>silence after you speak >people turning their heads away

you're on the right track for realizing the problem is you. keep going.

>>17948899
I have the same problem. But I'm pretty sure my issue is that I'm uninteresting, always anxious, and just not very smart. I think me being boring is the main thing, though. So maybe that's your issue?

>if you make the awkward guy feel like an outcast and a weirdo, maybe he'll turn normal

normie logic is terrific

>>17948899
Any examples in particular? I've known people that I've suspected were autistic and have said some pretty hilarious, but extremely inappropriate things. And I'm not even talking about political correctness

Maybe you need to be more clear and assertive?

>>17948899
Does what you say really contribute or is it just filler? Do you have a retarded opinion? Are you ugly or smell bad?

>>17949017
Really not my case. I make casual, boring questions that get ignored.

>>17949031
My attempts at contribution tend to get a worse feedback than my filler, unless I'm talking about something I'm knowledgeable about.

>Do you have a retarded opinion?
Sometimes

>Are you ugly or smell bad?
Ugly yes

>>17948899
I do this when I particularly despise someone that I gotta be with because of academic/social obligations, or that is extremely awkward.

A whole group of people doing it to you sounds weird tho. Aren't you sure it's just your paranoia? I have low self-steem and when I'm feeling very down I tend to overthink people's reactions like that. Or maybe your friends are just douches, not sure.

If someone interrupts me and I know its not because im talking too much, I just walk away.

Not going to waste my time or listen to rude ass people.

>>17948991
This.
>Be on management team with two other senior managers
>They pretend not to notice me unless I'm close to rude to them
>Confront them and they say they have no issues with me
>Ask boss about it and he says that it's all in my head and that I should talk more with them
>Afterward they up the ante by going silent and leaving when I walk into the office
>Quit job a few months later and go back just to catch up with some people
>One of the managers ignoring me comes out and starts talking to me like we're old friends
>Ask this bitch why the fuck is she talking to me now
>Tells me that they liked me but were trying toughen me up because they didn't like my polite & calm dispositions on "their" team
>tl;dr my coworkers treated me like shit in hopes I would become one of them

Another thing that normies piss me off with is that if you do try to level with them, they act as if you're evil incarnate for speaking about the problem at all. You can't just talk about issues and resolve them. You have to play their normie mind games until you prove yourself worthy to be in their company. Fuck this shit.

>>17949231
I thought about getting confrontational a few times. But idk, people don't know your history, so that reaction can come off as disproportional and make me look even more weird.

The only time I ever acknowledged it was during a group conversation where, for the third time, my contribution killed the conversation and I just sighed and gave up talking for the rest of the night. I didn't feel good afterwards, it felt like I had let them know that they got to me.

I think if I wasn't so driven towards improvement and fixing my problems I would just use this a criterion for people and avoid anyone who treats me like this, but spend my life dodging anyone who does it is not really realistic. Either I'm the problem or I'm surrounded by cunts (or both) and either way I have to work on it for my own good.

>>17949242
I'm to the point where I tell people how it going to be or I walk. I treat people how I want to be treated and I expect the same or they can't have any of my time. Obviously with a job it's different but in personal relationships you have full control over what you're willing to put up with.

So I spend a lot of time with aspies and this can be pretty frustrating for everyone involved.

Usually what happens is that the person contributes to the conversation...then just keeps going, usually either shifting the topic to something they had seized upon or taking a joke or analogy way too far.

People look away awkwardly because they're trying to signal their disinterest so they'll wrap it up. The conversation dies if derailed from the topic people were interested in discussing.

Do you have a few examples of things you've said that have killed conversations?

>>17949242
>Another thing that normies piss me off with is that if you do try to level with them, they act as if you're evil incarnate for speaking about the problem at all. You can't just talk about issues and resolve them. You have to play their normie mind games until you prove yourself worthy to be in their company. Fuck this shit.

So fucking true. If you try to solve tensions by acknowledging and addressing them you're seen as aggressive.

>>17949272
Yeah I had to do that a couple of years ago when I was a couple of days away from being put out on the street and my "friends" who were always calling me up for job hookups, money, late night venting or other favors were no where to be found. Now I tell them that if they want something, they're either going to do something for me first or pay me. Lost most of my friends but the ones I have now at least respect me enough to at least think about my needs.

But for work relationships, I expect people to have some amount of professional maturity. Even if you decide you don't like somebody, you still have to deal with them on some kind of level. But nobody ever does yet have the nerve to act like they do when you confront them about their bullshit.

>>17949294
I'm not the confrontational type and I can be a little autistic about some things so I tell coworkers to let me know if I do or say something they don't like so I won't do it again. I don't even get mad and I thank them for letting me know. Ironically some of the most outgoing types will not say a fucking thing but instead go behind my back and gossip or start acting differently. They will be mad at me for not talking to them about it yet just as angry when I do. It's all terribly frustrating.

>>17948935
Funny how people who always advise to the person that the problem might be them, or that they need to focus on themselves, are usually the same people who fail to do so.

File: professorkatz.png (282KB, 650x650px) Image search: [Google]

282KB, 650x650px

>>17948935
The amount of times I've seen that logic used against sexual assault survivors causes these arguments, and people like you, to irk me.

>>17948899

It sounds like you say things that are inappropriate either for the conversation, the situation or the people involved. People react by avoiding it to make it less awkward for you or for them and turn away to signal social disapproval. So probably nothing is wrong with you, per se, you just misread the situation somehow and your contributions miss their mark.

>tfw handsome and tall
>tfw autismo as fuck

I can spaghetti all I want and no once cares.

This reminds me of a guy who created a fake profile on a dating site:

>sends the most autistic, creepy shit to random girls (like: "I like to shit in my diapers, it feels so soft and warm" or "AYYYYOOO SHOW ME YOUR PUSSY")
>but also is a 10/10 muscular, tall guy with a pretty face
>gets a lot of enthusiastic replies

The guy posted the screencaps (on /int/ I think) and it was unsettling

>>17948991
That worked with me though.

I used to work witg kids who had autism, finding them jobs in the community. They either:
> Say something inappropriate that, if not outright ignored, will result in a discussion about why they can't say those things (which is worse)
> Talk far too much, to the point that they dominated the conversation and would have to be ignored or everything would ONLY be about them. Typically seen in kids who don't socialize enough outside of work and are pathetically desperate for human interaction.
> Or their contribution is stupid. This leaves no alternative other then addressing how and why it was stupid or ignoring it.
I hope you can see from all of my examples that when they ignore you they are doing you a favor. You're too close to this to see, but you are indeed the problem. Once you realize this you can try to analyze what you said, why you said it, and how it would likely be perceived, and prevent yourself from saying anything like it again.

>>17949581
>Sexual assault survivor
>survivor

People who call themselves survivors when they weren't in a life threatening situation irks me

>>17949659
>rape is not a life threatening situation
k.jpg

>>17949703
>oh no a penis slid in my vagina for a few minutes

i'm a rape victim, rape really isn't that dangerous

>>17949648
>>17949017
>>17949290

Is /adv/ retarded? Why is every relatively banal problem of social interaction treated like literal autism here?

>>17948899
>>people turning their heads away in the middle of your sentences

Ugh, this. Though whenever someone speaks to me I always make sure to give the proper attention or at least verbally respond afterward. People have pleb attention spans

>>17949710
except the physical, permanent damage. how easily your attacker could've killed you in the process afterwards. the social ostracisation that induce a suicide. the fact it's physical violence at all puts your life at risk. the potential stds and pregnancies (which can be fatal even if consensual). you're no rape victim, mate.

>>17949711
/adv/ has been showing bigotry towards autism and other mental illnesses for some time. it's the general prejudice here.

>>17949710
And that totally validates all violent rape cases ever, also tits or gtfo cum bucket.

>>17949781
>could've died
>might have hurt you
>possible permanent damage

good job trying to ridicule and minimize my trauma though

real fucking classy

>>17949788
i don't have tits, i'm a guy who was raped by a family member as a child

>>17949791
Who saw this coming top kek!

>>17949711
Anon, not understanding why people constantly look away while you're talking isn't a normal problem. Normally-functioning people intrinsically understand this piece of body language.

Those with autism have to be taught cognitively. It's not discrimination.

If OP thinks he's not on the spectrum he's fucking wrong.

>>17949988
You sound like someone on the spectrum trying to convince others that they are too desu

>>17949988
>1/2

>not understanding why people constantly look away while you're talking isn't a normal problem
Yes it is. As it's a very common problem in multicultural societies such as the US.

>Normally-functioning people intrinsically understand this piece of body language.
No, they cannot "intrinsically" piece together body language and social cues. People from different cultures cannot interpret body language and cues of those of a different culture. People who grew up in one family easily cannot pick up on the language and cues of a different family. Those who are brought in certain environments are left unable to read subtle clues and shifts in nonverbal communications of those from a different environment.

Body language is not a universal language (at least not to species in the homo sapient family). And depends entirely on experience, culture, environment, and upbringing. To say otherwise hits so many types of prejudices. Racism and ethnocentrism, for one, as it excludes races, ethnicities, and cultures whose social cues and body languages differ from yours. It's sexist, as genders have shown to exhibit different cues and nonverbal communications. It's ablist, a big one, as it excludes and puts at a disadvantage those who not only have difficulty in reading social cues and nonverbal language, but possibly incapable of doing such at both a psychiatric and neurological level -- as the ability to recognise nonverbal cues, versus explicit communications and direct contact, are separate, specific processes on the brain.

It also helps to point out that when "you need to learn body language" is brought, it often means the body language and social cues of white westerners; with little-to-no thought to the possibility that other cultures are going to have different ways and meanings behind nonverbal communication.

>>17950156
>2/2

>Those with autism have to be taught cognitively. It's not discrimination.
It is discrimination, as it's targeting, specifically, those with a disability and mental illness.

>If OP thinks he's not on the spectrum he's fucking wrong.
And that's a bigoted statement from someone who likely voted for Trump.

>>17949639
This, but my autism stemmed from my parents always being away and spending too much time alone as an only child. I would have killed it if my parents had stayed together and I hadn't been raised by day camps, babysitters, and television.

>>17949659

it kinda depends but it can cause A LOT of internal damage, not just to the sex organs either but that's horrible enough

women subjected to mass rapes in sudan for example usually developed cancerous cysts in their vaginas

>>17950166
>>17950156
who the fuck wastes their time shitposting/false-flagging on /adv/

go back to /pol/

>>17948991
worked with me, and with a lot of people
it litterally takes a month to go from weirdo to normie

>>17950254
It takes some people their entire lives to do that. If it only took as small an amount of time as a month, I doubt you had an issue in the first place.

>>17949605
This doesn't fucking work. Girls often like me at first but are put off by my status/behaviour. People on soc always told me I'm handsome, and I have lots of matches on tinder.

>>17949988
You are fucking stupid
>Being awkward and an outcast means you have autism
>You must be on the spectrum which I judged from 1 short post on the internet

>>17950287
Not grasping the meaning behind people looking away while you're talking is not anxiety or awkwardness.

Words have meanings.

>>17950269
I'm not on the spectrum and I was not that old when I decided to change, so maybe that makes it easier for me
but I doubt it takes people their whole lib-ves to dress better, have better hygiene, and learn not to speak for too long during a conversation

>>17950369
*lives

>>17949659
it's because "survivor" sounds better than "victim". plus, a lot of rape victims end up killing themselves. mostly though the term exists because a rape victim has to survive with the trauma of rape, which is a never-ending struggle

>>17950156
>No, they cannot "intrinsically" piece together body language and social cues. People from different cultures cannot interpret body language and cues of those of a different culture. People who grew up in one family easily cannot pick up on the language and cues of a different family. Those who are brought in certain environments are left unable to read subtle clues and shifts in nonverbal communications of those from a different environment.

There are 100000 little details and varieties about communication. And you try to take that into account. But communication between people is not rocket science, really. It's not hard to not come across like an utter retard.