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How to stop wanting a relationship/love? I'm tired of constant

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How to stop wanting a relationship/love?

I'm tired of constant rejections. I'm tired of my sex drive. I'm tired of wanting intimacy knowing it's probably not going to come. I got crushed with my last rejection (#9 in a row and she ended our friendship) and I'm just tired of it. Everyone tells me things will come along but they never do. " Just b urself" means nothing when being yourself is nothing attractive. I feel like i was created wrong or i was made to be teased with this my entire life.

My therapist tells me not to worry about it but they admitted they had no trouble finding multiple women in highschool/college so they can't really relate nor give advice.

I've tried improving myself. I picked up hobbies I'm absolutely shit at and hardly enjoy, i tried making friends to no success and I'm do my best to forget about my loneliness by working non stop. I just want to disconnect myself from my feelings and truck on.

I tried nofap. I tried hypnosis. I've tried therapy, and I've even tried illicit SSRIs to attempt to kill my sex drive. Yet despite all this i still want to connect with others romantically and i can't even masturbate without feeling disgusted with myself. I want to feel intimacy but i know it's most likely not going to happen.

How do i kill this part of me. I wish it were like in the movies where the protagonist eventually stops feeling altogether.
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>>17947009

sounds like your standards are too high. which is understandable we all want an attractive partner but unfortunately we can't all have one.

that being said, you cant stop wanting it. its not a conscious decision you can make. you can make the decision to stop pursuing but not to stop wanting.

there is no way to stop fatties from wanting bad food. but they can learn to control themselves on their own.

you can also try to replace the bad thing. if fatties like sweets we get them on fruit and yogurt. if you like romance we get you on friendship instead.
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>>17947009
Are you physically attractive?
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> i can't even masturbate without feeling disgusted with myself.

Why?

Try to be someone who enjoys life. Make an actual effort to enjoy things you do.

Try to do exciting things. Try to make exciting things happen.

You have to build your life, anon. It doesn't happen overnight. It takes a long time. You have to try a lot, and maybe fail sometimes.

This won't take away your need for love, but it will make you feel better, and make you more attractive.
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>>17947088
My only standards really is don't be fat. Fat is gross.

>>17947093
No. I have a malformation born of genetic disorder/developmental disorder. Also makes me sterile. I have a giant chest, mini tits, and a girly face.

I picked up gardening and fishing but i suck at both and don't have much fun. I've never had hobbies really before beyond hiking and pipe smoking. Only thing I'm really good at is working your normal menial job. I've never had many friends and moved across the country so i lostthe two i did have.
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>>17947384
Well, i did have a friend here but since i asked her out she hasn't talked to me since. I don't think she's interested in continuing the friendship which is ok.
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Any further comments/advice?

Kind of lost here
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I have simular issues of my own. My theory on how to get people to be interested in me (in any level) I do interesting things that come along randomly. For example, a playing card deck was introduced into class. When given a opportunity I show some card tricks. Things like this occurs often, but I still seem to be over looked. What I'm trying to say is some talent (if no talents, make some) can possibly be used to get people to notice you.
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