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I have no friends but my 1 year gf, we're both 21. We're

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I have no friends but my 1 year gf, we're both 21. We're in an ldr. We used to cam (talk on cam) almost every day all day.

I needed time to study so I took 2 days where I cammed for less time. She met a guy at a chat group she uses, it's a been a week since she stopped inviting me and says she busy when I ask to talk to her. She says she enjoys herself with him than me, she doesn't get upset with him.

She told me today she's giving me space to study and I told her, I've been depressed for a week and skipped all my classes and couldn't study. I told her we should talk before I sleep, just chat, nothing serious. She said Ok.

Just invited her but she said "I'm busy", I asked and she's with him.

1.Thinking of breaking up with her. Why should I not?

2. Thinking of contacting the other dude just to see what kind of relationship they have and if he even knows I exist. Why should I not?

I have no one to talk to...
>>
God you're pathetic. Have you even met this girl irl?
>>
you never had a girlfriend.
you definitely don't now, go ahead and tell her.
how you going to bother some stranger about him talking to your ex-pretend-girlfriend? don't
>>
>>16539901
>1.Thinking of breaking up with her. Why should I not?
You should, by all means. She wasn't serious about you, and at the first sign of you needing time for yourself, she jumps to someone else because she can't stand being alone. She's a miserable person.


>2. Thinking of contacting the other dude just to see what kind of relationship they have and if he even knows I exist. Why should I not?
Only do this if you plan on leaving her anyway--she'll be furious with you, but it'd give you closure and a fair warning to the new guy.
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>>16539906
I know. Anyway we have, and she has spent more money on me than I on her desu. She has not been taking advantage of me. I can say with a great degree of certainty that she loved me or at least loved being with me and was extremely affectionate and kind to me.
>>16539910
He seems like a nice guy. Just want to talk to him, not a big deal.
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>>16539916
what the fuck is closure. why do you believe in that.
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>>16539921
>He seems like a nice guy. Just want to talk to him
>just to see what kind of relationship they have and if he even knows I exist.
pick one
>>
>>16539916
Don't really want to warn him too much. I want to understand what lead to all of this and what has been happening.
And not sure really what I'm planning, I got used to not having friends before her so if I break up with her I might end up an heroing.
>>16539924
Don't see what's contradictory.
>>
>>16539901
>1.Thinking of breaking up with her. Why should I not?

Because she's already broken up with you, she just hasn't told you yet.

I always laugh when I see LDR taken so seriously by people who've never met. The whole internet romance thing is so fluid and open to interpretation. The movie "Her" has an excellent depiction in this quote I took from
http://thinkprogress.org/alyssa/2013/12/28/3095861/love/

>In a wrenching conversation towards the end of the film, Theodore tries to come to terms with Samantha’s capacities. “Are you talking to anyone else right now, other people or OSes?” Theodore wants to know, and when she says yes, “How many?” “8,316,” Samantha tells him. “Are you in love with anyone else?” Theodore pushes forward. “How many others?” “641,” Samantha tells him. “It doesn’t take anything away from all how madly in love I am with you…I still am yours. But along the way, I became many other things too, and I can’t stop it.” It’s an impossible concept for Theodore to grasp, but that doesn’t mean that Samantha is lying to him.
>>
>>16539923
>what the fuck is closure
Finality. Some people need it to move on and some don't.
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>>16539955
We have met, she's come here, I went there. We had fun.
I've asked her if she wanted to break up. She said no. She might not be honest but still sends me tons of kisses and hearts through text almost daily. She even let me stay while she talks with him. (which makes me feel like a kek but understanding this is just far too important for me)
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>>16539953
>I want to understand what lead to all of this
She jumped to some guy that won't let real life responsibility get in the way of her getting attention. That's the hard part about LDRs. You never know the person behind the screen, only what they choose to share with you.
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>>16539973
>I've asked her if she wanted to break up. She said no.
Why would she? She's getting the best of everything.
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>>16539984
Is she? She's barely getting anything from me right now.
She knows I could easily talk to the other guy. I actually even have since I sometimes go to the same chat where they met. I think at most she's probably into him and lost interest in me but she's in denial.
>>
>>16539996
She's probably into him but still attached to you because of your history. She's not willing to let go of either.
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>>16539996
>She's barely getting anything from me right now.
> I told her, I've been depressed for a week and skipped all my classes and couldn't study.
Oh, yeah. She has no hold over you whatsoever...

Dude, just move on. She already has. She's only seeing how far you'll follow, at this point.

You won't gain understanding by teasing this situation apart and having everyone explain themselves to you. You'll gain understanding by moving on with your life, seeing similar situations from the outside, and getting perspective.

Many here have been where you are. I suggest you listen to them.
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>>16540043
What kind of hold? I feel really weird talking to her so I haven't been thaat chatty through text. Just ask to cam with talk with her but less and less.

Thanks for the advice though, seriously. I'm just trying to better my perspective.
My current situation is better for me short term. Long term, unless there's a gigantic change I know it isn't.
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I sorta know how you feeling bro. I was in a similar situation and I just got really sick of my exs shit. We had been growing apart for about a month or two. She tried talking to me one night and she could tell something was wrong so I just laid it all out and told her I'm not happy and asked why are we still together. She asked if I saying I wanted to break up and told her yeah. She was ok about it and that was that

She tried getting back with me a few times, but I shut her down every time because I remembered how unhappy I was with her

Sometimes you have to do what makes you happy anon
Thread posts: 18
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