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Anonymous
ideas of polyamory clouding my decisions 2016-05-18 17:20:36 Post No. 17157845
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ideas of polyamory clouding my decisions 2016-05-18 17:20:36 Post No. 17157845
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So, I'm a 32yo man, and the relationship I got with my ex is making it difficult to meet someone I can build a long-term relationship with. Sorry for the wall of text, but I'd like to get it all out.
Basically I forced myself to become polyamorous so that I could justify still fucking my ex while seeing other women, because I basically felt like a cuck as my ex started sleeping with other men (we had already officially broken up, and were living in different countries, but were still seeing each other sexualy/romantically when we she was back home.) This started more than two years ago, but it's only in the past year that I've dated women over a longer periods, and only with one of them was I alternating between my ex and someone else.
Now, the most recent someone else is a woman that fell deeply in love with me, and she had her heart broken when she told me that she was worried we weren't exclusive, and I told her that I couldn't promise her anything, and didn't believe in monogamy. She said she actully agreed, but that she had too many feelings for me, and just couldn't cope with me dating other women. We dated for three months, and been in no contact for 7 weeks now. I saw her yesterday, and now I'm not sure whether I should've given monogamy a try. I suffered from oneities for most of my twenties, but I'm starting to think whether I'm fucking my future with any chance of proper relationships if I continue to insist that fucking someone else on the side should be allowed. The woman in question is wonderful, and I'm starting to think I want her back, but it could be that it's just been a while since I had sex. The exact same thing happened with the woman I dated for months last year. I know I was wrong in leading the woman in question on, and I feel like an asshole for not telling her earlier.
Go against my disbelief in monogamy, or forget about dating anyone who can't acknowlege that people naturally can have feelings for more than one person at a time?
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Stop being a cuck
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>>17157850
>still fucking my ex occasionally
>fuck other women in the same period
Last time I checked, my ex was the one being cucked.
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anyone?
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>>17157845
>I basically felt like a cuck as my ex started sleeping with other men (we had already officially broken up, and were living in different countries
You're an idiot.
>Basically I forced myself to become polyamorous so that I could justify still fucking my ex while seeing other women
>I told her that I couldn't promise her anything, and didn't believe in monogamy.
No, you do believe in monogamy, you're just using polyamory as an excuse to be an asshole. Make up your mind.
Also, stop saying "cuck". Cuck is a 4chan meme and memes aren't real life. Fucking stop. Unless one of you is watching your partner have sex with another person no one is being cucked.
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>>17158191
Thank fucking God somebody said it. Fucking misuse of the word cuck is just makes you look like a pleb because someone doesn't have the basic grasp of what a cuckold is.
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>>17158191
>No, you do believe in monogamy
>Make up your mind.
I'm trying to. The numbers are against monogamy, though. People break up, people get divorced. People cheat, whether or not the other person knows. People have open relationships. People are swingers. None of these are monogamous, and the whatever 16 remaining percentage are usually either boring, miserable and in general less sexual, possibly very religious. I used to think of monogmy as this holy ultimate thing. I don't anymore, and I think it's better to just acknowledge this, so that it becomes less of a dissaster if someone happens to meet someone they feel drawn to in a sexul way - which is highly probable in a world with that many millions of attractive people of the prefered gender. I went through so many years of my life, ignoring the fact, and it made me less of a man. Now I got a healthy outlook on my chances to get with women, so why should I agree to stick with one entirely, just because she's the one I'd like to spend most of my time with?
>You're an idiot.
>Unless one of you is watching your partner have sex with another person no one is being cucked.
Fair enough. At the time it felt like she was leading me on, since she told me she loved me, and said that it felt like we were becomming BF/GF again (it was 7-8 months since our breakup,) but soon after she slept with someone. At the time I didn't want to stop seeing her, but felt that the only way to justify it would be to have an open agreement, so that there wouldnt' be any cheating, since we weren't officially a couple. She still says she loves me, but we both know we're not going to stay calibate each time she's abroad - and she travels a lot, for months at a time.
Just give me a better reason, please famy
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>>17158237
OP here, and slow your horses. I know what cuckoldry is, and I'm merkelig adopting the general vocabulary of this place, no biggie. Tbqh it's quite worse when people come out and ask if they've become a cuck for losing their job or whatnot.
Btw, the definition the other anon goes by isn't really accurate. Pic related.
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>>17158319
>merkelig
merely*
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