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i'm really scared my bf is gonna break up with me. Idk what

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i'm really scared my bf is gonna break up with me. Idk what to do.

it was our 1 yr anniversary yesterday nd the night before he texted me saying he felt bad about us. he said it was because he feel like I cheated on him.

his phone was gonna die so I asked to go over that night even though I was exhausted & trying to prepare for the next day. he wouldn't talk to me when I went over, and acted like I did something wrong. wat happened five months ago, was that I found some shit and felt betrayed, I broke up with him and never thought I would see him again. he is my first real long term relationship, im 24, and I lost my virginity to him when I just turned 23 a year ago. so I was having a meltdown, I called him a guy I knew who liked me, we hung out and I ended up kissing him. three days later, I realized I couldn't live w/0 my boyfriend and we worked things out and I told him what happened. he was really upset but he forgave me and now 5 months later hes saying he never actually got over it.

I felt like he was just trying to find a way out of the relationship since it happened 5 months ago, but he said it was bc it was our anniversary, and he felt it wasn't a year together and if it was then I cheated on him.

I know what happened was wrong, but im not going to get into all the details about why I felt like that, and that I didn't think id ever be with him again. im just scared hes going to brak up with me for it now. I also made him lose a friend that's a girl bc its his ex's twin sister. that's kinda why I brk eup with him because he was obsessed w/ tht group of friends, and I felt like it wasn't fair to me, especially bc I found out he considered dating her at some point. that's when I broke up with him.

what should I do? ive just become so attached to him, and im scared. ive had a really difficult life, im just really sad that i messed up.. what can i do? i just expect the worse now...
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>>16944660
he was acting more normal today. i didn't see him in person, but through text.

lately he has been yelling at me more, that's why i feel lke he might break up wih me and ive been expecting the worse. on our anniversary, he seemed really unhappy andi kept asking him why, he said he wasjust tired. then eventualy on the car ride home he snapped and screamed at me in a way that was scary.

he said he wouldn't let it affect us the night before after i finally got him to talk to me, but im scared it will lead to break up, and it feels like theres nothing i can do. he says he trusts me and he knows id never do anything, but he was hysterical crying, and i can sympathize bc i probably wouldn't wanna be with him if he kissed someone else in the one year time frame of us being together either. but idk. i just feel so awful. id just for once want this to work out between us....
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>>16944664
you both sound completely toxic.

even in your clearly edited version of these events, i can see how crazy and jealous you are.

and i can also see that he's the same way.

get one of your friends to kiss him or something. an eye for an eye. you guys sound just petty enough for something like that to work.
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>>16944672
i am pretty jealous over him, its true. im trying to not be like that anymore, you know?

i mean i wouldn't call how he feels about what happened jealousy. he probably feels betrayed. but i think hes overreacting because i broke up with him, i could have done a lot worse, most girls wouldn't tell him-part of me wishes i never told him...

and no that would never work ha. mybe he is jealous. idk. he seems mad/jealous when i was ordering my food from the waitor wen we went out to eat and stuff like that. maybe its just me but i feel like he was and does idk
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well coming from a dude that broke up with gf cause of how she treated him and ended up dating another girl for 6 months then going back to the ex cause i couldnt live without her. the feeling of betrayal and resentment fades very slowly and will always find a way to rear it head. just something you're going to have to deal with and constantly reassure him
not saying this is the best advice just whats working for me
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