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My girlfriend is depressed and I keep thinking it's my fault,

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My girlfriend is depressed and I keep thinking it's my fault, but she tells me it's not. It's having a bad effect on our relationship though. She's really distant lately, doesn't tell me anything about how she feels and we argue often about me not cleaning her room when I'm at her place in the weekend or things like that.

What can I do to get the relationship back on track?
>>
Have open discussions about stuff. And knock it off with trying to say it's your fault. That is not true and is just going to come across as you trying to make her depression about you.

Try to just be empathetic and listen to her. Don't try to offer solutions unless she is asking you for advice. Just be there for her emotionally and support her.
>>
Don't force her to try and talk about it. Tell her you're there when she's ready to talk about it and just be supportive.

I had a similar situation kill a relationship because I was selfish and stupid rather than being patient.
>>
>>17394482
>I keep thinking it's my fault
It is not your fault. Depression isn't a transmissible illness. It's like saying she got cancer because of you.
It's sad, it sucks, but it's no one's fault.

>What can I do to get the relationship back on track?
You get her to see a professional and get over her depression. It will take some time.
All you can do is be supportive and nice.

>we argue often
Stop being pissy about the way she feels.
You're probably sad, worried and you want her to be functioning. She's feeling like shit, and the fact that you criticise her (and every bad thing you say about her will sound like a very harsh critique) makes her feel worst and get her angry.
Accept that she's sick and it will take some time to feel better. Being pissy won't make her feel better or change shit.
You can talk to her and find a compromise - if she looks for professional help, you will stop doing x thing that bothers her.

>She's really distant lately
I got distant from my boyfriend when I was sick because he's a very judging person and I was afraid of opening up to him.
With time he learnt to be more kind and more understanding, and I learnt to be more comfortable with him.
>>
she is telling you something: start cleaning up your fucking mess in her room, you ignoramus.

another thing: her depression is about her, not you. why are you putting more pressure on her (saying it's your fault) when she's told you already it's not about you?

one more thing: start actively listening to her and changing what's in your control, like cleaning up after yourself.
>>
>>17394482
My girlfriend is depressed, legit with a diagnosis and everything. Best advice I can give is to be patient and caring, dont argue with her, don't criticize her, dont do anything like that. If she's really depressed she just needs you to be there for her. My girlfriend is all over me nowadays because I was and am always there for her when she got / gets down. It can pay off.
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