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WhatDo

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Hey guys, need some woman advice/Psychological Advice and shit in general

Put on your reading hats

Basically, married with a 1 year old child. I am active duty military. Pay isn't too bad at my rate but still, we get slaughtered with bills

>Wife can't sleep without TV/Netflix on
>Makes powerbill easily $250 a month
>Internet goes over cap, $100/month
>Never wants to eat groceries we get, always orders food, easily spend $200/month on food
>Christmas, have 1 year old baby, says she doesn't want her to have a small Christmas, spends $400 in 2 days on a few toys, still not enough, wife depressed
>She has extreme manic bi-polar/Depression/Anxiety.
>Smokes like a truck, 1-2 packs a day, $10 a day, 7 days a week
>Spend nearly $100 on smokes every month for her if it's a decent month
>Shes always stressed, never smiles
>Never has sex anymore, shes too depressed
>Sleeps 12 hours a day
>Take care of baby everyday
>She left me on my birthday a few days ago, drank myself stupid and passed out singing happy birthday to myself
>She came back the next day, still pissed off at me
>She left because I didn't want to go to her parent's house on my birthday about an hour drive away
>Tells her mom everything, her mom always talks shit
>Most of the time have $20 after paycheck for paying all the bills, whatever she ran up on the debit card
>No money to eat, at work eating crust from my buddies, or they'd get me a sandwich
>Flashback veterans day, $1 in account because she spent it all on pizza/random shit
>Go to every place I can to find free food for veterans, give her all the food, starve on veterans day
>No food for 3 days, drink only water from faucet to stem hunger
>Lost 15 lbs in 2 weeks from starving
>Just want to see her smile, do whatever I can to make her happy
>Never smiles
>I bring up things we can do to save money
>Currently: She got mad, went to sleep in our bedroom, locked me out, baby still awake screaming
>At my end with all this
(CONT)
>>
>>16595331

>Suicide doesn't seem that bad of an option right now
>Too pussy to do it,
>Wife isn't a bad person, just in her episodes/When she acts immature
>Can't bring up problems to her, will fit, get angry, break shit, leave.
>Baby screaming right now,
>Shes asleep, has been asleep since around 5pm today
>Baby still screaming
>At my wits end, will lose it soon
>Already put holes in wall from headbutting
>Broke door frame punching
>Broke wrist doing it.

I'm losing it, mentally, emotionally and physically. The baby is crying right now and all I want to do is shut it's door and let it do whatever.
>>
First off, make sure that baby is taken care of. Just because you two are having troubles, doesn't mean the baby has to suffer because of it.

Does your wife take medication about her bipolar/depression? Does she not work? Maybe seek a marriage counselor
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>>16595365
Put the baby to sleep. It's not my real biological child.

She takes Xanax, Zoloft and something else.
She doesn't work because her disabilities won't allow her. She's easy to set off in angry rages, will cry at the smallest things
>Dropped a christmas bulb from the store, it broke, she started bawling
We've gone to marriage counciling. Everything was a bit better, she swears she'll be better, she reverts right back to the same self 20 minutes later.

I can't speak, my hair is literally falling out from my head, I shake, I'm starving, I'm alone.

I can't divorce her, I know who she really is and how much of a great woman she is... But this is like a demon I've been dealing with for months and months now.
>>
>>16595365

It's past the point of tears. I sit in a chair all day, take care of baby. Avoid her wrath by just staying silent or agreeing. I don't have any real emotions, just blank. Even towards the child, my feelings are blank. To her they're pretty blank. I know I'm being a depressing pussy, but I do everything to put a smile on that woman's face, bought her a new ring for Christmas, I bought myself socks, first thing I've bought myself in a few months now. Shes still not happy, angry and depressed.

She doesn't sleep with me, says matress isn't comfortable, offer to buy a new matress, says we don't have the money.

I lay in my bed sometimes hoping I don't wake up the next day
>>
Divorce.
Right now.
Why the fuck are you with this woman that only makes you unhappy and is beyond redeeming?
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>>16595378
>I can't divorce her
Yes you can. You're lucky that you're not attached by a biological kid. End it then seek therapy
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>>16595394
>She takes Xanax, Zoloft and something else.
>She doesn't work because her disabilities won't allow her. She's easy to set off in angry rages, will cry at the smallest things
>>Dropped a christmas bulb from the store, it broke, she started bawling
>We've gone to marriage counciling. Everything was a bit better, she swears she'll be better, she reverts right back to the same self 20 minutes later.
>I can't speak, my hair is literally falling out from my head, I shake, I'm starving, I'm alone.
>I can't divorce her, I know who she really is and how much of a great woman she is... But this is like a demon I've been dealing with for months and months now.

She has her moments where it's great. When she smiles or has a good time, I'm more depressed because I know she'll go right back to angry/depressed in a few minutes, making me even more depressed

>>16595400
I've showed up a few days to work at the military where I was unfit for duty.

>93 hours awake
>Jittering
>Tremors over body
>Vomitting
>Stuttering speech

I was sent home on quarters for 24 hours. I didn't sleep when I was sent home by the medics/PA because she started a new arguement.
>>
>>16595389
you've tried your best man, you can't feel guilty. you tried your best 100 times longer than what was fair to do. you need to get away from something that makes your life worth not living. it's not your fault she's not getting better, she wouldn't get better with any husband's help, and be proud you did better than anyone else out there would. really though, i know it's hard. but if you're not okay, you won't be able to be there for yourself, let alone anyone else. you need to do this to be fair to everyone and most importantly yourself
>>
>>16595406
>She's a complete mess
>So I need to stay with her even if it drives me to suicide!
No. Stop being retarded.
Then again you're in the military so I don't expect you to be able to think for yourself.
>>
lay down the fucking law. internet/netflix/tv aren't necessities. quit trying to make her happy, that isn't your job.
>>
>>16595410

I've mulled over it a lot, it sounds gay and corny but when I think about it, I see her smile and hear her laugh when I'm getting serious about it, I pussy out

I haven't been hugged, touched, held hands or even she just pat me on the shoulder.. I can't even remember the last time she hugged me or we slept together.

It's getting to the point where I break down because I feel so hated for something I didn't even do, or something I have no control over. I just wanted a hug for my birthday, I told her that and she walked away from me. I sang happy birthday to myself when she left with her mom, got drunk and passed out

Her mom called the cops on me because we got in an arguement, she slapped and punched me, cops came, asked me if I wanted to have her arrested, I told them no. Had scratches on my eye, didn't want her in trouble because she can lose the 1 year old.

If I had the ability, I could write a book about this all, the thread would 404 from too many posts. I've never talked to anyone about it, no friends, I have no family anymore due to divorce/Fueding sides/Being caught in the middle.

Feels good to share it here, first time I've told 'My story' to anyone.
>>
>>16595416
I can think for myself decently, I do a lot of kind, dumb things for people because I believe in them, even if I'm proven wrong, I can't help it.
>>
only until i got out of my most recent relationship did i realize how foolish i was. i would act out in despair and end up hurting myself because my SO was so messed up mentally. she's one of the greatest people deep down inside that i know, but she doesn't act like that because she hasn't overcome her problems. i realized i set aside any care that i had for myself because i knew she was a good person inside. but if a relationship makes me not care for myself, then it's not fair to be in it. it got to the point that she left me because i was so broken down, and she hadn't overcome her mental problems that she felt better off elsewhere. please anon, learn from me and don't suffer the way i did. it wouldn't even matter if she left you, what's going on isn't okay. thinking back to what i went through and to what you're going through now brings me to tears. i can't let you do this to yourself and i hope i've been able to get through to you
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>>16595331
You've just described the essence of 90% of marriages.

>She has extreme manic bi-polar/Depression/Anxiety.
This is the underlying problem. I think if this is fixed other things will fall into place.
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>>16595440

Makes me feel a bit better I'm not alone. It's hard to give up on someone that means so well and can be as pure as rain but turn to a demon in the drop of a coin. Whats the hardest part for me is seeing her cry if we end it. It makes me second guess when she's a good person, makes me a bit happy but even more depressed because I know it'll turn sour in a second.

>>16595443
Shes been at a psychiatrist for 13 years now. She just gets medicated and hell hath no fury when she doesn't have her medication/when she forgets. I remind her to take her medication and she freaks.
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>>16595426
>Had scratches on my eye, didn't want her in trouble because she can lose the 1 year old.
You should divorce and take custody. Rather have a kid grow with a divorced parent than with parents that constantly fight and don't show any love for each other.

This is going to end badly for all three of you if you don't do something, and you know it.
>>
Also left out a bit of the story...

>Extremely suicidal at times
>Stopped her from hanging herself
>Stopped her from walking into the highway in the middle of night
>Caught her cutting herself with razors when I was in the pool, came up to get a towel
>Used to watch her all day/night so she wouldn't harm herself
>Tried to take the car keys and hit a tree to kill herself
>Tried to jump out of the car on the highway going 70
>Had to wrestle her to the ground in a parking lot because she found my knife,
>People were watching, I was in uniform and trying to restrain her.
>Guy came up and tried to rip me off, elbowed the guy in the face
>Cops came, said I was just doing what I had to, making sure she didn't pose a threat to me and acted in self defense.

These episodes come in spurts through the month, I basically lock the door, hide the car keys, hide the razors, took off the locks in the house.
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>>16595471
I know. I want to talk to her and have a serious conversation, but I cannot due to her either getting suicidal/angry or she'll threaten to call the cops and say shes going to leave. I know it will end badly, she can get help, she just cannot follow through with it, she takes the advice for 10 minutes, everything is great. Then it's back to depression.
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>>16595453
i don't know what else i could say except my story, and i do hope that things will work out. you don't have to cut her out of your life, i didn't cut my SO out even after she cheated on me. you just have to make sure that you can be okay, and aren't over-exerted like you are now. if you truly care about this person, you have to understand that you're only hurting her and yourself by staying with her right now and doing what you're doing. i'm still trying to help what was my SO out with her mental problems, and by not pushing myself past my limit, i can do 100% more for both myself and her every single day
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>>16595471
Your wife sounds like she need to be in a mental hospital, jesus chris. Can't you get her admitted or something
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>>16595484
in addition to what i've said, i should have said earlier that with physical counseling not working it sounds like it's something on a spiritual level. i believe spiritual counseling would be much more likely to help. and if you want i could point you towards one person who i know of that does it and is genuine. i don't know if he's taking appointments now but i could give you his email and website so you could ask
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>>16595484
If we were to end it, I wouldn't want anything to do with her in the least bit, I'd feel betrayed and be so hateful I wouldn't even want to hear or read her name.


The child isn't mine. She was beaten, sexually abused and such with the other guy, he got her pregnant and told her he would kill her and her family if she didn't have the baby.

She had the baby, he tries to fight for his rights to see her. Thus far he's $2,469 behind in child support. He put bruises on the baby and the court has yet to do anything about it. A lot of her anger and stress could come from that whole situation. I can understand that but I shouldn't be the focal point of the anger. I did nothing to her but take her and the baby in, give them food, shelter, everything they could ever have and have never been without.
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>>16595453
>Shes been at a psychiatrist for 13 years now. She just gets medicated and hell hath no fury when she doesn't have her medication/when she forgets. I remind her to take her medication and she freaks.
>>16595476
>I want to talk to her and have a serious conversation, but I cannot due to her either getting suicidal/angry or she'll threaten to call the cops and say shes going to leave.

She's not going to get better, and she's never going to be the angel that you seem to think she is. You have to realize that this is part of who she is, and saying it's all on the illness is just shifting the blame. She's not getting the right help and she's not putting the effort into ANYTHING she needs to be doing. She has you caught in a cycle of abuse, where she'll treat you like shit and get you so low that you want to die. Then at the next moment, she'll make you feel amazing by reminding you how great she can be. It's endless and you're only going to be miserable by staying with her. This is only going to end with one or both of you dead. You need to leave ASAP, because this is going nowhere and you can't help someone that doesn't want help.
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>>16595495
She cannot be admitted to the hospital unless it's self-admitted or an ambulance takes her and a doctor admits her. I asked and tried, trust me.

>>16595496
Shes spiritual or whatever she wants to believe that day, but when religion comes to the point, she breaks down and says shes going to hell and all this other nonsense, then says I'm going to hell because I'm not entirely that spiritual. Her mom literally threatens me if I don't go to church with them. I don't think spiritual is the meaning behind it but she spoke to the Chaplain and was not entirely enthused about it. Thank you for the help though, it means a lot.
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>>16595496
>i believe spiritual counseling would be much more likely to help.
>i don't know if he's taking appointments now but i could give you his email and website so you could ask
You can't help someone that doesn't want to put in the effort. This just sounds like an elaborate advertisement.
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>>16595498
the way the conversation went, i didn't know if she was raped by the way she broke the news so i only knew to ask what happened. after being as nice as anyone could be without worrying about their own feelings (i honestly wouldnt have known what else to do if things hadnt gone that way), i realized i need to learn unconditional love and forgiveness if i want to be a good person and all i hope to be. she has mental problems and acts on them in an immature manner, and i've come to accept her for who she is and still love her just in a different way.
>>
>>16595506
I need to wait for her to wake up (If she does) to speak to her about all of this. I'm 50/50 about leaving. It would hurt me but I do see a silver lining in the picture.


When she wakes up, I'll talk to her about the stuff you guys told me, make some points, have a discussion. I really and truly think this will end with a trip to the emergency room for myself or her, but I'll try.

I'm reading everything you guys say because I've never had any advice or spoke to anyone about this, more of the silent suffering. I can truly and honestly say thank you to everyone who added input, makes me feel not alone. Not being a pussy but you guys showed more care for Anon than his wife did in months.

She can take me to court and take whatever she wants from me, she can have the house and what-not. I have equipment from the military to sleep outside and be homeless, that doesn't bother me. I'd rather be homeless and happy than have a home and be miserable.
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>>16595331
So let me get this straight.
>married to a woman who is ruining your physical and mental health
>wastes all of your money
>literally starving yourself so she can watch TV and eat pizza
>doesn't work
>the kid isn't even yours

You need to take back your fucking house. Cancel the internet and TV subscriptions until she starts working or going to therapy and taking care of the kid. Just sitting around the house and doing nothing is the WORST possible thing she could be doing.

I would honestly open another bank account, and start depositing your paychecks in there so she doesn't have access to it. Give her a monthly allowance- enough to get food and some small things, but not enough the break the fucking bank. You have to be stern and in charge. She's obviously not in a sound mental state, and you've essentially let the inmate take over the asylum. She'll hate you for it, but it's the only way you'll be able to help her. Just letting her do whatever the fuck she wants is akin to letting a heroin addict overdose just to keep them happy.

She's making all the wrong choices for all the wrong reasons, and you have to get this shit in order. If it doesn't work, divorce her and get the hell out of there. Sorry if it sounds harsh anon.
>>
you can help them understand what's going on with their emotions, which may do something. that's all i was getting at. it certainly isn't likely that she'll act on that and help herself if she doesn't change though. and gee, i love this world and am reminded of it every day. be as genuine as possible on here and only advise others when i know what i'm talking about, yet have to deal with sounding like a scam artist because this world is full of them. i really think seeking help in this nature is worth trying for her sake, yet i don't believe it has any relevance to OP having to do what's fair for both of them and end the relationship aspect of their interactions and get enough distance to be able to be okay himself and then help her only as much as it doesn't cause him to suffer (which may be no help if she doesn't change)
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>>16595529
I'd rather it be harsh than make the psuedo 'It'll be okay' conversation.

I try to give her things to do, hobbies etc, she has no interests. She smokes, sits on the couch, eats and sometimes puts the baby in the highchair so I can make the baby food.

I cook,
I clean (Even if she TRASHES the house 5 minutes later)

Anyone want to see pictures of the apartment livingroom we have right now? I own and have a chair in this place where I don't move from. I have a drink, my phone and a laptop with me. Everything else, her mess etc is the entire place.
>>
OP you need to get out of this relationship as soon as possible. This marriage is going to kill you. You can't be blaming her illness for all these problems because it is her. She isn't going to get better because she doesn't want to or have to because of you. I'm not trying to shift blame on you at all. You're a good husband that is just trying to do everything for his wife, and that's an amazing thing. But, in her mind you'll always be there will accept her outbursts, irresponsible behaviors because love and if that doesn't seem to work she'll manipulate you through hurting herself.

Pack your things and before you leave get her mother there so she can watch your wife. You need to stick to your guns when you leave because she will say and do everything to have you stay.
>>
>>16595527
>She can take me to court and take whatever she wants from me, she can have the house and what-not.
She has a family, does she not? A mother? Her family can take her in. There is absolutely no reason why she should take YOUR house, when she does nothing and you've essentially given her your all. She hasn't given you anything in return but suffering. The kid isn't even yours.
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>>16595539
>Anyone want to see pictures of the apartment livingroom we have right now?
Go for it. It'll give us a better idea of what you're dealing with.
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>>16595539
>Anyone want to see pictures of the apartment livingroom we have right now?
I'm interested.
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>>16595546
At this point I'd rather her keep whatever she wants from me just so I can wipe my hands and run. She can take my house, TV, laptop, xbox, bed. I really don't give a damn.
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>>16595527
the fact that strangers show more compassion for your than your wife, and the fact that we're the ones here causing you to not want to commit suicide while your wife is causing you to want to kill yourself really speaks volumes to just how serious this is. i had my love blinders on in my relationship too, and i'm doing my absolute best to help you remove them. and i can't imagine what your place looks like, half of me wants to see what you're going through and the other half already feels so much pain thinking about how you feel inside every day and how i used to feel in my relationship
>>
>>16595498
This shit isn't adding up.
The child is one, so she was with this other guy at least 2 years ago.
So, you either dated and married her while she was pregnant, right after having the kid, or while she was with the other dude. If she had just had the kid, she wouldn't have had time to date.
She's completely irredeemable in every aspect and has had mental problems for over a decade, too.

Explain this bullshit.
>>
>>16595552
>>16595554
Delivering, uploading to laptop.
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>>16595555
You'd have an easier time just making her leave and go to family. She'll have to anyway, to sustain the lifestyle she's grown accustomed to. Anything she owns, just box up and ship to her mother.
>>
>>16595555
the only thing is, not is it only not fair to you, it's not fair to her either. but most importantly it's not fair to you, and you have to do the right things for yourself. we've got your back to help you remember/hold onto/ and realize what they are
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>>16595561
I met her while the child was... 1 month old. The guy had nothing to do with her/baby when it was born, so that was a plus so we were a normal child, I don't call the baby my stepdaughter, I call her my daughter, she calls me daddy.
>>
>>16595569
You know, you could probably win custody of the child if you weren't active duty. With her multiple suicide attempts and obvious mental health issues, it ought to be a cakewalk.
>>
Wait, so you married her less than a year into the relationship? Dang it, OP.
>>
Call your local EPS and have them lock her up when it gets dangerous. Don't call the cops.

Emergency Psychiatric Service.

They will confine her and have a psychologist see her.

Alternatively, you can call EPS on yourself if you are on the verge of going insane.

Had to call EPS on my Elder brother twice. It is much safer than have a loved one going crazy and on the loose.
>>
>>16595574
>You know, you could probably win custody of the child if you weren't active duty. With her multiple suicide attempts and obvious mental health issues, it ought to be a cakewalk.
But then he'd be stuck dealing with her and her family for the rest of his life for a child that isn't even his own. He needs to just be rid of her and the family entirely.
>>
you have to fucking leave man. she too caught up in herself that she can't even recognize your distress. don't have your life wasted away by her.
>>
>>16595576
Known eachother for quite some time, this that and the other. Knew eachother for a good... 3-4 years? Casual friendship/dating etc. That's a whole different demon.
>>
>>16595581
Basically this.
>>
Did you marry a tag chaser from the local strip bar? Military men from /k/ have shit ton of horror stories from idiots who did it to quickly escape the barracks.
>>
>>16595569
So you got married before even dating a year?
And she went from this charming dateable person to a useless crazy slob?
What the fuck mate.
>>
>>16595598
I'll go into the story shallow

>Dated for a good 3 years
>Left for military, we decided to end it because we figured it wouldn't work
>Got stationed in home state
>1-2 years go by
>We start talking again
>Gets a bit more serious
>Talks about the baby, how the guy threatened to kill her, he raped her etc
>Love the baby regardless
>Marry
>Married now for 1 year and a few months

All in all, dated for a good 3
Started dating/being with eachother for another year,
Married finally, now we're 1 year and a few months married. Baby is 1 year and a few months old (1 month older than our marriage)
>>
>>16595564
Still waiting OP, you flaming homosexual.
>>
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>>16595611
Delivering

Her sleeping quarters I call her hive
>>
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>>16595611
The ground floor. You can't see all the ashtrays/cups she uses as ashtrays, theres a good 4 of them
>>
>>16595576
As a military member myself, I have known people who get married with only knowing each other for a number of DAYS. Convenience marriages are extremely common when you're talking money in the military, and they usually last as long as they take to make.

OP, she sounds like your typical dependapotamus. Despite her mental illnesses, she sounds like a spoiled baby who's used to having everything her way and acting like a brat if she doesn't get it. I'd seriously reconsider the relationship if this is how it's gotten and it doesn't show any sign of improving, despite your efforts. Some people you just can't change. She has to consciously stop being a bitch. Either grow a pair and tell her "this is how it's going to be", or drop her. She's manipulating you to build her spoiled life. I've seen spouses abuse the crap out of military members all the time.
>>
>>16595610
During the time you've dated you didn't noice her craziness, or was it not that bad back then?

>>16595617
What the fuck, does she use tha garbage on the couch as a pillow or something?
>>
>>16595626
what would she do if you didn't clean up? she couldn't survive if she had to swim through shit, which i imagine she would seeing as you clean up all the time
>>
>>16595610
So it's not even your biological kid? Your either a saint or a fool.
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>>16595611
It gets worse, you should see the bedroom. You cannot move in it due to her shoes/clothes/papers everywhere. I have my own little nest on the bed where I moved everything away. Shes in there right now, can't enter. The pictures I posted is just where she sleeps, not the whole place. I literally cleaned this place spotless 3 days ago (Had to for court over custody) but I generally have a nice clean apartment house thing. I enjoy clean.
>>
My grandfather was highly bipolar.

He beat my grandma, my mom and her siblings, then when he was 45, he abandoned everyone to live with a harem. My grandma had to live in her car with three young kids for several years.

My grandfather was charismatic, loving, responsible, hard-working, supportive-

He was violent, merciless, hateful, distant-

He was the best dad anyone could have-

He was a monster with no remorse who ruined his children-

Every day for twenty years he was all of these things.
>>
>>16595634
makes me wonder if she didn't have you there to do all her chores and take the emotional abuse, how often she would have to clean up herself and shit. because she would have to, and her being forced to as a result of you being gone may help her become more responsible
>>
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>>16595630
I refer to her with that term a few times. It follows the norm for military spouses
>>16595632
She wasn't as 'crazy' until she had the baby/was with that guy. I think she lays on all of it and puts her feet under the blankets.

>>16595634
When I clean it's not to her standard. Her OCD basically takes over, she ruins what I do, messes it up because she doesn't like the way I do it. Like the xbox games we have, they weren't in ABC order so she threw them on the ground and said she'd do it herself. She never did.
>>16595635
I think both words are synonyms
And one more, don't want to make anymore noise in the house of moving.
>>
People with bipolar disorder can be very difficult to live with imo. My brother is bipolar, he was diagnosed 30.years ago. The med that helped him was lithium. Kept him more or less even. Plus he had some counseling. It was hard on his family too. I've also known bipolar people through a self help group I go to. Some are very difficult people to be around. I think it would help if you got counseling for yourself. And I would try to rein in your wife's ability to spend the household money. Get a seperate account for just you to pay bills from? Maybe set a budget and get her on it. Don't let her have credit cards. Bipolar people are impulsive when manic. The situation may not improve soon but counseling may help you deal with it better.

Also I invite you to check out recoveryinternational.org; they give training on tools to use in daily life for people with mental illness or nervousness. I highly recommend it. Good luck my friend.
>>
>>16595657
Bookmarked the website, thank you very much
>>
>>16595655
What branch are you, OP?
>>
>>16595655
>Like the xbox games we have, they weren't in ABC order so she threw them on the ground and said she'd do it herself. She never did.
>these pictures
What the fuck, OP. Why are you putting up with this?
>>
>>16595331
>I am active duty military
Did your wife's depression start before or after this?
>>
>>16595610

I'll assume that she was "normal" during your first 3 years dating. It appears that during your 2 years absent, something made her go crazy. Was it the abuse and the rape from the other guy? Or is she not normal in the beginning already?

Why do you feel obligated to stay by her side? I don't understand your motivation to keep suffering through this predicament.
>>
>>16595527
Get a lawyer. You have rights.
>>
OP, if you're still around, you should try seeking out a men's shelter. If you reversed the genders in this scenario, you'd be described as a victim of spousal abuse. Just because you're a man and she's a woman doesn't mean it's not abuse. I was in a similar situation, and I know how hard it is to let them go. I know how much love you feel, but it's going to kill you, it's not helping her, and that child is going to suffer for it. You need to get out as soon as you can. I'm so sorry.
>>
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=succubus
>>
Keep us updated, OP.
>>
>>16595667
Active Duty Army

>>16595670
Xbox games, books, pictures not arranged correctly, her stuff not in the right place even though I never touched it. All that OCD stuff. Shit even if I eat something like cereal and it crunches, she freaks the hell out.

>>16595676
Way before, since she was nearly 6-7 years old. She was molested and abused a lot.

>>16595679
Normal as it can generally be. The few spats and all the sort. A lot, I mean A LOT contributes to the custody battle/the guy attempting to murder her/beating her. Seems to have put a faster fire under her. I'm hard headed, I see the good in a lot of people. I remember the good times and the bad get numb, I run off of memories of her.

>>16595688
I am able to stay in the barracks on post. I don't want to tell anyone about anything because I don't want to ruin her life/the babies life.


Sorry about late response, baby was screaming, had to put her back to sleep.
>>
OP here,

I am listening and reading every post, I promise you that. I just have to wait for her to wake up to speak to her. It feels good complete strangers were able to help me/show me somesort of compassion where my own wife would not. Not looking for attention, sob stories, begging etc. Just nice to have someone to speak to about things without lash outs, or her mom threatening me if I don't go to church and 'pray' for myself.
>>
>>16595703
If you tell someone, she may be forced into the help she needs. You need to ask yourself if you are really not saying for the right reasons, or if you are afraid to tell because of fear of the unknown. Is she really capable of raising that baby on her own? My husband was adopted from unsuitable as an infant and he's much better off for it.

If you have a friend, let them know to check on you at a certain time after you discuss things with her, for your own safety. You never know what unstable people might do in scenarios like this.
>>
>>16595703
>Xbox games, books, pictures not arranged correctly, her stuff not in the right place even though I never touched it. All that OCD stuff. Shit even if I eat something like cereal and it crunches, she freaks the hell out.
I think that's less about OCD and more about her lashing out at you to feel good about herself. Any reason at all will do, but if she can make it your fault, then she won't feel guilty.
>>
Shes awake and out here, I gotta go guys. Can't let her see I was talking about any of this/pics.

Told her I was on a website for a game.

Thank you again guys, I'll post an update thread if it goes anywhere. Gotta go. Thank you!
>>
>>16595432
>I can't help it
No, you can, you just won't stand up for yourself so you let her drag you down to her depressive level. Divorce her and go figure out how to lead your life by yourself. She has not progressed in any time you've spent with her so any further time with her is a waste of opportunity towards feeling better.
>>
>>16595717
Do yourself one favor. Get somewhere safe, and call 18007997233. That's the domestic violence hotline. These people are very experienced with situations like yours and will not force you to do anything, but they can offer advice and resources to help you.
>>
>>16595725
OP, follow this anons advice
>>16595728
This isn't even a safe environment for you, for fucks sake. You can't even shitpost on the internet without worrying that this psycho will freak the fuck out. This isn't normal, this isn't acceptable, and this isn't safe. Don't just accept the situation.
>>
File: 4forum.png (19KB, 320x480px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
4forum.png
19KB, 320x480px
Get out now OP.
You married an anchor... start documenting all bad behavior she does or neglect of your child. Because 90% chance she will get custody.. and you get stuck with alimony payments. Which what I think she is after.. so she can sit on her ass and collect.
Get councilling, maybe.
>>
>>16595742
Not his kid, luckily.
>>
>>16595750
But unfortunately he'll probably still have to make child support payments since he assumed a fatherly role. Especially since the kid's actual dad isn't, and he's in the military.
>>
>>16595776
But apparently the real father wants to be in the kid's life, even if he's not willing to give money to OP's wife (but I can't blame him, to be honest, after reading some of OP's posts). Maybe that could help OP.
>>
>>16595776
Fuck, no.
>>
>>16595750
Oh man.. this is one stupid fucking guy.
Just walk away from it all ,brah.
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