ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

Girls:

Is it true that the good old dinner+movie date is considered a bad first date now?

>>18022085
Did you hear that on 4chan? Because you heard it from other males who are unhappy and will do anything and everything to make everyone else just as unhappy.

>>18022085
Not exactly. Dinner is a good idea since it involves conversation and you can get to know each other but you can't do any of that during a movie. A movie is a good date but just save it till you're a few dates in and know each other better.

>>18022089
No no, I got it from a new female friend who was saying that it's a bad sign because it shows a lack of imagination.

I swear I'm not an autist, just curious if this opinion is shared.

How do I deal with the fact that no one will ever love me and my bf is just using me for sex stuff

>>18022099
Well the answer is that it really depends. It's a classic date for a reason, but unless there is nothing else to do where you live, then you probably should suggest something else instead.

>>18022099
Also she was saying it in relation to a guy who asked her out and not because I asked, so I suppose it might also just be a reaction she had because she's not interested in him.

I've been close friends and flirty with this girl for a while. Wanted to ask her out when I saw her next, but got a bit too emotionally invested before that.

She's got a lot of guy friends. No guy experience, though.
Now there's a guy on the other side of the country. Pretty sure he's interested since he keeps telling her how he loves her, but she's creeped out by it and insists he's just a good friend.
Now she's staying over at his place since he lives really far away and staying just for the day would be a waste of time. A few days back she was still talking about how she corrected people they were friends, but I'm having a hard time buying that now and it's killing me.

There's nothing between us either at the moment, but I feel betrayed. Asking details could make me look pathetic and end whatever chance I have, but it's killing me. Should I?

>>18022068
Girls, answer this first and then read the rest...
how often do you masturbate? also it would be nice if you added what kind of lifestyle do you have (ex: full time school/job, part timer, NEET, housewife). Also including your age would be lovely.

Now you can read the rest..
I've been chatting with this girl and tonight the convo got a bit hot, we were talking about past experience and the usual stuff. I asked when was the last time she did it (masturbated) and her answer was that it was over 20 days ago.. which it seems strange too me, quite too long. For the record she's 22, single and has a full time job, lives with her parents. Do you think she's trying to seem prudish or she genuinely doesn't have as high of a sexual drive? Additionally, girls that go for that long without touching yourselves AND are single, do you want sex more if you are in a relationship? Also, for the record she is not a virgin.

>>18022111
I'm 24 and similar to her in terms of personal circumstances, and I honestly don't masturbate. Not sure why you don't believe her.

>>18022110
>you have no commitment to one another
>she is consistently telling the same version of events that he's just a friend
>she doesn't owe you anything

Why not just take her word for it. Since you aren't together there is no logical reason for you to feel betrayed even if she did have sex with him while she was there.

You wouldn't get into a relationship and then feel betrayed because your partner had been with other people before you, would you?

>>18022111
I do it every day if I can. Anything more than a week is torturous. If you are healthy, exercise, eat well and are involved with someone you should have a healthy, active sex drive.

>>18022110
It's none of your business, and if you're this butthurt now, imagine how butthurt you'd be if you found out they were fucking or whatever.

>>18022100
leave your boyfriend. Focus on self development n (don't "discover" yourself "eat, pray, love" style or bullshit like that, but just find your interests and invest time in them and grow as a person: write that novel, finish that education, become passionate about something). Meet people who share your passions Don't put out immediately on the next guy you fall in love then and let him prove that he likes you as a person, not because of sex (don't be a bitch about this though)
i know it's not easy, but nothing is

>>18022085
Guy here, depends on the movie.
If you don't know each other and your first interaction one-on-one is going to be watching a movie is a bad idea, because the idea of dating is about getting to know each other.
If you already know each other a little and both are interest in watching the movie for their own personal reasons then you'll actually have something to talk about afterwards.

>>18022100
You have to love yourself before other can love you.

People that love themselves wouldn't let anyone else use them.

Break up with your 'bf' and focus in your own interest and personal grow.

>>18022115
because of this >>18022117
every single other woman I had this kind of conversations with have always told that they do it often.
Also, here answer pretty much killed the conversation because I was honestly weird out by that.
Why don't you do it tho? don't you have needs? don't you enjoy sexual pleasure?

>>18022143
It's not that outlandish of a claim though, at least I don't think so (though it's perfectly normal to me). As for why I don't do it, I just don't really feel the need to. I don't really get horny unless I'm with someone who makes me horny i.e. my boyfriend. Sex isn't an issue, I just don't have a desire to masturbate.

>>>18022142

>>>18022142

>>>18022142

please advise on how to find a woman who wants to live in a rural area

>>18022146
>i.e. my boyfriend
lol, did you even read my post?
The girl that I'm talking about doesn't have a boyfriend (or a fuckbuddie that I'm aware off).
So your "personal circumstances" aren't similar enough.

I guess we could comparative it to sex, have you ever go 20 days without sex or masturbating while in a relationship?

>>18022148
>move to rural area
>find woman
>???
>profit

why do you think it has to be the other way around?

Girls, what would you do if a guy friend you spend a lot of time with were to kiss you out of the blue?
Best and worst case scenario, as in assuming you liked him as well as assuming you didn't like him, if you were single or if you weren't single - that kind of stuff.

>>18022155

there is a gender imbalance in many rural areas in the younger demographics.

this is because many young women leave to find work in the cities. men do too, but at lesser rates.

>>18022154
I did read your post, and you primarily asked about masturbation.

>I guess we could comparative it to sex, have you ever go 20 days without sex or masturbating while in a relationship?
Sure, and I've done it when my boyfriend and I were apart because I went overseas to see family. It's not like I'm constantly horny.

>>18022164
become an amish

if you want to meet girls in the city who are willing to move to a rural area, then i'd suggest searching for women wo want to be housewifes, otherwise it will be difficult to convince career women. Where to find them you ask?....
no idea, maybe church if you're a christian

Is it pretty much a no-no to attemot sexting on Tinder if you are ugly? I've seen other guys get away with outrageous shit, but I've a hard time seeing my few matches being receptive to that from a short nonwhite guy.

>>18022116
You're absolutely right. There's no reason that she shouldn't do whatever she likes if it comes to that. Hell, she might not even know I'm interested. So why does it still hurt so much?

She talks about him a lot, shows pictures of him continuously, and he's got pretty much everything I haven't or am working on. Basically I'd think she was off-limits if it wasn't for the fact that she slips in reminders all the time that it's nothing.
I've been betrayed before, and this kind of thing just got normal yet painful at the same time.

This is kinda meta, and to both genders: have you found dating advice from your gender, or the opposite gender, to be more useful? As a guy, I've found a lot of advice from women to be self-aggrandizing bullshit

>>18022158
If I were single and liked him, for starters I'd clarify his intentions. He just making me a fuck buddy or is he expressing romantic interest? If the latter, I'd reciprocate and we'd probably start dating.

If I were single and didn't share those feelings, I'd let him know. Yes, it is going to strain our friendship, but I don't think it's inherently irredeemable. Ball would be in his court though, I wouldn't be hanging around him unnecessarily because I would want him to take his time to accept the rejection and get over me, but I wouldn't turn him down if he were to want to hang out strictly as friends.

If I had a boyfriend, regardless of if I still had feelings for said boyfriend or not, I would be rather offended and hurt. I think people who assist cheaters are just as bad as cheaters themselves, and I would be rather irked that he was trying to make a cheater out of me. He knew I was seeing someone, if I were ready to leave them I would have. It's not his place to be making moves like that knowing I'm in a relationship. It would make him look scummy to me.

>>18022179
I've never asked for dating advice here, but I do suspect that if you're going to take dating advice from males on /adv/ you have to be very careful about what advice you take. There are some very bitter guys here, more so than girls. In fact, most of the time when you see a girl speaking up about something that goes against the /r9k/ mentality or narrative, or stands up for women in general, she's shut down by guys perpetuating the generally misogynistic attitude here.

>>18022174
Maybe. Loads of girls treat Tinder more like a game than a way to find hookups so you'll probably find some people who will play if you are funny but might have trouble finding someone to hook up with. Might as well try your luck there is nothing to lose really.

>>18022179
Dude here. Advice from men is better. Advice from women is sporadically good but mostly they give advice based on what they like which is too narrow to be useful across the board. Guys, however, who have dated multiple women, are usually better equipped to give advice that works on a broader range of women.

>>18022179
Some is some isnt. On 4chan, as a woman, I've found most of male advice to be r9k tier "kill urself roastie for not liking me and my specific traits, you deserve to die alone because you're not willing to drop all standards"

Sometimes I learn some interesting stuff. Trick is to take all advice here as a drop in the bucket. I like getting multiple opinions and perspectives and taking out some of the shared key elements.

Reality of it is though, 99% of what is discussed here is not anything that is actually gendered. Unless you're asking about genitalia, which honestly the best advice I've gotten from men about men here is how to better give handjobs.

To girls, can a relationship with an age gap of 9 years with the man being younger ever work out? Even if both peoples values are pretty much completely aligned and maturity is roughly equal?

>>18022179
I have found both completely useless. Guys get it wrong, and you don't know that until it's too late. Girls only apply your question to themselves, which tends to have the opposite effect on a girl with the opposite effect on girls who are even remotely different.

Don't even get me started on /adv/ threads, where you have to be extremely lucky to get a friendly post that doesn't project or give you shit for what you did so far. You have to be lucky to even get a response in the first place.

>>18022197
Is it possible? Probably. Is it likely? Nope.

>>18022197
Unless you're both fairly old or it's some gold digger/ trophy wife situation it'll be weird.

Guys seem to like that jail bait but you'll be dating someone emotionally immature who has no idea what to do with their life that's going to go through a lot of changes in the next 10 years. If you ended up getting hitched it also means you're an old person with old people problems long before your partner.

>>18022197
>Guys seem to like that jail bait
>with the man being younger
Nice reading comprehension there

>>18022220
Meant for >>18022218
My bad.

Anybody, I guess.
What makes women look for men to save them? The past year or so, the only women who get close to me have tremendous problems and bring this shit up really early in the relationship and they seem to want answers/help from me.

>>18022220
>>18022222
Your reading comprehension isn't that great either, son. Try and think about it a little.

>>18022232
People in stable relationships talk about their problems. If someone cares about you and they value your opinion they look to you for advice because they are interested in your opinion, hope you care and want to help them. Road is supposed to go both ways.

Not everyone goes to the internet to help them. Only screw ups like us.

At the first sign of a girl growing distant I immediately decide "I don't need this shit" and imagine the relationship to be over. I just get angry and shut down emotionally. I just get this gut reaction of anger and spite. I have gone on two year streaks without seeking a relationship. Am I fucked in the head and do I need therepy?

The chick I'm seeing didn't want to meet my friend at a concert we're going to. She said she hates meeting people. To me I just think she's saying "All we are is fuck buddies, don't introduce me to your friends. All I want from you is sex". She may be insecure about it or something, but that's what I fucking think she's saying and I'm ready to just go fucking cold.

>>18022242
I wouldn't call two months into a relationship stable enough to bring suicide of family, rehab horror stories, homeless stories, cutting, and abuse into the mix. Those are all separate women. And there was no easing in, just back the truck up and dump it on me.

>>18022250
Sounds like it's you who is picking chicks who are fucked in the head.

>>18022245
Or maybe she thought it was a date and didn't want to end up the third wheel between you and your buddy?

>>18022256
I've seen I Love You Man about 12 times. I know how to act at concerts with a gf. Maybe. But the fucking way she went about communicating it annoyed me. She was talking about going to it with her friend when I was the one who told her that it was even coming up and to take work off for it and we've been seeing her since before that time.

Well, whatever. I'm going to stop initiating any communication now like I always do in this situation.

Anyone have any bright ideas for reconnecting with a girl I haven't spoken to or seen in ~4ish years except to say happy birthday? She had a crush on me for a while, and it was mutual except I was kind of with someone at the time, we're still friends on jewbook and whatnot.

Don't want to come across like I'm just doing it for a fuck. She's good looking and has been mistreated, very sensitive to guys being shallow with her. Was thinking I might see if I could get a mutual friend on board and invite her somewhere?

Started feeling disgust with my partner because they have been with other people and I haven't. Every time they say or do something sexy I picture them doing the same thing with their ex and feel really upset. It is destroying me mentally and ruining our intimacy. How can I accept it and move on with the relationship? How do I make the images go away?

>>18022364

>How do I make the images go away?

Work on yourself. Admit that you're insecure and make a concerted effort to remind yourself of that every time you start to think or feel something irrational.

Thinking and feeling irrationally is not uncommon behavior for human beings, especially young ones. You're not wrong for feeling these things, you're just either too young or too immature to know how to properly process these feelings.

Keep that shit in check. The quickest way to drive a good partner away is to be insecure and make hauling your emotional baggage their responsibility.

Your partner and their past cannot change. The only thing that can change is you and I'm sorry to say but the older you get, the more people your partners will have been with. There is no escaping this so you might as well start working on it now. Its okay to be insecure. It doesn't make you a bad person. In order to overcome it you must have the humility to admit it and the wisdom to accept change.

Strenge question but here it goes;

When I go to the beach with my GF and it happens to be clothing optional, should I ask her before I go naked?

>>18022396

You should probably say "I'd like to go naked, would that make you uncomfortable?". Regardless of her answer you've put it out there that it's what you'd like. She might join you because she wants to or do it to please you, she might not be into it at all. But the point is you made your intentions clear.

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Just a question since I've been pondering relationships:
Why do females like/are attracted to males?
Woman can be the most beautiful creature man can ever lay eyes upon. They're skin is soft. They're hair smells nice. They're boobs are fun to grab. They're vaginas are made for our penises. Listening to them sing is so peaceful! What's not to love? As for guys all we really have is strength... What makes us attractive??

To: Girl
From: Guy

I've heard of guys finding their girlfriends through mutual friends.

>Hey Carly, does Tracy have a boyfriend?
>Nope!
>OH could you introduce me to her?
Is this a good way to do it?

Also, it wouldn't work if I know none of Carly's friends, right?
>Hey Carly, are any of your close girl friends single? If so, which ones??
This sounds mad creepy.

>>18022445
Same guy here. I want to say males will demonstrate their want for a girl, right? Cause guys think girls are pretty awesome for the most part. And then the girl will determine whether this guy is capable of taking care of business. If she thinks that he is a good partner then she'll date em for honest reasons. Also the whole point of flirting with a girl is to make her feel desirable, something that we all really enjoy, and if man can prolong that feeling then he's a keeper. Am I over thinking this?

>>18022451
the first one sounds forced aswell. You have to just attend social gatherings were you meet friends of friends. Then you can form an immediate connection and the girl will trust you more easy since a friend of a friend is a friend

>>18022451
When people say they meet their girlfriends through mutual friends, they mean that they meet them in group situations or that the mutual friend sets them up. It's not forced like that.

>>18022469
>>18022471
Thanks so much.

Why would a guy say he's not looking for a relationship yet he does everything a person would do in a relationship?

>>18022445

It sounds like you wish you were a girl.
[spoiler]lol fag[/spoiler]

My friend is getting fat and feeling bad about it, and I don't know whether it would be ok to talk to her frankly about it or if that's none of my business.

She was always kind of chubby put she's put on et least 10kgs since the summer, so she's like 1,65m 75kg now. She goes to spinning and pilates and shit 3-4 times a week but she keeps drinking soda and eating all kinds of candy and cookies, plus snacking on sandwiches all through the day. She's tried half-heartedly to stop but then she turns into an unbearable whiner with zero energy.

Would it be halal to sit her down and tell her sternly that if she doesn't get serious about cleaning up her diet she's going to keep balooning into a lardass and probably get diabetes? Maybe put together a meal plan and force her to stick to it best I can
Asking because I'm afraid to overstep some sort of boundary, like "you never tell a woman she's on track to be obese, it's her body and she deserves your unyielding support you daft fuck" or something. I don't know, I've never been good platonic friends with a girl before and don't want to trip over my autism. If it were a guy I'd just tell him he's getting fat and it's time he got his shit together (proven method), but a few months back she started crying over a photo from high school like, "I was so thin then." It's sensitive.

What's the best way to say to your bf that you don't like the way he interacts with some of his close female friends?

We have been together for 7 months, and he has two close female friends that I feel like he interacts too intimately with, especially so when he his drunk.

They will cuddle, flirt, he will give them these lingering kisses on the cheek or hand. His friendships, in general, seem pretty touchy-feely.

I know he won't cheat and I don't want to come off as that girl that gets mad because he has female friends, but it makes me feel insecure and embarrassed.

What's the best thing to say so he won't get upset or think I'm irrational?

>>18022494
His expectation of what a relationship entails is different from yours.
Or he likes you and wants to be with you, but he's also fucking other girls on the side and wants to feel morally ok with that.

Give us more details.

>>18022517
Just leave it.
He might start hating you otherwise.

>>18022512
She doesn't sound like the type to respond well to harsh criticism. It's also something you shouldn't really butt into headlong. You could do it obliquely by offering to go running with her or something.

>>18022494
fear of commitment. Simple as that. He likes the time spent together and the things one does, but he is afraid of missing out from other options(other women) if he commits or is afraid it won't last in an actual relationship or he's just not sure about you or he just doesn't like calling it an relationship, so he can exit whenever he likes (as soon as you get too annoying)
confront him and then dump him (probably)

>>18022517
That's a tough one. It's not unlikely that he doesn't even consciously think about it, and when you point it out he might not even understand what you're saying at first because it's just a habit.
I would frame it pretty much like you did in your poSt, tell him that you know it's not actually anything to be worried about, but it still makes you feel insecure and you'd appreciate it if he could think about it, or something like that.

>>18022512
>Would it be halal to sit her down and tell her sternly that if she doesn't get serious about cleaning up her diet she's going to keep balooning into a lardass
yes. do it now before its to late (maybe already is). She might hate you for it and your friendship may end, but i can almost guarantee you that this will happen nonetheless and she keeps getting bitter while you stay thin/fit/athletic. She will ineviatable sprial downward in envy, despair and seclusion otherwise

>>18022527
>You could do it obliquely by offering to go running with her or something.
she is apparently doing enough cardio and body weight training already (even if it's not efficient one) with going to spinning, pilates 3-4x/week. Her biggest problem seems to be her diet and thats something you have to be really frank about. Even if the anon cooks with her some healthy food, he will have no control over what she stuffs insde her the rest of the day. That's her responsibility only and you can only try to educate others, motivate them and hope the best

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How do you fall in love?

>>18022512

God I will never understand that lardass mentality of going to spin class and aerobics while having a horrible diet. Same thing with their obsession of doing their hair and nails when they look like a pig with makeup. Way to overlook the obvious.

Anyways, I've started working at a new place a few months ago. There's a girl there who is pretty cool but was a bit overweight and getting married next year. I overheard her wanting to lose weight and on the first conversations we ever had I straight up asked her if she wants to lose weight to fit in the wedding dress. She was visibly taken back but it didn't take long and she was seeing a nutritionist. She has since lost close to 10 KG. She later on confessed that while she wanted to do it for a while it felt easier when someone else was holding her accountable. Don't imagine I'm standing there cracking a whip on her ass, I am actually very supportive and praise her for every step forward, but I guess it's easier when someone is there to acknowledge your progress.

>>18022535
>>18022539
Yeah I think she's getting a good bit of exercise already and the problem is dietary. We recently started going swimming together once a week as well.
I cook most her meals already because we live close together, I love cooking, and left to her own devices she'll eat nothing but pancakes and bought lasagna, so we eat together a lot & she's well supplied with leftovers. Keeping that part lean and healthy isn't a problem (though the only greens she'll touch are carrots, radishes, & cucumber so salads are challenging), but that doesn't matter much if someone's going through a loaf of white bread and a jar of Nutella every two days.

I will have a firm talk with her about this soon then. Encouraged that the knowledge that someone's watching might go a long way, as >>18022545 says. Thanks lads.

>>18022512
No, it's not your responsibility to do so.
You can ask her if she needs help with her diet or if she wants to exercise together, but it's a bit insensitive to go to a person and tell her "you're fat, do something about it".

>>18022580

sure it is chubby

>>18022583
No, it isn't.
Most fat people know they're fat. This girl clearly knows because she's crying over it and trying to exercise. She clearly knows that there's a problem and telling her she's a lardass won't make her get any thinner.

The right way to go about it is find out why she is overeating so much (for example I used to overeat when I was stressed), solve the underlying problem, and replace her unhealthy foods with healthy foods.
I snack constantly because I have fucked up blood sugars levels, but I'm in shape because I eat small, healthy meals constantly.

>>18022589

That's interesting. Would you mind showing a pic of your body? You can edit out everything that you're not comfortable sharing.

>>18022545
>God I will never understand that lardass mentality of going to spin class and aerobics while having a horrible diet.
It's easier to pretend 5 minutes of exercise is having a credible impact than to fix your diet.

t. fatty mc fat fat

>it felt easier when someone else was holding her accountable.
Definitely. I'm still sour my friend decided it would be easier to give up and bitch a lot when the idea was to work at it together.

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>>18022589
>i snack constantly
>i eat small, healthy meals constantly
>constantly
>i'm in shape

>>18022601
this. post pic with timestamp or you're confirmed for fatty

For girls.

Fucking hell. My gf for some reason is still friends with her ex (they broke up on bad terms, he didnt text her for 10 days, tried to ghost her about 4 months ago, i got together with her about 2 months ago). She assures me that she has no romantic feelings for him and wishes that she could just prove that to me.

But for some reason she think that friendship is still salvageable, does not delete him and still sometimes talk to the ex and ends up getting pissed by what he says. It's literally her telling how he hurts her feelings still and yet she somehow thinks it's ok to still be friends? Fucking 18 yr olds man.

What do I do femanons?????? I'm tempted to just tell her im sick of hearing about it and it makes me feel like shit. HELP ME. How fucked am I?

>>18022601
I don't really post pics of myself online, not even on facebook.
Anyway, I'm 5'7" and around 138 lbs. Not super thin, but healthy.

>>18022612
Well, constantly might be an overstatement. I eat every 2 hours usually.

The medication I take fucks with blood sugars. I eat 1600 kcal a day and exercise moderately.
Instead of having three meals I eat fruit and veggies every 2 hours.

>>18022639
>I'm tempted to just tell her im sick of hearing about it and it makes me feel like shit.

This is exactly what you should tell her desu.
You've done nothing wrong and you can't control her behavior. Don't be afraid of what might happen, it's out of your hands. The only thing you can control is your reactions. If you start being needy and insecure you'll just screw yourself over.

>>18022643

Oh come on, surely you can edit out anything that would give your identity away.
Fruit are not a very good choice if you have problems with blood sugar. In fact I would recommend that anyone cut most fruit along with the other sugars out if they want to diet.

Scared that my dick is inadequate. Girth-wise.

>>18022648
It's not that much about privacy, I just dislike taking pics of myself in general.

I have very low blood sugars, I am hungry constantly and if I don't eat I feel very tired, almost like I'm on the verge of fainting (and I fainted more than once).

I am not dieting, I am happy with my weight.
Fruit keeps me up, gives me a little sugar rush and it makes me feel really good for a couple of hours. If I have to study or work it is my go-to food, otherwise I prefer veggies because they're healthier.

Not everyone's body works the same, this lifestyle works well for me. Of course I don't snack on chocolate and chips, but on berries, bananas and carrots.

>>18022659

Chocolate is actually not that bad in moderation. But real one made from cocoa.
Anyways why do you dislike taking pictures of yourself? It sounds like you are not comfortable with your appearance.

>>18022664
Yes, for someone who snacks 5-6 times a day chocolate isn't a good go-to food. I try to stay under 80-100 calories with each snack.

>Anyways why do you dislike taking pictures of yourself?
I don't like attentions in general, and I especially dislike getting attention because of my body. I don't feel bad about my appearance, I have a decent body and face. But taking pics of myself always seemed like pointless attention whoring.
I don't take selfies and only take pics with my friends if they really insist.

>>18022643
>1600 kcal a day
>Instead of having three meals I eat fruit and veggies every 2 hours
you get 1600kcal from fruit and veggies only?
that doesn't sound healthy... no wonder you have high blood sugar

He keeps wanting to fuck my ass and I'm just not up for it. It's not nice, I don't like it, and I don't want to do it. We finally spoke at length about it and he's fine with my backdoor being closed from now on.

Trouble is his ex was all about anal and I know he loves it. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. So in effect I've just gotten this boy to give up buttfucking forever, and when I think of it like that it sounds horrible. The new girl at his job is into him and she has really short hair and wears chokers so obviously her butt sees lots of traffic.
Seriously though, how would you guys feel about having a sex move you were used to and loved being taken off the menu, ostensibly forever?

>>18022687
I have LOW blood sugars because I have various hormonal dysfunctions.

I eat mostly veggies and fruits when I snack.
I have a fat-free greek yogurt with honey and nuts for breakfast, snack twice during the morning, have proteins for lunch, snack three times during the afternoon, have a big salad or other veggies for dinner, snack once before bed. My snacks consist of half an apple, half a banana, a slice of pineapple, a carrot, a small glass of smoothie with veggies and fruits, a cereal bar.
I swim for an hour four times a week.

>>18022518
Shit sorry for being late

Basically we met through mutual friends and hit it off really well, he arranged a date. Before the date he would text me everyday for hours and when we finally did meet it really went well.

Then he invited me over to his and we made out, I told him I'm still a virgin so we just ended up sleeping in bed. The next morning we had breakfast and watched TV for like two hours.

When he went to drop me off he told me about not wanting to be in a relationship, he just broke up with his girl a month ago etc. He also said he's hoping we have sex soon.

But then he still wanted to do this again, to date, to hang out with mutual friends and he kissed me in public.

I've never been in a relationship but it does seem strange, I'm pretty confused. It doesn't sound like a fuck buddy situation because I heard people just meet up for sex and that's it, no dating.

>>18022186
But the cheater think is then a lose lose scenario, isn't it? If I can't kiss a girl who has boyfriend, if I can't do any romantic gestures, then how do I compete? Are then all girls with boyfriend of limits?

Wait, that actually has sense

>>18022682

It's fine if you want someone to show interest in more than just the way you look but I wasn't asking you out. I was asking to see how your body looks, that's all.

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>>18022701
holy shit, now you're just trolling, right?
that sounds like a shitton of calories
are you really sure, they only add up to 1600?

>>18022710
I know! I didn't think you wanted to see my body to masturbate to it, it was a perfectly reasonable request.
It just makes me feel uncomfortable to take pics of myself in general. I dislike showing it off. Nothing personal, anyway.

>>18022702
That sounds like totally noral dating behaviour to be honest familia. But I guess it's seems odd if he's not interested in being with you on a more permanent basis. Maybe ask him about it? Like "I know you said you didn't want to be in a relationship but I kind of feel like you're treating me like your girlfriend so what's up doc? Also please keep doing that."
I assume you guys are adults so we can discount the possibility that he's just acting sweet to get in your pants.

>>18022715
>>18022701
just tell me how much greek yogurt with how much honey, how many nuts and what kind, what kinds of proteins for luch and how much, what salad and veggies and how much and what is in that fucking smoothie and how much you consume, then i can calculate what you consume a day

>>18022715
Oh my god, yes.
Half an apple is around 45-50 kcal, a slice of pineapple is about 40 kcal, half a banana is around 60 kcal. The cereal bar is 87 kcal. A carrot has 40 kcal. The smoothie I make has around 100-150 kcal for a glass.
My snacks are about usually 300-400 kcal in total.
Breakfast is about 200 kcals.

That leaves me 1000 kcal between lunch and dinner. Dinner is something around 200-300 kcal, I usually eat just a big bowl of green salad with no dressing.
So I have 700 kcal for lunch. Which I usually don't eat, because I go for something lighter.

>>18022725
Yeah we are adults, he's older than me too.

I mean if he doesn't want to give to a name to it I guess I'm fine with it, I just want to spend time with him.

Maybe the thing over the girlfriend bothers him? I do know my brother still has issues over commitment because of a horrible girlfriend he had years back.

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>>18022601
>>18022612
>>18022643

>>18022758
Love you anon.

I actually have bigger boobs, thinner waist and larger hips. And bigger thighs.
And I'm not blue.
But the rest is pretty on spot.

>>18022733

That's a pretty low calorie count you're going with. You've mentioned you've fainted before. I'd be concerned with getting all the nutrients you need like iron, calcium. Do you eat meat at all?

>>18022733
>I usually eat just a big bowl of green salad with no dressing.
That sounds incredibly bland.

>>18022733
>I have a fat-free greek yogurt with honey and nuts for breakfast, snack twice during the morning, have proteins for lunch, snack three times during the afternoon, have a big salad or other veggies for dinner, snack once before bed. My snacks consist of half an apple, half a banana, a slice of pineapple, a carrot, a small glass of smoothie with veggies and fruits, a cereal bar.

so you snack 6 times a day

that means according to your own numbers >>18022733:
>Half an apple is around 45-50 kcal, a slice of pineapple is about 40 kcal, half a banana is around 60 kcal. A carrot has 40 kcal.
you consume 6x(50+40+60+40)kcal=1140kcal in snacks alone

with your other caloric estimates being
>Breakfast is about 200 kcals
>Dinner is something around 200-300 kcal

you get 1540-1640 kcal

so you don't have an extra 700kcal for lunch, if you want it to add up; but as you said, you usually don't eat lunch

Would you date a guy that only has no active/creative hobbies?

Ex: I like to go on my phone and my computer but I don't really create anything or do physical activities

>>18022805
>>18022793
>>18022733
why even bother? You can just eat a fucking mountain of salad and you're fine
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DNgA06xE_Ng

>>18022793
It's not so low, I have a really sedentary lifestyle. I don't do much other than going to swim and walking to the grocery store.

I eat chicken 4 times a week usually, and beef once. Other two days I have beans or a legumes soup.

I fainted when I was younger because I didn't know about the blood sugar thing.
I used to eat a big lunch and a big dinner and then just don't snack. But it doesn't really work with my body - big meals make me feel shitty, especially big carb meals, and not snacking makes me faint.
My blood exams are great, I had a slightly low vitamin D and calcium but I take a supplement for it. Iron is perfect, everything else is great.

>>18022805
I fucking love salad. When I was a kid I used to eat lettuce in front of the tv while my sister ate chips.
It isn't even a sacrifice, I think it is fucking delicious. I eat like 2 servings.

At night I'm not super hungry, so salad it's usually enough.

>>18022823
I don't eat ALL the snacks together. The ones I listed are my go-to foods, not what I eat every time I snack.
In a whole day I usually have one apple, one banana, a cereal bar and a couple of slices of pineapple. But I divide them in 6 or 7 small snacks.

I do eat lunch every day, it's the moment of the day when I'm hungrier - and I just eat when I'm hungry.
I have usually between 1400-1600 kcal a day.

>>18022179
As a gay guy, the best dating advice has been from women. I have no idea why.

>>18022445
Strength is really kinda it, strength just means lots of different things now.

What hobbies and interests do you find interesting in other people?

>>18022850
>What hobbies and interests do you find interesting in other people?
>Interests
In general, I like when people share my interests or things I am interested in but never had a chance to study.
Politics (geopolitics and public policy, especially), history, medicine, physics, biology, astronomy, art, design, mythology, religion, psychology, philosophy, literature, sports.
But I will listen to someone talking about something they're passionate about in general, because people are cute when they're passionate about shit.

>Hobbies
Active stuff. Anything outdoorsy (hiking, camping, rock climbing, kayaking, whatever) or any sort of sport.
Artistic stuff, as long as you're good at it - writing, drawing, painting, singing, playing music.
Cooking.
Travelling.
Woodwork for some reason gives me the hots.

>>18022829

>I have a really sedentary lifestyle

Swimming several times a week is pretty good desu. And it's fun, unlike something like aerobics or lifting weights in a room full of sweaty people.

>>18022111
Not enjoying masturbation or not finding it important is not uncommon for women at all. Hell, some women can't make themselves climax.

I masturbate all the time but only learned how to properly get myself off at eighteen, before that I tried it maybe once a year.

As for whether there's disparity in masturbation drive and sex drive, I'm sure there's a correlation but it is possible. I also feel it is more common for women to have their sex drive whither a bit when they don't have someone around to be attracted to, and are caught up in other stuff in their life.

>>18022868
Are you a guy or a girl?

>>18022882

She's obviously a girl.

>>18022850

I think what you wanted to ask was "If I get a hobby that a lot of women like will it be easier to get one?"

>>18022882
>>18022883

Yes, I'm definitely a girl.

>>18022886

That's nice, would you like to go out with me?

>>18022445
First a disclaimer that the way I perceive sexuality is not how everyone sees it. But I can tell you what it is for me.

First there's the typical stuff. Penises are made for pussy as well, and the feeling of a hard penis is really... explicit and arousing if you're used to your own arousal, no matter how extreme, not really having a physical presence. There is also something in the feeling of a boner pressed up against you that calls to the reptile brain, like shit's about to go down.
Then there's the other physical stuff like men being bigger - a lot of typical female fantasies or turn ons have to do with surrender, and someone physically being larger is a sort of echo of that. Hell even if a guy isn't particularly tall compared to you, he will most likely still have bigger hands, feet, broader shoulders etc.

As for sexual appeal, "pretty" doesn't get me off. I'm up for sex with women but I'm not attracted to women either if they look like perfect little dolls. It's boring to me, superficial, strangely immature. When I fuck someone I want that dirty element, not just within the sex we have but within them. There's a sort of friction when you don't find something (in my personal taste, say, rampant bodyhair) particularly aesthetic or anything, but for whatever reason you still really like it sexually. That pull-push to me is much stronger and more enticing than simply finding something 100% pleasant. Like the difference between eating something sugary sweet and something that mixes good pleasant flavors with something tangy that adds depth.

That's not to say I'm only attracted to burly furry guys, but it's the easiest to explain. I also like more girlish boys, but it is less easy to verbalize why I prefer them over girls sexually. Then you come to the part of simply being wired towards men or women, I guess. But if you're talking what the sexual appeal of raw masculinity is, that's the above for me.

>>18022445
>As for guys all we really have is strength

I'm a guy and I try to be pretty and I do all the preening a girl would (hair removal etc.)

Apart from the boobs there's nothing you mentioned that is really necessarily limited to women.

>>18022892

I don't think you're as different as you might think. I've heard these things mentioned by other women as well. Maybe not exactly framed the same way but similar.
It's hard for a guy to understand that his looks don't matter as much as he thinks, because that is pretty much the no.1 thing we look for in a woman.

>>18022892
Also wanted to add that of course, many women who are really really straight are simply grossed out by the idea of being near a naked woman. Yes they are soft, but that is not necessarily a good thing - if you are looking with the cold, objective gaze of someone with no attraction to women at all, if she's not 100% trim and perky then that means there's an awful lot of quivering going on when she moves around, fatty flesh giving way when you touch it, a softness that is more limp than elastic in some places.

And for the record, I know for a fact that not all women experience male appeal like this, and some simply find men prettier than women. There is no reason to not find the male body superior, it is a matter of Zeitgeist, the ancient Greek found men more aesthetic. There is a very simple and graceful beauty in the inverted V-shape of a healthy young man, they build muscle quicker and have a leaner look even when compared to a slender woman. And I think many women simply have a preference for more angular faces with defined jawlines, and find many average looking female faces kind of droopy.

Personally I love male bodies but I do think a hot, well shaped female body looks better. I guess for a significant part because I have seen gorgeous (near) naked women being held up as the epitome of beauty my entire life. And I always kind of felt like women are a more cohesive whole, like the male ass is kind of out of place on their body for example.
I'd still rather see a naked guy but it's because of a personal soft spot and not because I'd rate the general look higher if I tried to be objective.

I hope this gives you some idea.

Also honestly I feel like I'm no less cute than a lot of women objectively speaking. Just being a female doesn't make someone pretty or special.

>>18022892
>>18022906

I wish I could bend you over my desk right now

>>18022445
I think girls are much nicer to look at, but I don't feel sexual desire for them - I like them aesthetically, but they don't work for me.

I love my boyfriend's body. I think his body is really attractive itself, but more than everything I love the way I feel around him - his masculinity enhances my femininity. I feel tiny and small, frail, sexy, safe.
I love the way he smells, the way he moves, his voice. Fuck, I'd listen to him talk for days, or just stare at him when he shaves his beard.
And sex with a guy just feels right for me. Having his boner pressed against me, feeling him inside me, the weight of his body or the sounds he makes when he cums... so fucking sexy.

>>18022906
> I guess for a significant part because I have seen gorgeous (near) naked women being held up as the epitome of beauty my entire life.

Yeah. It's all just because men control things economically and have the increased sex drive that the culture has ended up this way. If it were the opposite you'd see men being the sex objects. There's no such thing as objective beauty.

>>18022905
Didn't try to pass it off as a minority opinion, but for one thing you can just never be sure how many people agree as this is a pretty individual and usually subconscious part of your perception. Secondly as I mentioned in the second post I do not think men are more aesthetic than women when I know for a fact that this is not an uncommon point of view for women to have - although, once again, there's no way to be sure about proportions there.

I do think that women as a whole care a lot less about appearance for general sexiness than men do. Even just the voice and way of moving, posture, way of carrying himself instantly catch a woman's attention. Sure men also prefer a girl with nice posture but I don't feel like it bleeds into each other as much. Eg a guy might think "she's so cute, too bad no one told her to not slump her shoulders like that" and a woman sees a guy with great posture and immediately pays more attention to his face and how he behaves without realizing that it was his physical presence that already gave him higher priority right off the bat.

Generally I feel like this also goes for appearance vs personality/skills. Look at someone like Leonard Cohen, at most an average looking superJewish dude, who was regarded as crazily sexy throughout his life.

>>18022179
I never ask other men for advice.
But i'd guess they would be the same kind that women had give me "just do it", which in retrospective got me a gf at some point. However, at realize later than being in a relationship is something that a person like me doesn't enjoy beyond the honey moon period, so getting advises for that isn't something I like to talk openly about anyone to be honest and I just try to go with whatever fits me best.

>>18022920
>Look at someone like Leonard Cohen, at most an average looking superJewish dude, who was regarded as crazily sexy throughout his life.

I think that brings out another point about what women like though. Which is what other women like. My anecdotal evidence is from watching female coworkers though so I might be wrong.

>>18022914
Nice.

>>18022927
I don't really think that's the whole story. First to women liking men that other women like, that is largely true. My personal theory is that men outgrow this more quickly (if you look at middle school boys, they're also all into the same girls - it's scary to admit being attracted to someone your friends dislike because you might get laughed at for a very vulnerable and intimate feeling) because they have a more pressing sex drive and are motivated by that to broaden their horizon and see the appeal of many different women.
And practically speaking, women have more reason to be cautious. You can pull the biological argument that they need to be selective because he might be babydaddy, or the argument that it is just more likely that the man harms her than the other way around. Then it's socially discouraged for women to be "too much" into men, so that really leaves little incentive to soul search and reach your full potential in terms of what you find attractive and what wildly different men you might enjoy. So I feel typically female attraction is more "stunted" in that regard.

But when it comes to Cohen, he was dating some gorgeous women without ever being famous, not because he looked hot but because he was clearly really into women and was exceptionally talented and intelligent, and someone with a strong drive and ambitions. Women love men who stand out in some way and distinguish themselves, even if they fall for a completely average guy they typically make up a narrative about how he's a catch because the specific combination of everyday qualities he has is fairly rare.

>>18022933
>without ever being famous
*before ever being famous, obviously

>>18022906
And I'm realizing now that I forgot to include, like I feel how a lot of men are drawn in part to the paradox of a woman who's pretty and innocent looking having dirty fantasies and doing animalistic things, there's a similar paradox between the sort of bravado of male sexuality as it is typically portrayed and acted out, and the vulnerability of being naked with someone you want to impress and the loss of control/helplessness that comes with being really turned on.

It is in part really intimate to be with your lover and have them behave in a way (like making a whimpering noise before they catch themselves) they would not want any other soul to witness, and in part just really hot because of how far it's removed from the porn universe where men are stoic fuckbots. Being the active partner (whether you're doing something dominant or submissive) when the entire societal narrative paints men to be the active partners and women to receive attention and pleasure feels very, for lack of a better word, real and almost naughty.

Obviously it depends on the dude how much they can let go and how much they care about decorum... but even if you never make noise and don't want to do any act you see as submissive, there's the fact that she sees what your face looks like when you have an orgasm etc.

Asking women.
Would you turn a guy down if you found out he stuffs his crotch to give the illusion of a big penis?
Went on tinder date with a girl. She was really into me. But i was too scared to make a sexual advance because i had a large carrot taped to my inner thigh. Idk how to bring this up before sex and ive been doing it for the last 2 years because it boosts my confidence in everyday life.

>>18022692
compromise a little, if you really care about him he should be worth it.
Why exactly you don't like it? does it hurt?

What is the best way to ask out a friend?

"Wanna go out with me?" or should I straight up say, "I like you"?

>>18022955
This has to be a troll...

>>18022955
dude wtf, stop doing that.

>>18022962
are you a boy or a girl?

>>18022962
I'd go for a middle road. I mean, you're friends, so it doesn't exactly come natural to drop it on her that you'd like to go out. But saying you full on like her is perhaps too enthusiastic if she's never given any encouraging signs.

Something like, I think we click really well and that you're a great girl, would you like to go out with me sometime? If not, you can play it off more casually than if you full on professed feelings.

>>18022933

Still, I think women are more prone to idolizing a celebrity than men are. It's rare for men to like something just because other men do and it's usually not a woman. They might like the idea of competing over a woman's attention, but that's another thing entirely.
Also I get the feeling women don't go for these strong men so much because of who they are but more because of how it makes them feel about themselves.

>>18022692

This was funny to read but stop.

>>18022967
I'm a girl and my friend is a lesbian.

>>18022968
This is helpful, thanks. I have no idea if she likes me or not so I'll try to downplay my feelings.

>>18022970
Those are not mutually exclusive. A celebrity is someone, compared to an average person. Even if he is not famous because he is very attractive or talented, just him being rich means more than that he doesn't hurt for money personally - it means that he moves in circles that trigger the imagination, that he could make her do/see things that are spectacular and glamorous compared to her everyday life. And you are made to sympathize with them through interviews and what not, whereas strangers you meet in real life are more like a blank canvas, especially when they are shy and don't really express themselves in groups.
Basically I think the process is more that many women like celebrities for the same reasons, than that the reason is literally the fact that other women like him. Not denying that people have a conformist streak but I think that plays a much smaller role there.

Eh, that's hard to separate. It's always twofold. Men also like a beautiful girlfriend both because he gets to look at and sleep with her, and because he gets to walk around being her boyfriend and gets elevated status in the eyes of his friends/peers. It is impossible to really separate where either one ends and the other one begins. Even for the personal involved it can be hard to disentangle those feelings.

>>18022692
>Seriously though, how would you guys feel about having a sex move you were used to and loved being taken off the menu, ostensibly forever?
That would literally never happen. I like buttsex and I have a small dick. Every chick I've banged ended up begging for it in the ass so they could feel something.

>>18022982
>I'm a girl and my friend is a lesbian.
just take her to your home and fuck the shit out of her.

>>18022982
Does she know you as someone who's into women? If not, you might need to do/say a bit more to convince her that you're really into her and not just trying to cross something off the bucket list.

>>18022965
Not a troll. I just wanna know if their is women out their that would be undestanding. Shit i wouldnt care if a girl stuffs her bra or butt.

>>18023000
Yeah, that's pretty weird to an autistic level.
Stop doing that.

>>18023000
Okay I'm willing to run with this but first of all, when you say it makes you more confident in "everyday life", how in the world does it help your confidence to walk around with a raging fake boner? That seems pretty awkward.

Either way, it's not really the same as stuffing a bra or jeans (which men typically don't appreciate either if she's gone all out) because while it might make her less attractive in their eyes, it doesn't directly correlate to the pleasure or lack thereof in penetration. But most of all you set her up for a really awkward situation. And don't forget that push up clothing (or lift shoes or whatever) is really integrated in society, whereas if you really do/did this carrot business then you are basically showing that you are so insecure that you are going out of your way (and out of social norms) to try to compensate. That in itself is alarming.

Thought i got along with girl on a coffee date that ended up being 3 hours long.

Texted her the following day, telling her i enjoyed it and was looking for a second date but its been like 8 hours with no response and shes seen the text.

>>18022957
It hurts, it's uncomfortable, and it just feels plain wrong. I get this sense of wrongness like when someone digs in your belly button with their finger. Sends shivers through my entire body but not in the good sense.

>>18022973
Stop what

>>18022984
Congratulations, I think?

Girls, why doesn't it bother you that your bf has gotten intimate with other girls? It's such a big source of jealousy but I notice more men bothered by it.

>>18023003
Well it works well to get womans attention. And i didn't ask you if it autistic. But i get it. Guess ill just start saving for penis enlargment.

Girls and guys

What's the best ways to ignore our natural instinct for sex and affection?

Please don't suggest fapping. I do that once every 5 days or so. But I don't want to do it any more than that

>>18023014
Maybe you can start touching yourself there and find ways to enjoy it?
As a man I would find really flattering that the girl I'm dating is putting a lot effort into something just to make me happy.
You don't really have to do anything of this, he seems to be ok with it, and in the long run isn't really that important. But it would be a really nice gesture from you if you did.

>>18023018
Stop looking at porn, don't spend too much time alone in your room. Focus in other thing like work/school and if you can try to do stuff outside instead of indoors. Exercising is also a good way to do it.
That said, these are only ways to keep your mind busy so you won't default to your primitive sense.
A better question would be, why would you want that in the first place?

>>18023008
Ok keep your horrible double standard. You think the attractiveness of a womans body doesnt make sex better?

>>18023015
I feel like in general men are not really comfortable with the thought of their girlfriend being into men in general (as opposed to just them). Men seem to be much more grossed out by other men than women are, so it seems to be kind of a "my farts smell good but everyone else's farts are disgusting" type of situation where they feel picturing another man with her is like picturing her being tainted.

I just can't relate to that at all. The idea that a man I like stuck his dick in another vagina evokes as much emotion in me as the idea that he had diarrhea at some point. In fact, as long as I'm 100% secure that he's not hung up on anything, I like having my partners tell me sexual experiences. It feels safe and close to me to hear them narrate intimate personal experiences within the safety of our relationship, and I like hearing about their life before I met them, part of that wanting to know everything about someone urge when you're in love.

Sure I would get turned off if I felt my partner had slept with too many people, but not because of any physical association but because the associated lifestyle or the amount of effort he put into meaningless sex is a turn off to me.

Not really sure what else to say, I feel if anything it makes more sense to be jealous of past love. After all, you are not with someone just because they let you fuck them, right? It's the feelings that are supposed to be special.

Also I want to add, I had a strong crush on a guy when I was younger, and while I knew him he lost his virginity. I absolutely was jealous of that because I had wanted to share that moment with him but now 100% definitely would never be able to. But I can't imagine feeling that way again, also because I have experienced first hand that it doesn't stop feeling scary and exciting and new when you fall for someone else. Sex isn't like a static skill you have to learn once and then master forever.

>>18023030

I haven't looked at porn in maybe 6 months. I even deleted my Facebook so I have less urges from seeing cute girls.

>why would you want that in the first place?

For some reason girls cause me a great amount of stress if it's past a normal platonic context. I had a date on Friday, and the entire week before the date I was a wreck. It's been like that everytime. I don't need this stress in my life. I have too much important shit I'm trying to accomplish. So I don't want girls to interfere with that.

>>18022068
please work
Test post

>>18023037
Don't you ever get upset and think "she had sex with MY man"?, that sort of thing?

>>18023032
Not in the literal way that her vaginal tightness makes sex better, no.

>>18023037
The issue for me isn't the thought of a woman having fucked a lot of dudes, but I've gotten terribly jealous thinking about her previous relationships. Treasured memories, emotions, moments shared with someone else that she'll always carry with her, that I'm competing with. It's not entirely rational but it is what it is.

>>18023015
>implying

I wouldn't have chosen my guy if he wasn't also a virgin. There are people of both genders on both sides of that.

>>18023054
No, because then he's with me. What does she get out of having fucked him at some point? Some nice memories, at most. It's not nearly as concrete (and valuable, to me) as sleeping besides that person and still fucking them.

He wasn't "my man" when he had sex with her, that's kind of the point. And if he wasn't an independent thinking and acting human being who chose to live his life as he deemed fit, if he were my little sexual puppydog that had no life beyond being my lover, I would not be attracted to him.

If anything, if you're talking about powertrips, I enjoy the feeling of one upping past partners and being the better lover.

But I think it also plays a role that in general a man sleeping with a woman isn't necessarily seen as him approving of her much. It's kind of accepted that men will fuck any non-deformed woman who will spread for him (in fact, much more accepted/assumed than is realistic, I think), so that doesn't really make having gotten laid by that specific man something to brag about.

>>18023063
See, this I can understand better intuitively. I guess the sad thing is that it only seems a lot to you now. Imagine if this woman you were crazy about suddenly dumped you and you saw pictures of her nuzzling the neck of another man pop up online... would you feel triumphant that you got to have those experiences with her? 99% likely it would feel like nothing but a painful reminder of what you lost.

To anyone I guess.

There's a new girl at work and I find her attractive but I missed my opportunity to chat her up twice so far. I have this stupid thing that I do when I am into a girl which is to become all broody and serious. Also to start interpreting every little gesture as a sign they are into me or not. The first two days there she was wearing raggedy clothes and her hair looked pretty messy which I found strangely attractive. She greeted me with a big smile once which I replied with my usual stern angry face and didn't say a word pass that. I kept looking over and caught her glance several times but she never smiled or anything that would give anything away. Third day she had her hair done and was wearing one of those glitter blouses. It's funny that I found her unkempt self much more attractive than when she really put some effort, maybe because I'm insecure and want someone as messed up as I am. Anyway, we didn't greet each other at all that day but when I sat down at a computer she didn't come and pester the woman colleague that was across from me which she found weird and I of course over-analyzed as I always do.
I wish I talked to her on the first day but since that has come and passed how do I go about approaching her. We don't really intersect much so there no reason to come up with to do it and I don't want to make it awkward. Should I just wait for a chance?
I feel like it's stupid getting this worked up over someone I don't even know yet!

>>18023071
Yeah I'd wait for a natural chance. If you happen to have a good opportunity (like both waiting for the coffee machine or something) ask her if she enjoys the work, what she used to do etc.

And yeah you overthink way too much but there's no magic cure for that.

>>18023071
>wah i avoided her now wat do

just make an excuse to swing by where she works and see if you can work things out

that's what i did, but she was super uninterested

>>18022993
lel

>>18022996
I've been dropping hints that I like women, but I'm bi. How can I seem genuine without dropping truckloads of spaghetti?

>>18023015
There are layers to this. At least for me there are.

My boyfriend has zero contact with his exs. He has told me why they broke up. It relieves me of jealous thoughts to know why it didn't work out. I know already that sex and intimacy is not everything in a relationship. Even though I was intimate with my ex, he is still a fucking psycho and it ended terribly.


For hook ups, I feel like it's a little different. Within bf's friend circle, he has fooled around with a few in high school. He claims to have not had sex with them out of performance anxiety, that I do not know if it is true and don't really want to know.

The issue with hooking up with girls that he knew and having dated bf for several years is that it seems like a small handful of the girls he hooked up with are really mean to me. It seems like they relish in the fact that bf hooked up with them first despite no relationship coming from it. One of them used to complain about me and ask if I was hotter than her. It drove me crazy inside that she was challenging me. But bf always shut her down.


That's not the case with all of them though. A girl my bf hooked up with over 12 years ago is now one of my closest friends. I mean, it was 12 years ago when they were in high school. It's meaningless if that many years were to go by with no dating and no hooking up again. Not only that, she showed no pettiness to me. She's sweet.

1. Girls of /adv/, which of these kinds of sex do you prefer?
a) affectionate (with lots of cuddling and caressing, not necessarily romantic);
b) rough (hair pulling, slaps, BDSM);
c) romantic (slow, with lots of kisses, sweet words);
d) all of the above.

2. As a guy who likes option "a" 90% of the time, will I be able to satisfy a girl?

>>18023089
For the future, tell her about a woman you were in love with or wanted to have/had sex with. That makes it pretty obvious and if she has any questions, you can deal with them right away.

For now, I'd stick to just asking her out and if she shows surprise, just be frank and tell her you hinted a bit but are not sure if you were clear enough, you're actually into both men and women. You can't 100% eliminate potential distrust but that's all you can do, as your friend you'd hope she'll give you the benefit of the doubt even if she otherwise wouldn't. Cheers!

>>18023089

Has it been going on for long? The more you wait the bigger the chances for spaghetti because she probably has no clue what you're going through and you will build up some weird narrative that's completely out of touch with reality.

>>18022364
leave her and fuck a bunch of chicks

>>18023064
Well, I rarely see girls talk about it, but to be fair i don't know many girls.

The older I get the more I think men are the romantics and women just want a good dirty fuck. Especially with the new generation of "men" that were raised by mothers and shitty Hollywood love stories.

>>18023095
None of the above is my favorite. I like sex that is affectionate (lots of skin on skin contact, cuddling/caressing), playful (teasing, smiles, nibbling etc) and vanilla-dirty, don't know how else to call this (lots of dirty talk, groping/smacking in a non-dominant way, intense succession of different acts/positions, sloppy making out and being relaxed about bodily fluids).

Not sure what you'd fit that into but I guess most like A out of them all. I can't talk for other women but I've never met a woman who solely liked rough sex, if that's anything to go by.

>>18023095
1. I prefer affectionate sex and rough sex. It's generally more on the affectionate side when we're in female-dominant positions (pretty much anything with me on top). And he is a lot more rough when he is in control. I like the contrast.

Slow sex bothers me. I'd rather have bf be romantic with me outside of the bedroom.
2. I would be. Bf and I mostly have sex with me being in control and I'm the more affectionate one.

In the beginning though, I remember my bf and I were less affectionate. Just took a while to get to that level. We didn't just start out affectionate.

>>18023099
Thank you!

>>18023100
It's been going on for months and I'm completely infatuated with her. That's why I wanted to know the best way to ask, so it wouldn't be too melodramatic and out of the blue.

>>18023095
I like them all, I don't have a super strong preference.
Sometimes I like it a bit kinky (never painful tho), sometimes I want him to kiss me and cuddle me, sometimes I want it slow and romantic.
It all works for me.

While will women rarely (never) make the first step? It's pissing me off. They'll beat around the bush and do borderline crazy shit but never straight up ask you out.

>>18023133

while=why

Ok girls, this is going to be a long text so bare with me.
Some time ago I was invited by one of my (25M) coworkers (30F) to her place to "watch movies".
So I went to spend a saturday night there, she had a big tv in from of her bed, and her bed was big enough for both of us to fit comfortably.
We started watching a movie, at this point we were pretty much each one in their own side of the bed,
there wasn't any physical contact at this point, in the middle of the movie she had to get up and then come back to the room, when she returned I moved to
the center of the bed and made a gesture indicating that I wanted her lay in top of me, she did and for the rest of the movie I was lying in my back while she
was spooning in my right side while resting her head in my shoulder/chest. While we were like that I used my right hand to caress her, specially focusing on
her back, her hips and I even played with the elastic of her underwear but in a really superficial level.. also my right leg was entangled between her legs.
We started watching another movie in pretty much the same positions, but some time halfway through it she got sleepy and just curled away from me and went to sleep..
I tried to caress her a little but she seemed annoyed and trying to sleep so I decided not to bother her anymore and went to sleep in my side of the bed.
The next morning, we laid in bed for a while, she was more responsive to my touch this time and I caress her abdomen a little. She then said she was going to make breakfast, I told her not to bother preparing for two because I was leaving and I left immediately.
For a bit of context, at this point I felt that she was just a cock tease and I was really frustrated so I didn't want to spend anymore time with her.
In retrospective, I think I missed a huge chance there. Needless to say she never invited me over again.
So Girls, what do you think I should have done in this situation?

[continue..]

>>18023138
I really wanted to kiss her without saying a think and see how she would react, but I started thinking that if she didn't want it, the rest of the night would be just awkward and since we were coworker I didn't wan't rumors about me being a rapist or something spreading at work.
I also was thinking in asking her "do you want to do it?", which might had let to the same conclusion but at least I wouldn't have "forced myself" upon her.
I want to know this because if I am in the same situation again I want to know what to do.

>>18023133
First of all, it's scary. Plenty of guys don't even make the first step and would rather miss their chance than have to put themselves out there. For women it's a more viable strategy still to shield themselves from facing rejection.

Secondly, because it's the norm that men make the first move, there's a lot of room for prejudice (he'll think I'm easy or crazy if I ask him out, men all want a girl they "won" themselves) and insecurity (isn't it telling that he hasn't asked if the guy's supposed to ask? is he just not responding to my hints because he's trying to politely let me down?).

>>18023113
>>18023116
>>18023130
OK, this makes me more comfortable with my sex preference.
I am unable to like really rough sex/domestic violence.

>>18023133
Because rejection and embarrassment. I know men have to endure the same but it is more socially acceptable for you because it is expected for men to be turned down at some point.

Most women are taught they are a prize to be chased. My mom attempted to implant into my head that every man who tries to woo me better put me on a pedestal and act like he deserves me.


Personally, I just like to cut the bullshit and ask because I will never know if I don't ask. I have been rejected before though. Never given a reason why and it was awkward. But I got over it even though the people I asked seem to still have not (several years later and it's still awkward). I did ask my current bf out on a date and we've been together for about 6 years now. I didn't want him to get away.

>>18023133
>While will women rarely (never) make the first step?
Women almost always take the first step. You're just too autistic to notice.


Seriously, google IOI or something.

>>18023143
>>18023138

Guy here.
It sounds like you were waiting for her to give you a green light. Well she did. The moment she invited you over and cuddled against you. Trying to kiss her or hinting at sex at this point is not sexual harassment. It's not like you went over at her desk at work and groped her.
The worst that could've happened would have been her saying she's not ready for that. Next time go with your gut and be more assertive. I'm guessing you wanted to sleep with her.

>>18023138
Imo men typically have this more black and white attitude where sex=win and everything else is a useless waste of time. As a woman sex is much easier to come by (even if just in theory and more difficult in practice) and they more often seem to appreciate "just" making out or some touching.

It's impossible to analyze what went through her head. I mean it's pretty suggestive to invite someone over for movies and then lay on your bed together. Maybe she was conflicted herself. But you absolutely looked butthurt to her because she wouldn't put out right away and that did turn her away from inviting you over again. It seems to me like she wasn't really looking for a straight away full on one night stand and was annoyed that you did several things in a row to try to instigate sex. As for why she did want to cuddle up, can be anything from being kind of aroused but not wanting to act on it for whatever reason, to wanting some intimacy but not straight up fucking, to not daring to say no.

I don't think you had a great chance, at this pace I think at most she was hoping you could eventually date or something. If she was her strategy was pretty crooked but okay.

Good that you did not kiss her. If she didn't want it that's already pretty shitty. I don't think there's anything wrong with asking where the night is heading, but straight up asking if she wants to "do it" isn't really arousing. Next time (with someone else) try to go for some teasing, ask her what she has in mind, whether she enjoys getting your hopes up etc. Interact with her, play around with her. Try to make her want sex instead of trying to make her have sex.

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>>18023163
>IOI

I wasn't looking for k-pop recommendations.

>>18023168
Also for the record with the kissing thing I meant kissing her on the mouth. With the level of contact already there, kissing her neck or something would've been fine.

Also read the other comment and I do agree that it's possible that she wanted you to make a stronger move. The reason why that didn't seem likely to me right away is lack of response while you were caressing her (or you left it out) and shooting down the actual moment when sex was most likely to happen, when she "wanted to sleep" and you came on to her.

I mean, in theory it's possible that she wanted you to go for it and then got annoyed/turned off that you didn't do it fast enough... that just seems a bit weird to me especially for someone her age with a younger guy. But as I mentioned there is no way to know what exactly went on with her.

I still think the best thing you can do is focus more on how to do foreplay-foreplay that isn't just physical. That's how you can typically tell whether she wants to or not. If she's giggling and looking at you with starry eyes, then you can go in for a kiss yes. So steer towards that.

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>>18023175

>>18023152
You're not alone. First responder, I'm not big on rough stuff whatsoever (name calling, spitting, slapping - if someone tried to choke me by surprise I would make him fucking regret that) and it annoys me that it's portrayed as so normal. It's actually kind of scary to me how much "normal" porn for men involves degrading women and hurting them. I don't see what's sexy about that at all.

Pretty sure my coworker is scared of me and I have no idea why. What should I do?

>refuses to look at me unless forced to
>stays as far away from me as possible without looking weird about it
>will not talk to me unless forced to

It's kind of offensive, I get along with everyone but her, what's the big deal?

>>18023213

Why don't you ask her?
That can mean a lot more things than her being scared of you. What gave you that idea?

Why is it that women seemingly throw all their morals out the window when it comes to sex? As long as they feel it's safe to do so/they won't be exposed.

>>18023225
You don't think men do the same?

>>18023225
I mean. What are you exactly asking? Why women enjoy rough sex?

>implying I wont ask people to interpret situations they have no knowledge of to me

So I went to a a few dates, third one she invited me to watch movie at her place. She didn't give any signs like touching me or leaning against me so I didn't try to advance towards sex or anything (also because I pussied out). Being somewhat confused as to what she thinks of me I just texted her asking just that, also told her straigt up that I like her and think she's good looking and would have not minded if thing went further between us that evening.

So she told me she likes being with me. She invited me to watch tv or stuff with her tomorrow at 9pm or so. I liker her, I'd like to get physical with her but while she doesn't seem to mind me touching her while telling a joke and now she even straight up said she likes me, but I just feel nervous about escalating things physically since she hasn't really iniated physical contact with me. I know I know, just put my arm around her and then I'll find out right, easy as that I know, I don't need her to take the initiative but I just wish she'd give some form of "okay" so that I don't have to do things out of the blue. What does it all meeaaan

>>18023225
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
>Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.

Morality is subjective. That's also your answer.

>>18022540
When you meet someone you click with, it just happens.

It's called falling for a reason. It's not something you can prepare for, it'll happen when you don't expect it.

>>18023168
>>18023187

I was thinking about talking her into it, but remember that we were watching movies, so talking over the movies didn't seem like a appropriate thing to do. And by the time the movies were over she was already trying to sleep.
I could have a better chance and talk to her about it in the morning, but as I said, I was really frustrated for many reasons. First, we didn't do anything and was up to it. Second, although she was responsive to my touch, it was only me doing the caressing and she never really did something similar back, so I thought it was a really one sided thing and felt really uncomfortable pushing for something she was ambiguous on wanting.
I meant, if she wanted something to happen she could just reciprocate a little and move forward from there. But I felt like I was begging for sex all the time and she was just teasing me to no end. So i decided to not play her game and leave.

>>18023285
Nah I completely agree that she should've been a lot more pro-active if she was actually looking to get laid. Which is what made my first thought that she was probably enjoying the attention and affection without necessarily wanting to do the whole package.

>>18023283

And she will break your heart.

Yes I'm bitter.

>>18022885
No, I'm a girl and I'm seeing someone already, I'm asking out of curiosity

>>18022883
Thought so

>>18023225
Wut. I've never gone against my morals for sex or anything related.

>>18023133
Personally I've never needed to. I became attracted to the only person I've ever been interested in after he started pursuing me. I think the confidence it takes to do that alone is often what sparks attraction in many girls.

How do i take a hang out from smoking and Netflix to fucking? Ive never gone out of my way to "hookup" so i donteven know where to begin. We both enjoy each others company and I'm pretty sure she doesn't want a relationship but she definitely seems to be the type to want the guy to initiate everything.

>>18023055
Much rather bang a good looking loose girl than a tight whale or paddle board

ladies

if you found out a guy has a sex toy (synthetic vagina), what would you think of him?

That is, if he did not blatantly tell you and you stumbled upon it.

How would this reaction be if you two were in a relationship?

>>18023472
I'd probably think less of him, ngl

>>18023216
>walking past her
>she hugs the wall despite there being 5 feet between us

>wide, clearly scared eyes everytime she has to look at me

>walk into a room, accidentally make eye contact, looks away fast

I don't ask her because it's pretty clear she wants nothing to do with me, and I try to respect that.

>>18023472
My first reaction would be... awkwardness. A lot.
I don't like toys in general, toys for males make me feel extra weird tho.

I'd eventually get over it, but at first it'd make me feel REALLY weird.

>>18023474
but chicks with dildos is ok?

ayo double standards

>>18023472
>hahaha wow
>i wonder how it feels compared to me

i'm p sure that's how guys think of dildos too

>>18023481
Who said I have a dildo?

>>18023481
>If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
But you were just looking to pick a fight, weren't you?

>>18023482
We don't think much of dildos.

>>18023483
Who said you don't?

>>18023488
I have the money and don't even masterbate that often (like once a month), and if I did I would rather have it feel closer to real sex than wankin it with cheeto stained fingers like I'm fucking the cheetah man.

Double standards were always a thing, so I should have expected as much

Girls of /adv/, have you ever tried cummy ice cream? Would you like to?

People of /adv/, have you ever applied sweets on your partner and licked it off?

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Sorry for the long post, but did I miss my shot?

I started hanging out with this girl, under the assumption she had no boyfriend. She had a boyfriend, so I stopped hanging out with her, but talked with her. She would ask me to pick her up from school and stuff, and I said maybe I would. Anyways, I ask her occasionally and she usually declines. Okay cool, so we haven't hung out for a while. She's up for anything she said, and I usually ask and she's declines or says she's doing something.

So I just stop, I send snapchat in general to people of random shit I do, so it's not like I don't know her.

Anyways, did I miss my chance? Or should I try my chances a couple more times?

>>18023593
I'd eat it if it was a huge turn on for a man I loved. Not particularly enthusiastic about the idea in itself, though. I'm not easily grossed out by bodily fluids but licking something in the middle of steamy sex and taking it out of that context and applying a wad of it on something as an ingredient registers in a pretty different way.

Never did that, I did give a blowjob using tea once though, but I doubt that's really what you meant.

>>18023603
>using you to get favors
>in a relationship
>rejects offers to spend time

Doesn't sound like there was much of a chance honestly.

>>18023625
Well I forgot to mention she broke up with her boyfriend. And I wasn't seeking a relationship, probably just a little fun, because I'm leaving for boot camp soon. And desu, I only offered rides when I was in the area running an errand. I wasnt asking everyday lmao.

>>18023637
This might be a regional thing because I'm not American and public transport is very good here, but asking someone for a ride (unless you happen to live right next to each other or something) to me is something you do with family, romantic partners or very close friends. Not just some guy you happen to know, at least not without making it clear right away that you're going to compensate him on gas etc.

But if you just want something casual, I'd just hit her up again. Talk about boot camp and make it very clear that you're leaving soon. Lets her know low key that she doesn't have to worry about things taking a wrong turn, it's a pretty ideal set up for a fling. What's the worst case scenario here? Seems like it's worth a shot.

The girls like more gentlemans or bad boys?

>>18023657
I mean, I just told her to come with me to get a breakfast burrito from a local diner, so I'll see if she replies to my snapchat.

I think she knows I leave to boot camp soon, because she knows I enlisted. So idk where this all leads.

>>18023665
Gentlemen > bad boys > "nice guys"

>>18023671
Even teenagers?

>>18023665

girls want strong men they cant have their way with. Bad boys appear to be strong so insecure girls go for them.

Real 10/10 in terms of looks and mindset wouldnt go out with "bad boys" because they know how to avoid insecure, abusive people.

Nice guys are just insecure weaklings this is why they dont get any pussy.

>>18023665
Regular, self-respecting men who are sweet to her and make her feel loved, but don't "respect" her too much to call her out on her shit (or push her around in the bedroom) are all time favorite.

>>18023439
Start with being handsy and kissing. Escalate.

>>18023680
Ahah be a gentleman until get the bedroom. Seems well!!

>>18023665
Gentleman in the streets, bad boy in the sheets. Fulfill both the "dad and cad" role. It's the same with girls fulfilling the lady and freak roles. Be pure but a slut only for your one guy.

Im a virgin and idk how is the best way to turn on a girl before a sexual relation.

>>18023665
I mean, obviously people are more complex than those labels.

I get annoyed by too much chivalry, but any guy who tries to act like some douche lady killer is equally annoying.

The issue with the gentleman thing, I mean, I can open a door myself, but if you grab it first do it. It's annoying if a guy makes a run for the door just to open it for me. It just feels like the chivalry thing makes you think you know what I want. And you are shooting yourself in the foot by grouping me with all women. I don't want to be in the "all women" category to my potential boyfriend.


When a "bad boy" does his typical thing, he is also treating me the same way he'd treat "all women" by bragging, being slightly douchey, etc.

Basically, I want companionship and connection out of relationships, and when guys treat me in a stereotypical manner, you aren't approaching me like you want to know me, you're approaching me like you want *a* girlfriend. When you act stereotypically, it comes off as a wall. That's not you, that's how you've been trained to treat me. If that makes any sense.

>>18023715
There's always going to be some personal preferences, but this is what foreplay most typically looks like:

>you are kissing each other, smiling at each other etc
>the kisses turn into a passionate make out session where you're grabbing each other
>you move your hands to her ass, or knead her breasts (through her clothes or by slipping a hand inside her bra underneath them)
>some minor dirty talk ("god I want you")
>clothes come off, you undress her
>now there's any amount and variation of the following: oral sex on you, oral sex on her, fingering, jerking you, her fingering herself or you jerking yourself, fondling, assplay, grinding
>once you're both very heated you proceed to have sex

It depends on the girl what her favorite foreplay and way to be touched is, as well as how much time she needs to be properly warmed up for penetration. Foreplay can take up to twenty minutes, porn is entirely unrepresentative in this regard. And be aware that the vagina is always moist and this does not mean she's wet. If she is actually wet you won't feel moistness but real fluid when touching the vagina.

>>18023718
I never thinked in that way

People, please: >>18023593

>>18023715
fart into her pussy

>>18023731
That's just my opinion on these things. Some women love to be treated by a gentlemen. Some women get a rush from dating a bad boy.

I am just a bit jaded from experiences and prefer a bit of bluntness on people's personalities from the start

Pretty general question here from a guy, what do I do if a girl doesnt text back? A friend told me to text her again in a few days about a different topic, but I don't want to come off as clingy or whatever. I see her pretty regularly through our mutual classes and she is very pretty

>>18022868

Who is your favourite woodworked, and why is it Mathias Wandel?

>>18023744

There's no rule. Why did she stop texting? What was your last text? How long since you saw each other? How long till you see each other again? How much do you usually text? How much do you usually talk? Etc. Etc.

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>>18023744

>>18023751
We were talking about drunk people that got stuck in the elevator and I asked what she was up to. Just started texting her recently, last saw her friday, we go to a group tutor together for organic chem

What is the girl ideology of a man? Or what you think when i say "man"?

>>18023752
Thank you text fish

>>18023766

Then wait man. Don't make her regret giving you her number. She is not dating you and you seem to barely be friends. You are also gonna see her soon in person. So wait.

>>18023744

Never text a girl fuckwit.

The most you can do is reply to her texts but only 2-3 texts per day and after some time.

>>18023768


I guess a "man" has the qualities of:
-hardworking
-straight forward
-shows less emotions openly
-when negative emotions are shown, its more "physically" not like crying or over thinking
-level headed
-clean and organized with their belongings
I don't even think these things have to be true or men have to be this way. Just what I've analyzed from the men around me (dad, grandpa, uncles, brother, etc.)

>>18023779
I'll do that thanks
>>18023785

male here, rather old (30) and inexperienced in this game. asking anyone:
am I supposed to be insistent with girls?
I'm a shy guy, and I don't talk much. I asked some girl (who is much younger than me...) out after talking a bit with her, she said she didn't want to because she had a lot of work, was tired and stuff. I'm not sure if she said "no" as a no, or if she said that because she's really tired, or as part of a game... anyway, I thought, ok, she said "no", so it's "no", period.
now, sometimes I see her, and gives me the feeling that she wants me to talk to her or something. should I ask her again or something? am I just being dumb, deluded,..?

>>18023768
Generally, just a male person. Although it can depend on the context, eg "of course he didn't get that, he's a MAN" can refer to men not being as in touch with female cues and needing more than hints.

If you mean whether someone is or isn't a man in the respectful/insulting sense of those words, for me it pretty much boils down to being an adult. Knowing what your responsibilities are and taking them, not trying to shift the blame on others and make yourself out to be the victim all the time. Being true to what you personally believe in; moral courage. Being able to deal with your personal worries and issues (doesn't necessarily mean that you cope in the ideal way, but managing to get by).

>>18023798

You shouldn't "need" to be insistent. If she doesn't make an effort to meet you halfway, then she probably isn't interested. Move on and try again.

>>18023798

she said no.

Women that are interested in you will go out of their way to hang out with you.

Dont waste time or energy on girls that are "meh" towards you m8.

Like in martial arts you always overestimate capablities of your opponent. With girls you underestimate their intrest level.

If she is too tired to see you she is not interested. If she want to talk to you she will. She has your number if she is interested in seeing you she will contact you.

BTW its interesting how you started your post. It gives impression that you are really insecure. Listen buddy it doesnt matter how experienced you are or how tall you are. Only thing that matter to women is if you are insecure about it. Dont be. Women dont care about all this noise.

>>18023798
There's no point in assuming she's playing a game. In very rare cases these things do happen, but honestly a girl who pulls that shit (let alone even before the first date) isn't worth your time anyway. That doesn't mean that all people are 100% upfront and straightforward, of course, but there's a notable difference between beating around the bush and fishing for confirmation because you don't dare to flat out ask "do you still love me?", or having a strategy where you pull strings with a set goal in mind.

However, from what you said it sounds like she just wasn't interested in going out the moment you asked her. Unless she specified that she typically has a lot of work and is tired etc, that doesn't necessarily means that she tried to discourage you in general. Which means that regardless of whether it'll be successful or not, you can absolutely give it another shot. This is just a middle road kind of situation where she wasn't outright enthusiastic ("I'm no fun tonight but some other time seems great") but not completely dismissive ("I'm always busy") either. If you get good vibes, just try it again.

Thoughts on removing girls from social media who no longer talk to you? Like I've got a few girls on snapchat who always view my stories but never respond to my texts anymore when I ask them to hang out.

>>18023826

Dont do it. Just ignore them.

>>18023815
ok, thanks m8, I guess I really need to keep this in mind, because I'm always in doubt about this stuff

>>18023819
yeah, I'm very insecure. guess I should not care too much about things or people
>She has your number if she is interested in seeing you she will contact you.
well, she doesn't... should I had given it to her? I'm a dumbass

>>18023821
well, she does have a lot of work, and that's implied (I didn't mention this, sorry), but when I asked her out, I also asked if she had some free days or something, and she didn't reply, she just said she was tired and didn't have much time.

anyway, thanks anons

>>18022068
How do I approach a girl without seeming desperate? There's a girl in one of my classes who I've been eyeing but I'm worried it'll be awkward asking her out since I've barely even spoken to her before.

>no one here likes licking sweets off of their partners body
;_;

That's why I go to prostitutes, because you're all boring.

>>18024167
Just gotta break that ice. You're not gonna seem desperate unless the very first thing you say to her is
"Please for the love of god date me nobody else will".
Say hi, talk about mutual subjects (IE class,) get to know her. I would not recommend asking her on a date the first time you really talk to her, you don't even know if you'd want to date her yet.

So... I sent this to a girl "Great, can't wait to finish Monday. Well the place I was thinking of is called Sake House which was recommended to me by a fried and it shouldn't be too busy that day and I could make reservations plus we could stop by the Museum because Tuesdays past 4pm is free, but whatever works best for you is fine with me."

Then she sent thist "Wow... you really thoughts this through... I'll get back to you " (Emojis used, Thinking and Upside down smiley, incase they don't show up)


Some context, she brought up going for tea on Valentines day. I looked, and it turned out that the place closes early that day. So, she suggested earlier the following day. But I suggested this other place instead, and she sent that response.

The thing that throws me off is the upside down smiley..,..

Any ideas?

>>18024221
no, anon. you have to go to prostitutes because you are creepy and have a superiority complex about your mundane fetishes.

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>>18024254
Shit son, OP got BTFO.
All of it is true tho.

>>18024249
If she wanted to go out with you on Valentine's Day she's interested but you almost definitely came on too strong with having the whole thing planned out. Spontaneity is a good thing. You could have just suggested the other place and then once you were there you could have suggested continuing the outing by going to the museum or whatever.

Upside down smiley is usually playful though. Wouldn't let it ruin your day.

I saw a girl i hadn't seen for years, and I went over to say hi. We chatted for half and hour or so, but when we were talking she would often would look away when our eyes met, and break eye contact.

I guess i was making her nervous, but is this bad or good?

>>18024311
Eh, I guess. Probably not a lost cause at least.

She actually pushed for Valentines day for the original thing. I mentioned doing it next week originally, but she wanted to do it for Valentines Day.

And the reason I mentioned that emoji is that it is still relatively new, so it still has a lot of variation in use, unlike a standard smiley or anything

>>18024317
When you say tea do you mean dinner or do you mean actually going to a tea house?

>>18024330
Literal Tea House.

She wanted to go around 5PM on Valentines day.

>>18024312
Depends, she could have been uninterested in the conversation and looking around for an excuse out, but this could also just be what she does in general.
I for one have a hard time keeping eye contact with people I'm not particularly close to. I find it intimidating and awkward, so I often look around even if I'm not necessarily threatened or uninterested in the conversation. I just don't feel comfortable maintaining prolonged eye contact yet.

While I wouldn't say you were making her nervous, unless you literally backed her into a corner where she physically could not escape and were talking about your love of killing small animals or something, but I'd say most of the time when people won't keep eye contact with you while talking they are looking for a reason to leave.
Why that is could be anything, she doesnt like you, or maybe she had somewhere to be but felt rude interrupting you or just ditching you. Who knows. It's not inherently good or bad.

Just don't fall for the meme of "One girl didn't want to talk to me for whatever reason and therefore I must have been creepy."

>>18024336
The conversation was very back and fourth, I was even going to excuse myself at one point, but then she went on talking for a while.

If you were talking to someone you thought was really attractive would you have a hard time keeping eye contact?

>>18024332
You're fine, just wait for her to get back to you and don't bring up the museum thing again. I take it you two are otherwise pretty close? At least close enough to be getting tea on the biggest romance day of the female calendar year.

>tea house closing early on valentine's day
It's like they hate money. Why not stay open later and serve tea and cakes for couples to have as dessert?

>>18024312
If conversation was flowing you're fine, probably just a shy person. I'm not shy and I still do this if the conversation is half an hour long. I feel like it's kind of weird to make consistent eye contact or that long so I tend to look elsewhere without making it seem as though you don't have my attention.

>>18024374
>You're fine, just wait for her to get back to you and don't bring up the museum thing again.

I don't plan on it. I just figured I'll mention it as we are both the nerdy types. So...

But yea, I would say that she is definitely interested, judging by how she acts and all.

But the age difference is kinda odd.

>>18024364
Then it seems to have been mutual, she probably just isn't much for eye contact.

Me personally, not really. If I'm interested in someone, I'm typically trying to express that in some form and therefore I maintain eye contact kind of well. Especially if he's reciprocating.
However it's not impossible for her to be that shy. Tricky thing about hints and body language, it's always different from person to person.

Ok so female here.
I had a boyfriend (best relationship ever etc etc) last summer. He quickly got over me and I still haven't. I tried online dating but guys just ghost me after fucking or they just refuse to care for me at all (again, I guess they're just after the sex).
aren't there guys who are after serious relationships? I don't want sex out of a relationship, and after sex I always expect a relationship. I can't do one without the other.

>>18024400
They exist. Just don't fuck on the first or second date if you want to find one.

>>18024400
In this day and age, not really.
Your best hope is to pray an fwb turns into a relationship. That's just how it works anymore.

Same boat though. If you don't fuck them on the first date, they lose interest and never talk to you again. If you do, they lose interest and never talk to you again.
There's really no winning, just a game of chance. In the 6 years since I've gotten dumped, I've tried everything. Finally got 2 dudes to want to see me at least more than once, neither want to date me though. Close as I've gotten.

>>18024409
sometimes we haven't even met in person yet when they decide to ignore me and shit like that. right now I decided to stop searching for a date and I will just assume I'm better off single

>>18024400
>aren't there guys who are after serious relationships?
Sure, I've never been interested in casual sex. However as mean as it may sound, if I found out a girl was routinely pumped and dumped I'd probably give her a wide berth.

>>18024414
>Same boat though. If you don't fuck them on the first date, they lose interest and never talk to you again.
Pro tip, that's one of the oldest ways to suss out guys who are just after sex.

>>18024417
Online dating collects the worst types of people. They're on there for a reason, they like the ability to just disappear, not really a good trait in a potential mate. I'd suggest searching in the real world.

When is Valentine's Day?

>>18024400
I'm a pretty traditional male looking for a serious relationship, so they do exist. Online dating is only used for sex. Meet guys in real life, not in bars though.

>>18024425
Well that's my point then. Nearly all of them just want sex. Out of the hundreds of dudes I've met in 6 years, only 2 have expressed interest in seeing me twice. It's either I mess around and they bail, or I don't and they bail anyway.
>Inb4 that's because you're a bitch or something
That may be true, I'm not very attractive, my personality is submissive and reserved which not many guys seem to like. I'm not perfect, but idk how to be if perfection is the only acceptable thing. I've met so many people over the years from many different places, backgrounds, I've used every form of dating and meeting people you can list. No guy I've ever met in his early 20's is interested in anything serious.
This is just the era we're in. Sex is expected and instantaneous, and if you don't play the game, there's a billion other women who will.

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>>18024400
Lvl 22 wizard here. I want a relationship. my PPP will probably make anything sexual awkward with anyone appart from someone who genuinely likes me not the sex. Which would also be great

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>>18024444
Check em.

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>>18024444
>>18024456
Check'd

>>18024221
Hey I love doing that

>>18024441
>Nearly all of them just want sex.
And? Those who don't will stick around if you don't put out on the first date. Those who do will flake. If you don't like getting pump and dumped, it's a very simple solution.

>This is just the era we're in. Sex is expected and instantaneous, and if you don't play the game, there's a billion other women who will.
Sure, and those guys who are just after sex will flock to them. Those who want something substantial, less so. Dating has become more difficult, but that doesn't mean you need to engage in casual sex if you don't want to. I've basically stopped bothering with dating for similar reasons. Doesn't mean I'm going to go for slags for a moment of attention.

>>18024444
You're a mage not a wizard, you advance your job to wizard at level 30 mage you dumbo. Read up on the job system.

QUADS

>>18024489
I was like that up until around year 5. After that, when I'd given up all hope on life, accepted that I'll never be one of those people that has a loving relationship, never have a future where I'm not alone, I caved and decided that being used for sex was better than spending every moment of my life alone. Because honestly, I got to a point where the loneliness was driving me so mad I was ready to kill myself. The fleeting moment of false attention can at least sustain me for now and keep me alive.
You don't need to engage in casual sex if you don't want to, but you also kind of do. Unless you're willing to wait decades to maybe or maybe not ever meet someone who will stand with you for a longer period of time.

>>18024466
Are you male or female?

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>>18024507
>Because honestly, I got to a point where the loneliness was driving me so mad I was ready to kill myself.
Yeah, nah. You need a therapist. Discounting 2 women I saw for a couple of months max, I've been single since I was 19, currently 24. I've never considered suicide over it.

Shit like this is honestly painting a good picture of why you ARE single, why no one is "feeling the spark". Men who want a real relationship arent going to chase the woman who sleeps with random men because she's insecure about herself. Men arent going to want to go for the woman who's beyond desperate and would rather commit suicide than become a cat lady. Hell this is pretty much the same advice I'd give to a guy in your position.

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hey ladies if you got asked out would you refrain from using certain words like "i would" so they get the message that your not interested/to make sure you don't ask again?

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>>18024489
My bad bro I believe it was wizard apprentice originally?
Also,
Are you a wizard?

>>18024527
An apprentice in the strictest sense. First gf had hangups with sex because she was molested as a kid and never tried to force that issue. Didn't feel comfortable going all the way with anyone else, but I've done everything short of that.

>>18024514
Female

>>18024507
Relationships should be for sharing happiness, not finding it. Happiness is attractive.

Girls


How do guys talk to American women? From what I've seen, most are very shallow, its really difficult for me to hold a conversation with them. I don't even mean in a flirtatious sense, but just as 2 people trying to hold an intelligent conversation. An American girl asked me out on a date 3 days ago, it was boring as fuck, even tho SHE asked me out, I had to really try to keep conversations going, but she was too focused on her phone the whole Fucking time...

Why is this?

>>18024604
You got asked out by a boring person who is rude? That's not an "American" thing that's a "Rude and boring person" thing
And anyone with half a brain knows that spending an entire date on your phone is rude as hell. Maybe she just wanted dinner.

>>18024521
I've done the therapy. I've done the drugs. None of it made me happy. What did make me happy was being loved. I was only ever happy when I was making someone I loved happy.
I know it becomes a never ending cycle you cannot break. Can't get a boyfriend because I'm desperate, I'm desperate because I can't get a boyfriend, etc, etc.There is a point of no return I have clearly hit, my options are slim. I take what I can get and try and make do.
>>18024603
I can't share happiness if I have nobody to share it with. It's all I've ever dreamed of, I'm happy making other people happy. If I've got nobody to make happy, I can't be happy.

>>18024604

>Maybe she just wanted dinner

Going with this.

>>18024414
Nah, you're just acting like a hoe. Guy, 31, and I've gone years without so much as a date. I shave, dress well, have money, etc. So, approach girls, they're either taken, too young for me to date, or just not interested, even worse some were gay. I live in Miami, competing on apps like okc is pointless. Even in person it's a chore.

I'm so sick of this shit. Only to run into women like you online telling me how easy for them to open their legs. To top it off, I almost exclusively look for a relationship.

JUST rip my fucking head off.

>>18024414

If the guy loses interest in you by not fucking on the first date it's because he wasn't interested in you, clearly. You're dating the wrong people if you want a relationship.

>>18024612

That was just an example. But it just seems most American girls are.. boring. I don't even know what to talk with them about.

>>18024635

Then that's your problem, not theirs. You're in the same boat as tons of men in this country who don't know how to talk with the local women. Keep in mind it's extremely competitive here, and women who are high demand can easily put no effort into a date leaving you to do everything. If you get one like that, ESPECIALLY if she's on the phone all the time, get the fuck up and walk out. Don't give her the time of day and leave her sitting there like an idiot.

>>18024624
you sound kinda unattractive personality wise.

>>18024637

Well, why is it that European women are 10x easier to talk to?

>>18024641
And you sound like you've made a shortsighted assumption based on a single post.

>>18024626
There is no "right kind of people" then. I've seen so many people. Is that really just a string of bad luck? That 6 years of active looking as yielded NOTHING?

>>18024604
American male here. The average American is pretty stupid, and generally have no idea what's going outside of our borders. We also lack manners, especially compared to the rest of the world.
As for phones, it seems like everybody is glued to them at my college.
Seems like you just ran into a boring, average American girl. There are still tons of great ones, though. The best ones tend to be really headstrong and independent.

>>18024646
no, just the fact that you call someone a ho even though you're dateless and in no position to judge. seems like you're just bitter because you cant get what you want.

>>18024648
> Is that really just a string of bad luck?
It would be quite reasonable to figure your search criteria is fucked from the ground up. In fact I'm more inclined to believe in that going off of the information you've provided.

-you can't be happy outside of a relationship
-you screw randoms for attention
-you hate getting pump and dumped yet you keep doing the same shit that leads to it
-you admit you're desperate, so you probably go for the first guy who gets his foot in the door

>>18024677
She's straight up admitting she screws guys for attention. Regardless of what you think about him, that's pretty much the definition of hoe behavior.

Should i Shave my happy trail?
its pretty dark and thick and i dont have much hair anywhere else save for the usual chest patch over the sternum

>>18024764
>happy trail
What?

>>18024764
Are you a girl?

>>18024715
But I was searching before I even hit rock bottom in terms of crippling loneliness. After I was dumped the first time, there were still a good 2 years where I was optimistic, held my standards and waited patiently for the right one to come along.
Time has a way of wearing you down though. The more time passed, the more I realized I was wanting some sort of Disneyesq fairy tale. I was never going to be loved the way I wanted, certainly not at the age I'm at. It was a pipe dream to want something like that from the start. People just don't do it anymore, its an outdated practice.
It took at least 4 years to get where I'm at now, and even still I'm holding onto the last thread of that little girl's fantasy world. I still have yet to ever go all the way with anyone because I'm still hoping for my first to have been somewhat meaningful. I stop at oral with every casual dude I've met, but that's probably why they get bored of me so quickly. I'm about to just give up on all of that. I just genuinely do not see anything changing.
I'm not even trying to be hostile towards these guys, there's nothing really wrong with having and wanting casual sex so long as everyone's aware that's all it is. It's just that it's the new thing that everyone does. Nobody really dates the old fashioned way anymore, the world evolves. And at some point I'm just going to have to realize I either need to evolve with it or give up on that idea all together, and live my life miserably.

Are feminist women more likely to be open to dating non-white men?

>>18025010
Probably but you'd be nothing more than a token of how progressive they are.
You really don't wanna date sjws man, they're batshit crazy and won't let you fuck them ever because then you're just asserting your male privilege and all PIV sex is rape.

>>18025013
Pretty much this. For the most part they'll lesbian and really hate men anyway.

how to fuck a samoan girl as a skinny white boy

>>18025209
Be fine with getting an STD.

One for either gender

How does one go about picking up a girl at a store? Like someone that works there? I just don't know how to get from showing me products to a real conversation

>>18025397
If they were interested in you they'd probably mention something non-work related.