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Fear of Flying

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Last night I had a dream where I'd gone on a long flight somewhere and once it was time to return home I felt immense dread realizing I had to get on the plane again.

I've flown before on long trips several times, without incident at all, and without fear or anxiety. I'm able to remain calm physically even if, in my mind, I have a sense of unease about things.

Anyway, why do people quote statistics when talking about the risks of flying? What good do statistics do anyone when *they* happen to be on the 1 in a 1,000,000 flight that goes down or whatever?

I'm having trouble grasping this, so maybe someone could explain it. I understand the purpose of the statistics, to explain that you have more chances of being in a car wreck than plane wreck, but to me there's a major difference: in most other modes of transportation, you retain a degree of control; on a plane, you have no idea if the pilot is a guy like the Germanwings nutjob co-pilot or anything, nor do you have any idea about the plane itself, whether it's really met all safety protocols and so on. Flying, no matter what the statistical risks, seems to involve an all or nothing situation, where if things go badly, they will go really, really badly, and you'll have no control. I don't want to die in such a way, so why take even a 1 in 1,000,000 risk in the first place? Someone wins the lottery, despite the odds.

Anyway, this is a legit issue for me, because I have family overseas and I feel bad that I can't visit them or attend funerals or other events due to this mode of thinking. To my way of thinking, it's not worth risking my own life to, for example, attend a funeral, since I might die on the way there or way back, prematurely ending my life, which could have otherwise continued for decades.
>1 in 1,000,000 risk
That's only true for the planes that are still on the ground. Once the plane takes off the risk is of it crashing is much higher.
I used to have this problem. When I was a kid I went on several flights with no incident, but one time I just randomly got a panic attack. I got over it after flying enough. Like any fear the best way to get rid of it is to face it. You already know that it's irrational to fear flying, so just fly enough and you'll eventually get comfortable with it.
Because statistics are highly relevant. It's not our fault your brain doesnt understand how statistics directly apply to you.

A car crash you have a degree of control, yes. But that's also the only thing that dictates the crash or not. You.
A plane crash would require:
Total engine failure
Fly-by-wire failure
Total power failure
Hydraulic backup failure
Pilot failure
Remote blackbox override control

Modern aircraft have the capacity to virtually land themselves in an emergency, and contrary to what hollywood has taught you they don't immediately explode into enormous fireballs on crash landing.
Basically, there are failsafes after failsafes after failsafes.
And even then, the sheer design of how an airplane works means even if all that shit does go down, you're basically just gunna glide down and the body of the craft is going to grind itself into the ground.

Everybody on board would be relatively uninjured, if at all.
Think of it this way, a flight from new York to London takes roughly 6 hours, if you don't want to fly your alternative is to get there by ship and that same voyage by ship would take 7 days!
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