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GF and anxiety

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Thread replies: 11
Thread images: 1

My girlfriend has the worst anxiety of any human being I have ever encountered. Talking to me on the phone makes her cry, she cannot go outside for extended periods, and she skipped graduation because she had a panic attack so bad she stopped breathing. I am not asking for some kind of magical fix for her condition, I do not consider her some kind of puzzle to solve. I was just wondering if anyone who has had severe anxiety can help me understand what she's going through and what if anything I can do to help her feel happy? Her goal is to move in with me but that requires a plane trip.

How can I as her boyfriend, not a therapist, aid her in her quest? Yes, she is getting medication and therapy. In short if you had extreme anxiety, and I was dating you, what could I do to help? She has trouble expressing her needs and she's napping right now so I thought I would ask you guys.
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>>17388913
I would need my partner to be patient with me. I would need them to know that it wasn't them, but it was me, and to trust me when I say that. Lastly, even if I wasn't saying much at the time I would need for them to really listen when I talk.

Do you find that being around her causes her anxiety?
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>>17388932
>Do you find that being around her causes her anxiety?
Every time I called her she started crying out of feelings of inadequacy so probably.
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My only question is: why the fuck did you get together with this human wreck? Honestly, what's the point of a relationship if one side cannot take care of herself in terms of mental health? How is she supposed to support you, or take care of your hypotetical future children? She sounds like she's not fit to work either. Calling you stresses her so much and yet she got into a relationship with you before getting her head sorted out, and you followed the pussy and now you're sticking it in crazy - good luck with your future together.

Now some advice - if I were you (or her, really) I'd break up and wait till meds or theraphy starts working. It sounds like your gf has a lot on her plate right now and she's not ready for a relationship (even if she deludes herself into thinking she is). It looks like this relationship could even stunt her progress with anxiety, so yeah.
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>>17388946
How did the two of you get together?
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>>17388954

As someone who has social anxiety and is in a long-term relationship (bout 7 years now)... yeah. This.

Dick way to say it? Probably. But fuck it if I need a kick in the cunt and get my headspace sorted out before I can even think of being a partner to someone (let alone GOOD partner).

Thanks for saying it brother.
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>>17388954
This is my first relationship so I don't really know what I'm doing.
>It sounds like your gf has a lot on her plate right now and she's not ready for a relationship (even if she deludes herself into thinking she is).
That's not something I considered before, I will investigate this as best I can. She says that I make her feel so good and that she's making progress because of me. I have in fact noticed some advances, she was worse a few months ago believe it or not.
>>17388955
Hooo boy that's a story right there.
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>>17388954
I'm with this dude. Mentally unstable people have no business dating, they need to get their own fucking shit together. You need to leave, if only for her own good.
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>>17388972
i dont really have anything to add but i would like to hear the story if you wouldnt mind sharing it
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>>17388913
I think it's very courageous and sweet of you to stick by the one you love. Because that's what love is. We all fall down sometimes, and it's wonderful to have someone beside you to help you back on your feet--in this case your gf just falls down a lot.

What you should do. Treat your girlfriend like a child whose doing everything for the first time. Take her outside, hold her as you walk, a simple half mile walk on the same path every day or as often as you can. Don't let her turn back, assure her that everything is alright, distract her with conversation or pokemongo or something, wipe her tears, squeeze her, be her shield when she's overwhelmed, pick her up and carry her if you have to. Then she becomes comfortable with that route. Switch routes, repeat. Walk farther. Repeat. Eventually the delusion will clear and she'll be comfortable enough to be outside. Handle all her other fears the same way. Repetition is key. But above all, be her rock, when she's overwhelmed wrap yourself around her be her curtain from everything she fears
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>>17388983
Her sister called me and said my now-gf had a massive crush on me and we should go out. I talked to muh waifu, she admitted to thinking about me all day and crushing on me, I admitted I did too, we got together.

It's a story in itself because if either of us wanted to break things off it would cause family drama as well. One of the things I'm going to ask when she gets up is if her family pressured her to do this. If so then we're taking a break.
Thread posts: 11
Thread images: 1


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