outed myself out on purpose.

Sincerely, elderly anon
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>>18148146
Nobody wants your advice you perfidious oldfuck. How about you keep to your disgusting equals and restrain from fucking up new generstions.
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>>18147830

>I started hooking up with a girl 2 weeks ago.

Ok. So you were casually hooking up with this girl and had never had a conversation with her about being exclusive. She did nothing wrong and it was absolutely your fault for not being clearer with her about what you wanted. You failed to set up any boundaries in your relationship so therefore you don't really get any logical justification for being upset that those boundaries were crossed.

Your pride got shattered because you fucked up. Either accept it or move on but just know that this is 100% your own fault. Use this as a valuable lesson for how you should approach new relationships in the future.

>>18148176

>..d..d...degenerate!!!
>>
>>18148176
I've been on /adv for about 16 months now, and I can tell you, your generation is fucked up good and well, even without my disgusting freedom messing anything up significantly further

I used to be like you guys, and it got me stressed out and depressed over nothing, for most of my twenties. Also, OP specifically asked for my advice in >>18148080
Keep calling me old, boy

>>18148203 knows what's up
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>>18147830

>hooked up for 2 weeks
>feel like vomiting over her

Fuck off faggot
>>
>having to state that you're "exclusive", otherwise they go and fuck everyone
>"hooking up"
>randomly making out with people

I don't like this.
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>>18148255
If only there was a way to reverse-age or join a religion
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>>18148231
>>18148203
Still missing the problem. It doesn't matter if she did wrong or not and whether op fucked up or not. The fact that she makes up with others in front of the guy she supposedly likes is enough. Either she is retarded (can't understand that other people, like OP, might not like that and thus doing it is against her best interest) or not interested enough on him (knows he could potentially not like it and thus be against her interest on dating him but she prefers to make up and flirt anyway because she puts those things above her interest in OP).

It doesn't matter anyway because the end result is the same if OP actually knows how to read people, i.e, op may or may not continue hooking up with her but won't date her.
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>>18148323
>implying people can only like one person at a time
>implying OP even built enough attraction with this girl over the course of these two weeks
>implying 'liking' someone automatically creates an exclusive bond
>implying guys in general won't be up for watching attractive girls make out
>implying the girl thinks it's a good idea to go monogamous on someone she might only see for another four weeks

Before this ass of a thread continues, it'd be good to know what exactly happened in those two weeks. Did you even get based, OP?
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>>18148339
Oh no, wait. I read the OP again
>and we hadn't even slept together yet

on further inspection
>Everything seemed healthier than many of my past relationships to start, but one week into it
I'm curious to understand how someone who knows so little about the conducts of relationships can tell, just after seven days of """hooking up""", that this is a healthier relationship than "many" of his past attempts.

I'm starting to expect that the hooking up included much tipping of way too popular hats.
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>>18148339
None of that matters.

Girl supposedly likes OP (said so herself). Still decides it's a good idea to make up and flirt with other people in front of him. Either she's
A) Not interested in OP
B) Retarded.

Pick your poison
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>>18148396
C) a teenaged girl/very young woman
>>
>>18148410
C) doesn't exclude the other two. She can be C) or not but she definitely is A) or B). No point in considering C) since A) or B) already signal not dating.

You seem to have lots of problems with basic logic
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>>18148425
Funny, since A and B aren't mutually exclusive, either.

You seem to have very little understanding of how attraction works, and I'm betting shiny money on OP's complete lack of gain on the road to building it.
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>>18148354
This. OP you are an autist if you use hooking up to mean anything less than PIV ficky ficky. If she really liked you as much as she said she did, she wouldn't have made out with the other guy and girl, especially not in front of you. Cut your losses, get the fuck out. Also, it doesn't count as a breakup.
>>
What fetish do girls like ? Which do you enjoy or think in a sexy way ? Do women like man with a fetish ? Or do you found it stupid? I got laid less than 10 times, don't get me wrong, I would like to die from snu snu but it is kinda boring right ?
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>the "exclusivity talk"

How fucking dusgusting have this people to be.
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>>18147927
I forgot that we can no longer assume normality and even the most basic of morals
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>>18148396
Insecure because OP won't fuck her so she tried to turn him on by making out with a girl in front of him.
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>>18149784
>>18149787
As if human males haven't fought over females since the dawn of creation. Do you really think it's in women's instinct to just settle for the first guy who shows interest?

>Boy A kisses Girl 1
>Boy A assumes Girl 1 is now his property, and that they are now in an exclusive relationship, aka taken, aka not single
>Girl 1 wants someone who will work to get her, before she stops living out her freedom as a single person, as all women do*
>Girl 1 is single, so she makes out with whomever she wants, who wants it back
>Boy A shows assertiveness, by giving Girl 1 ultimatum, after making thread on 4chan last week
>Girl 1 accepts
>Boy A is confuse and ponders whether to give her a chance or break up, after already giving her a chance, so makes thread on 4chan again
>Anon complains that these aren't the good old days, when we could hit women into submission, instead of learning how to be outstanding, good men who get what they deserve*
>...?
>Profit when older and wiser

Footnotes
**In some cases the 'working to get her' is nothing more than her falling in love with BOY X for reasons he's already displaying in his very nature and interraction.
*We always get what we deserve, according to the way we treat others. Complaining about it is part of that treatment.
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>>18147930
Try to fuck her ASAP
Obviously, dump her when you leave
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>>18149143
Different girls like different things. There is no universal fetish.

As with any fetish, it depends on the compatibility. Someone with similar fetishes is going to be very happy that you have them, and someone who is made uncomfortable by them is not gonna like it at all.
Thread posts: 45
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