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ITT: Ask The Opposite Gender Anything

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Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.

Avoid asking these common questions:

>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't. Our answers are not going to help you.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical act/moment that will instantly change you forever. It takes hard work, time, and effort.

>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.

>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely. Preferences differ.

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.

>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing

>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.

>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>

>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking.

>Brandon
Fuck off

Old Thread: >>16941267
>>
There is an event I'd like to ask someone to in two weeks. Should I just ask now, or wait until it's closer?

I feel like if I don't make contact I definitely won't be contacted either. I don't know if that matters, though.
>>
>>16944339

Errr... Why would you wait?

So they can have less time to prepare/more time to make other plans?
>>
>>16944344
Sorry, I should have given more info.

I asked to hang out recently and got a very generic "I'm busy" answer with no follow up. Just like I'm busy, let's hang later.

So I'm worried asking so soon might be weird? But I guess if it is that just means they aren't into me, which is information is like to know anyway.
>>
LADIES: I'm very socially awkward and there are some things I simply don't get, like flirting.

How do I flirt? How do I know if a girl is flirting with me?
>>
Douche alert:

How do I end my affair?
Me and my gf have had a lot of problems and have been on and off with each other because I have been businessing abroad. A girl took to my liking in the midst of our problems and we had a drunken night together. Now she won't let go even though she knows I have a relationship back home and that we can't be anything more than friends, but she keeps persisting by trying to steal a kiss, hugging and sitting on my lap etc.

I really need to end this as my one nighter has caused me a shower of guilt and remorse but we still work together and my affair is really into me. Please halp.
>>
>>16944365
How would ending the affair lessen your guilt? You still did it.

Break it off ("I'm married, this was a mistake") and then come clean.
>>
LADIES: I'm very socially awkward and there are some things I simply don't get, like flirting.

How do I flirt? How do I know if a girl is flirting with me?
>>
>>16944364
>>16944392
just fucking spam her like you do us.

But for real, you are some kind of autist so I wouldn't bet on the love game.

If you're still persistent: You'll know when you know. It doesn't take a genius (but autism doesn't help)
>>
Are petite blue eyed blonde women human? or are they some kind of demi-god race of angels?
>>
>>16944438
Maybe if you are a nazi.
>>
For anyone, really:
How do I know if I'm in love?
Needless background:
My ex was my best friend before we got together, and I was really sure I loved them. Took me awhile to get over them, until they texted me and I realized that they were ok and I was ok so it ended pretty...well? Now I feel like I'm hitting it off with this girl who I think I love but I think has a bf and I don't know how to ask her that without seeming like a creep or just stealing her phone. Ooh, another question! How do I ask someone if they have a so without looking creepy?
>>
I'd like answers from both, but preferably girls.
How do I know when a silence is uncomfortable? I'm fine being silent when I'm around my friends or a girl, but when it happens with girls I feel as if I should fill the silence because I don't want them to feel uncomfortable.
I used to talk to this one girl all the time and she specifically told me she hates it when people try to fill every silence and that she has no problem when our conversations would just stop and we'd just be doing whatever we were doing without the need to talk.
Problem here is that no other girl is that forward with their comfort with being quiet.
How the hell do a gauge their feelings on the subject without specifically asking since it's kind of a weird question?
>>
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>>16944444
>>
>date 19 y/o girl for 7 months
>doesn't feel comfortable introducing me to parents cause I'm 6 years older than her
>cause of our few fights
>this weekend told we need to take a break because she's tired of fighting and feels awful she isn't ready to have me meet her parents
>insists neither of us move on and she just needs time

So I'm pretty much a back up plan, right senpaitachi?

I'm really hurt and I could get a rebound literally in 1 phone call right now but I'm not sure if it's a good idea

what do
>>
>>16944325
I met a girl in a university club I had just recently joined, and we went on a date.

The date was really fun, but she got cold feet and froze up in the days following. Fair enough, she ain't interested in me. I am happy to move on.

The problem is that there's an elephant in the room when I see her at our club meetings every week. She kind of avoids me, and it makes it hard for me to meet the rest of my club who are mostly friends of hers (I'm a new member). I'm worried that this might have an impact on both of our commitments to the club.

Is there anyway I can slowly start clearing the air? How should I approach this issue without ignoring an entire half of my club?
>>
>>16944488
you're both comsenting adults, and i don't see the problem
try getting back together
maybe show her off to your parents?
>>
>>16944497
I don't see it either but she gets anxious and worried over stuff a lot.
I tried but she's adamant "we" need time apart and I should respect that. She thinks this will be good for us in the long term.

She's met my parents. My family likes her.

Everything I read on the internet is pretty much just saying "she is using this to fuck other guys/date around and use you as a fallback."

I asked her if I should move on and she said she doesn't want that. But man this hurts.

If I hook up with strange cause, well, I was broken up with and she finds out I know it's done forever.

Alternatively, I feel if I don't then I'm going to find out she's doing the same thing.
>>
>>16944508
Did she give you a timeframe?

If you want to wait, wait. It sounds like your hookup would just be a hookup because you feel bad, that will make you happy but ruin your relationship.

Do I'd say either wait it out and see, or break up now without seeking out someone else first. Because you've already said that's what a hookup would be: the end of your relationship.
>>
>>16944517
No time frame.

"I'll let you know when I feel ready." is the gist. She said she's not wanting ANY romance from anyone for a while but the sad and hurt part of me is thinking she's just saying that cause she doesn't have the cojones to tell the truth.

I'm debating on sending a text right now that says "we figure this out or we're done forever" but I really want her back and from what I understand just giving htem space is the only way to get them back.

I want to wait. Any hook ups would be because I feel bad and want my dick wet with validation and affirmation.
>>
Guys:
I´m kinda dating a close friend of mine, today he told me i could ask him to slow down or speed up the relationship and that if i wanted any sex related thing i could ask him, however, i started talking to him about things we could do and he got very awkward.

I´m 99% sure he is a virgin and he knows i´ve had partners before, could this be the reason? What should i do?
>>
>>16944616
It could be.

I'm a wizard, and if a person I was seeing asked me I, personally, would tell them the truth.

Either way, if he offered to do whatever you want, maybe talk to him about his reaction.

It doesn't seem like something you can ignore. It just seems weird that he basically gave you a green light and then seemed uncomfortable when you took it.
>>
>>16944616
If you seem comfortable he'll be more comfortable. As you said, you have more experience. Guide him through it if you must. If you want, initiate. Make the first move due to the fact that he almost definitely won't. It may not seem like it's as much of a big deal for guys, but it's still the big v-card. If you can handle being his first, go for it. Guide him through the motions, how you both can get the most pleasure out of it.
>>
For anyone really that has had any kind of experience similar to this, but when i first met up with my long distance gf we stayed together for a week, we had sex i think every night, about 85% of it was great, but the other 15% of it i had trouble staying hard. I'm not sure if this was because i developed from jerking off too much or maybe just a little anxiety from it being our first time with each other, or maybe a bit of both.

We're meeting up again in a few weeks and i don't want that to happen again, I'm in my early 20s and it freaked me out not being able to stay hard even though it only happened a couple of times. I used to jerk off everyday sometimes multiple times a day but i have really cut down on that and plan to keep it cut down to see if that helps.

Is there anything else i can do or anyone had similar experiences or anything?
>>
>>16944693
just nofap until she's there
if you must fap, edge and make sure you stop before you cum
talk to a doctor if it's a real problem
>>
>>16944616
not only is he 100% certainly a virgin, you should also get him to a doctor asap as it seems he also has no spine
>>
Guys: what do you like being done to you during sex, what pleases you (generally)?
>>
Do you think my 'bad side' will come out when/if i ever get into a LTR? Or is it just that my family and i are better off seeing each other sporadically?

>I love my family but some things they do grate on me and I fly into a rage over stupid shit
>I just yell my argument, never gotten physical or called names
>I can't accept that I've done wrong at all and just keep making stupid angry arguments
>I've made a lot of friends since i left for college and never came close to yelling about anything
>i have apologized for things i did that were wrong, and meant my apology and changed myself
>i LIKE who I am, away from my family
>the second i come back home
>i start being bitchy again

I don't fly in a rage all the time, there's just some topics and stuff that my mom brings up. Most of the time we(my family) have a great time but...i'm scared if i find someone I like, that i'll start acting like this? But maybe it's just my family?
>>
Question to both Genders: Should sex be much harder to get? Or should it be easier?
>>
I have a fear of being embarrassed, feel afraid to talk to new people, especially girls, and I'm afraid I will get into danger without looking for trouble or anything.

And yet I'm not afraid to walk into an unknown forest in the middle of the night while it's pitch black outside being preyed upon by hungry predators that could easily kill me if I left my guard down.

What the fuck is wrong with me?
>>
>>16944723
If you can, ask the man.

For me, I like it when a girl sucks on my nipples while stroking me, don't know why I just do.

Ball licking not so much, too sensitive.
>>
>>16944737
Definitely easier, especially for women. You shouldn't be labeled a slut because you're a perfectly healthy human being.
>inb4 hurr durr don't act like a slut and you won't be called one
My friend got called a slut because she got into a relationship one month after her last one ended. Apparently she didn't wait long enough.

Don't get me wrong, guys get it shitty as well. They're told they need to fuck as much and as early as they can. That's why a lot of dudes are so desperate for sex.

My thing is, everyone should have as much sex as they want and when they want it. If you're a girl and you like to have a lot of sex, that's cool, if you're a dude who doesn't want to have sex just yet and would rather wait for someone special, that's cool too.
>>
>>16944359
Give a couple of days between when you last asked them to hang out, and when you ask them to go to the event.
If you wait to long, like the other anon said it'll just give them less time to prepare and increase the likelyhood that they'll be busy.
Also if you keep it close to when you last asked them, it'll seem like a follow-up, which is a good thing. "Since you were busy last time, maybe we could hang out at the [event]?"
I understand the worry about asking too soon being weird, but a grace period of 3-4 days (at most) is plenty of time. If you ask within a day, it might be weird.
>>
>>16944698
I'm not the guy that you're replying to, but I want to say my experience.
If I do what you said, I have even more difficult to stay hard.
What works for me is just avoiding fapping and watching porn too much (1 time per day is fine).

>>16944723
Aside from my fetishes, I like to be caressed.

>>16944738
Social anxiety.
>>
>>16944762
>You shouldn't be labeled a slut because you're a perfectly healthy human being.

Give me one logical reason why I should ever call any female a slut.

No, seriously, give me a fucking reason, because I can't find one.
>>
>>16944738
Animals are way more afraid of you thatyou are of them... They don't attack uncalled for. If you don't make them feel disturbed or threatened, they won't do shit to you.
Humans not so much, but mostly.
What are tou afraid of? Yeah, a girl might reject you. So what? You feel unwanted. Ok. By ONE girl. You don't know her reasoning behind her decision. Maybe she was pms'ing hard and wanted to be left alone. Heaven knows.
BUT: You will also feel like you accomplished something. You where daring. THIS is the emotion you want to take out of this. Not the rejection, the pride of actually actively doing something. Pride and accomplishements beats lethargy and uncertainty every day.
>>
>>16944774
What's wrong with having sex? Would you call a guy a slut?
>>
So I fucked up and didn't trust my girlfriend and got mad and stopped talking to her for a few days. she's super mad and won't accept my apology. Is there anything I can do to fix this?
>>
>>16944777
>Would you call a guy a slut?
>guy
>a slut

Of course not.
>>
>>16944448
Everyone experiences love differently, just because you love someone doesn't mean you have to be clinging onto their memory long after they're gone. The circumstances of a breakup also greatly affect how you emotionally feel about the other person after the fact, it sounds like things broke off between you two very peacefully and cleanly, so good for both of you for being mature adults, I guess.

Lead the conversation in the general direction of relationships first if that helps you get comfortable, and then just simply ask "do you have a boyfriend?" Starting out a conversation with that question is the only way it might be creepy, but as long as it's part of an already-happening conversation, I don't think anyone, guy or girl, would be too bothered by it. In fact, work it into asking them out on a date at the same time, like "there's an event at blah blah blah, you wouldn't happen to be free?"

Most guys and girls aren't bothered by being asked out while in a relationship or by people they're not interested in, but they are bothered when the person asking them out stops showing any interest after being turned down.
If you don't want it to be awkward, make sure YOU are fine with being her friend even if she turns you down.
If she turns you down, you can remain friends.
If she accepts, all the better.
>>
>>16944778
You weren't there when she needed you, and also ignoring her was a pretty immature and disrespectful reaction. you could own up to it and apologize and try to change, but it might not help as you did kind of fuck up
>>
>>16944778
Based in what didn't you trust her and how did you express that?
>>
>>16944779
Oh, so you're the "a key that opens blah blah" type of guy.

That's cool. Nothing wrong in being an idiot. Just don't reproduce.
>>
>>16944775
My emotions are very sensitive, if I get rejected I get hit really fucking hard, it's like being drowned in negativity and my throat being strangled by the hands of Death itself.
>>
>>16944779
I'm assuming you don't talk to many women at all. But you know damn well what that anon meant, come on, you're smarter than this.
>>
>>16944777
>call a guy a slut?

That's the same thing as calling a lesbian a faggot, it doesn't sync at all.

Calling a homosexual man a faggot does make sense, but calling a straight man a slut doesn't.

Calling a homosexual man a slut does make sense.

Is this sexist?
>>
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>>16944787
>"a key that opens blah blah"
>>
>>16944779
Oh boy... Guys still think there exist double standarts. Hooking up randomly mostly is an immature and stupid decision. Making dumb decisions and not valuing intimacy and commitment are red flags regardless of gender. if a guy is going with every opportunity he gets to get his dick wet he's not bf material.
>>
>>16944455
Body language.
If they fidget after a few seconds of silence, they find it awkward. Most people will try to fill the silence themselves anyway, especially if they are the ones feeling awkward, but if they look around and seem uncomfortable, as though they're looking for a topic to talk about, then keep talking for their sake.

Also, be outwardly confident about how comfortable you are with silence. If you're worrying so much about her being uncomfortable with the silence, she might think you are the one uncomfortable with the silence, and try to talk even though you both are fine with silence, and then you're both miserable because you're misreading each other.
Make it clear with body language that you're calm and happy at the moment, if they're also comfortable with silence they'll act more comfortable. If they're uncomfortable with it, they'll feel okay with continuing the conversation themselves, or make it clear that they want you to keep talking.
>>
>>16944785
>>16944786
She was spending alot of time with an ex who was in town, particularly a guy she left to be with me. I didn't believe her that there was nothing between them, but I've confirmed that she was telling the truth through mutual friends. We fought about it and I stopped responding to her for a few days. We talked today and I explained what had led me to believe she was being dishonest and how I regret taking advice from my friends. I told her that I'm very sorry and that I feel like a piece of shit. I told her that I hope she can forgive me.
>>
>>16944790
>Is this sexist?

Yep. I might be getting this wrong but you think a guy having a lot of sex is okay but a girl doing the same is not.

>>16944791
You never heard the phrase "A key that opens a lot of locks is a master key but a lock that gets opened by a lot of keys is a shitty lock"? It doesn't make sense? Who's the lock and the key? What is opening the lock in that metaphor? Is it seducing someone? If so, guys are way more desperate for sex so a girl will seduce more partners that a guy will. Is it about sex? If so, most keys (penises) fit into most (vaginas) because otherwise we would die out as a species.
>>
>>16944494
Just nut up and talk to her alone, lay the situation out on the table.
Say things feel awkward and you don't want them to be. If she isn't interested in you she should just say so, and that it's fine.
That'll prompt her to either comfirm or deny it, and you can both move on happily.
>>
>>16944796
Also she told me that if I was really sorry that I would have contacted her earlier.
>>
>>16944787
>>16944789
>>16944792
Isn't it offensive to call a girl a slut?

The fuck is wrong with you? Do you dudes actually want to get into a fight or some shit?

Yes its illegal to antagonize people into attacking you and you can get arrested and prosecuted for it.
>>
>>16944494
I'm a dude but depending on the club you should just try to become friends with people without going through her. I just act like nothing happened usually.

What's she gonna say?
>I went on a date with him and had a bad time YOU CANT BE FRIENDS WITH HIM REEEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>16944616
>>16944640
Don't be too confident, if the fact that he's a virgin and you've had partners before bothers him, as it does many guys, then acting too confident and experienced will make him feel inadequate and embarassed, or perhaps ashamed of your "impurity".
If you feel like your differing experience levels are a problem to him, don't be afraid to initiate sex, but let him lead for most of the first time.
>>
>>16944788
Everybodies emotions are sensitive.
Some show it, some don't. That's what i tried to explain to you. It doesn't really matter what is hapoening. It has NO impact on your emotions. YOU decide what impact something has on you. For example: somebody makes a mean comment about your new hair cut. There is a phletora of ways to react to that. You can tell them to shut their whore mouth. You can punch their teeth out. Yoi can tell them that they are so 2001. You can tell them that you aren't happy with it eother and ate going to sue your hairdresser. You can tell them that they are just jealouse. You can say "oh" and hang your head. You can give them a death stare and never talk to them again. You can throw a fit and start throwing your wallet at them. You can go to the bathroom and bawl your eyes out. You can run away screaming "blaspyemie!". And so on. There is no set way an incident affects people. If you aren't happy with how you react to certain situations, just try a different reaction next time till you are content. For example, you could just go on with your day knowing that aslomg as you are happy with your hair nobody can bring you down about that topic. It's called self worth dude.
>>
>>16944806
>then acting too confident and experienced will make him feel inadequate and embarassed, or perhaps ashamed of your "impurity"

Wut? I think you're projecting some 4chan forever-alone/bitter tier shit there.
>>
>>16944778
>>16944796
To be honest, I don't see a way to recover from this. No one likes it when their SO doesn't trust them. If she left him to be with you, there are two problems with this: first of all, you should have been secure in the knowledge that she choose you over him, and secondly, the fact that you were so distrusting over this means that you know that if she did this with you, she could do this to you. Both of these issues are issues with you, not her.
>>
>>16944814
It's a completely possible scenario, I'm not saying it's guaranteed to happen but she asked if their difference in experiences could be the reason, and if it is a reason for distress in their relationship it would be along those lines.
>>
>>16944807
>It's called self worth dude.

And if the asshole attacks me for responding in any way or not responding to him/her at all?

This is the other problem.

I know its unlikely to happen, but 0% and 100% don't exist so yes I'm paranoid of this ever happening at all time 24/7 combined with my country's liberal self defense laws.
>>
>>16944821
>country's liberal self defense laws
do we really have to do this all over again anon?

sure, it's possible. but 99% of people aren't bombs walking around waiting to explode all over you at the slightest provocation. your goal is to not be agressive and provocant. not even passively. be assertive instead. if somebody trows a hissy fit on you for acting in such a way. deal with it the moment it happens. might be clichée, but there's a saying i think holds some truth:
worry never robs tomorrow of it's sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.
>>
>>16944830
>do we really have to do this all over again anon?

Well excuse me for being unable to run away or hide or un-allowed to push assholes in self defense.
>>
>>16944836
Here we go again...
I'm out. I don't like to discuss something with broken records
>>
>>16944838
I learnt not to bother with that anon a long time ago.
>>
>>16944818
What's the best way to approach resolving this?
>>
Alright so I flirt with this girl on a regular basis, she compliments me and so forth. kinda shy, she's never made a move.

She doesn't have a boyfriend but rarely she'd pop up along side me and we'd have a chance to talk.

Any tips for conversation starters? She doesn't respond well with general mundane questions or shit like that.
>>
For Girls:
You receive a birthday message from a man. What makes him a friend and what makes him a beta-orbiter? Where's the difference in detail?
>>
>>16944898
What? A birthday message is a birthday message. Girls don't think in your /r9k/ categories
>>
>>16944898
The difference is his intentions versus hers. If she's into him, he's more than a friend. If she doesn't fancy him but he's trying his luck with her anyway (as more than friends) then orbit status could apply
>>
>>16944917
So you say, any birthday message will get recognized as a simple message to wish a happy birthday?

>>16944924
Okay. A follow-up question: Consider I don't know on what my intentions are based. But I know and am interested, that this message may make her happy. I don't want to be that guy, who is only acting because he wants more than friendship. It's not fair for her nor me.
What is a good "line", indicator or something to orientate. to make a decision? Or: Is there a way to wish a friend happy birthday, if both know I have had more feelings for her, while not bring up the feeling/idea of me acting only because of old feelings? What if I want to make her happy? Or am I the wrong person for this?
>>
>>16944898
The fact that you think that way makes you a beta-orbiter. A friend wouldn't be worried about that, because he's an actual friend.
See, the difference is you. Not her.
>>
>>16944947
>So you say, any birthday message will get recognized as a simple message to wish a happy birthday?
Yes, why wouldn't it?
>>
>>16944947
If you don't know why you are doing it, figure that shit out.

But you're over thinking this. Just say happy birthday. She's not going to think you are in love with her just because you give a greeting she's getting a hundred times over.
>>
>>16944950
>>16944951
I didn't considered it too until I read it in another thread. Thought of it as it's a simple gesture and nice to get those messages (that someone thought of you).
>>
>>16944959
That's what it is.
>>
Ok so i got rejected by a friend, but i wanna be a better friend. How do i be that and not a beta orbiter?
>>
>>16945004
I don't understand. Did you have feelings for a friend and they rejected you so now you want to be a better friend with them?
>>
How can I work on conversation starters that aren't the typical 'What's your major' and making people want to blow their brains out
>>
>>16945021
"What keeps you from blowing your brain out?"
>>
>>16944508
>I tried but she's adamant "we" need time apart and I should respect that.
The fact she called it a break, rather than "I need some time alone to gather my thoughts" is telling mate. The latter is fairly reasonable, but people don't go on breaks unless they have someone else in mind. I wouldnt bother putting in a lot of effort in your situation.

>>16944616
Just don't make him feel judged. That's probably going to be the biggest source of anxiety, and it'll snowball if he does. Once he develops a decent sense of what he's doing it should mellow out.
>>
Girls, would you keep a guy around who asks you out a lot and continuously shows signs that he's madly into you, just for attention and the ego-boost that somebody likes you?

Not asking out of experience, just hypothetical. Be honest, it's anonymous~
>>
>>16944762
>Definitely easier, especially for women. You shouldn't be labeled a slut because you're a perfectly healthy human being.
Stigma is different from accessibility. It's easy to get casual sex as a woman. It's when you factor in relationships that things become more muddled.

>My thing is, everyone should have as much sex as they want and when they want it. If you're a girl and you like to have a lot of sex, that's cool, if you're a dude who doesn't want to have sex just yet and would rather wait for someone special, that's cool too.
The problem is the pareto principle also applies to sex. It's the minority of men getting the majority of the sex. I would go so far as to argue that if sex was more evenly distributed, the stigma against it would also go away.
>>
>>16945053
>It's easy to get casual sex as a woman

Bad casual sex? Sure. If you're hungry you can just step out on the street, open your mouth and wait for a homeless person to shit inside of it.

>>16945053
>I would go so far as to argue that if sex was more evenly distributed

And how would you propose we do that?
>>
>>16945058
>Bad casual sex? Sure. If you're hungry you can just step out on the street, open your mouth and wait for a homeless person to shit inside of it.
I think you're really discounting the fact that most of your male friends have probably thought of you in some sexual way assuming you're somewhat attractive.

>And how would you propose we do that?
I see a lot of women think they deserve a prince charming, when they're nothing like a princess. Maybe it gets better with age, but ultimately I'm working with the people at my campus. The women in my engineering course are rather reasonable on the flipside I've noticed though.

Some men develop similar notions, but they tend to get shut down if they voice these beliefs in the real world. Hell we had that one guy from RoK banned from entire continents.

Basically, I'd encourage people to be more realistic about what their market value is. People take disney movies at face value too much.
>>
>>16945067
>I think you're really discounting the fact that most of your male friends have probably thought of you in some sexual way assuming you're somewhat attractive.

I'm a dude bro. The fact doesn't change, most hook ups suck for girls because the guys are too focused on getting themselves off.
>>
>>16945071
Casual sex entails more than just one night stands.

Yeah, if you sleep with a stranger who has no investment he's going to be selfish. Hence why I tend to suggest FWB situations over that.
>>
>>16945074
And FWB never go wrong, don't they? Sex never complicates stuff and there's no risk of either sides catching feelings.
>>
If a girl doesnt text back the second day is it over
>>
>>16945075
>Sex never complicates stuff and there's no risk of either sides catching feelings.
Which is kind of a different issue from our topic, if casual sex should be easier or more difficult to get.

So let me flip it back to what you originally said, that you want to reduce the stigma of casual sex. What happens when the stigma is removed? Do you think one night stands will somehow become better overnight? That people will stop being selfish with a person they don't know or care about?

Odds are, probably not. So it's either deal with that unsatisfying sex you compared to hobo shit, or develop some FWB situation. I'm not exactly seeing a third option here. I'd rather deal with the risk of developing feelings, than empty hollowing sex with strangers.
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>>16945082
If the stigma is gone, people won't be dicks about other people having sex. That's it. I think it's worth it.
>>
Noice, the question i was about to ask is related t othe current topic.

Either way.

I'm a 21 kv, not because i'm too socially retarded or something to not get women who like me, but rather because i want it, at least the first, to be with someone i actually like, and so i avoided possible relationships.

The thing is, given my age, and one of my close circle of friends being women who are basically the Sex and the City crew(when it comes to sex, actually, since they're not the "fancy" kind), made me question whether i'm just being too innocent or something.

tl;dr, as a 21 kv(yes, i know people got farther than that without getting any), is it childish or unreasonable to want my firsts to be with someone i actually like?

For reference, i almost made it to an actual relationship about a year and a half, if it wasn't because i was afraid of the girl not being available, despite she showing interest in me.
>>
>>16945098
>is it childish or unreasonable to want my firsts to be with someone i actually like?
lolno

I mean, I probably wouldnt be doing what you're doing but there's 0 obligation to have sex if you don't want to. If a woman gives you shit over that she's being a silly little cunt and isnt worth dating to begin with.
>>
>>16945098
I don't really understand, what's the topic. Is there someone or something who wants you to have sex?
I mean, you describe a problem, but there is no one who creates this problem or is annoyed if you don't solve it.
If you want a person you like to have sex with, then wait for her. If you don't want to wait any longer, fuck someone.
>>
>>16945102
>>16945104
Despite a few weird looks, no one but myself is actually questioning my decision. It's just that being around sex-loving people and males who put sex in a pedestal made me kinda question my own feelings, even if it's a shit reason to do it.

It may also be because there's this one girl in another city who really likes me, to the point that i feel she wouldn't let go of me at least for a couple of days if she ever saw me(hyperbole, but you get my point); but i don't feel anything for her, even if it may be a free "stop being a virgin" ticket.
>>
>>16945114
A lot of guys put sex on a pedestal because it reaffirms their masculinity in their head. Just do you.

As far as the girl goes, there's nothing to feel guilty about if you don't like her. I'd actually advocate against sleeping with her if feelings are going only one way, because even if you were ashamed of your virginity it would make things a lot more complicated and a bit unethical.
>>
My girlfriend doesn't trust me. We've been together for a month and she refuses to come into my apartment. She said she's "uncomfortable being alone with a man". We're both 25 and prior to this we've only gone on dates in public places.

I told her that I trust her and it's a little upsetting she doesn't trust me, and that if she comes inside, she can leave whenever she wants, but no dice.

How can I ease her into this? Going on dates every few days is getting cumbersome, I want to just relax with her, cook her dinner, etc.
>>
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Do women care if I don't have a lot of body hair?

I'm 26, have zero chest hair. Arm/leg hair is still short and fine; having blonde hair doesn't help its visibility. I also can't grow facial hair (maybe 2cm length if I don't shave for 6 months).

I've got thick head hair and my pubes/armpits are out of control, so I don't know what's going on. I've been told time and time again I'll likely not begin balding until I'm in my 70s/80s, so it isn't a problem of losing hair/having "weak" hair.

I just don't know if women equate bushy chest hair with manliness or whatever.
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>Doesn't have kids but wants them

This is what my OKC profile says. Do girls generally understand this means "I don't have kids but have a belief in having children/I want to have kids one day" and not "I want kids now"? I don't know if "Doesn't have kids but might want them" is a better thing to put on my profile.

I'm only 23: I absolutely want to get married and have children but seriously not for another like 8-9 years.
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Friend lost some weight, and she asked me for thoughts on facebook. Truthfully, I thought she was a bit cuter before, but I'll admit I'm a bit of a chubby chaser.

Should I just tell her the truth or tell her she looks good because she's proud of the change?
>>
I'm a business owner and have many contracted workers under my employ. Things like photographer, artist, graphic designer, etc. My graphic designer has a daughter I went to highschool with and I kind of want to ask her out.

Does the "don't shit where you eat" rule apply in this scenario?
>>
>>16945141
Tell her you're very proud of her weight loss and she looks good, but you thought she looked great before too.
>>
>>16945133
Nah. A bit of body hair is sexy, but it's surely not a big deal if you don't have much of it.
Take pubes and armpits hair under control.
>>
>>16945126
>Going on dates every few days is getting cumbersome, I want to just relax with her, cook her dinner, etc.
Did you said/mentioned it to her? Asked her, what the actual problem is or how she could help you? Tell her how you feel around her and what you feel for her.
Hug her, smile at her, words aren't always needed.
>>
>>16945144
>>Does the "don't shit where you eat" rule apply in this scenario?
If things would go bad, do you think it will affect the situation at work?
>>
>>16945014
Yeah, that's it exactly. I liked them romantically but that grew out of wanting to be a closer friend because we have a lot in common. I still want to be a closer, genuine friend, but not an orbiter.
>>
>>16944728
Everyone in my family is this exact same way. My father and his four sisters will argue and scream at each other, and if my grandmother gets involved it can turn into a week long feud.
One thing that's very clear however, is that none of the four sisters will argue with their husbands. Everyone else gets it, but spouses seem to get off free.
>>
Ladies. I am very finanically aware. Some would say cheap, others minimalist. I say I owe nobody money and can come and go as I please.

I like to keep costs down. I live in a basic basement apartment in a major city. I do not have a tv, since I have a laptop. My only excesses are my wardrobe and my books. Mostly books.

Even my bed is simply a futon. My life is almost entirely digital.

Would this be a problem for you? I just don't really see the point in excessive decorating or buying stuff I don't need.
>>
Do girls really like the silent type?
>>
>>16945338
It's not a problem, no.
I am obsessed with interior decoration because it makes me feel good, so I know how much it costs. I'd give you suggestions, but at the end it's up to you.
Get a decent bed, tho. Futon makes you look trashy.
>>
>>16945345
Depends on the girls, some do, some don't.
I personally really like them. I don't think that talking constantly means communicating.
>>
>>16944392
>how do I flirt?
Flirting is the act of making your attraction to someone as obvious as possible. It just takes practise to be able to recognize the signs that someone is flirting back or not interested. You have to realize that rejection will happen... it's like riding a bike. You'll fuck up a lot, but the damage is superficial and you'll survive it. You'll get better the more you try.
>>
>>16944737
Easier. Sex is one of the most natural things and we all represent an unbroken line of people who fucked. In the perfect world, sex would be as normal as drinking coffee.
>>
>>16944774
Because sex is fun and extremely normal (everyone's parents and grandparents did it, lol). Having a lot of it, or even many different partners is not damaging or really negative in any way.

However, cheating and/or hurting people via sex is always bad.
>>
>>16945338
I need a futon - no way I could fit a sofa or chaise longue in my lounge
>>
>>16945349
So you're okay with him not saying much when on a date or something?
>>
To anyone really:
Recently lost my virginity and had sex a few more times after, how do I last longer in bed? I only last a few minutes and I want to make my gf orgasm. I fap fairly regularly so I'm not sure what else to do
>>
>>16945014
Best way is to ask them out properly. Not using secret signs or hints. Directly. Tell them how feel. Then if you both enjoy your friendship. There's no orbiting. Orbiting i think is when someone hangs around you with the permanent secret objective of getting with you but without asking you directly, so it's harder to say no. In some cases though, feelings could be reciprocated so that's not some destiny to be doomed approach
>>
>>16945392
Conversation should be fluid when we decide to have it. I just don't think it's always necessary to have it.
If someone asks me out on a date where we don't do much but eat and talk, I do expect him to talk.
>>
>>16945398
Change position whenever you get close.
My boyfriend lasts longer when I am on top and I enjoy it more.
>>
Girls

How do you show your interest in a guy?
>>
>>16945044
She told me she isn't ready for any romance in any way from anybody.

But breaks are always just an excuse to fuck around?
>>
>>16945126
>25
>"uncomfortable being alone with a man"
LOL
You're dating a broken girl. Either get a therapist or leave.

>>16945424
Either you're trolling or have a mental disorder for not knowing what she wants.
She thinks you're hot and wants to fuck.
>>
>>16945398
Foreplay. It's rather uncommon for girls to orgasm from penetration.
>>
>>16945126
How long have you been together?
You can't force people to trust you. If she's not ready, she's not ready. You're shooting yourself in the foot by being impatient. That's showing her that you don't respect her boundaries.

I've had guys completely 180 in personality once we were alone. I've had guys who seemed kind and patient turn pushy and hungry.

I don't understand why you're upset with her. It's not like she is doing this out of spite. She's just cautious and wants to know you better. It isn't personal.
>>
>>16945137
>"Doesn't have kids but might want them" is a better thing to put on my profile.
This
>>
My body is not very responsive to touch. I have huge problrms with reaching an orgasm (masturbation works sometimes). I also have a rather high pain tolerance. Am i broken? I'm jealous of my bf. He gets goosebumps even from a tiny kiss on his neck or gently nibbling his earlobs... I wish i had that too. Is there something i can do to increase sensibility?
>>
>>16945487
You were prolly molested as a kid or something
>>
>>16945495
I don't think so. But my dad was physically and emotionally abusive. Could that really be a reason? What do?
>>
>>16945487
You're probably not ticklish, right? I'm not sure if there's a way to improve that. Some people are just like that.
I'm like your bf. I'm very sensitive, which is nice because I have tickle fetish.
>>
>>16945506
>I have tickle fetish.

You're even lower than the feet fuckers, you sick fuck.
>>
>>16945506
No, i'm not. Well, maybe a tiny bit. But only if i'm in the mood and in specific spots. I akways win tickle-fights. I'm in therapy anyways, should i ask my therapist about this? It seems like such a tiny "problem", i'm not sure if it is worth mentioning...
>>
>>16945495
Fucking learn to spell.
Jesus, it doesn't take long to type out the actual word 'probably'.
>>
What manipulation tricks work on girls? I've been learning to manipulate guys but girls are different.
>>
>>16945401
But I did ask them out, they said no. Should I just take them aside and talk to them about it one day and tell them how I feel?
>>
>>16945513
I'm both. lol

>>16945523
I think you should give it a try, tell the therapist.
>>
How to I keep a conversation going on Facebook without making it super obvious? Been talking to a girl I like (we aren't even friends on FB, just asked her a question about uni work) and once we stopped talking about it, the conversation just died.
>>
>>16945564
I'll do that. But i don't really think there's anything i can do about it. Thanks for your help anyways, anon
>>
>>16945487
Vibrators?
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>>16945653
Not really. If i'm not aroused enough it's uncomfortable. When i'm aroused my clit kind of goes numb. I'm amazed that my bf hasn't developed carpal-tunnel-syndrom yet...
>>
A couple weeks ago I was stabbed in the arm. Some guy wanted to steal my watch; when I resisted, he jabbed a paring knife into my upper arm. The guy ran.

While I waited for an ambulance, I flagged down a car that drove by and asked the woman inside if she had any tissues I could put around the knife so it wouldn't bleed all over me. She was very nice and waited with me for the ambulance.

It turns out this woman works at a store near my house. Is it inappropriate to ask her out?
>>
Women:
I'm trying to help my spouse lose weight, 200+ pounds. I'm not perfect by any stretch, but she just cannot make time to work out or even keep up the house well with me. When I was getting my degree, I still worked out late nights, she doesn't want to workout past 8:30! And we're both night owls! Going on 4 years of marriage, been together 5.5.

Do I just give up?
>>
>>16945680

Go ahead.

She stuck around to help you, you have reason to talk to her--if nothing else, just to thank her again.

Either have a probing convo if you want, or just tell her you appreciated her company while the ambulance came and ask if you can take her to dinner as a thank you.

If you want to go super formal you can even ask if it'd be appropriate to take her to dinner as a thank you.

Up to you and what you think you can pull off.

Nothing is ever weird if you approach it the right way (which is easier said than done, but surprisingly true in even some pretty extreme circumstances).
>>
>>16945684
You can't make someone live up to your expectations. You can only be responsible and fair to yourself.
>>
I've been texting this chick I go to college with, we click perfectly in person but our text conversations seem stale and uninteresting, how do I text better and have at least somewhat interesting conversations?
>>
>>16945722
Start texting about making plans and then spend more time together in person. Anticipation is very pleasant.
>>
Question for guys, but if any other girls can figure this out I'd really like to know your thoughts.

I'm reading too far into this, I know, but it's just something I noticed so I'd like /adv/'s opinion since it's a bit strange.

25F here. A friend introduced a 28M to our group of friends and we've been hanging out together (as a group) for maybe 3-4 times now. Instantly we had good chemistry. We tend to talk to each other in individual conversation rather than join in with everyone else, just because we seem to have similar interests and humor. One of my friends is convinced he has feelings for me (so yay, but not the thing I have a question about).

So I noticed when people start leaving the hangout one by one, he'll say goodbye to them and use their name, like "Bye PersonX! See you at ___!" or "Later, PersonY!" but, with me he always says something like "Bye! I had fun" or some other sentiment that doesn't use my name. Even if I'm leaving with my roommate, he'll call out "Bye Anon'sRoommate!" and then turn to me and say something else to my face rather than sort of shouting it from the couch or whatever. I know he knows my name, because we email each other. But the thing is, at first I thought he was repeating people's names in order to get them memorized, like one of those things to not forget the names, but we've all hung out as a group so many times that I can't imagine he'd still be repeating them like this as a memory tactic.

What could this mean? I know it could just not mean anything. It's not bothering me. But once I noticed it, I've started thinking it's kind of... weird.
>>
>>16945822
Sorry if my question wasn't clear: Why isn't he using my name?
>>
>>16945822
My boyfriend and I rarely call each other by our names. We call our friends by our names, but I don't know, we just don't refer to each other by our names or use them to get each other's attention. I really don't know why it is, I don't think there is a reason at all. It's just something that happens
>>
>>16945825
>>16945822

Maybe you have a stupid name.
>>
>>16945822
You're reading too much into this. If you MUST have an answer, it might be because he wants to differentiate you from other people.
>>
>>16945832
Actually, I don't think my close friends and I use each other's names often, either... That's weird. If I need to get their attention then I will, but I'll usually say hello or goodbye without saying the actual name. Maybe it's a sign of familiarity then. Thanks for the input, anon.

>>16945840
I don't really need an answer, just wondered if anyone could think up a reason since I was drawing a blank. It doesn't bother me (because I agree, it's reading too much into it) but I thought it was sort of weird once I started noticing the pattern happening.

>>16945838
Lol this is a valid suggestion. My name is two syllables and pretty normal though.

Thanks for the answers, everyone.
>>
Am I being pedantic if i think it's weird my girlfriend almost never moisturizes and rarely bothers to put on sunscreen? It bothers me that she doesn't take care of her skin. I don't want her to think I'm policing her body or whatever stupid tumblr shit.

in her defense, I don't use sunscreen either but I'm black I don't burn
>>
>>16945854
Sunscreen isn't just for burning, it's for general sun damage which can happen to anyone of any skin tone. If you're not using it either, you're being a hypocrite.
>>
LADIES why are you so arrogant?
>>
>>16945875
Because we can be.
>>
>>16945875

Why are you such a bitch?
>>
>>16945854
>I don't use sunscreen either but I'm black I don't burn

That's not a valid excuse.

https://www.sharecare.com/health/sun-care/sunscreen-african-americans
>>
>>16945889
>>16945861
Fine, granted, but it isn't it more valid than burning all the time because she lives at the beach and then complaining about it? Am I that far in the wrong?
>>
>>16945051
No that sounds annoying more than anything
>>
>>16945895
If she's complaining all the time then fair enough, but have you tried leading by example? Obviously not, because you didn't think you even needed to wear it
>>
>>16945680
>2016
>still using a watch
You deserved it.
Tell her she saved your ass, now it is all hers. lol

>>16945684
>marries a fatass
>wants her to lose weight

>>16945722
Stop texting, save your conversations for real life.
>>
>>16944737
I think people should be less promiscuous, as promiscuity leads to many problems. However, most of /adv/ has quite new-aged hippy views on the subject. Don't take this as the norm.
>>
I have problems to look at big tits in the eyes.
>>
>>16945822
I read one time that using someones name makes that person like/appreciate/notice you more. It's like a sign of respect instead of just saying "hey you".I noticed a few of my more social friends use my name a lot so I started doing it as well. Whenever I'm in to a girl I'll use her name every time I reference her.
>>
Does having two or three girls on deck make me a scumbag? What if I have no interest in dating/relationships/marriage and they know that? Like the girls all know I don't really care about them and just want to have sex but I'll still text them and sometimes give my thoughts.
>>
>>16944508
I think your biggest problem here is that you're trying to have a long term relationship with a 19 year old. Most people aren't ready for anything serious at that age, if if they think or insist they are.
>>
>>16946016
Well not really.

You gotta be bit careful there though since chances are all of the girls have the delusion of taking you for themselves and making a relationship with you.
>>
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>>16945875
Because every day that a guy isn't creeping us out is a good day. Why is it so hard for some men to have a civilized and engaging conversation?

Now I know that some women aren't perfect angels either, we can be rude, gold digging, arrogant whores. I won't deny that. But some men are just plain rude, and sadly they in turn ruin our views on even the nicest of men. Because the "Hello, how are you?" soon turns into a "Fuck you bitch, I hope you suffocate on my dick."
>>
>>16944723
See
>>16944745
Ask him. All guys like different things. I hate having my nipples or balls licked/sucked/played with at all really. Give him anal though. Guys love anal.
>>
>>16946036
Hello, how are you?
>>
>>16946037
I on the other hand hate anal, don't listen to this anon, listen to your partner.
>>
>>16944774
Because some girls like being called sluts/whores while getting fucked. They just get off on being degraded and abused.
>>
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I'm really bad at explaining things so bear with me. To anyone regardless of gender, but I feel like it's relevant to this thread:
There's that guy in university, I don't talk to him all that much because we both hang out with different groups but I got to talk to him before. He looks ok, nothing special, but he's better then me at doing some college related stuff and he always talk like he's super confident. I guess I'm kind of jealous, which is normal even though it's not a good thing, but these days I can't help but think about him in situations that have absolutely nothing to do with him. I even had dreams about him. It's embarrassing as fuck and I can't look at him without cringeing at myself. I asked somewhere else and an anon told me that it may be that I admire him but I don't know. I feel disgusted by myself, it's hard to explain that feeling.

Also, I don't dare talking to him because I get easily embarrassed in general, especially with men, and the few times we talked, he doesn't joke around as much as he does with others and sometimes he even acts like he's annoyed, but he was always the one who initiated discussions. It's weird, I can't help but think that he dislikes me and maybe even makes fun of me behind my back sometimes. I just want to forget about it and ignore this all situation but it's kind of stressful because I have all my lectures and tutorial classes with him so I can't avoid him.
>>
>>16946046
if you're getting flustered and anxious around him that's pretty annoying. he'd probably be willing to forgive that if you look decent and let him hit from behind though.
>>
>>16946046
Pff, holy shit you are the most love struck person I've seen in ever. You didn't even ask a question because you got so caught up in talking about him. I'm going to recommend you go all in on this one and partake that monumental task of asking him out on a date. He's probably a bit uneasy around you because you're acting so damn weird and guys aren't all that good on picking this kind of thing up.
>>
>>16944774

>>16946045 has a point. Some get off on it, but that should be discussed beforehand.
>>
>>16946046
You want his dick.
>>
>>16946058
At the very least disambiguate the situation for him and tell him your feelings a little bit.
>>
>>16944325
Question for girls: How do you guys view awkwardness in a guy in terms of attraction? I've been told I'm pretty good looking, so does this off set awkwardness somehow in attraction terms?
>>
>>16946068
Attractiveness can override pretty much anything.
The scale depends on how attractive you are.
>>
>>16946052
>if you look decent
You're so funny anon...

>>16946058
>>16946062
How is that so obvious when I can't notice it by myself even though I'm usually too self-aware? The question was going to be "how do I do to stop thinking about him" but I forgot to type it because I thought the post was long enough. I'm tired. Anyway.
I'm not too sure if asking him on a date would be possible for a bunch of reasons but I guess I'll try to just talk to him more often from now on whenever I can.
>partake that monumental task of asking him out on a date
To be honest it doesn't sound terrifying. Fuck, being shy sucks so much.
>>
>>16946071
I've been told I could be a model so I guess my awkwardness doesn't matter that much then.
>>
No more alimony, no more child support. If you can't support a kid on your own, don't break up with the father, or give the father custody if he can support the kid. If the father of your kid is a shithead, then you should have been more selective about who you opened your legs to. Live with your decisions and actions, like an adult. Women are treated like children by the state still despite all this "feminism" to try to supposedly be treated like adults.

Cut off their money. Make men and women reliant on each other again, partners, pair bonds, etc. Fix the West.
>>
How shy are you girls?
>>
>>16946089
Well like most 4channers they're probably pretty socially awkward/shy
>>
>>16946078
His huge confidence is doing that to you. You unconsciously love him. Your vagina is crazy to swallow his confident cock.
>>
>>16944616
do you carethat he's a virgin
>>
>Women:
What do you think of hairy men?
Do you find them unattractive?
>>
>>16946087
Fuck off Donald.
>>
>>16946113
>Not reading the first post.
Some women like it, some don't. Stop being so autistic.
>>
>>16946068
Depends on how awkward you are and how easily you get over it.

>>16946089
Not that shy

>>16946113
They're fine. I really don't care
>>
Girls, how often do you listen to your friends/let them corrupt you regarding a guy.

There's a girl I'm kinda getting to know quiet well, we message each other and go to class together though I overheard her friends saying that I'd probably be better looking if I was taller and more built. Considering we're uni students I thought that was a bit of a pathetic thing to say (I'm not even that skinny) but I'm worried that her friends will thing I'm not good enough for her and eventually tell her this shit.
>>
>>16946089
Depends on the situation. I'm not very shy, I can easily stand in front of groups and talk. I have a moderate amount of friends and wouldn't like to have too many either. I'm probably the first one to talk to a new person. However, my shy moments are if I meet people who I like/want to impress. Because then I just believe it's better to stay silent and not expose how stupid I am. I have a tendency to let words come out wrong because I'm bad at explaining myself, I'm also brutally honest. My friends know this though and can basically read my mind when I say something that doesn't add up.

I literally can't tell people how I feel so I refer to fruits or does certain hand movements to express myself. I feel like there aren't enough words to describe ones feelings at a particular moment. "I'm happy/sad/etc.." Doesn't suffice. Because I can have different kinds of happiness levels going on and even if I'm happy I might have sad thoughts in the back of my head. And no, I'm not autistic. I'm actually very in tune with my emotions.
>>
>>16946131
If she and her friends are openly discussing this, then you probably don't have a chance to begin with.
>>
>>16946135
She wasn't there, it was just her friends.

I see your point though.
>>
>>16946113
This heavily depends on the guy.. On some men it looks good, on others it does not. I used to hate hair, but the older I get I find it sexier, manlier.. But it might just be because fashion is really in favor for hairy men right now.
>>
>>16946089
I'd say I'm more reserved and awkward than shy.
>>
>>16946137
Well if she's interested in you and they know it, her friends probably won't be saying this stuff when she's around.
>>
>>16945822
Maybe because he was already talking with you, he doesn't need to call your attention? But he needs to specify the other people since they're across the room.
>>
Girl i am dating went to training camp for a month.
When we parted we parted like a couple.
But since she left, the communication is almost non existent. If i write something to her, she responds like more than a day after ive sent her the message.
This could show that shes losing interest, or simply she just doesnt think its important right now.
But its bugging me that i dont know whats the situation.
Should i call her out on it, or just go with the flow?
I dont want to be clingy and shit, but on the other hand fuck writing to her/thinking about her if shes not interested anymore.
>>
Okay. Question for the guys.
Virgin girl here.
What can I say to break the ice about the subject? Or do I simply not say anything? I figured I could blame my sucky skills in bed after the deed is done with something like: "I'm only going to get better from now on, so we can reach our sexual peak when we are 70." However, that only works on a committed relationship. If I accidentally pick up a guy, fuck and say that I will sound like the stereotypical creepy virgin girl ready for marriage. Would offering to make pancakes be a good choice?

Short version: How to lighten the mood after performing terrible in bed as a girl?
>>
>>16946191
Just admit you're a virgin before hand.

If the guy is a virgin too then he'll be less nervous.

If the guy is experienced then he'll have no problem showing you the ropes.
>>
>>16946191
>Would offering to make pancakes be a good choice?
LOL
>guy cums
>hey, bb, how about some pancakes?
Haha

I don't think it will be such a big deal. You're a girl, so you'd have to be really, really terrible to get a complaint. Usually it is the guy who leads the sex.
As long as you make a effort, don't worry about it.
>>
Girls.

How long do you wait after a breakup before you start dating / looking for new bf
>>
i will ask both genders as maybe one of you has done it before

I am looking for someone's facebook, Is there a way to find someone on facebook by birthdate?
>>
>>16946191
pancakes should do it
it really shouldnt be a big deal. just dont be the stereotypical crazy clinger virgin girl and you should be good. ask for instructions too, some people like that sort of thing
>>
>>16946165
Holy shit dawg, she'll be gone one month, just chill and roll with it. You can't expect someone to be permanently horny for you 24/7.
>>
>>16946191
Guys are not hard to please, give him a heads up on you being a virgin but you don't need to excuse anything.
>>
Girls-

Think I may have come off as creepy. Should I apologize, or just ignore it and try to avoid the girl (same major, small school, both graduating in 2 years) which might be hard?
>>
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>>16946101
Sounds romantic as fuck desu
>>
>>16946046
Sounds like you have feelings for this person.
>>
>>16946352
I know, right? lol
It's better than saying "I hope you suffocate on his dick."
>>
>>16946324
Don't apologize for being creepy, just behave in a not creepy manner and eventually your earlier behavior will be written off as a fluke
>>
>>16946191
As you're undressing right before the first time, tell him.
Guys love virgins.
>>
>>16946375
Everyone including my own family calls me creepy
I don't even know what it is I do
>>
>>16945904
>2016
>not having something that serves the roles of a conveniently placed timepiece and classy masculine jewelry at the same time
4chan is an 18+ site, Anon.
>>
Hey guys
Asked a girl out today and she said she would have to think about it and sort something out. Have I fucked up? Have I fallen for the relationship meme?
>>
>>16946466
That was a "no". Move on immediately.
>>
>>16946489
Ok thanks senpai
>>
Women, would you date a trap in a romantic way if they acted like a normal human being instead of like a sissy?

I like the idea of appearing like a woman, but I also like having a dick. I also wouldn't want to shut myself out of having romantic relationships with women.
>>
>>16946466
>Have I fucked up?
What? You just asked a girl out, not asked her to marry you. There's nothing to fuck up here, either she says "yes" and it's cool, or she says "no" and it's still cool because you've lost nothing.
>Have I fallen for the relationship meme?
what.
>>
>>16946466
Do you remember how psyched up and excited you were right as you were opening your mouth to ask her out?

Date women who demonstrate exactly that same level of excitement when they accept the offer.
>>
>>16946512
Good advice. Thanks man :3
>>
>>16945680
Yiu've just stumbled into a golden opportunity. Please do not pass this up. The chance has literally been GIVEN to you to ask her out to something, as a thank you, basically what the other anon said. You have the perfect excuse to do it. And if somehow it doesn't work, then it would be easy to just play it off as you returning the favor. Ez pz.
>>
>>16946441
I'm 28. Where is your god now?
>>
>>16946358
If everyone who replied thinks so then it must be true. Well, shit.
>>
This girl I'm infatuated with and taking out soon in a (presumed) romantic way talks a lot about how close she is with her best friend, the bother that her best friend's boyfriend is, and how the two of them (not the boyfriend) sleep together in detail. Just sleeping, but very closely and by the sound of it regularly too.

Is this normal for you girls? What's the L-word here, is she a girl in Love or a girl in Lesbians?
>>
>>16946191
>What can I say to break the oce
I'm a virgin
Really, it's that simple, he'll accommodate if need be
>>
>>16946502
Nah
>>
>>16946502
>would you date a trap in a romantic way if they acted like a normal human being
>trap
>acting like a normal human being
Seems like you're a little confused.
>>
We rarely ever text each other, and only meet once a week due to circumstances. How do I make her my gf guys? It seems that she IS interested, judging by the way she kind of flirts back.
>>
Girls

i have big problem so i visited someone's profile a few times a day for the last 3 days to see if she was online on a site to meet new people, problem is i just noticed your visitors appear everytime each time someone visits your profile and now i fear she will think i am a creep, if she asks me about it should i be fair about the reason or just say it's a bug on the site?
>>
>>16946783
She won't ask. And pls... Online dating is a shit anon
>>
>>16946773
We have WAY to little info to help. How do you know her? What do you text about? Have you been on a date? Asked her out?
>>
>>16946565
>a girl in lesbians

Yes. As it appears she likes to crawl into lesbians at night to feast on their organs that aren't infected by testosterone-loaded sperm.

But for real, it's not common. And the fact that she makes a big deal out of it gives two options. There's something fishy with that situation or she wants to fire up your imagination as an immature way of getting your attention.
>>
>>16946502
If you want to put up with all the horse-shit the lgbt world comes with...
>>
>>16946800
Been friends for 2 years, asked her out a few weeks ago, went on a date once. Due to school and her being in a minor car accident the 2nd date has not been made yet.
>>
Are there actually such a thing as girls that like chubby guys?
>>
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>>16946816
I don't act entirely masculine. I'm not hiding any part of my personality at this point in time. Most people like me, and I have no doubt about that. The only thing I want to change is my appearance every now and again.

Honestly, I don't expect that it would be well received by anybody, but I thought I'd ask anyway JUST IN CASE I WAS WRONG, you know?
>>
>>16946796
That makes me feel more at ease, the moment i saw her picture i just felt a connection with her for some reason, now i cant stop thinking about her.
>>
>>16946839
memememememe!! Lifelong chubby chaser right here and I can easily land others.
>>
>>16946830
Soooo... Why don't you ask her out again asap? Do you actively try to ruin this? Seriously anon. What's the matter? Text her to go see xyz movie this weekend, grab coffee tomorrow. Get dinner, go for a walk, whatever. You already went on a date. It's obvious both are interested. If you wait too long now she will assume that you lost interest. If you wait too long and then come at her again shr will think you only want to fuck her. Now hurry up
>>
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>>16946856
Wow a woman that can have sex with men

stop the fucking presses Johnson we have a new scoop
>>
>>16946839
I'd actually love a chubby bf. Not sure why i always end up with walking sticks or /fit/ guys...
>>
>>16946858
Eh I don't know if it's my luck or if she's intelligently rejecting me, but I've asked her several times.

The first time she went to her girl friend's birthday (she did). The second time she was busy studying for the exams she got the day after (she did). The third time, which happened last week, he legs still hadn't healed from the accident yet. If I ask her again now, I look like a needy bitch desu. Kinda a difficult situation I'm in right now.
>>
>>16946849
What's the appeal? Would occasionaly "dressing up" not suffice? I'd totally be ok with my bf doing this. I would want to know how i look in heels and make-up too if i was a guy. I'd like to feel pretty ebery once in a while. But if he legitly thinks he's the wrong gender and what not it would be too much of a confusing burden and i wouldn't want the whole drama that comes with it. Sorry i'm vain like that but relationships are already hard enough without added strain...
>>
>>16946867
Now it starts to smell fishy. If she was really interested she would have given you an alternative option after you asked. Have you noticed a loss in interest your texting/conversations too?
>>
>>16946878
We held hands for the first time last week lmao when I walked her back to the dorm. Idk this is pretty fucking weird.

She did text that when her legs heal she can go out again. Didn't specifically state whether that is with me or not.
>>
>>16946886
How long will that take? How severe is that injury? Is she not allowed to leave her bed? If not, she can still grab coffee... Tell her you want to see her asap.
>>
>>16946859
You are on my tip, bruh.
>>
>>16946873
I don't think I'm the wrong gender, nor would I want to permanently dress feminine. I should have specified that in my original post.

I'm like 5'4, I don't get a lot of facial hair, and I have been described as "baby-faced" more than a few times. I know I don't look like dog shit, but I don't feel good about myself all the time. If I could look good as a female, that might be a nice pick me up on those longer days.
>>
>>16946900
She had like rolls of bandages around her right legs, so a bit trouble walking normally. No crutches tho, so maybe 1 or 2 months. I walked her home to make her feel safe or some bullshit like that when in fact I just wanted to walk with her.

Thing is we usually meet once a week and each time for about an hour or two, as we sit next to each other during class. Like, literally shoulder to shoulder, so we're able to talk a lot. I don't really want to go for a coffee or something, more a date where we're gonna do more than normally.
>>
>>16946861
I think actions speak louder than words.
>>
Question for both genders. How do you keep finding stuff to do together on dates? I'm talking about when you've exhausted the worthwhile things in the list in the OP and there isn't really anything fun around to do in general.

This girl is the type to stay in. She doesn't like eating out, she doesn't like thrill rides or heights, she isn't very social or the chatty type that goes for coffee, and the past few times that we did met up we went for a movie. But the cinema's exhausted too now, since we've seen all the good films. I don't want to impose and hang at her place (I don't even know where she lives) and me and my home don't feel entertaining enough to have someone over myself. I don't live on my own, and most of what I have is tailored to one person. We're great together, I really enjoy being with her and we do have quite a bit of interests in common, but they're the kind of things you do on your own or can't meet up for, like internet stuff or reading.

So tl;dr how do you find date ideas?
>>
I exchanged numbers with a girl in class today, she actually brought it up, not me. She said so "we can ask each other questions about class if we a miss day" or something to that effect. I've talked to her only once before. I believe she may like me just by her body language and behavior when I talked to her. Should I text her and pursue her?
>>
>>16946940
Ask her out for coffee. If she shoots you down, you misread the situation.
>>
>>16946931
How many dates have you went on? I think it's time to meet up at each others places too if you did all the dates listed in the op. I don't know where you life, but dating is going to be much easier when it's summer again. You can comfily go for a picnic, a campfire, a walk, the beach, with a blanket and not freeze to death.
Other than that, go to the library together or something. You can do stuff "alongside" too. It feels nice
>>
>>16946916
So, what do you have in mind that would be more to your taste? Dinner? Movies?
1-2 months is a long time. Can't you do something like a road trip or whatever that is do-able with her legs now?
>>
>>16946915
Then keep it down to something you do once in a while and maybe in the comfort of your own home. I'd find it neat and also a turn on if i could "dress up" my bf.
>>
>>16946917
I think it would just be p comfy. But there aren't many chubby boys i know. Actually i only know 2. And they are either too young or in a relationship. Don't know why. I don't life in a starving country
>>
Okay girls, so there's a first-ish date coming up. Ish because you see each other very regularly already and are very close then, and met up once before in what didn't really turn out to be a date.

Anyway, date is coming up by next week. Yet even before that date you're hitting it off really well with the guy and have been doing so for a long time. Would it be wrong or creepy if the guy made a move before the date, or is it better to wait?

For context, we're classmates who spend almost every break together (though only sometimes alone) and ride the train together (always alone together, as far as you can call a train ride that)

In short, should I hold back until the date to escalate things and keep it strictly friendly/flirty now?
>>
>>16946297
You are right, normally i wouldnt be like this, its because we didnt define the thing between us just yet, and so the long response times are fucking with my mind
>>
>>16946973
Maybe both. We went to dinner and then the movies on our first date.

What's more troubling to me right now is will it be weird if I ask her again? As you can see, I've already asked several times.
>>
>>16946931
It's time to hang out in your bedrooms.
>>
>>16947009
Nah, not necessarily. Go with what comes naturally. Nobody said that therr is a rule that you can only escalate thimgs on a date or have to put the relationahip on hold till the next
"proper date".
>>
>>16947013
The ball is def in her court now. If you think she is legitly interested in keeping this going, you can ask one more time. If she gives an excuse witheout an alternative suggestion, drop it
>>
>>16947027
Yeah seems like a fair option. It's kinda surreal to me right now you know, like things are looking bright and at the same time maybe not really. Girls are so unpredictable.
>>
Girls, why do you require a university degree for potential partners? Do you also want my resume, criminal records and financial report?
>>
>>16947042
Oh my God, you have criminal records? Sorry but I can't make it to dinner, something came up...
>>
>>16947034
Yeah, she should have made it clearer if she is really interested. Proceed with caution but give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she's just awkward
>>
>>16947054
Haha
I have a CLEAN one actually.
>>
>>16947019
I keep getting the urge to escalate, but a crowded hall in a school building, a crowded train station or train seats in a place you can guess by now feel awkward and inappropriate to do anything other than talk and touch lightly.

I don't know how to tell if it's the natural thing to do. There's a street directly from the school building to the train station. Sometimes we keep walking into each other awkwardly with arms touching and I want to take her hand there, but that's somewhat crowded with schoolmates too. I just don't know if that's the right thing to do or if it'll creep her out and make me look weird to familiar faces.
>>
>>16947065
Also, she talks almost endlessly and while I like that and think it's cute, it's probably weird to just make a move when she's talking about her improvised dog pillow.
>>
>>16947074
Her WHAT?
and no, it's not that weird. Especially grabing het hand. sure it might go horribly wrong but i highly doubt it. And even if, you won't die from it. You like her, she likes you. She keeps searching for body contact. I think you're good
>>
Grill I work with is wayy too young(17, I'm 20) not to mention I'm very unavailable. She keeps hitting on me, I think it's kinda cute, but today she sorta. Idk...

Girl's don't have a place to put their phones because their pocketless, so mid-conversation she puts the phone. In her pants. Not on the side though, like above her vagina. I saw her.. Well, I didn't see the main event, but I can say she's well-shaven. I think it's about time to come clean, and sorta tell her I'm unavailable. How am I gonna do her in?
>>
>>16947137
Just tell her your dick is taken.
>>
>>16947148
Nvm. I just looked at all the threads here. All the depression, wanting to change, just all of it. I realized I don't need any help, I think this is just me trying to work some little things out so my life seems interesting. Man, I've got some issues, but at least I'm not alone. I think I'm gonna go play video games, or laugh with someone for a little while. Should be fun.
>>
>>16947156
Issues are issues, man. Just because you don't have crippling depression doesn't make you less important. Everyone has something. Also make it clear your dick is off limits. Unless you plan to wait till she's old enough.
>>
I'm a grill and my parents "jokingly" told a guy I was kind of beta orbiting in silence I was into him....what do I do or just kill myself
>>
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Is it even possible to talk to blonde blue eyed aryan goddesses?

Has anyone here done it?

tips?
>>
>>16947171
How can a grill have parents?
>>
>>16947171
Holy shit that's harsh
Well fuck, tell him how you feel I guess.
>>
>>16947171
You can't change the situation now. You could open up and talk to the boy an maybe you don't have to orbit anymore. Or you treat him like before an nothing will change, as long as you can forget it. Don't cry like a Bitch just because of that
>>
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>>16947180
They asked if they could take a picture of him...when I was sick... I want to apologize and be all sweet and just say my family is close but I'm too autistic and would probably bust out crying from nerves
>>
>>16947171
That's a dick move. I guess you have to sack up and make a move.
>>
Okay, girlies:

Do you generally frown upon dinner dates at a restaurant that serves really messy food?

I really fucking love southern BBQ, and it can get messy. One of my favorite restaurants doesn't even have napkins, they'll have entire rolls of paper towels at each and every table. Also, their smokers are constantly running, so your clothes WILL smell smoky long after you've left the restaurant.

Would you resent a guy who puts you through a literal mess on the first or second date?

Besides sushi, what kind of restaurant would you like to be taken out to on a date?
>>
>>16947195
If that's what it's going to take, just treat him like you normally would. If you sperg out and start crying in front of him things will get really weird.
>>
>>16947195
>I'm too autistic and would probably bust out crying from nerves
You can do it anon, channel your autism powers rather than letting them control you.

>>16946983
To be honest I started being more confident when I started losing weight. When you're big people tend to be incredibly self conscious, and that doesn't mix well with trying to meet women.
>>
>>16947204
I think if you make the girl feel comfortable with eating messy then she'd be okay with it. I live in and and bbq is a must but It's hard to not look like a slob while eating.
>>
>>16947204
>Would you resent a guy who puts you through a literal mess
depends what she is into ;D
>>
>>16947204
Sounds like a bad idea unless she knows what she'd be getting into
>>
>>16947204
I would totally be down for that. But i'm not a "big town girl", so i might not be the right person to ask.
>>
>>16947204
Guy here, but I think it's generally a bad idea to take a girl to a messy restaurant unless you've been dating for a while.
>>
>>16947206
>>16947209
H-He's called me pretty before..
>>
My boyfriend has a peculiar morning routine, something like you'd have seen in American Psycho. He's very high maintenance when it comes to his skin and hair.

He does several face masks in the morning using different products, showers with sea salt scrubs, washes his hair daily and uses a myriad of products to style it.

He looks great, sure, but it's a little neurotic. I don't even do the stuff he does. What gives? Is this normal? It's a little emasculating.
>>
>>16947274

>"my boyfriend wants to look good for me, isn't he neurotic and high maintenance?!"

fuck off cunt
>>
>>16947264
He wants to fuck. Give him the dick.

>>16947274
He is gay.
>>
>>16947264
Then ask him out for a coffee date or something. Worst case scenario he says no, you can't expect anything to happen otherwise.

>>16947274
It's not normal, but at the same time I think you're making it a bigger deal than it really is. Masculinity isnt about looking gruff.
>>
>>16947246
At the very least give fair warning. A lot of girls do a lot of subtle dolling up that will be ruined by messy food.
>>
Girls: how often do you masturbate, and what do you masturbate to? I hear of guys masturbating all the time but girls I hardly ever hear of.
>>
>>16947274

I don't see the problem. I use a sea salt exfoliant on my face daily as well as a cucumber face wash. I wash my hair with organic lemon oil shampoo. Most of my toiletries are for women.
>>
>>16947274
thats very unusual

i give a shit about my hair and use a nice face scrub from time to time, but not that level. how attractive is he? like are we talking 10/10 cause i guess that makes sense, i dont really know though like its very confusing
>>
>>16947274
You say he looks great and maybe that's why
>>
>>16945419
staring
>>
Is it a good thing or a bad thing if a girl tells you that you have soft hands?
>>
>>16947455
Well, did she say it like an insult? If not, it is not a bad thing.
>>
>>16945566
just let it die, y'all ain't even friends
>>16945822
probably doesn't know your name
>>16946191
pancakes are good
>>16946931
start fucking, nigger
>>
>>16947455
I dunno I can't imagine that being an insult. Unless you're some 110lb scrawny pasty lil shit; in that case she's telling you you're girly, which, again, may or may not be an insult to you. I mean I can't imagine a manly man who does real work having silky hands, but I imagine if he did it would be a plus. Who likes crusty hands?
>>
>>16947455
This needs more context.
>>
>>16947455
Do guys overthink everything like this?
>>
>>16947485
I was holding hands with a girl and she told me I had soft hands. I've never been with a girl before so I had no clue if it was a good thing or a bad thing.
>>
we need another thread
>>
>>16947523
Lack of experience often leads to overthinking. Women do it too, it's just that this is a male dominated website.
>>
>>16944713
l o l
>>
GRILLS PLS RESPOND THIS IS EMERGENCY

I have a date with a girl tommorow (its our third) and I'm gonna try kissing her. how does one do this without ending up looking like a creepy shit?
>>
how many sexual partners is considered above average in a girl? does it matter to you?
>>
Where is the new thread?

>>16947674
Maybe 50 for 25 years old girl. It only matters if I want to marry her.
What matters even more is if she is the dumb kind of promiscuous. I knew a 18 girl who got pregnant and had 2 STD already. I wouldn't touch her with 10 foot penis.
>>
New thread: >>16947525
Thread posts: 319
Thread images: 16


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