hi guys I'm a 28 year old straight white English male

File: me.jpg (402KB, 1500x1294px) Image search: [Google]

402KB, 1500x1294px

hi guys

I'm a 28 year old straight white English male

I live with my gf (couple of years older, not exactly sure) and have done for a while, but she's quite a polite person

The problem is that I love to chew and eat my food really loudly. Like, extremely loudly, as loud as I can. If you chew your food as loud as you can, imagine that times ten, because that's how loud I chew my food

So anyway we were round at her parents' house last week, who she has a really fragile relationship with, and we're having dinner, and all of a sudden I realise they're all looking at me

I'd forgotten to chew quietly. Had been munching and slopping with my mouth wide open, nostrils flared, saliva dripping, laughing, guttural, deep

So I looked her father and said

"Not the first time I've had my mouth full of white meat today, if you know what I mean"

(we were eating chicken and my girlfriend is albino)

Anyway I'm in the toilet now and I don't know what to do please help me, any kind of gesture or act that I could perform for their appreciation. I also have quite a firm case of autism and so I misjudge social cues a lot of the time so please help me