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Lost my job, about to lose my home, I am about to take my life

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Thread replies: 60
Thread images: 9

Hi everyone landed myself in a really bad position. the short of it is that I lost my job and have no money to pay rent with. I also have begun worsening my emotional problems despite being on medication. I used to play video games with friends, I went clubbing and drinking with people I met locally. now I feel nothing I don't react to going hungry and have done very little to save myself, now I need 500 in a week's time or I will be evicted. money is going to change my situation, and I have enough sorry's to last a lifetime. I ask if there is anything left the world can say, any last chance solution to my problem or am I going to die before I get evicted? thank you for your consideration and comments
I'm sorry to hear that OP.
Let me start by sharing my own little river of cries
>been registered homeless for 4 years
>business in fine art
>sleeping at my business venue most nights last 3,5 years
>my business has no revenue
>owe several years of rent

Plenty to see yet OP. It's not over. You can take a couple of rough years for the sake of telling your grandchildren a better story. Just be creative.
>I used to play video games with friends, I went clubbing and drinking with people I met locally


do you have parents or anything? killing yourself is not the solution to getting evicted, my friend. Unless there is more you are not telling us about.

what's your business anyways? Are you a starving artist?
>a little high, so forgot I wasn't finished.

>finally evicted
>lost my part-time job
>been on sickleave from beginning of March until end of June
>still believe I can make it somehow
>never once considered ending my life before I've salvaged my dignity
Exactly that.

>No revenue
Not entirely true. I sometimes give private tutorials, and in recent years I've sold between 0 and 8 paintings. Not enough, and my landlord used to have faith in me. Sort of like a patron, but he wants his money.

post some art

start a patreon, pander to reddit-faggots

Does it make you mad that shitstains like Akabur are making 10k a month for literally doing nothing?
I was left by my mom when I turned 16 (she took my little sister and left for the Dominican cause she thinks she's going to have a better life there) and instead of going to Foster cause I thought that wasn't the correct path I asked for student welfare to finish high school I lost my job 3 weeks ago and all I am getting from EI is 51 dollars a week cause i haven't worked very long at many of my jobs. there is always a perfect reason I couldn't keep working there, I've been fired at places that i did amazingly at and have been asked to stay at jobs that were killing me physically. when I wasn't in a good spot I got welfare. but I haven't gone there now in the last three weeks because I don't see a point to just feeding myself and taking more of the gov't money. especially if I don't have a plan to fix my situation anymore.
I am not a very fast typer and I am kind of new to the site as well. So I apologize if it seems like I don't reply right away.
>post work

Hm. Possibly a good idea. Mostly been looking at galleries that suit to represent me, but will look into it. Don't see the point in reddit though.

Who? I work in oil on painting board and linen canvas.
And no, I'm pretty zen about it. Nobody else to blame but myself.
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> 500
> 7 days
Give 1 blowjob / night. Charge $80 to swallow. Rent made + $60 eating money.
Don't type anything in the 'name' field, it's frown upon.
Click the number at the end of the info line to link to the posts you're referring to.

I don't care how fast you reply, it's your thread, dude. Don't be sorry.
that's more useful than trying to identify myself. thanks.
>Don't see the point in reddit though
>I don't see the point in getting my name out there and building a fan base.

Maybe there's a reason you don't sell any artwork, famalam

just draw a picture of mickey mouse or something

you're a painter that's pretty cool. bet you get mad pussy


so you're basically saying you can find work? So that's not the reason you're considering suicide then. It seems like you're just down in the dumps for some reason. Is it a girl? Is it yourself? Is it medication? What is it, man.
I get that in all honestly thats a business model some people approach but I don't have that ability and I don't think I could pull it off even If it didn't horrify me.
Not in one week, and I lost my last job because I couldn't work night shifts because of the medication I was taking, they couldn't accommodate me and that's fine I guess but I couldn't get hired before the end of the month.

First solution here


Here's what you do.

Give customers an address.

When they knock, tell them it's unlocked. You are hiding behind a gloryhole, however, with a gun or knife or baseball bat for personal defense. Make sure you're set up so that they can't enter the rest of your house, and that they can only see a wall with a hole.

Ask them for money.

Tell them to wear a condom, or produce records indicating that they are clean.

Once they stick their money through the hole, ask them to stick their cock through it.

Wear lipstick and panties and get it off to it.

well, that made me horny typing that.
I'm not pissed about you using the social services I pay taxes for, that's why they're there. I'd be pissed if you didn't use them. Every dollar you get is a dollar the government can't spend on bombs and shit.
So yeah suicide looks better every minute gentleman idk what else to say.

I'd suck 10,000 AIDS-infested cocks over suicide, and not just because I'm a faggot.

Your life is young, you have much fruit to taste. Even being homeless for a while is small in the big scheme of things.
Can you imagine how humiliating and degrading that would be? I just imagined you, fucked up lipstick kiss marks around a hole in a piece of plywood on your knees, with a blonde curly wig and tears streaming down your face, holding a baseball bat in one hand, and rubbing your cock through a pair of thrift shop panties with holes in the lace. Jesus your life. Are you at least white?
I guess more info on this, My father has recently disclosed his displeasure in me losing my last job and how I will "run to OW and just lap up the easy money" this is probably the most painful betrayal I have ever felt since my mom left 7 years ago. I don't want that, idk my brain says he would hate me more if i was dead but I hate myself more than anyone else I know and doing "that" or returning to OW really makes puke.
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I haven't complained about not selling work, I've used it to explain the reason why I'm in a ton of shit. There's a difference. I haven't really tried that much.

As an artist I'm aware of conventional ways artists sell their work. Most people who understand and have an interest in painting, prefer to see the work in the flesh. I'm not an illustrator. Paintings aren't just images. They got a fundamental three-dimensionality to them, so galleries and exhibitions are modus operandi. Although I haven't made much off it in the last years, I've been selling my work for the last 14 years.

I did however agree that it was an interesting possibility. I've never really been on reddit. Perhaps you're right, but I'd imagine reddit and it's taste in art is somewhat of a tumblrish character, but who knows what people like...

Pic related. I can understand how a lot of people wouldn't like it, but it should be seen in the context of a walls.

Btw OP, I don't mean to hijack your thread.
no I'm Hispanic and Italian
Unless he's volunteering to pay your bills, fuck his opinions. At least you're not dead or a faggot sucking cock.
I don't care if it breaks up the posts about dick sucking bloody hell.
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Oh fuck.
thanks for the sentiment.
Okay that made me laugh.

Shit, that didn't rotate right. Should be 90 degrees clockwise. Looked fine on my phone. Guess it doesn't matter.
I had to come up with $950 rent, OP and here's how I did it.

>be student
>piss away rent during summer
>shit self after realization
>6 weeks before scholarships hit bank
>apply for credit card
>have the card rushed for a fee
>signup for squareup
>charge credit card $950+fees
>money hit bank
>went to bank and got a check
>paid rent, and $28 monthly CC fee.
>used the balance on hookers and blow

You're welcome.
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I like the part that's blue. You should make a whole painting of that type of shit.
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Close enough?
I am not in school and I have been paying back osap as much as i could but I am broke now and with no job nobody wants to give me a credit card. at least not MY banks
Just a solution. Plenty of other banks to offer them up. You could literally go to creditkarma and get 5 cards right now, with shitty credit.

Alas, still only a solution to buy time and that's what you're up against.

sounds like your Dad is the real reason why you want to neck yourself.

If you weren't on bad terms with him, i'm sure you wouldn't be making this thread in the first place.
My line of thinking is I buy more time or i get a lifeline from the government, what do I do after? I am gonna fuck it up again whether its my fault or its beyond my control its going to happen like its been happening this whole time and I'm really tired of this cycle.
Idk can i really hate the one person who has been right this whole time and has helped when he could? yeah hes definitely contributing to my problem but he helps alleviate it as well. I am honestly more against my self.
Yeah like that. Make those in different colors and patterns. That's a cool thing people will buy.
That's your dad telling you that you're going to fail, you don't know that's true. You've been called a failure for so long the only thing you know how to do is fail. You could take a 99% success and call it a failure because of that last 1%. You've got to get some self confidence, identify your strengths and maximize them, holy shit. Start now.
>I am gonna fuck it up again
This line of thinking is one of your biggest problem. You need to stop this shit and replace it with more affirmative thinking. You're not out of options just because 7 posters on a human pokemon webzone aren't coming up with the right answers yet.
Just let it all go and start working in the relationship (or lack thereof) you want to have in the future. Him being right all along doesn't matter now, what matters is how you start over.
I know its got to stop that's what everyone says to me but its not like this is new problem the amount of failure is just high i cant see past the shit. I'm just interpreting the data. and how my body feels.
Hey OP,
this is a practical thing if your down on your housing luck, it takes a while to evict you after you stop paying rent so I don't think you're totally boned yet.

Looks bad on credit references and what not, but at this point thats pretty secondary.

But yeah I believe after you stop paying rent you probably have about 30 days, then if you respond within that period some more time etc. just to not you have a bit before the police come knocking and actually throw you out.

In the trenches with you brother.
Thanks. Based advice. It's not a type of painting I've done a lot of, but I know it's likeable, and the buyer really loves it. I got about $700 for it.
That's what letting go of things is for. When you let go, it allows you to see farther and more clearly.
I don't want that at all I have no attachment to this home and my point is the time I'm gaining the procrastination the bargaining just makes it hurt more. I don't want to feel like I'm grasping at straws anymore
how should I let go?
Have you tried googling that?

Some say mindfulness.
Some say artistic expression.
I tend to recommend this seminar video. Give it a viddi when you got an hour to either waste or change your life.

I'm watching
Good for you mate. I'll be back in about 8-10 hours
This isn't working.
Well then. Install the Breathe app and do a bit of meditation.

I'm not here to tell you what to think, but you would benefit from replacing the negativity and down-talking of yourself with something more productive and in line with what you wish to see more of in the future.
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>do 2 years of school
>work shit job I hate for those years
>make it through after many hours of anger and tears
>law passes that makes it so I can never work in that field due to physical condition I have
>have a breakdown and quit job
>go to ER because I'll off myself if I don't
>they do nothing and let me go
>find another job
>everything going good for a while, enjoy job, enjoy life
>medication and therapy helping me be normal
>got a medical bill for $2100 for a 3 hour ER stay Yesterday
>employer fires me today out of retaliation for reporting someone

I really want to end this. I'm so tired. I just want to sleep.
I hear you I feel awful since I have the ability to cover medical expenses like that, not that its stopped some doctors for charging me with some kind of fee as a fuck you for taking up their time.
Stop the negative self talk. Focus on success, not failure. If you focus on failure, you will fail.
You got this shit bro. This shit looks impossible but it isn't. It's just going to make you stronger.
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Its much easier said than done, I hope others realise I'm past the point of failing and looking on at why I should make any attempts at pro-longing my life
There is no points other than the ones to accept yourself. Look at me. Did you misread what I wrote in my first post? I've been homeless for 4 years, only sleeping in friend's couches, in beds belonging to women I've been fucking, and mostly in my studio.

Not many western people would deem that a life worth living for someone my age. But there's no fucking way I want to agree that ending it is my only solution. The world is much bigger than that, and people just need to be creative, work hard and believe that they can change things - even if all odds are against you, what you're looking at is merely the residual outcome of your past mistakes.

When is NOW there right time to make better choices in life? There's nothing stopping you from discovering new opportunity. Stop yourself from your pessimistic reaction to learning about your possibilities - the reaction you experience is something programmed in your subconscious, and it can be reprogrammed by new and better habits. Start small, but trust me, you're born with the same creative power as everybody else.
Thread posts: 60
Thread images: 9

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