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How do I get this guy to ask me out? >19 >totally romantically

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How do I get this guy to ask me out?

>19
>totally romantically inexperienced
>work at coffee place
>not starbucks
>regular customer
>looks 25ish

>be still my heart <3

>talk a bit each day
>I'm super warm & friendly
>he is really nice too
>everyday he gives me the cutest shy smile
>interactions are limited because busy store

This has been going on for about a year. Recently I saw him at a local sushi place but I pretended I didn't see him because I didn't know if he would want to talk to me outside work.

/adv/ how do I flirt? I'm really not the flirtatious type. This guy is so kind and sometimes he comes into my work with his mum, and he is just adorable.
>>
Ask him yourself, silly.
>>
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>tfw no cute coffee shop girl ever thinks of me this way
>>
>>17163023
I've totally thought about this, but I guess I'm traditional?

What would I say? I don't even know where we would go!
>>
>>17163024

Aim higher anon! Maybe a cute doctor or a cute investment banker!
>>
>>17163028
Write your name and number on his cup the next time he orders coffee. He'll get the hint.
>>
>>17163033
That is so forward! What if that scares him away? What if he has a girlfriend?
>>
>>17163028
>walk up to him
>ask him if he wants to go on a date to a place or event with you\
>exchange phone numbers

it's foolproof
get drunk first if you have to
>>
you should start by showing that you take notice of him, know his name and usual order, say hello and small talk when you pass by.
>>
>>17163038
either sabotage their relationship so they break up and he is all yours or be sad for 10 or so business days or so and pick yourself back up
>>
>>17163041
anon I can't get drunk on the job! How would I phrase that though?

>hey, would you want to ever go out somewhere not here, like at a different time?

>>17163042
I do! We're now at the point where I just make his order. And we know eachother's names. His name is Dan. Everyday I ask how he is, but he's so shy! We like the same hockey team so we usually talk about that.
>>
>>17163049
Whoa anon. This is some gossip girl style stuff.

If I can't even get myself into a relationship, how do you expect me to be able to sabotage one!?
>>
>>17163030
>Aim higher anon! Maybe a cute doctor or a cute investment banker!
>tfw no cute anything thinks of me this way
>>
>>17163061
Awww. I think you're cute anon.
>>
>>17163056
only step left is for you to ask him out.
>>
>>17163074
How would I phrase it though? Is there any way I can make it clear that I want HIM to ask me out?
>>
>>17163080
"Hey, you ever hang out anywhere else around here?"
The rest is history
>>
I would go along the way here and say ask him out yourself, but there may be other ways

ask him for his number at least, get to know him a little better, while at the same time letting him get to know you better

if this goes on to long again i would say ask him yourself, or maybe distance yourself from him to let him try himself
>>
>>17163085
Okay! That sounds pretty casual. I will try this out tomorrow morning! I might post a new thread, but if not, please assume that he confessed his love for me. Thanks anon!
>>
>>17163080
Asking him out is way better, but if you insist on pushing him to ask....
>Oh man I really wish I had someone to go with to x event
>You got any plans for this weekend?
>It's always nice to see you again
>You're my favourite customer
>>
>>17163092
Can you ask someone for their number in a non-sexually-interested way though?

The goal of going out with him is that we would get to know eachother. Coffee or something.

How would distancing myself help? Wouldn't that discourage him?
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>>17163094
No problem! you seem super cute by the way you type. just wanna help a fellow femanon out
>>
>>17163033
This. It's not complicated.
>>
>>17163059
http://m.wikihow.com/Break-Up-a-Couple
>>
>>17163098
>>Oh man I really wish I had someone to go with to x event

Isn't that a bit needy though?

>>You got any plans for this weekend?

I've asked him this before and he has mentioned he works on the weekends and that pretty much shuts down any future conversation. I think he works with computers or something.

>>It's always nice to see you again

This is cute. I will keep this one in mind.

>>You're my favourite customer

favourite customer... and human being.

Thanks anon!
>>
>>17163102

Thanks girly! You're too kind!

>>17163104

Yikes... not really my style! Have you ever attempted this?
>>
>Want to start a relationship with a hopelessly shy guy.
>Want said guy to ask you out.
Pick one Anon, if this guy is so reserved and demure, don't expect him to magically come out of his shell and try to woo you.

Just go ahead to him, tell him you'd like to hang out with him after work, no need to find an excuse or a surreptitious way to express interest, just go ahead and tell him you'd like to hang out after work... it's that simple.

If he's scared away, or is in a relationship already, then it was just not meant to be, I'm sure other guys will ask you out later.
>>
>>17163101
asking for his number can just be anything casual ranging from "hey (I believe his name is Dan) can you give me your number" , or just "hey, i have fun talking to you, would you give me your number" anything ranging in this, will give more examples if needed.

As far as getting to know someone better in the age of technology, people have become less interactive, thus just texting and getting to know one another to a point, and then going out to talk some more, say the coffee shop, or wherever

as for distancing yourself this can go one of two ways - the good way, which is if you feel he is interested in you, where he realizes he wants to be with you the bad way: he was just a friend and was just confused as to why you were distancing yourself. This method is last result method
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>>17163125
sorry that broke up a little as i was typing

he realizes he wants to be with you - then the bad way is next
>>
>>17163124

> if this guy is so reserved and demure

When did I say that! He's just shy.

I guess you're right. I am kind of over-complicating things. I just really like him and I don't want to mess anything up!

Thanks for the advice.
>>
>>17163125
Don't play silly games like this anon, if you want a relationship based on mutual interest and affection, then just present yourself to him naturally, as you are.
However if you want a relationship that's based on careful manipulation tactics... you can try some of this stupid shit here.
>>
>>17163125

>hey, i have fun talking to you, would you give me your number

This seems like a natural way to ask! I like it, thanks anon!

> just texting and getting to know one another to a point, and then going out to talk some more

I am a horrible texter. I usually only text people to confirm plans, so maybe I could just ask him out over text?

And the distancing thing is SO not what I would typically do, but my current methods haven't been working out so well, so that could be a last resort?

>>17163136

I have to agree with you on this. I'm a super transparent person so these games don't really appeal to me.
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>>17163145
How can you be a bad texter if you seem so talkative in this thread? Thatll always be a mystery to me
>>
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>>17163153

This is anonymous, there's no recourse for anything I say and I don't really care what people think of me. Everything i'm typing will be gone in a day. Texting is different, especially if someone is basing a first impression off it. I'm also a bad texter because I don't have my phone on me often and I prefer to have irl communication.

Mystery solved. :)
>>
>>17163171
Just text to him like you were on 4chan, really, I'm a huge advocate of people being themselves if they want to find a healthy long term relationship based on sincere love.
Maybe don't text him like real life was /b/ , but enjoy being transparent and sincere.
You don't want a guy to like you just because you played your cards right, that's like being hired for a job you can't do just because you could get the interview right.
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>>17162995
OP I need your help!

I'm in the exact same situation, except I'm the guy in it hah. What signs do you give this guy to show you want him to ask you out? I'm crushing hard on my barista but all I do is what the guy you described does, I just give a shy smile and make some small talk. So he probably likes you too by that description. What signs should I look for from a shy barista girl?
Thread posts: 36
Thread images: 4


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