This is very much a fetish for me, but he is against it. It is too "much" in his opinion. He knows that I would love ever second of it, but he says he wouldn't be able to do it.
How can I convince him?
>>18056842
I'd rape you instead. Everyone wins.
What do you want?
rough sex?
call you a slut?
slap you hard?
choke you?
>>18056851
He does rough sex, degradation and choking but the idea of setting up a rape scenario is off the table.
>>18056842
What are you asking him to do? To fuck you randomly during a time in which you aren't in the mood? Or to hide in your house and jump out from behind and "rape you"? The whole thing is pretty difficult for a guy to do, because if he just takes control of you when you legitimately don't want him to, it's actual rape and he could get into trouble for doing it if you end up not enjoying it as much as you think you will.
>>18056842
Rape him first
>>18056863
I would just like him to initiate sex at a previously arranged time then when I "refuse" he proceeds anyways and overpowers me and tells me to take it ECT. I'm not asking for some huge rape sting operation.
>>18056855
My gf is into the same thing but a scenario thing is definitely out for me too.
You might also say it's because some women might use it against them if a break up ever occurred. It's a very real thing these days, I've known it to happen to a few guys.
>>18056842
>bf says no
>how do i convince him
this sounds strangely familiar to a certain kind of situation where no usually means no
>>18056866
Oh. Well that's not that bad. I don't know what his issue with that is. Maybe it really just isn't his thing.
>>18056866
If it's a hard boundary for him, it's a hard boundary. You guys should sit down and have an open discussion about possible kinks. You can sort them into categories: yes/maybe/no.
>>18056869
Yeah, he is pretty practical like that, but we are in a long term relationship.
Would you be able to explain your reservations?
>>18056871
Yeah, but I think that a partnership is about occasional compromise in the bedroom and I told him that if at any point he didn't like it we could stop right away.
>>18056872
Yeah, I can't expect him to be into everything.
>>18056873
We have frequent casual discussions about that and I have compromised a lot for his kinks (lactating ECT.).
>>18056877
plan your conversation, be concrete and specific about what you do and don't want. initiate a 4 traffic light system of communication when in scenes.
consider working up to this scene via other scenes that do similar intrusive things?
>>18056877
>Would you be able to explain your reservations?
Well for one thing it's her being upset and looking afraid and all that kind of thing. I'd feel like I'm hurting her. We tried it out once but I ended up being so uncomfortable with it all that I went soft and couldn't keep going. She's wanted to try a few more times since but I'm just too uncomfortable with it.
LTR or not though, I knew a guy in a 3 year relationship that got fucked by it. He lost his job as a result too.
>lactating
Just out of curiosity, how in the world did you accomplish that? I don't even know how that kink could work.
>>18056871
kek
>>18056889
Thanks for the advice! Super helpful. Yeah in my mind we have been working up to a scenario like I described, but there just seems to be a block.
>>18056891
Yeah this is definitely a vulnerable situation for him and that fucking sucks for that guy. Is there any way that you would try something like I described with your girlfriend?
>Lactating
Breast pump + suppliments for 2 weeks. Non-preggo women can produce milk. It's supply and demand.
>>18056905
I suppose I'd try talking it through again but it would have to be maybe a comfortable situation or something. Maybe a lot of light in the room? All stupid things I know but if it was in the dark it would just add way too much to a creepy factor. One thing I do know is to have a cool down period after where you do something fun like watch a funny movie or TV show, which helped when we tried it.
>Breast pump + suppliments for 2 weeks
Considering this and you mentioning you went all in for his other kinks, I think it's fair to bring it up again.
Also maybe dress super sexy too, that will really boost things. No guy can say no to what a woman in some thigh high stockings tells him to do.
>>18056917
>TV show
That is actually an amazing idea. Maybe if we both are expecting that after, we can wind down fast.
>Sexy dressing
I dress up for him about weekly, and I don't really want to manipulate him into being rough because I want him to have a positive experience so that he could enjoy it. I think he would like being rough and taking control too.
How will it ever be rape if you want it though? Maybe re-word it to him. Do a bit of roleplay where he pins you down and does whatever he wants with you and you tell him when you say "no" it's not "no". Have a safe word though just in case and so he won't freak out/get confused.
>>18056922
I think a could wind down plan could bring him around a little since ultimately it's all about being comfortable.
I think with the dressing up thing though, do it if it's been agreed that it's what you're doing. I didn't mean use it to manipulate into making it happen, I meant it more as once it's all planned, it'd probably really get him into the mood.
>>18056925
Yeah I think you're right. The word rape might put him off. And we've done that roleplay but I want it to be more extreme with the dirty talk.
>>18056929
Yeah that's a smart idea to get him more into it. I want him to have as much fun as I will!!!
>>18056842
Maybe ease into it. Start with dirty talk. Maybe do some roleplaying of another variety: something much safer, like a school girl needing to be punished for her bad behavior and bad grades. And maybe do another session with some spanking, and rough housing. I'm sure most of his hesitation is because he doesn't want to hurt you, but part of it may be the roleplaying aspect. It's kind of awkward, and can feel like they're putting on a performance, and a performance is the last thing a person wants sex to feel like.
Also, make sure to have safe words, and other gestures in case your mouth is full, and don't hesitate to use them. If you set some kind of boundary beforehand, or guiding principle, it would be easier to do. Like,
>"I know this is a rape fantasy, but don't do rip my hair out, but if you want to give it a good tug, go for it."
Believe it or not, doing this makes you more trustworthy. It shows that you're being up front with him, and aren't trying to trick, or trap him by letting him float around in the ambiguity of not knowing where the line is of what shouldn't be crossed. Even if you have absolutely no reservations about what he can do, just make up a couple of do's and don'ts.
>tfw I have a rape fantasy as a man
>I'd never dare suggest it to anyone because it'd be fucking weird
>>18056934
Perfect. I think after your next talk he'll probably be more receptive. Also of course the safe word thing, that's a good must.
I hope it works out for you anon and you both have fun.
>>18056917
Keyword is "aftercare" if you want to look into it.
>>18056937
So we have a DD/lg relationship so most of the rough stuff has been in relation to that.
>Putting on a performance
This really makes sense to me! I can see this being his concern.
>Setting boundaries
This also makes total sense. I've neglected this when I've brought it up and I do have reservations so this is easy to do.
>>18056944
Thanks for your perspective anon!
>>18056948
He has had previous partners that were into the bdsm scene and as a result he knows what aftercare is and he administers it after any sort of degradation or roughness. When we are rough we always make sure to affirm each other and cuddle so I think we have that down?
>>18056871
Heavily underrated
yo like raping people you care about sounds like it would suck. as a guy I can't imagine myself forcing myself on someone I care about. even if role-playing with a safe word that could be actually traumatic. like if your bf did this both of you would have a memory in his head of him raping you. this could really change your relationship dynamic
>>18056842
Idk why rough abrupt sex isn't enough for you. You don't even have to say a word. Most guys aren't comfortable being put in a situation that the legal system has aggressively defined as a crime, unless you're going to record yourself in advance saying exactly what you want and give it to the guy in case it ever comes up in the future. Even then, personally I'd be uncomfortable being treated that way / expected to act like that. I like it rough, but it's somewhat of a turn-off to me if the girl seems uninterested or actively opposed to going further or just limp and unengaged. I like friction and resistance and struggle but not in a serious way.
>>18056842
kek. Every guy nowadays is scared shitless of doing this OP because it might come back and completely fuck his life up. All a girl has to do to get a guy fucked is say he raped her, even if it was %100 consensual. This has happened to 3 different dudes I've known since leaving high school. Actually wanting to get raped as a fetish is and should always be off the table in
>current year
don't pressure your bf into doing shit he's not comfortable with.
womyn:
>ALL MEN ARE POTENTIAL RAPISTS, AND THEY MUST BE LOCKED UP
>WHY WON'T YOU RAPE ME?
>>18056891
>i knew a guy in a 3 year relationship that got fucked by it
bullshit
>>18057058
>>18057488
it's fantasy you autists. can't you tell the difference between fantasy and reality?
Get a legal document saying you consent to a rape scenario so there's no way this can backfire on him
If I had a girl say she wants that I would get it on audio, writing or over text, and alert my friends telling them as well giving them the same evidence and recording them say they acknowledge she said it. Also I would set up a secret camera in the room so there's evidence of the event. You have no idea what a man will go through if he is accused of rape. He will go to prison and get raped, his friends and family will abandon him, he won't be able to get a real job, no working with kids or animals, he is literally fucked for life. I would even fucking tell my mom that my girl wants to do it, I would rather tell everyone and have her find out and dump me than keep it secret and go to bubbas big house.
>>18057698
>expecting logic from a woman
>>18058388
yes. are you so disconnected from reality that you can't see how relationship dynamics could be changed by acting out a rape fantasy
>>18058445
yea he is
>>18058445
had two ex-gfs in which we did full-on rape scenarios and in both cases we loved it. did not change the relationship dynamics at all. in both cases we broke up for other reasons much later.
show me an instance in which what you said is true.
>>18058462
it's just a possibility not a guarantee. sorry but I'm not interested in battling anecdotes with you
>>18058468
>I'm not interested in battling anecdotes with you
oohh? :(
>>18058468
then keep your mouth shut
>>18058475
durrr one time the thing that proves my point happened
that's nonsense, especially in online communication, especially here
>>18056842
It's not that difficult.
Have him take maca and other powerful herbal aphrodisiacs. Wait until they take fully effect. Start role playing, that you don't want to have sex. He is going to be so horny, that he will barely be able to control himself.
Be careful in what you do, don't screw anybody's life. And be sure that you want this, it's going to be very frustrating if you pull out after he has taken the aphrodisiacs.
>>18056842
>Be a womyn
>Accuse men of rape after consensual sex for any number of "reasons"
>Want boyfriend to "rape" you (Making it consensual)
>Wants to call it rape anyway
>Boyfriend doesn't want to do it, make threads asking how to rape him (By forcing him to rape you)
>Women in 2017
Look, men have a hard line in current year. That line is usually anything that might get them jailed. Fuck I know a guy who dumped his LTR GF of a year and a half because of the legal 2 year live-in "marriage" (Which she wound up trying to do, despite always being a seemingly sane woman). It's well known that any seemingly decent woman can turn batshit crazy in half a second and the law is so crazily skewed in their favor there is no defending it, only accepting your jail/murder/abuse.
>>18056891
Pussy.
>>18056842
I'd "rape" the shit out of you OP. My girlfriend loves that crap. She likes being pressed against the wall, mouth covered (she's into more mouthplay stuff), forced face down, hair pulled, bruised, you name it.
She's also a shy sweet little thing and timid as hell. Funny how that works.
>>18058488
That shit doesn't do anything you stupid hippie fucking shit.
>>18058537
I was just giving an example/idea. There are some combinations that will make you jump desperately onto the first vagina you see.
>>18056871
Irony is so fascinating.
>>18056842
Listen I'd be fine doing whatever my kinks my partner has as long as it's not to extreme but there may be another side to this op. Idk if he is like this at all, but if I was seeing my gf upset/freaking out while we were acting out some rape scene, I literally could not get hard, seeing the person I love upset or in terror is a huge turnoff. Conversely it's most pleasurable to please them make them happy. It's not that I wouldn't want to participate in your fantasy, it's just I couldn't get aroused seeing you in pain. Unless your smiling, but then is it still rape?
>>18056842
The rape fetish is extremely common with women. It's why I find it so funny. If you were raped for real you wouldn't think it was hot at all.
What women normally want is to just be forcibly fucked without being asked. The ones into this fetish are generally submissive and they want to have no control over the situation, but because they know the guy due to a relationship they feel safe.
You will never have your rape happen unless you were raped. You're just a submissive and enjoy being dominated. Easiest way for you to add some hype (i've done this with a serious ex of mine) is to literally lube his dick up, lube your area as well then tell him to try to fuck you while you fight him off.
I found this to be an enjoyable game and winning was fun because of the energy of the both of us I was able to mount and cum in a minute and then just walk away.
Trust me. Dont' do it without lube. You will get fucked up.