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Dating my friends ex

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Hello friends, I'll try and keep this as short as possible. Basically my best friend at the time was dating a girl only to split 6 months ago after 3 years. In that time they were dating I basically lived with them and got to know them both very well. Due to some current lifestyle changes and realising how generally negative and toxic the guy is to be around I've started distancing myself. About two months ago I started seeing his ex and its gotten to the point where we would like to be official but feel guilty thinking about how her ex would feel. We know we can't progress in our relationship without saying something to him and everyone we've told about us so far (5 or so people) have just said fuck what he thinks make yourselves happy, we just cant bring ourselves to do it. So I guess all I need to know is how should I go about this? Has it not been long enough since they broke up? Any advice is appreciated. Also I'm aware it wasn't a good thing to do by him but I feel my life will benefit greatly with her in it. Cheers guys.
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There are literally billions of other girls and you go after you best friends ex he was with for YEARS? No wonder you feel guilty. You're a shitty human being. Anyone that doesn't say so doesn't want to be involved or has done it themselves. I make a rule not to date or even flirt with my friends exs/crushes because surprise there are tons of other guys out there and it's not worth knowingly hurting someone for a fling. Especially a friend. Maybe he's toxic because he just went through a tough break up and his best friend is MIA because he's fuckkng his girl. I have no sympathy for people in your situation and I think it's hilarious when down the line shit doesn't work out and no one trusts you anymore. Those people that said go ahead! Bet they won't actually let you near their girlfriends ever.
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>>16575923
Haha you spent a lot of time writing this, I said I already know it's bad.. he isn't a friend anymore, he was always toxic I just dealt with it until I made some lifestyle changes. The people that said go ahead (her brother, my sister, several of our close friends and our parents) know what he is like as a person (generally negative and treats everyone on earth like they are below him) and know that I will treat her right. Nice try though :)
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>>16575923

This ^

You're garbage op
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>>16575933
Don't come ask for advice if you don't like what you hear. You're trash. Enjoy her cheating on you and fucking you over one day. And no friends left that will trust you since you have no loyalty.
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Should have specified in the OP, I don't care about anyone that says shit like the posts above. More looking for advice on how to go about it because I will regardless. So I dunno waste your time typing out paragraphs on how im a piece of shit if you want but it will change nothing.
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haha op you're an idiot
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>>16575947

You didn't came here for advices

You came here for validation, nobody will be at your side, so fuck off faggot
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>>16575923
you're a shitty person OP. This relationship is doomed to fail because your ex-bestfriend will pretty much always be in your mind even if he moves on. What sort of cunt drops his best friend for some pussy because he thinks he's "toxic" instead of helping him change?

dump this girl and find a new one. Best to start all over.
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>>16575952
I asked in the OP "How should I go about this" because it is going to happen regardless. I dont need validation on something I planned on doing anyway.
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>>16575916
Op why r u such a faggot
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>>16575916
I guess you are below your best friend op since you're riding his coat tails catching his scraps

when you fuck her do you think about the fact his cock has already rekt that pussy? bet he's got a bigger dick than you since you can't even find your own girls
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>>16575958

Ok, here is your advice

>give no fucks and stay with her anyway cuz "muh dick"
>Wait some months/weeks until she cheats/dump you
>Come here again crying like a little bitch that you are, about how heartless women are.

Good luck faggot
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>>16575916
i remember doing pretty much the same thing as you and it was pretty bad. I ended up alienating a lot of my friends because events like these make people pick sides and it pretty much destroyed my friends circle. it sucks because it was such a transient relationship and i lost a lot of respect/friends because of it and i'll never get those friends back. I fucking bawled my eyes out one night because i realized that even if i went and apologized, noone would come back to me.

i dunno op, for some people, it's obvious, and for people like us, we gotta learn the hard way.
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>>16575933
Yeah you're a fucking prick. This is advice, not "post what I wanna hear"
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>>16575986
That is my main concern but there are only really 3 friends tied in with him and they're stoners that sit around doing nothing with their lives so its not much of a loss.
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>>16575923
>>16575934
>>16575944
>>16575951
>>16575952
>>16575953
>>16575959
>>16575967
>>16575969
>>16575991

Haha everyone still seems to have trouble understanding.. I am going to do this regardless of what a few people on the internet say. I'm more interested in what's the best way to go about it? Considering you are all so opinionated you should be able to answer my actual question and not tell me what you think about my personality.
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>>16575992
It doesn't matter if you're friends are tied in with him or not. They are going to think of exactly how we all do. You're an un loyal friend and you can't be trusted. Glad you're friends are so disposable though since you think it's only going to be three of them!
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>>16575992
depends how big your friend circle is but for me it turned into something that i had to live with daily. As long as you dont think that'll happen/ dont mind living like that, the world is your oyster mate. Other than that, if you're a social person, people talk. and they talk shit. A lot of people are going to talk shit about you when you arent looking or think you're a bad person, but you're just learning to play the game. It isnt really your fault
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>>16575998

Its you who is have trouble understanding, there's no best way to go about it on what you are doing, just do it and face the consequences, also stop being so arrogant, you're probably worse than your "toxic" friend.
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>>16576003
I dont think you understand, ive told several of my close friends who are friends with him too and they have said go for it, he will only bring you down, bad infuence etc etc
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>>16575916
Why do you have to tell him? To rub salt in his wounds? Ignore him or ignore the girl you cunt.
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>>16576038
I guess I could do that, I figured if I left it long enough then I wouldn't have to say shit. It was more if I wanted to do it any time soon then saying something would be less shit cuntish
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>>16575944
>girl didn't cheat on ex
>is now single and wants to date another man
>enjoy her cheating on you
How does your mind come to that conclusion?
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>>16576145
Thanks for the moral support haha, she was actually cheated on by him. Probably one of the most trustworthy people I know.
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>>16576158
Honestly I'm not getting the raccoon from some of these people. It sounds like they are projecting their own rage because they wouldn't want to be the person in your friend's position.

Ultimately though, you know everyone involved a lot better than we do. How is your friend going to react? You would know the best way to break it to him. It's going to be awkward no matter how you do it, so I think it's just going to be one of those things you just have to get out over with.

Now does the falling out and you distancing yourself from your ex friend have anything to do with this girl?
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>>16576192
He wont take it very well, like anyone would I suppose. I started distancing myself prior to there being anything between myself and his ex but this has definitely given me more of a reason to cut him out entirely.
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>>16576212
Well, I think to honor what friendship you did have with him, he at least deserves to be told straight up by you in person. If he doesn't take it well, oh well, you were already distancing yourself. Hourly it doesn't lead to him throwing punches though.
Thread posts: 28
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