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So my ex broke up with me roughly a month ago. After 2 years

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So my ex broke up with me roughly a month ago. After 2 years I thought she was the one and was already planning my future around her. She dumped me on December 14th in person and didn't even give me a reason (the whole time kissing me and hugging me telling me she loved me) until almost 2 weeks later and it was via text. She refused to meet in person to talk about it and said we shouldn't talk and that there was no chance of us ever getting back together. Then I get this shit out of the blue today and it's got me so angry. I was just starting to be able to keep her out of my mind and attempt to move on but now she's pulled this bullshit and idk what to do from here
>>
>>17936830
Do nothing, duh
>>
What a ... fuck man I'm sorry. No Contact.
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>>17936830
shes toying with you
block her from all communication mediums
proceed to get your shit together, live well, and let her find out through the grapevine what she missed out on
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>>17936830

She probably has a new lover, but feels bad about that because "she isn't a bad person".

Try to move on, dog.
>>
>Hey, we can be together in a few years after I fuck boat loads of men and get my vagina destroyed
Block
>>
>>17936830
Ignore it. She clearly wants to be single now, for whatever reason. You weren't enough of a reason to change her mind. This might be her way of letting you down gently, or she might be justifying her actions to herself because of her own self-doubt. That's irrelevant to you, it all leads to the same outcome of you staying single.

Ignore the message, move on, block her if she continues to prevent you from doing so.
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>>17936830

Let her know you thought she was the one, and then block her on absolutely everything

Let what might have been haunt her
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>>17936941

Don't do this lolol that's so beta.

Just ignore it and stay in no contact. When I went no contact with my ex she dumped her rebound boyfriend and got depressed. Girls fucking love having their ex's as backup plans, don't give her that pleasure. She's dead to you, go full no contact. Maybe after you ignore her for a while she'll give up and send you a "hey can you come over?" text out of the blue. happened to me before.

No contact is a gift from the gods.
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>>17936974

you called that anon beta and then recommended basically the exact same thing he did, except you told OP to wait around hoping for a response

Don't hope for a response, OP. Just write her off as a lost and just block her. She's obviously just going to be dicking you around and obviously doesn't have the consideration to think about how much this might be hurting you.

From the way you described her behavior I would be suspicious that she was cheating or found another man. That text just makes me think she's keeping you around as a backup in case her fucking around with other dudes doesn't work out. You deserve to be more than someone's bronze medal. Block her, never talk to her again, and move on
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>>17936999
I was her first relationship, her first everything. She's been handling this fucking breakup like a high schooler and hasn't taken my feelings into consideration even once
>>
>>17936830
In case you need a translation:
she wants you to be a safety net to fall back on after spending the next couple of years getting pumped and dumped.
>>
I wouldn't respond if it were me, I would actually block her number. If she doesn't have enough respect and decency to give you a reason why, then why (and does it right before christmas, come on) should you have any respect for her or act decently?
>>
>>17936830
Just say "fuck you, bitch" and then don't respond again.
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>>17937048
Femanon here. What's she's doing is wrong, but she probably doesn't realize it. It sounds like she is confused and overwhelmed and probably having doubts, feeling guilty, and is scared moving forward and she keeps trying to fix the poor way she handled everything, but winds up just making things worse.

I would honestly just tell her to get out of your life and block her, not necessarily out of anger, but because that's what would be best for both you. She needs to learn that actions have consequences and that, to some people, she's occasionally going to be the villain and you need time to move on without her muddying the waters.
>>
>>17937082
Don't do this. Any profanity just makes you look immature and an ass. Just don't reply like the others have said.
>>
I would just delete the text and ignore her op.

I know it sucks and I'm sorry you have to deal with this
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>>17937102
>What's she's doing is wrong, but she probably doesn't realize it

So women are children?
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>>17937048

Girls can be cold man

I've seen it a lot of times: Girl breaks up with a guy, and because she doesn't know how to handle her feelings, and because talking to him hurts, she ends up behaving in a way that makes the guy wonder whether she really ever loved him at all

Yeah, it's shitty of her, but there's not much to say beyond that. Leaving the door open for her is just going to hurt you. The harsh truth is you probably will never get the kind of closure and resolution from her that you seem to be looking for.
>>
Don't respond and block her number.

It'll eat her up wondering if you got her text. She'll probably try to reach out to you a couple more times
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>>17937102
This is the best advise.

Your ex as this person pointed out, is young and dumb. Much like a puppy you dont beat it for shitting on the floor, it doesnt know any better right now. You are her learning experience. Sucks, but you are a rung on a ladder for her to develope into hopefully a better person.

Close this ultimately sad chapter on your life. Block her with no harsh or optimistic reply. Act like that "are you sure" button is the back cover of this book and close it, put it away forever.

Sounds cheezy but were dudes, we compartmentalize and a visualization helps.
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>>17937102
>What's she's doing is wrong, but she probably doesn't realize it. It sounds like she is confused and overwhelmed and probably having doubts, feeling guilty, and is scared moving forward and she keeps trying to fix the poor way she handled everything, but winds up just making things worse.

often females are like this. maybe guys are too but from my experience guys are not as irrational about things they are invested in, they are more just disrespectful straight away if they dont like someone.

why are women like this?
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>>17937141
>Girl breaks up with a guy, and because she doesn't know how to handle her feelings, and because talking to him hurts, she ends up behaving in a way that makes the guy wonder whether she really ever loved him at all

What they do is intentional. It's not that they are confused it's that they try to hurt you as much as they can on the way out
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>>17937147

I'm sure that's true sometimes, but not always.

It's not that they're confused, it's that they're afraid.

Breaking up with someone in a way that gives them closure and resolution inevitably involves confrontation. You have to confront the person you're breaking up with and tell them exactly why they're not the one for you. You have to rebuff their attempts to keep things together. You can be as gentle as you can be, but you're going to hurt them. Badly.

Women aren't good with confrontation. So, often, they'll just go completely cold, not saying anything at all, and then give confusing reconciliatory messages between bouts of silence.

Femanons - and I know you can probably recognize this behavior if you're being honest with yourselves - I will tell you right now, this pretty much always comes across as "I don't love you and never really did, but I'll keep you around as a backup plan."
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>>17937146
True. Women lead with the heart an that fucks them in multiple ways. Dudes its either the dick or brains. The dick gets them in trouble but the brain overanalyzes and draws conclusions where there are none, see >>17937140 and >>17937147
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>>17937166
>Women lead with the heart an that fucks them in multiple ways

yeah, seems like it. i have had ex's do crazy shit and there reason was "it felt right".
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>>17936857
Yes this is it OP. Dont let her win, leave her for good. No contact
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>>17937175
Exactly. Feelings. You ask a dude "why did you fuck that?" its more than likely "....i dont know".
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>>17936830
No contact.

Maybe in a few years the stars will align and it might happen, but don't bank on that. Focus on yourself and moving on, bettering yourself, and forget about her however hard that will be. Breaking up is never hard, and having to deal with it the last few months myself, the best advice I have in this situation is to just not respond, and to move on. It'll get easier with time, anon. I wish you the best.
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>>17937189
>Maybe in a few years the stars will align and it might happen, but don't bank on that

He shouldn't even allow that. She's made her bed. She wants to fuck other guys. OP will not be her backup plan
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>>17936830
As nearly everyone else in the thread has said, ignore her. Block her if you feel like it, but at the very least don't talk to her, even if she messages you first. No more contact at all and move on.
Also sorry anon, that really sucks.
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>>17937218
>She wants to fuck other guys

how do you know its this? it might be some family issues.
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>>17937234
Girls are that predictable famalam
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>>17937234

Girls ALWAYS want to fuck guys. Even if she tells you she's not gonna when she dumps you, it's a lie. She's gonna fuck at least one rando to maintain her mojo.

You should be fucking girls too.
>>
Not OP, but I've been doing no contact with my ex.

Yesterday was her birthday and I didn't text her. Usually she makes a huge deal out of her birthday, but she didn't post anything on social media and nobody told her happy birthday because she took her bday off of FB and didn't post an instagram picture mentioning it.

I feel kind of bad, but I know I should stick with no contact. She seems to be depressed and lonely right now, and I have a strong urge to text her, but I know if she wanted to talk to me she would reach out.

Stick with no contact forever right?
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>>17937306
Depends on your situation. If its very similar to OPs, youre a fucking retard for feeling bad...or feeling anything at all for that matter. Cause shes technically just another rando to you now. Or supposed to be anyway.
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>>17937310

Yeah I know that's how it is, but my situation is different.

I'm going to stick with no contact, because you're right. The fact that I feel anything means the effects of no contact are still processing, and I have to do more time to be completely over her.

Not texting her on her birthday gave me a big boost, though. I feel good about myself for not reaching out, it's for the best.
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>>17937146
Women are culturally taught not to be assertive or confrontational. You can see it on 4chan a lot - a woman asserts herself, and immediately gets called a bitch.

It sounds like this girl wants new experiences (possibly including new sexual experiences, though that's getting derided by the boys here, as is expected) and there's nothing wrong with that. But we're conditioned to not always assert ourselves and to feel bad if we hurt someone and so it can be hard for us to do it.

It is extremely tough for me to reject a guy, even one I have no interest in. I will feel sick for days afterwards. I have yet to break up with someone I care about (always the dumpee, never the dumper), but I could have seen myself acting like OP's ex had I not experienced the other side of it - clarifying my feelings, thinking of a better way to say something, avoiding meeting the person face to face, etc.

She's being terrible, but I can relate to what she's going through.
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>>17937317
My ex's birthday is about to come up but I doubt she's gonna be depressed or lonely. I've been doing no contact but the second I see her post anything with another guy or how happy she is without me, I feel like I would break and cave in. How do you do it when she's so much happier than you?
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>>17937339
Not give a shit what other people are doing. Because thats what shes supposed to be to you now. Another person.
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>>17937339
If you have her still on fb you can block her stuff from appearing on your feed. You just have to have the willpower to not actually go on her page
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>>17937332
>Women are culturally taught not to be assertive or confrontational

Stop with this shit. It's in their nature. Nobody is teaching them this shit
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>>17937332
Im sorry but i have to say it. Your post makes absolutly no fucking sense. Youre saying that youre conditioned to not hurt feelings and not stand up for yourself and to point an example you use fucking /b/.

Men get pissed when you fuck with their feeling and drag them on for a ride because YOU cant make up your fucking mind. But just breaking up and moving on and you hurt a someones feelings from that well shit happens. Two different scenarios.
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>>17937132
Why does looking immature and an ass matter if he's never going to see or speak to her again?
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>>17937339

I'm actually really happy after the breakup. I fucked a lot of girls and had a few short term gf's, so that probably helped.

Always keep in mind that social media isn't real life. You're not seeing the behind the scenes, just the highlights.

My ex was posting a lot on insta for a while, and I honestly pitied her. She'd post a selfie with a corny caption trying to make it seem all casual, but she would be wearing a mask of makeup and you know she spent at least an hour preparing and taking that picture.

Stop comparing your life to other people's, and gtfo social media.

Since I went no contact my ex cut down on social media dramatically. I think knowing she could have me back whenever she wanted was giving her an ego boost, and she felt empowered knowing I'd be seeing her sexy selfies. Lol I was just laughing at how petty she was being and how hard she was trying. The only thing I posted since we broke up was a video of my Shiba Inu and some concert clips. Other than that I've been ghost mode.

Don't text her on her birthday, don't do it. You'll regret it. The most you'll get is a "thank you."
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>>17937361
Yes they are. No one is directly teaching them that, but it's in the ether.

Studies show that women are less likely to speak up in class, ask for raises, etc, but when societal expectations are removed, they are actually more assertive than men. Put societal expectations back into place, and they become timid.

http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167294201003
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>>17937332
>>17937361

Woman says men tell women to be quiet.

Man tells her to be quiet, men don 't do that.
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>>17937400
>http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167294201003

All that study says is women act worse when they think no one is watching. Did you even look at it?
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>>17937409

Woman confuses 'telling an individual woman to be quiet' with 'telling all women everywhere to be quiet', makes dumbass shitpost that she thinks is clever and snarky
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>>17937453
Yeah, that's pretty typical. Insult a woman and it's an insult against all women from the beginning to the end of time. This election was proof of it
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>>17937332

> my shitty behavior is ACTUALLY all men's fault

fucking women stg

Also any dude who said something along the lines of "Oh I dumped my gf of two years who was planning our future together because I wanted new experiences, including sexual ones!" would be derided as a shallow sex-obsessed idiot and ruthlessly pilloried for trying to dress up his basic "I wanna fuck more things" urge with flowery presumptuous language about experiences
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>>17937461
This. Though in my case she's only ever been with me so I can see how she would want to experience other people. Doesn't make that shit right though
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>>17937461
I never said it was men's fault, I think women are at fault as much as men are. I just said it's in our cultural ether for women to be taught to be passive and nice. It is certainly no individual person's fault, nor any specific gender's fault.

I'm kind of shocked this is getting pushback, considering you see it everywhere, all the time.
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>>17937528
>I just said it's in our cultural ether for women to be taught to be passive and nice.

Because it's not. It's ingrained. There is no reason for a cavewoman to be assertive
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>>17937429
It's about playing video games. Did you look at it?
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>>17937528
>considering you see it everywhere, all the time

...i dont. Im a blue collar guy that works with women and nowhere were women more respected than when they put their foot down. Theres a difference in being just a bitch, and being a cast iron bitch.
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>>17937370
It's about not being rude. It shows that you're not a cunt that loses his temper over something where the other party wasn't using language like that.
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Look, femanon here. I've seen female friends pull this shit many times. She's confused and hurt, and doesn't want to be seen as 'the bad guy'. You're her learning experience, and she's not going to come back but wants to keep you around either as a backup or out of some misguided notion that it'll make you feel better and somehow absolve her of guilt for breaking up with you in such a way.

Just tell her to get out of your life, not angrily because that'll make you look immature, but so that you can both move on. She needs to hear that she can hurt people, and that you can't break up with someone out of the blue and not be blamed, which is what she wants you to tell her (that it's not her fault etc. etc.).

Block her number, move on.
>>
>>17937528

Where do you see it? I don't see it anywhere

What I DO see are a bunch of people claiming that it's happening in ways that make me think they don't understand shit

Like the whole "Don't call girls bossy, call them leaders!" thing. Guess what? Guess what a big, fundamental part of leadership is? Having your underlings shit-talk and gripe about you. A *fundamental* leadership skill is to be able to listen to this type of talk, not get butthurt about it, and realize where they might be correct about you overstepping your authority or pushing them too hard. Being a leader is not this glorious thing where everyone looks up to you - only the shittiest politicians believe that. By telling people never to call little girls bossy, you're cutting them off at the knees by removing a very necessary experience on the path to becoming a leader
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>>17937804
OP here. Wouldn't not responding at all be the best option? I feel like giving her a response is exactly what she wants to possibly validate to herself that she made the right decision in leaving me
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>>17937907
Yeah, just don't respond, for your own emotional wellbeing. The best revenge is success and happiness, so move on, meet someone new and be happy.
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>>17937907

Yes not responding at all is a larger statement than sending a response.

No contact means no contact. If she wants to rekindle things, she was to be the one who brings it up. until she does, ignore everything she sends you.
>>
>>17937166
>>17937175
>>17937146

>Women are irrational and crazy and driven by FEELINGS and guys are RATIONAL AND LOGIC
>"WHY DON'T I HAVE AN OUTLET FOR MY FEELINGS I FEEL LIKE TRASH MY FRIENDS TELL ME TO MAN UP???"

You realize that you guys are digging your own graves and then complaining about it too right?
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>>17937916
>>17937918
No contact seems like the best option here. Thanks
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>>17936830
she had been fucked by multiple guys already.. most of afrodescendent heritage.
I'd just ignore the test.
>>
>>17937944
I think you should respond. There are ways of winning her back.
>>
>>17936830
>>17938006
OP do you want her back, or do you just want to know why she left you?
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>>17936830
This is rather unbelievable. I've heard of women keeping men as backups/plan B's and vice-versa but she's being so incredibly transparent about it.

>I don't want to be in the back of your mind as an option
LOL so what's with the fucking text??? People are so stupid sometimes honestly.
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>>17938015
I want her back more than anything. Even after this childish shit. She gave me the reason she broke up with me almost 2 weeks later via text message after refusing to meet up and talk about it in person
Here's the reason 1/3
>>
>>17938040
2/3
>>
>>17938035
Yeah I didn't get that either

>>17938046
3/3. I've always had a thing about giving girls oral. The smell is just unbearable.
>>
>>17938046
>>17938052

>Being the literal definition of /pol/
.
I would leave too
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>>17938052
So basically, you're /pol/ tier political and you're surprised that your average girl doesn't like that?

Look, I am a girl, and my current (only) bf has gone through /pol/ fashy phases. We nearly broke up over it, and he didn't have the misogyny overlay that many /pol/ types do.

I don't think you should be surprised that she left you for it. Political differences matter. It took me a long time to reconcile my own politics with my bf's.

>The smell is just unbearable.
It shouldn't be if she cleans herself properly. It should just taste kind of salty and not smell.
>>
>>17938058
>>17938073
One of the things I'm changing is dropping /pol/ completely since those aren't even my real opinions. This election cycle just got me hooked. Also she must not have been cleaning properly.
>>
>>17938040
lmao OP you fucked up.
Now you have show her that you are a pussy and she will wipe the floor with you.
>>
>>17938077
What do you actually believe? Do you honestly think a girl having sex once makes her a slut? Did you tell her she should be in the kitchen? Do you thin all black men are inferior? Do you believe gays should be electro shocked?

These are not views most women would put up with, particularly the ones on women.

Only professional victims and raging masochists date misogynists.
>>
>>17938089
>Do you honestly think a girl having sex once makes her a slut?
No but my uni is one of the top party school and 90% of the people I met there were sluts. I don't respect promiscuous girls
>Did you tell her she should be in the kitchen?
No. I have respect for women but not promiscuous ones
>Do you thin all black men are inferior?
No only the ghetto ones
>Do you believe gays should be electro shocked?
No. I have gay friends and family. I just don't think they should have kids. I feel that that would just skew the kids perception of a family and fuck them up in the long term
>Only professional victims and raging masochists date misogynists.
I wouldn't call myself a misogynist
>>
>>17938089
>niggers
>not inferior
pick one
>>
>>17938112
Do you not respect promiscuous guys? do you have the same level of disdain for them? if the answer is no, then you're at the very least a bit sexist and the 'professional victims and raging masochists' comment still stands.
>>
are you either an Alex or a Ryan?

You fucked up kid.
>>
>>17938121
A keythat canopen many locksis called a masterkey, but a lock that can be opened bymany keysis a shitty lock
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>>17938116
Now now, I didn't state my opinions on any of these topics. I just said that most modern women won't like them in their SO.
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>>17938126
Only happens to weak men
>>
>>17938125

A pencil that goes into a bunch of pencil sharpeners becomes useless and needs to be thrown away but the pencil sharpener does the same thing regardless of how many pencils goes into it.

Your metaphor is flawed and cannot be applied to people.
>>
>>17938148
It doesn't matter. It has been one way for thousands of years and it won't change anytime soon. A virgin will always be more valuable than a non-virgin. It's just the way it is.
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>>17938121
I don't respect promiscuous guys either. I'm just old fashioned in that I really only like to sleep with people I'm in love with
>>
>>17938137
Well 'strong men' can only find traditional women to be their submissive housewives. Nothing wrong with that if that's what you want, but I specified modern women. Not old fashioned ones.
>>
>>17936830
I went through the same exact type of thing when I was in college and didn't cut it off when I should have. She is probably getting with someone else and is manipulating you, even if she isn't deliberately doing it. You are better off cutting her out of your life completely.
>>
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>>17938159
>modern women
pump and dump material only, that is all they're useful for
>>
>>17938158
Look, once she starts thinking you're this, that and the other in terms of /pol/ it's a lost cause. Please just move on. She won't want you back.

Most women, actually most people don't want to know the tin tacs of something, and the general consensus in the media and mainstream is that 4chan is full of /pol/ types and is a big bogeyman.

The only reason I was well, more reasonable with my bf when he went through the /pol/ phase was because I went and looked for myself, and although I disagreed with a lot of it, some of the ideas have a kernel of truth to them.

I went out of my way to read some fascist literature, to look into other ideas that were not the ones my family has and I have been socialised to understand, to try to understand my bf's politics.

Although I don't agree with a lot, I can still respect some of it as a genuine ideology, and it leads to some fun political debates. Most girls won't do that though, they just want a man who conforms unquestioningly to their own beliefs, and who wont challenge them.
>>
>>17938163
Look, I'm not trying to argue over this topic. OP's ex clearly thinks like this, and that is who I'm trying to help. I'm not endorsing her views, nor am I disavowing them. I'm just trying to give advice to this situation.
>>
>>17936857
/thread
>>
>>17938180
OP just needs to ignore her. She's no good for him.
>>
>>17937164
Nah, more like..

"hah, I've been talking to somebody else, but I'm gonna use this guy I just dumped as my emotional crutch so that I can smoothly transition into this new dick."

women are horrible creatures.. a lot of em.
>>
>>17938190
Obviously, as she's keeping him as backup. But he's still in love.
>>
>>17938202
I am. I was adamant that she was the one. I've been in several relationships before her but she was the best of the best. That's what's making this so much harder than usual to get over
>>
> Woman breaks up with /pol/tard because /pol/tard talks and acts like a /pol/tard
> "WHAT A NO-GOOD MANIPULATIVE WHORE"
> "UGH WHY ARE ALL WOMEN SO HORRIBLE?"

I know you guys are busy with your heads up your asses, but you should really take a peek out here and see what I'm seeing, it's pretty funny.
>>
>>17937164
> I know you can probably recognize this behavior if you're being honest with yourselves
Well, as I've only ever been in one relationship (barring a couple of two weeks to one month long no kissing or anything innocent 14 year old ones) and am still with that man, I don't recognise it, but I've seen it with my friends.
>>
>>17938229
Did you really tell her that her favourite musical artists are whores? That's pretty autist tbqh.
>>
>>17938240
It isn't about the break up though. It's how she is treating him as a back up plan.
>>
>>17938240
Once she's written you off for your political views, and decided she's happier without you, it's a lost cause. I'm really sorry this has happened, and I really hope you find someone else, because this sucks.

I would advise you to drop the /pol/ ideology, if you want another girl, because not liking women significantly shrinks your dating pool.
>>
>>17938229
Want to know how to keep your women? Stop being a dipshit and get off /pol/. Do the therapy thing she was talking about, and maybe you'll be able to learn how to normie.

Seriously OP, this wasn't what I thought, this wasn't some fleeting "I have no idea what I want so I might as well bone a bunch of guys until I figure it out" bullshit, she actually gave you a concise list of areas for you to improve on. If I were you, I'd try and figure out what's accurate and work on improving. Not for her, for yourself.
>>
>>17938247
The only one I called a whore was ariana grande and she fucking is
>>
>>17938262
Granted, but what does telling your girlfriend that accomplish other than to insult her?
Also, get a girl with better music taste.
>>
>>17938250
This. I know i fucked up. I'm fixing myself now. But how she handled the breakup was childish and just not right

>>17938261
Already on it. I'm learning to cook, getting back in shape, doing therapy, and getting off of /pol/ for good

>>17938269
Yes, I didn't see how it was hurting her. There's a lot of things she just could have COMMUNICATED like normal people do in a relationship. What I did was wrong but she also did not know how to voice her concerns
>>
>>17938276
Yeah, leave /pol/. It seriously fucks with your mind.
>>
>>17938276
Out of curiosity OP, what is it that you liked so much about this girl?
>>
>>17938281
Pros:
>Down to earth and rational
>didn't act solely based on emotion like most girls
>hands down the most attractive girl I've ever dated and she almost never wore makeup because she looked that good
>best sex I've ever had
>played video games even before I met her
>loved studio ghibli movies
>taught me a lot about animation
>we did 3 gamejams at my university together and won 2 of them (one best overall and the other for best art thanks to her)
>the cutest laugh I've ever heard in my life
>the sweetest smile
>Amazing hair and perfect pale skin
>someone I could start a business with (I was a programmer and she was an artist and we had a little gamejam experience so I figured we would start a game company at some point after doing our internships)
>introverted like me
>the most passionate girl I've ever dated
>told me she loved me ~100 times a day
>made me start liking myself a little more (though therapy is helping with the rest)
>I never once doubted our relationship like I have with others, it felt right from beginning to end. It felt like it was meant to be
>our personalities complemented each others perfectly

Cons:
>She enabled my laziness even more since she was lazier than me and had the lightest course load ever (but that's something I'm working on too is to be more active)
>>
>>17938329
She sounds lovely, but not unique. I'm sure you'll find someone else.
>>
>>17938360
The problem is she's set the bar super high. Idk if I'll ever find anyone better
>>
>>17938384
Look dude, you basically described my gf, except that my gf also likes reading and art house movies (which I like too). There can't be only two in the whole world.
>>
>>17938388
Either way it's like finding a needle in a haystack. I've sifted through so much shit so far in college to find an untouched diamond. Now I'm back sifting through garbage again
>>
>>17938397
To find an untouched diamond?

Ugh.
>>
>>17936850
This here, do this OP
>>
>>17938412
I'm not worried about untouched though that was a perk. I just mean someone as good as her

>>17936850
>>17938421
Yeah I hope she hears about what she's missing out on once I've got my shit together
>>
>>17938040
>>17938046
>>17938052
God, I'd leave you too.
Guess what, OP, women don't like to listen to men judge other women because of the way they dress even if they do that themselves.
Also, Steven Universe is an awful show but your view on gay rights sounds retarded
>>
>>17938433
So after reading through this thread and after getting those messages from your ex, what would you say you've learned the most? (About yourself, about the relationship, about what you should do next and etc)
>>
>>17938433
Oh ok, I retract my ugh.
>>
>>17938494
About me:
>That I need therapy to change myself and I couldnt just change on my own
>that /pol/ corrupted me more than I thought
>that I'm a little more selfish than I thought
>that I have some work to do to make myself better before I date anyone else
>that despite all of this mess, I still think she's the one. Maybe I'm just holding on too much

About the relationship:
>She didn't communicate
>She's two faced because she had been planning on breaking up with me since thanksgiving but acted like everything was fine up until the very end
>She wasn't as emotionally mature as I thought
>She blamed the break up 100% on me when she had a hand in it considering she didn't communicate properly when something was bothering her
>last semester I got too complacent and didn't treat her as well as I did before (didn't really go out of my way for her like I did before)

Funny thing is she told me at the beginning that if something bothered her she'd bring it up immediately. That was not the case. She brought up therapy once but didn't mention anytging else

What to do next:
>get back in shape
>learn to cook (for my health and just because it's a good skill to have)
>go to therapy twice a week to deal with my self hate and selfishness
>stop sitting around most of the day
>stay off of /pol/
>find some bitches on tinder to help me get over this
>smoke a fuckton of weed to also help cope
>>
>>17938599
As a female, I fucking despise Trump and wouldn't touch a supporter of his with a 10 foot pole. /pol/ is a dump.

Good riddance.
>>
>>17938599
If she had told you that she hated your political views, what would you have done anyway?
>>
>>17938612
Hey, if Hillary won it'd be business as usual. At least now everything has a chance to burn down and be rebuilt.
>>
>>17938666
Considering I'm just spouting shit from /pol/, it's not even really my opinion. Plus breaking up with someone over differing political views is the dumbest shit ever
>>
>>17938703
No its not, if you feel strongly about it. It says something about your character, if you're right or left.

Say you're right wing and traditionalist, and she's left wing. You're probably going to want her to be a housewife, whereas she'll want to have her own life and career.

Politics are symptomatic of the kind of personality one has. It's not dumb at all to take that into account when choosing a mate, unless both parties are completely apolitical.
>>
>>17938040
>>17938046
>>17938052
Lmao are you me?

The only difference is my ex adopted my political beliefs.. I'm also a raging christian.. she didn't seem to have a problem with either of these things..

Honestly your chick is just using cop outs because she doesn't want to feel like a slut. Don't blame it on /pol/ I don't believe any of this is correlated
>>
>>17936830
>no contact meme
kek my ex wife said we shouldn't talk anymore but every few months i get a text or call still
>>
>>17938810
Don't be stupid. Most women would hate /pol/'s beliefs.
>>
>>17938384
>>17938388
My ex gf was a tall brunette with pale skin and never had to wear make up either.. she was so beautiful.. she's using these same tactics on me bro. Stay strong go no contact until she breaks or you find another girl
>>
>>17938718
I'm fine with a woman going out and working. She'll just be in debt for a while from student loans and I doubt she'll find a well paying job with a digital art meme degree. I'm registered as independent. I'm only slightly right leaning

>>17938833
Here's to hoping the no contact meme works and has both of our exs crawling back
>>
>>17938833
Not OP, (the other guy), I'm still with my gf mate, love her more than anything.
>>
Wait a couple years, what else.
>>
>>17938814
Yeah if they're SJWs, in which case they still often get off to rape fantasies and being dominated. I've been pretty fucking upfront with every girl I've been interested in, even the some what SJWs and while they generally aren't on my side, they accept it.

But I also don't run around like a fucking nut screaming hail hitler in front of every one.
>>
>>17938052
Dude you sound like a depressive douche. I wouldn't have stuck around either.
>>
>>17938866
Not just SJWs. Most women aren't exactly comfortable with an ideology that espouses views that they aren't human, are children, are only good for sex or breeding, are whores and sluts and worse than dogs.
>>
I just went through similar shit, but back in September. She dumped me, and then gave me false hopes of getting back together. I was happy.

Then just a few weeks ago, she got with a dude I was always kinda suspicious of, and broke my heart all over again.

Don't fucking respond, man. Don't put yourself in a position for her to kill you again. Someone better is out there. Find her.
>>
I broke up with my ex-GF 3 months ago, and I learned about a month ago, she is going back to her abusive ex-fiance, who raped her a year ago. I e-mailed her about it and yelled abuse at her. She said he cheated on her in less than a week, but she still wants to be together with him, believing he would change. The bastard is going to have another kid with another woman soon. It's insane. Why the fuck would anyone be with such a person? Anyways, we had an awful e-mail exchange; I was so angry to the point that I wanted to punch her in the face. Things she used to say about him are totally 180 now; like how he is peaceful, loving, and caring. She said she considers me violent than her ex because I yelled abuse at her. I don't know; I hate myself.

I am shocked, and I am also guilty that I called her a whore, a retard, and a bitch. Should I ask for forgiveness?
>>
>>17939003
No, she sounds like a moron, but you shouldn't be abusive either. Just don't yell at the next one and forget this girl.
>>
not only you were stupid but you were a stupid bitch

even if you dont respect certain women or her music or anything

who cares?
do you really need a buddy who thinks exactly the same as your partner?
can you argue without anger for your point? women like that, they eat up the most stupid shit if you can do it

you got some growing up to do
be smarter, bitch less

she wasnt properly cleaning herself probably though
>>
oh btw if you want any glimpse of hope getting her back

heres what you do
you tell her the following and nothing else

>i was a whiny bitch
>i am sorry

then leave her be, get your life going
she will be watching you(this is a 100% percent, they stalk exes), maybe she will not be able to get you out of her head for the potential she saw in you
maybe she will

the point is you need to grow the fuck up
>>
>>17939009

I was so angry; this girl gave me so much pain, but I still care for her, and I don't want her to fuck her life. When she said she fucked him again, I couldn't control it. I had been cucked by her; she used to fuck with my heart and my head, toy around with me. I told her I was not her nice guy anymore. Her last reply was, "You are scum, like your uncle and the guy who raped you". My uncle beat my mother so bad that she tried to kill herself, and I was raped as a kid. I haven't responded to it yet. I am so heartbroken.
>>
>>17936857
/thread
>>
>>17939040
Wow man that's some heavy stuff
>>
>>17938280
Return to reddit my man. What does /pol/ have to do with this? You're just looking for an oppurtunity to push your blue pill shit on him

>you lost your gf because you browse /pol/
>>
>>17938612
>As a female

Opinion disregarded.

You should have a trip so I can block you
>>
>>17939272
Did you read the texts? She literally said she didn't like his politics and that's why she left.
>>
>>17939003
No don't. She is a retarded whore bitch
>>
>>17939284
She needs to practice some of that liberal tolerance
>>
>>17939295
>liberal
>tolerance
Pick one
>>
OP don't respond. Just close this chapter on life and think "Well that didn't last or end like I hope it would but I got these experiences out of it overall". Some people find it easier to imagine that person is dead and gone. Tbh they're kinda right as she'll change after dumping you. Everyone does a little.

>>17937306
>No contact
>Checking her FB

That's not how it works anon
>>
>>17939891
OP here, should I delete her off of facebook? It's so god damn hard to. Every time I think about doing it I chicken out
>>
>>17939909
Yes. I know it feels hard but curiosity killed the cat is a saying for a reason. You'll eventually find something you don't like and ruminate over it. Also it keeps you attached to her. You need to move on and keeping her on your social media prevents/delays that.

t. Idiot who took 7 months to do this and ended up more messed up from checking her feed
>>
>>17939909
delete

DELEEEETE!!!!

GAME OVER.

GAME

OVER!

NO MORE!

Delete your fb too, get off that poison.
>>
Hey do us a favor and text her " I know you cheated on me" and see what happens. It's just a hunch, but planning to break up, especially for that long a period of time is strange to me. Then unfriend her on fb.
>>
>>17936830
similar situation listen to>>17936850
>truth being told
>>
>>17939934
Yeah if I saw her with someone else it would kill me. It's just so hard to click that button
>>
>>17939272
neck yourself faggot. Fucking good goy yank cunt.
>>
I don't get society, what would be so wrong with telling this girl "fuck you, piece of shit"?

It would be accurate and satisfying then you can block.
>>
>>17940124
Because then you're the bad guy (atleast in her eyes). Wouldn't you rather have her feel like shit for never getting a response at all?
>>
>>17936830
Do not reply. People also pull this shit when the next man they are hopping to starts ghosting them right after they leave the first. The future possibility she is mentioning reeks of " if i dont find anything better"
>>
>>17940358
I was kinda thinking this but at the moment I really don't think there's anyone else. I'm sure she wants to try new people since I'm all she's had but still
>>
>>17940654
You've got to RAPE her anon!!! SEXUALLY DESTROY HER

Ruin her... Go insane! Use drugs!!!!!!!
>>
>>17940670
>>>/b/
>>
Block her number
>>
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>>17936857
/thread?
>>
>>17941547
/thread.
>>
I got an idea for OP

Just say "Okay."

THEN block her
>>
>steven universe

FORGET

ABOUT

HER

major red flag. Send her text saying Steven memeverse is a shit show and she should have been gassed in the auschwitz for watching that garbage, and then block her number.
>>
This is an advice coming from a woman.

She's just playing you. She doesn't want you back, she just wants to know that you still think about her and that she still has an influence on you. That's what she wants. Do not take that as she'd really even care about your feelings that much. She might feel bad for just leaving you like that, but the only reason she wants to apologize is that it would make her feel good.

Do not give her that pleasure. I highly suggest that you either don't reply to her text at all or you just tell her that it was for the better and you guys are good, there's no hard feelings and wish her to have a good semester too.

I normally wouldn't advice anyone to play these games but for the love of god, she's just playing you and needs to be back in place. Do not get back together with her or even engage in discussion. It doesn't make any difference. Just wash your hands and move on. It's hard, but it's the only thing to do. If she was worth dating, she would have dumped you with a respectable manner, giving you closure. And then she would have walked out from your life as she wished. Now she's just emotionally torturing you for her own pleasure.
>>
>>17941825
>
Better to not say anything. Am girl. That would drive me fucking CRAZY.
>>
>>17936857
/treade
>>
>>17942026
I guess that's the point :^)
>>
>>17938612

You speak for all women do you petal?
>>
>>17936830

There are two types of people. There are people who don't feel guilty when they cheat and there are those who do. Your ex falls in the latter part.
>>
Literally listen to what everyone else is telling you. Don't respond and just block. Just do it. Seriously, we wouldn't be telling you this if we didn't think it was gonna work cause we've been where you were and we've tried to salvage relationships just like this and you know what happened? we got even more hurt and we ended up wasting even more time trying to chase 1(one) girl.
>>
>>17938116

I'm more superior than you Jefro
>>
>>17942167
Lol'd for truthfulness
>>
>>17936830
I'm sure you know what everyone wants you to do, OP. Honestly, don't waste your time with her anymore. You got hurt and now you (hopefully) learned your lesson.

Now, better yourself, go out and experience life. Find another girl who'll actually respect and love you. Your ex is not "The One". She's just a generic person, like all of us.
>>
>>17937332
>It is extremely tough for me to reject a guy, even one I have no interest in. I will feel sick for days afterwards.

Please be my girlfriend? Pretty please?
>>
>>17936830

I can relate to you man, my ex did a very similar thing, probably much worse than you had it, the whole break up was a mind-fuck. It took maybe 2 months after we broke up for all the pieces to fall into place and for things to make perfect sense because of how badly she handled every aspect of the break up and my feelings. Once they have made their decision to break up with you, immediately block and remove them from your life, absolutely no contact at all. My mistake was buying into her mind-games afterwards because I wanted to believe she thought she was making a mistake and wanted to wind up together blah blah blah, it's all bullshit, I think the fact they wanted out with you at all is the final nail in the coffin, there's no coming back from that desire expressed to a partner.

Once I got a grip on myself I ignored her further messages completely, less than a week from her final message sent to me she was already in a new relationship. And looking back on our break up some of the many things she stressed a lot was that she needed to find herself, had no interest in other guys, I still own her heart, wanted to wind up together, needs to be single and alone to become independent, has absolutely no desire for anyone else.

Worst part is, there was no prior evidence of lying or manipulation throughout our relationship, it's like she changed her entire personality during the break up.
>>
>>17936830
What a cunt.

Delete the message.
>>
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WA HA HA!!! This thread is still online??!?? Oh my goddddddd...
>>17937332
Get back in here, sweetheart!! Give these fat weaboo kids a thrill! Google a picture of tits and tell us they're yours, I promise to not check!!
>>
>>17937332
You women get off scot-free enough already. Learn to take responsibility for your own damn actions
>>
if you respond you show her:
youre weak and you need her
she can play around with your feelings and nothing bad will come of it
she can get away with whatever she wants
she holds all the power
she doesnt respect you
she loves you less than you love her
she can throw you away again when she gets bored or angry or unhappy

if you dont respond you show her:
she fucked up
shes dumb
you are confident
you respect yourself
you dont trust her or her bullshit
you hold all the power
she cant play with you and get away with it

now choose.
>>
>>17936857
/thread

You could just respond with k and then block, even better.
>>
>>17939040
Just Kek at her and tell her words don't mean shit from a cold hearted bitch
>>
>>17938599
To be honest, you seem like a real asshole who emotionally neglected her. She did try to get you into therapy (kind of a serious hint something is wrong isn't it?) and you still blame her for not communicating. She probably communicated a million times but you didn't see it. And you still don't.
>>
>>17944183
t. Toastie McRoastie!

Take off your pants and bend over, roastie!
>>
>>17944205
Nope, I'm a guy. But it seems pretty clear it was OP's fault. For chrissakes she begged him to go to therapy and still OP thinks she didn't communicate the problems of the relationship.
>>
>>17944213
No she only brought that up once and we both agreed to talk about it after finals. She never made any mention of the problems she had like where she thought I wasn't going out of my way for her enough or that she had a problem with my views. That's on her for not communicating. My fault was not (apparently) going out of my way for her when i know that I did
>>
>>17944755

If you're getting so defensive and don't agree with the reasons she gave you then likely they were just excuses or her wanting to break up with you as opposed to actual reasons. Because like you said if she communicated her issues better a lot of what she said could have been avoided, but she didn't. Perhaps because she didn't want to change you to suit her needs and just wanted someone who wanted and believed the same things without having to ask.

Or perhaps she just wanted out and listed a bunch of petty reasons without trying to work on them that put together look like a reasonable reason to break up with someone.
>>
>>17936830
As everyone else has said, do not respond and forget about this message. She either sees the mistake she made or is desperate. You now have the control in this situation and cutting her out of your life will hurt her the most. She made her decision, and even if you want her back or you miss her, show her that if anything, it's your choice no hers.
>>
>>17936850
This. end of thread.
>>
OP here. Finally worked up the courage to delete her off of facebook. Fuck guys this is hard. I'm still so in love with this girl so the grieving process will be brutal. I'm not used to sleeping alone

>>17944774
Yeah I've thought of that. The only thing I know that I did wrong for sure was have a shitty attitude towards myself and now I'm working on it because that's what I need. For me.

I know that I just need to focus on me and block all communication. I'm working on myself by: learning to cook, going to therapy, being more organized, getting back in shape, and learning to be more selfless. I know i can do it but it'll be a lot of work. This is the toughest breakup I've ever been through because this is the strongest I've ever felt towards someone. I really need to learn to be happy on my own though before I get with anyone or back with her. That was my main problem
>>
>>17944092

I "kek'd" at her, told her that she was indeed the dumbest bitch I've ever dated in my life.

I am worried for her kid, though. Her father shoved her kid once. He is clinically diagnosed autistic, and he is very dangerous. You know once, her kid was licking on her toes because her dad has a feet fetish and later on, her psych evaluation said she was traumatized. Bitch didn't anything about it and let him go free. She is so horrible, man. She hasn't even vaccinated her because vaccines cause autism. I am such a dilemma; should I tell her dad about it?
>>
Don't respond, OP. Push her out of your life for now, take it from me, if you keep them close by during the healing process it will fuck you up so bad.
There's nothing I can say to make this better for you right away, this is gonna take time to heal, but I know you can do it. If you need someone to talk to, add me on discord, bro. Stay strong friendo.
Cojax#2195
>>
Just block and ignore. Nothing else to really say unless you want to run the risk of her fucking with your emotions even more.
>>
>>17945128

Yeah just work on all of the things you listed, take this as a learning experience as she probably has too. Your life will likely improve as a result of this if you put your energy into bettering yourself. Since she is the one that dumped you, don't ever initiate contact with her, you didn't necessarily end on bad terms so let her find out about your new improved life herself and who knows she might want to try again down the track.

But don't expect or count on anything happening, simply remove all traces of her and try your best to move on with your life. At the very least even if she doesn't want you back she will likely snoop around and check up on you just to see how you're doing, and if it looks like you've benefited from the break up a lot and grown as an individual it will show her what kind of man you are.
>>
>>17936830
Ignore it, and whatever you do, don't contact her. Keep her out of your life as you did for past 2 years and just continue with yours.
>>
>>17945517
Thanks. This is just excruciating. I never could have possibly seen this coming
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