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I conditioned myself to believe girls won't ever like me

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I conditioned myself to believe girls won't ever like me when I was a loser in high school. Now I'm better looking, but this idea is still hardwired in my head, so I've never had a gf at age 24.
>always wonder whether girls like me or not
>always sperg out in front of them
>train myself to think that they're always just being friendly
>they're just being friendly
>no girl in this world will ever like you
>they're just being friendly
>forced this idea into my head since high school
>stopped sperging out when talking to girls because I realize there's no chance they'll ever like me anyways
>years later have gotten fit and better looking
>can never tell whether a girl is being flirty because my mind just jumps to the conclusion that they're being friendly and aren't attracted to me
>even if a girl shows strong signs I just tell myself "she's just being friendly, she's like this with all her guy friends, she doesn't like you"
>realize years of telling myself this fucked my thinking up
>realize I'll never get a girlfriend, I'll never form a relationship
>mfw
>>
I know that feel. If it makes you feel any better relationships are a massive waste of time.
>>
>>17164624

>I'll never get a girlfriend
>because i choose not to

stop acting like life dealt you this really tragic hand. you choose not to pursue girls
>>
I lost my virginity at 20.
I'm by no means a chad cassanova pua master but, once I heard a pua lecture that at least had a 1/3 of truth to it.

To paraphrase "They always say 'jus' b urself' but, that's not good enough, what is the self anyway. not going to get into some psychological or philosophical bullshit here but, rather I'm here to tell you that you need to be a better version of yourself and project that onto others. Know that you'd slightly above average in something? Fuck it tell him you're above average at it. Be the person that they want to see in you. At some point they'll believe it and if you believe it hard enough it will be you"

**disclaimer** I did this, Oh sure I got rejected, stood up and failed at it, but, at least twice in my life. I fooled her and got into a relationship for some small amount of time I had a gf, sex and a sense of self worth. Of course when the jig is up it's humiliating but, whatever you got laid and you got to be someone better then yourself for a bit. Gradually force yourself into improvement and you might be surprised.
>>
>>17164635
Did you even read what OP wrote? It's him not choosing to do that, it's his head telling him that he's not good enough for anyone. You might say that "Just go hit on women" but it's not really as simple as that.
>>
>>17164624
You need to think the opposite to succeed actually. You need to increase your self-confidence and think that girls always like you instead of saying the opposite to yourself.

Try improving yourself. Find out your weaknesses, and also what makes you more self confident etc.

Girls like confident men, not broken pussies.
>>
>>17164647

>its not him choosing to do this
>its his brain
>which is technically him
>so he is deciding

its not as simple as 'just hit on a girl'. but hes literally choosing not to. he could say 'i realize this is my problem so i need to make an attempt'

girls are not robots who will self destruct if you make the wrong move. worst case scenario, a girl says shes not interested. to say

>ILL NEVER GET A GIRLFRIEND CUZ I DONT BOTHER TRYING

is silly
>>
I used to be exactly like you before. If theres one thing that never works with girls is passivity. You probably overthink everything so much that you end up never giving any signs to anyone and they probably give up.

Everyone has crushes on everyone at some point. Dont think youre the only person on earth that has litterally no hope sparking interest in anyone ever. I bet you that if you could read everyones minds youd notice how many girls actually looked at you in your life and be extremely surprised.
>>
OP here.
Also I feel extremely uncomfortable whenever a girl touches me in any way. Today one of the girls in my class leaned her head on my shoulder. Again. She's done it several times.
Now I want to ask her out, she's really cute and funny, she's a year older than me.
But my mind tells me
>"She's just being friendly. She doesn't like you. She only needs you to help her with class work. She's very outgoing, that's why she leans her head on your shoulder. Don't ask her out, don't be the little bitch who gets feelings for his female friends. Just ignore it and forget about it"
I'm fucked up.
>>
>>17164660
Next time she does that, rest your head on her head.
>>
>>17164624
Kinda same with me. Girl is into you, you don't think it's possible, later maybe you find out she was but now it's too late, feel sad. I call this anime main character disorder.

I've read somewhere that in PUA "philosophy" they tell you to always assume everyone is attracted to you, no matter what. Flawed, but it might work. I am trying this out myself currently because I'm an idiot who doesn't know any better.
>>
>>17164651
>>17164804
I said the second thing, and saw what you said. It is tough to do, but in my experience it works with thinking everyone is attracted to you, even dudes though to your personality and in a friendly way. When I think like that, I manage to talk to pure strangers comfortably. Any extra tips on this for me and OP btw?
>>
Nobody is going to be angry at you for being attracted to them. If they aren't interested, you'll have a brief, awkward moment, and then you'll both move on.

Don't be so afraid of being uncomfortable. Being rejected isn't fun, but it isn't fatal; you'll bounce back.
>>
>>17164624
part of being a man is being able to tell if shes flirting or being nice. more often than not shes just being nice. deal with it.
Thread posts: 14
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