So I met this girl at the start of the year. She is literally everything I've ever wanted from a partner. At the start of our relationship everything was great. After about 3 months (she lived with me for about 1 month of that time) she told me she'd had a boyfriend the whole time who lived in a different city. I know she hadn't been seeing him at all during our time together because we literally did everything together.
Anyway, she moved back to the city her boyfriend lived in and told him the truth about everything. He said he'd forgive her if she cut all contact with me and deleted me from everything and all that. She didn't do that but she pretended to.
Cut to now, due to work I'm now in the same city as her and we've been seeing each other again. We've been spending all our time together and doing everything we used to do. She's still so perfect and I still love her. But every weekend she goes and stays with her long term boyfriend and it fucking kills me...
Basically I don't know what to do... I think I should forget about her and move on but I don't know if I can. Should I tell her boyfriend she's still been secretly meeting me and fucking me? Would that make her hate me? I'm so fucking lost...
>>17580350
Tell him what's going on as a favor to him, and then cut ALL contact with her. Every single bit of it. If you gave her an ultimatum ala "it's either me or him," she could just as well lie to you about stopping seeing him. Just cut it off, man.
>>17580350
>She's still so perfect
she was never perfect OP. Only in your mind. Both you and her other guy allow her to have two men and think she has always done this. If you or the other guy finally have enough self respect to get away she will bring another guy into the mix.
>>17580350
Dude.
A person who is capable of lying for 3 months about having another long term relationship, and who is capable of lying to her long term boyfriend like this, is perfectly able to lie about everything she is or does.
Cut all contact and move on.
You literally imagined it in your head.
I have been through exactly the same thing. It hurts like crazy. I still think of him every day.
But it's my idea of him, not who he was.
>>17580363
>>17580369
>>17580381
Thanks I think you're all right... but I just don't know how to do it.
>I have been through exactly the same thing. It hurts like crazy
How did you do it?
>>17580403
He was an exchange student, we lived the most perfect love story, he was everything I've ever wanted in a man. He went back to visit for Christmas, I saw a picture on instagram of him kissing another girl. Long term girlfriend, been together since middle school.
He came back, I talked to him, I told him that I knew. He said he loved me but couldn't break up with her, that she was planning their marriage for when he came back, that he wanted to break up with her and be with me and never loved someone as much as me.
I stayed for a bit, then I realised that the trust was broken and he would never break up with her or with me. That he liked the comfort and being loved, and he didn't want to be an asshole. I realised that if he truly loved me, he would have chosen me. I broke up with him. He went back home as soon as he could.
I cried for a month. I lost 13 kg, couldn't eat. Didn't even shower for 2 weeks. I got back on my feet and moved on with my life. I still think of him. I still do miss him.
It's hard, especially at the beginning, but it gets fine. I started dating again now, and it's cool.
>>17580417
Thanks for sharing. Well done for being strong enough to end it, hopefully I'll be able to muster some of that strength...
>>17580417
i miss talking to my best friend.. her boyfriend didnt allow her to talk to me because we start getting feelings for each other. she didnt wanna trade her reationship (5 years) vs me (1 year)