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I ended a friendship today with a person I considered my best

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I ended a friendship today with a person I considered my best friend. I thought that it was getting far too toxic for both of us. Not because we disagreed with each other a lot, but because the circumstances surrounding our lives made us stress each other out a ton. So I told that person how I felt and asked them to block me, or else I'd do it myself. And it was done, even if the other person was reluctanct of the idea until the very end.

I'm feeling quite apathetic right now, but there's a bit of sorrow. Sorrow which will most likely expand in the upcoming days. How can I be prepared and not let this hit me hard and leave me depressed?
>>
bump, it's already starting to get to me and I'm beginning to regret it
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>>18020069
>So I told that person how I felt and asked them to block me, or else I'd do it myself.
>>I'm feeling quite apathetic right now, but there's a bit of sorrow.
You sound really dramatic, this is behavior that should have been left in high school.
You don't want to talk to someone? Then block them yourself.
>>
>>18020069
hmm, I recently decided to cut ties with someone due to my evaluation of what were incompatibilities that led to the other person feeling emotionally abused (unjustifiably from my perspective) . Those emotional responses felt like unjust bursts of victimisation and that frustrated me beyond reason. I felt like the relationship was not bringing either party much satisfaction so ending it seemed like a fair solution.

I've regretted my decision since and tackled this situation from different angles. I realised that I did play a role in this person's reactions, but the blame was to be shared as there was not much good will present on either side. Nonetheless, I had the power to handle things differently, or set my terms in a much more mature way.

So in my case, I realised that my reasons for ending this friendship were right. The relationship did not benefit either of us. However, I decided to take responsibility for my conduct. It hurts,knowing you can fall prey to your own douchiness. Losing a friend hurts even more. It's the price I have to pay.

I know your situation is probably different from mine, but what I'm trying to say here is understanding what happened helps. Being an adult generally helps.
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>>18020069
Let yourself grieve, anon. Sure, it's for the best. But you need to go through the stages in order to cope with this.
Your regret is bargaining. Thinking, maybe it wasn't that bad. Maybe you could make it work. Maybe if you just did this, or did that.
Let yourself work through these ideas, and just remember that it's for the best.
You're going to hit the depression stage. It's okay, anon. Let yourself cry over this loss. If you bottle it up, you'll just be in the denial stage and feel worse. "I don't care." "It's not that big of a deal". Change is always a shock on the system, whether it's a good change or a bad one. It's okay to care.
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>>18020069

> Best friends
> Get stressed when bad stuff happens in each other's life

You are the worst kind of human being. When the going gets tough you shut down and push away your best friend because he/she is also in a tough spot.

Now you have no-one to back you up in your difficult situation, and the same thing goes for your best friend.

Friends stick up for one another.

They don't bail when things go sour.
>>
>>18020255
Sometimes things happen. Sometimes you're in an emotionally compromised spot and you have to be honest when an interaction is not doing anyone any favors.

My best friend in high school and I were going through awful times at the same time. His parents were getting a divorce and his dad was abusive. I had a house fire and fell into depression. He internalized his dad's values about productivity and threw his values into being "good enough". I fell into feeling like nothing matter and everything is temporary, so I didn't do anything. We conflicted, because he couldn't understand why I was slacking off, and I couldn't understand why he was so high strung.
We fought a lot because of those extreme value differences.

After a while I saw that we were making it harder for each of us to deal with our individual problems, so I stepped away.

As time went on, I thought of him all the time. I felt a lot of guilt for abandoning him. Six years later, he reached out to me and we reconnected. After meeting a couple times, we opened up about our split. He felt awful about how he had treated me. I felt awful about how I had treated him. But both of us had grown so much in that time. He gave himself a break, and I took on more responsibilities. We learned how to emphasize with other people.

We're closer now than we ever were in high school. I don't regret our time apart. We needed that. Sometimes you have to admit when things are not working out.

It's not about not liking what's going on in the other's life- it's about not liking how you are treated.
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>>18020255
It was precisely because I felt I was scum of the Earth that I thought both of us would be better off without the other one.
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>>18020317
Sounds like women being overdramatic.
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