GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.
FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever.
>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.
>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.
>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.
>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships and fart guy
Fuck off
Is acne a big problem for a guy, even if he is otherwise fairly attractive.
>>17977290
No I wouldn't say so, unless it's very severe
How common is it for a girl to have a specific "type", meaning, the specific look of a guy that would make you instantly very attracted to him, without talking to him at all.
I thought this only happens to really young girls but I'm in gradschool and this semester I go to some class of an other department and there's this thirsty chick who kept sitting near me and look at me, I think I distract her from the lecture.
Girls: I think a girl that works at a bakery likes me. She makes small talk with me, asks about my plans, gets tongue tied and smiles a lot. I thought it was just being friendly but today there was a rose on the table behind her and she told me a guy had given it to her. I said "Oh cool, from your boyfriend then?" and she replied "Oh no, no, just a customer that likes the food. I'm pretty sure he's gay" and we talked about what we were both doing later in the day (both busy).
Am I reading too much into all this or might she actually like me?
Is it wrong to date a coworker? I like this girl who works with me and I feel stupid to let an opportunity go away.
girls why do you hate it when a guy wears his hood everywhere
>>17977338
It looks lazy and sloppy
>>17977336
It's not morally wrong or anything, but just be aware of what could happen if you're rejected or something goes wrong
>>17977326
I don't know. I would like to say she is into you, then again, I'm the type of person who reads it too much.
>>17977347
Same. Except I read so much into things that I come full circle and disregard what I've read as being stupid and probably not true. But with this, I don't know, it seems like it's actually possible.
I'm in kind of a weird situation with a friend of mine.
I've been friends with this girl for a couple years, ever since we met our freshman year of college. We're in the same major and have taken classes together every semester since.
She's had a boyfriend this whole time, so I couldn't ask her out or anything, and because of that I just continued with the friendship.
Well, over the past year we've become closer, and we spend a huge amount of time together both in and out of classes. This semester, for example, I'm taking three classes with her, we're doing a club together (each requiring a minimum of 60 hours/semester of volunteering), and we meet every Friday and Sunday at our university library or a coffee shop for 3-8 hours to study, have lunch, and talk.
When we talk it's lots of banter, sarcasm, and laughing, along with discussion about things happening in our field of study. It's pretty varied and ranges from very casual to pretty personal.
Now what's strange is that she's had a boyfriend this entire time who I've only met in the past week, and even that was completely by accident. He goes to our university, and apparently, until two semester ago, he was in our major. He also doesn't seem to have any idea that me and his girlfriend are spending as much time together as we are. I always assumed he must just be fine with it considering it's never been brought up as an issue, but now it looks like she hasn't even told him.
Truth be told, I think I'm in love with this girl, and I'd really like to be with her. I might just be grasping at nothing, but isn't it weird that she spends this much time alone with me? That her boyfriend doesn't know? Any input would be very much appreciated and any additional advice on how to become more than friends with her would also be good.
So I started hanging out with this girl, who has a boyfriend, just to kill time and get my mind off this girl we used to hang out with.
It's fun. I wouldnt date her, as I dont find her as my type and gorgeous to my standards. However, I am a little worried.
Last time we hung out, she got touchy. Brushed it off as normal. She then texted me at around 8 AM asking me what I was doing, this is what activated my almonds. I replied telling her nothing, but she never responded. I haven't hung out with her since, but what would you guys amount this to? Her relationship is LDR, and she has cheated before. I wouldnt mind fucking, but what is everyone's input on this?
>>17977379
Almonds?
>>17977375
Remember anon, girls can be friends with guys, but not the same way. I find it weird she hasn't introduced you to her boyfriend. Try to subtlely bring it up, very subtlely, but if he was clueless, something is up. Try and make a move if you find it appropriate.
>>17977341
>It looks lazy and sloppy
fuck off and eat shit cunt. its better than need 1q2973412897 lbs of make up to look NOT ugly. stupid nigger
>>17977383
Activated my almonds=made me think, made my gears chug
Its a meme. But stay on topic. Is she playing games?
>>17977383
>>/fit/
>>17977396
Oy you fucking cunt pls answer my question of meme 21st century women.
>>17977397
>calls someone a cunt, then asks for a favor
Yuuup.
>>17977384
>Try to subtlely bring it up, very subtlely
Any suggestions on how to do that?
>but if he was clueless, something is up
He was pretty clueless. He didn't recognize my name when I went to shake his hand last week, and he asked if me and his girlfriend are taking any classes together after I had introduced myself. He also didn't know I was in the same major as her.
Am I right in thinking that's strange? I mean they've been dating since before I met her and we've been friends for the past three years or so.
I just don't want to make this into something it's not a screw up our friendship, but it seems off.
>>17977402
[spoiler]pls[/spoiler]
>>17977402
>>>/aus/
How can I tell if my girlfriend is gonna cum/is cummimg during sex and not faking it?
>>17977403
Whenever she brings up her boyfriend, just ask something about meeting him or something. I dont know, but whenever she mentions him, ask about him.
You are right about thinking it is weird about never ever meeting him or her mentioning him to you. Very sus.
Also pls answer dis >>17977379
Other cunts havent
>>17977411
You can't. We're all pretty good at faking.
>>17977411
man who cares
Ladies, what would you think of a guy who uses the word "retarded"? What contexts would you think it's fine, and what contexts would you be put off by it?
>>17977379
>>17977415
Sounds to me like it would be pretty easy to fuck her if you keep moving forward like you have been. Seems pretty straight forward to me.
It's kind of an asshole thing to do though, but if you don't mind that and you don't plan on getting into a relationship with this woman who's clearly not loyal then go ahead.
Just be increasingly more touchy whenever you're hanging out and text her when she texts you. Don't come off as sex starved though and take it incrementally. It should just lead itself.
>>17977411
As shown by the two people who have responded to you, it doesn't matter. Most of them fake it anyway. You're legitimately better off not even trying or caring. Just get yourself off.
>>17977431
Thanks brudduh. I might hang out with her tomorrow. We haven't said shit to one another since she never replied. We are always smoking and laughing, shes gotten really comfortable with me. I know its weird, but she says shes going to fart, then walks away and shit. She also likes playing with my beat up truck. She's a weird one. Dont know about any of the other stuff, but yeah.
>>17977326
if she's single, ask her out
>>17977425
>mfw
>>17977295
I don't know how common it is, but I know that I have a specific type that I am attracted to physically. However this has nothing to do with mental attraction or personality which end up being more important in actually pursuing a person. If I see a guy and I think he's really cute right off the bat I might talk to him and realize that he is a complete and utter idiot and instantly lose my attractions to him.
I'll boil this down pretty quickly
>friend gets me talking to this other girl I had a crush on for awhile
>she ends it because trust issues or something? I don't know but she never said she stopped liking me or anything
>the crush suddenly starts avoiding me and overall not really talking to me too often even in a group setting
>have a fling with the friend after that
>cut it, everything kind of goes back to normal
>occasionally send snapchats to the original crush but don't usually get replies
>suddenly the crush Snapchats me everyday, all day
>like, I wake up to a Snapchat from her, we Snapchat all day even if "conversation" isn't being made until the next day it repeats
>this is actually a very sudden change in behavior, she's also tries to interact with me much more again
I don't know if she's just finally trying to be friendly with me or she still has a thing for me or what, but I don't want to make it weird again by asking about it. I was just going to let it happen and whatever happened happened.
Guys/girls, do I bring it up or let it flow?
Girls: is it true that you like it when a guy sends you a message saying you they think you're cute/pretty? It isn't weird? What if it's a guy you know but not well?
>>17977475
>Girls: is it true that you like it when a guy sends you a message saying you they think you're cute/pretty?
Only if I'm 14.
>>17977386
Triggered
>>17977473
This happened to me one time, but in early high school. We ended up hooking up but her "playing hard to get" was a turn off for me so I forgot about her. Invite her on a date, go to the zoo or something
>>17977473
Bring it up man. I was in the similar situation. Although we argued before we ended it. Then she started snapchatting me everything she did when she was in Idaho. Then she suddenly stopped. We talked in December, then I stopped it, brought up some stuff, bashed on her, then we don't talk anymore.
Ask, it's really fishy. Maybe she's attention whoring.
>>17977426
Pretty much any context is fine unless it's around an actual retarded person or people with a retarded family memeber, very outloud in public, or around my family or small children. The latter two categories fit for pretty much any "improper" language.
In any other situation it's completely fine and I use it myself. I think retarded is on the more harmless end of "bad" words.
>>17977487
And I forgot to add overuse of any word, but especially slang or edgy words, is of course not good.
>>17977475
Only if it's my boyfriend
What does it mean if you're a guy and you know this girl and you the guy are friends with this girl and you do stuff like friends and you hang out just a guy and a girl as friends and you watch movies with this girl and like cuddle but as friends but instead she tears your skin off but in a friendly way while you watch the movie and cuddle together as a guy and a girl that are friends?
Should I be concerned that this girl that I as a guy know and am friends with is cuddling with me as a guy and tearing my skin in a friendly way off while watching a movie?
Sorry if this sounds weird its late in the night morning in the place where I live that has the applicable time with which I am writing this so being late in the night morning I havent had any night sleep as of yet and as a result of not having night sleep yet am very tired and disoriented which is why I am apologizing in advance if this sounds a bit strange sorry thank you.
>>17977482
>>17977485
Yeah just hesitant because I don't want to make things weird in the group again but I think I'll wait it out a little longer before bringing it up. I remember she apparently told her friend/my friend the first time to not get involved and she did anyway, so the friend would definetely not say anything this time around and stay quiet, which means I'm on my own this time
How do you flirt without looking like a creep.
>>17977492
Cheesy one liners, overly potent musk-cologne, and the biggest shit-eating grin you can muster.
Sobby heartbreak story incoming. Just want some general opinion.
>March 2016 my GF broke up with me, a couple days before my birthday
>See each other a couple of times in the meantime
>She has a major back injury during her backpack trip
>Get in touch with her again
>Can't really take the contact well
>See each other again back home
>I take seeing her really, really bad
>Tell her I don't want any contact anymore
>That was since October
>See each other on a party last week
>I was so fucking tensed about seeing her, I actively ignored her and we didn't even say Hi to each other
>Think about her more and more this week
>She was at a mutual friends party yesterday but left before I came there out of work
>Spent a great deal of the evening reminiscing if I could have done things better and whether I do still miss her
>Send another whiny voice message to my best friend
WHY, fucking WHY, is it that almost a fucking year afterwards, I still get so fucking tense about her, seeing her, and even fucking hearing her name? I find it difficult to see us coming back together in this wrecked state, but I keep thinking about her almost every day.
I don't really know what to do, and I just want to be at peace and want it to stop. Frustrated as fuck so I'm gonna take my energy out running.
>>17977295
I definitely do have a type, there is a certain type of guys I'm just instinctively attracted to.
As the other anon said, it's more something physical, if he isn't good for me intellectually or emotionally I'm not going to date him just because he's hot.
>>17977494
You don't know the boundaries of your current relationship, you don't know how she currently feels about further interaction with you, and you haven't sorted out your residual feeling about the incident which causes you anxiety and stirs up your emotions whenever you are reminded of her.
I prescribe 3.2 hugs a day taken at 4 hour intervals, and a healthy serving of happy thoughts.
>>17977499
Haha, thanks anon. I could use the hugs every now and then, but the happy thoughts greatly overrule the non-happy thoughts. Sometimes they just pop in.
How would you suggest I confront this residual feeling about the incident? I already practice zen meditation a couple of times a week. Full focus, then.
>>17977411
Easy enough.
Just don't give her a reason to have to fake it in the first place.
Communicate, try new things, gauge her reactions, and analyze trends over time. If she gravitates towards a specific position or activity, chances are that's the most stimulating for her.
Also, I'd say that if she begins doing all the work for you, she's really getting into it. It's a bit harder to fake drenched bedsheets.
Though, if I'm being honest, I'm not sure I believe the whole, "Faking it" thing. I don't doubt that some people might, but I highly doubt it's as wide spread and accepted as people try to make it out to be. Most likely, it's just people trying to spur insecurities, or feel like they hold some power over somebody else.
So, I wouldn't mind that. If she's coming to you for more, you're likely doing it right.
>>17977464
>>17977497
>talk to him realize that he is a complete and utter idiot and instantly lose my attractions
this happens? for real? even when a few moments ago you were all smitten?
I'm the one person in the class who brings only a piece of A4 blank paper with a pencil while the others all print the slides (like hundred pages, what a waste of papers!) and bring their laptops. I hope she doesn't see this as idiotic, this is just how I was trained in mathematics, pen and paper, I'd prefer to use my own exposition for the concepts the prof is talking about, plus I don't trust him much so I check every non-obvious mathematical assertion he made.
Speaking of type, there's another chick in the class whom I want to fuck but she already has a bf, black, muscular, buzzcut, huge, towers over me (like I'm ~ 190 cm, skinny, medium long hair). Whenever I look at her she's cuddling with her bf. Is there any chance for me? I mean suppose they break up would a girl be interested in a guy who looks nothing like her ex
>>17977515
Dont even bother if they are happy. Don't wait for her either. You'll usually find better.
>>17977515
>this happens? for real? even when a few moments ago you were all smitten?
Oh yes. I lost attraction to more than one really hot guy because they said something ridiculously stupid.
>Is there any chance for me?
Who knows. I personally always go for the same kind of guy - tall, pale, brown hair, not too big, cute face, beard. My longest relationship was with a guy who wasn't exactly my type, but I still thought he was cute.
>>17977490
>>17977503
I think the easiest mistake we can make is believing that we will never have to bare and show our emotions.
In the same way that we may be able to ignore having to pee, we cannot deny the inevitability of it occurring.
If you do not allow yourself to work through your emotions, they'll always just be sitting back there slowly building up until you snap one day. There is no simply getting over things, or forgetting them, we must just find ways to accept them, for they cannot be changed.
The best way to work through emotions is just to let them out. Not just sadness, but anger, frustration, happiness, fear, disgust, resentment... After you've let out as much as you can, and you can no longer think emotionally, question yourself about what you were thinking. Should I have felt like this? Was it really my fault, or was there something that they could've done? Does this reflect on me as an individual, or was it merely an incompatibility of our mindsets? Just... work through it. Once you've spent time answering those questions, they'll no longer be lingering in your mind every time you think of them. With out all these questions and insecurities, you'll have less anxiety whenever you have to deal with her. When you don't have to worry about the circumstances, or where the fault lies, you'll be able to hold the happy memories in your heart and learn as you move forward and perhaps find somebody that's an even better match for you some day.
Girls
I've been chatting with this chick I met for like a couple of months (we live in different towns) and I've invited her to come down to my place for a small party I'm throwing. She suggested that she stay the night at mine and seems real keen to get wasted. How likely is it that this is confirmation that she wants to fuck?
>>17977518
>Dont even bother if they are happy
ok this is embarrassing to admit but I got hard just imagine the sex they would have, she's so slender and elegant tiny blonde with blue eyes and he's like black Hulk. I think I might have fetishized them...that's probably why I don't feel like responding to the other girl who showed interest.
>>17977522
Is beard generally what girls like?
>>17977533
Thanks for the advice.
I do work through my emotions, and I let them occur as well. An example was last night, where I was just fed up with the whole stuff. Maybe I should just be more aware of it happening.
Again, thanks.
>>17977265
>How do I get hints?
Pretty attractive guy, but I'm always in my own head. This year I had a girl bring me onto her bed and start talking about how sexually frustrated she is, and an older woman crash with me and start talking about what kind of kinks we have in common under the covers. Both times I didn't reciprocate anything. It's not apprehension that's keeping me from doing anything–I legit don't think about it in the moment!
Is there something I should know to be more aware of what other people are getting at (sexually or otherwise)?
>>17977549
Beard was a trend a few years ago but it's over now. In general bears aren't attractive.
>>17977564
If you aren't aware even when they're flat out fucking saying shit like they're frustrated or sharing the same kinks with you, there's no fixing you.
>>17977566
Bears are cute as fuck, anon.
>>17977549
>Is beard generally what girls like?
To me, yes. I always liked it, and still love it.
Either beard or a slight stubble, whatever works. I just never liked a clean-shaven guy.
Girls: What are your thoughts on a guy that dresses in primary bright colors like blue, some pink, some orange and mostly white?
So how serious are girls when they are drunk? I met a girl that told me I was really nice. She couldn't believe that I don't have a gf and she cuddled and made out with me. I was also rated 9/10 by her. I got her number but she doesn't seem very eager to speak. Should I try my luck or was this all just drunk-her?
>>17977580
Those are generally very warm summer colours. Dress a bit more dark in winter and fall.
>>17977588
Well drinking can sort of turn a few "filters" off so things spill out. She's probably embarrassed and thinks you think she's easy now so she doesn't want to even try at all now.
>>17977592
Oh I do, I just save the pastel stuff for summer. But I just mean for a guy wearing bright colors generally.
>>17977549
I prefer no beard and I thank the Romans for making short hair and a shaved face in-style for men. Hadrian had to be a greekaboo and ruin it though.
>>17977580
I don't like pastel/bright colours on guys. White is fine, blue is fine, clothes like pic related are weird.
>>17977593
I guess that makes sense. But do you think that I should try? I actually think shes kinda easy, but still, I liked her.
>>17977594
As long as it fits with your other stuff, your good. It also depends highly on hair colour in my opinion.
>>17977604
No harm in trying. Otherwise you'll just kick yourself for not at least trying.
>>17977605
Well my hair is more or less like pic related but blonder.
I've been told I work with just about every color except green and red.
>>17977606
You're right. Thanks.
>>17977611
You being blond generally means you can pull off light colours pretty well. Blue and blond is always agreat combination. In my opinion red and blond is also a great combination, but that might be subjective. I agree though, that green is a bad choice.
Guys,
So basically I've been seeing this guy, but he wasn't ready to date me. Well, I became a whore while drunk a couple nights ago and slept with a married couple. I told him about this, and he said I haven't completely ruined my chances with him. So my question is, how do I go about making things alright with him again? Or should I just try to let it go and pretend like we're just friends from now on? I still really want to be with him, and I've decided to give up drinking.
>>17977628
If he's willing to let it go then it's fine. Date him.
>>17977628
I don't even get how people get in these kinds of situations. Do you drink to the point you black out? The idea of sleeping with a stranger just makes my skin crawl.Either way I'd just leave it in his court. He wasn't interested in dating to begin with and if he decides to do a 180 despite your behavior that's really up to him, not something you can force.
>>17977588
Drinking turns off inhibitions in general. But at the same time, it also makes people retarded. She probably does think you're nice, does wonder why you don't have a gf, but that does not necessarily mean she wants to date you. But it is a point in your favor either way, no harm in asking her out.
girl in class starts talking to me. I have reasons to assume she's interested in me. Right, so she has been texting me a lot recently, and I'm quite horny so I don't see how I shouldn't release my sexual frustration on her. Is "do you want to come to my place and fuck" too straightforward? or should I use other euphemisms? do I even need to take her on a date? sounds exhausting. Also I don't want my friends to think I'm dating someone. I prefer the single status.
>>17977639
What are your reasons for believing she's interested? Why do you care about what your friends think?
>>17977638
It wasn't a stranger. They both used to be my coworkers. I believe he wants to date me, just wasn't ready yet.
>>17977649
Still sounds absurd to me. Asking someone out on a coffee date, simple. Asking someone if they want to eat out their wife? Not so much.
Either way I stand by what I said. If he wasn't ready, then that's something he was going to approach when he was well and ready.
>>17977379
>>17977436
If it continues down this path, she'll most likely seek you out because she's LDR with her bf. You can score some goods and risk a fight with her nonexistent bf or you can ignore her advances like a gent. Up to you m8 but if you do opt to fuck her brains out, don't go in a relationship with her.
>>17977648
Girl I never met before started making small talk, asked my phone number, giggling at my unfunny jokes. Touched my arm a few times. I tried to think of the reasons she's not interested, couldn't come up with any.
About my friends, yeah I have a crush on a female friend but she's abroad for a few months. I'd prefer to have my options open.
>>17977295
I don't really have a set type, at most patterns in looks of men I find attractive right away, but I can still see someone and instantly take a liking to them. Doesn't even have to be my regular "type". People can pick up on more about you than just your looks by seeing you. How you move, your working habits, smile, how it feels to make eye contact etc. With some people I just instantly feel a pull and it's in the little things.
>>17977338
Because the only people I know who do this are teenagers and that's what I associate it with.
Plus it looks kind of... like you want to look extra cool by distancing yourself from other people a bit. Like wearing sunglasses inside.
Guys,
If a girl is texting you, and the convo really isn't very interesting, or doesn't seem to go anywhere, but in person you can talk for hours on end, do the dead end texts matter much?
So there's this girl I was frinds with in high school who contacted me a few months back and we've been writing each other since (119 days according to snapchat). She semi-regularly sends pics of herself in her underwear, smushing up cleavage in low-cut tanktops etc, and the conversation is flirty from time to time. Then I moved back into town and started pushing for us to get together for a drink, and she was excited and invited me over for dinner but kept postponing it last minute.
Eventually we met at a bar instead and had a great time. Then some three beers in she revealed that she had met a guy and moved in with him and things were great, just great. I figured sure, I probably just misunderstood our communication, and enjoyed the rest of the night as just drinking with a friend. But since then she's kept being flirty and sprinkling me with barely clad snapchats.
Now, I assume she's keeping me on the hook in case the current guy doesn't work out, and that's fine. I'm having fun. But am I doing anything wrong in playing this game with a woman who isn't single?
What could it mean when a girl says "Ahahah" to something that is not funny, or intended to be a joke?
This was over text and in response to a question "congratulations, so, how did you spend your first day as an EMT?"
And her full message was “Ahahah, driving back from Schectady, and now been on call for 2.5 hours with nothing yet (thank god)"
We continued texting relatively quickly for another hour an a half or so.
>>17977722
Lol no.
>>17977492
>let how responsive she is decide how far you take it/whether you continue, make sure it remains an interaction and you're not just talking at her
>don't shower her in compliments, don't "joke" about being undesirable/giving up on love, don't press her for saying yes to a date right away.. basically don't reek of desperation
>don't approach girls at work and don't approach them in a potentially unsafe situation (like outside at night)
>don't paw at her: if she's responding well, start incorporating touch by giving her a tap on the arm to stress something you just said, or nudge her to get her attention if she's distracted, don't ever just start trying to put an arm around her
>let the conversation unfold naturally, don't go into it with a set strategy you stick to, you can tell from the other side that this happens and it's very uncomfortable
>>17977722
Not at all, I am not a good texter either, but I'm horny nonetheless.
>>17977548
Extremely likely. No sane woman would say this stuff in advance (it happening in the spur of the moment is still a bit different) if she had zero interest. Also because you might be a cool guy, but you better believe there's men who would snap if someone dangled that in front of them and then wouldn't put out.
>>17977580
That's cool, unless he is being seriously misguided I appreciate a guy sticking to his own style. Men are too afraid to stand out.
>>17977729
Not sure if I read it correctly but wasn't the laughter meant to convey that the question is mildly funny to her because she didn't actually do anything yet?
I'm in a weird situation.
I've been seeing this girl for nearly 3 months now. We slept on the first date and been dating since. Initially I was crazy for her however, at some point my feeling for her started to die out, which coincided with my depression kicking in. I thought this would come to pass and I could get back to that fuzzy feeling but I can't. I really like her and I want to be happy, but I no longer feel physically attracted and pretty much everything is gone and I don't know why.
I've decided the best course of action would be to end it and not string her along anymore. However, she has exams right now and I feel it would be cruel to do so at such a time. But at the same time, I can no longer pretend things are ok. The last time we had sex, I felt incredibly guilty afterwards. Since then, I couldn't bring myself to be affectionate nor have any sex with her.
We've met up last night and afterwards she went out drinking with her friends. Since I leave nearby, I told her she could crash at my place which she did. However, when she came over I didn't feel at all like having any sex and wasn't physically affectionate at all. When we woke up, I couldn't bring myself to do any of that either.
She gradually got cold and quiet and decided to get back home early. We exchanged a few texts and I apologized for acting cold. She texted me back in a vague way saying that "maybe she had too high hopes".
So what do I do? I feel like she knows something is up and I feel like such an asshole. Should I wait till she finishes her exams? Or talk to her right now and end things? I really like her and I would like to remain friends, but I feel like she will come to hate me if I drag it out any longer.
>>17977745
I really cant see how the question is funny. It's just kinda a standard one. And it was sent at 8pm so, there's not much more time to do anything. So... I doubt it's either of those two possibilities
>>17977757
I read it more like this, paraphrased to show it more clearly;
>so how was your first day?
>heh, I actually didn't get to see any real action yet
So it's not the question itself but being reminded of how her first day has so far not really been an overwhelming first experience. The ahaha was still over the top but some people just text in a really exaggerated way.
>>17977770
Eh, she's been on duty with the department for a couple months as an extra set of hands and has gone on calls. So it's not her first day really. Just the first day with the actual certification.
>>17977792
Okay, then I don't think there was any reason, just filler or habit.
>>17977795
Eh. She has laughed like that in the past but only when I made an actual not so funny joke that teases her.
The only thing she uses as filler is lol and that's very sporadic
>>17977749
Tell her that you think she senses something's off and she's right. You're sorry and this is not anything she did wrong but the two of you need to have a serious conversation after her exams. If she says fuck that, tell me now, then do it. She's an adult and you're going to hurt her badly, it will infuriate her if you get all "nooo, you probably can't handle it and will fuck up your tests". That's not your place.
As you mentioned she already knows. Not to rub it in but I have been in this position (where you can tell something's wrong, guy denies it, and I was sleeping over) and that feeling of wanting to reach out and pull him in a hug and him dismissing you... makes you feel so fucking small and worthless. There's nothing in telling her the above that she doesn't already know. I assure you she is thinking about what she could've done differently right now. So just take the plunge and level with her. Even if you say something unpleasant, being honest about where the two of you are is in itself a sign of respect towards her.
>>17977805
Thank you. I think you are correct. I thought by waiting till her exams are over (two weeks from now) I would be doing her a favor. But I think my behavior lately must have been even more hurtful, than a being honest and ending it. She was making plans and getting so excited about things we would do after the exams I just felt so shitty about telling her it's not going to work.
Worst of it is that I have no idea what happened. This is my first relationship and prior to meeting her I never had sex (even though I'm in my late 20's). She was so kind to me throughout and I can't believe I'm the one to end it, when I pursued her in the first place. But nearly 3 months in and I'm still not in love and quite frankly I don't see that changing anytime soon. I feel so guilty about it.
If a girl calls you bro, are you chances with her basically over?
>>17977841
Yeah, absolutely. Sadness is a pain and distracting, but endless thinking of what went wrong and analyzing every tiny thing you did isn't exactly relaxing either. What's more, breaking it off (or making it clear that you're going to do that most likely) is straightforward. If you keep her in the dark there's constant new developments that put everything in a different light and she can obsess over.
Shit sucks, but you're a human being, not some machine. This is what people are like, emotions are fickle. That's the risk everyone takes when opening their heart for someone. If no issue arose so far, you could've fallen for someone else in a year. All you can do is tell her what you experience. It doesn't need to "make sense". It doesn't need to be fair towards her. This is your reality and given that you cannot do right by her as her boyfriend, so be it.
I understand feeling guilty and honestly, if she treated you so well I'd be alarmed if you didn't feel some guilt at having to break it off now, but it's not like you decided that she wasn't good enough for you or whatever. You also have to cope with what your emotions give you to deal with.
>>17977846
Impossible to tell... I used to call my lover bro sometimes, but there's no doubt girls who see it as a firmly platonic term.
>>17977568
Is it normal to start to tear up when seeing something incredibly cute like this? I also tear up when playing with my cat sometimes (he can put up these huge eyes, like the animated puss in boots).
>>17977943
You sound sexually excited and it's normal. playing with pussy or watching cute cat videos is how females get off.
>>17977749
Didn't you post a separate thread thread for this a couple days ago?
I don't think you're gonna get any better advice now. Basically it's your call when you're gonna tell her. You know her best and should tell her when you think it'll hurt her the least, but you'll hurt her none the less.
>>17977965
First of all it doesn't get me sexually excited at all. It's more of melancholic feeling.
Secondly, I'm a guy. :/
>>17977862
Thanks anon.
>>17977981
Yeah, that was me. I hate to spam these boards, but this is my only outlet as of late. I was set on breaking up after her exams, but now I feel like by waiting I'm just making it worse.
Not deserving its own thread, but this is for everyone:
My ex
>cheated, when confronted softly she denied. Then proof was shown, but "that's out of context! why are you going through my stuff you ruin the relationshit"
>lied just about anything
>gasslighted me to the point that she could manipulate me to believe that I didn't see those text she sent
>threw me out of our apartment cause it was in her name (multiple times, just because I still had insecurities about her lies after I found out she had cheated)
>told me she has no feelings for me on the first day of the year
>had talks with a known fuckboy about moving in together all while she "tried to fix the relationship" by breaking up with me 3 times from Christmas to newyears (I was away for the holidays, a fucking STRANGER told me about them talking two weeks after the breakup, he said he thought I knew)
>blamed me for absolutely everything, be it the relationship or how she's feeling that day
Now, I don't want to have anything to do with her as I know her manipulative skills are beyond human comprehension. She had me and all my friends guessing.
I gave out mutual friends ultimatums - her or me because I don't want her to fuck up my friendships when she pleases by manipulating them to believe stuff about me.
Most of them are on her side now cause I'm the one giving out ultimatums, but that's completely fine by me.
Anything I should have done differently? They all are saying I'm childish and vengeful but I feel like it's the right thing to do given the circumstances.
What does /adv/ think?
>>17977994
It's okay man. You're in a shitty situation and you seem to appreciate all the advice. This is what the board is for so no problem mate. All the bait threads are the real problem, not people with real problems asking advice twice.
i dont like socialising a lot
people are nicer to me when i am rude and ruder to me when i am nice
how can i make it the other way around
also a lot of people expect me to say funny stuff a lot in groups, when i prefer to listen and be silent
i think its because i dont socialise a lot that i dont say much in groups, do grills like the more talkative guys more or not
>>17978000
Thanks anon. Yeah, this feels really shitty. It might seem a bit crazy, but even though we've known each other for just 3 months, this is probably one of the hardest decisions I had to make. Up till now, my life never involved anyone else, so things were always clear cut.
>>17978003
Girls like guys who are themselves, not the amount of bullshit they can spew.
Atleast non-sluts
What's up, dating advice. Posted here about this before.
Asked this girl from my class out, I am interested in her. Took her on a great date, showed her a good time and then tried to kiss her at the end. She did not reciprocate. Afterwards I tried asking her out twice more, both times she said she had something to do. Two exams. Confirmed true, but she did not propose another time. Drop it?
It'd suck cus I would like to get to know her better, and I know I can give her the excitement she doesn't have right now.
Either way I am meeting up with other women soon as well.
>>17978065
Not everything has to be like in the movies. She probs likes you but you were too fast with the kiss. Hard to tell, don't even know your ages.
You seem young, so keep the last sentence you wrote in mind (and heart).
Guys,
If you managed to get a girl to kiss with you after a few hours of meeting her, what would you think of her?
>>17978087
A normal girl.
>>17978089
You won't think she's easy or anything? I did tell him I have had pretty much zero experience in this stuff.
I come from a conservative country so now that I'm in the UK I don't know how acceptable this was
Ladies....answer me this...why so retarded? Merci
>>17978096
>I come from a conservative country so now that I'm in the UK
Well that changes things.
lol are you Chinese?
>>17978104
No from Cyprus. Ok it's not that conservative but compared to the West it is
>>17978118
how thirsty were you?
females:
been talking to this girl online for a while. been her friend known her a long time. seen her go through bad boyfriends. always had a thing for her but never been able to express it properly. always comes out in a friendy kind of way.
my best friend got the idea in my head that i should try and tell her how i feel again. is this a terrible idea? i keep thinking about the fact that we dont even live close. there's probably infinity other guys she likes. who can take her on real dates and shit while im sitting here posting on 4chan.
shes admitted to liking me and sometimes our convos get really ridiculous.i know for a fact sometimes we are giddy thinking of eachother. i dont put her on a pedestal but i think shes really cool and have never asked anything or expected anything of her. but theres a part of me that always wanted to try to be with her.
should i actually go along with saying something to her? whenever my logic comes in i really start thinking its retarded and bring myself back from the edge. but lately its been driving me crazy and i really want to see what happens. being her friend for so long and discussing all her problems i had supressed any kind of romantic feelings to just give her sound advice and stuff. it took my buddy talking to me to realize how much i actually like her and dont want her to be with somebody else.
has this ever happened to any of you? what should i do?
>i fucked a girl in my dream last night
>it was amazing and i came buckets
How would real sex compare to this?
t. virgin who jerks off/looks at porn constantly
>>17977564
Can somebody give advice that isn't mean?
>>17978122
not that thirsty, actually, I don't know.
I just went out alone and somehow ended up dancing and talking with him, we went to sit outside and he wanted to kiss me, I hesitated at first but then let him.
I'm not sure what I got myself into
>>17978162
so just some random guy? lol
how important is it for you that your girl or guy swallows from time to time? have you ever been able to get someone used to the taste of your man juice and how? i really really want to get into it coz i think its hot and most guys ive ever talked to about it thought the same but i just cant get over the awful taste of it ;( i can sorta handle the taste of precum or maybe just a bit of semen, like, i can lick it off my fingers if a drop or two got on them but anything more than that makes me want to puke.
halp!
>>17978172
Yeah literally someone I met the first time that night.
That's why I'm worried he'll think of me as someone just to fuck around with
>>17978179
will you see him ever again
why would you go from ignoring someone completely to not?
>>17978126
how far away from each other do you live? is getting together at some point an option? coz starting a long distance thing knowing it has very little potential of becoming anything more is probably a bad idea. sounds like she might be into you and since you cant get this off your mind id def say go for it. maybe try some light flirting, see how that goes and then half jokingly suggest that the two of you should maybe give it a try since you obv get along so well. just dont be too serious about it and make it into a "we need to talk" type of thing, at least not if you value your friendship and wanna make it work even if she says she doesnt want to give it a chance.
good luck sweet anon <3
>>17978071
I am 22, she is 18. What do you mean with?
> You seem young, so keep the last sentence you wrote in mind (and heart).
>>17978178
I liked it too but all my exs cum tasted like shit. It was so salty and watery that it made me burp and gag and I couldn't handle it.
For some reason, my boyfriend's cum is amazing. It's thick, there is a lot of it, and it tastes like nothing. Like nothing at all.
However, if I don't feel like swallowing, what I have been doing lately, is giving bf a bj until he has reached the point of no return, and as he is about to cum, I shove his cock down my throat. So he cums really deep into my throat. He loves it. And none of the cum goes in my mouth.
>>17978221
lol
>>17978087
She's trying to scam me
>>17978190
When we walked back to the flats (uni students), he kissed me again and said he'll call me, so I guess so
>>17978230
There's no need to stress out about this. Are both of you undergrad? I'm in gradschool and yeah generally undergrad girls I met are easy but that's what I like about them.
>>17978234
Yes we are.
I don't want to be easy though.. It's bad behaviour. Sorry if I sound too moral but I'd rather be a girlfriend than just someone who is for sex
Is my method of building attraction the reason I always get friendzoned?
So here's the thing, I've been obese my whole life, I'm not anymore, and who woulda guessed it but I'm actually semi attractive under there. A 7, maybe a 6 now since im not done with my weight loss yet. Even though I've always had the personality and social skills, I've never gotten far, and admittedly didnt try as much as I should have to attract women growing up so I'm starting really late in my mid twenties. I've had experiences, but never a real relationship and never had sex.
Anyways, usually I'll meet a girl through some mutual friends at a bar or party, I'll talk to them, but its hard to do that the first time one on one. If I see them again in similar circumstance where we're both familiar with one another and more comfortable, I'm able to be a bit more charming. I'll start teasing a little bit, gauging how she reacts, try to make them laugh (I'm usually pretty good at this) and try to brush her arms or hands with my own, trying to make her feel a bit more comfortable with some light touch, but not lingering. From here I try to get a number and then we'll text for a bit, maybe hang out some more with mutual friends. At this point I try to get them alone and ask if they're interested in going out. This has always resulted in a friendzoning except for once. They genuinely enjoy the time they spend with me, but they always say they dont see me with romantic interest.
I used to think that it was because I still wasn't attractive enough, and I might still not be, but I'm definitely not repulsive to look at and I've seen plenty of guys with my level of fat (once again, still losing weight) dating. So am I going about things wrong? Am I waiting too long? Am I simply going after the wrong women? I dont interact with a ton of them, which might be part of the problem.
I've been thinking of doing online dating and just accepting everything just to build up experience but that seems draining
>>17978178
Get your bfs to start eating fruit more often. Its common knowledge that what you eat affects the taste of your cum. Oily greasy foods like burgers and fries along with bitter things like asparagus or broccoli will lead to terrible tasting cum. Lots of water and fruits will make for a sweeter taste.
>>17978248
I know different guys have different approach, but if he's anything like me and given the circumstance you met I doubt you'd be a gf anytime soon. Maybe, maybe he's different. Describe him. Like does he frequently go out to get girls, does he focus on his study? what major? if you don't know these things It's very hard to tell.
>>17978255
they are literally too stupid to see how great you are
no im not kidding
>>17978270
Did I come across as arrogant or narcissistic in my post? I really didn't mean to, I'm trying to give a genuine account of whats happening to me and trying to see where I'm going wrong and trying to improve. I really would love to make a connection with someone, not just a hook up. I know saying that to somebody makes me come across as desperate, but its what I want and I know there are people out there who want the same, I'm just having trouble finding them and anything I could do to higher my chances I will.
>>17978278
?
I am not kidding. Those women were too fucking retarded to not see how great a partner you would be. That's all. You're not doing anything wrong.
>>17978263
As I said I don't know much about him. He was quite flirty at times, other times we talked about each other, like families and stuff, and we joked, that was really pleasant. He told me he likes to go out, and he seems to like what he's studying.
He seems really friendly with everyone. But as I said I just met him so I really don't know what he's like.
>>17978279
You're being serious? I mean, how do you know I'm gonna be a great partner from what I said? The idea that women are "too stupid" to see how great I am is ridiculous.
And lets says this is the case, the fact that they dont want to go out with me has to stem from me being unattractive, because if they're "too stupid" to judge me on my character, then it has to be my looks which are the barrier.
>>17977999
She's toxic. Leave, don't look back, and don't you dare ever feeling bad about leaving her having to pay your share of the rent - as she pointed out, the lease is in her name. Also, she can probably get that fuckboy to pay up, if he's moving in.
>>17978281
you're both undergrads meeting in campus and you don't know his major? isn't that one of the first questions: like hey I'm A, are you a student? I'm studying X how about you etc.
So you know his name, and that's it? and he said he will call you? lol this sounds like a guy who gets new pussy every month and he might not even be a student kek
>>17978096
No problem in her wanting what i want, and not being bound by cultural restraints.
>>17978297
I know what he's studying, I just didn't want to specify here.
>>17978304
lol ok that's just odd.
Now you're gonna think about this guy everyday and wait for him to call?
About your original question if he initiated the kiss and you just accepted it that is not enough to conclude you are easy by my standard.
But if you're hoping to be his gf then I don't know, it's hard to tell.
>>17977999
just cut ties with everything related to her. don't look back.
>>17978311
Ok, thanks for the advice.
I guess if he doesn't call me, his loss. If he does ask me out on a date I'll accept but I'll let him know I'm not going to sleep with him if he tries.
good idea?
Girls,
Internet told me that I should only text to set up date. Is this seriously true? Don't you need to build some kind of rapport before asking someone out?
Some context: I got matched with this girl on coffee meets bagel and got her number. We texted few times but since she reply at a snail pace (twice a day), I just asked her out. She told me she was busy this week, so I told her let's set up something next week.
Girls
If a guy had sex once when he was 18, and then goes his entire 20s without ever having sex, is that a BAD thing?
>>17978147
Doesn't say anything. In your dream all your arousal is projected on whatever you're doing.
Having said that, real life sex can be anything from 1000% disappointing to mind blowing. What people mostly don't get (and what all the "sex is overrated!!" stuff comes from) is that sex isn't -inherently- amazing. Even sex with a beautiful woman is more watered down and all over the place than watching optimally stimulating porn while expertly jerking yourself off. A vagina doesn't grip you exactly the way that your hand does. There's going to be at least some level of shame, being grossed out, performance anxiety etc involved sometimes.
What's amazing is having amazing chemistry with someone, and/or being intimate with someone you deeply love. It's the psychological thrill of having someone you admire and think is amazing put in work to give you the most private kind of pleasure. And yes, if you're used to each other's bodies and preferences and have reasonable compatibility, sex can also purely physically be a lot more satisfying than jacking off.
But it's all in the details and not in the act itself. People who have a fumbly, drunken one night stand with a girl they're not particularly attracted to then go "hurrrr sex is bullshit" are like teens drinking $2 wine then puking their guts out and declaring that people are insane for making a fuss over wine. There's literally a landscape of different kinds of sex, from traumatizing and giving you existential dread to making you want to cry out of sheer gratitude that you're alive.
>>17978343
>I'll let him know I'm not going to sleep with him if he tries
uh
If you go on dates with him, sex is expected. I mean you kissed before, so naturally he would expect the next thing. But you have a point there, the girl who gave me blue balls was more interesting than the one who put out (even though initially the easy girl might be more attractive). But don't be too extreme about it. Just let him down gently, and give him something to hope for, and when the time is right, take the dick. But this is the extent of what I know about this, because I went and fucked the easier girl in a similar situation.
If he doesn't call you can just find another guy, no problem.
>>17978370
Not him.
But I've only been with a girl twice and they were both terrible experiences
>>17978346
In an ideal world you would, but it's pretty damn hard to text smooth enough to get a natural flowing conversation with a near stranger. Most people can't do that, and if you can't asking them out so you have a better situation and chance to present yourself beats bombarding her with polite questions over text.
I don't really think you could've done anything better in the situation you describe. She just sounds a bit on the fence/flaky about whether she's interested in general. It's good to reflect on your moves but don't make the mistake of assuming that any girl is a code you can crack. No, sometimes they're just less interested and there's no way around that.
If you have the chance to build rapport more naturally (eg because you are classmates) then absolutely, do that first.
>>17978364
Different women are going to have different opinions, but it mostly depends on the reason. If you focused on other things, don't have hobbies (like going clubbing) that naturally put you in the situation to potentially have sex a lot etc, that's a whole different story from desperately trying to fuck for ten years while being constantly shot down.
Honestly this isn't something I would lay out for a new partner right away. And something I can't see most normal, polite people asking about upfront either.
That's not because you should be ashamed, but because you will run into girls who have always had semi-regular sex and who won't be able to comprehend how one does not have sex for a decade other than being somehow off or antisocial or whatever. It's personal information, shield yourself off a bit more until you actually trust the gal.
>>17978382
Alrighty.
I know sex is expected but I do believe it is better not to put out so quick
>>17977729
Anyone else?
>>17977729
Really doesn't mean much. Some people insert that without thinking the other would spend the next few days trying to analyze it
>>17978432
Eh. For her it is kinda outta the ordinary to just randomly use it. The other few times she used it, it was in response to an actual terrible joke that would tease her.
>>17978400
But what if I ever do have sex again, i think I'd want the girl to know that before we do it..
>>17978440
If you want her to know that because you're afraid it's going to show anyway, just tell her it's been a while. That's completely normal and she'll interpret it according to what she thinks is a long time to not have sex.
If you want her to know for intimacy and trust etc, just look for a woman who also isn't rushing to fuck right away and establish trust before going there.
>>17978255
Any help with this that doesnt involve "women are too stupid to see im so great" -_-
>>17978255
>>17978445
There's nothing wrong with how you go about it. I don't know how many women you are thinking of, but at the end of the day it is in part a numbers' game. From what you describe you make your romantic interest apparent early enough. A girl would need to be very dense/naïve to not realize it if the touching starts.
Or let me put it this way at least - from what you laid out now, you're not doing anything wrong.
>>17978460
It's not a lot of women, less than 5 in the past year, but they've all ended similarly. I guess if my method isn't terrible and attractiveness isnt too big of an issue then it really is just finding more women to interact with.
How do I do that? My friends are mostly loners such as myself, even though we do go out to bars and parties, so they themselves dont have a lot of women they interact with. I think I need to expand my social circle but I really dont want more friends, I really just want a group of people that include more women, as thirsty as that sounds. Im not getting any younger and I think I have a lot to offer to somebody and Im way behind since i was gross and obese for so long, I feel like a normal person now, and the only thing that isnt is that i've never had a relationship, i want that to change.
>>17978476
5 in a row?
wow I mean you're doing nothing wrong so keep trying and hope for the best. It might be beyond your control/awareness though.
Guys, how many of you have been to prostitutes? What's your general experience with that, how is it better/worse than with a "normal" girl?
I'm a girl and the idea of sleeping with a complete stranger without any emotional attachment (for money or not) has no appeal at all to me but I'd like to hear arguments for it since it seems to be pretty common.
Is it just like, letting off steam, getting it out of your system kinda thing?
>>17978476
Your best shot is going straight for a place where you have above average odds of meeting someone with a similar interest. A course related to your hobby or something like a reading circle is a great idea. Any man is also more attractive when he is enthusiastic and involved in something he likes doing and does well.
If you don't have any hobby that fits this, go straight for something that forces you to have couple-y interaction. A cooking class where you're paired up for example, or dancing - most dancing classes are a clamfest and it's easier to build a psychological connection when you're used to touching each other, weirdly enough.
Also, you don't have to actively befriend a bunch of other people. Can't you organize a hang out where you invite friends from your set social clique to bring along a friend that is not usually there? Not to expand the group but to switch it up and have fresh blood, see who else they enjoy spending time with.
Online dating is of course an option as well, but not too crazy about that personally. And you can always approach women "in the wild", as long as you aren't invasive about it and back off right away when they give you discouraging signs.
>>17978444
Alright, I was just curious. I probably won't ever have sex again Tbh. I've had multiple opprotunities over the past few years due to Tinder. But I've never accepted. I don't feel comfortable having sex. I don't feel attractive enough. I'm a skinny guy (not skeleton), I have only a little muscle definition, I have been going to the gym. But the improvements I've made aren't enough. I don't feel desireable and I feel embrassed. Just the other day I had to go to the doctor for a physical. He had my take my shirt off and even for a physical I still felt extremely embarrassed having my body exposed. There is no way I could do that infront of a girl. So, I don't accept their invitations.
>>17978492
>since it seems to be pretty common
kek common where
You know that prostitution is illegal in a large part of the world right?
Also I'm in gradschool and one of my friends is an escort, a pretty high class one (like she's only with rich business men) so the idea of going to prostie is foreign to me, I mean it's impossible to find a prostitute as good looking as her, so I would just compare them and be grossed out.
>>17978504
I should clarify, I'm from Europe and prostitution is legal here. I'm a university student at a pretty upper-class place and a lot of male colleagues have slept with escorts, of the expensive sort. Obviously they look pretty great.
>>17978484
What do you mean? Like i've tried to to start something with 5 women and they've all turned me down one after the other? Then yes that is the case. I think maybe im going for women out of my league or something? Maybe im fuckign up at the touching part, maybe im coming off as creepy not flirty? Can someone remind me what flirty touching is?
I still cant help thinking that it really is because im not attractive enough. I had such a bad self image before and now that ive lost weight, I guess im letting the confidence go to my head, im still not attractive enough :(
>>17978492
I'm not a guy but I'm Dutch and know a bit about prostitution. Most men who visit prostitutes don't go there for sex per se. The ones who do typically have sexual interests (like puking on a woman or her stepping on his balls) that a given partner is not likely to be up for.
More often it is a way to have sex with zero pressure on them. They're a paying customer and don't have to worry about whether or not she climaxes, whether or not they get hard right away, whether or not they feel up for a second round etc. For many men the work is mostly on them in regular sex. They are expected to do whatever needed to make themselves come, and make sure that their lady is satisfied. They are on top most often as well and foreplay is typically more about the woman (not necessarily in terms of oral, but touching, undressing etc). It's freeing for them to be able to fuck like they are jerking off, with nothing but their pleasure and desires in mind.
Another reason is that it's a sexual thrill for some men to spend money on this. There's a power imbalance from you being a paying customer and her trying to do right by that. They get a kick out of being able to treat her like they could never treat a girlfriend (even if only in minor ways like being condescending) and her not being able to do much about it because she's not in charge. It doesn't have to be sadistic but it's about power.
>>17978513
That makes sense to me, thanks. A friend has told me he kinda gets a kick out of "renting people" and then dominating them but I figured that was more jokingly.
I never thought about sex being more work than fun for men, either. Thanks Anon.
>>17978501
You sound like you'd benefit from professional help. Not because you should be pumped about fucking random girls on tinder necessarily, but the way you talk about your body shows a hugely skewed perspective. My past lover had a body like yours, no muscle definition, very very slight case of gyno. I'm a chubby chaser even. But I was so attracted to him that he only had to put a hand on the small of my back and I was wet. Being sexy is about so much other than looking "hot". It's about smell, how that person touches you, the vibe between the two of you - whether he makes you feel desired and makes you feel that you arouse him - whether he's playful with you (or dominant or submissive or whatever you personally like), how good his actual sex skills are etc etc etc.
Besides, sex itself isn't all about sexiness either. Old people still fuck usually and it's not because their worn out wrinkly bodies are so enticing but for the intimacy and dat oxytocin.
>>17978500
Im out of school so courses arent really an option for me, but something like a reading circle sounds fun, I love reading and discussing literature (english was my major) and dont really do it in day to day life. I've never gone for a cooking class or dancing class, that sounds like a lot of fun actually, Im a decent dancer, can move to the rhythm and what not, but proper dancing or learning moves has always been something im interested in. Are there such things as hiking/exercise meet ups? I love to hike but its largely solitary as no one I know likes to, is there a way to find groups? I know they exist, ive heard about it but dont know how to actually find it.
>>17978524
You're welcome! And nah, I think the fact that they don't necessarily want to be there (or more accurately: that it's flat out irrelevant whether or not they want to be there) plays into the domination thing as well and the two enhance each other.
I don't necessarily think the work outweighs the fun for most men, but I think it can be nice (for some at least) to experience the complete opposite for once. Similarly, the main attraction of strip clubs is pretty much being courted by gorgeous women the way regular men never get to experience.
>>17978544
Yeah that makes sense to me, thank you. Strip clubs are a whole other thing, paying to just look at beautiful people in a sexual way but not being able to touch them seems like a waste of money. I mean with prostitutes you at least get, uh, bang for your buck.
>>17978534
I didn't mean like school courses, but you know, a sort of steam course that you pay for where you meet up to get more or less professional lessons in it? Like language courses. Maybe there's a better word for what I mean in English I'm not thinking of.
Yeah reading circles I can recommend 100%. It's not just a way to meet like-minded people, but if you're discussing novels within no time you are also talking about the themes in there including love, sex, life in general etc. That also makes it a lot easier to quickly move on from neutral small talk with someone, and you can "show off" some of your viewpoints, your taste, your insight and so on.
Just make sure you find one where the members aren't too old. If it's not clear right away I'd recommend going to some slam poetry event and asking everyone there what a good local reading circle is where you can discuss literature with other relatively young people.
Dancing is a very solid option as well, really reinforces the male/female dynamic which influences the atmosphere, girls go there to have fun and are often dressed up and feeling pretty.
Hiking clubs absolutely exist but I wouldn't know how to find the one closest to you, I'd just google a lot to see what's out there/
>>17978556
It's the easy attention from women who normally wouldn't as much as look at you. That and for most "normal" men it is simply a slightly spicy night out with a sexual element. They don't go there because they're horny but because they want to be entertained and because it's a different, kind of weird environment that brings out a different kind of energy. It's also such a token scene, men indulging in an event like that together, it has a certain romanticism because of that on some people I think..
Also many strip clubs secretly allow more than they officially do. It's good for business if word gets around informally that the girls are lenient about more action if you pay enough. Also depends on the place how strict they are with touching, here in Amsterdam there's clubs where you can't touch a stripper's anus/pussy, but you bet you can knead her breasts and she'll rub her ass on your face with just a thong on.
But basically it's just a night out with an edge, not something you do because you want to get laid or even touch someone.
>>17978573
Yeah I can see that. I think strip clubs/prostitutes are also sometimes kind of a "rite of passage" sort of thing for men, or a masculinity thing? For example I was doing an internship at a rather prestigious bank in Zurich last semester and the chief of PE (where I was working) took all interns to some high-class brothel at the end of our internship since that's traditional apparently.
>>17978598
Yeah absolutely. It's also a unique bonding experience to share this somewhat shameful or taboo memory... just like it's a more powerful bonding experience to tell someone a shameful story about yourself, or something you might be judged harshly for by someone with different morals than your own, than one that makes you look good.
But it plays into such an old narrative that I think that also makes it interesting even to a guy who is not actually really into any of the concrete details that go down. Kind of like how many people are curious about doing a drug they might not even think will suit them personally, when they feel it's so common that they can't "miss out". If they try it and hate it they didn't really benefit from it, but they do know where they stand in this, they have a personal relationship with the phenomenon so to speak. None of my male friends are the kind of guys starved for female attention or into going on a power trip throwing bills at strippers, but I'm pretty sure most would give the idea consideration if it was seriously proposed to them even if only because they've heard and read about it often and it's somewhat exciting to be part of the real deal even if only on those grounds.
Also unrelated but that sounds like some seriously high prestige job, kudos on landing it!! Bet it works great on your cv.
>>17978532
I'm too uncomfortable to talk to someone about this
>>17978639
youre making fucking excuses man, either seek help or dont. things dont improve unless you take fuckign action, stop dismissing every fucking suggestion
>>17978639
More uncomfortable than you are with facing the conviction that you're bound to be alone while it could be avoided?
>>17978598
>rite of passage
This is what my friend says when we were undergrads, him and some other guys. But of course I didn't join them, I was too busy with algebraic geometry and it kinda killed my sex drive for a few years. Now he's dating some 18 yo, working as a relatively successful engineer at Micron (he has a publication in, gasp, optimization of wireless network lol) while I moved to a different uni, dating an undergrad and generally care more about problems of mere mortals, pure math has become a hobby to me.
>>17978647
Yes
>>17977564
I have the same problem but its more like I get scared of making a move, being rejected and looking like a fool for "assuming I could make a move just cuz we're talking about sex/are alone in private."
I was in a hotel room with a girl (separate beds) and she started talking about her body, tits and ass. I considered making a move but since she's technically in a relationship I didn't.
>>17977846
I say things like "my dude" just joking around with my boyfriend before and after we became a couple. I also call him big bro affectionately before and after.
Is it a mistake to avoid going in a club where the girl I'm interested in knows everyone, people playing on the stage comprised?
>>17978364
No probably not.
>>17978622
Yeah, I think so too. Always thought it was a bit weird but obviously as a girl I'm a little bit out of the loop so to say.
Eh, fingers crossed about the job. It's seriously long hours and pretty tough work but I enjoy it and of course it's just what should be done.
How do I make a move on a friend's older sister? I only met her once a few months ago, but she was obviously interested in me. No I haven't been facebook stalking her.
Also, since this is an advice board, is there anything I can do about food poisoning, besides wait it out?
Guys-
What petnames do you like to be called? Which ones do you hate?
Girls-
What do you call your boyfriend?
>>17979304
>What do you call your boyfriend?
Dickhead, asshole, fuckwit
>>17979304
any pet name is fine, but i reserve the right to mock it by giving you a ridiculous pet name in return
So, I wanted to take this girl out to celebrate her EMT certification, but the conversation never presented a way for me to bring it up with her.
I still want to go and try to take her out to dinner some time soon, but I don't know how I can bring it up, and how soon after my last message.
Any ideas on timing and what I could possibly say?
>>17979325
What kind of petnames have you been called?
>>17979312
That's valid and funny. Thanks.
>>17979334
"How did your EMT certification go?"
"I got it!" or "I didn't get it."
"That's great! How about you let me treat you to dinner to celebrate?" or "Oh no! I'm sorry. How about you let me treat you to dinner to make up for it?"
>>17979342
I don't know if you realise this, but I'm pretty sure he already knows that she got it and missed the opportunity to say exactly what you suggested
>>17979348
>>17979342
Yep. My plan was basically to say something like that.
But it kinda got steered away from that
>>17979304
I call mine goober and other similar variations. It started as a joke because of how much he hated that word in particular, but now it stuck. Big bro also, in more intimate moments.
>>17979348
>>17979352
True. Alright, so here's this:
"Are you excited about being an EMT? I'm so happy for you that you got in! Let me take you out for dinner to celebrate."
Alternatively, you could celebrate her first day as an EMT if that's coming up.
>>17979363
She actually has been on Duty with the VFD as an Extra set of hands for two months. And her first day as a proper EMT was yesterday.
>>17977988
Can someone tell me of they have that too or if I have a problem or something? I mean it's normal to find things so cute they make you cry right? There are these meme faces of it.
>>17979335
one of my exs used to refer to me as "muffin"
her name became sugarbush
she was very meticulous about her grooming habits and was/probably still is disgusted by bush
>>17979370
>And her first day as a proper EMT was yesterday.
Perfect! Do this now.
>>17979376
I don't think its too smart to do like that. Especially since she been on duty for the past two months. It's just that she had her certification for yesterdays shift. Don't know if her role was changed to represent that.
Also, we were texting last night, and I sent the last message, and there was no reply. So, I don't know if its too smart to do it yet as it hasn't even been a day since my last message.
I go to a big football school and last semester I met this freshman qt (im a sophomore) who came up to me at a tailgate and asked her friends to introduce her to me and we just talked. Later that semester I saw her at that same tailgate and we talked again, this time she asked me if she could come to the game with me. She was kind of drunk so a bit annoying but she called me a hottie and was asking me to help her with chem. I added her on instagram and saw that I kinda look like her ex, so I guessed I was her type. Well I fucked up and never texted her and its a semester later. Should I 1) go to our college bar and hope to see her again and resurrect conversation 2) sack up and text her [no idea what I would even say] 3) let it die peacefully. She really is a qt, with like 500 likes on all her insta pictures. I am not bad with girls, just horrible at texting so not sure what the move is.
Girls who I met the night before and I have gotten a phone number from. What do you expect me to do next? Text you to make plans or just talk? What are the chances you were actually even interested?
women
what's the point of feminism anymore?
>>17979454
Would also like info on this, and add in the fact that I walked the girl and her roommate home and ended up making out with her for a bit
26 yo girl here, happy to answer any questions.
>>17979509
answer mine
>>17979455
>>17979509
Wanna answer this one maybe? >>17979334
>>17979509
Please respond
>>17979293
>>17979509
And while you're answering could you also do this one please?
>>17979454
>>17979293
Invite her for a coffee. Simply things will tell you the most.
>>17979509
What's a big fucking nope on a first date?
Also what's a minor nope that's still kinda bad?
I'm trying to form some sort of texting relationship with a guy so we can become friends and then maybe more. I've texted him once, had a conversation, and never heard from him again (text-wise).
Do I text him again and if so, about what? Would you feel comfortable texting a girl after she initiated contact with you the first time?
>>17979597
Wait hold the fuck up, I'm on the opposite end of this problem. What's his name?
>>17977294
This, pretty much. It depends also on the confidence and selfsteem of that person.
>>17979610
K not me, sorry
He might be unsure how to reply to your last text so just left it and then forgot. If you initiated the original conversation he might be expecting you to initiate another one. Maybe he's just really shy, even over text.
How long ago was the end of the conversation? How did you get his details initially?
>>17978492
Never slept with a prostitute, don't even like the idea of casual sex. But at the same time, I can see the appeal if you do.
Women often talk about how it means the guy is desperate and pathetic since he can't get laid normally, but here's the thing. Hooking up with a gal at the bar isnt that special. Both require time and money, and a prostitute requires more money. A random slut requires more time. It all really depends on how much your time is worth from my perspective.
>>17979624
The last text was just that I'd see him on Saturday (not today, last saturday), so it was about a week and a half ago. He seemed to be ending the conversation so I just basically said "see you later." I wish I had ended with "feel free to text anytime" or "let's talk about this again soon" or something.
There was lots left to talk about, I think, but it was kind of personal stuff especially on his end and I'm not comfortable prying if he was annoyed by my text in the first place. He's been kind of colder to me in person afterwards, so I'm not feeling good about it anymore.
Got his number from a group text for a meetup group we both belong to. We see each other twice a week in a group, but do not talk one on one. The text was the first time we had a conversation just the two of us and I think I screwed it up.
>>17979583
I'm more curious about how to get ahold of her in the first place, since I barely know her. What do you recommend?
>>17979624
Also, can you explain your situation? Why don't you text her back?
>>17979634
It may be better to talk to him in person if it's possible. Try and ask him if you've done something wrong or, if you'd rather not talk to him directly at this point (which is fair enough desu) ask one of his friends about it.
It's possible that he was just cold because of the 'see you later', rather than the conversation, because he wasn't planning on ending it or it was quite abrupt.
GIRLS
How much importance do you give to a guy's wearing? Speaking on just physical attraction
>>17979653
I feel like if I'm misreading the situation (which is possible, I often feel like people are mad at me or irritated with me when they are not) , I will come across as a loon. Rationally, I think 90% chance he just doesn't think about me at all.
I'm considering posting some screenshots, but I fear that might be some ethical violation?
>>17979677
Perhaps not screenshots, just paraphrase any parts that may be significant.
What makes you so sure he doesn't think about you?
Sorry for late/poor responses btw, I'm kinda tired
Girls of /adv/, I want you to turn me Chad.
females
i made a plan with a female friend and she didn't show up
what do
Hi guys/gals, femanon here. Posted a couple months ago about bad sex with the long distance bf whom many of you guys either said was selfish in bed or autistic. I think hes sexually autistic, I probably am too. TLDR bf doesnt turn me on, doesnt seem to even attempt to do so, theres no spark or passion in our sex life that I can feel, and its pretty straight up and cold, and we have to sneak around and rush most of the time.
Well, I tried talking to him. Bless him he really tried, he wants to know exactly what I want. We tried kissing longer before sex but it still felt cold and awkward and I got impatient. Problem is Im really struggling with telling him exactly what I want. He wants like a cheat code and I dont really have one to give to him.
I think now its mostly me, but I dont know what to do to fix me. He wants specifics but I dont have any specifics to give him. And even if I did, I dont think it would amount to much if its still straightforward and methodical, almost like its a chore. Idk what to do or say.
Is a 5.5 inch length, 5.5 inch girth above average and good?
>>17979765
It's a bit smaller than average, but penis size doesn't really matter.
>>17979675
Much higher importance than muscles. Aside from being overweight, bad dressing is my no.1 turn off.
>>17979739
Aren't Chads asshole manwhores though?
>>17979726
No worries about the slow responses, I have another thread going on about it right now anyway (I made it before asking here, but it was in its death throes until someone bumped it)
Here's the ending verbatim:
Him: "Anyway, that's a story for another time, I'm sure. Thank you for checking on me though! Will you be there this weekend?"
Me: "<Some stuff about job> I should be there on Saturday, probably in my Patriots jersey"
Him: "You better be! You'll make home in time for the game easily!"
Me: "Ha, I'll see you then"
>>17979776
Isn't that what you want?
>>17979754
pls respond
i don't want to overreact to this, but also don't want to come off as a beta orbiter
>>17977375
She may be crushing on you
>>17979788
That really does seem like he was expecting the conversation to continue and that was a pretty abrupt end.
Even if you misinterpret things such a drastic change in his attitude (I read your thread, sorry) is pretty unmistakable. The best thing to do might just be to talk to him frankly, ask if you've annoyed him in some way and see how it goes. Worst case scenario, he gets huffy and refuses to talk about it.
What is the point of dating women?
Why would I want to be cucked?
>>17979860
If you don't want to date women, date men instead
Girls
Was does kissing feel like with a guy you really like, compared to just some hot guy you just met
I've been in a relationship for about 2 or 3 months now and I've mostly been taking it slow because for one I'm pretty akward and don't really have any experience with relationships I mean we just started kissing about week ago and that was my first kiss too, and second most of her past relationships have just been her being used. I don't want to seem slow to her but I don't want to be fast either. I mean I'm happy where I am with her right now but I don't want to bore her either. In short how should I go about progressing with her without coming off as just wanting her for satisfaction?
>>17979870
You say you don't want to be slow, but kissing literally months into the relationship is objectively slow.
>>17979876
I know and I dwelled on it and have been told by several people that it seemed slow and I agreed, that's why I wanna change
>>17979859
Maybe. It seemed to be wrapping up to me though. I was very tired and it was late though, so maybe I assumed incorrectly. I am thinking of asking him to go get coffee.
For girls mostly, I guess
I'm about to go out on a date with this girl tomorrow. Problem is, it turns out I went out on a couple dates with her roommate a couple months ago, nothing too serious and we didn't have sex. I don't think she realizes who I am, but I figured out who she was from some context clues. I think her and her roommate are pretty close, so I'm surprised they haven't talked about me. Is this a big deal? How should I approach the situation? Just deal with it when it comes up?
>>17979888
Only bring it up if it needs to be brought up, otherwise it'll look weird.
>>17979637
Pls
>>17979889
Alright. I was just going to play it off like I didn't realize who she was. Mostly just afraid things could get weird if I go back to her place.
>>17979888
Not a big deal unless you fucked something up major with the roommate, like you stood her up or something.
>>17979906
Nah, things were going well with the roommate then she started struggling with some stuff and broke it off with me. I don't think I did anything too wrong. Appreciate the response.
>>17977722
depend on how much we can see each others irl, if i see her every 3 weeks and between this time she doesnt speak to me or barely, yeah it's a turnoff, well, not really a turnoff, but if i don't have a contact more often with the person i tend to not care at all.
>>17977999
sound like she's a huge bitch, leave her alone, don't speak to her ever again, move on and find someone worth your time and efforts.
>>17978087
i think that would mean there is something between us and she like me.
>>17978492
i've fucked 4-5 prostitutes in my life, to the street worker from the escort. Escort is fine, on the same level of a hookup with a girl from a nightclub, and every other prostitutes will be worse than that.
The best sex is always when feelings are involved, always always.
I did it only because i was super horny sometimes and lonely. I never had many gfs in my life, i wouldnt say that i'm ugly but apparently i'm not attractive either, this ruin my confidence and it show sometimes, never been "proud" of spending money on fucking but never been "too" ashamed either, it's an experience after all.
>>17979304
i'm french so "mon coeur" (literally mean "my heart"), bébé (baby) and that's it, anything else is fine too but i don't feel anything special about them.
>>17979927
I'd rather never experience sex again than have sex with a hooker
Is being bisexual a huge turn off for women? I conceal the fact that I am so I'm not sure if I should veer admit it if I got in a relationship with a women.
How / when do I iterate a policy that if a woman tries to use sex as a weapon I will get it from other sources? Obviously not when I do it because that would destroy whatever we had, and not on the first date because that would turn anyone off.
>>17979938
yeah, i lost my virginity at 18 with a street hooker, was completely awful, and i was "so this is sex ? wow, it's a lot overrated", but i had the chance to meet my now ex gf after, and sex was amazing.
>>17979945
It wouldn't bother me so long as you are capable of monogamy with a woman. I think it could be kind of fun talking about hot celebrities together.
Girls with SOs, when you go out dancing with your girlfriends, what really goes on?
Why do you dress up so sexy if you're not like trying to impress anyone or get attention or something?
>>17979964
We do it to get other guys to buy us drinks. And if they're hot enough, we go home with them. Also every club has a 'hottest thot' award every night, so dressing up is partly to do with that
Girl I like extends her arm for me to hold her hand. I also like to grab her by the waist and basic light touches. She also stares at me a lot and she finds any reason for me to talk to her.
I haven't asked her out because I don't think she wants to be serious. I say this because (even though people say not to take social media seriously) she follows guys, more importantly single guys on Instagram (they say so in their bio). This tells me that she just likes what we're doing any nothing more I guess?
>>17979957
I've never had sex with someone I care about..
>>17979969
So even if you have a husband you just go home with the other guy.
Sweet.
I'm considering telling a girl who ghosted me how her not responding has felt awful and pleading to her not to do this to other dudes (or anyone.)
Is there a non-autistic to go about this?
>>17979991
Yeah? Why else would we go dancing? What he doesn't know can't hurt him
>>17979993
No, it's inherently autistic
>>17980001
>Yeah? Why else would we go dancing? What he doesn't know can't hurt him
>>17979993
That sounds autistic as fuck.
Just ignore her and move on
>>17979334
IDeas?
>>17980015
Call her and ask to meet her
>>17980012
>Just ignore her and move on
So she feels okay doing this to others? So she gets all the relief and satisfaction from ghosting with none of the guilt?
That feels wrong, there has to be something I can do
>>17979993
It is inherently autistic as other posters have said and it's unlikely to make you feel any better.
I've also ghosted people a long long time ago, and I can tell you that even back then, I was not proud of it. I felt awful about it too and the only reason I did it was because I think I have some sort of anxiety disorder. I absolutely hate turning people down and I often go home and cry after being asked out. I know that is the biggest "cry me a river", first world problem and I don't expect anyone to feel sorry for me. I'm just saying there's a good chance she feels awful and guilty about it already and is well aware that her inability to turn you down says way more about her than it does about you.
>>17979809
>>17979754
could one of you niggers answer my question plox
>>17980024
I guess I am mostly over thinking this?
Really, I should just go a head and do it... Well, maybe not call give our awkwardness in verbally speaking, but same idea.
Something like "Hey, lets go get dinner before classes start again. I'm thinking Wednesday?"
>>17980033
Just ask her what's up, have you ever considered that she might've gotten caught up with something and forgot to tell you or better yet just didn't show up at all. Just confront her
>>17979945
For me it would be, but you shouldn't lie to your partner. Honesty will get you true compatibility, so you end up with someone like >>17979962 and not someone like me.
>>17980034
You said to celebrate an occasion right? Just say hey to celebrate you getting your certification wanna go out to (fancy restaurant or bar name here)?
>>17979801
No. Bitchy sluts do though.
>>17979975
well, i wish you wil have it one day, sex become amazing with time and the more you bound to your partner.
>>17980051
It doesn't have to be that reason, but I could say something like that.
Maybe like "Hey. I should have said this before, but I wanted to take you out for dinner to celebrate your EMT Certification."
>>17980045
thank you
i'll go away now
>>17979974
I guess just confront her?
>>17980057
It probably won't ever happen. I'm not keeping my hopes up at all, I have 0 expectations Tbh
>>17980061
That sounds like a good plan and what you said before works good too. Hope it works out anon
>>17980064
You're welcome
>>17979956
I think it would be easier to find a girl who just doesn't do that in the first place.
>>17980078
>That sounds like a good plan and what you said before works good too. Hope it works out anon
Hopefully it does, but I still am kinda nervous that I may loose her as a friend if it doesnt work out. (Because well. she has a pretty big impact on my life)
>>17979964
I've never gone out clubbing in my life and never will
>>17980031
She said she went to therapy for anxiety and I've dealt with it pretty badly myself so I could relate but what she has done left me completely in the dark. I feel so shit, like I did something so bad that I don't deserve a response or a rejection, it eats me up. I don't know what I did and I never will.
>>17980008
Don't bite the bait anon
>>17979993
Not really. She knows what she's doing, she just doesnt really care.
>>17979945
Many don't,but I'm pretty sure most are turned off.
My gf gloats about being known as a hoe in her group of friends. She claims she never slept around but was always open about her sex life and people just assumed she was a hoe so she goes a long with it/embraces it. I do know she used to go out a lot to clubs and would grind and make out with guys but she told me she never went home with anyone. I don't pry into her past because I don't want to get upset over anything I learn, but it does leave a lot to the imagination...
90% of her friends are guys which she claims she never did anything with because she wasn't attracted to them. I do know that one of these guys was an ex, and she never told me he was until I confronted her about it because she was still talking to him/hanging out with him and even bought him a really sentimental Christmas gift. This happened about 2 months into our relationship.
Now she's making all sorts of weird statuses on facebook about feeling emotionally conflicted but they're very vague. I asked her about it and she said she didn't want to talk about it. Then one of her friends commented on it and she told them she needed someone to talk to so she would message them later.
I feel like she is not a very trustworthy individual, should I just break things up?
>>17980082
That's understandable I'd be nervous too, if you're like me you'd probably stumble your words and talk really low and probably fidget a lot but I did this when I asked out my girlfriend and surprisingly she said yes. I have faith in you anon you got this!
>>17979455
Power, money, attention, cities/victim points, etc.
>>17980089
You made her your girlfriend and this is only an issue NOW?
>>17980096
*virtue
>>17980074
don't say never, Anon, just do what you like in your life and it'll eventually happen, and try to always be social, meeting new people etc.
Don't stay alone at your house.
>>17980095
Yea, hopefully. But she really gives mixed signals,
but she always seems eager to do something Says "Definitely" and "We could always give it a shot!" but shys away from commiting to a day... Granted I always leave it vague and never make it date like. So... Also, she is probably shy and maybe nervous aswell.
>>17980089
Yes, this situation sounds terrible. I really hope you haven't been dating her for very long.
My ex was raped last night. I tried to support her but there's so much baggage in our relationship that I'm simply unable to support her the way she needs and she's not talking to me right now. I don't know what to do. I feel so much grief for her.
>>17980119
Hey man mixed signals are better than none at all, if she seems willing then act on it as fast as you can and true she could be nervous too
>>17980115
The thing is, I really enjoy being alone at my house. I love just wrapping up in all my blankets and watching TV, infact I'm doing that right now.
>>17980085
You probably didn't do anything, anon. She either doesn't think you are compatible / isn't into you for reasons that do not necessarily reflect badly on you or she is just too shy and anxious to continue.
At best, you can try reaching out to her and let her know if she's feeling anxious or pressured, you're willing to take things at her own pace. Chances are this won't work for her and she may continue to ghost you, but I mention it because it would have worked for me.
>>17980127
I guess. This kinda sums her up.
>Fall for this girl
>She would randomly sit next to me in mostly empty rooms
>Talk to her, we are friendly enough
>Try asking her to lunch
>Say yes, but drags a guy friend along
>Awkward lunch. Guy friend hits on her, and she wants nothing to do with it. (Ends up breaking contact for an unknown reason with him)
>Nothing happens after
>I catch her staring at me, and occasionally she doesn't look away, instead we just stare into each other eyes for a few seconds.
>She still never texts me first, but she will keep the conversation going if I do text her. Sometimes for 6-10 hrs.
>I sometimes slip in jokes that kinda tease her. No one finds them funny, but she still laughs. She sometimes teases me similarly
>She Makes it a point to try an push me to become an EMT. Which she is one, but also knows that I want to do it soon.
>>17980141
Go for her man it seems to me from what you're saying that she really does like you
>>17980183
Yea, I'll message her tomorrow at like noon or something. But I am kinda self conscious seeing as I am kinda average. (sorta chubby and longish hair) while she's seen as being atleast an 8/10 by most.
I guess is is kinda disbelief in a way that's causing be to doubt this so much.
>>17980139
I appreciate this post anon, I think you helped me humanize her side of things which is something I should had been doing more of.
I'll at least try to let her know I didn't mean to put too much pressure on and try to slow down.
>>17980191
Don't worry about being average man, she finds you charming so really that should boost it. If it makes you feel any more confident I had cancer at a young age which gave me scoliosis and a bunch of other problems physically but I was still able to find someone
>>17980208
Thanks. I guess she just sees something In me that draws her to me.
Well. Let's see how this goes then...
>>17980218
I believe in you anon!
>>17980030
You can't force her to be a better person, And as another anon already mentioned she probably feels like shit already. You're not her mother, you're not her therapist, and she is not your responsibility. Just move on with your life. If she does keep doing this to other people she'll end up sad and alone, just let life and karma take care of her.
I'm actually fairly handsome and it seems like every girl who shows interest in me only wants to sleep with me or show me off. How do I meet women who want a stable loving relationship?
Do men actually want relationships and love and to respect and be respected their SO?
It seems like most of the men I meet just want sex, or they don't really like women much, or they see us as some kind of trophy.
>>17980265
Another anon has given me some perspective and I won't be doing what I wanted but I'll try to address how she may feel and just be done with it if she is.
You're right that I should just let her be and I guess it makes sense to let karma sort it out but I wanted to do this for me and for people who could end up feeling small because of another person's anxieties.
I thought I could reach out to her not with the purpose of being her mom but to prevent anyone else from getting hurt like this. I guess I'm misguided or something but I thought I could help people even if in a very tiny way.
>>17980363
I, personally, do genuinely want more than sex. Older friends seem to think less of me for it, so I could just be naive
how soon is too soon to ask a girl out met at clubbing?
>>17977265
Do women like bubble butts on guys? I know everyone has their own tastes, but I've never seen a woman say they dislike a nice pair of shaped muscular buttocks on a man.
>>17980363
Absolutely. A relationship to me is a like having a best friend that you're never sick of seeing. Sex is a factor of course but it's not the whole picture.
>>17979373
Don't worry anon, you're not alone. I've teared up at cute things since I was born. I'm pretty sure it's normal.
What's it like to have romantic feelings for someone?
t. Robot
>>17980644
Like this.
>>17980644
Sky rockets in flight
Afternoon delight
>>17979509
how does it feel being 3 years expired
>>17980227
Thanks. I'll send it within a few hours