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NEET and Shut-In Advice Thread (Version 120.5) Almost christmas

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Welcome to the NEET and Shut-in advice thread!
(Version 120.5, running since Oct. 31st, 2013)
REMINDER: This isn't >>>/r9k/ or wizardchan

Drop out of school due to anxiety? Haven't left the house in a few years? Maybe you have a job, but don't leave the house or talk to people for any reason outside of it? Finding a job sure is hard these days.

The best time to change your life was 5 years ago. But the good news is, the second best time is right now!

>NEETmap
https://www.zeemaps.com/map?group=1663835

>Chat
http://chat.mibbit.com/#[email protected]

>IRC help:
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>Conversation Starters and Past Topics:
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>Helpful Links and Resources:
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>NEETworkout:
Tuesday, Thursday 8pm EST -http://s_ynchtu.be/r/neetadv(no underscore)
>>
Old bread: >>16549838
>>
>>
I just accidentally vandalized your Google doc and tried to fix it.

Hope everything is fine.
BTW, the sleep thingy is dead, so I added it's backup wordpress that a ledditor did. If you hate reddt you can remove it, but I thought the link would be helpful.
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>>16547705

;_;
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Arts and craft general? Show and tell edition don't mind if I do
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tfw no gf ;_;
>>
Any advice for people who might start therapy? I don't even know where to start really. I don't have any prior diagnoses but I feel I have some classification of anxiety as it's been strain for the last couple of years and has only gotten worse since I got out of college this year. I hate being a shut-in.
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>>16560879
litterally listen and belive. Therapy wont go anywhere if you choose to hold on your bad habits
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>>16560883
Thanks, I haven't been getting good sleep for the past few months and it's been hard to focus on the positives.
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>>16560879
don't self diagnose, just go for it and let them help you figure it out
>>
night night neets
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>>16561063
The sun has come up. Behind clouds.
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time to review how our years went
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>>16561643

Pretty much exactly like this pic. -_- Thanks for making me laugh though.
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>>16561643
Pretty much the same as last year except worse.

I can actually feel time being wasted at 26.
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>>16560035
>cleft
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>>16561643
I may be a wage slave now, but I havnt lost anything and it only makes me prioritize using my time towards productive means.
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>>16561643
Yeah pretty much this picture even tho I'm ending it in a nice note. Manage to salvage the year around October at least
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>>16562101

What happened to make you feel like you salvaged it?
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>>16561643
Quite descriptive.
But at least we have December to take a breath before the ride begins again.
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>>16562800

I'll take a month of rolling around in the dirt too after everything. Hopefully next year's ride is a little smoother, that last bump at the end of this year's was fucking terrible.
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>>16562842
one hell of a ride though
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>>16562871

It really was, I won't ever forget it.
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regular reminder to leave this place
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>>16562958
I know i know but idk why i came back,

And fuck the cold.
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As a 26 KV where do you go to meet other geeks/nerds? I went to Comic-con (not alone, I'm not insane) but it was kind of a bust, it was mostly kids and other nerds who already had established social circles.
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>>16563003
Comic-con forum. Always meet on the forum first.

>>16562962
It's hot as balls in Ohio today. I've been running my fan for hours.
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>>16563007
Only mentioned Comic-con cos it was local, sorta meant more generally. In London.
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>be extremely sheltered throughout life
>graduate
>this month will be 4 years a NEET
>want to get my shit together
>never been independent in the slightest
>thought of trying to do things on my own scares me
>don't have a problem with driving tho, I like that
>barely any friends

I thought wanting to go my own way and live my life was supposed to feel like some kind of miracle. I had dreamt about if for so long but the idea of it now just seems empty and depressing.
>>
Going to blog for a bit.
>be a NEET for about 4 years
>first 2 years actually tried to college, half the first semester worked just fine
>but the first time I started going less and less because I missed some class so I'm afraid going because I left in studies
>the second time I have to go in a college organization and I'm too lazy to go through with it so I stopped going as well
Until now they stay believed I'm in college, but less and less, and now they want to meet my lecturer.
Should I just come clean with it or should I just keep lying? I'm changed and planing to go to college again next year.

I'm scared of being scolded and shit, especially since I keep being leeching on them.
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>>16563036
You must start little by little. Start with the easiest things.
>>
I don't know if it will help anyone, but here's my story.
> left school and became an apprentice because i like computers and shit
> ended up doing nothing for about 13 months for £2.35 p/hour - incredibly depressed at this point
> got the qualifications and experience but they didn't want to keep me on after my apprentice period was up
> left and tried to find work. was essentially NEET for 8 months
> managed to get into university that september by passing an entrance exam and sitting a few interviews
> i'm now in my 2nd(sophomore?) year, got a first in every module last year, now employed by the university as a teaching assistant
> now searching for an internship placement, was unsuccessful for google but other places are interviewing me

things do get better if you're proactive i guess
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>>16563203
I wish you luck
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>>16563014
Go meet people in the [whatever]con forums before you go.
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>>16560879
don't listen to these guys >>16560883 , >>16560891
They may not be intentionally lying to you but therapy is something that can only help you if you are capable of helping yourself, all it really boils down to is fortune cookies shit: "If you want to be better then be better", "there is no can't", "to help others you must first help yourself" these basic themes will be repeated to you ad-nausem when going through the therapy process, as any therapist worth a damn will admit the therapy process will take years. If you wish to waste years of your life sitting in a room essentially being told the same fortune cookie shit over and over and over again whilst paying for the "privilege" of it, then by all means go ahead, but all things considered you would probably be better off paying that money to a prostitute.
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>>16561643
30yo agoraphobic schizophrenic reportan in:
>first quarter was full of hopes and dreams
>second quarter had abundant hard truths
>third quarter was a bit of a let down due to proximity warnings
>fourth quarter is shaping up to be news worthy
>>
How do you make friends if you are neet? I'm in both employment and education but I haven't made a friend in almost a decade
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>>16564678
Talk to people, make conversation, don't be a creep.
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>>16564664
What's so much better about the fourth quater?
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>>16564678
be likable
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>>16564664
Whats it like being schizophrenic?
My buddy suffered a lot in life and is schizophrenic.
He never talks to me openly and last time I saw him a few weeks ago i saw him at the same liquor store and he drove away with out a word to me and I've been mad, finally gave up on him.
He tends to stay at home and deteriorate. at least when I was NEET I didnt do nothing. I didnt make goals and not go through with them.
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>>16562582
I hired a drawing professor (really fucking cheap, I recommend it) and begun really getting into 3d modeling again. I feel good as long as I'm moving fowards
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>>16563003
Listen, I know you are most likely to invite what I say but does it make sense for someone to make friends with a person who has only seen once in his life? You are much more likely to make friends if you find a hobby or activity you can partake on
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>>16562958
I've been trying for the past month and I still can't. I guess you're in the same boat too. :/
>>
I have a weird ass phobia in relation to job searching and I really freaking hate myself for it: The interview but wait though that part does scare the living crap out of me it's actually the idea of dressing up. I hate how I look that way, the sheer fact that I'm judged because of shit like that, hard for me to have even more confidence and be all fake and shit to play the game being that uncomfortable in those types of clothes etc. it's bad enough being crazy as hell scared of job interviews themselves with my anxiety issues to begin with but this throws gas on the fire. Sorry for seeming like such a fucking twat but I have to be honest and this I guess is the best way to do it.
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>>16565517
It ducks but the alternative is even more shit. NEET life is unsustainable unless you're wealthy so you have to play the game.

Maybe some nicer fitting clothes will help your confidence.
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>>16565582
Yeah true true. I'm mostly just saying while people say looking this way helps with confidence it does the complete opposite to me. Guess it's also anytime looking back any time I would have to look a bit nicer than I normally do (at least according to how society wants to dictate that i don't look nice other times?) they were never situations I look back on in a positive way as far as enjoying myself.
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>>16565619
And in some ways it's also never good enough like even if I go a tiny bit dressy it's oh you had the wrong kind of shirt on because I had a polo on, or shoes on or the wrong kind of pants on. It never fucking ends.
Like why the hell do you people give a shit? And if you do so much should I give a shit about you accepting me because I already know you wouldn't.
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>>16565421
there is no try only do
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>>16565644
It's like well how the hell can I possibly try to "sell myself" when I'm in no way comfortable in myself that way? ESPECIALLY that way. How can I possibly try to fake it even it's just not right. There's no way to stop my nerves
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>>16564683
fruition of time and effort in areas that are important to me
>>16565074
I'm kinda like your buddy, in that i avoid social contact like the plague (anonymous message boards don't count unless i overshare). The problem with the illness is that it has a habit of undermining every relationshit you have in your life unless you maintain it almost every day, and by i mean keeping in contact with the other part even if it's just a hello otherwise the voices always win and will turn the other party into the enemy. Suicide attempts are almost certain in the initial onset then murderous thoughts set in @ about 5 years in (at least for me) but after a certain point it's just about controlling yourself as well as your immediate surroundings to manage the illness. but atleast my gubmint admits it's a problemo and pays me to do some of the above.
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>>16565698

r-right -_-
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>>16565264
I get that, I mostly went there to see what it was like but it was like the first time I saw other geeks/nerds. My area when I was growing up was curiously geek-free.

I did go with people to the con but I wouldn't say they were more than acquaintances.
>>
I didn't get the cinema job.

I'll be alone at christmas and new years eve, what do i do?
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>>16566699
Find another (wageslave) job.
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>>16566699
If will be sad no matter what you do, I suggest getting drunk tho. If it makes you feel any better my extended family wich I don't know just lost a lot of family members and my father's uncle will have to close his family's shop and I'm akward as fuck so I will probably have the worst Christmas of any of here when I inevitably offend someone
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>>16566565
Geek/nerds are a fake identity created by the media, they won't matter in a couple years and it won't make it easier for you to make friends
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>>16566759
yarp they have co-opted it into stereotype, i wonder what the next fad will be, maybe single parents?
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>>16561643
>Things get intense May-July but still on course then suddenly completely loses it in August
Yup!
Turned 25 in February, deep in neet mode since dropping out of school in the fall. Every day the same thing, not going outside for anything, playing vidya, fapping, shitposting on 4chan, going to bed afraid of the future and waking up regretting the past.
Somehow I started gradually taking better care of myself after reading up on self-care, going out just a little more too.
Late May-early June, a very good friend of mine got me to join a gym with him which was a massive change of pace for me. By July I had a great consistent routine going of studying, exercising, was eating/sleeping well. My self image was extremely positive, had goals and shit again, I was looking forward to going back to school, and was especially hyped about looking for a job.
Then suddenly my dad had a stroke in August, big blood clot in his brain stem.
To keep it short for now, it was a terrifying trip but he's doing real well and I've grown a hell of a lot as a person. Never had I taken on such a level of responsibility for even myself yet here I am as my dad's caretaker and advocate.
Right now I feel like that guy on the ground, been through a lot of shit in a short period of time but need to get up, there's still a lot I need to do.
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>>16566759
Alright, where would I find other people with monomania about juvenile power fantasies that aren't complete losers?
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>>16567939
You don't.
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>>16567939
Highschool
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>>16567431
That's not what I meant at all. They didn't co opted shit, they invented it. What they show you isn't an idealized version of something that exists. It's something that never existed at all. You can't find a geek nor a nerd on the streets anymore than you can find a mutant
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>>16567884
You're a strong person anon. I have full faith you'll get your life together in the near future. Sometimes a shock like you felt after your dad had a stroke is enough to put everything in perspective.
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>>16565644
Get someone to buy you a nice fitted suit. Express sells decent ones for the price. That way you always have something that matches and looks good. You can never overdress for Interviews so you might as well get something you can wear to everything.
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>>16565421
>>16565698
>>16566455

Failed again today, maybe you had better luck. -_-

I have nothing better to do on my lunch breaks.
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>>16568784
Err...not sure quite how to respond to that.
I mean, aren't there losers in life that devote huge chunks of life into comics/games ala comic book guy?
>>
Just do DMT it'll solve all your problems, fucc bois
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>Be outcasted and bullied in high school
>Just tried to survive and forgot there was anything called life
>Therefore I have:
>No social skills
>No knowledge of money
>No knowledge of partying

>Fast forward a few years
>First year at college
>Parents refuse to buy me dorm so instead I live 2 hours away and don't have drivers license
>I'm only allowed to be on campus at certain times, purely for classes and nothing else
>My religious brother is constantly supervising my actions on campus
>Everybody else in class is happy in life and partying
>They dont recognize me as a human being

What the fuck am I supposed to do /adv/?
How am I supposed to fix my life when I have no freedom at all?
>>
>>16569979
get a drivers license
get a parttime job and pay for your own damn dorm.
talk to your classmates.
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>>16570000
>driving
The only person that can teach me driving is my father. The last time I've tried to learn to drive with him I threw rocks in his front car window and he hit me.
>job
I don't know how to get one without being able to drive. I don't know how to get one with being able to drive either.
>talk
My classmates told me to fuck off because I accidentally sat between a guy and his girlfriend
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>>16570006
the fuck you throwing rocks at his car for.
literally all your problems have easy solutions, you're just making excuses for yourself
>>
>>16570026
I want to do anything to just live a single free day in my life.

I throw rocks at his car because my dad wants me fucking dead because he has his own mental problems and shit. His yelling and crying is insufferable I find when he's "teaching" me to drive I just want to drive into a wall or off the side of a hill.

I've never had any idea of how to be free I'm trapped in a shitty home and never had any opportunity presented to me because I live in the middle of nowhere isolated with nothing in walking distance.

If there was something I could work towards I would but I don't have the ability to work towards anything because I'm not sane and I can't get basic needs met.
>>
>>16570048
Well you could work toward aquiring some emotional intelligence and towards a hobby. That's what i do.
Try to introspect. What do you feel? How do you feel in what situation? How can you change the way you feel? If you manage to gain some introspection you can try to see what others feel. You can learn how to get comfortable and make others feel comfortable.
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>>16570083
I know exactly what others want. I know they want a guy who, above all else, can get their needs met, and therefore are happy. I don't know how to get any of my needs met. The only want to change the way I feel is if I'm going to get some freedom which I won't get anytime soon. I'm just degenerating on a computer. I know I can work out I know I can learn to play guitar and learn to draw and program, but at the end of the day I'm just going to get so lonely because it's a basic human emotion I can't seem to control so I'm going to end up back here.
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>>16570109
cry some more


babby
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>>16570122
I just came here for advice and I haven't been told anything I didn't already know
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>>16570136
exactly. you already know everything you just dont want to do anything and make excuses
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>>16570140
What is it exactly that I'm supposed to be doing right now?
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>>16570142

What you should do is get your ass to a city or some place that isn't the middle of nowhere as soon as you can. Pick a city and move there, try to get some money from family or extended family so you can survive for a month or two until you find some kind of shitty job to get you by until you stabilize your life.

You do not have a future where you are right now, you have to leave no matter the cost.
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>>16570166
All I know I'm capable of doing is stealing maybe a few hundred and take a car but needless to say I wouldn't get far.
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>>16570179

Set up a gofundme, fuck it, whatever it takes.
>>
>>16570142
stop being a little bitch for starters
>>
http://s_ynchtu.be/r/neetadv

The NEETworkout is still a thing, I'll probably start in 10mins if anyone is interested. I'm not really advertising it anymore but it doesn't look like my workout friend is going to make it tonight and doing it alone is somewhat depressing.
>>
>>16567939
I just thought about a solution to your problem, what you want is to become a videogame developer and join a clike. Those people match. Your description
>>
What's a good way to make income for "NEETs"
>>
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>>16567884
the winter months will be over soon
>>
I got a college acceptance letter in the mail today. If I register, my mom will be paying a $175 registration fee, as well as a ~$6000 tuition fee at some point. If I go through with registering, there's really no turning back. What the FUCK should I do? Being NEET doesn't make me happy, and neither did working a shitty job.
>>
Full NEET here. How do I deal with extreme apathy? I l i t e r a l I y don't care about anything anymore. All I do is browse the internet and take walks. Not because I particularly enjoy this, but because they're the best time-sink I have available. About to lose my mind here.
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>>16571201
Watch this film and embrace nothingness.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3TNurvWW4_0
>>
Went into hardcore NEET mode at uni last semester and ended up dropping out. My mental state is better now that my ED is under control but how do I prevent it from happening again when I go back to school? I'm scared of wasting my time and putting myself further into debt for nothing f.am
>>
i am alone but not lonely
i am friendless but i am happy
i am a worthwhile human being
i am none of what you say
>>
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mfw 3.5 days of solid isolation begins in 3.5 hours
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>>16571925

Are you trying to convince yourself or everyone else? I'm not trying to be a dick either, serious question.
>>
>>16571948
>i am alone but not lonely
>i am friendless but i am happy
not that person but I strongly agree with these
>i am a worthwhile human being
but disagree with this. worth is defined by value and value is defined by supply and demand of which I have none.
>>
>>16571952

If you're alone and not lonely something isn't wired right. Getting by without friends is a little easier but still rough. This is coming from someone who is alone right now btw.
>>
anyone here hold grudges?
I used to be socially active, partly because of my own decisions I became reserved over years, just now I am realizing I need a balance instead of being shut in completely and am working on it.

I just get so mad sometimes cause of friends of the past. Why do they hate me now? Why with out years of speaking do I feel so spiteful?
It gets me through the day sometimes, doing things that benefit me cause I feel in competition with my past.
>>
>>16572281
Friends come and go, holding grudges isn't going to bring them back or help you to make new friends in the future. Try to focus on the now instead of the past. If your old friends make their way back into your life, great, if not then it wasn't meant to be. Don't dwell on things that are out of your control.
>>
>>16569046
how about you eat your fucking lunch phoneyneet
>>
>>16572308
true. I'll run with it.
>>
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>>16561643

Pretty much downhill after March. Fucked things up with a girl thst genuinely liked me, became unemployed again and returned to my NEET life. I just can't seem to hold down the jobs I used to in the past. Had a quarter life crisis in the summer and ended up blowing most, if not all, of my saved money on traveling and drugs in an attempt to run away from myself.

As of December I'm trying to crawl out of this mess so I can support myself and also so I won't be a burden to my parents any more. Trying to improve my health. I'm reading, walking, hiking and basically cut down the substances to maybe some drinks with a friend on the weekends.

A terrible failure of a year, but a learning experience I suppose. I don't intend on repeating it next year. I don't feel like I have much time left for some odd reason.
>>
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I just dropped out for the second time, I'm turning 20 in 2 months and I've accomplished literally nothing besides graduating from high school which was the easiest part of life ever. I don't know what to do I'm pretty much fucked right now and I know things are only going to snowball into worse situations. I brought this on myself I'm a lazy faggot with no will at all to sit at a desk and read my shit for the sake of my future like any other average person does without any difficulty. I can't get off to shitposting and vidya. I'm the only one to blame yet I can't remove this fucking grin from my face. I'm running right into mediocrity and failure yet I can't help but find myself stupidly funny.
>>
>>16572481
become blue collar
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>>16572509
yeah wagecuckholdry seems to be my last options. Construction labor might help me grow up
>>
Apparently I have been so focused on my 3d modeling I lost some weight. Now that I think k about it I have been missing meals and replacing them with just a quick sandwich left and right
>>
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>>16571979
everyone is different anon, as soon as you accept that things get easier.
>>16571948
it is a typing of my own beliefs, so i thought i would put it out there and see how or if it resonated with people here(or not in some cases). Also value at the end of the day is defined by yourself, you may agree or disagree with others' valuation of you and even societies but it ultimately comes down to what you believe you yourself are worth.
>>
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Any advice here? >>16573298

I've actually been neet for 4-5 years now, bad shit happened and had to drop out.

Live with a father that's leeching off my savings and don't know how to get out of it.

I'm afraid the only option at this point is to cut him off for good, go rent an appartment, work any job I can get until I can go back to school and then find a better job.
But yeah obviously I'm afraid I won't be able to pull it off because I've acomplished fuckall in 4 years.
I'm afraid that if I move out now I won't be able to find a job or lose it too soon.

I don't fucking know.
>>
>tfw I might make it
I have two job interviews for Friday. I just hope not to screw both of them up.
By the way, medications have helped me a lot in the past few months. Prozac and clonazepam or whatever are what they put me on. Since I started taking them I have evolved from a borderline hikikomori to going shopping for my family almost every day. Just remember NEET guys and girls, we're all gonna make it!
>>
Being in community college has made me realize just how awful my social skills are. I spend a lot of the time regretting all and any of the few social interactions that I have throughout the day. Just stuff like "why did I laugh like that," or "I probably shouldn't have said this," etc. I want to interact with people normally, but I just dunno how. A lot of the time I just spend the time between classes pretending to listen to music on my phone or staring blankly at the computer screen in the library. The loneliness is starting to hit me pretty hard.
>>
>>16571925
Pretty much bullshit, if you're posting it here, otherwise you wouldn't have posted it.

There's something to be said about being comfortable with yourself but connecting with other people is a huge part of living.
>>
>>16570218
/thread
Start the OP off with this from now on t.b.h.
>>16570640
Quit being a NEET, get a job. Simple.
>>16570836
JUST
>>16571240
>Went into hardcore NEET mode at uni last semester
You're not using that acronym right
>>16572364
>NEET "AND" shut-in advice
>>16573329
believe in yourself, and do it
>>16573335
good to hear anon, I hope you get one of the jobs
>>
>>16573535
>NEET "AND" shut-in advice
neither have lunch breaks.
>>
File: 1270823137873.jpg (6KB, 251x251px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1270823137873.jpg
6KB, 251x251px
>>16573375
For you.
>>
>>16573549
Not with that attitude they don't.
>>
>>16573549
keep wasting away, day by day
>>
Ayyooo, in case anyone remembers me, I'm mopii, used to hangout in the IRC.

Just letting you all know, there's still hope, my life got better, I got hot af, got a gf, finally found a treatment that works for my mental illness, and started a CS degree a while ago. My life has never been better, and I'm glad I didn't kill myself.

YOU CAN DO IT FAGGOTS!!
>>
JUST ANOTHER BLOG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
>>
>>16573645
Pics or it didn't happen
>>
>>16572364

>implying i have a lunch to eat anymore

And even if I did I didn't have time to take a lunch break today anyway. I guess that's one way to finally leave this place. I might even leave before you do at this rate. :|
>>
>>16573645

I'm glad to see you're still alive and doing well mopii. I think a few of us thought you were disappeared by your government. Looks like the exact opposite was the case.
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