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I have been in a relationship with the same girl for nearly four

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I have been in a relationship with the same girl for nearly four years now. We love each other very much and we have a great sex life, as well as long term plans.

The thing is, we were very young and both virgins when we started dating. I really want to fuck this hot black girl who began flirting with me yesterday, but my gf is flatly against any extra-relationship shenanigans for very valid reasons. Even a threesome is out of the question.

I want to fuck this black girl but I love my gf and I don't want to hurt her/break up/cause any tension.
What do? (pic unrelated)
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>>17320120
ur dumb.

dump gf and fug nig
or
stay with gf

not gonna tell you to cheat bro.
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>>17320120
>I love my gf
>I just want to fuck another girl
>halp
M8, you are not ready yet for a long term relationship, this happened today if you ignore it, then it will come back later and even more pressing. You might be married and with a kid then, if you are seriously considering destroying your relationship just for the sake of sexual experimentation with others, then end your relationship, it doesn't look like you are committed to it when it comes to accepting the fact that you are only going to have sex with the girl you first had sex with.
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You have to weigh up if your temporary instincts are worth sacrificing your long-term love.

I fantasise about previous girls, girls I'd like to get with, etc. but none of those with ever compete with the full package of my girl. It's natural, its instinctive, but cheating to act on it is not just or fair.

I wouldn't myself, but don't feel too guilty about it.
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>>17320120
You don't,

Holy crap your post is triggering me.
>>
You're trash. Are all guys like this?
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>>17320168
Well, he did not done it yet, did he? He just have an urge and don't know what to do with it. He now have choice of being mature adult or rabid dog in heat.

>>17320120
Don't do it. You will trade something special and good you have with your gf for something fast and ultimately not rewarding. Your brain is basically fighting with your balls. You can chose between being human or animal. Good day.
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>>17320187
Kinda. I mean we all lust after random girls, but only the idiots act on it.
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>>17320187
All guys will have thoughts, that's perfectly normal, you meet a cute girl and you end up clicking with them.
What isn't normal is acting on them feelings. It's very VERY easy to just not sleep with them, so anyone who does end up cheating on someone else are assholes, plain and simple.
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>>17320144
I phrased this wrong. I meant to ask how do I stop myself from wanting to fuck this random, or if it is possible.
>>17320168
I suppose, though you are making assumptions with very little information.
>>17320177
Very reasonable, she is an amazing girl and I barely know the other one so you raise a great point.
>>17320187
Thank you, random internet stranger. Who hurt you?
>>17320190
Just fapped, head feels clearer. We won't be seeing each other this week as we are both away from town so I guess its my love of sex kicking in. My gf just sent a (completely unwarranted) message telling me how much she loves as trusts me in spite of everything (long story short I have betrayed her trust a few times, though none of them involved infidelity) and this is making me feel very guilty. Thanks anon.
>>17320196
Agreed. I think it's normal to have the feelings but abnormal to act.
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>>17320238
>Who hurt you?

Nobody. You have to be hurt to have standards for decency and self-control now?
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>>17320196
>>17320224
I don't have those thoughts though. Is it impossible for guys to be that way too?
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>>17320120
Stop acting like a horndogs and just masturbate if your gf is not enough. Once you cheat you will definitely regret it
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>>17320120
Life isn't a romantic comedy. Fuck the black girl and be nice to your girl. If she never finds out, it will have literally zero effect on your relationship. Loving her doesn't mean you're suppose to suppress your desires, grow up.
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>>17320313
>Loving her doesn't mean you're suppose to suppress your desires, grow up.
A monogamous relationship does. If someone really feels that way they should seek out others who feel similarly, not trick someone into thinking they get the relationship they want then fuck them over behind their back.

Not like in this day and age it would be that hard to find someone who just wants a fling, or an open relationship, if you really set your mind to it.
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>>17320313
So what you're saying is you're a cuck who would be okay with your girlfriend taking other dicks as long as you didn't have to know.
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>>17320347
OP isn't tricking anyone. They've been together for four years, he's clearly serious about her and just wants to follow his desires for once. Use a condom, be discreet, and come back to your girl happy.

>>17320356
If you think that you not fucking around means that your girlfriend is not fucking around then you're a retard.
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>>17320378
>OP isn't tricking anyone.
He is, because they are in an exclusive relationship and he's not going to disclose to his girlfriend that he broke the conditions of their relationship. He doesn't (or well, wouldn't in this hypothetical scenario) give her the chance to re-evaluate whether she still wants to be with him knowing all the facts.
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>>17320378
>agreeing to be monogamous
>secretly not being monogamous
>not tricking anyone

Yeah no.

And so you basically believe there is no scenario where you won't be cheated on, so you've just accepted it. Truly internalized that cuck mentality.
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>>17320257
It is, unless they have mental issues. For men it's normal to want multiple women, but most have sufficient self-restraint to not cheat.
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>>17320384
We hide things all the time, whether you want to admit it or not. Everyone wears a mask, no one truly knows anyone else but themselves. Nothing you have ever done was purely altruistic.
Accept those things and act accordingly, do whatever makes you happy. The people around you and especially your SO expect you to.

If you decide that it's better for you to remain 100% honest and that's what's better for you in the long run so be it, but don't skip on life just to "do the right thing" or some other hypocritical bullshit like that.
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>>17320408
There's a difference between hiding embarrassing habits or unpleasant memories and hiding something that you know would very likely end the relationship if it came to light. That's the difference between privacy and self consciousness and actively keeping your partner from potentially leaving you over something you did.

>Nothing you have ever done was purely altruistic.
What does that have to do with anything? It's a far cry between doing something "purely altruistic" (and I never got that to begin with, it benefits people if we are helpful to each other so we are programmed to be happy if we can help someone, how is that side effect particularly selfish?) and making the choice to not only go against your partner's explicit expectations of you to be faithful, but to also hide that so that they don't get to decide they're done with you.

There's nothing hypocritical about wanting to do the right thing. That you don't succeed 100% is besides the point. It's not about being a perfect human being but about holding yourself to standards and wanting to be able to look yourself in the eye in the mirror. And you might be able to live with your partner potentially cheating on you, for many people that is a deep betrayal and in that case wanting to do it yourself anyway is pretty fucking hypocritical.
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>>17320408
>hypocritical bullshit
>"just have fun, bro"
It's about standards, you low-life fuck. I'm not going to lower myself to that level by being such a petty piece of shit that I lie to my partner about shagging some nigger slut, and OP shouldn't either, though it's not like he was planning on doing it. No wonder you always end up with women that cheat on you.
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Look man, we are guys, we instinctively desire to fuck every chick we find desirable, and it's fine. What separetes us from the rest of the animals in this fucked up planet is reason, reflection, conscience.
You have a way to supress those feelings, it's not that hard, just don't sleep with her. Fap thinking about her, but don't cheat. Would you like to get cheated on?
You seem to have a fine chick with you, is the nignog worth it? This won't bethe last chick you will want to fuck, that's when your reason overcomes your instincts. Sex is just a physical act, wait for your girl.
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>>17320424
Look, I get what you're saying, I would be devastated if I found out my SO cheated, and you definitely shouldn't cheat either if you feel that it will make you regret it.

But, I think that the picture perfect monogamy sales pitch where two people fall in love and it has to somehow last for ever and ever, never skipping a beat, without any side ever finding comfort and insight in someone else's arms is just not real, at least not for me.

I cheated on my girl, when I was abroad, I met a girl that was pure fun and the few days I spent with her taught me more than a year with my SO. I had a long thing with a girl from school, she was amazing, I made so many memories and learned a lot about who I am and what I want from my life. But in the end, neither of them was as good for me as my girlfriend, yet they allowed me to grow and become a better, more rounded person, which is better for both me and my SO.
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>>17320494
Disgusting.
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>>17320494
I don't think that this never skipping a beat monogamy is realistic for many people, but I do think for most people the way that it works is that they pass up on many opportunities, and when they eventually cheat it's a combination of factors (like their high school sweetheart they always kept a soft spot for, as opposed to a random woman, combined with a rough spot in the relationship, or generally a lot of stress in life) that make them eventually cave. Not that most people look at the long term prospects, go "huh, guess I'm never going to make that, might as well fuck what I can get".

I don't believe that stepping out of the relationship can never serve a certain purpose but that doesn't change that you are violating a very intimate kind of trust between the two of you. I mean, I'm sure that every person would be happier if every single day that their SO wasn't feeling it they could hop on another hot willing body, and mentally more well rounded if they could develop every single crush into a passionate all-consuming infatuation with constant heart to hearts. But monogamy in its essence means that you are choosing that special bond that you have with one person over the plentifulness of the rest of the world. It means not grabbing chances that would've been fruitful, for the sake of investing in and protecting that bond. And no that doesn't always go flawlessly by a long shot, but then we get back to my first point. And if you really feel that it is more important to be open to all those people and possibilities, then that's the time to choose an open relationship over a monogamous one.
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>>17320494
No one said that faggotry would be real. you just need self control, you can die without cheating, you know? We will alaways like someone else or click with someone else better than with the SO, because we evolve and because deep down we hate routine, but in the end we can always look back and say it's not wroth it. Who's to say it will be so good? it's the heat of the moment, No one ever not desire someone else, because we have an ideal of the perfect one in our heads, and there will always be one who comes closer because we're not lucky enough to meet the actual dream, becauseit doesn't exist. Learn what? what does that even mean? Sex made you smarter? You can always be friends with these people and have self control over not sticking your johnson inside them. No one said relationships are a bed of roses, but at th end of the day if you can seek comfort and peace in that person, and you can see a future with them, why risk it?
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>>17320523
You make valid points anon.

>>17320529
> No one said that faggotry would be real. you just need self control, you can die without cheating, you know?
Of course you can control it, we are discussing on whether or not you should.
Yeah, the perfect woman doesn't exist, that's exactly my point.

> Sex made you smarter?
Being intimate with someone is different to being their friend you retard.

> why risk it?
I'm not risking anything.
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>>17320616
>whether or not you should
Ok, then you should, in the long run, it's o good for anyone, you'll feel guilty at some point, or might end up hooking up with nignog again and again until gf finds out.
>Being intimate with someone is different to being their friend
Ok, I get this, a perfectly valid point, but a milestone I think, of a relationship with someone is that! the fact of being able to be completely, or almost completely open about yourself to them without feeling judged, anything past that, you can discuss in this kind of boards. If you don't feel challenged by your partner, if this bothers you that much, if you really can't find what you need in your girl, you will resent it, and in the long run, it will get you problems, might lead you to cheating further in the relationship.
>I'm not risking anything
You seem pretty confident about that, I do hope it doesn't come back and bite your ass
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>>17320120
Make sure the black girl lives in area that your gf doesnt frequent. Be upfront with the black girl. Make sure she knows that she is the mistress.

Fuck her, use a condom, do it in a far away location.

Literally smart men have been getting away with cheating since the beginning of time. Monogamy is a meme, and a failing meme at that.

Ive cheated on my ex before and the rest of the anons are right. You arent ready for a long term relationship. Temptation will always be a problem, but it shouldnt be this easy for you to be swayed.

Also once the deed is done, forget it ever happened. IDGAF if you have to hypnotize yourself.
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>>17320120
>I really want to fuck this hot black girl
BWAAAAAAHHAHAAHAHAHHAAHAAAA

Holy shit OP it's usually the complee opposite problem for me

Why in fucking hell do you want to fuck a BLack? Does she have like curves or something? You realize they come with that face right no matter how "thick" she is.
Thread posts: 32
Thread images: 1


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