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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

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Thread replies: 385
Thread images: 17

GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.

FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever.

>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.

>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.

>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships, that guy who says monogamy is dead and fart guy
Fuck off
>>
So I have a comically small dick (3.5 inches hard)

This makes it pretty difficult for me to have very much self confidence when it comes to hooking up with someone I don't have a strong relationship with for fear of judgement. So I'm not really sure how to approach things, I have a tinder prospect that wants me to come over tonight but I really don't know if I want to because of this.

Can I get some outside perspectives on this?
>>
>>18080830
Need to know too, mine's also that size and I'm deeply saddened the entire world has bigger dicks than mine.
>>
What do ladies think when they see a 10/10 man in a relationship an average-looking woman?
>>
>>18080867
"Good for her, she landed herself a hunk"
>>
>>18080830
Not all girls are size queens.

I don't know how this girl would react because I am not her. But I tend to think that women who want one night stands, are expecting something out of a fantasy. I don't have hook ups, but when my friends dish about theirs, they are more likely to be cunts to a guy because there is no emotional attachment.

Don't want to scare you though. I am not a size queen. Was completely in love with one of my exs. His penis was around 3 inches. We still had very good sex and were very attached to each other.
>>
>>18080830
If it makes you feel any better I'm attractive and have a 7" dick but can't even talk to girls.
>>
>>18080867
Admittingly, I used to have petty thoughts especially if I knew the guys and thought he was cute.

Personally I don't care much anymore. That's their life.

However, if a girl is really ugly, really controlling, and just a cunt and has a really nice and handsome bf... I may just wonder, "Why?" Sometimes I think some guys just like to be treated badly because they think all women are like that.
>>
Do girls really believe the stereotype that guys just want sex and nothing else, and will do anything to get it, or do you think is just that, a stereotype?
>>
>>18080890
I think guys on 4chan are like that, and I don't think it's far from the truth. Guys IRL? Not so much.
>>
Asking women.
How would you feel about finding out a guy stuffs his pants in the crotch area as a confidence booster, assuming the date and everything leading up to the sex went well? Im technically above average penis size but im too tall and it looks small on me. So i usually have a large carrot or small squash taped to my inneer thigh throughout the day.
>>
>>18080899
Instant turnoff. I wouldn't say anything at the time, but I'd tell me friends about it and find an excuse to never see you again.
>>
>>18080893
>I think guys on 4chan are like that
Was that a sly dig at >>18080890, anon?
>>
>>18080899
You don't need to be a woman to know this is completely autistic.
>>
>>18080890
I didn't want to believe this but since my ex cheated on me with an escort I'm having trouble with that. So it's more like I just hope it's not true.
>>
>>18080830
Personally I understand your fear of judgment from someone you don't have established trust with, but keep in mind that if a girl finds your size disappointing, it's actually worse as a long term relationship prospect than just for the night.

I don't think most girls would care much in this situation, let alone to the point where they'd comment, but if you hook up a lot you are undoubtedly going to run into someone who has a bitchy comment. There is no other choice really than to be convinced that there's more pride in being physically imperfect than in being a cunt about others being human.

Make no mistake, not everyone out there having casual sex looks like a supermodel naked. Bodies are weird and wild, that's part of the appeal. And honestly it seems less awkward to me to have a below average dick for a one night stand practically speaking, than an 8" dick that will need tons of warming up and will most likely still hurt her after that.

Also, virtually every guy lies about his size so most girls have a skewed idea of how big a certain size is.

>>18080867
I'd like to say "good for her", but being brutally honest I'd think she was his sister or whatever before assuming she was his partner. If I saw them make out or something, I'd be pleasantly surprised and reckon she was a pretty damn cool person (and probably dynamite in bed).
>>
>>18080830
it depends on the woman, but you can compensate for it by using toys, vibrators, your hands, foreplay, or anything creative. if a man used a vibe with me it wouldn't matter at all to me how small his dick was (and if it were a meaningful relationship, I would be trying to please him more than myself). so try to connect on something more than a sexual level, but if it's a fling, just learn how else you can please a woman (ie the clitoris). if she doesn't give you a chance because of it then she's not worth it.
>>
>>18080890
No, I don't.
>>
>>18080830
>>18080912
Also just wanted to add that you shouldn't underestimate that there's plenty of guys who are pretty fucking shitty to hook ups. Some of my friends have done one night stands a lot and I've heard all kinds of stories, from guys who keep ignoring firmly established boundaries over and over again ("I don't want to give you head" followed by constantly pushing her head down towards his crotch - but obviously there's no way in hell he will consider going down on her) to complete lack of foreplay, casually grabbing lube if the girl is obviously dry instead of trying to turn her on, trying to go for anal under the guise of a mistake etc etc...

Forget about not being some demi-God sexually, if you treat her respectfully, try to turn her on, somewhat know what to do etc you won't stand out as a bad lover.
>>
>>18080910
Sex with a professional isn't cheating.
>>
>>18080867
I am a guy, but you have to understand some people will find attractive what others think is average or ugly.

For example, I am a fat fuck, but my gf is slim and hot, she says she likes "chubby" men, why? I don´t know, but I believe her because she seems to really enjoy it when we have sex.

I mean, we live in a world that has people that find eating shit sexy, everything is possible.
>>
>>18080936
Will you solicit your girlfriend beforehand about going to a hooker? No? Then you damn well know it's cheating and are just trying to find a technical loophole out of monogamy.
>>
My gf and I have been dating for 6 months, and things have been going swimmingly. I'm her first serious relationship, so any issues we've had have been due to her inexperience with being in one.

She works in a kitchen, so her schedule is pretty wild. I always try to make time and sacrifices so we can see each other, but it feels like she doesn't try anywhere near as hard as I do. I knew she would be getting off late last night, so I bailed on some friends so she and I could hang out when she got off. She said she was tired, and just wanted to eat pizza and go to bed. Whatever, she's tired after work, fine. She just told me she was going to hang out with a bunch of her girlfriends after work tonight though, so that's one more night we lose. And we usually like to get breakfast Sunday mornings, but I know she'll be tired as hell tomorrow morning, so that's out.

I've tried talking to her about it, and she doesn't seem to get it. Like I said, I write it off to her just not knowing a relationship is making sacrifices. Is there any other way I can say/show it to her? She's a dream in every other regard, just not the whole field of making time for me.
>>
>>18080950
>Like I said, I write it off to her just not knowing a relationship is making sacrifices.
This isn't a 'making sacrifices' issue. This is a 'you are needier than she is' issue. I can see that you feel neglected, but she's also got a life outside of you and she needs to balance everything
>>
>>18080950
If you have tried to explain it a few times already, I don't really see yuou finding a magical combination of words that will make her understand she needs to make an active investment here.

Have you made it clear that you don't feel like enough of a priority for her? That it sucks that you accomodate to her only to realize that it's not reciprocated? That it feels one-sided if you're always the one who needs to make sure you actually see each other?
>>
>>18080950
Dont make effort for someone who doesn't make an effort for you. Have some self respect.

Just enjoy the pussy and pull away from the relationship a bit. Make her do some work.
>>
Am I gay for not wanting to fuck other women while my gf watches even if she says she wants to try it?

It just doesn´t feel right to me, I am not even religious or anything, I just don´t want to do it with anybody else.
>>
>>18080955
I kind of disagree. Sure, if OP expects they see each other three or more times a week he could also dial back/they might just be incompatible.

But I do think it's not more than normal attentiveness to keep an eye on who puts in the effort. Eg it's fine to be tired after work, but then you can actively suggest to make time on another day so it is obvious that you are both showing you want to be together sometimes and have quality time. If she's just constantly either shutting "OP" down or engaging him if it happens to fit her schedule, it's not realistic to expect him to be okay with that forever.
>>
>>18080970
Well we don't know what their schedules are like so we can't really tell. Plus, from what he said about her making plans to go out with her friends, it seems like she's one to make plans in advance, while he's more spontaneous, which leads to this issue. He wants to do something with her, but she's already made plans to do something else.
>>
>>18080968
No, not at all. You just have a different outlook on monogamy and whether a wild night can fit into that, but there's plenty of people who would agree with either of your sides. And many women who wish that their guy whole-heartedly only wanted to fuck them and didn't just give up other women for the sake of keeping her (and the other way around as well, of course).
>>
>>18080977
Not saying she shouldn't be going out with friends, just that it's normal to take note and try to compromise when you have to shoot your partner down.

Unless he really is one clingy motherfucker and then she should learn to communicate and tell him she wants to see him, but not all the damn time.
>>
>>18080968
Your gf sounds kind nuts, no offence.
>>
>>18080990
Oh please, she is, I know that better than anyone, but I still love her.
>>
>>18080968
Not at all mate.
Holy shit worrying about not wanting to fuck other girls while your gf watcher. What a year 2017
>>
Why do I get more and more sentimental and dark once sun goes down and the night advances?

It goes somethign like:
>Hey life's okay at sunset
>Hey I really fucked up that one time at dusk
>Hey the creeping feeling of inadequacy is back again once it's completely dark
>Hey I feel like a fuck up chump at midnight
>Go to sleep
>Wake up
>Hey life's pretty good at morning
>>
>>18080990
I'd find that hot. I don't think I'd actually want to experience it for obvious reasons, but it has a few points of appeal. For one thing you can grow used to your partner and sort of see them too much as your best friend, even if the sex sparks are still flying. You lose the insecurity and thrill of the chase. In certain situations (like suddenly seeing them in a professional role) your usual mindset is taken away and you can see them with new eyes and realize again how amazing they are, not just to you as a trusted loved one but "objectively" as a person with charm and good looks, even appealing to strangers. If you see your guy seducing another woman, it's like you can by proxy experience that again, see him as the attractive stranger with sexual charisma.

That and you can see him do all the things he usually does to you with a perspective you don't usually have. See what his body looks like fucking, in the flesh. See him drive someone insane like he drives you insane. That's pretty hot to me. Just crazily risky to actually do with someone you love, of course.
>>
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Girls

Have you ever gone on a date with a nu-male? What was it like?
>>
>>18080890
No. Sometimes I think that women tell themselves this when their personal flaws destroy their relationships with men.

I am not saying that some women cause their bfs to cheat on them and it's all their fault.

Basically, I feel like I hear this from women who:
>treat their bf like shit, but get all crazy when things get rocky, then get crushed when he eventually either cheats or immediately gets a relationship after theirs ended
or
>girls who put out on the first date before even knowing if there is a true connection, then get hurt that he "pumped and dumped"

With the second reason, I really feel like it had nothing to do with the sex, and more for the fact that he probably didn't like you. That being said, I have come to realize that with a lot of men, sex is just sex, and men are more open to doing it with someone they are physically attracted to, even though there is not much of an emotional attraction.


But is it just sex? No. I kinda feel like both genders tend to jump into sex for the wrong reasons. Some women tend to think men want to have sex with them because the man wants to start an emotional investment with them. I also feel like some men think, "hey if she's offering, I'm down and we can talk about what it meant after."
>>
>>18080998
It´s just that, I thought there was something wrong with me since I am a man so I am suppossed to want as much sex as possible right? I even remember when I told "no" to my gf she had this disbelief face like, as if I told her I killed someone.
>>
>>18081008
A (girl) friend of mine had an ex-bf that fitted the bill, she complained once that his dick couldn't get fully hard. I think that sums it up those guys.
>>
>>18081008
Not a girl, but I have seen these type of men having gfs, however, it´s mostly with controlling women that only want them for their submissive attitude.
>>
>>18081008
Dear god no.

But I have a friend who has been in a relationship with one for years. She's a strong feminist liberal and tumblr "punk", allbeit absolutely beautiful and rather intelligent despite all the liberal shit she spews.

I could never imagine myself being attracted to one of them. But, he offers her a calm, wealthy, comfortable life with whatever weird shit he is actually making good money off of.
>>
>>18081008
I know these stereotypes but I have never actually met anyone like that. And I go to a university full of hipsters who preach polyamory and do have beards. I find it hard to believe, not so much that people who fit an entire description like that exist, but rather that they're a whole thing instead of an outlier on so many hundred people.
>>
>>18081008
How does a perfectly functional man of the human species turn into a numale? What's the trigger?
>>
>>18081037
Most of them are weak (and somehow wealthy) men looking for female validation.
>>
>>18081037
Single mothers.
>>
>>18081031
I can guarantee you she's fucking someone on the side.
>>
>>18081037
I honestly think they are birthed into wealthy white liberal, but Christian families from suburbs. Trust fund babies. Educated at far left colleges. And deep down, just want that tumblr girl pussy and this is one of the ways to get it.
>>
>>18081044
Wouldn't doubt it at all.
>>
Question for both.

Do you think there is any valid justification for cheating?
>>
>>18081051
No.
>>
>>18081051
Just one: you plausibly thought you were broken up or not together yet.

But, I do think that young people typically think too black and white about cheating. Eg expressing disbelief that someone isn't going to instantly leave a person they loved for twenty years and have raised kids with because they slept with someone else in a lapse of judgment. Shit goes down in life and no matter how comfortable it may be to tell yourself that only soulless people would ever potentially cheat, that's not the case.
Or, what I see a lot as well, acting like whatever the other person did wrong in the relationship is instantly irrelevant if the other party has cheated [and they decide to try to work it out]. Not realistic and not going to get anyone anywhere.

But valid justification, no. In fact I really detest seeing stuff like "if someone cheated the relationship was apparently bad". Fuck. That. People can do insanely shitty things for no reason at all, and implicitly shifting blame to the partner who just got cheated on is just vile.
>>
>>18081051
Nope. If you're unhappy in the relationship, break up.
>>
>>18081051
If you were on a break!
>>
>>18081061
How can you sleep with someone "in a lapse of judgement"? It is a chain of events that can be broken up at any point in the chain by just thinking "Wow I shouldn't be doing this". Plenty of time to correct that initial lapse of judgement.
>>
>>18081072
It's just a phrase. I think there's plenty of people who cheat who don't even regret it to begin with. I wasn't trying to imply that they don't have responsibility in any way.
>>
>>18081075
I see. English isn't my first.
>>
>>18081081
I think you misread. It was NOT my intention to make it sound like whether they regret it or not impacts their responsibility.

>>18081083
Not mine either, there's probably a better way to say what I meant. Basically that someone fucks up doesn't negate everything good right away for everyone.

Was also not trying to imply that there's anything unreasonable about wanting to divorce over it, either. Just that both are understandable to me.
>>
Girls, do you feel threatened by men?

I see all the fear mongering that feminist do, about all men being potential rapist and stuff like that, I wonder how much of that actually gets to women.
>>
Do women in their 20s know that settling down in their 30s will be hard or do they get that conclusion, when they already are in their 30s?
>>
>>18081088
Generally, no. I don't adjust my life to it either, I'll walk home late at night if it works out that way. (Although to be fair, I do live in a safe area.)

But I absolutely am aware that by far most men could easily overpower me. Eg if I walk around at night and a man is behind me, I will turn off my music so I instantly hear it if he starts walking faster. If a man comes up from the opposite direction, I make a snap decision about whether he seems more likely to get offended if I obviously avoid eye contact, or more likely to feel provoked if I do make eye contact, and act accordingly. If it's really late I have some improvised weapon in my hand (like keys). I know what my strategy is if someone attacks me.

Again, this isn't extreme stuff. I will go on a date with a guy I don't know, I don't let a girlfriend know where I am in these cases etc. I don't really see these things as being afraid or feeling threatened but just, you know, looking out for myself. There's risks all around but I don't want to have to resent myself for being careless if I do get attacked.
>>
>>18081092
Protip: no one actually plans to only settle down in their thirties. Not even most men. What happens much more often is that women want to settle down in their mid or late twenties and then get stuck in messy relationships that aren't stable enough for it.
>>
>>18081092
None of the women I know who are single in their 30s are or have settled.
>>
>>18081100
Should have added that with this settling down I do mean, moving in/getting engaged with their serious boyfriend. Not necessarily also having kids yet.
>>
Where should I open my cumcake bakery?
>>
>>18081051
No.

Cheating is for greedy egotistical faggots who want everything for themselves and want to escape their decisions having consequences.

Cheaters are low-life. Never trust one.
>>
>>18081095
So, in short, you are aware there are risks but you think men inherently dangerous right?
>>
>>18081118
Not sure if you meant to say it like this or meant to say "not inherently dangerous" because right now it doesn't make sense to me. But yeah, not inherently dangerous but risky. Statistically speaking, I'm not going to get raped or killed by a woman. Testosterone is just a big element in acts of aggression. And logically speaking, even if a woman wanted to attack me, there's a much smaller chance she could hurt me the way a man could. That's about it. I don't think most men are rapists, in the least.
>>
>>18081088
Environment and appearance play a part.

I am generally not afraid of my male peers.

I don't think every man is a rapist, but certain behaviors of strange men scare me.

>been followed off a bus by a stranger for several blocks
>been begged to get into a middle aged man's car when I was a teen, he just kept shouting "This poor girl must need a ride home! Are you sure you're okay? Please let me take you home!" like he was trying to make this look normal.
>when i was 14 and walking home from practice, a literal police man pulled over, called me sexy, and asked if I needed a ride home.

It's context that makes me afraid of men. When I am in situations that relate to those previous, I get afraid. But I am not afraid of men in general.
>>
Got cheated on, her friend broke the news, because she thought I need to know, I thanked her and closed the phone. I feel like a useless piece of shit who can't please a woman so she as to tun to someone else's arms, self-esteem is now probably the lowest it's ever been and I can't help but wonder what she's been up to behind my back and what she has told about me to people. Tomorrow I'll probably go yell at her for being a cheating cunt, then drive home and cry like a baby.

How to cope with this?
>>
>>18081121
Probably should have included that I actually did get followed by a guy I'm pretty sure had the impulse to rape me once. But it didn't really alter my behavior either way and it did not traumatize me so... not complaining.
>>
>>18081125
Message her that she has until X to get her stuff before you put it outside.

Don't respond to any messages, and delete all contact information, Facebook, etc.

Never see or talk to her ever again.
>>
>>18081125
>time
>distraction
>look after yourself well (enough sleep, proper food, get some sun)
>crying, venting, shooting range, breaking glasses, lifting weights, whatever works for you

DO NOT take responsibility for her being a shit partner to you. You are selling yourself short and giving her way too much credit for implying anything "drove" her to anyone else.

Sorry to hear man. Nurse your broken heart and be happy someone respected you enough to tell you.
>>
I'm handsome and smart, but not very sociable, don't believe in myself, and have no idea where to meet women. How do I fix this?
>>
>>18081125
Realize you're probably a beta dude who is passive to your gf and change that. Women need a man who will take charge, not one who will do anything to pleasure them.
>>
>>18081139
Make friends, take every chance to be social. As for where to meet women;

>dating sites/apps
>other internet stuff like hobby forums or online gaming communities
>college
>through friends
>hobby courses
>local events
>volunteering
>work
>going out (dancing, bars)
>speed dating events
>>
>>18081137
I wouldn't want to go on a shooting range in this mindstate or the next one that comes when the shock clears.

Maybe I'll just go jog somewhere in the forest and punch a tree until my knuckles are broken.
>>
>>18081140
Well thank you cunt. I'm not some submissive retard. I was in the lead through this whole fucking relationship. And by the way, taking the lead and pleasuring your woman completely aren't mutually exclusive.
>>
Girls, I know getting dick pics is something you find disgusting because it is obviously a creepy thing to do, but, is that the only reason, or do you find most dicks to look disgusting?
>>
>>18081182
I don't find dicks disgusting in the least but I do think they look best either in real life or a softfocus shot with a flattering angle. They can look really in your face/graphic and not particularly aesthetic in a given picture. Honestly I think most people's genitals are not exactly pretty.

I feel that many men think a dick pic is comparable to a picture of boobs, whereas for a woman it's more comparable to a spread pussy shot with the hole in view and lips dangling out. Hot from someone you love to fuck or when you're already worked up or something, but out of nowhere while your head is elsewhere? Not exactly erotic.
>>
>>18081169
>I feel like a useless piece of shit who can't please a woman

Sounds pretty submissive to me. If you're not confident you could score and please any girl anytime or if you suspect maybe you wouldn't be as fulfilled being single, if a woman so much as smells that you don't wear the pants of the relationship and that you're dependent on her for any kind of validation you'll get cheated on, it implies the power dynamics are shifted for her side and as much as they won't admit, girls don't want power for themselves and if you give them any she will find another dude that won't give them nothing and will just do what he wants.
You need to be a successful (not necessarily financially) and a put-together man with solid life goals and accomplishments before you even think about seriously getting together with a woman. Let this be a lesson.
>>
>>18081182
>dicks are ugly (yes, I know vaginas aren't much better)
>dickpics are usually unsolicited
>they do nothing for me, now I have an ugly picture, what am I supposed to do with it?
>>
>>18081189
You wouldn't feel bad and sad when some cunt cheats on you? You'd just shrug it off? Guess I am a total beta submissive faggot after all.
>>
>>18081207
You need to be whole enough to just shrug it off yes, if so, I guarantee you that you will find another woman in the blink of an eye. Your fault for maybe never making her feel jealous and threatened in the relationship, or making her be fearful of ever losing you. As it stands, you're easily replaceable with a better man.
>>
>>18081211
Your advice is to be a sociopathic manipulator?
t. different anon
>>
Girls, how much does a guy´s hobbies affect your opinion on him? independently of how obsessed he is with them.
>>
>>18081125
>I feel like a useless piece of shit who can't please a woman so she as to tun to someone else's arms
Women aren't kids you stupid fuck. They know well what they're doing and the possible consequences for their actions. Stop being such a paternalistic cunt.

Also, cut contact and what this anon >>18081137
said
>>
Guys and girls, since I am a virgin I kind of wonder how physically exhausting sex is.
How long does the sex last?
Which muscles are usually most sore?
>>
I would like to ask this to a girl:

Do you ever forget your first love or the guy who took your virginity?

Thanks!
>>
>>18081229
Depends on what they are.

>>18081243
Probably not, but he's also a significant person in my life.
>>
>>18081226
My advice is to be a man, this feminist bullshit of 'toxic masculinity' have spoiled many kids. The power dynamics of relationships always were men>woman, otherwise it's dysfunctional.

Now power can mean many things, usually the guys makes more money, but it can be that he's hotter, smarter or just older. That's exactly what women want, an emotional anchor they can rest on.
If you think being a leader and doing what you need to do according to your ideals and providing a solace of confidence and assurance to another person being a 'sociopath' then you have a seriously misplaced sense of morality.
>>
>>18081250
>Depends on what they are

Could you give me some quick examples?
>>
>>18081252
It was more the part where you said that you need to go out of your way to make your partner jealous or fearful of losing you that struck me as manipulative.
>>
How to tell if you should ask girl out to coffee or just straight over to your place from OKCupid?
>>
>>18081252
hell of a 'leader' you are sitting here shitposting. dude get your head out of your fucking ass you're still a manipulative piece of dogshit
>>
>>18081260
Maybe it is, but if you don't create the possibility of end or loss, a relationship stagnates really quick. Either way, if you don't depend on you gf for any validation whatsoever she will feel slightly jealous and will fear losing you naturally, those are the happiest couples.

>>18081272
Your resentment doesn't affect me.
>>
>>18081254
How about we just cut the bullshit and you just tell us what your hobbies are?
>>
>>18081295
painting
woodworking
amateur astronomy
weight lifting
>>
>>18081243
Nobody does anon.
>>
>>18081243
I'm a pretty sentimental person, I need a lot less than loving someone or having sex with them (let alone for the first time) to never forget them. So no.
>>
>>18081235
>Guys and girls, since I am a virgin I kind of wonder how physically exhausting sex is.
Depends entirely on the individual, and what they're doing duh.

Some people last two minutes, some people last two hours. The average is about 5-10


>>18081267
>OKCupid

In my experience, OKC =/= Tinder.

Compared to Tinder, people go on OKC are more likely to be there to date rather than just straight up hookup.

With that in mind, in my opinion coffee is usually the best introduction for two people to meet because it's a safe public place that's non-committal, but also can easily be transitioned in to something more.

But then again, maybe my experience is outdated. It's been a couple years since I've used it, but that's because I met a girl on OKC, and have been with her since.
>>
>>18081211
>Your fault for maybe never making her feel jealous and threatened in the relationship, or making her be fearful of ever losing you.

Dayum this nigga is spot on

A chase is important to a girl. If she thinks she always has you,there's no incentive to keep trying so she gets bored, complacent and dangerously daring.

>>18081267
Nigga just autism it out and plan your responses so the convo goes as follows

>[You say Hi]
She returns it
>[You make a joke about something practical like a place]
She laughs
>[You keep the joke going]
She bantz or says it sounds fun
>[You ask her out]
She drops her info

If you wanna extend it a bit sure whatever but it's important to not let it drag on and become acquainted with her over the damn thing. Shit like "What do you do" is for when you meet her.
>>
>>18081252
>The power dynamics of relationships always were men>women
>he's stupid enough to think that the cultural trope shown in society accurately reflected the intimate dynamics that went on in countless different relationships

And in our society all men only care about sex and all women only care about love, amirite?
>>
>>18081337
Your post is incoherent.
>>
>>18081345
Let me spell it out for you. There is a significant difference between personal life as it's depicted culturally, politically and so on and how it's actually lived behind closed doors. That the norm has always been that the man is the one who leads in the relationship, says next to nothing about who was actually the more powerful one in their one on one dynamic. It just says that the consensus in society was that this was what a normal/ideal relationship looked like. Which is always a huge simplification of and more narrow representation of the messier reality.
>>
>>18081235
I'm 29, male.
>Guys and girls, since I am a virgin I kind of wonder how physically exhausting sex is.
Pretty exhausting, but, in the heat of the moment, you don't feel it or care.
>How long does the sex last?
My first lasted 40 minutes at the age of 26. I usually last that much.
>Which muscles are usually most sore?
Legs and abs, I think. I'm not /fit/.
>>
>>18081332
What's the fun in fucking for only 5-10 minutes?
>>
>>18081350
I'm sorry that you went into debt for a gender studies degree but that doesn't give you the right to just go on the internet and tell lies
>>
>>18081363
For a lot of people fucking itself is the cherry to top it all off after enjoying foreplay/oral etc. Besides the sensitivity of the vagina goes down after a while, the sensation of penetration grows more stale and even if she's very wet especially hard sex can make her fluids lacking which makes sex less comfortable and requires lube etc.
>>
>>18081363
You know that sex is more than just putting a penis in a vagina and thrusting, right? Add in foreplay and another round and you can make it last longer.
>>
>>18081235
Depends. If you're just fucking it can be very tiresome, sex is middlw ground and making love is generally not tiring at all.

Same for how long, it varyies. Generally between 10-25 minutes for me.

I rarely get sore but when I do, it's legs.
>>
>>18081365
What exactly is a lie about saying that cultural tropes don't do justice to reality? You're the one making bold historical claims when you obviously have no sense of reality or nuance.

Do you think Victorian people didn't have sex? Everyone used to be a devout Catholic before the first big secularization movements? People didn't do drugs in the - hah - prim and proper fifties?

Retard.
>>
Why are there no Chad online courses?
>>
>>18081350
>consensus in society

HAHAHAHAH so you're telling me that people entered this dynamic because because some unseen powerful force obligated them? You're out of your fucking mind.
>>
>>18081385
Who would make them? They're too busy out fucking your girlfriend.
>>
>>18081386
Actually I in no way implied that it has a cultural origin. Women needing to be at home to nurse the kids was a biological reality that in turn shaped people's ideas. Men are obviously biologically stronger and a more dominating presence.

Go read a few proper books (like Ada - or hell, Lolita - from Nabokov, Married Life from David Vogel, Anna Karenina from Tolstoy, whatever less famous examples) of authors from past times and it will be obvious that just because the man socially has more importance does not mean that he has more power in the romantic relationship. That is too personal to be dictated - to some extent influenced, in many cases, no doubt - by anything contemporary.
>>
Quick! I live with my mother still and had a girl over that I've seen a few times. We made out and fooled around for about 1.5 hours but my mother came home and she got nervous. But said to me we can go further the next time your she isn't home.

So tonight my mother is going over a friends house and it is just going to be me. The girl did say she was gonna be busy and we do have something planned for Monday. How do I text her that she should come over tonight without sounding desperate?
>>
>>18081397
Lolita and Anna were obvious outliers, you can't tell what an average married woman was like by those books. Plus the power is merely as perceived by the woman and how she sees the man as a kind of protector, it doesn't mean factual power or even dominance.
>>
>>18081412
>We made out and fooled around for about 1.5 hours
But you didn't have sex

> How do I text her that she should come over tonight without sounding desperate?
"my mother is out tonight, are you free to come over?"

Stop overthinking this
>>
Question for both, do you think there can be real romantic love between a teen boy/adult woman or teen girl/adult man?

Do you think a relationship like that could ever work out?
>>
>>18081434
Is there a possibility? Sure. Is it likely? Absolutely not. Is any relationship likely to be a result of manipulation and exploitation? Yep.
>>
>>18081415
Absolutely correct point, but I strongly, strongly doubt that this would be an interesting angle for a serious author if it had nothing (potentially) to do with real life. And these are not outliers either, they were the most striking examples that came to my mind.

The society we live in is a background decor that shapes our expectations and no doubt plenty of other stuff, but in the end what connections exist between people are unique. Even the most macho and masculine man is vulnerable, hopeful and in a way powerless when he's in love. And likewise, it's not like bratty, strong-minded or flat out domineering/controlling women did not exist before feminism. It just took different forms, they found different outlets for their urges and character. In general a lot more of personal life was simply unknown before mass media with countless movies, internet full of personal stories and so on.

>and how she sees the man as a kind of protector
Imo both people experience their partner as a protective, reassuring force in a healthy, blossoming relationship. Hell, I think many women would love a relationship in which they nurse and encourage their man in private and he is "the man" to the outside world even today. But that's a far cry from advocating that it's the man's job to undermine the woman's sense of security so he can keep her under his control.
>>
>>18081442
Just wanted to add that perhaps surprisingly, Roald Dahl has written absolutely great psychological stories for adults, and he's a master in mercilessly detailing how people can spoil each other's fun in an unhappy marriage. If you ever come across it, the story about the couple playing bridge is an amazing illustration of how a housewife can be a real tyrant in private.

Alice Munro also has some stellar stories about women fucking over their boyfriends/husbands - or psychologically holding them hostage - even when they had no say culturally (all the more because all her storylines take place in rural Canada, where most everyone is quite conservative).

And for what it's worth, apparently James Joyce's own wife gave him shit for writing "shit novels that no one understood". And if you really want to have a laugh, look up his love letters to her and read all about his scat and fart fantasies long before internet.
>>
As a guy, how can I stimulate my ldr?

We've been long distance for almost 3 months out of 1 year and we are talking less and less and it's making me worried.
>>
>>18081465
Either you see her or she sees you
If you can't do that you're going to get cucked. It's as simple as that.
>>
Girls, let´s say you meet a guy (in his mid or late 20s), you start to get along and eventually start dating and have sex.

And then you find out that you are not only the first girl he has ever had sex with, but also the first girl he has ever kissed, what would you think about the situation? does it changes your opinion on him?
>>
>>18081469
we live on the opposite sides of the world right now
>>
>>18081497
If anything I would be (understanding but) disappointed that he didn't tell me that beforehand. Making a man's first time a mind blowing experience is pretty damn high on my list of fantasies and it wouldn't be the same if I didn't realize it was literally all firsts for him.

But no, it wouldn't change my opinion. Yeah sometimes I meet guys who are obviously having a difficult time to connect with women (won't look me in the face or acknowledge my presence when talking to someone right next to me for prolonged time, stumbling over words etc) and that can be a very serious turn off. But then it's more the combination of being inexperienced and it being obvious why he hasn't managed to connect with a woman than being a virgin itself.
>>
>>18081508
>If anything I would be (understanding but) disappointed that he didn't tell me that beforehand

Seriously? I was always under the impression that if you are a virgin at that age, you shouldn´t tell something like that to your a girl until you already are on a certain level on the relationship or else you can scare her way.
>>
>>18081497
>eventually start dating and have sex.
I highly doubt we'd get to the sex point without me realising he was inexperienced
>>
How do I go on dates without a car?

I have reliable income, so I can take a cab or public transportation to and from, but no car. How big of an issue is this in a relationship?
>>
>>18081535
ok, but what will think about it at the time you realize it?
>>
>>18081527
To be fair I'm not the most typical person myself, I've been with one guy in my life and am technically still a virgin (don't really consider myself one psychologically but I've done oral etc but no kind of penetration) at almost twenty four, by choice. I'm not interested in flings or hook ups, only in really feeling connected to someone.

Anyway, no doubt both this and having spent a lot of time on here and reading from introverted/awkward young men's perspectives has given me somewhat above average understanding. But still, people are willing to empathize/accept more from people they really like than they would on paper for an anonymous "person". And it's really not true that every woman loses her virginity at sixteen or earlier, I know plenty of women myself who were later and would rather be with a virgin than with a guy who used to fuck every girl that stood still long enough for him to shove it in.

I'm not trying to say that it's impossible that you scare someone off. I would absolutely not tell this to a one night stand. But I do think that you should give someone you have serious feelings for the benefit of the doubt that their initial impression of you isn't going to be blown apart by this, and that they in turn will give you the benefit of the doubt even if it's far from their own life experience. Otherwise, what's the point in trying to be vulnerable around someone else to begin with?
>>
>>18081543
I understand that you have to be honest to the person you want to have something with, but always made the assumption (notice that I keep saying "impression" or "assumption" because I don´t know shit about women) that is a better idea to say something like that later because a women would be more understanding hearing that from someone they already feel something for that from someone that still trying to earn her.

But I appreciate your answer, it actually makes me feel a little more confident in myself (I am a 22 yo kissless virgin that only recently decided to try to get a gf for the first time), thanks for that.
>>
>>18081570
There is logic in that, and no doubt there is a group of women who would be more wary if they didn't know you well and would be more comfortable later on. How big or small that group is, is pretty much impossible to say. In that regard I have nothing else but a guess to offer, either.

But the flip side is that if it is natural for a woman that she would not think less of you for something like that, you are essentially not just telling her that about yourself, but also that when you started being intimate and falling in love, you did not actually fully trust her yet. To the point that you did not just not volunteer this information, but didn't spoke about it despite it being highly relevant and kind of expected within the context. It also depends on the individual whether she'd understand that and shrug it off, or would feel a bit insulted that you at that stage still thought she might judge you, or offended because she did choose to already share potentially very vulnerable information.

I guess for me the ultimate bottom line is that you shouldn't try to worry about it in advance and come up with a strategy already. See what kind of girl you actually wind up with and how it feels then.
No problem at all, best of luck!
>>
>>18081586
I will say it again, thank you, you might think this was just a reply you made to a rando on a chinese cartoon board, but this has really helped me, what you just did might change my life for the better, seriously, thank you!
>>
>>18081599
Aw you're welcome man, I sure hope it changes your life for the better, and if not something else does it for you. We all need that push to gain a new perspective sometimes. Cheers!
>>
My gf just had a dream about me Cucking her with her roommate. What might cause a girl to dream about this? I am quite concerned about how she views the relationship.
Some background: I have been kinda neglecting myself and my duties for like a month or so. and last night she nearly had a panic attack from a crowded, loud place.
>>
>>18081505
Exactly, do you think she isn't getting any over there?
>>
>>18081642
She told me she never cheated before, and we both told eachother what kind of relationship we want. She also comes from an Asian culture so I like to think she's not.
>>
>>18081635
There's really nothing specific you can read into this mate.
Could be a bottled up fantasy (or she never had a dream like that at all, just pretended to in order to test your reaction, which is what my money would be on)
Or it could just be as simple as "Wow I had a really fucked dream". The panic attack could have triggered weird nightmares/dreams too.

Like, I had a horrific dream once where the dude I was fucking turned into my dad.
I can promise you I have no desire to fuck my dad and it was the most uncomfortable I've ever felt waking up.

Side note though: Pick up the ball again man, if you can openly admit you've been neglecting yourself, start working on it.
>>
>>18081635
Dreams are dreams. Yeah if she dreams about it all the time it might be a (subconscious) insecurity, whether about your loyalty or about how attractive she is compared to other women in general, but a single dream isn't anything to take seriously. She probably had an anxious dream because she was still stressed.
>>
>>18081635
Dreams are always wish fulfillments. You banging another girl means you got 'game' and by deduction that your gf is good enough to have landed a guy who could have any other girl. It's a perverted desire but a desire nonetheless.
>>
>>18081539
Hmm, I'll admit this does kind of depend on where you live. Do you live in a city where taking public transport/cabs is pretty normal? Or do you live in fucking suburbia?
If the former, I wouldn't think too much into it. If the latter, it'd be weird to me I guess. Not deal breaking though because at least you're not gonna make me your chauffeur.
Thats honestly been my only complaint dating dudes without cars/licenses. It gets annoying to me to constantly have to be the one to drive him around. Would rather take turns.

But, you're willing to do something to make sure I'm not driving all the time regardless, so that's better.

Question though, if you do make good money, why not just buy a car? Unless you do live in a large city where a car is basically a waste of money.
>>
>>18081648
>She probably had an anxious dream because she was still stressed.
probably this..
>>
>>18081497
Not really. Because if I liked you enough to date you/fuck you and you didn't sperg out about insisting I know you're a virgin who's probably going to suck (and because you think you're going to suck, you will suck), then everythings fine by me.

Most of the time, women don't care about the virginity itself, they care about the complexes behind it. The massive weird insecurity and obsessiveness about it, that's what sucks. If he had the confidence to go into fucking me without having to give me the "I'm inexperienced and therefore I have zero confidence in my ability and am not even going to try to give you a good time, but please fuck me anyway" disclaimer, then I'd be more than fine with it.
>>
>>18080890
On one hand, stereotypes exist for a reason.
On the other, I still don't apply them to every single person with that characteristic, because the world just ain't that black and white and I think it's better not to make assumptions without prior evidence.

Are all men inherently just after sex?
No.
Are a lot of them though?
Yeah, especially the young ones.
And there's nothing even inherently wrong with that. Young people are in that weird stage of life where they've both got this new freedom but also responsibility. Forming serious shit in that time takes a fuck ton of effort and I don't blame anyone who doesn't want to put out that effort, but still fulfill their biological urges with willing people in the same mindset. So long as everything is honest and open, there's nothing wrong with just wanting sex and nothing more.

I also believe the majority of young guys who are just having lots of casual sex with no desire to settle down or form a relationship will grow out of it eventually. Most people settle down eventually with age.
>>
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>>18080867
Same thing I think when I see anyone in a relationship,
"Fuck those people why can't I be happy too?"
>>
To both genders;
Any tips for blowjobs? Nothing having to do with balls though because his are too ticklish.
>>
Girls, do you like the physical sensation of sucking a cock or do you only like the psicological aspect of doing it (pleasuring your man)?
>>
>>18081756
toungue action is key, and it isn't all about sucking. Lick from base to tip
>>
>>18081761
psychological, for me at least, and theoretically, most women. After all, we don't really have many pleasure nerves in our mouths. One could argue any pleasure received from sucking dick is 100% psychological.
>>
>>18081756
Ask him. I'll tell you what I like, but it may not work for him. Search for Avy Scott porn. I like how she sucks dicks, I've experienced very similar blowjobs.
I like slower, not much suction force, some licks.
>>
>>18081769
Now that we are talking about it, hows the physical sensation for you girls? is it disgusting?
>>
>>18081761
i like how it feels. like it gets me super wet and stuff but like >>18081769 said it's probably all psychological because your mouth isnt like a clit or something and i think PURELY physically, anything you do to it would feel pleasant at most.
>>
Do girls like the taste of dick? What does dick taste like?
>>
>>18081786
The only thing I don't like about it is the taste, so long as I'm also not choking on it or anything. Everything else about it is fine.
Cum doesn't taste very good, no matter what you do. But I'm sure vag isn't any better, so I put up with the precum. But I don't take full loads in the mouth.
>>
>>18081761
>>18081786
For me it's mostly psychological. I love the soft skin, the intimate taste and smell, and find the act of being so close to his genitals really nice, but it is too physically straining for me to be actually comfortable/fun just in that regard. I have a sensitive gag reflex so while I can manage not to gag there's constantly a sort of alarm bell going off in the back of my head and just keeping your teeth out of the way while doing stuff isn't 100% comfortable. Disgusting, no, not at all. And it's incredibly hot to feel him swell up even more, throb, leak precum etc when it's really good.

>>18081756
Use everything - your hands, your lips, your tongue, the inside of your cheek, your breasts, long hair, your breath. Make it into a show. I love to end a striptease or lapdance with a blowjob because it's such a visual act he can just lay back for. Do it naked or wear pretty lingerie that makes you feel sexy. Make him feel like you enjoy it: you don't have to do porn moans on his cock, but be eager about taking him into your mouth, lap up his precum, be energetic in trying different things. Make eye contact (occasionally), smile at him.

Slow blowjobs can be as good as frantic ones, but make sure you have a rhythm in mind, you don't want to be all over the place. Whether you go slow and sensual, fast and furious or building up from one to the other, stick to it. Do not stick to one sensation at a time, even the best feeling in the world grows stale. Instead remember what he likes most and return to that in unexpected moments to catch him by surprise and amp it up.
>>
>>18081796
I want to marry you.
>>
>>18081789
Like skin, a bit salty if he's sweaty. Nothing special. Precum is slightly metallic. Semen can range from virtually tasteless to sweet or bitter.

>>18081796
>cont'd advice

The corona (ridge around the head), peehole and primarily the frenulum (little tissue fold where the head connects with the shift, on "your side" of his dick) are sensitive spots. Typically the base of his dick etc is less sensitive and more for the sensation of being all enveloped. Use your tongue not just to lick but to press up against, twirl, tickle etc these spots. Tease him by mixing up taking up as deep as you can with staying up with the head and going with the softer sensations. Sticking your tongue out a bit really helps to take him further, but so does steady breathing and pushing your own limits a bit. The angle can also make a lot of difference.

A personal favorite that is hard to explain but I'll try to - he needs to be rock hard for this. Imagine he's sitting and you are propped up at his knees. Assume his dick has a certain angle like virtually all. His dick is throbbing and really pushing out into whatever direction his naturally has. What you do now is you lower your mouth and force your dick into it as straight as you possibly can. Really press down hard and open your mouth just narrowly enough for it to go in, so you are essentially forcing it into a shape it wants to escape from. This "escape" bounce only for him to hit another part of your mouth apparently feels insane.
Also, if you have issues with keeping your teeth covered, imagne you are trying to pick up an ice cube without letting it touch your teeth.

For special stuff you can use hot tea (or ice if he's hardcore). Obviously incorporate any of his kinks - if he's submissive, gingerly ask him if you can please suck his dick. Or make a show out of asking if you can please just look at it, then begging for - really only - a little taste.
>>
>>18081786
Its definitely not disgusting at all. I've swallowed every one of my boyfriends loads since we've been together and i make sure he only cums with me. Knowing I was the one who made him cum is another big of it too, so I think its probably equally physical (depending on what you mean by physical) and mental.
>>
>>18081811
During the act, you can make him put a heavy hand on the back of your head or around your throat, or play with you only to pull away when you start getting close.
If you're more dominant, no questions asked, you straddle him, unbuckle him and start sucking him off preferably while he's mid-sentence. (Obviously if you have a comfortable dynamic only.) Or you tease him with seeming tense/antsy, maybe he's backed up eh? Guess you need to give him something for that, right? Whatever works in your regular sex life.
If he is completely vanilla, you can edge him by coming up to his face and simply whispering to him how good he tastes, or that you want (him) to enjoy it a little bit longer still.

You'll know when he's close to cumming if his balls have completely risen to the shaft and probably more personal little cues. Make sure to put everything in for the finale knowing what he likes best. If you can manage, I don't think there's a man who doesn't like to look into your eyes while you deliberately swallow his semen. If you're too shy for that, lean in and swallow next to his ear so he can hear you do so. Cheers, have fun!

>>18081809
That made me smile, I hope you marry a girl who is enthusiastic about oral sex some day. My name is legion etc :)
>>
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>>18081820
>This post
>>
>>18081820
If he moves my head with his hand is it safe to say I should just follow what hes doing?
>>
>>18081835
Depends, honestly I would just ask him in a non-sexual moment. It could be that he gets frustrated with teasing or you were doing something that doesn't work for him, it could also be that he just gets off on taking a more dominant position/it's just a way for him to blow off some steam and contribute. But I would ineed go with it for the time being, yes!
>>
>>18081796
>>18081811
>>18081820
Damn, that's hot.
>>
>>18080830
I don't think tinder would be a good idea.
>>
>>18081848
He is really really dominant and mostly does it when he gets close (the rest of the time he'll just have a hand resting on my head or carressing my hair) but sometimes he'll do it when I'm in the middle of licking the tip and stuff like that, do you think thats just a dom thing that turns him on (forcing my mouth on his dick) or does he not like licking that much? I definitely am gonna take your advice and ask, but I kinda wanna know what you think for the time being.
>>
>>18081001
how is this a question for the opposite gender?
>>
How do I find a woman in her thirties who is not a feminist?
>>
>>18081880
First thought is that it feels good and it frustrates him a bit to be "teased", he wants you to take it all in. Imagine him gently dipping the tip of his tongue against your pussy, if he kept at it you'd probably want to grind up against his face. I don't think it means that he doesn't like licking but more that it makes him want a stronger/more complete sensation (depends on the guy and his individual sensitivity whether they feel the shaft doesn't add much, or "deepthroating" as far as you can is the ultimate sucking). Probably a combination in that he also likes to push your head down but he wouldn't if what you did felt perfect to him. Probably feels really good but in a teasing way.

Also I realized I forgot to mention this but - not sure how ticklish his balls are exactly, but gently keeping them away from his shaft (you can easily do this by making a ring out of your fingers and keeping that around the base, also really useful for completing the sensation if you cannot actually take him all into your mouth, then your hands cover the final part so everything gets touched at least) feels quite good.
>>
>>18081895
Thanks for your help. Also, weird, I always did that thing you mentioned without even knowing if it felt good. Do you have any more tips on trying to be submissive other than begging and seeming shy? I dont have much experience being submissive (or even dominant, hes my first, but I used to consider myself more of a dom before him) so I'm not sure if theres more I could do. He already does stuff like asking me questions while we do it, saying im his, etc, but I was wondering if theres more I can do on my part?
>>
Why does it seem like most of the women I encounter are horny, selfish vixens? I know better than to think all women are like this, but why do I only come across the crappy ones?
>>
>>18081920
Where are you finding these women?
>>
Girls

What do you think of /r9k/?
>>
>>18081920
I thought being horny was good?
I don't know why theyre selfish. Maybe you're a conceited person and attract those people
>>
So a girl I met online, she acted very interested when we first met and now she ignores my message.

Why do you females do such things? It's torture.
>>
>>18081929
I met my boyfriend on there before it turned to shit, so it was pretty good when it was still people talking about sad stuff, but last time I checked it was full of 3d waifu threads (aka shit) and threads with girls trying to become the hottest new meme, or bbc threads. Once in a blue moon I'd actually see a good feels thread but theyd 404 fast with barely any posters.
>>
>>18081940
You can try /b/ for feels threads, but they're mostly going to be saved greentexts.
>>
>>18081929
To be avoided at all cost.
>>
Girls, be honest, do you sometimes check out /b/´s cock rate threads?
>>
>>18080890

is it not real? the only guy I've ever met whos entire psyche wasn't revolving around his sexuality is an asexual jew

I mean when scientists try to do studies on the effects of porn use they cant even get as far as finding a control group because they literally cannot find any men who dont watch porn and it seems to be a universal thing with men that if they don't jack off they feel like they're going insane and report "only being able to think straight" a few minutes after ejaculating
>>
>>18081932
>So a girl I met online, she acted very interested when we first met and now she ignores my message.

I'm a dude but.... Come on man. Just think about it for a second:

1.) They have no obligation to talk to you in the first place
2.) Would YOU force yourself to keep talking to someone you find out you're not interested in? That sounds like a drain.
3.) They're looking for people to be interested in, not waste time with people they're not.

Dating's a number game. If you catch yourself up in places that you don't like, you're never going to move forward to find the things that you do.
>>
>>18081927
In my day-to-day life
>>18081930
The realization they just want to get off and don't care about you kinda hurts
>>
How can I get my girlfriend to be more punctual with time?

>she says "let's talk I'll go to bed at 10"
>it's 10:30 and she isn't picking up the hints that I planned for the conversation to end at 10 like she said, and because of that I put all my social energy and conversation topics into the time before 10
>acts pissy when I suggest she go to bed since it's 10:40

>literally almost every time we do something she's late, doesn't apologize for it, and gets pissy when I'm annoyed about it
>I suggest she arrives early (or plans to) to ensure that she's on time
>even more pissy and gives bullshit "the woman should never be early for the man!" reponse

>"hey if you're gonna be late at least apologize for it"
>acts legitimately disgusted by the idea
>"OHHHH BUT YOU WERE LATE THAT ONE TIME!!"
>"yeah but I apologized for it"
>"oh"

>practically beg her to be 20 minutes early to something she absolutely needs to be there for
>she agrees
>she arrives 2 minutes before

I feel it's incredibly disrespectful and it's hurtful she doesn't consider it to be a big deal. The first thing I can understand as wanting to talk to me more, but she still didn't get the message I had planned the rest of my night according to the time she gave. The other things are just pure disrespect though.
>>
how to ask a girl you're not "friends" with but talk sometimes for a hug without making it awkward as fuck, everytime i get oneitis with some girl i fucking hate it overtime i noticed that i dont want sex or the girl to be my gf i just need hug or some kind of intimacy from the person i feel "attracted" to.
also not so ugly, if that matters
>>
>>18081981
No matter how you do it its gonna be weird unless she initiates it or she likes you, but at that point why not just make her you're gf? Thats just how shit works nowadays.
>>
>>18082002
your*
>>
>>18081981
just go in for a hug
either she okays it or she's repulsed by your presence
either way you know where you stand
>>
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>>18081961
That makes sense, it just feels like a huge part of me was with her and now it's gone since we don't talk anymore. I feel empty.

I should probably say it's the first time I've experienced someone being so interested or faking interest whatever, Thanks anon.
>>
>>18081088
Only very rarely. The only men I've been scared of were those who had a reputation with both genders for being creeps. I do get more aware if I'm out at night or at a party, but it's not like I'm on guard and assume all guys have bad intentions.
>>
>>18081967
Are you very attractive?
Stop going out with tinder sluts.
>>
>>18081092
I'd say most of us are aware of it, even in our teens. A lot of girls ignore this, and decide to party and date around. Sadly, a lot of women like me would like to settle down in our early to mid 30s. But we assume that most guys just want to date around, or will see us as crazy/ possessive if we express interest in marriage or a LTR.
>>
How do women feel about acne?(light to severe)
>>
How much of this is true?https://kennyspuathoughts.com/2013/11/24/why-youre-stupid-to-ever-trust-any-woman-to-not-cheat/
>>
>>18082005
to be honest I am almost 100% sure she would be fine with it if I asked but she's never alone and I fear rejection infront of people.
yes im a pussy..
>>
>>18082023
they honestly do not care if you dont
>>
>>18081497
Not really, but I haven't dated around much myself. My main concern wouldn't be about sex, since all couples start off from scratch with each other. I would be more worried about his inexperience dealing with relationship problems, if he was mature enough for a LTR, etc.
>>
>>18082007

You've got a long road in front of you anon. You'll experience much much worse.

But you'll also experience much much better, and good times will never be erased by the bad, and will become something you can carry forward and think fondly of.

If you have a mind for it, you can even use the bad times as opportunities to push yourself forward and kick start your personal growth.

If you don't keep try though, none of that will ever be found.

>>18082025
>How much of this is true?

Strike 1: Obvious click bait tagline
Strike 2: "PUA"
Strike 3: Article by a guy trying to sell you shit
Strike 4 (Are we even playing baseball anymore?): Literally says, "Where are the statistics? I have none"
Strike 5: Proceeds to offer his own "sex-perience" as "statistics" for why his claims are true

I stopped reading there.

Conclusion: Get the fuck out of here with that weak ass shit.
>>
Is getting pissed off and punching brick walls when I make a mistake on a calculus problem too unstable for most girls? It's not like I wear this shit on my sleeve or anything, but until I complete differential equations in a couple semesters I'm just going to feel like any other positive traits about me mean nothing and that I'm not worth the time of anyone of the opposite sex because I can't model enough mathematically.
>>
>>18081570
I would rather a guy be honest with me about this. Most of the guys I like/ liked didn't end up losing their virginity until adulthood, or are still virgins. Any girl who turns you down on the basis of this alone probably isn't a very nice person. There are so many different reasons a guy would still be a virgin, from being too busy to date, past girlfriends being religious , or just not knowing any girls that are his type. Also, telling a girl far beforehand will make it less awkward, because I guarantee if your girlfriend has any sexual experience, she'll know you're new to being down there.
>>
Why are females so stupid? Genuine question.
>>
>>18081189
>If you're not confident you could score and please any girl anytime
>etc etc you'll get cheated on
lmfao this is why I don't date

I have absolutely no ability to approach attractive girls, and I know that unless you're extremely alpha and can basically treat women as disposables and get away with it you're going to get cheated on.

Being an aware nerd sucks until you realize you have complete freedom by not being tied to acting in a manner to attract the opposite sex, I can literally spend all day outdoors or programming instead of spending money and drinking just to be able to fuck some slut so that I can say I'm more "experienced".
>>
>>18082011
>Are you very attractive?
I've been called handsome, cute, adorable, even a handsome devil by people other than my mom, so maybe.
>Stop going out with tinder sluts
I've never even used tinder
>>
>>18081978
I would bring it up directly, let her know she's being rude. Ask her why she's so blatantly disrespectful of your time. If you have somewhere to be, like in the first post, I would make it clear you have plans, say "I have to meet up with my friends, goodnight." As a girlfriend, I would honestly prefer this. Sometimes my boyfriend will say stuff like "aren't you tired" or "you're up late", instead of just saying he needs to go to sleep or go somewhere.

I do have to say though, you're probably not going to be able to change her bad habit very much. From what I've seen, most people get in the habit of timeliness when they are young kids, and carry that into adulthood. The only instances I've seen people really step up is when they risk losing their job. I know how shitty it feels to be treated this way. I had a boyfriend that would show up hours late or cancel, for every single date. You either have to accept the way she is, and make some adjustment like having her come to your place, or break up.
>>
>>18082023
Don't care, as long as you make an effort. I feel bad for guys I know who wash their face/ take meds and still have bad acne. Especially since I myself have not so great skin, but at least I have makeup to cover it.

I would be grossed out if I knew he didn't make any effort to take care of it. Considering the time and money I put in to cosmetics and such, he can spare $20 at the drugstore.
>>
>>18082025
>use techniques that select for women with low self-esteem and loose morals
>surprised you mostly interact with women with low self-esteem and loose morals

really makes you think
>>
>>18082054
To me yeah. But both the guys I know who have punched walls are kind of insane.
>>
>>18082054
Getting that mad about something trivial is not something any girl desires in a partner.

>I'm just going to feel like any other positive traits about me mean nothing and that I'm not worth the time of anyone of the opposite sex because I can't model enough mathematically.
No, none of your other positive traits mean nothing about you and you're not worth the time of anyone of the opposite sex because you are fucking nuts
>>
>>18082119
That's most women tbf.
>>
>>18081958
I'm in soc more than b but not really. Only time I looked in on one was when the OP picture was like, super odd looking. Like it was curved so bad it was almost 90% and I was like
"What the fuck? I gotta get a closer look at that shit"

So, I suppose that's not really the positive "mmm yeah thats a sexy looking dick" you were probably looking for.
>>
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>>18082119
Don't respond to the trolls plz.
>>
girls,
would you give out your number to someone you had no intention of following through with?

would some of you feel unable to say no, and just give out your number and then ignore someone because its more non confrontational?
>>
>>18082367
If I felt it'd get him off my back of if it was a situation where he was using something else as an excuse to get my number, then yes.
>>
>>18082369
no, this person point blank asked you if you wanted to meetup
>>
>>18082367
>would you give out your number to someone you had no intention of following through with?

Not a girl, but yes.

Hell I've done it to girls (and guys) too.

At the time it's not because I want to actively ignore them or anything, but more I just figure Eh, what's the harm in giving them my number, and hey, maybe I'll actually feel like talking again later.

And some times we do

But there are other times I'll get a text or something and just don't feel like responding at the moment because i'm busy with something else or I'm just feeling like I don't want to talk, or whatever, and this person was never high priority for me to begin with, so i ignore it for the moment, and it it sits there, and then I just end up completely forgetting about it
>>
>>18080878
Same here, friendo
>>
Is it weird to tell a girl she smells nice?
>>
So, I have my own place, a good job, a new car, and I'm fairly attractive (I Guess). But, I'm a late 20s virgin and I've not really had a gf. Am I a walking red flag, or should I stop worrying about my virginity.
>>
>>18082222

true but the goal of relationships is to weed out the 95% of disaster cases that is the human race

if you're mainly interested in casual sex don't be surprised you can't find any girls suitable for long term relationships
>>
Does anyone here have a partner/SO who is a bit of a space case?

I love my girlfriend but sometimes she just does not pay attention and it annoys me and sometimes makes me think she's dense. It upsets me because I don't want my respect for her to erode.
>>
>>18082222
Czeched
>>
>>18082496
Please respond
>>
Either gender help ASAP.

So, my reporting date for Jury Duty is now at the 30th of march. Now I'm new to this, but does that mean I successfully got excused or does that mean I still have to go on monday?
>>
Boys and Girls,

I have a younger female cousin (second cousin) who lives with me since she was orphaned 10 years ago. We both now in mid 20s and both never had GF/BF/serious relationship before.

It's slow, but I think I've fallen for my cousin since recently I don't want anyone else to be with her and afraid she'll get away from me. Should I confess and pursue relationship with her?

From her actions, she doesn't seem to be interested in getting a BF atm, since we've tried to introduce her to guys, yet she never picked any of them.
She's not rejecting my advances though. Every time we're both alone, she's behaving shyly, showing her vulnerability, always accepting my touch and she even let me kiss her forehead.
We even go out for a "date" recently, and not ounce she displayed any shame when walking with me.
The times she's nervous are when there's other people in house, like my mother or her younger sister, otherwise she don't mind if we're hugging each other.
>>
>>18082673
>Should I confess
Never "confess" to a girl god dammit. Real life isn't the fucking movies.

If you ever want to start something with a girl,no matter who it is, you ask her out to create a 1 on 1 situation like dinner at a restaurant. You joke,get flirty and ask her shit at the restaurant. Then when you're certain she's had a good time you make a move like a kiss.
>>
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>>18082673

What the fuck is up with all these kids trying to fuck their cousins these days?

Seriously? Out of all the girls in the world you just can't manage to steer clear of incest?
>>
>>18082496
>Is it weird to tell a girl she smells nice?
Like with anything else, it depends on the context, and the execution.

If you feel like you have to ask though, then the answer is more likely to be yes than no.

>>18082617
>So, my reporting date for Jury Duty is now at the 30th of march

Your reporting date is the date that they told you to report.

Which is the 30th of March.

>>18082673
>Should I confess and pursue relationship with her?

Up to you... it's legal pretty much everywhere. But "confessions" are pretty dumb in general and it's almost always better to just actually make a real action instead.
>>
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>>18082713
>You joke,get flirty and ask her
fuuuck this normie shit. No wonder I'm permanently single.
>>
>>18082713
>>18082728
It's legal and socially acceptable where I live. I also understand that real actions speak louder,
One time before it's getting like this, I even jokingly said she's my type of girl and wouldn't mind banging her all night. She's just awkwardly pout while saying she's wanted it too, hug me, then we back touchy-feely as I've described before. Of course it was before I'm falling to her, and have no intention to really have sex with her.

But this time for some reason it's different I'm really afraid of losing her. I'm hopelessly fall to oneitis syndrome. She's also not helping with accepting my advances.

>>18082725
I'm aware there's plenty of fish in the sea. I just can't help it. I wasn't even falling to my cousin until a year ago!
Back when she's in high school and university I even always encourage her to get a BF.

I'm not a virgin, lose it years ago to an escort. I also have 3 regular fwb for booty call. It's just I never set myself to serious BF/GF relationship with any of them.
>>
>>18082758
>It's legal and socially acceptable where I live
So you live in a muslim country? Consanguinity is most common in the muslim world.
>>
>>18082713
Not that anon.

I think what he and any other person means by "confession" is actually "clear things up", as in just bring up that you have feelings for somebody. Nothing overbearing, just very basic things like "I like you" or "I fancy you" and see what they say in return.

You may think this is stupid because you showing affection would be enough, but women can be really dense, plus knowing how we all carry a large portion of spaghetti in our pocket at any given time, I say it'd be better to be straightforward in a neutral fashion than to be trying to decipher ambiguous non-verbal language.
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Hey girls,
Should I apologise to a girl I had coffee with a few times and did a project with for drunkenly texting her a few months ago? and I sorta sent her a message yesterday asking how she was to no avail, as in 'seen'. I like her I was just really fucked up at the time
>>
>>18082760
Let's just say I'm asians, and not in middle-eastern countries. People in my city don't give a fuck if there's cousin couples.
Our church here even hold wedding for cousin couples twice recently.

>>18082766
>I think what he and any other person means by "confession" is actually "clear things up", as in just bring up that you have feelings for somebody. Nothing overbearing, just very basic things like "I like you" or "I fancy you" and see what they say in return.

Yes, that's what I have in my mind. Thank you for explaining it, anon.
I was gotta go and do that, but always stopped in track since I suddenly become afraid she'll reject me.
I never even has this feel when I go hooking up with my fwbs though. Has I been HEXed by her?
>>
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Girls:

How come when you're in a relationship with someone you never want to talk about how you feel when it's incredibly easy to see that's the number 1 most important thing to you?
>>
>>18082795
I second this question
>>
>>18082795
What?

>>18082772
If you drunkenly texted her months ago, now is not the time to apologise
>>
How do I ask her if it's a "relationship"?

I don't really want to give the whole novel breakdown but I feel like it's getting serious.
>>
>>18082799
Really? I kinda feel like she was weirded out especially when I messaged her yesterday
>>
>>18082806
She didn't even reply, apologising now would be worse than a 'pls respond'

>>18082805
Tell her you want to talk about exclusivity and shit
>>
>>18082812
"Exclusivity" sounds a little controlling...

Any other way I can phrase it?
>>
>>18082814
>"Exclusivity" sounds a little controlling...

Don't be a mister nice guy dumbass or you're get cucked
>>
>>18082814
I don't think it's controlling at all.
>>
>>18082773
Well whether she rejects you or not is exactly what you're trying to figure out, Anon. You want certainty, but it is possible that she certainly doesn't feel for you.

Ask, even when your stomach clenches to a knot.
>>
>>18082814
sorry nu male
>>
>>18082805
"Where do we stand with eachother?"
"What do you think about us?"
"Yo I'd hate it if somebody else puts his dick in you I'll stop putting my dick in others promise?"
>>
>>18082799
>What?
When you're the boyfriend of a girl the girl notedly flicks a switch to start turning down direct offers to talk about how they feel. Occasionally they'll come to the boyfriend but when the boyfriend tries to do it,they get shunned and ridiculed with the silent treatment when all they want to do is nuture the girlfriends feelings.

Why
>>
>>18082812
well I did it.
getting advice from a few people. If it doesn't work it doesn't work. So there is no way to get out of this dumb hole
>>
>>18082826
Boys and girls, I have another questions then. Why would she not reject my flirting and advances?

She could easily move away from house long ago before we're going on that date. She could've gone and fuck other guys she knows and was introduced too, long before I develop this feeling.
Even if she's felt indebted to my family, I don't see why she couldn't just walk away from me quietly. She's an independent adult with job and sizable saving. My parents never forbid her from goin if she wishes to.

Before I come to /adv/ I've talked to someone IRL, and they say. She's wanted me to make a move and be decisive. Is it true?
>>
>>18082728
How about when we hug? Should I mention quickly afterwards and say something along the lines of, "Wow, you smell really nice today" or something like that?
>>
>>18082843
>>18082843
???
>>
>>18082861
Think with your head, idiot. She's not yet in relationship because those guys are not willing to deal with her shit.

You're being taken advantage of by her.
>>
I've always treated girls bad, like other boys.
How should a man treat a woman regardless of his sexual interest in her? What things really make you go ''okay this guy has potential''?
>>
Girls: My friend probably isn't too annoyed with me groping her if she keeps hanging out and sleeping together with me, right?
>>
>>18082861
You sounds like a virgin. I'll give a benefit of doubt tho, since she's been living with you for years she might knows how to push your button and you got blinded of her bad side.
Either way you fall to her manipulation. Besides what kind of girl who never have a bf till her mid 20? A fucked up one who sane people avoid like plague
>>
>>18080810
My wife is still ugly. I thought maybe if I brainwash myself with some good old hypnosis that maybe I'd believe otherwise. Actually her severe ugliness has lead me to cuck her so hard with more ugly women because I figured why not? This is now getting out of hand because I've contracted stds from all the roastie sucking. Heeeeeeeelp!
>>
>>18083015
>How should a man treat a woman regardless of his sexual interest in her?
Appropriate to the context. Strictly professional in a business-setting. Your natural self (be it a bit withdrawn, or quite friendly and open) if you just meet as strangers and she's, for example, asking for directions. Pleasant if she treats you with respect. Curt/gruff if she's acting bitchy.

Honestly pretty much anything at all, from the situation you're both in to the chemistry between the two of you, is more significant for how you should behave than the bare fact that she's a woman and you're a man.

>What things really make you go ''okay this guy has potential''?
This is generally an individual thing, but for me it's mostly a combination of being engaging and showing me something about themselves. A guy catching me off guard with a joke, thoughtful remark or even just a little playful interaction catches my eye because it's like you're getting a glimpse at who this person really is beyond a first impression.
>>
>>18083073
Does she respond in any other way to the groping? If she doesn't react at all, it's pretty safe to assume that at least she gets nothing out of it and she's likely uncomfortable with it.

It's surprisingly awkward if someone you trust and like suddenly crosses a boundary, and a lot of people cope with that by rationalizing it to themselves. "This is how guys are, it means nothing" etc. That way they downplay it to themselves which gives them an excuse for not speaking up and creating that awkward situation.

Personally I've had a friend who pulled this and I did NOT like it, but the first two or so times I was too awkward and stunted to say anything, and after that I reasoned that technically it was my fault for not speaking up right away, and if I did it now and basically told him that he'd been doing stuff to me I didn't like at all for prolonged time, I was basically making it into his problem that I wasn't assertive because it would've never become an on-going thing had I spoken up right away. So I kept my mouth shut. To be fair I was sixteen at the time and especially socially stunted, but it's not unthinkable that she doesn't dare to stand up for herself but doesn't like it either.
>>
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Most people say my measurements are slightly above average, but this site states I'm above 90th percentile in all of them. The fuck?
>>
>>18083122
People have a completely stunted idea of how big an average dick is, both women (because they have no personal experience and men lie about it) and men (because they look at porn with 9" dicks all day). 5" to 5.5" is average. With 19 cm you are WELL above average, that's really big. Not for a pornstar, but for a given girl you'll be the biggest she's seen yet.
>>
girls

what would you rather want your bf to jerk off to?

Softcore or hardcore?
>>
Did I do the right thing?

My friend didn't respond to my text early in the week. So I messaged her "Hey, I just wanted to check in and make sure that everything is all right" she responded a few hours later with "I'm good, we had a rough call the other day" and "It was a call for a suicide, it was kind of rough"

I really couldn't say much to that, so I just said "Damn. I really can't say much beyond that I'll be here if you need to talk to someone"

I was gonna come clean with how I feel for her, but it didn't seem like it would be appropriate give the messages
>>
>>18083128
>Not for a pornstar, but for a given girl you'll be the biggest she's seen yet.
Cool, got a confidence boost. Thanks. Though since measurement is supposed to be taken from pubic bone the effective length is probably around 17cm due to the fat layer at the base.
>>
>>18083129
Softcore of course. I guess it doesn't matter if it's ultimately fantasy, but hardcore porn has virtually nothing in common with sex I actually like. It is both more promising and more arousing to imagine him getting off to things I actually enjoy, too.

If he just watched hardcore stuff all the time I'd worry a bit that he was the type of guy who just wanted to put it in after some tit groping and then jackhammer away. That's depressingly common nowadays.
>>
>>18083131
Still very big. You shouldn't take it seriously if girls talk about guys having had 8" dicks etc. As you can tell from this website those are incredibly rare, girls have no real frame of reference because virtually no guy is honest about his actual size, if you have a visibly above average dick and tell the girl in love with you that it's 8" you bet she won't doubt it. I feel this also fucks up people's idea of what's normal.
No problem, it's just factually true.
>>
>>18083130
Yeah absolutely. Pretty damn insensitive to follow up something like that with a declaration of your feelings. Besides she likely still wasn't 100% her old self.
>>
>>18083137
Yea. She really wasn't herswlf it seemed I can still tell it washer in the texts, but they were much colder and serious than usual.

On a side note, I am legitimately feeling like crazy just knowing what she went through
>>
>>18083139
Like crap knowing what she went through
>>
>>18083136
>You shouldn't take it seriously if girls talk about guys having had 8" dicks
Well I honestly never did. I just got confused since, especially on 4chan and online in general, people think 17-19cm is average tier.
>>
>>18083143
It just isn't. Not sure if it's a kind of machismo from guys that they want to believe men as a gender are crazily hung, or that they are sincerely confused because of porn proportions or whatever. There's been tons of research to dick sizes and the conclusions are very close together, no room for doubt.

Hell, not to discourage you because obviously you're much better off than being on the other half of average, but there's no way in hell all women can even take a 7" (let alone an 8") dick balls deep or suck it off comfortably. There's only so much a body can accomodate to.
>>
Girls: What does it mean if you tell a girl you're super-horny for her and she says she doesn't know how to deal with that yet?

I know that isn't a yes, but I don't know what to do with that phrasing.
>>
Question for both (but mostly girls).

Do you think it is true that "men love women more than women love men"?

No necessary talkig about about couples, but sometimes it seems like men overrall have a better opinion about women than woman overrall about men.
>>
>>18083149
My first thought is that she doesn't know whether she actually likes you enough to be interested, aka whether this is exciting news for her or something she wants nothing to do with personally.

But you need to provide more context here. Have you been dating? How long/well do you know each other? Was this the first ever non-platonic thing you did/said to her (please say it isn't)?
>>
>>18083150
I'm 100% not trying to be condescending, but how can you honestly think men hold women in such high regard on this website? You don't even have to hop over to /r9k/ to see men talk about women like useless talking fleshlights who are only worth being around if they're literally around your dick.

So NO. Nor do I think it's the other way around, for the record, but absolutely not true.
>>
>>18083154
>but how can you honestly think men hold women in such high regard on this website?

I don´t, but I am talking about men IRL.

I have heard many times guys sayin stuff like "I love women" or "women are the best part of my life", but I have never heard women saying something like that about in general (only about specific men in their lives)
>>
>>18083146
Yeah I've had some problems with pain with my partners in the past. At least I'm pretty good at foreplay and learned to enjoy foreplay a lot, because of aforementioned problems with pain, though even if she's completely ready I can still sometimes cause discomfort.

I don't mind that she can't take it all into her mouth, the glans and areas near glans like frenulum are the most comfortable and sensitive anyway.

>>18083154
You're a victim of comfirmation bias.
>>
>>18083153
We're not dating. She's one of my close friends and we've known each other for aFew years. Not really the first non-platonic thing I've said, and we've made out a few times and gotten each other once. It's just that I considered all of that platonic.
>>
>>18083155
I meant, [while also being] on this website. Sure this site draws a certain crowd but it's not like these men do not exist in real life as well.

To be fair, I have heard women say that, but they say it to me as their female friend. If they said it with guys around they would be labeled dicksluts. Men are typically not that comfortable with women loving men as a gender, as opposed to individual persons.

For what it's worth, I fucking love men. Of all ages, races and appearances. I find it endearing when I walk behind a teenager and see that self-conscious slope in his posture, or that lanky spring in his step. It turns me on when I see men discreetly fix their jeans so they sit more comfortably. I love the sort of youthful, boyish energy they often have: the jokes, the whistling, the tapping on stuff, how much they love games and flashy toys. I love their hairy bodies, whether they have that singular inverted V-line from the shoulders to the hips, or that pudged out look of a man who is beyond giving fucks about trim physique and know that's not where his sex appeal lies. If I can choose between sitting next to a woman or a man on the train, you bet I'll sit next to a man. Hell, 90% of the reason I come here despite it making me sad how everyone talks about women is because I can look inside the minds of men, read their unfiltered thoughts.

But even privately telling a tenth of this to a trusted male friend I get a weird look and a joke about how I need to get laid.
>>
>>18083158
*each other off
>>
>>18083157
For what it's worth, you can buy these donut-shaped things that allow you to pound away while not going balls deep, so you don't have to hold yourself back and she's not in pain. But it will depend on the woman, some just have longer vaginas than others (this is regardless of them all becoming deeper with arousal).

>confirmation bias
I don't think this is the average male opinion on women, hence including that I don't think women like men more than vice versa, either. But these are real people airing their opinions and whether or not it's the majority, it does make clear that men do not necessarily love (or well, I don't count a hate/love relationship as love) women as a whole (huge) group.
>>
>>18083163
I see, seems like good reason for it.

I am sorry if my question seemed accusatory or offensive, that´s was not my intention.
>>
>>18083158
Sounds to me like she kind of mindlessly went with that stuff in the heat of the moment, and your comment made her reconsider whether she would actually want to have a more serious sexual (or even romantic) relationship with you.
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>>18083168
>But these are real people airing their opinions and whether or not it's the majority, it does make clear that men do not necessarily love (or well, I don't count a hate/love relationship as love) women as a whole (huge) group.
You're correct, but they are not the majority, just like men-hating pink-haired crazies are the majority of women. They're the majority of /r9k/ etc., but I don't think men on /adv/ necessarily are woman-hating faglords.
>>
>>18083171
Not offensive, no worries, I just run into this kind of thought a lot (that women don't really like men) and it exasperates me a bit because I know for a fact it's not true.

Another variation on this is the whole idea that women don't make art about men etc... also depressingly common despite not being true. Cue gorgeous example, one of the best love songs ever written (also by her) if you ask me: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_OtHVLAF4o
>>
>>1808317
aren't the majority of women*
>>
>>18083163
Not who you're talking to, but it sorta warms my heart a little reading that. I feel that way-or an analogous way-about women, and I honestly kinda thought it was a one-way street and that no girl felt that way about guys. Kinda made my day there.
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What qualities would your ideal partner have?
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>>18083168
Oh forgot to ask about those donut things. Do they have a specific name? I'd like to look into them.
>>
Is a 28 year old virgin a red flag?
>>
>>18083177
I'm not too worried about it, I've been lucky enough to have known some pretty amazing men in my life. But I have to point out that I used to think like this ("this is a niche group, no one who's in a less extreme position thinks like this") but in the last few years I sometimes worry.

It can kind of seem like men do not take women seriously in any way. Any hobby that is regarded as feminine is seen as dull. Saying that someone does something "like a girl" is an insult all by itself. A female politician is in an impossible position because any of the female tropes - matronly/motherly, virginal, sexy, schoolteacher - detract from her appeal. Not to mention more practical stuff like needing to be trained to speak with a lower voice - basically, everything to seem as little like a woman as possible.
There are virtually no female actors who are not more or less conventionally attractive. Once they are over forty, they are even more destined to play a supporting role of the bland mother/partner. Simply having an older woman or a physically imperfect woman as the main character is enough for a film to be considered mildly artistic.
Not to mention how deadly afraid men are of being perceived as feminine, to the point where they even need to come up with terms like "man-bun" to differentiate with the most trivial shit.

Again, I've known some stellar fucking men so I have no doubt that men are 100% capable of taking women seriously in real life. It just sometimes feel like a lot of them hold some level of contempt for femininity as a concept.
>>
>>18083192
Correction:
Is a 28 year old virgin male a red flag?
>>
>>18083192
Virgin past 20 should be the red flag for both. For men, with abundance of escorts and brothels, that's just unthinkable. For women it's kinda complicated, but when she's past 20 and still not in relationship, something must be wrong with her to make her undesirable.
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>>18083178
I am going to admit something however, I did use to see women in a negative light, mainly because my mom was (and still is) and that let me a very bad impression of women and relationships in general (also my dad was physically abusive towards me maybe because of this, and my mom never cared).

But that´s a thing of the past, as I have interacted more with women (college classmates mainly) my opinion on them changed drastically for the better, I have come to love them, and still am a little scared of getting a gf (since I have no idea how a functional relationship is suppossed to be), but I hope will get there someday.

In any case, I think women are great now.
>>
Girls

If you were hanging out with a guy friend and he put his arm around you in a flirtatious way. If you DIDNT want that. How would you react? Would you be upset with him, or would you just sort of step away and not make it into a big deal?

Basically, I like one of my female friends. I hold a lot of respect for her, so I don't want to make her uncomfortable, but I would like to show I'm interested
>>
>>18083191
I just googled around a little, I only ever heard them described as dick donuts. On amazing there are several things that seem like they fit the description - they are called cockrings there, though, but they seem much thicker than the rings typically are.

Also found this: http://sexuality.about.com/od/glossary/g/penis_limiter.htm
>>
Me and my gf are virgins and both 21. She seems to be hinting towards having sex a lot and I've been denying it since I think it's too soon (only been dating 7 months). But a really like her and don't want her to feel like I don't think she's attractive because I think she's really pretty and I really do want to have sex.
>>
>>18083185
Hahaha, absolutely not. I understand feeling that way because this perspective isn't really represented as much in society, but I know from having had many female friends throughout life that this is absolutely not rare. Not everyone is equally crazy about men as a group just as the other way around, but there are absolutely plenty women walking around who (like me) love the littlest details even if solely because they only associate them with men.

Also, dat incredible contrast when men as the bigger and typically more assertive sex get all cutesy with kids or animals, that gentle giant idea. Incredible. As is the contrast between male sexual bravado and the sort of helplessness and vulnerability of the reality of a horny guy in your bed you're pleasing well.
>>
>>18083207
>(only been dating 7 months)
>7 months
>too soon

Holy shit anon, just bang her already, it´s just sex, it´s as if you are getting marry already.
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>>18083207
Why do you think it is too early after 7 months?
For most it'd be a really long time.
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>>18083199
Sorry to hear that, that's quite something to put behind you. But I feel you there, my dad also complicated my relationship with men, but in his case because he could both be the sweetest dad in the world and put in everything he had to make me cry when he was frustrated (often not even with me), so that's a really weird sort of Stockholm syndrome where the person you love and who loves you also hurts you so much.

Anyway, everyone has bagage and you can work through things, even if it often enough doesn't feel like that. But given the rest of your post I think you already had a taste :)
>>
>>18083214
*it´s not as if
>>
>>18083214
>>18083215
I grew up expecting to wait for marriage(my parents did too) and even though I might not I still want to be really sure about this girl.
>>
>>18083221
Dude almost no one waits till marriage, I bet your granny already had at least one dick inside of her at 20.

Dont worry dude, is just sex, if she waited this long means she really likes you and wants you, just do it.
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>>18083221
Then tell her you're waiting till marriage and that's entirely the reason why you aren't having sex with her. You can eventually pretend you changed your mind later on.
Otherwise you'll make her feel like the reason why she isn't getting sex is because she's unworthy of it (which is the case, since you're not really sure about her as you said).

Also - either wait till marriage or don't. This "I'm waiting till marriage but not really because whatever" bullshit is stupid.
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>>18082991
>>18083091
Why she being single in her 20s made you assume that? She's just a shy and reclusive person, and I know well she's not seeing any guys behind our backs. I can even count with my fingers the times she gone out on weekends

I know that I'll have to confront her 1:1 soon, just clearing up things. Whatever her answer is it'll at least ease my burden. It's just the first time I have to advance with reclusive girl. My hookups before are always outgoing extroverted gals.
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>>18083207
>Me and my gf are virgins and both 21.

So if you're not ready, you're not ready. Period.

But instead of dicking around with "hints" you should probably have a real, adult conversation about this, because you're both old enough and deep enough in to this relationship that you should be able to hold one.

Don't take it for granted that she can read your mind.
>>
>>18083217
One last thing I want to say, it might sound silly but I think this threads have also helped me with that, I think I understand women a little better from some answers I have gotten here in the past few weeks.

Thanks to all the femanons here for being so nice even if we sometimes ask dumb questions <3
>>
>>18083130
So what could I do from here?
>>
What to do if there is a language barrier and cultural differences with gf? I'm American and she's korean, we both like each other a lot but for example i had my hand on her ass half the night on our most recent date (and she put it there) but she still won't kiss me. We also have trouble finding things to talk about, and one of the only things we have in common is crippling alcoholism.
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>>18083154
>I'm 100% not trying to be condescending, but how can you honestly think men hold women in such high regard on this website?
I think you're not taking into consideration the main population of the website. Specifically, sexually frustrated men in their early 20s or even teens. This is where they vent. It's not indicative of what the average man thinks.

I looked at a former friends tumblr, and the people she reblogged or whatever the fuck it's called. Full of whining men aren't into fat women, but that fat women aren't obligated to date fat men. Unironic male tears mugs. Talking about how they want to take down toxic masculinity, but laughing at men who show weakness or frustration.

Should I base my opinion on women off the shit this woman posts, and the people she seems to agree with? Nah. They're frustrated and venting, because they fucking hate their life. It's easier to vilify others than to look in the mirror.
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>>18083255
I worded it a bit sloppily, I don't think men on here are an indicator for how the average man thinks as much as I wanted to point out that the fact that these crowds exist already disproves that all men are very fond of women.
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>>18083261
>I wanted to point out that the fact that these crowds exist already disproves that all men are very fond of women.
I think a lot of it is a case of sour grapes though, for both parties I described.

Using the former friend I mentioned as an example, all of it can be traced back to her waiting around for a felon junkie bf, even after he went back to jail. Even though everyone told her to move on for ages, she ended up rationalizing it as men being horrible, rather than her making a series of profoundly terrible decisions. Fast forward a few years and she basically became an internet stereotype rather than own up to her shit. For men, it's less taxing to call women worthless than to own up that you may be doing something really fucking stupid.
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>>18083278
I agree in the most extreme cases, but if we're discussing it anyway, it does sometimes discourage me that there seems to be a disdain for things female sometimes, culturally. See what I detailed in >>18083193

Another example is that all my male friends are normal, pleasant guys who are socially adjusted, have always had friends, girlfriends, flings and so on. Yet I've known them since high school and without exception they went through a phase where they did the whole "bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks" thing, and complimented me and other girls in the clique by saying that we "basically were men" (because we weren't vapid bitches). Again, that's regular guys who did not go on any sexist website, who got laid (and respected their girlfriends), in a European country that is otherwise particularly "equal" politically and in terms of household responsibility etc.

Sure my friends could be mean about individual guys especially as teens, or make dumb jokes about guys just wanting sex. But not the whole phase of looking down on men. Even in the year 1999 or whenever Harry Potter came out, JK Rowling was advised against using her female first name because boys would sneer at reading a female author.

And it's not like 4chan is the only place (anymore, it seems to be more rampant lately in my eyes), even on youtube you find unhinged comments under the most normal videos.
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Is it possible to flirt over Facebook?
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Guys and girls, how do you feel about being seen nude by opposite sex relatives?
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>>18083287
>See what I detailed in >>18083193
I have a few issues with that. For instance consider a news anchor and a female presidential candidate both lied about being under sniper fire. Only one of them had their career destroyed over that lie. Call it benevolent sexism if you want, but women are able to get away with a lot of stupid shit. Additionally, yes there are unattractive male actors. But 90% of the time they're comic relief. You're not going to see Steve Buscemi as the heart throb lead in a romantic comedy any time soon. Hollywood is vain, hell the entire region down there is.

>Yet I've known them since high school and without exception they went through a phase where they did the whole "bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks" thing, and complimented me and other girls in the clique by saying that we "basically were men" (because we weren't vapid bitches). Again, that's regular guys who did not go on any sexist website
Just sounds like frustration over the antics of teenagers to me to me. I've heard women say all men want is sex all the time, and I don't see how that's all that much better than saying women just jerk you around. As people have matured it's been ages since I've heard rhetoric like that from either sex.

>it seems to be more rampant lately in my eyes
I have the sense people are becoming frustrated.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzA4dCT4X0I
This happened pretty close to me actually, and as people get deeper into identity politics and the idiocy that requires, the only appropriate answer is "fuck off". Naturally there will be a lot of collateral damage.
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>>18083305
Definitely, but be aware that those who're receptive to that approach nowadays are either looking for easy lay, catfishing, scamming, or desperate people.

>>18083319
Full frontal? If by older relatives, it never happens to me, but I think we'll just laugh it off. If by someone closer to my age, it'll feel awkward and let's be honest it potentially also create an uncomfortable sexual tension.
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>>18083287
If it makes feel any better, as someone that has made those kind of comments, we don´t always mean it.

The truth is that men are more insecure that women think, we feel like we have to pretend to be strong and give no fucks all the time so we say things like that in order to look "badass" and "in control"

Not excusing the fact that many men do thing like that, just pointing out sometimes we are not being assholes, just dumb.
>>
How I appeal to girls with a lot of better-looking, more outgoing guy friends?
Should I just hope I happen to be her type?
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>>18083319
I would feel embarrassed but not because of the nudity itself, but because I am a little overweight and have a small dick.

If I had a fitter body and a bigger dong I would be naked as much as I could lmao, I love nudity.
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>>18080810
Guys, am I being flirted with and how do I respond?

This is someone I work with but before we worked together we met in a nightclub and kissed. We spoke for a while and then had a political argument and stopped, I then moved offices to his place of work and we talked a bit, he said I was "prettier than he remembered", we then met for coffee randomly a few weeks later because we were both in town and after that he went cold on me and said he didn't think he wanted to be involved with someone he works with and that I get "very dramatic very quickly". Other than the political disagreement I don't see where he decided this, I'm assuming he seen me up close/spoke to me irl and decided I wasn't his cup of tea.

Luckily we work in seperate departments and have not spoke since, he has to walk past my desk and sometimes looks at me and pulls an awkward face.

Anyway, we ran into each other in the kitchen at work and it was uncomfortable. I messaged him asking why it's always so awkward.

>tl;dr hooked up with a guy and a few weeks later worked at his office, he turned me down but now we're talking and Idk what to make of it.
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>>18083344
We are both sort of awkard irl.
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>>18083325
>benevolent sexism
Nah, it's just sexism. I am well aware that women get lighter sentences for the same crimes and that should be below the dignity of any self-respecting court. But that doesn't negate anything I said. I wasn't trying to argue that sexism is a one-way street, just that I do see a pattern in femininity (irrespective of individual people, talking about concepts here) being often portrayed as silly/boring/negative.

>But 90% of the time they're comic relief.
No denying that, people are shallow and want to look at pretty people. But it's not as strongly a prerequisite to look "normal and handsome" if you're talented as an actor. Actors like Adam Driver and Benedict Cumberbatch are regarded as talented and sexy despite having obvious unorthodox looks. Compare that to Nathalie Dormer being used as the token "quirky looking" girl - a gorgeous woman who happens to have one striking "imperfect" detail in her face. Or it being more common for movie couples to have a real life age difference of ten to thirty years than to be age peers, because for whatever reason people don't want to look at even a pretty middle aged woman playing a bigger role in mainstream cinema.
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>>18083344
>>18083346
Regardless if he is flirting with you or not I'd advise you to not get too close to him. He seems like bad news.
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>>18083338
>girls with a lot of better-looking, more outgoing guy friends

She seems to be a kind of girl who will always be constantly testing guys, or in need of constant stream of validation. I don't know why you should bother with this type.

If you insist, discover her thumbscrew, this type of girls will have 'a missing piece' she'd like to discover. That piece could be anything, but not limited to material wealth. If you could give it, she's all yours
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>>18083348
>frustration over the antics of teenagers
Nah, honestly by the time it dawned on me that this behavior was pretty shitty, they had long outgrown it. When it happened I was too insecure myself to fret more about this than about fitting their standards. What does stand out to me in hindsight is that this level of animosity towards women was present in my friends who were by all means good kids - I wasn't friends with the guys who bragged on facebook about taking a girl's virginity for the whole world to see, or spiked girls' drinks, which happened as well.

And just look at Trump's presidency, yeah sure most Americans don't actually support him and his choices, but none of his degrading comments/behavior towards women was enough of a dealbreaker for the man to be come the most powerful person in the world. Can you imagine the equivalent? Hillary Clinton being caught on tape making condescending comments about men and most people going "eh, it's harmless girl talk"?

I'm half-way through the video and it's some terribly cringe-worthy shit, but I don't really see how you can say that outlier incidents of extreme feminists are enough to push men to the edge of their patience with women when a man who acts like Trump has been voted literal president. There is quite a scale difference there.

And for the record, I'm not trying to say that sexism towards women is worse or whatever. Men commit suicide more often, have weaker support networks, the jobs that traditionally went to men are most at risk for being industrialized and/or outsourced. Men are at a higher risk for becoming homeless, addicted or going to prison. They have much weaker rights as a father. As a non-American it absolutely baffles me how much of a non-issue male genital mutilation is in the US.

All I'm saying is that in culture, which is on many grounds hardly the first worry/priority, there is more respect (although not kindness, or attention) for men than for women.
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>>18083348
>Or it being more common for movie couples to have a real life age difference of ten to thirty years than to be age peers
Hollywood in general has an issue with age. Enders Game comes to mind as a recent example. In so many words you're going to have a bad time if you're expecting any level of artistic integrity from them.
>>
to;dr Is going on a double date as a first date a bad idea?

I'm in college, and I like this girl, I've talked to her a couple times, got her number etc. Her best friend likes one of my friends, and I was thinking seeing if they wanted to do something together.
Sadly I'm not well versed in real dating, most interactions with girls occur drunk at parties, but I actually like her and want to try for real.
Is this a good idea?
>>
>>18083375
If she's not comfortable unless her friend's also coming with her, it's not a bad idea. The key is after you meetup you have to try to go separate way from the other couple.

If she's comfortable without her friend coming, just two of you, just do a normal date.
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>>18083359
>Can you imagine the equivalent? Hillary Clinton being caught on tape making condescending comments about men and most people going "eh, it's harmless girl talk"?
Sure, none of it was directed towards men really. But the woman laughed about how a rapist got off scot free, and called the women Bill was involved with floozies and bimbos. If we're going to bring up stupid comments made during candid talk, she's not really your best candidate.

>but I don't really see how you can say that outlier incidents of extreme feminists are enough to push men to the edge of their patience with women when a man who acts like Trump has been voted literal president. There is quite a scale difference there.
I used that as an example because of how it blew up. If you're a Euro it may not have reached there really. When you live next to a liberal city, it's a very common thing to watch feminists and communists and all sorts of other retards harass people because of perceived slights especially on a college campus. Are most women like that? Fuck no, of course not. But watching people unironically bitch about manspreading kind of makes you take issues about sexism a lot less seriously.
>>
Most my friends have moved from my city and those who still lives here, have no interest in going out to a bar. How do I make friends with people at a bar without being awkward?
>>
Girls, do you think any guy has chance with you?

What I mean is, is it possible for any guy in the world to make you fall for him if he does the right things, or do you think that there are guys that will never ever get you no matter what?
>>
>>18083381
Any tips on how to know what she'd prefer? Or should I just straight up ask if she wants to bring her friend and my friend and see what she says?
>>
>>18083359
Jesus, women are stupid.
Kill yourself.
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>>18083387
No, absolutely no.
I wouldn't date an ugly guy. I wouldn't date someone much more stupid than me. I wouldn't date someone who is radically different form me in terms of views on life and such.
There are a ton of other personality flaws which are dealbreakers for me.

I don't fall for a guy who "does the right thing", I fell for guys who were right for me. They didn't have to do much, they were just right for me.
>>
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>>18083353
>Discover her thumbscrew
>thumbscrew

>Google that

>It's a torture device
Are you saying he should blackmail her
>>
>>18083384
>stupid comments made during candid talk
It wasn't a one off for Trump. It's not just the grab 'em by the pussy stuff, he can attack a woman interviewing him for probably "oozing blood", while aware that people will hear it, and there's no fucks given.
I also don't really think her calling Bill's mistresses names is a fair example. Yeah it's hypocritical but psychologically not that weird to feel more one-sided hatred for the third party than for your own partner, who betrayed you more directly and personally but also did many things for you and already has a bond with you.

>how a rapist got off scot free
Not really sure what this refers to but it's the first time I've heard it and I did follow the biggest scandals up to the election.

Yeah it's hard for me to judge what the situation is like overseas. But I also read comments from Americans saying that stuff like that is only an issue on tumblr and not in the real world, except for very rare instances.
And no, I absolutely have never heard anyone bitch about manspreading in my life. A friend of mine is a feminist (I guess I technically am, but have too much criticism on the way the feminist movement operates and the amount of energy they invest into male dominated problems to identify with the movement) who does gender studies and while we were having a discussion on feminism at some point I mentioned manspreading as an example of idiotic tumblrfeminism. She had literally never heard of it and when I explained it she looked at me like I was retarded and very slowly said that she was pretty sure it was a joke/satire because no sane person would waste time thinking about that.
>>
>>18083388
Just straight up ask her if she's want to go withjust two of you first. If she retaliates, then ask her if she's wanna bring her friend.
>>
>>18083204
Nice, thanks anon
>>
>>18083414
Just reread my post and obviously meant to say *Amazon...

But you're welcome, hope it proves useful!
>>
>>18083400
I mean it as a figure of speech, but yes why not?

That kind of girl in my experience need a more extreme method to get more trouble than worth. That's why I said he shouldn't be bothered to pursue her.
>>
>>18083421
>but yes why not?
Well not only does it sound life ruining it's also easier said than done. Especially with this guy who apparently is just trying to appeal and i'm guessing hasn't already bedded her so he can't just accidentally knock her up and hope she's a good mother-type.
>>
>>18083408
>But I also read comments from Americans saying that stuff like that is only an issue on tumblr and not in the real world, except for very rare instances.
Maybe at their college. But if you're so inclined just google some of the antics at say, PSU.
>>
I have a question but let me tell you my story first.

The yearly fair is in my town and i saw a girl playing on one of those machines that drops coins and tickets and was very attractive to me, i tried to go talk to her but then i saw her talking to an older guy probably 25 years older, i was not sure if he was her dad or her bf so i didnt go and regret it now

My question is should i have approached her even if the chance was there he was her bf?
>>
>>18083507
Just do it, if she is taken she is taken, no more to do.
>>
>>18083526
I will remember your words if it ever happens again, thank you.
>>
>>18083507
Chance taken and ended in failure is more satisfying than chance not being taken.
>>
If my obviously very heterosexual male friends say I'm handsome and call me things like "Fabio" from time to time, does that mean I'm downright hot?
>>
>>18083570
That is also a very good one i will remember.
>>
>26 male
> cute Peruvian close female friend of 10 years goes through depression
>I relate and show her there's more to life and it gets better
>20yo gf of 6mo gets super jealous and wants me to stop talking to MY DEPRESSED FRIEND WHO RECENTLY MADE AN ATTEMPT ON HER LIFE
>nearly lose my shit to her being ignorant and not being able to comprehend my want to help friend
>I lost a close friend to depression
>fuckedmeup.jpg
>tell gf I refuse to lose another friend to it.
>she's mostly jealous cuz of content ie "it gets better, you will have a mansion and you can invite me. I'll invite you to my private island. You're incredibly strong etc"
>fast forward couple months.
>friend hits me up frequently asking about my gf if were together still
>delete texts from friend cuz gf made it clear that she'd leave me if I talk to her.
> see friend to get drinks in Hollywood
While my gf thinks I'm at work
>I lied to her ima pos
>friend knows gf is crazy, has me break up w her for at least a day so I can be single
>she texts my gf as me
>Peru friend is there w her gal pal, we drink and end up at gal pals place to spend the night
>friend and I have to share the couch
>end up cuddling together topless falling asleep
>beautiful af slender and athletic (also my best friends ex) and my heart melts cuz she is also like 50lbs lighter than gf im still a pos.jpg
>Peru girl is sad i didn't drink with her the next night, her gal pal said I fucked up by not going
>gf gave me glorious make up sex
>should I become single or stay committed because i probably have a fear of being alone and nobody will love me the same
>ended an 8yr relationship 14 months ago so I don't want to get stuck in another long term relationship with no future

Tldr:
Should I be in a relationship with semi crazy gf who expects me to check in when I'm home or at work or with friends/ expects me to tell her whove I been talking to, but she also is a loving but I feel like I'm being manipulated
Or break up and mingle?
>>
>>18083621
I'd honestly kill myself if I had to deal with a hyper-controller.
>>
>>18083621
I don't understand like half of your greentext. You lied to who about being pos? Pos what? Who did you cuddle with on the couch? Why did you tell empty shit like "you'll have your own private island" to a depressed girl?
>>
>>18083122
Are you black?
>>
>>18083681
No, I'm born and raised to native parents with no outsider genes in an unspecified Northern European country.
>>
>>18083639
I lied to my gf by saying I'm at work and I haven't talked to Peru chick.

It was a platonic relationship for the longest time and only felt like shes been dropping hints of interest.
Nearly every one of my guy friends shes met she's rejected respectfully
She's wifey material that I don't want to fuck up on
She's not slutty as far as I know
There's never been anything sexual between us, maybe some tension buildup but recently her concern for my relationship status has been of question.

I spent the night on the couch with Peru girl. She got uncomfortable and took her shirt off, she said my dress shirt and undershirt were bothering her and took it off me. She then took off her bra and I was speechless as she nuzzled back into my arms and we drifted into sleep on the floor
her tiddies were A+ a cups

Current gf and I spend every waking moment together other than work school and sleeping
I could consider it toxic seeing as we spend too much money on weed food movies snacks more food with me usually paying. Hardly any activities that help us grow or promote healthy lifestyle
We both have nearly unused gym memberships and have been hiking 2wice

Part of me wants to make things work the other part of me is like shes too young and emotional idk
What do I do
>>
>>18083639
I was trying to make her smile by being cheesy and hopeful
She knows I spoke figuratively I was trying to relate to her, she knows I went through he'll when my 8yo relationship fell through, she helped me get with the ex, a friend to both of us, and she was there when it ended. As I have done for her.
I hope that cleared it up
I can't believe I'm asking 4chan for advice lol thanks
There's a first time for everything
>>
>>18083701
>>18083716
Sounds like the Peruvian wants you, though it's hard to say since I'm not you. I guess you need to ask yourself if you really want to stay with your current gf.
>>
>>18083681
Why do you care if big dicked anon is or is not black?
>>
>>18083716
You always have 2 roads in life and you should pick the one that will give you the best memories, meaning you should pick what your heart says.
>>
Girls

Do you view virgins as being less mature?
>>
>>18083734
What message do you think she was trying to send?
What Do you think her intentions are from a female perspective?
What kind of chance do you think i have?
Relationship chance? Possibility of hooking up?
Am I fucking retarded for not making a move that night?
Am I reading too much into things?
Am I some ungrateful dick that is not appreciating what I have?
Am I the ignorant controlling freak In my relationship and I can't even see it?
Am I so niieve that I can't take a hint from a half naked tipsy girl in my arms?
>>
>>18083757
I like this.

You're perspective on life are memories and experiences are what is most important.

Why should I be in a relationship when the memories I have are of smoking fucking and eating which are great but already experienced.

True I want adventure and growth and progress and trust with loyalty of course.

Also the girl from Peru is moving alone to dc in June, and it's hard for me to accept it.
Does that give me more of a reason to act or to remain silent?
>>
>>18083631
God it's suffocating sometimes and prefect when you're feeling down
>>
>>18083788
>What message do you think she was trying to send?
That she wants you to quit being a relationship she finds damaging to you and wants you to ask her out and then fuck her.
>What Do you think her intentions are from a female perspective?
I'm not a woman so I can't comment on that.
>What kind of chance do you think i have?
Based on what I read you probably have good chances but kind of fucked up by not drinking with her the second night.
>Am I fucking retarded for not making a move that night?
I can produce a lot of arguments why you should've and should've not done a move. On the other hand she probably likes you a lot and you could've gotten sex, but on the other hand if you did a move on her, you'd brand yourself a cheater.
>Am I reading too much into things?
Overthinking is never good.
>Am I some ungrateful dick that is not appreciating what I have?
Based on what I've read thus far I would also be in a crossroads since your relationship sounds pretty bad. I hate over-controlling behaviour.
>Am I the ignorant controlling freak In my relationship and I can't even see it?
Do you tell your gf to tell you who she's been talking with and to check in on you when she's at X place?
>Am I so niieve that I can't take a hint from a half naked tipsy girl in my arms?
I would have not made a move personally, even if the hint was clear as day.
>>
>>18083816
I expect her to comply with her own demands. If she expects me to tell her whom ive spoke with, Id like to know as well. Text her when I'm home, okay reasonable I'd expect the same.
But then there's
"Why haven't you told me that Ruth texted you 20 minutes ago. "It was about selling bud, something I didn't even respond to and questions our relationship and my love for her. I ask if she's talked to anyone and she has but hasn't told me yet and I ask why she's going off on me if she hasn't let me know about her guy friends she's talked to yet. She's says it's not about her right now why am I always making the issue about her instead. She says I don't love her because I forget to tell her things that have no importance to me but are important to her. I understand where she's coming from
She says it's childish of me to expect from her what she expects from me. Like I'm only doing it or asking her cuz she does it.

Tell me if I am being unreasonable

God i feel like I have nothing good to say about her but she's great sometimes too
She's a bit psycho and controlling which definitely outweighs her loving caring sexual side.
10 is the worst she can get and I've almost lost it in craziness.
7ish is the max I feel loved and cared for that is without feeling manipulated
Idk pretty fucked up shit I'm in.

God I'd love to be with the Peru chick but I haven't really received any sure signals or even clear hints
Other than her breaking us (my gf and i) up and sleeping nearly nude in my arms after a night of secretive drinking
???? Fuck me
>>
>>18083891
Just tell her what you feel and want more from her, even if she says she does not you can congratulate yourself.
>>
>>18083891
>I expect her to comply with her own demands.
>She's says it's not about her right now why am I always making the issue about her instead.
>She says it's childish of me to expect from her what she expects from me
The saying goes something like "you should live as you preach"...

These are typical manipulator tactics, run off the mill shit, but you probably know that already given that you acknowledge being a victim of a manipulator. You are not being unreasonable. She just makes you feel unreasonable through a myriad of manipulative tactics that make you feel like you're the aggressor. If she's that manipulative it's also very likely that she lies to you either directly or by omission about various things.

Do >>18083951 if you want to see where the Peruvian road leads, because I think that your relationship with the manipulator is a dead end either way.
>>
>>18082254
Soc?
Are you in the Los Angeles area?
I lurk Soc often
>>
>>18083951
Tell the chick from Peru or my gf?

God the Peruvian girls mother loves me she's like a second mother and she makes the most delicious ethnic food
Mmm damn. It killed me inside a bit and I resented my girl for a bit when she didn't want me to be there for the Peru chick because she was getting jealous of the attention i was giving her. It was genuine concern for her well being of course.
>>18083982
Ugh I can see it ending which is something I want to prevent.
Idk I just want to make things work out.
We talked about being just friends and gong back to how we were.
She says she's not down for FWB but that's how we started and she jokes about seeing me still if she's w someone New and we both agree to do that, not being serius of course.

Let's say I try my luck with the Peru chick, how would I go about doing so
What options do I have with the information I'm/I've given
>>
>>18084054
>What options do I have with the information I'm/I've given

As I see it you can either take a chance with the Peruvian girl by telling her how you feel about her and that you want more than being just friends like >>18083951 said or you can try to a fix a very flawed relationship.

>I'll list risks for you here:
In the case that you tell to the Peruvian how you feel your risks are a)your friendship becomes awkward if she doesn't feel the same way b)if you do end up breaking up with your current gf and get with the Peruvian, there's a risk for revenge or something

In the case that you decide to fix your relationship with the current gf, your risks are a)further manipulation that takes a toll on you b)you might end up losing your gf if she takes offence at you trying to fix things c)the Peruvian feels sad that you didn't feel the same way about her as she did about you and it again makes the friendship awkward

>Positives
In peruvian's case a)you end up in a relationship with her b)you get rid of a manipulator

In staying with your current one a)you stay in your relationship

These are based on what I read. It's up to you if you want to take the leap of faith.
>>
>>18084131
U right

Fuck
I'm talking to Peru girl and she's saying I missed out and it sucks to be me rn cuz she invited me to Dave n busters but I had work early today.
Ughhh I don't want to look like a fool and approach her about this. I cherish our relationship even though were not as close as we used to be. I sent her a message the day after Vday telling her thankful I am that she's still here and I apologised for going mia in her time of depression (which was caused by her abusive ex) I didn't want her to be left unloved on vday so I let her know she's appreciated and she's important to me.

Would it be better to ask her out to dinner when I'm single as opposed to confessing?
I guess it depends on her

I want to know I what she's thinking
I can't fucking read her. She isn't flirty with me until we saw each other. Sge was diff From how I remember her.
I've seen her 3 times in the last 2 years

I should prob breathe and chill and let things play out, decide on what i want before I do anything id regret huh
>>
>>18084180
I honestly can't tell you what you should do or not do. Like I said it's up to you if you want to take the leap of faith. You know your situation the best and I trust you'll make the right call.

It's also pretty cool that one can see your internal dialogue from that post.
>>
>go out drinking with girl
>she keeps on buying more drinks
>walk her home because shes drunk
>trying to sober her up before she goes into her house and wakes everyone up
>she starts making out with me
>she gives me a hickey
>im ok with this but im more concerned that she sobers up so i try not to let her do this too much
>tell mutual friend what happened
>mutual friend says dont tell her
>next morning she wakes up and sends me a big bunch of messages saying that mutual friend told her what happened
>she says that she feels i took advantage of her and that she doesnt like me at all

So did I exactly do anything wrong? SHE was the one who asked me to hang out. SHE was the one who asked me to go to the bar. SHE was the one who forced her tongue in my mouth. SHE was the one that gave me a hickey.

All I did was walk her home. We were both drunk, her moreso than I, but I did not have an agenda. I make sure ALL my friends get home safe when drunk.

She has kissed me once before when I dropped her off home after she was drinking, but I pushed her off me and told her to go inside.

I never want to take advantage of women when they are intoxicated. I'm the "nice guy" who walks them home.

Did I do anything wrong?
>>
File: meeh.jpg (1MB, 1694x1133px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
meeh.jpg
1MB, 1694x1133px
Girls : some men are really into feet. Are there girls who are into feet as well? Or are they into some other nonsexual bodypart? So yes which one?
>>
How do you deal with self-consciousnes about your body imperfections towards a possible partner, girl- or boyfriend?

I for example have several issues like:
> acne scars on my back
> occasionas pimples on back and upper arms
> whiteheads on my back
> strech marks on my belly, shoulders, thighs, back, etc.
> a huge darker pigmented spot on one of my legs (like a birthmark, but homogenous)
> light overweight (too much fat, esp. at belly)

I can't do anything about most of this issues e.g. the scars or the strech marks. I did the very best I could in conjunction with a dermatologist and my acne still went on badly.
I already am training to reduce my overweight but how I said, the rest will stand forever.
The most unpleasant part for me about my strech marks is that even though the have lost their coloration, everytime I work out and get my blood pumping the marks turn bright reddish...
>>
>>18084225
Nah, she's just surprised an confused about what happened.
>>
>>18084225
No you're good bro
Tell her the real story lol
Mutual friend wasn't there when it happened
Mutual friend just got caught lying lol
>gave you a hickey
Show her the hickie gg

Do you want something from her intimately ?

Keep up the good work, the right one will notice eventually.
Don't let anyone take advantage of you tho
>>
>>18084225
>tell mutual friend what happened
>mutual friend says dont tell her
don't tell her what? wtf?


>next morning she wakes up and sends me a big bunch of messages saying that mutual friend told her what happened
>she says that she feels i took advantage of her and that she doesnt like me at all
from what i read, she is embarrassed that the relationship and thing you two have isn't private. you told a mutual friend and she feels vulnerable. she no longer feels secure and feels like a fool for opening up to you. she sees you took that as a weakness so you could take SOCIAL advantage. she messages you paragraphs about this proving she isn't afraid to tell you how she feels. yet she is the chick in this situation. it's her fault for getting fucked up and placing herself out there like this. but at the same time you didn't keep the business you twos business. she has the right to be mad at you, but for her to play some victim like it's all your fault, is just ridiculous. so did you do something wrong? yes and no. should you admit defeat and apologize to her? no not at all. tell her how it is. don't get all upset and chase her. that's what she wants. think about it, it's pathetic a female friend is getting fucked up presenting herself for a guy friend. she is in a pathetic state in her life.
>>
>>18083507
yeah just do it. don't hesitate and overthink it otherwise it will be more likely to crumble. but you played it safe which isn't necessarily bad. i've had girls talk to me when they were out with their own family, it's awkward for me AND the girl when the family realizes what she was doing. on your part think about it, if it was her bf she's the fool for dating someone so much older with so many more resources.
>>
>>18083385
go out and feel no awkwardness. have the desire to talk to people in your city. don't force shit just let things flow. and don't let alcohol give you courage, you will feel like a fool later on when you are by yourself.
>>
>>18083375
well that's what the relationship becomes about, to an extent. a circle of friends. an extension of people, not just you and your date. when you two hang out alone things will be completely different. i'd not go on a double date until me and my date are both comfortable around each other enough that we can for example hang out and not say much to one another cause we already know how things are between us. like best friends status. cause after the double date with a new date, that social awkwardness at the start of every relationship will still be there. i don't see how a double date will personally help you right now. maybe hold off on it. maybe not.
>>
>>18083338
my question is why do you want to be with girls like this? lol don't stoup down to their level lik 85% of other guys do.
>>
>>18083207
when she breaks up with you she is gonna run to a guy like me seeking out bad boy sex.
>>
>>18083130
Anyone on what I can do from here?
>>
>>18084254
halp pls
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