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Hi guise. Been a while since I've been here but I've

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Hi guise. Been a while since I've been here but I've encountered a pretty (common) concerning issue with my significant other. We've got a good relationship, we trust each other, we're happy. We've got a decent house and decent jobs and a 5 year old kid. We're both 26 and from similar backgrounds. Been together for 6 years known each other for 8.
Last night, I was in our living room watching tv when he went in to the kitchen. I asked if he was alright and he relied yeah, he was quiet though so I peeked around the door frame and my phone clatters on the side as he drops it from his hands. I didn't any anything and he made some stupid attempt to excuse it by saying he's got chicken sauce on it. After a few minutes I picked it up and double pressed my home button and voila. My text messages were the last open app. The text message app I don't use unless my mother is feeling lucky enough to text, which hasn't happened in like a week or two. What's he doing? What's he thinking! I've gotten the hint that he might propose over Christmas which was always what I wanted.. But now? I'm wondering if he was trying to catch me out and doesn't trust me or am I jumping he gun? He could have been looking for something to surprise me. It's clearly bothering me and I'd like to confront him, but I don't want to be a dick if he says he was doing something nice. I've never given him any reason not to trust me but I'm beginning to feel like I don't trust him now.

Any /adv/ would be great appreciated. I'm on side iPhone so sorry if delayed responses.
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>>16575247

He was reading through your texts, because he was worried you are cheating on him.

Is it such a big deal? Do you really blame him?

It's not like he cheated on you or something.

What you do about it is up to you. If you call him out or act upset he will just get more worried, 'Bitch must be hiding something or she wouldn't care so much I just gotta find it'
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>>16575249
Do I really blame him? Yes. I've never cheated in my life and I would never - he should know that and if he doesn't the right thing and the grown up thing to do would have been to have asked me and talked about his concerns.

Is it just me, or is he invading my privacy and acting like a child?
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>>16575247
He probably had a brief moment of insecurity that created a lapse of judgment. He was being retarded and he knows him.

Write this one off and if it happens again definitely talk to him about it.
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>>16575253

>I've never cheated

He doesn't know that.

>Asked me

If you were cheating, you wouldn't have told him, now would you?

Look, he did invade your privacy. Everyone gets worried. He probably has been cheated on before. It is a very painful experience.

If he didn't love you, he wouldn't worry about it.

Show some empathy
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>>16575257
Why is he the victim here? Would you feel he same if I was a bloke and my girlfriend had done this to me?
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>>16575247
>that pic
I know I should care that the government is spying on me but google already watches my porn so it doesn't seem like that big of a deal.
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>>16575286

He's not the victim but this isn't really a serious offence in my opinion.

It kinda seems like you just want a reason to be mad at him.

Can't you empathise? Haven't you ever been worried he was cheating on you? If not you should be because people are terrible and in most relationships 1 person is cheating and you're not cheating on him so I'd worry if I were you.
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>>16575254
Sound advice. This was my first plan of action but it's eating away at me. I've never been compelled to read his so I think it's worrying me more that he does. For the first time it feels like we're not on the same page.
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>>16575253
Look woman, we live in a day and age where cheating is so far beyond rampant, it is almost common place.

You can not blame a guy for being a bit paranoid about things these days.

Maybe something happened (in his head or otherwise) and he wanted to just check and put his fears to rest?

You should go easy on the fella.
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>>16575316
This applies to you too btw. Go thru that nigga's texts if you're worried at all

My ex and I had a thing where we were comfortable going through each's others texts. We even had access to eachother's facebooks. We never lost confidence in eachother's trust.
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>>16575318
But not asking doe? To do it secretly is a shit thing to do.

No offended, you lot are all a bit paranoid and clearly haven't got any faith in other people. Imma listen to the one sane person here and see if it happens again.

I don't need negativity and mistrust in my life. If he thinks I'm not to be trusted, then perhaps he should address his own issues.

Thanks again, peace out.
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>I've gotten the hint that he might propose over Christmas

> We've got a decent house and decent jobs and a 5 year old kid
> Been together for 6 years


You do realize that one day, he'll meet someone he really loves, and propose to her and marry her within 6 months of meeting her, right?
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>>16575423

Trust isn't an absolute thing fucking hell, it is like a rubber band that is strained by suspicious-seeming activity. Anyone who demands that someone simply trust them, is almost guaranteeing to anyone who has a brain that they are almost definitely not to be trusted, because that kind of absoluteness is simply not how trust/reliability work.

Anyway, if you have not cheated on him in any way, then he probably has some problems with his own judgement of you or in general. He has done wrong in invading your privacy by checking your phone, but considering you live together it's, in my opinion, honestly not that bad, and his motivations aren't malicious, so I would say you should try to have an honest conversation with him why he feels he can't trust you enough to not check up on you in this way since you haven't done anything to strain his trust, and let him off the hook for this one infraction (also getting angry at him for this will make you seem very suspicious as it is a common tactic by unrepentant cheaters/tricksters in general). You should be able to have an honest conversation like this with him at this stage in your relationship, and if you can't, you have very serious problems in your relationship that are almost definitely the reason for his lack of trust.
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>>16575423
Just trying to put some perspective in this.
Sometimes its not that you dont trust someone. It''s just that your fear of losing them is so large it overrides it. Like you're in your home, it's secure, logically you know there is no one in your house but you are still afraid to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night

Granted that may be its own sort of problem, but, some perspective. Or he may really be a piece of shit who knows
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Just outright confront him about it and tell him it makes you uncomfortable that he doesn't trust you enough to let you have your own privacy. Tell him you trust him enough to not go through his things without his permission and that you expect him to do the same to you and then reassure him that you would never cheat on him and that you love him.
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