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>first gf >im not her first bf how to deal with this situation?,

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>first gf
>im not her first bf

how to deal with this situation?, what is acceptable and what is not in a relationship?. Because everytime i speak with her about things i don't like she uses the "i have more experience than you in relationships" card to tell me how i must behave. Specially about jealousy, feelings and things like that.
It makes me really upset because we're the same age and im not stupid, but still she treats me like a child who doesn't understand how to behave.
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>>17573387
>Because everytime i speak with her about things i don't like she uses the "i have more experience than you in relationships" card to tell me how i must behave.
Can you give us some more specific examples? I mean, this really isn't a nice way for her to talk to you, but you may also be bitching about trivial things
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>>17573394
one time i told her that i loved her after 2 months and she went crazy like "you don't know what love is, you can't love someone after 2 months, i like you a lot, but you need time to love someone".
How much time are you supposed to spend in order to tell the other person what you truly feel?, is there even a measure for that?. She even told me once while we were on bed that she loved me, and then a few days later she brought up this issue again
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>>17573387
> "i have more experience than you in relationships" card

I'm 27. This is my first real relationship. My girlfriend has never pulled that card.

While this has also never been a problem:
>Specially about jealousy, feelings and things like that.

My gf has complained about me not opening up to her before, and I get it, because that's just how I am with everyone and honestly, I don't take too much in life serious enough for it to bother me (probably specifically because I did WAAAY too much in my youth, and I acknowledged that= it was the source of a lot of my personal anguish, angst, depression, and suicidal thoughts).

Even so, I realize that she has a point to a degree, that now that I'm in a relationship I have to try to make concessions and at least attempt to be more open for her sake

I don't dismiss her, I listen, I try to meet her halfway, and I also let her know that I'm trying, but she has to try too, because the truth is I'm just not someone who feels compelled to dwell on negative things (because of my past) . So we both try.

The fundamental core of relationships are compromise, respect, and trust. And all of those must be mutual. That is a common sense that you don't need to be a relationship expert to understand.

Do you have these three things in your relationship?

If you feel that you do not, build it. Work towards it. Establish it. and do it from both sides. You both need to be working together for it to work.

One side cannot demand something from on high.

If you're having issues with jealousy/etc.and she's complaining about it, instead of dismissing her for being condescending, compromise. Work on it with her, and simultaneously let her know she has to work WITH you, not talk DOWN to you, because that's how a relationship works and it's about mutual respect.


That said, if you're both young, and don't feel like you want to do that, fuck it. This is the time in your life you get a free pass to learn and experiment.
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Make mistakes and learn from them.
Nobody can really tell you how to relationship because everyone is figuring it out as we go along.
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>>17573427
Thanks mate, i really appreciate your advice.
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In my experience, when girls pick a fight it means they need to be fucked.
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>>17573460
So, how many of the sexual crimes you've committed have been justified in your mind?
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>>17573468
Oh, the girls know that they wanna fuck.
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>>17573483
Whoa, seriously? Fuck Bill Cosby, you are the true date rape master.
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>>17573492
Look, friend, when she starts arguing I give her a back massage, and before I know it she's on top of me.

>What more can I say?
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>>17573427
seconding this

also her experience is not indicative of every experience, and her pulling that card on you is just a way for her to "win" instantly if that makes sense. her greater experience or whatever doesn't invalidate your present experiences, and she is not relationship master just because she's been with more people than you.

especially with the love thing, that's absurd. how can she know if you love her or not? she's not you, and love is different for each person.
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>>17573387
Next time she comes to you with that bullshit, just ask her how mcuh experience she has with a relationship with YOU - because surprise,surprise that stuff isn't copy-and-paste.
Or just break it off altogether, because she sounds like a controlling bitch who'll eventually cuck you.
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>>17573387

I'm in this situation right now OP.

>im not her first bf

Expect this to play on your mind a fuckload, it sucks dick so bad.

There's honestly no other way to deal with it, trust me, ive fucking tried, the only thing that makes me feel better is cheating which is a whole other story and leads to more mindfuck problems.
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>>17573387
>"i have more experience than you in relationships" card
That's bullshit because each relationship is different, and in each relationship people figure out the guidelines on what works for them. There are no general "rules" apart from that each should treat the other with respect and honesty, listen, support and encourage them, and try to support them in their goals and aspirations even if they don't quite get them - and of course be faithful.

You just have to talk things out as they appear. Some people are more clingy and comfortable with confessions of love than others.
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>>17574285
This, I don't think pulling that card out is normal
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