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So let me start off by mentioning that about half a year ago, my uncle moved into our house (three bedroom condo, with, including him, now five people in it), because he got a divorce. Initially, our family was pretty supportive of him. We tried to help, get his situation sorted, all that kind of stuff.
As the months went by though, he began having issues. The person he was with was particularly vindictive, and stretched the trials and all that out as far as they could take them, and this caused my uncle a lot of stress, which he's unfortunately started taking out on my family.
Nothing violent yet, but he's been getting increasingly emotionally unstable. He's flipped me off, told me "fuck you," and called me a prick. Now, I'm an adult, I can take a few names, but he's begun to act this way around my mother, and my 80 year old grandmother, which just isn't acceptable.
Both of them agree this is a problem, and frankly, at this point, I just want him out of the house. The issue is though, through all of this, he hasn't exactly been paying rent. He has no money, due to lawyer fees and a bunch of other bullshit. On top of his regular job, he's been doing a bit of Uber on the side, so I know he's not exactly flush with cash.
I don't know where he would go, and I'm not sure it's exactly right to toss someone obviously going through some shit, out on the streets. What I'm worried about though is escalation. Our family has had some mental issues in the past, and he's a big guy (yes, for me. he's an inch or two taller, and about 150 pounds heavier), and I can't always be there if something goes down.
Just the other night, I came home to find out he suddenly decided he didn't want to talk to me or my mother anymore. I wasn't even in the same city when he figured I had apparently wronged him. It's Saturday, and he's still acting like this.
Keep in mind, this guy is over 40 years old.
Anyway, any of you folks know how to deal with unwanted house guests like this?
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Call the cops OP.
My step uncle was living in a house with his mother. He didn't treat her well so all the siblings got together and moved her into a home letting uncle still stay in the house that is technically grandmas. So what does uncle do with his own place? He invites some crack whore to live with him and does a bunch of drugs. He then rents out the garage which is a separate building with no electricity or running water to some guy to live in. We called the cops and kicked all their asses out.
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Gonna give this a bump to see if anyone thinks police should be involved.
Also, for what it's worth, his ex was a druggie. Prescription stuff, but still.
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what you do is explain to him how grateful he should be. family is blood yes, but family is also how you treat those who reach out to you in times of need
that os why good friends can be family
so once again, make it as clear as day how grateful he should be that he even gets the clmfort of staying with you, how nice it is of you to not charge him a dime
stress or no stress you talk he should talk out and realize things could be worse
so once again. make his dumb ungrateful ass understand
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>>18081685
I've tried that, but the guy has a fucking chip on his shoulder. Acts like we're not offering him anything. He hates living here, since with him now, the house is especially cramped, but he knows he doesn't have anywhere else to go. He'd be sleeping in his car without us.
That's kind of the issue. He's taking advantage of all of us, but kicking him out would literally be forcing a family member to become homeless.
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>>18081770
If he's being an asshole to you in your own home, then HE IS ASKING TO BE KICKED OUT.
Just because he's family doesn't mean he isn't being a piece of shit. If getting kicked out is going to be a problem for him, oh well, he shouldn't have been acting like a piece of shit.
Understanding that someone, family or not, isn't in a good circumstance doesn't mean that you're obligated to turn yourself into a doormat for him.
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>>18081841
The fact that I haven't been a doormat is part of the problem. I call him on all this shit, and it just makes him angrier. Make no mistake, I want him out of the house, but what I'm concerned is he'd do something stupid, and either hurt himself, or someone else.
It kinda reminds me f a bad Pepe comic. The type where you've got a smug, NEET frog, and a Wojack who doesn't know what the hell to do with him.
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>>18081881
You're tolerating shitty behavior in your home.
You're letting someone be abusive without consequence.
That is being a doormat.
You can make whatever excuses you want about WHY you're being a doormat, but that doesn't change how you're behaving.
You want your uncle to change his behavior, but why should he? There's no incentive to change, and no negative consequence that will happen if he doesn't.
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