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My bf falsely accused me of cheating. To show him i wasn't,

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My bf falsely accused me of cheating. To show him i wasn't, i gave him my phone to go through and he found a message of making dinner plans with a male friend who's just going through his own break up. He said by going out to dinner with another dude and not telling him, it was emotionally cheating since i was going to dinner with 'romantic intentions'. This was not the case. I just wanted to be a good friend.

So now the bf says i have to prove i'm loyal and trustworthy. When i tell him to go through my messages whenever he wants, he declines and says 'remember what happened last time?' When i try and explain that i love him and only him, he tells me words are just words. And when i try and give him a hug to console, he pushes me away and says this is not how one proves loyalty. I asked how i can prove it and i was told he shouldn't have to explain how and he shouldn't always be the one coming up with solutions.

Am i missing something? Is there a different way i'm to go about this and show i love and respect and care for him? I honestly don't know what to do to make him or the situation better.
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Dump him, you dumbass.
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>>17448433
He's not going to change and will only get worse. You have every right to a circle of friends or a social life that doesn't include him, and it is his job to respect you, not yours to give up your life to him.
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>>17448433
why would you go for a meal with someone who has just broke up with his gf? he was clearly trying to rebound on you. im sure he has male friends he can go out with, and if not, he must be secretly gay. i think your bf is is over exaggerating by calling it cheating but it does sounds stupid of you unless there is more to the story?
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>>17448451
Just a meal as friends. He knows i'm in a relationship and has always asked about my bf.
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>>17448453
did you pay for your own meal?
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>>17448464
It was his birthday, i was gonna pay for his.
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>>17448453

There's no such thing as "just friends" between a guy and a girl IN MEN'S EYES. We all see attractive women as a potential mate whether in a relationship or not. Your boyfriend knows that and the guy you went to get food with knows it too. I can understand why you're confused, but that's just how it be.

Don't listen to the people saying dump him. If we dropped every relationship at the drop of the hat and never tried to work through things, relationships would never work out.

Go tell him you weren't aware of how he felt and that you had the best of intentions. Other than that, give him time.
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How long have you been dating your bf?

If it's every early into the relationship he's an controlling asshole that's damaged beyond repair. Bounce because it will only get worse.

If you been in the relationship awhile and this came out of nowhere then he might be projecting on you for what he has done.

Either way I'd bounce.
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>>17448479
>was

So he paid for your meal, on his birthday.
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>>17448481
My bf is upset that i'm not proving loyalty but i don't know what more i can do!
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>>17448453
yeah but that doesn't mean he doesn't see you as a potential partner and think its was an opportunity to get into you. going for a meal is a weird thing to do with a girl as just friends. unless you are best friends that have known eachother for years, this is definitely dodgy, and its the fact he has just broke up with his gf.

guys are normally only friends with girls unless they want to get into them or if they are part of their friends group and they dont have much of a choice.

i think some girls are cool but i will always prefer male company and its the same with every single guy i know. i dont know any guy that would just do something with a girl as friends unless they are trying something on. your bf clearly know this and that is why he is hurt. i dont know how girls are oblivious to this.
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It seems like we're not getting the full story here. Why did he accuse you of cheating on him in the first place?
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>>17448504
hahaa, we believe what we're told at face value!
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>>17448520
He said he was given an anonymous tip but wouldn't give a name of the original accuser or the person i was allegedly cheating with. The original accuser kept saying 'it's not my place to name names' and couldn't give any proof.
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Here's the thing, to someone who thinks you're cheating, you can NEVER truly convince them you're not. Any amount of evidence you show them will only make them think they haven't found the "smoking gun" yet. He'll just think you're hiding something else, just slightly deeper than he's looking.

So he'll ask to see more. And more. And more. And it'll never be enough, but God help you if he finds anything that he could be construed as cheating.
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>>17448520
This.
He is projecting.
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>>17448451
I have female friends who take me out to dinner when I go through a breakup. It's actually not outlandish, at all. It's just nice to hear someone tell me I'm not a piece of shit.
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>>17448433
Couple things.
1) your boyfriend is a control freak. He obviously had no reason to believe you were cheating and just needed an in to read your personal communications. He's giving you zero personal space. This is only going to get wrose.

2) this friend of yours is looking to dick. If I was you I'd let him get up in my guts to spite your current boyfriend.

3) the only abusive boyfriend I have ever had started with the same tacticsof control. I'm not saying he's going to slap you around, but it should be a red flag.
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):
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>>17448449
Well if she's purposefully excluding him all the time, that would be a bit of a dick move. But sure its her time not his.

Not saying you are OP.
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>>17448545
>2)
That's really bad advice, especially if your worried about '3)'.

Its also a pretty horrible way to use the friend.
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>>17448438
This.
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>>17448481
>There's no such thing as "just friends" between a guy and a girl IN MEN'S EYES

Yes there is you fucking autist.
Thread posts: 24
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