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My Boyfriend is depressed please help

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My Boyfriend is depressed please help
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kick em in the testicals

then he'll just be mad not sad
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>>17562866
Everything that is happening wrong in his life is happening. I don't know what to do. I am afraid he might kill himself in the next few weeks when I'm not there.
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I don't know how to react. I don't want to tell someone because I think it will speed up the process and who would I tell who cares? All he has is me and I can't always be there because of work, school, etc. I am in shock right now I don't know what's right.
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>>17562874
Is there any way to have him not be separated from you? If that's not possible and you really think he'll do something, call the looneybin.
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Have you tried anal?
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>>17562866

Give him two spoonfuls of tuna and a glass of strawberry milk. He'll be undepressed in about 67 minutes.

...seriously though, we need more details.
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>>17562866
You'll need to specify a bit more, dude. How depressed is he? Is he suffering from suicidal ideation?

Assure him that you're there for him. Accompany him (if he's comfortable with it) to a doctor/psych to have him screened and prescribed some medication. If he can afford it, suggest that he seek counselling. Just throwing this out there, but if he's in school, many of them offer free counselling.

I know it's hard and that you have no clue what to do. Right now, all you can do is be there for him. But, remember, if it becomes too much for you to bear there is no shame in helping yourself over him.
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>>17562866
cheat on him or leave him just like any normal girl would.
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>>17562906
He has lost everything within a year. Got in a car accident and lost all his money. Finally got a car and it broke down and he had to use all his saved money to fix it. Got surgery and then his boss fired him the week he came back (boss fired like 5 people in the past few weeks for dumb shit reasons). Now all he has is some shitty job while he tries to find something else. He can't pay anything and he keeps telling me he feels useless and if it wasn't for me he would have just offed himself by now.
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>>17562907
I'm not fucking soulless you brain dead stupid shit faggot.
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>>17562923
calm your tits girl I am just telling you the truth how most girls would respond because they can't handle their man being emotionally weaker.
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>>17562915
I'm really sorry to hear that, dude. That's a hard situation.

Again, all you can do is BE THERE for him. Help him find a new job, help him update his resume to make it amazing. If you live together, I sure hope you're helping him pay for things.

It's good that he hasn't offed himself yet. Like I said, be there for him, but remember that the most important person in your life is you, and you shouldn't let yourself suffer because of someone else's mental disorder. Again, bring up the idea of medication/counselling to him. They will assist him in dealing with the shitty hand life has dealt him this past year.
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>>17562958
The problem with money is that we don't live together and I have helped with what I can but I really can't fork over my paychecks. Like I said, I am a student. I only work about 25 hours a week. And I would love to get him to a counselor so he could at least talk everything out but I know he will never go because of money and stuborness.

It's late at night and he sent me a message saying his life was a joke. I offered to come over and he said whatever. Is that a bad sign? Should I sleep on it or just go?
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>>17562978
I'm sorry about the money situation. Is he a student? Like I said, many schools offer free counselling.

He's probably very moody at the moment, based on the first text he said. Having been in a similar situation myself, I did the same thing - just said "whatever". If I were you, I would go.
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>>17562915
IMO physical contact is a really easy thing that can make someone feel better. Cuddling up to him while he tries to go to sleep (he's probably having problems with this) or being close when you're hanging out on the couch might help out. I don't think sex would really be that helpful though.
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>>17563090

Just noting as someone who struggles with depression, my ex trying to cuddle me just made me super fucking mad. She constantly used to ask me what I was thinking, which may have been part of the problem, but still.

Different for different people, of course.
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>>17563096
I'm trying so hard not to ask what he is thinking and testing my cuddle boundaries.

I decided to go over. He has not said one word so far. We are just watching tv.
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Does depression come in spurts? Earlier today he seemed happy and now he is communicating in grunts.

Will he be happier later? What is the best thing I can do to just not be a burden?
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>>17563311

Anon from earlier here.

Yeah, it can easily come in spurts. You forget for a time about what the problem is, or maybe feel like something positive is happening that makes you feel a bit better, but the wave comes crashing back. Just be patient and supportive when he wants to talk.
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>>17562915
Sounds like the guy is having a great year.
Can't wait to see what place he decides to shoot up when he also finds out his gf is cheating on him and is about to leave him for someone hotter and richer.
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>>17563319
Thank you for taking this seriously. I am about 1 step away from completely breaking down and we don't need that between the two of us.

Your words are helpful.
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>>17562866
Tell him you want a 3 way
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Be strong, and supportive. He needs you now more than ever. Don't ask him what he's thinking. That wiki only remind him of his problem. Try to take his mind off of it, and try to give him a sense of safety and support. Hug him, be close to him, bodily contact helps a lot. If he starts talking about his problem, be a good listener, and let him talk. Empathize with him, and always come up with little things that supports him.
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>>17562866
Encourage him to get professional help.
You aren't qualified to help him, neither is /adv/, anything you try will either be you convincing yourself that your intentions mean it will work or you will simply make things worse.
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>>17563096
I can confirm this. Before I gave up on dating, I had one girlfriend. Who was very caring and a nice person, but I found it difficult to open up to her.
I was depressed as fuck at the time, she had found out about my self harm scars and started treating me like a baby. When I was having some insomnia, shitposting on 4chan and playing vidya, she tried to get up randomly to cuddle and such, I didnt turn her down, but it somehow made me feel shittier and her weird behaviour just pissed me off.
I didnt want to feel alone, but I also hated the way she treated me. Like she was walking on glass, tiptoeing around everything.
I didnt know how to tell her that "just you being around here is fine, we dont even have to talk or anything", but that might have been hard on her.
One morning I just had enough of that behaviour and told her that we should break up and never speak again. I was being an asshole about it, but what do you expect when you havent slept in 40hours.

Anywhoo, people feeling like shit can act really weirdly and from stories I've heard from others, its generally best not to tiptoe around the person. Be direct, be there, but dont start treating them like they are helpless little babies. I know men and women alike who absolutely hate that shit.
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>>17563584
Have you gotten better since?
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>>17563630
Yeah, much better with the help of some good friends I got from 4chan at the time of my shitposting spree. Some self improvement and all that.
I was doing so shitty it changed me for good and I do still ocasionally resort to self harm and other stupid impulsive behaviour even if that shit happened like 6 years ago. I will never ever even try to date a girl again though, not because there would be something wrong with girls, its just that Im not really made for dating.

Professional help might be a big one for many people, getting help is the big step, admitting to yourself that you need it and all that. I remember being really ashamed of the idea, but I did briefly attend to some therapy stuff which I ended up hating. Still, it helps many others and I think that for most people its the best, first step to getting better. A depressed person is unlikely to open up to a loved one at first, but will most likely open up to a complete stranger, a "professional".
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>>17563645
So, you got better from company who accepted you, having your mind taken off your problem, and being treated like a human?
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>>17562866
Take him to a doctor not 4chan.
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>>17562866
Jess, I told you: I'm fine.
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>>17562866

JUST leave him for a richer and less sad cunt.

LIKE ANY OTHER WOMAN!!!
Thread posts: 32
Thread images: 4


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