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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

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GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.

FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever.

>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.

>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.

>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off
>>
For both genders


Why would I have a gut feeling that it will work out with a girl, even if all seems to be going against it?
>>
Should I go through a slutty phase?

I've always had conservative views on sex and relations, I've always wanted to only have sex with only one woman and settle down with her.

But as I got older I've started going out more, drinking more, going to parties and talking to girls. I'm also quite attractive so conversation goes smoothly.

I've been told women don't like virgins, and much prefer a man with experience?

Does that hold any truth?

Should I mess around with one or two people then call it quits?

Should I stay conservative and settle down with that someone once I've found them?

What should I do? I'm pretty damn horny all the damn time, but somebody I can spend my life with is far more important to me than drunk hook-ups anyday.

I'm young though..

Please mention your gender in your response, I'd be interested to hear both genders
>>
>>18058746
Femanon
>I've been told women don't like virgins,
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
This holds true. It's never as much about the virginity as it is the god awful crippling anxiety these dudes get about it.
You seem to not care much though, you obviously care a little to have asked, but you aren't past the point of no return.

When you have sex is totally up to you mate. There is no right or wrong answer. Personally, I don't hold much morality to sex. I don't think anyones wrong or bad for having a ton of it, so long as it's appropriate. IE, consentual, you're not leading anyone on with it, etc.

The type of sex people have and how they go about getting is more important than the amount really. I'd say most women aren't gonna fault you for having a couple NSA flings. Some might be turned off by even 1 casual sex partner though.

But it sounds to me like you don't really care about sex as much as you do about finding a partner, and let me tell you from the point of view of someone who was EXACTLY in your shoes, it's not gonna make that empty feeling go away.
I gave into the casual sex game too, even though it was never sex I wanted, I really wanted the love. But, I was horny, frustrated, and just plain defeated. I gave into it, and it did not solve my problem. It did not fill the need for intimacy like I hoped. It just kind of made it worse. And it's addicting. You get addicted to that fake intimacy, the pretend feeling of closeness. It gets hard to kick, so just be wary.
If you're horny, my advice is to jack off and be done with it. Because if you are a sappy romantic type that still believes in the archaic notion of dating and love like me, it's not gonna feel real good anyway. It's not what you really want, and it's not a replacement.
>>
>>18058716
Question for girls
Is it a good thing if I keep on doing things for a girl I like(such as buying things for her, help her and give her advices about her issues, talk with her etc.) while she doesn't do anything for me?
The only reason I do these things is because we have a lot things in common and because I like her but it seems like she barely give a shit about me unless she needs something. Should I just give up?
>>
>>18058773
>buying things for her
Bro no. Everything is is relatively fine, since it's not costing you anything but your time, never buy bitches shit. No matter how cheap. You don't spend a dime on them until you're established in the "dating/talking" phase and you both are aware this is somewhat romantic.

Personally though, if she puts no effort into your conversations or anything, never contacts you, whatever, I would distance it. Not necessarily give up, but put her on the back burner. Keep looking for other women, and if she really wants you, she'll actually make a fucking effort to show it.
>>
>>18058725
wishful thinking
>>
Should I divorce my ugly wife? I've experienced some of the most humiliating moments in life because of her, people stare at me in public because she's so grotesque her face is probably the most ugliest thing anyone has ever seen. Also she's a fobby chinese.
>>
>>18058790
I don't know, she has been teasing me from time to time because I think it's obvious I like her but it just feels like she's profiting from the situation.
She's also the 'happy-go-lucky' type and always smiles and shit.
>>
>>18058773
You have to be one of the biggest betacucks in the whole world
>>
>>18058805
If you truly loved her then you wouldn't abandon her for this.
>>
>>18058813
I don't.
>>
>>18058820
Then do it. But keep in mind that you will break her heart and she will most likely commit suicide later.
>>
>>18058820
Then divorce her so she has a chance at someone who will give a shit about her. ffs why did you marry her to begin with?
>>
>>18058794
Probably.... But still I suppose it can be possible for there to be something my gut is picking up on?
Or it may be looking at the big picture instead of focusing on smaller details?
>>
>>18058825
That'd be great actually and maybe she'll kill herself when I show her this.

Thanks for making my day anon.
>>
>>18058746
It depends on the girl. Girls who are also promiscuous and have a slutty phase tend to want guys with experience like that. Girls who are conservative and are waiting for a life partner usually won't settle for anything less than the same standard in a guy. I'm the latter, so I personally would advise you to stick with your values, rejects temptations, and wait.
>>
>>18058831
You're welcome.
Dick.
>>
>>18058805
You're getting added to the OP next, ugly Taiwanese/Chinese wife guy.
>>
>>18058828
She's so ugly and useless no one gives a shit about her. I panicked because I'm afraid of being alone so I wifed the easiest bet but I probably should have tried way harder.
>>
>>18058837
Why? This is my first time posting this and my names not Brandon!? Please don't profile me this is creepy for an anonymous imageboard.
>>
>>18058840
Yup, correct your mistake buddy.
>>
>>18058769
Thanks for the response my dude, was bored and thought maybe I'd dig around and figure myself out a bit lel.

That was a very thoughtful and heartfelt response, I appreciate it. Deep down I know that's the feeling I'm gonna get, every hang over I get I spend grumpy and embarrassed about what I did the night before, and I've had some close encounters already where I was grateful I didn't follow through.

I'll be honest, I think that false sappy romance narrative is what I'm looking for, I've just yet to fulfill it in any way. It may not even exist in real, functioning and healthy relationships, which is kinda why I asked the question in the first place. Is what I want even possible?

Thanks again though, real eye opener response.

>>18058833
I figured as much, a lot of this stuff always ends up down to person to person. It's hard to know who you really want to be sometimes kek.
>>
>>18058811
I'm aware. That's why I'm asking if I should keep going or just stop and look for someone else.
>>
For girls:
is a smiley face, heart emoji, or 'lol' right after an insult (like, "you're so dumb") a good thing or a bad thing?
>>
>>18058867
Bad
>>
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Girls, can I dick be too big for you?
what size would you find absurd and what would you do if you come across one right before sexy time?
>>
Girls do you touch the a guy's knees/thighs while talking to him if you're not attracted to him ? Like repeatedly, even though you know said man has a GF, and that your own BF is in the next room ?
>>
>>18058746
I'm a virgin myself and here's my opinion:
I really don't care what your sexual history is. Just don't have hangups about it. Even though I'm a virgin, I feel like sex is not a big deal. Over the course of your life your feelings and preferences about sex will change and that's totally normal and expected. Having such rigid views is so stupid to me.
>>
>>18058872
how? she always teases me and bumps her butt into my leg when she walks past me.
>>
>>18058891
She's obviously making fun of you, probably laughs about you with her friends.

Source: was a teenage girl once
>>
Honestly, are only condoms enough?
>>
>>18058894
we're both in our twenties.
>>
>>18058847
Man I feel you, you and I are literally on the exact same page. I'm questioning if guys like you exist in the real world, you're questioning if girls like me exist in the real world.
This chance meeting though should at least tell you there's one other person out there. Logic must be that there's more. I refuse to believe I'm all that special or unique of a human being lol.

I mean, try it if you want, maybe you'll have better results. I've just come to quickly realize that having a handful of hook ups trying to take the place of the relationship I want so badly, is really just making me feel like shit.
>>
Not really relationship advice but: this girl and I were caught up OK n a rough situation where we were both hurt and used. However, I felt she deserved better and looked out for her, but I don't think she knows I care. We aren't comfortable talking to each other right now, but should I message her telling her how much I care?

I've offered an olive branch, asked her for casual lunch, but it's been a month and she hasn't contacted me.
>>
>>18058904
Women can still be immature retards in their 20s anon.
>>
>>18058882
Yes, most are too big for me.

Everyone's different, I for one can barely even tolerate a couple fingers, let alone a dick.
For me, the first meeting of a dude where I'll see his penis is not the meeting where it'll potentially go inside me. I always start with strictly oral/handjobs, and may or may not progress from there. (Spoiler alert, it never has, for one reason or another).
There was one dude recently who's length wasn't so much the issue, it was just he had the fattest cock I've ever seen and it scared the hell out of me. I told him that too lol.
>>
>>18058901
For what? In general, after abstinence and then sex within a longterm mutually monogamous relationship with a tested partner, they are your third best protection against STDs. HOWEVER, condoms only REDUCE risk, not eliminate it. They are pretty great against HIV and other fluid-born illnesses, but not so great against skin-contact ones.

As for birth control, comdoms are relatively shitty and I would not recommend them for that alone. They are a simple physical barrier, very prone to user error, and even with perfect use have a comparatively high failure rate of 1 out of every 50 women pregnant every year.
>>
>>18058901
They're pretty safe, they only have a 2% fail rate as I recall, if used 100% correctly.
As a man, they are your only form of protection, so remember that. Plus, its the ONLY way to protect against STD's. (though it doesn't eliminate the possibility altogether)

Personally, I'm on the pill, but I would never trust it alone if only for the STD thing. If it were a dude I've been with, and love, I would probably be less cautious about STD's but still, pregnancy means I have to kill myself because theres no way out of that mess that doesnt end in me killing myself anyway. So I would always insist on condoms, until he gets a vasectomy. Preferably, I use 3-4 methods at once because I'm a paranoid freak. Condom, pill, pull out usually. Sometimes spermacide. But again, I am definitely abnormal in my obsessive behaviors revolving around preventing pregnancy.
>>
>>18058908
but is that a good thing or bad thing? I act pretty normal up until we're both talking for a few min, then both of us go full retard.
>>
>>18058905
Kek, it is ironic. I know there are definitely other people out that wishing the same thing, or their own variation of an ideal and happy relationship. Its more so if they even work out, its a life long dedication only having one or two partners, which can be just unrealistic for most people. People change constantly, and most of the time they change to grow apart.

That being said, some people definitely have life long and healthy relationships, but it takes a lot of work into maintaining them.

Best of luck to you through fami, date more ripped dudes, they tend to be the ones who want to settle down the most; frogs in disguise :^)
(At least that's what I've taken from browsing /fit/ for 3 years)
>>
>>18058913
Which size would be perfect for you?
>>
>>18058941
Hah yeah, of course there is all the other shit, like if you have compatibility in other ways. It always seems like your type isn't in to you, all that jazz.
>Ripped dudes
Huh, I would have figured it to be the opposite, ripped dudes would just wanna fuck and dump. I don't find muscle all that attractive though, unfortunately lol.

Best of luck to you too mate.
>>
>>18058950
Idk, I've never really bothered to measure my hole.

I'll put it this way, the "perfect" size is probably unrealistic. I've got a vibrator thats about a little more than the width of a quarter that's too much for me. I don't think there's any pencil dick in the real world thats smaller than that. Couldn't even tell you length, because I've never made it long enough to find out.
But I'm likely not normal, and have never tested it on a real dick anyway. So take my opinion with a grain of salt. I'm just going off my personal solo experiments.
>>
>>18058951
Well, maybe more like those fat-fit dudes, lel. Ones who lift heavy, but don't particularly obsess over body image.

True dad bod
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ETvvi45QcMA

People with direction and goals I guess, people who work towards self improvement, because usually that leads towards improving other aspects of your life, including relationships.

My two cents, I'm clueless really c",)
>>
>>18058955
Have you ever tried MDMA?
>>
>>18058980
Ah man dad bods are worse lol. But I'm being superficial, though to a certain extent I think you gotta be. If sex is something you want in the end, can't really have a sexual relationship with someone who you don't find physically appealing at all.

But yeah, some day it'll probably happen. Waiting around until then sucks, and it's painful, but what else can ya do. Nothing's really gonna fill that need, except that exact thing. Its like cramming a circle piece into a square hole. You might make it fit, but those corners will always be open.
>>
>>18058984
Is that like, ecstasy? No lol. I don't do illegal drugs. Why?
>>
>>18058994
I heard a few cases of girls with your problem and that solved. Made them 'relax'.
>>
How can I tell if a girl is not interested in me. Couple of weeks ago there is a girl at work and I asked her if she wanted to go hang out and see a movie and she said yes.The night of the movie she text me an hour before to tell me she can't make it and she felt really bad about it. Next day I asked her what up and she told me her mom took her car so she had no ride even though we were just going ride in my car but I guess she didn't want me to come to her house which I understand. I snap her again asking if she wanted to try again but got no response from her but she read the snap. We still small talk a lot at work and didnt bring it up again but thinking about asking one last time this time in person but don't want to feel like im smothering her about it.
>>
I precame when flirting with a girl I like. I'm 23 and have been in 2 serious relationships lasting over 3 years each.

This has never happened before, and the two of us haven't done anything besides flirt.

Why? Is this normal? I can't stop thinking about her.
>>
>>18059003
huh. Well idk. I am pretty high stung and stressed about it, but I don't think I'm that stressed about it. More that I'm just too chicken to push the limits myself, but also too chicken to jump on any ole cock.
Starting to lean towards just having my first taken by some rando and getting it over with though.
Hell, I was starting to think I would just get that fat cock'd dude to take me since I actually knew him somewhat well. He told me though he didn't want to take someone's virginity, too much pressure or something. So that went out the window.
>>
>>18059011
>Starting to lean towards just having my first taken by some rando and getting it over with though.
Don't do this. It seems in your case the problem is more psychological than anything, not necessarily stress though, which is why maybe the solution could be psychosomatic as well. But seriously, don't do it with a random.
>>
>>18059011
I agree with >>18059014

You most likely need someone you really love and trust to "unlock" you down there. It's probably the natural way of your body to prevent you from getting knocked up and abandoned.
>>
>>18058725
more ideas?
>>
>>18059014
>>18059020
Ugh why not though, it's all I can get. There ain't ever gonna be "the one", nobody's gonna love me, I've played that angle for years. Idgaf anymore, I give up, new dude in my bed every night is better than no dude in my bed every night. At least I can pretend the rando cares about me. The amount I can pretend my pillow cares about me is only so high man. I'm seriously about to kill myself I'm so goddamn lonely, and the defunct vagina is whats keeping me from not being lonely for at least a night.
>>
>>18059008
She's not interested, man
>>
>>18059022
Buy the pills girl, and get to fucking. Jesus.
>>
>>18059022
How old are you?
>>
>>18059032
22. I know I'm young. I'm also in the prime of my existence. I will never be more desirable than I am right now.
And yet, I'm still not desirable. Not enough to date at least.
I know it's because my self worth has hit rock bottom, and I'm well past the point of no return on desperation. All a dude has to do is compliment me and I'd jump his cock, I get that little attention. I cant fucking stop it though. I can't fix this issue unless I can get a date, but I cant get a date because I can't fix this issue. It's a never ending cycle of mediocrity on my end.
I've exhausted all my resources on meeting people. I've done the online dating, I've begged friends to set me up, I've talked to class mates, I've hit on randos at the bar, I've gotten jobs and talked with coworkers, none of it has been working. After like 6 years of doing all that, only till just now did I even get people offering to let me suck their dick no strings attached. I never even got that before, just straight rejection. This is really as good as it gets, because idk what else to try.
>Love yourself
Tried and failed at that too.
>>
How do I make her leave with me?
>inb4 conversation and hennessy

I have a excellent track record of hooking up with club sluts, but only for 15 minutes before they lose interest and disappear. The couple of one night stands I have had are the result of their initiative or me being blotto and totally alpha. It's totally understandable for me that girls go out to only dance and grind on my semi hard-on for a while, before they go the next party with her friends or home to the bf. However, in another setting when I'm sitting at a table and two girls sit down beside me and start negging me, it's obvious that they want to get to know me better.

Do you just throw some lame suggestion to go get something to eat or when they have asked for social media/phone number, say that you are tired and just go home, hoping they'll call you later that night?
>>
>>18058716
Is there a way to tell if your boyfriend considers you to be marriage material?
>>
>>18059043
>I will never be more desirable than I am right now.

Wrong

Males do not peak in their 20s, males sustain fuckability up to their 50s, and often times they actually become more desirable with age
>>
>>18059080
>Is not male.
Yeah, men age fine, women however age like milk. We start to go bad by 30.
>>
>>18059080
Sorry, ignore me, I didnt read the rest of your conversation and I know see that you are a female.
>>
>>18058882
Yes, definitely. My fingers reach to the back and cocks certainly can me longer than my tiny hand's fingers.

Most vaginas are only 4-5 inches deep

Im a virgin so I dont know what Id do, but I imagine Id tell them I dont think it will fit all the way and just hope that he wouldnt mind leaving half his dick out
If it was too girthy I suppose Id feel bad about the fact we got hot and bothered for nothing, Id probably want to give him a blowjob or handjob and hope hed return the favor.
>>
>>18058940
Its a fucking bad thing anon

She views you as lesser, fun to goof around with but thats it
She'll use you in the future if you let her
>>
Amy I overthinking this, or is this possibly indicative of interest?

This girl does subtle things like this to me.


>I was walking, and she was sitting on the edge of a tree planter talking to someone on the phone. (Probably her sister, she does that quite a bit) I then sorta scratched my nose, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw her kinda begin to smile. I don't know if it was from the call or if it was because of me

>Another time I sorta turned my head randomly and saw her standing right there waiting for class, and it seemed like our eyes just sorta met and held for a few seconds.
>>
Ladies

Let's say that sex robots are now highly advanced, have lots of variety, and are dirt cheap all of a sudden.

Would you feel threatened by them?
>>
>>18058746
My boyfriend had sex with only one other girl before we met, and it still bothers me.

I really hate thinking that she's all over him and somehow has "stained" him. Sometimes it really squicks me out.
Hes the first person Ive ever loved and it hurts a little bit knowing that he has that place in my heart but I dont have the same position in his.

I think being sexual with another person is special. It feels good to know that Im his and hes mine, and it feels especially good that he specifically is the one who gets to know me in an intimate way others dont get to - it adds more meaning to it.

If I were you Id keep waiting, and find a girl like yourself.
>>
>>18059110
No, because I dont treat my boyfriend like shit.

The only women who feel threatened by sex robots are women who seriously are only good for their vagina - theres seriously no reason a man would chose a robot vagina over a woman with a good personality in any situation, unless theyre an incredibly insecure or undesirable male - either way, shouldnt threaten females at all unless and if it does just kys.
>>
>>18059110
Are you talking about female sex robots?

Because if there were dirt cheap highly advanced male sex robots, I'd have one for myself.


Overall, no I would not feel threatened. Because it's still masturbation and I just find masturbation so different than sex. Like, I could program a robot to fuck me how I want and get me off in two mins, but I'd still prefer my bf to fuck me.
>>
>>18059100
Could be either or

Id talk to her
Or try actively showing her youre interested
>>
>>18059076
By talking to him about it and asking him
>>
>>18059110
Nah, because there's more to life than just sex. I have faith there will still be men who want a living breathing partner to share their life with. Plus no matter what, there's always gonna be that mental aspect of "This isnt a real person I'm fucking and that's kinda weird"

If not, oh well. You bet your ass that if there's a female robot, there will be a male one too. Rule 63 I believe
>>
>>18059117
She probably knows I'm interested. (But seems to shy to proceed)

And I actually have her number. And have spoken to her in the past (Prior to which and after we started talking she would do similar stuff)
>>
>>18059082
>>18059083

I noticed
Youre more likely than you think to find love anon, dont worry.

Mine happened completely by accident
I think the best thing you can do is let life progress naturally, and if youre going to make an effort just make an effort to get out more

You wont find the guy youll marry in a club or bar, keep that in mind
Get a dog and go to dog parks
Get a hobby and do that somewhere
Go to the gym
>>
>>18059110
No. I think if highly advanced sex robots were a thing it would be better for everyone. It would keep the bitter unfuckables in their basements where they belong and presumably keep them occupied while removing them from society where they usually would be hassling women for sex and getting continually rejected because no one wanted them in the first place.

It's seriously win-win for everyone.
>>
>>18059124
Id say start doing stuff together

A slow burn and build is fun

>>18059121
Can I ask your gender?
Im a bit afraid of a no, and Im a bit afraid of asking the question if he doesnt actually have an answer yet
I wouldnt want him to feel negatively about the whole thing because I put him on the spot and made him think about something so serious when he doesnt know himself, I personally would feel kinda bad if I had nothing to say yet knew the other person did already feel like they could marry me
>>
>>18059110
I wouldn't personally feel threatened, but I'd worry for society.

>>18059126
Japan is steadily on their way there and it certainly is not a win for them.
>>
>>18059128
>Id say start doing stuff together

I really believe that IF I managed to hang out with her one on one, it will all go nicely with her. But she seems too nervous or anxious to start anything.
>>
>>18059129
What's going in Japan has nothing to do with sex robots. Their entire societal and social structure has been fucked for decades. Centuries even.
>>
>>18059129
Honestly in the age of automation I dont see whats so terrible about a declining birth rate

If few people are having kids in Japan its the few who were decent enough to unplug from their robo-waifus and be successful, and get a family

If nothing else Japan can just crack down on NEETs by saying anyone able-bodied and with job opportunities (jobs near them they are qualified for) wont get NEET bux, and any self-inflicted disease wont be taken care of.
>>
>>18059125
At the same time though, nothing in live ever just falls out of the sky. If you aren't doing something about it, it'll never get done. I've just been trying do aggressively to make this happen for many years, I can't just sit around twiddling my thumbs singing someday my prince will come. I do go out, I do every weekend. I don't have many social hobbies, I've tried getting into many but never liked anything I tried. I tried just sticking out some social hobby I didn't like just for the sake of talking to and meeting people, but they all could tell I had no interest and was just faking it.
I go to the gym but you can't talk to people there. They all have headphones in, they're all doing their own thing. I've tried the group fitness as well, but again, its just doing your own thing but in a group.
>>
>>18059132
Then you need to

>Hey [], Im doing x later. You should come, it will be fun
>>
>>18059128
I'm a girl lol. You don't have to pose it as a direct, yes or no question. You can simply start by talking to him about life goals. Like what are his? Does he even want to get married in general? What even is "marriage" to him? When and with who would he want to do it? Is he the kind of person who only enters a relationship with someone if he sees that potential, or does he think of relationships as more casual and if they go that direction he goes with the flow? Does he believe people should sow their oats and get experience before settling down? And of course you tell him your answers to these things as well. They are important topics to talk about in a relationship, even as just abstract concepts in the beginning, not concrete plans. You get to know each other on that level that way. Communication is essential for a relationship, especially a life-partnership.
>>
>>18059136
Yeah, Japan's population crisis has been going on forever now. Though Europes going through the same thing.
>>
>>18059140
I guess. Usually when I try with her she either says that we should but is busy. Or is outright busy.

Well, I tried that once actually. And she happened to be upstate for her Bros Uni Graduation.

I guess I could invite her next time I go into NYC?
>>
>>18059139
Damn

I honestly met my boyfriend as a teenager online playing epicmafia, luckily he was in the same country as me

Maybe try to make friends from here using discord, many will be male and potentially one of them will actually be decent, notice youre decent yourself, and bam!

I have no idea in all honesty
>>
>>18059136
Yes exactly. "Sex robots" and related things are more the symptom than a cause.

>>18059137
I'm not sure if automation can stop their aging population from collapsing in upon itself.
>>
>>18059142
I was hoping for a guy for obvious reasons, since Im trying to get inside a guys head, but thank you

Weve been doing that "conversation about serious topics and opinions" thing more and more frequently which is probably pretty good
I suppose I will talk more, Im just skittish about it as you can tell

>>18059144
I might start with something a little smaller than going to a far away location alone together
>>
>>18059146
Idk, I just don't know what good making friends with people who are always going to be on the opposite side of the country than me will be. It's not like I'll ever see them. Online "friendships" typically don't last either. It's too easy to just bail since there's no consequence.

Nobody fucking lives in southeastern Missouri, I've discovered this real fast.
>>
>>18059148
Im the type of person who would advocate the euthanization of all the elderly on welfare who have dementia to help cut down costs, so I dont think Japan is going to collapse because I am more open to certain solutions than others might be.
Im an optimist, Japan will not just ignore their problem. Incentives, propaganda, laws requiring children...They will do something.
>>
>>18059151
I guess may be better to start closer. But it's not like NYC is particularly far either. Only an hour by train for both of us
>>
>>18059153
I think finding good friends and finding someone you love would be worth whatever trip you might have to take. The majority of people you talk to will likely be from the same country as you.

Either way, making online "friends" never hurts you
It just gives you the chance of meeting people you otherwise couldnt have met, people who are more likely to be compatible with you since its a very select few who will end up in the same place as you across the web and then make the effort to talk to you

Genuine friends can be made online, they just arent common. When they are made though it speaks to something that they stay when they could easily bail like you said.
>>
>>18059155
The government is already going into panic mode so we will see what happens. Most people just need to have kids for a culture/society/nation to survive. That's the bottom line.

We might see Japan finally give in and start mass immigration, but who knows how successful assimilation would be on that scale. Japan might inevitably disappear either way.
>>
>>18059158
Whatever you feel is best anon, its you and her not me and her.
>>
>>18059155
You don't understand dude, the young population is dwindling. The old population is dying out. If there are no young people at all anymore, then you're just left with the old folk. Who cannot defend a country from attack, who cannot run a country in general. There will be nobody left to give the euthinasia man, there will just be a husk of a country that's there for the taking.

This is whats happening with Europe, and you know what they're projecting to happen there sometime in the distant future if this trend keeps up? The ones who ARE having babies, the middle easterners, are going to take over. Whole races of people can be wiped out pretty easy if nobody wants to uphold it.
>>
>>18059167
I guess. I just don't do much shit locally. I usually go into the city if I wanna go out.

I could say like
"I'm heading into the city with a friend tomorrow. You should come along with us"
>>
>>18059155
I live in Japan and Japan is ignoring their problems

The average salary of a Japanese person isn't even 60% of the average American and people here don't give two shits. They have no national pride or interest in catching in up with the western world.
>>
>>18059170
Well I suppose theyre fucking fucked unless they start to fix it right now

I cant do anything for them, Im a spic, importing me wouldnt help them any
>>
>>18059178
>>18059179

I suppose theyre fucking fucked unless individual japs who do give a shit get together and MAJA
>>
>>18059164
I still don't feel like that fixes my problem of wanting sexual intimacy. Can't fuck a dude from miles away. It's not like I'll ever have the money or ability to just uproot my life and go to them, and I doubt anyone would want to do the same. At least not until we've theoretically been together online for years. I've done long distance in the past, it's just impossible. Someone always finds someone closer to fuck, and that's the end of it. Because being with one another physically, even outside of sex, is basically mandatory for a healthy relationship. I too require a lot of touch and care. I'm impatient, it's part of my problem. I'm going mad now without physical touch, getting in an online relationship would just magnify that because not only can I not get any, if I do it would be cheating.

But fuck it, I'll try it again. I've got no other options. You know what they say about the definition of insanity though.
What the fuck is discord and how do I use it
>>
>>18059181
All the ones with a few braincells who give a shit leave Japan for the US
>>
>>18059184
Trump would probably just boot them unless they gave him a personal donation of 1 billion dorra.
>>
>>18059183
I fell in love with someone I met on 4chan. We've been talking on discord for about a year now. I know your pain and I don't know what I'm going to do or where this relationship is going to end up. He's in another country. I'm so crazy deep in love with him barely 5 minutes go by that I'm not daydreaming about finally getting to put my hands on him. It's maddening.

I don't know what the fuck I'm doing with my life. Just going along with the flow for now but fuck it what am I supposed to do? Just quit something that is making me happy in the moment because it might not pan out?
>>
>>18059183
You seem to want no solutions, you say nothng falls into your lap yet dont understand having to wait till you can make those miles to meet that guy is worth it if its the right guy

Literally just look up Discord, its the easiest shit to use. You can probably get a lot of anons discords just for /adv/

Try to just chill and talk and make friends maybe
The point of this is that maybe youll happen to run into a guy you really connect with, not that its definitely going to happen

It will at least be good time killing and an easy way to talk with current friends/family if you get them to get discord (I am not being payed)
>>
>>18059191
You've got more willpower than me man. I would have gone insane by that point.
>>
>>18059190
Trump literally gives 0 shits about legal Japanese immigration

Unless the nips are going to be taking a boat to the US and crossing the boarder illegally, or selling drugs, theyre perfectly welcome
>>
Women: What determines when you want to have sex with someone?

I mean for men it's like if they hot we down for bang. At least most of us.
>>
>>18059195
I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be a little cunt. I just know what I want and digital relationships aren't that. I want someone in my bed right now, I'm losing my mind from the physical loneliness and need a fix for that. If I shouldn't fuck randos and pretend they love me just for 5 minutes, idk where to find people to actually love me, that can be available to me in person.
An online boyfriend to me just means I have to continue masturbating and crying alone.
>>
is it a common to thing to lie to your SO if you want the relationship to end? like, making yourself seem like a shittier person so they stop loving you?
i feel like my ex was doing this to me towards the end and idk if i'm crazy or she is or wtf
straight dude by the way
>>
>>18059198
Only because he doesn't realize he can profit off it yet. Once he starts selling green cards everyone will be kicked out, until they can buy their way back in lol.
>>
>>18059201
I mean, its one tactic. I wouldn't call it lying as much as it is just trying to get them to break up with you so you don't have to do it.
It's still very childish though.
>>
>>18059199
He convinces me. Like, if he's smooth with his words and body language, he can get me into bed pretty easily. Doesn't have to be that attractive even, just 6 or higher.
Guy I was with recently just played me like a fiddle and it was fantastic. Went out for drinks, bar was too loud, asked if I wanted to go for a drive around town or something to talk. We drive around, at this point I was already kinda interested, still didn't know yet. Mention my house was near by, he asks to come see my place, put on some netflix. He throws that arm around me, cuddle time, starts probing me with sex related questions. Eventually just kinda gave me the eye, pulled me on him, everything was golden from there.
A man who takes control with me is a man my panties are always droppin for.
>>
>>18059200
Youre not going to be able to get someone in your bed right now though

If you want someone to fuck go get that
If you want a relationship the only thing to do is open as mmany possibilities as you can, and wait - if youre seeking a relationship its not possible to get a guy in your bed right now anyway

Online boyfriends become physical boyfriends - best to have this possibility open than not open I think

If you do go find someone to share your bed tonight they wont be able to fill the emotional void, you will have to wait for that no matter what

I know how painful it is to feel this way, I was incredibly depressed because of it once
Do you have a dog?
>>
>>18059206
In this case she was also talking about how she was a bad person, how she never really loved me, that she was just pretending the whole time, etc.
I figured it was something like that. It seemed like something people would do in high school. Not sure why it happened with me.
>>
>>18059199
I honestly cant tell
>>
Girls

How am I suppose date a girl and go without having any sex for 6 months or so without her dumping me?

It just seems that it's normal to have sex after just a few dates. I don't feel comfortable with that at all. So how do I tell her that I want to wait several months, without her thinking I'm lame?
>>
>>18059224
You date a girl who also wants to wait before having sex
>>
>>18059201

Not unheard of, but it's a coward's tactic.
>>
>>18059199

I'm a virgin but I'll tell you I think about sex with about every man I meet. Intrusive thoughts and all that, and it may be because I've never been with anyone.

I'd theorize that usually the guy has to be attractive and charming, and that's it - only if she's a person that just up and has sex with someone when she wants to. Otherwise it gets more complicated.
>>
>>18059226

How am I suppose to know that before dating?

I'm not just going to ask "are you ok without having sex for a while?" Before asking her out....
>>
>>18059199
If we are going to be life partners and I'm going to have his babies.
>>
>>18059231

Mention it during the date, but not immediately. Maybe even wait for a second date to bring that up.
>>
>>18059231
>>18059224
You become good friends before becoming a couple. That's what my boyfriend and I did.
>>
Girls

Have you ever fantasized about your male friends before?
>>
>>18059236

Yeah I guess that makes sense. But, I just don't know how that topic would even arise Tbh

>>18059238

Well, if we just become good friends at first, how do I not get friendzoned?
>>
>>18059239

Yep. Unintentionally. I try not to think visually because then either celebrities or friends/family show up. The former makes me feel like a "this is my fantasy husband" creep and the latter either disgusts me or makes me feel guilty.
>>
>>18059244

Ask something like "what are you looking for long-term?" Try to think of dates as a relationship interview. You want to connect and have fun, but it's important to figure out what you both want in order not to waste either of your time.
>>
>>18059248

Yeah thats probably a good idea.

What are the odds of a girl being ok with going a long time without sex? 6+ months?
>>
>>18059217
I know, I just want it to be physical as soon as possible. And like, I'm not entirely meaning sexual by physical. I express and understand love through physical gestures. Hugs, cuddles, touch, hand holds, without all that, I don't see how you have anything meaningful. (And I'm not trying to offend you or anything by that. It's just me personally not understanding how anyone's satisfied with just vocals.) I speak so much through body language, I'm not a very chatty person.
I don't see how I could even progress into boyfriend territory without being able to hug, kiss, or cuddle them. Its just staring at a screen to me. It just seems like, idk, such a cold way to start something, to just have to wait months, years, most likely forever to ever actually meet irl? And then what most likely meet for a single day every 6 months to a year? Flights are expensive as fuck, and I have 800$ to my name and 2 more years of college.

>Do you have a dog?
Ah wow, awkwardly my childhood dog died about 2 months ago.
My living situation is complicated. Basically, my dad did the math on how fucking ridiculously overpriced my college's dorms were for a shitty cubicle you had to share with a complete stranger, and realized he could buy a cheap fixer upper for less money than 5 years in the dorms, and then he could probably even profit off it by renting out the spare rooms and then when he goes to flip the house and sell it.
So I can't move out, since I'm living here for free. My dad would only allow for a single pet to be in the house, and my roommate took that space with her cat. The cat just stays in her room all day, she doesn't like anyone other than my roommate.
Used to go home to my dog sometimes, but yeah. He was 17, it was time.
>>
Do women generally think about certain guys on their free time as much as guys do for women?
>>
>work with girl since this time last year
>she is extremely introverted
>has an extreme aversion to physical contact
>she finds out I like the same lame hobby as her (Pokemon)
>she wants to come with me a couple times to play Pokemon cards
>we go to the lake to play Pokemon GO
>end up sitting in the same cube at work
>I make her laugh
>when I fuck my teeth up and get a gap she says it makes me look cuter
>offers me her blanket when I say I'm cold
>comes over to my place to play Pokemon
>one day at the lake she tells me she has never dated at 28 and wishes she could meet somebody, despite her introverted appearance
>says she vehemently hates alcohol thanks to her dad but she still brings me beer that is only available in her area

Fuck, I like her so much, but her standoffnish can be so intimidating. I want to try something, but I know it's just autism
>>
>>18059250

Depends on the girl. Your typical "Stacy" will think it's lame but any girl who knows she wants a relationship and sex that's meaningful should think it's okay.
>>
>>18059254
I think about the fuck buddy that's basically ghosting me a lot lately. Not sure that counts.
>>
My gf and I have been dating for 8 months now. About a month in she asked if she could have my phone password, so I gave it to her. Afterwards I asked the same and she said no, when asked why she said she has weird pictures on there. I didn't really care that much so I just let it go. We've now been dating 8 months and I have no particular reason to doubt she's being honest or faithful to me, but I jokingly asked if I could have her password now and she still refused. She just said "you know why, you just forgot." I kind of think she might have forgot the reason she told me herself. Now I can't help but have some suspicion. I feel like in a relationship, transparency is a necessity, but I'm the only one who's transparent here. Am I overreacting to something dumb?
>>
>>18059254

Dunno. How often do you think about women?
>>
>>18059260

she's being a bitch. She asked for your password, so it's only fair for you to get hers
>>
>>18059261
Not him.

But I think about women a lot. Not really in a sexual sense either. I just think of girls with cute faces, and how it must be nice to sit with a cute girl and hold hands. I've never done that before
>>
>>18059252
Not that physical intimacy isn't important but for me, getting into someone's mind and having to express yourself just through words is so much more challenging and rewarding. The kind of intimacy you can build with someone that way is far and beyond like a normal relationship because, all you have is words. They have to do and be everything. But not everyone has the patience or tolerance for that, I get it.

For me, I like it. I still crave the touch though but the lack of it just fuels my imagination more than anything. And then I can tell him about it, and it's hot anyway.
>>
>>18059260

Either she forgot or she's gaslighting you.

Change your password. Don't give her the new one. Trust is a two-way street.
>>
>>18059261
As of right now, she comes to my mind at least once every twenty minutes.

It's unhealthy but I look normal on the outside!
>>
>>18059260
Don't allow her access to your phone if she's not going to allow you access to her's.
>>
>>18059270

Totally normal. Just do yourself a favour and think about what you want in a relationship outside the cutesy stuff so you have a standard other than whatever girl agrees to date you.
>>
>>18059258

Sadly I imagine most girls are going to be Stacys.. I live in an extremely liberal area..
>>
>>18059277 (me)
keep in mind this is on free time
>>
Girls, be honest, how does this webm make you feel? NSFW
https://i.4cdn.org/r9k/1487381407814.webm
>>
>>18059250
There are girls who wait until marriage. And they aren't just some small religious minority either. 6 months is really nothing.
>>
>>18059286
gross
>>
>>18059199
It's been fairly different reason for all my partners. I've only had 4 partners including my current long term bf.

Guy I lost virginity to was a very short term bf in high school: He kinda convinced me to and was excited that I was a virgin. Used to smoke weed then and just got carried away when we were high one day.

Second was a bf after the first one. I chose to have sex with him because he was attractive and there was a lot of sexual build up between us. We were together for two years and it went bad. I was very physically attracted to him, but didn't like him personally. Kinda thought it would come over time because he really liked me, but it ended sour.

Third was during my early adulthood drug experimentation binge. Hung out with a really strange guy who I had a lot in common with. We'd just get high and chill. I was not physically attracted to him but was attracted to his personality. We had sex once and nothing was ever the same friendship wise. We slowly drifted after a period of weirdness.

Current bf, knew him for a long time. Found him ridiculously attractive and strange in all the right ways for years but too shy to talk to him for a long time. Started dating after talking at a party. Had sex pretty fast because I just had a feeling we were really sexually compatible. I just, like, knew that he's the perfect amount of dominant, affectionate, and weirdly playful. I was right. I am really submissive and playful in the bedroom and he was someone I could be all that in front of so easily. He's probably the first person I was attracted to in all aspects that I had sex with. Probably the first person that I am just completely eager to have sex with as well.


I mean the common denominator of all these were that I was attracted enough to them in some way to want to be in intimate situations with them.

Other factors are just timing and where I was at in life.
>>
Question for everyone

Do good relationships spark from hookups? Is it a bad idea to try to find a partner through hookups? Is the slow "making friends with them and hoping they like you back" the better route most of the time (even if it means no sex for months)?
>>
>>18059281

This isn't going to make sense, but I don't want a relationship or sex. But I still wish I could have a girl to talk to, occasionally hug me, and maybe hold hands.
>>
>>18059277

Ask her out.
>>
>>18059254
I think about my boyfriend constantly. I have for pretty much 5 years since I've known him.
>>
>>18059282

So... GTFO. Run!
>>
>>18059295
it's more complicated than that.. she has a boyfriend but she considered cheating with me once.

she had to move but she told me she was coming back next year, I was just wondering if she would forget me or what I've told her about me.

She lives a fast-paced life
>>
>>18059233
You religious?
>>
>>18059291

Hoping for a relationship from hookups is a good way to get yourself some heartache. The better option is to date or get to know people - and flirt a bit so it doesn't seem out of the blue when you want to get serious.
>>
>>18059293

You're right. It doesn't make much sense. Maybe you need closer friends.
>>
>>18059298

I want to.. but, it's going to be 2-3 years before I move. Would it be best to just wait 3 more years before talking to girls? I'm really not very happy about Liberal American girls. I can't stand their mindset and values
>>
>>18059306
Nope
>>
>>18059303

You want no part of that, trust me. You want someone above cheating. If she does it for you, she'll do it to you.
>>
>>18059291
No, yes, yes
>>
>>18059310

It'd be best to wait, yeah. Or go online.
>>
>>18059286
It makes me wish my SO was here so I could give him the succ
>>
>>18059309

I don't really know how to go about that. I mean, the only female friends I have live in different countries. I became very close to one of them, just seeing her smile at me when we'd skype, and listening to her voice messages on Whatsapp made me feel pretty happy. I really enjoyed that friendship a lot. We got close and talked about really personal things, I felt comfortable with her. But once she got a boyfriend, she stopped talking to me..
>>
>>18059312
Do you value your virginity, have fear of pregnancy or STIs, or not find pleasure in the act?
>>
>>18059313
I don't think she was expecting a relationship out of this, but this departure has opened up a sad box inside of me.

I can't stop putting my trust that she will come back next year, she was such a nice person to me
>>
>>18059315

>go online

Terrible advice desu
>>
>>18059318
First one, but I also don't think it's worth it to risk pregnancy or disease on someone who isn't your life partner.
>>
>>18059318

Not her - maybe she just knows what she wants in a relationship? I know /I/ want kids and I'm not going to fuck around with some Chad. I've got about ten years to lock that crap down or risk a down-syndrome baby.
>>
>>18059320

I'm just listing options, but tell my why it's terrible advice.
>>
>>18059319

Don't hang around for her, man. If all you could possibly get out of it is a good lay, why would you risk a year's worth of dating/sex opportunities in order to get it?
>>
>>18059324
This too. I just want one life partner and have absolutely no interest in anything else.
>>
>>18059324
Wasn't implying that she wanted to fuck around with a bunch of chads. You can still fuck in a relationship before getting married or making that life decision.

What about sexual incompatibility issues when you do have sex?
>>
>>18059337
I agree, but still, nobody caught my interest like she did.
I'll try when I can for someone else, but I can't stop managing my hopes, it's overwhelming.

thanks for the help everyone, or you if it's one person. I appreciate it, really.
>>
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>>18059330

I was on Tinder, OKC, and POF for 2 years. Out of all of those, the only source I even was able to talk to girls on was Tinder. I met up with 1 girl and it was a huge waste of time. In general girls on Tinder never matched me. And I never got a single reply on OKC or POF.

The funny thing? I've had an Interpals account for 2 years as well, and on their I'm ALWAYS getting messages from attractive european girls (ages 20-23). So it can't be any profile issues.

Pic related
>>
>>18059346
Not her (I'm the one you're originally replying to), but sexual compatibility can be determined by knowing yourself and communicating with your partner. Everything else just takes some practice and effort to learn how to please each other.
>>
>>18059256
What's the question?

>>18059260
You're stupid as fuck for giving her your password and she is a HUGE bitch for not giving hers (after you gave yours).
So much for "equality"...
>>
>>18059346

I guess I see that.

Personally my goal is to know if the guy is the kind I can see something lasting with, no bullshitting myself. I want to give a damn about him, and for him to give a damn about me, before sex. Once that is known, then I imagine we'd talk about it a bit and then work our way to having sex. Compatibility wise... I don't know. It's not like there's this uncrossable boundary in at least talking about it.
>>
>>18059259
So you don't have that much of an emotional connection, but you think of him regardless? That counts in my books
>>18059297
This sort of helps, he must be doing it right then.
>>
>>18059348

Mostly me, thank you for trying to see a little sense despite the feeling. I know the urge is there, but it's good that you're willing to take the opportunities you see.
>>
>>18059357
Makes sense. I wonder how hard it is to find a guy who is nonreligious that would agree with this. I can't imagine there's many out there but maybe I have a limited view.
>>
>>18059271
I suppose. I just don't really have that imagination.
>>
>>18059349

The online dating scene is pretty rough, yeah. I was just thinking about chatting through forums or something that are related to your interests.
>>
>>18059372

"Older" guys (25-30) are probably the way to go on that. The ones who've already seen the madness that is "Stacy" and have their life goals in order.
>>
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>>18059370
Yeah, its more that I'm like "shit this was the only good thing going in my life, it's gonna take years for me to find another person I'd even be sexually compatible with, and worst of all I've lost my dick to jerk off and have fun with. What did I do wrong?"

I'm too picky. I just want me a fucking dominant man who will let me touch his wiener all I want and toss me around like a doll. Why are there next to no men like this anymore man.
I know the answer to that though, I'm just not hot enough to pull those men.
>>
>>18059372
Anon you're replying to here. I don't think I'd recommend the older experienced guy thing. They are pretty much the male equivalent to the "stacys", wanting to "settle down". I was fortunate enough to find my like-minded guy in high school.
>>
>>18059244
You shouldnt become friends with someone with the goal of dating them
Thats what the friendzone is, when one person is in the relationship under false pretenses
After a while you feel like youve waited long enough, because friendship was never a good enough end goal from the start

Basically be friends with people youd be happy to just be friends with and be able to lose interest if they dont show any towards you

It has to be an organic thing

>>18059252
If it were possible I would have suggested a dog, for obvious reasons.
I think having anything you can put all that loneliness towards and change it into caring would be good though, like flowers or even a goldfish.

I can see that you and I are very different though, Im an incredibly talkative person and prefer to be direct and to the point about things, just straight up saying them. I dont think any of my solutions will be any of your solutions, since we function differently.
>>
>>18059377

Yeah it's bullshit. I know it couldn't have been my profile. Because my profile sucks on Interpals, POF, and OKC were exactly the same. I got nothing on POF/OKC, but on Interpals, I get soooo much attention from girls just like pic related. Thing that sucks, they are all overseas..

>forums

I don't see how that'd help. My main interests are all things that girls generally aren't interested in. The only common interest I'd have with girls is I like languages, but that's where foreign girls always talk to me (which isn't a bad thing). But, yeah, girls in the US suck.
>>
>>18059260
Youre not over reacting

I would change your password, inform her that you changed your password, and not tell her the new one. Tell her that you dont feel comfortable being the only one who cares enough to be honest in the relationship and that you cant trust her if she wont trust you.
>>
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>>18059377

Forgot pic>>18059397
>>
>>18059286
That cock hole is abnormally large and so is that cock, bit gross

Also dislike seeing a girls face all up in the cam and a girls tongue when I could just be looking at a dude stroking himself instead
>>
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For women: How do I stop being ignored in text messages and real life by women. Every time I initiate a conversation I get as far as hello and then I'm ignored. What do I do to stop this
>>
>>18059394

Well If that's how this works. Looks like I'll continue to be single forever
>>
>>18059404
>I get as far as hello
Well there's your problem.
>>
>>18059397

Well, the different places have different purposes. Tinder is usually for hookups and POF... probably the same as OkCupid? I've no idea.

Eh, have a little hope. I'm one, but I'm also in Louisiana and that's where /some/ of the BLM stuff happened. I'd go for red states if you had the ability to choose. Otherwise, I don't know. Try to branch out?
>>
>>18059397
>generally

Find the exceptions you nimrod, it will be worth it
>>
>>18059405
Be optimistic anon, if you see the future as bleak you actually will make it bleak for yourself

If you see the future as bright you will inherently act in ways that will make it bright
>>
>>18059404

"Hey, how's it going?"

"Hey, do you have any interest in [movie, activity, etc]? I thought we might do that together sometime."
>>
>>18059406
I'll say hey or how are you doing in a Tex message. They respond with fine or great. After that any question I ask them is ignored
>>
>>18059416
What questions are you asking them? Please don't say "what's up?" or "what are you up to?" or anything similar
>>
>>18059404
Where are you finding these women?

If they're women who are hot and date around, they probably have several guys messaging them at once. They only respond to the ones they find interesting.
>>
>>18059409

well I might be moving to Florida in 2-3 years.

>>18059410

How can I find the exception if American girls won't even respond to be online?
>>
>>18059412

Well, I don't even have any female friends. I mean, I have a few but they live on a different continent.
>>
>>18059394
There's some real flaws to this. You can't just overnight stop thinking someone is attractive. If a man is attracted to you, he's attracted to you. What are his options?

- Ask her out early on, right there, then get rejected because you're not supposed to do it that way.
- Hide his attraction for months then ask her out, have woman get offended that she's only friends with him because he wants to date him and then tells him he should have just been upfront about it early on.
>>
If a girl gives you a nickname, does it mean they're interested in you romantically?
>>
>>18059452
Lol no
>>
>>18059419
Hey
>>
>>18059394
Thanks anyway man, I do appreciate it. Idk how to get what I want. Idk if what I want is even possible.
>>
Girls and guys

Is there any significance to the fact that is a MAJOR turn off if a girl says my name while being lewd? I had sex with a girl today for the first time in 4 years. During the sex she started to moan my name, and immediately I went soft and my desire to continue died off. I just started to feel guilty. She obviously because very flustered because I went soft while I was inside of her. It was just the second she started to say my name, my sex drive turned off and I felt bad about myself.

Does this mean anything?
>>
>>18059466
Uh idk, I think its probably just the same as any other turn off. Like I find chicks moaning in general to be a turn off myself (even though I am one. I just know it's mostly fake bullshit.)
I'd just vocalize that with whoever you're with.
>>
How can I stop being a little bitch? I can't even think of approaching a girl without getting terrible anxiety. Add to that me being picky about personality and I have a perfect recipe for being alone forever.
>>
>>18059473

But I feel like really bad about myself now..
>>
>>18059475

There is no requirement for you to talk to girls, get a girlfriend, have sex, get married, and have kids.

It's not required. So don't worry about it.
>>
>>18059482
I want those things though, and the only thing holding me back is in my head.
>>
Girls

What would you think if you met a 27 year old, decent looking, well dressed/groomed, nice guy who has accomplished a lot in his life, but you found out he's never had a girlfriend before or been intimate with anyone? Just in general, what would you think of him. Would you feel bad for him or think he's weird or what?
>>
>>18059483

Well, just remember it's not a requirement. That should relieve some stress, because there is 0 pressure on you.
>>
>>18059488
I'd think it was very unusual he can't read
>>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
>There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>>
>>18059475
Big topic. I struggled with this too. I'll briefly cover the main things that helped:

- Women are as varied and different as men are. They also have problems in their life and face nervousness and anxiety too. The girl you're thinking about could be just as insecure and anxious as you.
- Don't focus on a certain girl too much. I know this sounds hard, but if you do then it will make the fear or rejection worse and asking her out harder, so you're going to be less confident looking and lower your chances with her. You're going to get rejected once in a while. You'll learn to get used to it.
- Realize you'll find another girl in time. There's plenty of women out there.
- Think of rejection as a way of weeding out girls who aren't compatible with you. Then move on.
>>
Girls, what if a guy is shorter than you? Is he still alright for a relationship? Does he have to have some other/specific other traits in this case, that may redeem him? Were you ever attracted to a shorter guy? Did it work in the end?

I'm avery short guy (163cm), but I feel in the other areas i do much better
>>
>>18059490
It doesn't though, it actually just makes me more stressed because I don't want to keep doing nothing about it.
>>18059493
Actually it's not the rejection I'm scared of. I'm more afraid of either getting to close to a girl that's taken or just not knowing what to do.
>>
>>18059494
I'm 154cm so I don't think I'll find a guy shorter than me. I don't know if I could date a guy who was shorter though.
>>
>>18059478
Eh, what happened was awkward, yes, but it's neither of your faults really. Don't beat yourself up
>>
>>18059494
I've never been attracted to a guy shorter than me, but I've only ever been attracted to one guy and he's 4 inches taller.
>>
>>18059510
even being this little? what gives?
>>
>>18059488
Odd, but whatever, He's successful in life.
I would just wonder if it was because of server autism or something like it usually is.
>>
>>18059515
What?
>>
>>18059520
I mean, why would you care for his height in this situation?
>>
>>18059505
You're scared of being disappointed of finding out that the girl you like is in a relationship? You'd rather live in that ignorance than find out and move on from her?

As for not knowing what to do, most girls would say "talk to me like a human" although who knows what that means. Just be kind, show interest in what they say, have a good conversation.
>>
>>18059523
Because I want to date someone taller than me...?
>>
>>18059513

Hearing her moan my name made me feel disgusted with myself.. I don't think I'll have sex again for many years Tbh. That really bothered me
>>
>>18059524
What about approaching? Say there is a girl in my class I'd like to talk to, I can't just go up to her...
>>
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Say I'm a person who has been hurt all his life. 19 and just recently mustered up the courage and resolve to move forward. Got a job and very supportive friends. I go on OKC and make an account summary briefly explaining that This is who I am. Is it a good idea to let girls know right off the bat I'm someone who has had issues with anxiety, depression but has started to change and is on his way to overcoming the burdens? This would be true as the doctor diagnosed me with it for real.

I know people think anxiety and depression are fake and shit but for me, I have been living with a weak heart for most of my life thinking I'll fail. I now know the world is only as big as I perceive it and that's the way I look at it now. I'm more mentally capable than I give myself credit for too. But this is probably a huge turn-off when compared to a guy who's ripped, has a car and two wonderful parents who give him an allowance, right?

I just want advice because dating sites have always been easier for women to navigate as opposed to men who have to chase and impress if they want to meet a person they like online.
>>
>>18059529
Well if it's an inappropriate place like a classroom that's understandable. Don't do it when she's busy.

For the moment, just imagine if she was some dude. Would you get nervous about approaching some dude? If so, why? You can ignore your attraction for her for a little bit just to break the ice.
>>
>>18059556
You're right, it's just easier said than done.
>>
How do I move on after a girl completely cut off contact with me? We were getting along absolutely perfectly, and she suddenly ghosted me without warning. Its been a few weeks, and more and more every day she is all I think about. I am not even truly mad or sad at the situation, even though I kind of want to be. I am basically a bit pissed off all day and am having constant mood swings since. its been a few weeks and there's no end in sight. What do?
>>
>>18059531
On my national cig chat there is this guy, who for like 6 years painstakingly repeats a line like "I'm disabled I look for a nice and happy girl"
So interpret it for yourself - the guy apparently never found anyone this way, while I did multiple times. The problem with him is that it seems the disability is the only thing worth mentioning about him - and that's probably the worst start imaginable.
So honesty on your part is fine, and you'll avoid many rejections by telling your stuff right off the bat, but remember to include valuable information about your positive traits, otherwise don't bother
>>
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>>18059421
Oh
>>
>>18059564
I here you. It's hard at first.

>>18059572
Don't feel bad. It's not that you, yourself, aren't interesting. It means that your messages aren't interesting. She can't know who you really are based on a small number of text messages.
>>
>>18059531
You WILL regret showing personal weakness to girls, one way or another.
>>
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>>18059584
So what am I supposed to say
>>
>>18059636
You're basically asking to be spoon-fed.

If you've been shut down so many times haven't you learned from it? you need to be able to identify what went wrong even if it's vague.

Start off normal and by that, I mean normal by your standards. Unless you want to pretend you're someone you're not and learn fuck all I can't say I have hopes for you.
>>
>>18059653
I meant other than just saying "hey"
>>
>>18058746
>I've always had conservative views on sex and relations, I've always wanted to only have sex with only one woman and settle down with her.
>But as I got older I've started going out more, drinking more, going to parties and talking to girls. I'm also quite attractive so conversation goes smoothly.
congratz on not being a retard and realizing its fucking worthless to tie yourself down to one person
>>
>>18059566
First of all, are you absolutely sure she ghosted you?

Second, if she has, it's just something you deal with in time. Try to occupy yourself.
>>
>little bro moves out of town for big job a few months ago
>first in extended family to be successful
>visits first time this week
>did call him or anything
>family had dinner planned at my house tonight but i work weekends
>fucking HATE my family except my little bros
>get up, get ready for work, leave,
>dont say anything to little bro

how i do i not feel bad
>>
>>18059719
I don't understand
>>
>>18059707
I posted in an earlier thread, but yeah, I am 99.9% sure she ghosted me. I've seen her once in three weeks, which is when I told her in person to send me a quick text so I could add her to my contact list on my new phone(broke screen on old one). She hasn't done so. Not contacting me at all in those three weeks is also extremely weird, given that she had contacted me in person over so pretty trivial shit. As I said before, we got along perfectly. I am giving her a very slight benefit of the doubt and assuming she has been occupying herself with another friend group which I know she has.
>>
>>18059734
>little bro moves out of city
>visits for the first time in a few months
>completely blow it off
now i feel bad. what do i do
>>
>>18059745
idk, call him? invite him for some fun time on this ocasion or the other? I honestly don't really get your problem. That you're not seing him today is just a minor inconvenience, you can still be blaimed for not maintaining contact otherwise
>>
Guys,

If you meet a girl on tinder/online, after how many dates is it ok to bring up the exclusivity or "what are we" talk?

Girls,

Do you date multiple guys at once? My other female friends tell me I should do this when it comes to online dating but I don't like the thought of sleeping with multiple people at once. I'd rather wait to see if it works out with one guy before moving onto the next
>>
>>18059811
>"what are we
after getting intimate enough, which may be two dates as well as ten. For me it would be the first pillow talk, but it's normal for me (once I find a right person, which is rare) to sleep with a girl the night I meet her. If you are more modest, some earlier point of intimacy may be the right moment
Also, remember that it's tinder, so he probably wants just to fuck you. It's up to you to determine whether it is the case or not
>>
>>18059827
>so he probably wants just to fuck you

I honestly kind of just want to fuck him too (and already have). I'm guess I'm more concerned about him having feelings for me and me having to awkwardly dump him.

I just don't know if in this case if I should establish what I want or just go with the flow
>>
>>18059834
ah, so that's the case. Well, more emotions will develop with time, so talking openly asap seems a good option. Of course he may not like it and decideto break contact, but in this case you'd be probably dumping him in the future anyway
>>
A friend of mine texts me with her problems, usually after a night of drinking. Why am I the one she turns to so often?

I had a thing for her, but got over it a while ago and now we're just friends. I feel thats important because she knew I did and it might be affecting her actions. We hang out maybe twice a week or so. She's really opened up to me in these recent weeks, she's going through some existential shit and I know what that's like. I had no one at the time to help me through it, it seems like she only has me and im glad I can help honestly, but it seems weirdly intimate for someone who I honestly dont know all that well. I met her a year ago but we only started hanging a lot in the past two months or so. She has other friends, people shes known for longer, why open up to me?
>>
Best way to ask a girl out of you don't know her name? We have barley have any time to actually talk, so i just want to tell her I'm interested but I'm not sure how
>>
>>18059668
Really depends on the girl bro.
>>
How can I get girls to actually reply on tinder? Feel like I might as well just delete it because all that happens is I get matched with hot girls,try to send them some kind of witty opener or even just be friendly and say "hey how's your Friday going?" And I get nothing

Is it the time? I message at like 10 normally when I get off work but most girls generally just don't reply regardless

Fuck I feel like just giving up on dating completely, I'm struggling so much to meet someone
>>
>>18058725
Normally, would advise you to "go with your gut feeling." There are, nevertheless, a great many factors that play into the aforementioned. How savvy are you at people reading? How much do you know about said person?
>>
>>18059811
>Do you date multiple guys at once?
No
>>
Which type of love is more fulfilling?
1.rational (love grows with time)
2.passionate (intuitive connection from start)
>>
>>18059929
Both. Both are necessary in combination for a successful, lifelong relationship.
>>
>>18059915
Numbers are always shit on online dating sites. Expect 1 in 100 to message you back. 1 in 10 of them to actually go out with. Don't get disheartened by it, those numbers are normal.

I actually hate dating online for that reason though. You see a woman you actually like and you know that the chances of you getting together is incredibly against you.

Find more women in real life.
>>
Okay so junior in college here, I think my lab partner is into me to some degree. Obviously my autism prevents me from making a move since we're technically in a business relationship, however friends noticing us in the lab make comments to me afterword about how they think we have chemistry, etc. How do I proceed?
>>
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I asked a girl out yesterday, she said yes and she seemed very pleased with the fact that I took initiative, she said she only ever got hit on by guys she doesn't like and that she tried to sit close to me, walk the same way with me after class, stared at me during the class and all that, except, you know, actually fucking talk to me...To be honest I only did this because she's hot (probably where the ego comes from) and now I start to find her annoying. First date hasn't happened yet, so I guess I have to make plan and stuffs, since I doubt she would.
Now problem is I have this upperback pain that it hurts like a bitch whenever I try to take off my shirt and change into some nice clothes. Is it ok to ask a girl to hang out in my room on our first date? my room is a mess but I'm in pain right now I can't really clean it except for maybe throw out the cum tissues and stuff my underwear in the drawer. Also I'm really horny, I don't want to jerk off again now that I have a "girlfriend". Ideally I would like to lie in bed while she rides me. Any advice on how to make this happen?
pic is just porn, I have lots of those
>>
>>18059986
>Ideally I would like to lie in bed while she rides me
Slow down, all you did was ask her out.
>>
>>18059994
well yeah, she probably won't put out. But if she comes inside my room there isn't much left to do.
>>
Posted this in the "Ask the same gender" thread, but I might as well get a female perspective since this shit is really eating away at me:

>always been afraid that if I ever got a girlfriend that she'd cheat on me
>current girlfriend is really close to a number of guys, a number of which I'm former friends and have terrible history with
>those guys are incredibly antagonistic when they want to be and love to pull shit at the expense of others
>been told so many "jokes" about her cheating on me that I'm slowly starting to believe that it's possible
She says that she really loves me, but I can't help but entertain my cynicism. Am I just being paranoid? I feel like such a candyass.
>>
>>18060006
You are getting ahead of yourself.
>>
>>18060008
Well if those guys are as bad a second you say they are, then it's telling that she would be friends with them. Birds of a feather and all that.
>>
>>18060009
ok I'm asking for a way to ask her nicely to come hang out in my room wtf
>>
>>18060008
Are those guys actually bad people, or is it partly that you can't handle banter? What is this 'bad history' you mention?
>>
>>18059986
>I asked a girl out yesterday
>I don't want to jerk off again now that I have a "girlfriend"
>Ideally I would like to lie in bed while she rides me
You're autistic right? That's the only way I can believe such an incredible lack of self awareness.
>>
>>18060013
You ask her "hey, wanna come back to my room?" Don't be surprised if she says no though.
>>
>>18059986
as much as nothing is impossible, i promise that you and her dating or even ever fucking is impossible.
>>
>>18060020
>>18060024
Just to be clear, do you guys have a gf?
>>
>>18060028
Yes. I've been in a LTR for 3 years and I've dated quite a few women. Reading your posts, I gather that you've probably never dated anyone before though.
>>
Hi femanon here, wanted to ask for advice about my relationship:
>In a relationship with a guy for almost 3 years
>very much love and care for this guy, someone I adore very much
>both of us are pretty quiet and shy, personality wise, introverted etc.etc.
>Been trying to get out of my shy shell and experience a lot of things
>Love of games/anime brought us together among other things

Here's where I'm just a bit off:
>Don't get to see boyfriend as much due to part time job and my course
>Boyfriend has his own friends, I have mine but still would like to talk/see him
>Want to spend as much time with him when I don't see him, feel needy and bossy if I do
>Dislike his best friend, have told boyfriend though but don't want to stop him from seeing him/being his friend
>Due to love of games, ask him if he wants to play games at times, mostly ends up playing games with friends or doesn't want to play what I want to play
>due to boyfriend also being an introvert, hard to try and help him experience new things (his room and being with me is what comforts and helps him)
>end up staying indoors most times I see him, boring for me but everytime i suggest something, it's "I dunno" from him
>did have sex one time, felt uneasy after it and decided not to do it again for a while, but want to try again soon.

I dunno if I'm just being a needy cunt or if there's other things we can do, but at the moment I'm quite uneasy with what I can do.
Anything you guys can suggest?
>>
>>18060016
They're generally terrible, negative people. It's bad enough that I'm inherently pessimistic, but they were only advocates for my personal drama. They would always antagonize me and would consistently go out of their way to slander and insult me--often crossing the line of my trust. I've confronted them about it from time to time, but they never seem to let up and I've even caught one talking shit to my girlfriend before.

Looking back, they hardly treated me as a friend. I honestly don't even know why I associated with them in the first place.
>>
>>18060035
Wait, you've been together almost 3 years and you've had sex once? Are you even in a relationship?
>>
>>18060035
>In a relationship with a guy for almost 3 years
>did have sex one time
I get the feeling this is a long distance relationship, right?
>>
>>18060035
considering you've been dating 3 years and have only had sex once, he's probably emotionally distanced himself. i pretty much gave up on a relationship entirely once the sex stopped. in fact it sounds like you're just friends desu.
>>
>>18060030

hah I knew it's a guy's response. And yeah sure guys browsing the opposite genders thread all have a lot of experience with dating women. I know I do.
>>
>>18060038
>>18060041
>>18060044
Eh. I guess it's somewhat long distance, he lives in a small village but it takes 10 mins by train to go see him, so that's what I do and what he does.
I've asked him about living together in student accommodation together during university time, but he says it's a waste of money.

And with the sex thing, I'm not really into sex but this is mostly because I'm not comfortable with the idea and am not comfortable with myself. I've wanted to try again, but sometimes I get really nervous when it comes close to doing it and I put it off.
We do other sexual things with each other, and he's okay with the fact that I'm not ready or that I want to try again and said we can do it in my own time.
>>
>>18060023
I just told her I have upper back pain and not really comfortable with going out, she said she's gonna come over. Does she expect sex?
>>
>>18060050
Just saying bud, think about it: you asked her out yesterday, you're already calling her your girlfriend and your first date idea is to hang out in your messy bedroom? And you really think all this isn't weird?
>>
>>18060054
10 minutes is nothing...

And it sounds like >>18060044 is right: he's distanced himself. He doesn't want to push you into anything because that'd be a dick move, but no guy is going to be happy having sex once in three years so to him you're probably a friend who he fools around with sometimes.
>>
>>18060056
no of course not
you literally just asked her out a day ago
>>
>>18060056
No. She's probably expect to just watch a movie or two or something

Plus you said she's hot, so she's probably used to guys who just want her for sex. She's going to 'dump' you as soon as she realises you're just like every other guy
>>
>>18060054
>it takes 10 mins by train to go see him
It takes me 40 minutes to see my gf and it takes me an hour to get to work. 10 minutes is jack shit.

I also agree with >>18060044. At this point you're just friends and he's likely given up on anything else.
>>
>>18060063
He did also say
>I'm really horny, I don't want to jerk off again now that I have a "girlfriend". Ideally I would like to lie in bed while she rides me.
So it's only a matter of time before she figures it out and dumps him.
>>
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>>18059986
>asked her out yesterday
>"she's my girlfriend"
>>
>>18060061
I know the 10 mins thing is nothing, so we see each other a bit. The problem is that I go to uni Monday, Tuesday and the morning half of Wednesday and work Friday/Saturday. So we see each other most times after I finish on Wednesday and spend the night together.

I guess I've been going in blind about this, as he's actually my first proper "relationship" so I wasn't really sure what was going on. He dated a girl some time before me but he never explained what happened with that relationship. Probably doesn't help that I'm almost 20, so I'm a bit "young" to understand what a proper relationship is.
>>
>>18060074
I saw my boyfriend about that often while I studied, and one of us would have to travel 45 minutes by train and I still wouldn't consider us long distance. The distance and how often you see each other is pretty standard.

>Probably doesn't help that I'm almost 20, so I'm a bit "young" to understand what a proper relationship is.
The fact that you even asked us about this indicates that you know that this is not a real relationship.

I really don't see any way to salvage this because there really isn't anything to salvage. I suggest you break up, work on yourself and getting yourself comfortable with things like sex, and only get into a relationship once you're ready. Being in a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship is a terrible idea.
>>
>>18060074
>he's actually my first proper "relationship"
But, well, he just isn't. What you have is just a friendship. He's probably figured that you're too busy, too emotionally distant and of course too sexually distant, so he's probably thinking of you as just a friend by now. What's likely happened is that he's had is own little "break up" where he's realized it's not working, gotten over it and is just letting it all glide along until you realize it's over too.
>>
Girls:

Do you find someone who is very trusting a weakling/wimp/someone who is asking to be betrayed? I think I'm too trusting. Coupled with the fact that I'm very naive when it comes to thinking people are innately good, I have been hurt a lot.

I'm asking this because one person about a year ago decided to betray my trust, basically laughed at my naivete and left.

I'm kind of asking what do women generally think of a trusting guy and how can I stop being so naive and trusting. I don't want to become a cynical asshole like one of my friends is, but I find he can navigate life far easier with his "expect the worst" attitude when it comes to people.
>>
>>18060086
I see them as naive and immature, if anything.
>>
>>18060078
>>18060081
You both are right. I probably should just break up with him. I did have feelings for him when we first started this "better friendship" I'll call it, but I'm not sure if there's any point now.
I was having quite a lot of doubts at times, and there were some times where he didn't make the effort, even though I've spoken to him about it.
Working on my confidence will be the best thing for me at this time.
If I were to though, what would be the best way to break up with him? His family has been so nice to me and I don't want to just up and out myself without considering them too. I don't want to do it on my pc too, because that'll show I'm just being a coward.
(Also he commissioned me for an illustration, wtf do I do with this).
>>
>>18060086
You can go through life with whatever mindset you like, all that matters is that you have the strength and resolve to deal with the consequences.

People are going to step on you regardless of what you believe. There are definitely people out there that would take advantage of your trust, of this I have no doubt.

I'm sorry to hear it, but you've got to try to take what you can from it, and use what you've learned to prevent it from happening to you again.

With the whole, "Expect the worst" attitude... I guess I'd rather be surprised pleasantly than rudely. It's not a fun way to handle things, but I think it's just a natural evolution.

We just learn over time how much we can open ourselves up to others without completely exposing ourselves.
>>
>>18060097
Do it either in person or with a phone call, never in any form of text. In person being best too.

Also explain some reasons, don't go overboard, but just about how you've both been distant and it's been too difficult because of uni. As for the illustration, you can say that you don't feel comfortable doing it anymore but that you could still do it if he really wants you to still do it.
>>
>>18060089
I know it's a very naive mindset, so that's why I'm asking how can I become less of an asburger when it comes to trust
>>
>>18060057
>>18060062
>>18060063


ok, thanks for the inputs, so I should just appreciate that she actually cares about my well being.

>She's going to 'dump' you as soon as she realises you're just like every other guy

So I should be "different" from other guys. Really? we have the whole day, in my laptop there are lots of porns, and some tvshows, idk if she likes to watch Friends, Legion or the Magicians. Or maybe I can talk to her about mathematics? it's kinda my future career so I tend to think about it a lot when I have free time. That certainly is different, perhaps not in a good way.
Any game that a couple (ok two opposite sex people - since some people get triggered when I refer to her as my gf) can play? Honestly now that she said she's gonna come over I would prefer if she had set up a date some time next week instead. I'm still really horny and I'm gonna let her know. If she just want to hang out and watch me do my assignments, fine.
>>
>>18060105
I'm just worried that he'll end up trying to talk me out of it and make excuses and say everything will be better and he'll put more effort in.
We've had arguments before and I've told him reasons as to what I feel isn't working and stuff, and he just ends up making excuses and pulling me out if it.
I've ended up getting so angry with him that I've ignored him on purpose because I felt be prioritized his friends over me, and when we make up, he goes on about how he had anxiety attacks and how he hates it when I do that and how he "needs to be told what he's done wrong". That's probably a my bad thing, but still.
>>
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>>18060111
wow, i give up. theres no helping you.
>>
>>18060116
You've gotta be strong anon. If you don't break up it will just loop back around to the same thing again.

Just ignore the excuses and tell him you've thought about it and that it just won't work. I'm not saying burn bridges here but you have to be strong and put across that there will be no relationship.
>>
>>18060122
Dear anon, I hereby acknowledge your effort in spending time to look for an image in your reaction folder to make that post. I'm doing fine with this girl by the look of it. Hope you are doing well, too :)
>>
>>18060130
come back tomorrow and tell us how it went then. if you dont, i'll call it an inspired guess that it went as badly as it likely will.
>>
>>18060130
>>18060139
I honestly can't wait for this. The build up has been perfect. I'd call him a troll but he seems pretty genuine about all his "date ideas".
>>
>>18060127
I appreciate all of the advice, anon. I'll speak to him tonight, after my shift at work.
I've got another problem too. He bought me a necklace with our names on it, but if I break up with him, what should I do with it, I'll feel awkward keeping it with me but I'd like to keep it as a momento I guess.
>>
>>18060139
>>18060143
I'm sorry do you guys want to add something to my date ideas? you know, like to actually address my questions instead of making some weirdly salty comments about the situation or my character, (idk if it's the norm here now, the last time I browsed 4chan was 2015). I already said I won't press for sex or anything, but there really isn't much two people could do in a room when one lies in bed.
>>
>>18060150
Make a box of all the things that you both share or that reminds you of him. I don't personally do it but I've heard some women use it as a way of getting over someone.
>>
>>18060159
Okay, thank you.
Will speak to him later tonight and I'll see how that goes.
>>
>>18060164
I hope it goes well anon. Stay strong.
>>
>>18060168
I'll try my best.
Thank you for all the advice though.
>>
>>18060139
>come back tomorrow and tell us how it went then. if you dont, i'll call it an inspired guess that it went as badly as it likely will.

Oh? I didn't know that guys would actually come back to 4chan.org/adv™ when everything is going well with their relationship and they aren't bitter with girl/job/life problems
>>
>>18058716
Do girls stare at ugly guys?
>>
>>18059917
I not the best with reading people, but I usually can see what's going on.
And I am feel that I know he well enough to atleast see what's going on with her.
>>
tips on how to make out better with a girl?
>>
any girls cheat on their boyfriends?? what did you think of your boyfriend when you did it and what did you think of the guy you did it with?
>>
>>18060234
Trust yourself buddy:)
>>
>>18060622
I kinda am. That's why I didn't just stop talking to her after she sorta seemed disinterested.

I mean she would say that she is busy but would "agree" that we need to do something. Or she would out right ignore it.
>>
Girls:
Is dating a NEET more romantic than dating someone who has their life together?
>>
>>18059429
I have no friends except my boyfriend, and before I met him I had no friends then. Youre not actually a failure for having no friends, good people are very rare. Most friends will slip away even when you make them, the important thing is to be grateful for the relationships you do have and enjoy them while they exist.

>>18059434
Attraction is different from wanting a relationship with her
Ive had friendships with males and females and have been attracted to many of my friends

I think youre assigning too much important to being attracted to someone. Maybe youre only attracted to very few people, so it means more when you are

You kind of prove my point with
>- Hide his attraction for months then ask her out, have woman get offended that she's only friends with him because he wants to date him and then tells him he should have just been upfront about it early on.

ARE you only in it for a future relationship? Then youre doing it wrong and should just ask her out, like you say is an option, and be rejected or accepted.
You cant expect people to enjoy the thought that their friendship only exists as a stepping stone in your mind - I did say that you need make friends with women and people in general whose friendship is enjoyable and worthwhile by itself.

You cant force this shit.
And you cant think to yourself "fuck women suck" just because an outcome isnt guaranteed.


If it were like a math equation then no one would be on /adv/ needing advice about love
>>
>>18059811
>Do you date multiple guys at once?
usually no, but this one guy has been bothering the fuck out of me so i decided to talk to other guys to take my mind of it
>>
>>18060008
If those people are really shitty people, Id say youre right to be worried considering your girlfriend is friends with people she knows were/are shitty to you.
>>
>>18060531
I'm not entirely sure if my situation relates because the only time I cheated was when I was 15 years old and I was just an impulsive child acting like an adult.

I began to date this boy who showed a ton of interest in me. I wasn't feeling it too much. I thought he was attractive, but he just seemed to like to woo me and flirt, as opposed to actually talking about each other. We went on a couple of dates. I broke it off.

A few months later, he tried to pursue me again. Reluctant, but I gave it another shot. Again, I was unsure. I went to a party with some friends one night and we were underage drinking. Ended up making out with a guy in a drunken blur. I barely remember him other than that he was a senior at school. Saw him occasionally and it was awkward, wasn't even attracted to him.

Immediately after the party, I felt extreme guilt and expressed it to my friends. Thought that if I did this, it wasn't meant to be with that guy I was dating.

Everytime we talked, he kept going on about how he was so happy that we started dating again, he also got kinda threatening about if I were to ever break it off again. Telling me that I completely embarrassed him in front of our peers because we had many classes together. I kept bitching out about telling him until several months later. For some reason, I thought staying with him would make up for the fact of what I did.

Of course I realize now that this was a really shitty thing to do. I handled it so terribly and I think I may have lodged a distrust for women into his brain because I was his first girlfriend. At the same time, I had rejected him many times and he wouldn't stop trying to pursue me. It also made me feel awkward because he'd talk shit about me during the periods where I didn't want to date him anymore and his friends would call me a bitch. I felt so socially trapped with him.

At least now, I know how to avoid that whole shitshow of dating someone you're unsure of.
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