>Shitty work history >Large gaps where I was unemployed

>>18030341
It really depends on where you apply bud. Your resume should be based on whatever position its for

>>18030341

just put it down as is. most wont actually look at the dates. some might, and if they do and its years apart say you were taking care of a sick relative and that required you to be free all day. it will make you seem nicer to them too.

and if at first you dont succeeded, lie, lie again.

stretch out the work history until theres only a few gaps inbetween where you were just hunting for a job

>>18030352
Don't they call your previous places of employment though?

>Been fired/quit every job I've had
Why?

And what you need to do is get a job, any job, preferably one that doesn't require a resume, stay there for 6 months, and then start applying for new, better jobs. Just leave your past work history out of those applications.

>>18030363

if you're important. but most places dont care, they will ask you why you left and leave it at that. mos tarent going to call and be like 'HI YOU KNOW THAT ONE GUY WHO WORKED FOR YOU LIKE 4 YEARS AGO FOR LIKE 6 MONTHS? WAS HE ANY GOOD? YOU DONT REMEMBER?'

none of my refernces have ever been called. nor have any of my previous jobs, most people dont even list a phone number for the old jobs.

that sort of thing is what happens when you're applying for a BIG position that matters to the company so they call your last place to see if you're as good as you seem.

and even if they did they arent going to say
>DID ANON WORK THERE FROM EXACTLY THIS FIRST TIME TO EXACTLY THIS LAST TIME?'

cuz whoever ansewrs is gonna be like 'uhmmmm i think so?' if they remember you at all. and the chances of them getting a manager just to say 'yeah he worked here' is slim.

no one has the time for that.

>>18030366
>one that doesn't require a resume
I literally can't think of any job that doesn't require a resume.

>>18030374
Alright, I guess I'll just lie then. Shit I might as well just make up places I worked at

>>18030397

>i might as well just make up places i worked at

not smart. if you get asked abotu those places you WILL fumble. just the thought of stretching out your experience made you uncomfortable, this definitely will.

a good lie is at least partially true. its how you keep it going.

>>18030397
>I literally can't think of any job that doesn't require a resume.
Fast food, and some retail places, just off the top of my head. Things like cleaning don't care much either. If you can get a job through people you know you're much more likely to not need a resume too.

>>18030403
Fair enough. Partial lying it is.

>>18030410
Yeah all those places ask for resumes where I am.

>get a job through people you know
>implying I know people
reee