What are some good words to comfort and console someone with the classic what-could-have-been?
Pretty extreme situation - my 40 old friend, who's been a vaguely unhappy, but fiercely loyal, wife for 17, met her former boyfriend for the first time since she married. They found out they broke over misunderstandings and communication failures - a very film like story. That's beyond the point though: regardless of what happens next, what could I say to reconcile her with the obviously saddening fact that she might have wasted almost 2 decades of her life? I need advice on advice, so to speak.
I'm way younger than her, but for a bunch of reasons, we ended up best friends and I'm the only person she confided this clusterfuck to. She feels many different things but the one I want to address is saddeness over what could have been. I'll take good inspirational quotes/citations.
>>17979527
After every storm there is a rainbow, anon! :-)
Well, if you think she WASTED 2 decades of her life, you are not coming from a point to give her good advice.
I tell you, most people just need to be heard to feel better, and that's the first go-to strategy on situations like that.
The second go-to strategy is to make her focus on something else. The future, the present. And I'm not saying relationship-wise, all but that actually. Ask her about something else, work, ideas for new movements, parties, whatever she likes. Make her disconect from the sadness and that might give her the oportunity to look at it from another point of view (a happier point of view, hence from a happier moment of her days).
The third go-to strategy, if all else failed, is to let her know the improvements she made since it all ended, or while with the guy, in a second momento. That's why I said if you think she WASTED her years, you are not in the right mind-set for empathy and advice giving. You can think that, its ok. Its ok even to say that, but you gotta remember you do not own the truth, and wasting time is something pretty much impossible. We are ALWAYS learning stuff, ALWAYS getting more experience and improving, no matter we wish to or not.
>>17979527
also read nietzsche faggot
>>17979527
Huh? I don't understand this post. Failure to communicate is a GOOD reason to break up. And what are the odds that these two would have lasted anyway?
She's looking at this through rose colored glasses. This guy didn't have chances to further screw things up, so she's not seeing that.
>>17979527
You should fuck her, sounds like she needs some vitamin D to get her pep back.