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My dog died a few months ago. I did all I could for him, but I was still devastated. He was a lazybones and a bit of a dummy, but more trusting & loyal than any other dog I've ever had or even met.
I thought I was coping OK, but I just returned home for the holidays (left town after he died for school-related reasons ... and I just had to get out of there) and all the grief came rushing back. I'm lying in my childhood room and every time I shift position I expect to see his head pop up and look at me. I guess I just kind of pushed the grief aside rather than dealing with it.
I really need to talk to someone about it, but I feel really embarrassed and guilty being this broken up over the death of an animal when I haven't cried over a person's death since I was a child. It's not that I don't care; it's just with people, I don't feel it immediately for some reason. It hits me piece by piece over the course of months. With animals it's right there, right away. I know the people in my life will understand but I still just feel guilty sobbing this pitifully over the death of an animal, especially when I'm not really friends with any other dog people, and I think you'd have to be one to empathize with this level of a bond with a pet. I at least want to hug a stuffed animal, but I even feel guilty hugging one of them instead of my dog, even though he's dead.
I guess I'm just confused. I flatter myself to think I usually deal with death pretty philosophically, but this time the hurt isn't diminishing.
Pic sort of related; not him, but looks like him, except less lazy.
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I hope you cope with it soon, but I feel sorry for people who have a harder time coping with an animal`s death than a human`s. I think that it might say one or two things about such people...
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>>16574923
As I said, when people die, I don't feel it for a long time. I don't know why I'm this way. Frankly I wish I wasn't, but I can't help it. I can assure you I love the people in my life very, very much, and I think it's quite low of you to snidely insinuate things about me when my post is literally about how I feel guilty over this exact thing.
>>16574927
I don't feel this post is inappropriate here. It's not advice about an animal, it's "I am uncomfortable with my grieving process, w.r.t. both people and animals."
Thank you both for your replies nonetheless.
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Did you have a Keeshond? Those are amazing dogs.
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>>16574978
Lol, give an example of ONE thing that I have hinted.
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Get a new dog. Talk to him about your old dog.
Second part is very important, because then you'll bond with him properly and not feel as though you're betraying your old dog or replacing him. It was the only thing that helped me when my cat died. I'd tell the new cat about her, say "you know, Sammy used to do that too" and "you're a great friend, just like she was". It still took a while, but wasn't quite so painful once I got him.
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>>16574880
Fuck man that's sad.
Gotta a lil choked up reading that. I'm partial to dogs because fuck cats and I know how it feels to lose Man's Best Friend.
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>>16575032
>I think that it might say one or two things about such people...
>>16575053
I so wish I could. Unfortunately I just don't have the resources to adopt a new pet right now (we got the dog while I was still living with my parents, and the last round of vet bills hit my bank account pretty hard.) This is still good advice though. Thank you for it.
>>16575014
I did! He was a Keeshond/Elkhound mix. They really are incredible; mine saved the house from burglars once. I'm so glad you know them, I really wish more people did.
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Your friend is dead. We lose the ones we love and nothing is going to change that.
I miss my dog. I miss my grandfather. I miss my grandmother. I miss all the people who I've known that have died. I think about them and cry, even though I know they wouldn't want me to. Sometimes it hits me hard, other times it's just passes by like a cold wind.
Death is a part of life. Dealing with death in a way that allows you to live on is critically important to having a happy life. Not "feeling" it is -not- the right way to go; neither is wallowing in it for weeks and weeks. Both are extremes, and both are unhealthy. You have to find your own way to mourn, without going too crazy. Personally, I just need to be alone for a long time. The more I'm alone the more I'm able to reflect on what I've lost. It's painful but it would be worse for me to hold it back.
When I lose someone, usually there's a moment where it really sinks in that they're not coming back. The day my dog died, I went outside and started filling her water and food bowl like I usually do, without really thinking. When I realized what I had done suddenly all the hurt came at once.
>>>/wsg/799910
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>>16574978
these types of posts are on /an/ all the time
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