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i'm a 20 year old male and i feel like i have no one. i'm

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i'm a 20 year old male and i feel like i have no one. i'm an only child and i haven't met any of my family other than my parents and i am totally disconnected from my culture. i have some friends in college, but i don't consider myself close to them at all because our interests and worldview is so different.

i've tried making friends with people in my classes, but when i hit them up on messenger it seems like no one really wants to talk. sometimes they just Seen me. as a 3rd year student, i feel like everyone already has their friendships solidified and one wants to meet anyone new.

i feel like i am trendy, smart, and have a bright future career-wise, but it seems like no one really cares about any of that. i'm not autistic but i'm not great at socializing and this may have something to do with it. maybe i'm not a fun person to hang out with? i spent all of high school playing video games in my room so i didn't get much chance to develop my social skills

i have a 4 day weekend and honestly i am really sad about it. i don't know what to fill this time with. i am constantly depressed. i wish i could find a group of people who like me for who i am, so that i could grow and prosper and think of useful, positive thoughts instead of always thinking about this predicament i am in

every year i get older i lose more and more friends. i don't know what's wrong with me. i am barely holding it together. why am i an outcast?
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>>18058762
What's wrong with being an outcast? I have no friends, and I enjoy it very much. I have tons of free time to read and learn new things
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>>18058770
because i'm human and i want to be loved
i feel like there's something missing
haven't had a girlfriend in over 2 years and i miss having arms wrapped around me
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>>18058775
>i feel like there's something missing
If you really felt that strongly about this, you would have found someone by now. It sounds like you say you care, but you don't really care
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>>18058762
I feel you. I've felt like this for a long time until I started to take the "fake it 'till you make it" approach. Just interacting with people and getting out of your comfort zone goes a long way.
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S?
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>>18058807
i don't agree
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I was the same as you and ended up leaving the country and becoming an expat abroad (Japan). Fuck fitting in with idiots, just be your own person. Once you leave school/university you don't have to deal with these shitty social group settings so much anymore.

Anyway you don't have to have friends to make a girlfriend/get married
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You are boring and I bet you are "the weirdo" but nobody would tell you.

>i have a 4 day weekend and honestly i am really sad about it. i don't know what to fill this time with

Study languages
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>>18059044
what's it like being an expat? currently studying mandarin and considering moving to china. currently in the US

>>18059052
hm. i don't think i'm boring per say, but maybe people find me that way since we don't have a lot in common. i am pretty deep in music/art scenes in NYC and that's something a lot of people where i'm at can't really relate to
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>>18059135
You can either fit with the natives or just wall yourself off from society and focus on money and career

I'm somewhat of a hybrid between the two, don't really give a shit what the average person here thinks but I'm fluent in the language, understand the culture and like weeaboo things

It's better than having to put up with irrational cultural baggage of my home country
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>>18059149
how long did it take you to become fluent in japanese?
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This is my two cents so just hear me out. Pretend that everyone around you is your friend. Believe that all those people are busy with their own shit and that you have something to learn from all of them. Their too busy right now but later they are willing to talk and hangout. Be willing to try new things.
Lastly, just try to be a pleasant person to be around.

That's it. I was in the same situation that you are in. By trying to do those things I listed they helped me. You can't always be everyone's friend but you can just try to be a pleasant person that's all anyone can do.
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>>18058762
Hey OP are you me?
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>>18058762
Have interest, hobbies, volunteer, join meetup groups that do something together, like hiking or playing boardgames, if you are not the best at tallking, the common activities help to find friends. Don't worry too much about highschool because most people don't learn actual social skills there, they are just mean to each other and trying to be popular. Of course it would have helped if you had interest based connections then but when I think about it, none of this HS teen talk has helped me how to speak to people as an adult.
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Smoke pot, drink, do drugs. It may or may not attract friends, but, it helps.
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>>18059390
2 years to get N1
Thread posts: 17
Thread images: 1


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