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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

This is a blue board which means that it's for everybody (Safe For Work content only). If you see any adult content, please report it.

Thread replies: 317
Thread images: 13

Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.

Avoid asking these common questions:

>Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself?
Yes. Stop overthinking this.

>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it.

>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.

>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing

>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.

>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>

>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking

>Brandon or Female Brandon
Piss off.

>Frog
Also piss off.
>>
For both genders: Is marriage possible?
I'm finding it pretty fucking hard to believe with the divorce rates. You either have someone who cheats, marry for money, or fail to get a divorce because they're too far down the road, and have marriage benefits.
Does anyone here want to get married? To those of you who are married, how are you doing?
>>
>>16539025
This is going to turn into a shitstorm and derail the thread. Please make your own thread if you want to discuss marriage.
>>
>>16539025
I'm a guy who recognizes that not everyone in the world is me, which makes it much easier to understand why others might legitimately value marriage. All too often I see people who categorically shit on marriage being really ignorant of why people around the globe get married and how those marriages go. Of course problems can happen. Life is not defined solely by the risks, but the benefits to which those risks are also tied. Benefits vary dramatically from spouse to spouse, couple to couple. For that reason I have no concerns about the tradition of marriage enduring.

As for myself, I don't have a personal motivation to get married. That's not to say I won't in the future. I think that very basic line of reasoning is how anyone should approach marriage. Consider your internal and external influences.
>>
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How and when to go in for the kiss?
>Like, what do I say just before it?
>>
TLDR; what do to get a guy to last longer in bed?

I started dating someone whom I really like. He told me he hasn't been with a girl for a long time, which may be part of the explanation. Whenever we try to do the deed, he finishes way too early. Think foreplay early. The window where he is hard enough to penetrate, but not quite orgasming yet, is absurdly tiny.
Now, I like him enough to not get hung up about it, and it is rather charming that I turn him on this much. However, I have a hard time orgasming from clitoral stimulation so I just really want him. I do not know the male anatomy well enough to know how I can help him in this. Please /adv/, some of you have to have some advice.
>>
>>16539078
This doesn't sound like an anatomy problem per se. The dude is just getting way too excited way too fast. What can you really do except not touch him at all? It would probably end up exactly the same way.

Get some toys he can use on you. If that's not enough, I don't know what to tell you. It doesn't sound like sensitivity is as much of a problem as him getting way too excited.
>>
>>16539067
you dont say anything. and ESPECIALLY dont ask if you can kiss her.
>>
>>16539092
Wow, way to represent rape culture. Ever heard of positive consent? Diving onto someone's body without permission is assault. Someone should sterilize you while you sleep.
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>>16539096
asking if you can kiss her is THE lamest thing you can do before kissing her. if you're on a date already, and shes shown interest and you've escalated touching, she will welcome the kiss. if she doesn't, fine, honest mistake. you were on a date and thought she was into you. Whatever
>>
>>16539086
The thing is that I don't want to use toys (at least not the vibrating, instant-pleasure kind) because I'm very sensitive and I don't want to lose that. It probably is the reason I can orgasm from penetration alone. I could ask him to stick it to me with a cucumber but I'd feel pretty bad about that, I guess. Do you think it will get better if we keep trying? It's only been like five times so far, maybe the novelty will wear off one day.
>>
>>16539121
Get him to jerk it before you guys fuck.
>>
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How do you kiss someone? Asking for a friend...

In all seriousness I have no idea, after being a very nervous shy kid I've finally started to date someone, I am terrified of the idea that I will fuck up trying to kiss her. Also what is an appropriate time to make a move? I have 0 experience with any of this. I guess just general advice would help thanks
>>
>>16539107
>honest mistake.
What a convenient way to say "I'm just going to make any assumptions I want so that I can make use of your body." I bet your escalated touching is done without asking too. Is there anything you ask her feelings about or do you just treat every girl like a sack of meat?

If rape culture is cool then any decent person would gladly be lame. Being on a date is not consent to kiss. It's not consent to anything. The only honest mistake here was your birth. I would beat the shit out of your right now if you were here.
>>
>>16539107
Agreed 100%
I've never once asked to kiss a girl, just go for it

Also I fucking HATE the phrase "rape culture"
The Egyptians have culture, the native Americans have culture. Rape, does not.
>>
>>16539121
You can use non-vibrating toys just to simulate the fullness of him being inside of you. There's nothing bad about that if it works.

Your current situation is just untenable and, no, I don't think it's going to get better if you keep trying. I'm not saying he won't improve as he gets less stimulated by sexual stuff. My real concern is that you two won't last long enough together to see "one day" happen. It doesn't count as getting better if the damage to your relationship grows faster than his acclimation to erotic stimulation. The longer you stay disappointed with bedroom activities, the worse it'll get.
>>
>>16539067
The first kiss is always a gamble, and asking for it will not help, in the most positive case draw her a bit to you, in a negative case push her away.

Signs that it's good to go for the first kiss:
> being close to each other
> talking and suddenly interrupting
> touching each other (hand, hair, shoulders)
> prolonged eye contact

If you manage to pull it off, you'll be rewarded with some good memories to last.
>>
>>16539107
I agree.
Never ever ask to kiss me, that's just embarrassing.
>>
This is for bother genders. What do you think of a guy whose considering losing his virginity to an escort or hooker just because he doesn't want to go into relationship sex completely inexperienced ? Wouldn't it be easier to tell them to get a tenga egg or one of those fleshlights? I mean, even Amazon sells that shit.
>>
>>16539358
Absolutely degenerate
It's not like it's that hard to pick up a girl, at least if you're handsome, like me
>>
>>16539397
They say confidence is the biggest factor when it comes to dating. how can I get confidence?
>>
>>16539422
Lifting will help, but really you just have to force yourself to try and accept that there's a decent chance you won't succeed
>>
>>16539358

Kinda pathetic.

Anyway, given that random hookups are pretty much totally different experiences than relationship sex, I imagine paid sex is even FURTHER removed from what it feels like to be with another person (I've never paid for sex, but I've definitely had some inanely empty and meaningless hookups).
>>
>>16539438
Interesting. What kind of "lifting" did you have in mind?

>>16539397
>>16539441
Your logic is sound, I like those responses.
>>
>>16539422
In psychology, tricking yourself into believing your confident will do the trick. People will see you as confident and so will you.
If you're meeting people, don't be afraid to say shit, to overreact and stuff. If you want to look confident in front of people knowing you're not. Go slowly, act like you weren't laugh and shout some stuff to show that you're not as afraid of people.

And if you're talking about confidence in love, or to ask someone out, you'll just have to do. Move your ass, we believe in you.
>>
>>16539486
It's kinda hard to want to approach people when the life style I lead is less than glamourious, I'm 26 about to become 27 and I have less than 1000 dollars to my name, a seasonal job I may lose in January, no driving skills, no cooking skills,no survival skills whatsoever and live with my aunt.

These past few weeks I've been working this job I have now,tho have really made me feel good about myself, despite there being no skill in what I do at all and that I work half the shifts everyone else does.
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>>16539025
I think so. Divorce rates drop off with income, education, and stuff like that. That said I would only get married when I'm ready to have kids.

>>16539358
I'd consider him foolish. A hooker is there to please you, it won't teach you anything substantial.
>>
On the kissing note, should a girl wear lipstick on a date or not? Looks hot, but will it deter the end of the night kiss?
>>
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>>16539483
>What kind of "lifting" did you have in mind?
You know, squats and stuff
>>
Every once in a while, the girl I'm dating sends me messages like "I'm not feeling too well", "my head feels heavy", "I'm really tired". It's all part of a mental condition she has, and every once in a while she's under the weather pretty badly because of it.

How am I supposed to respond to these? What would cheer her up?
>>
>>16539397
>see this
>two replies
>thinks its of people telling you off, but it's actually two valid responses and reinforcements.

I like this board. Here's a question, though:
>how can I tell if the girl I love likes a boy she hangs out with a lot as a friend, or as a boyfriend?
>>
How do you tell if your male friends likes you as more than a friend?
pls send help
>>
>Men

How come I keep reading that women are worthless after a certain age... and yet my mother-in-law, who is now in her early to mid-50's, still get marriage proposals from guys she dates? (She is divorced) She is not a supermodel, in fact she is overweight, though she used to be very good looking back then.

Just wondering.
>>
>>16539559
Does he initiate conversations often? Does he compliment you or flirt? Does he ask a lot of questions?
>>
Girls, is it a dealbreaker if a guy's life is empty?

Let's say he looks good, his personality is witty and caring, his interests are all over the place and he knows something of everything. Then there's the contents of his life: no job (yet); part-time education; going out on his own every once in a while because his 'friends' are really just very distant old acquaintances he barely talks to and never meets with; mostly just practicing his interests at home, really.

The girl I'm dating knows only half of it, and she's already giving me shit (in a banter kind of way) about my lifestyle, calling it a bed of roses. Her life's practically the opposite: struggling to make ends meet; getting pushed around all the time; an education she literally has to spend days and nights on just to get by at C-level; a busy schedule that has several points every single day; and no time for her interests at all. We haven't dated in a while either, by the way.
Anyway, I laugh it off but I'm afraid that soon she'll take it serious and see it as a complete turnoff.
>>
>>16539577
It wouldn't be a dealbreaker for me, because my life is very similar. But hers is at odds with yours. I think she'll grow to resent you.
>>
>>16539570
Who knows. Maybe she has an amazing personality that manages to outweigh it. Or she isnt too picky with the men she dates.

Besides, not many people would actually argue they're worthless, its just that their market value drops as their fun bits start to sag and their eggs dry up.
>>
>>16539582
Yeah, that's what I was afraid of.

I'm helping her out a bit in making ends meet and such. Small favors, but a lot of them. Think it'll soften the resentment for our differences?
>>
>>16539583
>Maybe she has an amazing personality that manages to outweigh it.

Well, her two sons (obviously am with one of them) complains about her being very feminist-like, too loud and brash, and I obviously met the woman and she seems very... I don't know, threatening? She definitely is arrogant because she is Hitler's wet dream: Blonde, blue eyed, good educational background, etc.

>Or she isnt too picky with the men she dates.

Her last one was a rich man, apparently. Wanted to marry her. She fleed for some odd reason. Said she's too good for marriage at this time.

I don't know. I just thought women only have until 25 or 30, and then no man wants them as a serious girlfriend or wife anymore.
>>
>>16539576
I'd like to say we initiate conversation equally, we're quite good friends.
He never really compliments me I think. He jokingly tries to set me up with his friend a lot though, not sure if that counts as flirting.
He doesn't really ask questions a lot as part of conversation, not a noticeable amount anyway
>>
>>16539577
For me, complete deal breaker. Because I've dated guys like you. They always start to revolve their lives around me and I start to resent their lack of a life.
>>
>>16539507
>On the kissing note, should a girl wear lipstick on a date or not?

Never thought about it or had it be a real concern/deterrent. I remember there was this moment after my first kiss with my GF because because I realized I'd pretty much eaten all her lipstick.

Don't a lot of girls tend to use smear-proof lipsticks anyway?

>>16539570
How come I keep reading that women are worthless after a certain age...

Because you're on 4chan. Take all the hating with a grain of salt, because that's the skew that 4chan has.
>>16539559
>how do I tell if a guy likes you
They ask you out on a date. If they don't, then who gives a fuck

>>16539534
>how can I tell if the girl I love likes a boy she hangs out with a lot as a friend, or as a boyfriend?
you ask her if she's seeing anyone. Also, if you're not the person she's at least dating, you don't love her. Stop being dramatic.
>>
Guys, is it ok to ask your boyfriend to look for a missing tampon?
>>
>>16539618
Why not just check yourself?
>>
>>16539629
Can't get in there properly. Someone needs to do it from another angle.
>>
>>16539596
Hard to say. If she's really proud, it might make it worse that she has to rely on someone who doesn't work as hard as she does. But she could see it as a willingness to share in her struggles.
>>
Men,
How do you feel about a female owning a dildo? I don't have one, but I've been thinking about saving up for something from Bad Dragon because they seem enjoyable. I'm also a virgin, does that make it worse?
>>
>>16539657
Nothing wrong with owning a dildo, being a virgin doesn't make it worse.
>>
>>16539657
Wait hold on, do you have a BF? is it an issue with him being jealous that you'd rather fuck a dildo than his cock? Because I could see that being an issue. Otherwise, I really don't see the problem at all.
>>
>>16539657
Nothing wrong with that, though I would be bit put of if the first thing I see going to your apartment would be a massive horse cock.
>>
What do I have to do to maintain a girl's interest while texting. I hate texting and usually just ask girls out so I just leave it until we meet up and then after the first meet it's nice and natural at least

Girl seemed interested when I met her on Friday, but it's totally petered out and I haven't exactly been hassling her. She says she's busy until near the weekend then she said ask again

Should I bother to try and keep her interest through the week? I feel like I should because its such a long gap. Advice for the future on this even if it's lost on this particular occasion?
>>
>>16539657
Just letting you know, I have three Bad Dragon dildos. Some advice for a new buyer:

- The "onesize" dildos are fun, but be mindful that they tend to be either super long or super thick.

- If you're torn between small and medium, get a small. I just received a medium David for my birthday and I have no idea how I'm going to get that thing into me

- Shop the flops. The flaws on most of the toys are so minor, you won't notice them unless you're actively searching, and you get a great price on them
>>
>>16539667
I've heard many men say they dislike it, but I wasn't sure if that's just an /r9k/ thing or a common opinion.

>>16539682
No, I've never been in a relationship. I just wasn't sure if it'd be weird if I lost my virginity to a dragon cock.

>>16539683
Only a little one.
>>
>>16539657
I'd be turned off if I found out a girl I was interested in liked huge dildos. I'm just an average size guy, so I'd figure she's used to that big dildo and I'm not going to be enough. That's just me and my penis envy, but I think a lot of guys who aren't hung would feel the same way.
>>
>>16539701
If that's the case then I really don't see any issues with it being very weird.

Honestly it shows that you're kinky and have a good sex drive, which is hot as FUCK.
>>
My new gf has been in 3 previous relationships so I'm guessing she's had sex at least 100 times

I've had sex one time in the last 7 years, probably 10 times total in my entire life

How does this even work? She told me she likes rough sex and I don't even know where to begin in terms of being able to do that. She says sex isn't about how "good" someone can do it, for her, and that its amplified by how much she loves the person she does it with and that's what makes it great but..

Even then I feel like I'm gonna be painfully bland compared to her other partners.

Is there like a fucking video tutorial on sex
>>
What's a good way to ask a girl for nudes?
>>
>>16539723
Probably over 100, seeing as girls often have sex with men out of relationships as well. That's when they go for the bad boy/ONS/not bf material but would be a good lay type.
>>
>>16539713
>insecure.jpg
>>
>>16539657
>bad dragon
I don't mind her owning a dildo, but those things are the size of a forearm usually from what I've seen. If you get something like that, yeah I'll be a bit uncomfortable. Otherwise I wouldnt really care.

>>16539618
Sounds kinda weird but not a big deal. I'd be more likely to laugh about it than anything.

>>16539737
I've seen those things man, you could shove your whole arm up to the elbow for the same effect.
>>
>>16539121
Tell him to watch some porn so he gets less excited and desensitiv
>>
>>16539737
Not insecure, just saying if she's a girl who likes thick, long dildos I'm not gonna size up to that, so of course that's gonna turn me off.
>>
>>16539734
Nah, she doesn't fuck randoms or have occasional sex, she's very relationship oriented and has been in relationships since she was 16. Only 3, before me, the last ending a year ago. That's besides the point, I know, girls are whores blah blah whatever but I just need to know how to not blow it in bed
>>
>>16539750
You'll probably blow it in bed. Just laugh and say it's been a while and then go for round 2.
>>
>>16539752
I was thinking of cheating to gain experience but that isn't really logical considering I'm in a legitimate committed relationship. Alright though
>>
I am a guy got a question for the girls here.
Imagine we met at a Party and you really like me and i showed you that i like you too.
Would it be a good idea to tell you that i am in an open relationship or should i keep this to myself?

Really like her and want more and I know she feels the same. What do?
>>
>>16539806
You should tell her, it's unfair on her if you aren't honest.
>>
Girls: Do you find bald guys attractive?
>>
>>16539806
You should tell her you dingus. I don't give a shit about what consenting adults do with their own free time, but by hiding that shit from her you just make it obvious you know she won't be cool with it.
>>
>>16539507
If it looks good on her, sure. So what if he gets a little on his lips? That's what they make napkins/tissues for. You're not Poison fucking Ivy here.

>>16539559
He puts his dick in you, or at least tries to.

>>16539618
Only if you let him wear a hat and carry a whip.

>>16539657
I don't care.

>>16539730
Presumably you were asking girls here but I'll chime in anyway. You turn them on. Then you ask to see how sexy they look. If they feel sexy (because they're turned on) then you have a chance of actually getting what you asked for. It's very straightforward, if not always easy or reliable. Girls send nudes to guys who make them feel sexy.
>>
>>16539806
Even if you don't tell her, she'll find out eventually.

>>16539825
No.

>>16539687
Ask her how her day was and if she did anything interesting. Comment on said interesting thing. Go from there

>>16539577
Yes. I don't want to be the one constant in your life, it opens up the possibility of you becoming dependent on me

>>16539570
Because 4chan is full of bitter virgins who think that they're magically going to become pussy magnets once they're older and women are no longer as desirable, so they have to settle for men they once rejected. It's a fantasy that keeps half this board going

>>16539507
You can always just wipe it off

>>16539525
Go around with some chocolate or something to make her feel better, you dork

>>16539358
In one word: pathetic.
>>
>>16539818
>>16539827
Okay
But what if she is not interested after i told her. I also don't want her to feel rejected.
Would you date a guy who is in an open relationship?
>>
>>16539840
Why are you talking like you're normal and not a freak? Normal people aren't polyamorous and in open relationships
>>
>>16539844
It wasn't my idea. my gf came up with it because i moved and we now don't see each other so often.
But i actually enjoy to be free and meet new people. I only don't know what to do then. I guess it is a turn off to most girls.
But i really need someone to be close with from time to time
>>
>>16539834
>Ask her how her day was and if she did anything interesting.
I have been doing just that, got tons of replies yesterday but nothing today after the first response. Just made light jokes and said her dad owning a bar is really cool. She doesn't sound busy tb h but whatever

I'm thinking of maybe just texting her again on Wednesday and trying to arrange the date again

It's just the gap man it's too much for someone I haven't had a first date with, I don't want to ask her a bunch of stuff by text message when it's much better to save it for an actual date imo

But yeah I dunno whether I was really feeling it at all today. I hate texting I just want to actually talk, text talk is fucking frustrating
>>
>>16539825
No, but I also have a thing for guys with longer hair. So I'm not sure if that reflects the general populace. From what I understand it helps if you have a beard, rather than being totally hairless.
>>
How do I ask for a pic of my friend's boob(s)?
>>
I want to have sex with my gf, but she's always out of town for family related shit. She'll send me sexual texts, but then when I'm actually with her she's rarely in the mood. She's always stressed out and wants to be alone, or I start coming on to her and she worries I just see her as someone to get off with.

It's been more than a couple weeks since we've had sex and it's making me frustrated, and kinda worried it's because of my inexperience. I was a virgin before I met her and we've only done it a few times. But I really want her and she just hasn't seemed interested lately. What should I do?
>>
>>16539657

If I started dating a girl and found a dildo in her room, I'd think two things:

One: Its funny. Because it is. Have you seen the American Pie scene with Stifler running around the house with a dildo he found? Its a god damn fake substitute penis. That shits funny

2. I'd be kinda turned on. Not strictly by the dildo itself, but by the thought that this girl pleasures herself with a toy and is sexually expressive. I can get on board with that
>>
>>16539950
I don't think you'll be able to get boobs from a friend. But you can try the following:
>Introduce a sexual context to the relationship, start flirting or sexting with her, get her in the mood first.
>Girlfriend her first. You're friends so you must like each other, and I assume you're attracted to her, so why not?
>Stalk social media for bikini photos, if nipples aren't necessary.
>Outright ask for the boobs. If she's slutty and/or you're both very comfortable with each other, it just might work.
Bear in mind that I've never asked for boob pictures or been asked for them. So I don't really know how it works. But I honestly cannot think of a sneaky way to get a photo of her boobs, you'll probably have to play her emotions.
>>
>>16539950
Send her dick pics, and ask for something in return. Use different angles if she says no.
>>
>>16539025
Of course marriage is possible. Like the other anon said, when you take out all second marriages, poverty, no education, lots of previous failed relationships/promiscuity, kids before marriage, drug use, young age, ect. The majority of those remaining marriages are absolutely successful.

That being said, I don't think I'll ever get married. I don't see the point. Having the government involved in personal relationships is something I'm very against and I don't want to support that. HOWEVER, I absolutely want the traditional, life-long, monogamous, "marriage-type" relationship, just without the legal marriage. I might miss out on things like tax benefits, but that's worth it to me to have my relationship and love not entangled with the law and courts.
>>
>>16539358
I would not date a guy like that
>>
>>16539358

My personal rule for paying for sex was

>Lose v-card the old fashioned way, then you can pay for as much as you want who cares

Now that I have lost the v-plates, I want it even less. It seems so stupid and detached from the idea of actual sex, its a con preying on men's sexuality

Sex with a random is about hormonal, instinctual passion. Raw emotions where you just both want nothing more than to fuck each other

Thats enjoyable

Sex with someone you care about is about intimacy, forging a deeper connection, AND with a lot of the same base hormonal urges of a random hook up

Paying for sex is just... Nah
Negative ego boost because not only does the girl not want you, but you've had to fall back on money to get laid
No connection with the girl

Its just shit

Never mind the risk of STIs and shit
>>
>>16539861
kek
>>
>>16539078
Get him off before you fuck, work it into your routine. Maybe a blowjob or hand job first, then take a break, then have him perform foreplay on you, then sex.
>>
>>16539025
I believe Marriage is entirely possible, and a good thing too.

I also believe that people either:
>Get married too quickly
>Don't work on their marriage actively (sort out issues)
>Lack of communication
>Sex life diminishes

People seem to get divorced so quickly and so eagerly. I feel like a lot of marriages would last a lot longer if people actually decided to talk to one another and work on their marriage to keep it on track instead of falling apart and becoming bitter towards each other.
>>
>>16539861

Are you and your girlfriend not aware of this fabulous new concept, the kids these days are calling it "breaking up" I believe
>>
Men and women:

I'm a guy and I've started to fall hard for a girl who's already in a committed relationship. She's been with him for nearly two years now, but they're long distance and she sees him maybe once or twice every couple of months or so.

I'm chasing her, but I'm keeping it subtle.

Am I a massive cunt? Should I stay away? I can't help how I feel for her.

Every time I'm around her we have a great time. We get along incredibly well and our personalities thrive together.
>>
>>16539130
There isn't a technique for kisses since they are an expression, just don't fuck up by biting her, if she gets too close and stares go for it
>>
>>16540176
>Am I a massive cunt?

meh i don't judge

>Should I stay away?

if it makes you feel bad.
>>
>>16540198
>if it makes you feel bad
I don't really feel bad. The only part I feel bad for is myself. I feel like I'll keep trying and get my hopes up for it to fail anyway.

I just want to know if there's any way of telling if she feels the same way.
>>
>>16540176
Try to find out how her relationship is going. If she's very happy with it, you should probably respect that. But if she's unsatisfied, you might make her happier than he is.
>>
>>16540213
She's spoken about him on and off. Nothing bad, but nothing "amazing" either. She went on a holiday with him recently for her birthday, and she seemed to enjoy it.

She's only really made one negative remark about him going away for "time alone". And she questioned whether he wanted time away, or time away from her.

Other than that they seem to be a normal happy couple. But I don't know what goes on behind closed doors.
>>
>>16539559
If you like him ask him on a date, if he likes you back he'll accept.
>>
>>16540176
Cunt or not (which i'd say you are for disrespecting and trying to disrupt a relationship), you're being a dummy. There's no way this can end well for you. You either waste all your time and effort, OR she leaves him for you, proving that she's a cheater/monkey-brancher. Exactly the kind of girl you don't want to date because she will do the same thing to you.
>>
>>16539825
No, but it wouldn't prevent me from being attracted to someone.
>>
>>16540250
>or she leaves him for you
Well, if she left him and broke up with him before cheating that wouldn't really make her a bad person. If she cheated innately then I can see why that'd make it worse.
>>
Okay I found out this girl i like gave oral sex to a coworker, is it a petty thing i should get over, or should i take it seriously and drop her. I know people have sex but i cant get over it.
>>
>>16540319
If you're not dating her and merely lack the balls to ask her out, you have no right to be butthurt.
>>
>>16540319
You should get over it. People are having sex/affairs/cheating left and right and there will never be anything you can do to stop it.
>>
>>16540322
I know but I'm asking am i retarded to think otherwise. I knoW people fool around and is it something i should get over
>>
>>16540336
Yes, you are retarded, and yes you should get over it.
>>
>>16540319
Yeah don't bother with her. If her and the coworker aren't involved, that's just sluttiness. And on a more practical note, if you did date her and she acts on these sexual whims, what's stopping her from cheating on you? Personally I wouldn't be interested in her after finding out about that.
>>
>>16540349
>having sex casually makes you a slut
I'd kill to have sex again. It's been three years.
>>
>>16540349
Yeah thats what i was worried about, she blew the guy and they weren't going out, im worried she will do the same
>>
Girls and guys I guess.

A girl wants to have sex with me next week. I kinda want to do it. But I'm thinking about canceling because I'm embarrassed. I'm 5ft 11inch 140lbs. I'm skinny as fuck. She hasn't seen my body, but it looks like shit. I'm pretty ashamed 2bh. I don't know if I should still go. I've heard people say that personality can make a huge difference. Which we have like minds. But this physical thing really bothers me. I hate the way I look..
>>
>>16540381
Go for it. Confidence is what counts mate. Come in shining like you're on top of the world and you'll be fine.
>>
>>16540398

I hear you. It's just hard to think like that. I don't feel confident. And I have this feeling that she has really high expectations of me.
>>
What's the best way to lose your virginity? I'm a guy if that matters.
>>
>>16540409
You're probably over thinking it. I thought I had a small dick before I had sex, and the first time it happened, my girlfriend said it just looked normal and average and she was completely fine with it. I think guys tend to way over think things. I know as a guy that I do. Although I have depression and anxiety so it kind of comes with the territory
>>
>>16540416
Just letting it happen naturally of course. I thought I was never going to lose mine. I then got into my first serious relationship with a girl when I was 17 and I lost it within a few months of being with her.
>>
>>16540358
So go to a club or bar? I haven't done it since I'm not interested, but I don't think casual sex is hard to find.

>>16540381
She thinks you're attractive, so why not? By not seeing your body, do you mean it was an online relationship and you haven't seen each other, or do you just mean she hasn't seen you nude? And I'm not good at approximating appearance from height and weight, so I checked out your BMI, and it's well within normal range. Compared to me, who's quite underweight, you're fine (yours is 19.5, mine is 17). Don't you dare chicken out because you're insecure about trivial shit, you'll regret it for sure. You may hate the way you look, but in all likelihood, she does not. I highly doubt she'll laugh once you take your shirt off and she doesn't see the thick, meaty pecs she may have thought you were hiding under there. Unless she doesn't know what you look like at all, she can guess what your body looks like without clothes from how it looks with clothes, so she won't be surprised. You being insecure would be more unattractive than you not looking like a porn star. So just go for it, it'll probably boost your confidence.
>>
>>16540426
>thought I was never going to lose mine
>17
Fuck off, slut.
>>
>>16540434
I'm a guy. It was in a committed relationship dude.
>>
So this girl I was seeing for a while went weird on me and basically started ignoring me. Whatever, I moved on. However, she's still friends with my mother.

Now she's apparently going to be a guest at our family Christmas party, which isn't exactly large. How much am I allowed to drink in this situation.
>>
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>>16540417

I don't care that I have a small dick, I just don't like how I have a very unttractive body. Last time I was with a girl I didn't want to take my shirt off. Cause I'm so skinny and have a fatty chest. It's disgusting. Look. Why would a girl want that? Sure she likes me personality, but my body? Theres no way. I
>>
>>16540447
You look fucking normal dude. If I was an average woman I'd have no issue with fucking you.
>>
>>16540426
I'm 18 and I've never been in any kind of relationship. I don't have any friends here and everyone around me seems to be fucking all the time. I just feel like I'll never lose it and die alone.
>>
>>16540431

I met her online. She's seen my face, but never seen my body.
>>
>>16540447
I bet you her body isn't perfect either. I don't see anything wrong with yours anyway
>>
>>16540449

Wait, you honestly think that I look normal?
>>
For girls.

I am the same guy who posted earlier. Sunmary

>been talking to this girl for months now
>she gives signs that she likes me
>found out from her best friend that she isn't into me at all

And the next part, that was yeaterday night

>wanted to ask another female friend about something related to homework
>call the girl above
>I close it fast, but She still sees the phone call
>sends me a mesaage, like "helloo"
>I tell her that I didn't wanted to do that
>She sends me a message asking what is wrong with me(like why am I sad or smth)

What am I supposed to do Adv? I don't know anymore. I just want to forget her or be with her... What should I respond?
>>
>>16540452
I know how you feel, except for the virginity part. Don't stress it though. If you're not a neck beard with no social skills, you'll eventually find that special someone.

Pretty much every half decent girl I meet is already in a committed relationship or isn't interested. I'm relatively confident too.

>>16540458
You look absolutely fine. It's literally all in your head. We all have our insecurities, I have mine too. I know that other people aren't thinking that about me though because I know how irrational it sounds. Also, sex isn't like porn. All those chicks are no way near 10/10 without the make up and the guys fucking them are hitting the gym excessively or are roided up to the max.
>>
>>16540454

My chest just looks so gross to me. I always wear jackets and sweaters to try to hide my chest. I've always thought I'm ugly.

I'm stunned you and the other anon think my chest looks normal
>>
>>16540467
Sounds like you have BDD
>>
>>16540467
You look 100% fine mate. Strut your stuff.
>>
>>16540465
I'm still not entirely sure what constitutes a neck beard, but I do have a beard, and my social skills are pretty shitty. I'm either boring, or my dark humor puts people off.
>>
>>16540453
You can infer body fat percentage from the face, so again I don't think she'll be surprised. There is a bit of fat on your chest, but I think the angle accentuates it. I also haven't ever really gotten a good look at a bare male chest outside of photos, so I don't know how common that is. I wouldn't consider you skinny, as I suspected your weight looks totally normal. You don't look too bad to me. And she wants you, not necessarily your body. I doubt she'll be turned off because your body isn't her ideal, because she already wants to have sex with you. That context should be enough to turn her on. Don't worry bro, I probably wouldn't even notice from a more flattering angle, like from the front, which is probably what her vantage point will be. But seriously, minor imperfections won't turn most people away.
>>
>>16540447
You know what you have to do mate
If you dont like your body, then you should do exercises.
I used to be unattractive , very skinny , but in a few months i got fit , only using a routine that i found on internet
Its called Antranik bodyweight guide. Search for it
>>
>>16540481
>my dark humour puts people off
I know how you feel. What with everything being deemed offensive these days. Doesn't stop me. Although I've found that "PC culture" isn't as rampant as it seems to appear to be on the internet. All of my co-workers are disgusting as fuck and say some pretty hilarious and off colour jokes. We all talk about all the hot women that come into work and shit like that.
>>
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>>16540474

That's interesting. This does sound a lot like me in pic

>>16540478

Thanks

>>16540486
I'm definitely skinny, thin arms, legs and all.
>>
>>16540416
To your committed partner who is also a virgin after being together for a long time
>>
>>16540493
I was talking with some girls a few weeks ago and they said they were beat with the ugly stick as a kid. I said I was beat with an actual stick. They asked if I was joking. I said yes, I was actually beat with a tire iron. Everyone was uncomfortable.
>>
>friends with this chick
>not dating yet
>she may have had one night stands

Should I quit that?
>>
>>16540492

I've tried. I have a problem. It's like a fucking cycle I can't break.

I get really depressed over my appearance. And the side effect of my depression is that it surpesses my appetite. I've been stressed all day and I've only eaten half of a Stromboli in the past 16 hours because I can't stomach anything else. So I can't workout if I'm not consuming enough calories or I'll lose more weight. But I can't eat enough because my depression stunts my appetite. I've spend lots of money on shakes and stuff over the years, but never got results. I literally haven't gained a single pound in the past 3 years.
>>
Men, have you ever tried to suck your own dick?
>>
>>16540516
Kek. I would've lost my shit. That's funny as fuck. Where the fuck are peoples sense of humours at?
>>
>>16540531
A guy who claims he hasn't is lying.
>>
>>16540516
>>16540535
Agreed, it made me chuckle. To be fair, girls tend to be much more sensitive with stuff like that.
>>
>>16540531
Of course I have, why wouldn't I?
>>
>>16540535
Well, I told a joke earlier that made everyone laugh, and I've talked with them before, so things aren't completely fucked.
>>
>>16540531
Yeah, many times. Best I got was my mouth around my head. Hurt my back too much so I gave up. What I'd give to suck my own dick.
>>
>>16540546
I think some people just have to learn the kind of person you are. Eventually they'll pick up on your morbid jokes. Most people have realised that shit with me.
>>
>>16540535
>>16540542
Thanks for the input, I was beginning to think my sense of humor sucked. Good to know I just have the wrong crowd.
>>
>>16540561
Nah. I crack jokes all the time. The other week being a perfect example.

We have an old guy at work who's probably into his sixties and both me and the other new guy were talking to one of the girls and he says: "We might be taking his job soon".

And I said: "Yeah he might cark it he's so old". The guy co-worker laughed, but the girl half laughed and said something similar like "That's so mean!"
>>
>>16540521
Why are you stressed? Do you have a large workload, or is it the depression? Exercise is great for lifting spirits, I've found. It's hard to start, but it'll get easier once you do. Also, try counting calories. If you were drinking protein shakes and working out and not gaining muscle mass, you probably just still weren't eating enough. Or you weren't working hard enough. And you can eat without appetite, I've been walking everywhere lately and I didn't change my eating habits so I've lost ten pounds, but now I've been forcing myself to eat more. You may not have the drive to eat, but it doesn't mean you can't. I think it helps to have infrequent, but high-calorie meals, so it feels more like your usual eating habits.
>>
>>16540531
The thought has crossed my mind, but never made an effort.
>>
>>16540576

My depression stresses me out. And I'm really stressed this girl wants to fuck. I don't know why, maybe because it's been 4 years, and I look ugly. I don't know. But my depression has been ad lately. I can't force myself to eat if I'm not hungry. If I'm not hungry and start eating, I get a sensation of being full quickly. And if I keep eating I'll start feeling sick. It's driving me into the ground. I want to get in better shape, but I can't do that until I'm eating enough calories.

Like I said about earlier today. I've only ate half a Stromboli the entire day. And i don't feel hungry at all. My arms muscles and leg muscles feel sore. But I'm not hungry at all.
>>
>>16540461

Bump. I need help
>>
>>16540609
If your depression is so bad that you literally can't eat, you should consider seeing a therapist. Or perhaps you could try gradually upping the amount of food you take in? The stomach tissue is elastic and if you keep filling it, it'll eventually stretch to be able to accommodate more. That's why fat people can eat so damn much in a single meal. Also, is it a specific kind of thing that you're eating that makes you feel sick? You might have a hard time digesting certain items.
>>
>>16540646

Nothing really specific. But if I have food in my stomach when I'm really stressed. I'll automatically get diarrhea. Like I ate some food last night. Texting girl. Find out she wants to fuck. Started stressing hard. Like all night. I shit out all of my food a few hours later in soft-liquid form.

You said a therapist is the type of Doctor I should see?
>>
Okay, im going to ask her out tomorrow any good way to initiate text instead of just hey?
>>
>>16540651
Oh, anxiety gives me an upset stomach as well. I don't have much experience with therapy, but it sounds like the root of the problem is stress and not physical, so a therapist may be able to help.
>>
>>16540520
Bump please
>>
>>16540672

Why quit being friends?
>>
Guys: I've been with my bf only a few weeks, but i would like to give him a small present for christmas. I don't want to overdo it, so i thought about something that shows i care without being over the top. Would you think it's cute if your gf made cookies for you? I'm also thinking about stamping little messages on them, but i'm not sure what to write. Also, he's /fit/, so i'm not sure if i should get him sweets... But as it seems, he's more of a bulking type of guy, so i guess that would be fine? Yeah, i am overthinking again.
>>
>>16540668

I'll look into it. Thanks.

Do you think I should still go have sex with this girl, or cancel? I feel torn
>>
>>16540674

Us guys love cookies
>>
>>16540672
Nah. Only if YOU care. Stop giving a shit what others think. If it bothers you, find out why and if you got that, determine if you think this is a legitimate reason to dismiss somebody or not.
>>
>>16540679
I thought so. Thanks anon! Now i just have to find out what to stamp on them...
>>
>>16540674
Of course it's cute. Baked goods are Girlfriend 101. Get on the ball, lady.

If you know how to make oatmeal cookies, you can pretend like they're /fit/ friendly because SQUATZ AND OATZ.
>>
>>16540667
No one
Just a couple of ice breakers would be fine
>>
>>16540667
Always ask out in person if possible.
>>
>>16540687
Vaginas. That way you put your nookie on his cookie.
>>
>>16540692
I'm very good ar baking, not so good (yet) at having a bf. so there's that.
Ha, that's a funny idea. I thought about making him protein-bars or something alike. But after all, it's christmas. I don't think he'll mind a small sugary treat.
>>
>>16540674
Put protein powder in the cookies! Or put eggs in them. I also like the oatmeal cookie idea.
>>
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>>16540697
Yeah - sure...

Like that?
>>
>>16540704
I've already baked a lot of protein cookies and stuff. They are delicious, but noting beats the real stuff. You think he would be even happier with a treat that goes straight to his muscles?
>>
>>16540705
More subtle. You want him to take a while before he catches on that he's eating pussy.

That's when you wink suggestively.
>>
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>>16540705

Don't. That's fucking gross looking. I would not eat those.
>>
>>16540712
>>16540713
It was a joke guys!
>>
>>16540714
I was thinking of something more cute than suggestive. I'm suggestive enough the rest of the time.
What about inside jokes and pet-names?
>>
>>16540705
Oh man, these look so fun to eat.
>that one with the tampon string
Should have included a bloody period-unexpectedly-started one too.

>>16540711
I can't speak for him but I think I'd be overcome with endearment if my girlfriend baked me hearty protein cookies for Christmas.

>>16540712
Put discharge in the cookie? Secret ingredient.
>>
>>16540719

"Wanna nibble on my cookies? ;)"
>>
>>16540720
I know! Everytime i take a look i find something better than last time. They are so good.

Hmmm, i might look into that. Cause overcoming with endearment is the reaction i hope for.
Or i'll make different sorts of cookies...!

Ewww... I think i'll pass
>>
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>>16540720
>>16540719

Pic related
>>
>>16540721
A bit too long to put on a cookie... But i could write a secret note and hide it inside one!
>>
>>16540728
Don't hide objects inside of food.
>>
>>16540726
Poor guy.
Next thing he knows i'm making lasagna with my period blood...
>>
>>16540731
right. Bad idea.
>>
>>16540728

Why not write "Close Your Eyes" each word on a seperate cookie. And while He's eating the cookies with his eyes closed, you unzip his pants, and start playing with his dick?
>>
>>16540738
what if he eats them in the wrong order or not imediately or only half of them? It might create a black hole!
Also, i'd like to take this opportunity to NOT go down on him for once.
>>
>>16540745

You don't like blow jobs?
>>
>>16540749
Oh, i do! It's just that i don't think i should jump on him EVERY opportunity
>>
Girls.

I really dislike making out. It makes me feel really uncomfortable, and I think it's pretty gross desu

Is there other ways to warm you up without our mouths and tongues touching?
>>
>>16540726
Her voice actor died.

RIP in pieces
>>
>>16540765
You aren't ready for intercourse if kissing grosses you out
>>
>>16540767

Fucking really? Who's going to do her voice for season 2?

>>16540771

It's weird. I don't mind going down on a girl, but I really REALLY dislike making out.
>>
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>>16540779
>Who's going to do her voice for season 2?
There will never be a season 2 now
>>
>>16540779
Why? What grosses you out so much?
>>
>>16540781

You don't mean that
>>
>>16540765
Try to find people who just want casual hookups and think kissing is too intimate.
>>
>>16540783
Mouths. Mouths are just gross to me. And I don't enjoy having my face on someone else's face. It's just weird, idk
>>
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>>16540784
Berserk went the better part of a decade without updates. Embrace the suffering.
>>
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>>16540795
>>
>>16540785
Ok, i can understand this. Just skip that part then. It will be hurtful, but what do they expect from a hook up
>>
>>16540788
And vaginas are fine? Well, everybody their own. To answer your question: you could try to cuddle and then go straight for the goods. For example, spooning and starting to fondle her boobs, then flip her over, suck some nipples, then right down.
>>
>>16540447
A bit late to the party, but you're fine. I've hooked up with fitter guys, I've hooked up with less fit guys. I'd say you look about average, so you just have to make sure you take care of her and that your personality is good.
>>
Do girls like having their nipples sucked, or their boobs fondled?
>>
>>16540813

Might try that. I always move too fast. I try to keep kissing down to less than 30 seconds because it's so fucking awkward. I usually try to work my way down them as fast as possible. But the last time the girl like pulled my Face back into hers and like held head to keep making out.
>>
>>16540826
I do
>>
>>16540828
I can totally understand her. It will always be kind of weird if you try to avoid making out. I suggest you try to solve your issues with it. Might be easier and yield better results.
>>
>>16540826
Yup, makes me soaking wet in a matter of moments.
>>
>>16540844

It just feels so awkward. Like I think I lack sensitivity in my lips, so I can't feel or tell what the hell is going on. All I can really feel is saliva. It's just gross
>>
>>16540850
Have you ever kissed somebody you really cared about?
That does sound weird, cause there are a lot of very receptive nerves...
>>
>>16539559
If he gets extremely sullen when you're talking about other men.

>>16539570
Because men are desperate beings. Think heroin addict desperate. Most will happily be in a long term relationship with somebody they absolutely loathe.

>>16539618
Quests for missing tampons are always fun.

>>16539657
I would be in hysterics for days if I found it. Its fine, but its also extremely funny.
Case in point:
>>16539697

>>16540176
If their relationship is a good one, what you do won't matter. If it sucks, things may work in your favour. Being the champ means beating everyone else.

>>16540381
I used to be even skinnier than you. Its not a big deal.

>>16540416
To a woman, in that case.

>>16540447
On 2nd thought, lift. Lift right now. Jesus Christ.

>>16540531
No. If I was going to suck a dick, I'd go for a more aesthetic one, assuming such a thing exists.

>>16540674
Leave the messages, just the cookies. My life suddenly feels rather empty.
>>
>>16540864
>leave the messages

Might be a good idea. Maybe i'll do a few. I just hope he doesn't get me something that cookies are no match for...
>>
>>16540863
>Have you ever kissed somebody you really cared about?

Nope, never.

And I think it's because I've had a habit since I was a little kid to chew on my lips. And I've been doing it for so long that I lost sensativity
>>
>>16540765
My boyfriend hates making out, it makes him claustrophobic, but he finds plenty of other uses for his tongue. It doesn't have to be a deal breaker.
>>
>>16540807
Are you asking what people expect from a hook up? Depends on the individual. Some people are fine with one night stands. Some don't understand it's just a hookup and start texting you hearts the next day. Though you're less likely to get the latter if you avoid kissing at all.
>>
>>16540864
>On 2nd thought, lift. Lift right now. Jesus Christ.

I can't do that for these reasons >>16540521
>>
>>16540875
I'm very sorry for you anon...

That might actually be the cause. Did you chew that hard? Why?
I genuinely don't know what you could do to reverse that. Maybe ask a doc
>>
What's wrong with making out?
>>
>>16540882
>I'm very sorry for you anon...

Why do you say that?


And about my lips, it's just something I've been doing for at least the past 15 years for sure. I just chew on them and pick at them a lot. In fact, I've been doing it for so long I have a little white scar on the left side of my bottom lip. I think it's a stress habit. If it's damaged nerves, then I don't think a doctor could do anything about that.
>>
>>16540891

As I said before. I just think mouths are gross
>>
>>16540896
Because you never kissed somebody you really cared about. And because something is bothering you so much, you chewed your lips so much you don't even feel kissing anymore. That's not normal anon. But you probably know that.
Well, maybe it's just that your skin thickened. Maybe exfoliating, chapstick and not chewing would help. I feel lile the bigger reason is a mental blockade or something
>>
Girls:
I wanna improve myself and I need a girl IRL to tell me more specifically what's wrong with me.

How would you react if a guy asked you this kind of stuff?
>>
>>16540907
Depends how i feel about you. If i like you (romantically or not), i'll gladly help you
>>
>>16540907
Guy speaking, but I have a somewhat similar relationship with a friend of mine. We give each other advise and a different perspective all the time.
>>
>>16540905

I don't doubt that I have a mental block. Kissing just seems so unnatural, and I don't know how to explain the rest
>>
>>16540919
For how long would I need to know you in order for you to give me an honest response to that question?

Also, what type of girl should I try to befriend in order to get the best response?

I'm basically afraid of the usual polite "but you're fine the way you are, you don't need to change anything".
>>
>>16540938
Long enough to be able to tell her your not so awesome secrets without it feeling weird or forced. It's actually not that easy, now that i think of it. She shouldn't be somebody that gossips, she should be friendly, honest and bot too judgemental. Why not try online? You can skip a great part of "having to know her good enough".
>>
>>16540929
What about other forms of showing affection? Caressing, hugging, cuddling?
You probably need a professional to sort this out. It sounds pretty deep rooted...
>>
>>16540957

Hugging is ok if it's short. I don't mind caressing If I'm the one doing the touching, but I don't like being touched really. And I've only ever cuddled once before. It was alright I guess. Then again, I've never done any of that stuff with a girl I liked.
>>
>>16540965
Pls anon, get help. This sound like serious intimacy issues. The sooner you start working on it, the better. Everything else will just leave you lonely and devastated in a few years...
>>
>>16540975
>Everything else will just leave you lonely and devastated in a few years...

I appreciate the concern anon. But I'm 25, and don't want to get married or have kids ever. I just don't know if I should get help, and where? What type of doctor does this, and what's the treatment?
>>
It sucks that there is two genders. A need is created in oneself for the other gender. Where if there was one gender then we would be more whole and fulfilled. Multiple genders is a big source of dissonance within humanity.
>>
>>16540952
>Why not try online?
Sure, any advice? (/soc/ looks like a cesspool of attention whores, male or female, who posts angled and/or shopped pics of themselves for gratification in a circlejerking fashion).

Also I look like shit in pictures, only pics I look OK are when I'm not expecting them.
>>
>>16540965
Oh, and i kind of know that feel. I loathed being caressed a long time. Turns out it qas because i couldn't imagine somebody truly WANTING to do that to me. So it always felt wrong and forced. I guess i slowly got over it, i love all those things now.
>>
>>16540907
I'd probably be pretty hesitant to answer that, to be honest

>>16540826
Sure
>>
>>16540982
Yeah, you'll probably regret thaton your deathbed. But having an awesome relationship doesn't necessarily involve kids and marriage.

You see, if every girl you meet is shallow, slutty and not worth your commitment, then maybe you should take a good look at yourself. I know you think i'm just talking bs. And i probably can't change that. But maybe some of the things i said will linger and make you think.
>>
>>16540982
Oh, and i was thinking of a psychotherapy. Ask your doc to get you an appointment.
>>
>>16540986
>Turns out it qas because i couldn't imagine somebody truly WANTING to do that to me.

That's exactly how I feel. With anything, kissing, getting head, sex, even things like people going out of there way for me and buying me gifts
>>
>>16540983
Needing perspective from the opposite gender is just a symptom of a broad issue with lacking perspective on other people. This is where one ends up after empathy dies.

I could answer almost all of the questions asked of either gender just out of my personal experience with other people. It's pretty straightforward to put yourself in another person's shoes as long as you have some basis by which to relate to them. Coming here with a question means having failed that.

What I'm really driving at is that Anons here are just as clueless about people of their own gender as they are of the opposite. They're simply unaware of that because they figure "I know what I think, so other guys/girls must think it too." So with respect to your suggestion, it would do fuck all. Weak empathy is the source of dissonance within humanity. Such a shame, then, that it's one of our hallmarks as a species to empathize at an intellectual level.
>>
>>16540952
Also, I don't mind telling people I will never see again about my insecurities. But I do mind telling that to acquaintances, because it's still kind of embarrassing, even if it's pretty obvious I'm not over-confident.

If a random girl I've been talking to for like 30 minutes could tell me, it'd be great. And if she's down to it, we could go shopping together before some netflix and chill :^)
>>
>>16540992

Oh I don't think anything you're saying is bs. I appreciate you talking to me 2bh. But why do you think I'd regret not getting married on my death bed?

And I never said that girls the girls I meet are "too slutty, and not worth my commitment". It's the exact opposite. I don't feel like I'm worth their time.
>>
>>16540998
Why do you think most people can't take a compliment? It's simply because they don't feel like deserve it. And that's something that you don't want in your life. It makes everything miserable. It's the most important thing to work on. And sometimes professional help is the only way to get out of that
>>
>>16541012

I do need professional help. I think you've convinced me to see doctors my insurance covers
>>
>>16541005
That's awesome!
Nah, i don't think you'll regret not getting married. But i'm fairly sure about not having kids.

Ok, sorry, i was overinterpretig. I assumed, because that's usually the thing guys say to justify sleeping around.

Oh my... Anon. i just want to give you a really good hug. It seems like you didn't have one in a looooong time.
>>
>>16541018
Yes, do it! If anything, it won't make your situation worse. I am going to therapy myselfe, and i always look forward to it. It's just relieving. You see, you don't tell anybody EVERYTHING normaly. You might tell your guy friends about the pregnancy scare you went trough, and your mom about your worries about finals. But it's a whole new experience to talk to somebody that has such a complete understanding of your situation, paired with professional skills, time, patience and experience
>>
>>16541023
>Oh my... Anon. i just want to give you a really good hug.

You're a kind person. You're too kind for 4chan haha

>It seems like you didn't have one in a looooong time.

Correct, I can't think of any hugs from girls in at least the past 2 years. I think the last time was in like, early 2014 from a tinder girl who blew me but I couldn't even cum.
>>
>>16541042
Eh, i' ve got the whole spectrum in me.

Anon, how did that happen? Care to tell me a bit about your childhood? Genuinely curious...
>>
>>16541001
>>16540984
Bump this, please give advice.
>>
>>16541042
Oh, and i think it's fairly normal to not get off easily from a bj. it seems like after a certain age it just looses a bit of novelty. Cause in the end, i guess pussy feels better. It's probably more the thought of a bj that's so arrousing. And that might only go so far
>>
>>16541054
Oh sorry anon. somehow my answer got lost. I'm on my phone...

It's normal to not wanting to talk to people you are close with about stuff like that! It makes you pretty vulnerable and sometimes you just don't want that - and that's ok.
>>
>>16541065
My answer was something along the line of: you could talk to me. And that almost everybody feels that way about their pics, because it's mirrored different than you are used to and because it lacks bodylanguage and your personality
>>
Both: the guy i'm heading into comitment-city is 6 years my junior. How do i make the best out of this and how do i avoid it being an issue later on?
>>
>>16541049

Hm, well I don't think early childhood really matters. But starting with middle school- I was a shy, quiet kid. A few girls I liked, but never talked to them. Only learned about girls and sex from friends. I neve got the talk from parents.

In high school I was still quiet. But was driven to going into the military. That was my #1 focus. While my friends were going on dates and parties, I'd go do PT and read military books. All 4 years of high school. I didn't see a point of getting a girlfriend because I knew a relationship wouldn't last. So didn't want to waste my time. I did end up fooling around with 1 girl during my high school years. But that's only because a friend set me up with some chick. After high school I went Into the military during Summer 2010
>>
>>16541090
I, on the other hand, think it matters a great deal.

What made you think a relationship wasn't going to last? What was the core of your drive to go to military?
>>
>>16541079
>almost everybody feels that way about their pics
I don't think so, social media have made people generally more and more vain and their profiles are full of pictures of themselves, but this is slightly off-topic.

What type of girl would be the best to give this kind of advice in your opinion? There was a girl that started to give me those advices a few months ago but she was way too close to my job for me to open up.

Online was mentioned, I guess at that point, it doesn't matter which gender I get replies from, so any advice on that?

I mean I know the obvious, I'm fat, so I've hit the gym and lost 10kg so far, I think currently I brought my BMI to something close to 26. But then there could be my haircut, the way I dress, but also the way I act, which means a real person would be better.

I'm pretty sure there are girls out there who like the idea of tutoring a poor dude into improving himself.
>>
>>16541099
Yeah, why do you think they do that? Because they hope that if a lot people repeatedly tell them how stunning they look they could someday start believing it themselfe. Been there, done that. Doesn't work that way.

Well, i would love to help you! Makeovers are my secret pet activity
>>
>>16541098

I did so much research before I went into the military is was crazy. One thing I constantly read was relationships in the military are very difficult to work with. And it is definitely true. I saw a lot of my buddies get fucked over by their girlfriends. So I guess in high school after reading all that. I decided to avoid it completely

>what drove you to join?

Not memeing but, 9/11
>>
>>16541104
Ok, i can see the reasoning behind that decision. Speaking for myselfe, i'd rather get my heart broken than locking it away.

Makes sense. But why? There must have been a reason behind it. Did you admire the selfless and bravef helpers? What was it?
>>
>>16541112

I was pissed as hell that these kebabs did this to us. So I wanted pay back. Same mindset as almost everyone else who went Infantry.

But yeah so back to childhood. I decided in 4th grade (year 2001) that I was going to go into the military. So all middle school and high school that was my focus. I actually believed that I'd probably die in the service. I thought that so much I really convinced myself that would happen. So since I was so wrapped up in joining the military, I only had 1 sexual experience during all of my years of school. And had almost 0 experience with girls. Joined the military after school. Went to Afghanistan, didn't die. Came back, lost virginity to some sub-par bitch cause desperate. Do 3 more years in the military. Get pissed cause of the politics. Get out. Work doing Armed Secuity now making good money, but working a shit ton of hours. Depression grows and grows. Make tinder cause friends tell me I need pussy. And I have no other way to meet girls. Meet up with Tinder slut. Get shitty blow Job. Stop talking to girls for about 2 years. Make tinder again out or boredom. Make a text friend. She wants sex, but I'm hesitant. Delete tinder but keep texting her. And here I am today.
>>
>>16541130

Forgot to add

You all here at /adv/ have no idea how much you've helped me just back talking to me the past 2 years. Several times I've seriously considered an hero.

So, Thank you guys.
>>
>>16541130
I understand, that you were pissed. But can you try to focus on the good part here? You see, that's probably where your issues come frome. You only see the bad things. You are sure you joined the military because you wanted to kill every one of those xxx singlehandedly. That makes you strong, big, scarry and agressive. I totally get that those are things a guy probably doesn't mind. But you completelty forgot the other side of the coin. I think that somewhere you only felt that way because you felt immensely sorry for the people who were involved in this incident. And that it triggered your instinct to protect. Which is absolutely beautiful. You seem to forget that your core is a heart of gold and that it deserves everything from a good hug to a loving kiss up to being loved unconditionaly. Pleas, try to start observing these traits in yourself anon.

And yeah, tinder isn't really a good idea. It's a pit full of people with intimacy and comitment issues.
>>
>>16541134
It's give and take anon. adv has helped me A LOT too. I keep coming back. And don't think about ending things! You still got so much to experience ...
>>
>>16541145

Again, you're too nice. I feel like you're giving me more credit then I deserve.
>>
>>16541089
This doesn't really matter unless you're both very young. May I ask your ages?
>>
>>16541149
No i don't! But i know it's hard for you to see that i'm right. Keep digging until you find that heart of gold yourself and then keep reminding yourself of it every opportunity. You can't stand when a dog gets tortured? There, a good starting point! You got a lot of empathy and drive to protect. A very, very honorable and noble trait.
You would go berserk if anybody touched the people you care for? Again. You have to look for those things. They are there! You probably just labeled them negatively.
>>
>>16541156
28 and 22...
>>
>>16541160
>You probably just labeled them negatively.

I don't really understand what you mean by this. I don't like myself because I'm stupid, skinny as fuck, and feel worthless
>>
>>16541168
That's the whole point anon. you see, if you see a dog getting tortured you probably feel rage. Now: you can take out of that that you want to kill people who do such awefull things. Thus, feeling violent and agressive. Or you could take out of it that you have a strong i stinct to protect and are able for empathic thinking. Do you see how doing the first can negatively affect the way you think about yourself? It makes you feel like you are a bunch of issues, bound to explode in the near future. The later will make you feel peaceful, EVEN if you decide to go and kill that motherfucker
>>
>>16541174

I'm confused.

I'm not upset with myself because I want to go strangle the guy who abused a dog. I have no sympathy for people like that. Same with the kebabs who cause terrorism. Fuck em.
>>
>>16541099
Anon

And

>>16541174
Anon,

I have to go to work! I'd really like to not let this convos die, so if you feel like it, we could talk more on skype: selinaselita

Take care!
>>
>>16541178
No no. It's ok to feel that way. It's more an issue with how you label your emotions and reasons to feel that way. It defines the picture you have about yourself. Sorry, i'm in a hurry! See my previous post
>>
>>16541182

I'll add you later on skype! It was nice talking to you.

Also I have Kik if that's easier- Macchi30
>>
>>16541190
I don't have kik. Talk to you later anon
>>
>>16541166
That's not that big a difference. There shouldn't be any problems.
>>
>>16541198
I hope so. I really like him...
>>
>>16539121
whether clitoral or vaginal stimulation gets a woman off has like nothing to do with her "sensitivity", which in turn has nothing to do with using toys or not.

pretty much the only variable here is the amount of time it takes to achieve orgasm, which has to do with the frequency that you orgasm and how turned on you are. that's it.

tell your boyfriend to try masturbating from time to time. that should make him last longer
>>
For girls: how often is crying a genuine expression of emotion of deep sadness and how often is it a tool to avoid an argument? (in a relationship context)
>>
>>16541280
literally have never cried to avoid an argument ever. so 0% of the time on that one. it's always an expression of emotion, i wouldn't say always "deep sadness". sometimes i cry out of sadness, other times stress, frustration, fear, etc.
>>
>>16540381
I'm about the same as you (6ft even, 140 lbs) and I actually have a skinnyfat body since I literally never exercise and I eat really unhealthy. I'm extremely unhappy with my body. But, I got laid once, and the girl didn't care at all. Honestly, if a girl likes you enough to let you know she wants to have sex with you, she's probably not gonna care that much about what you look like with your shirt off (unless for whatever reason she thinks you're insanely jacked or something).
>>16540531
You're probably going to get somewhat skewed responses since the demographic that 4chan attracts is likely to be a little more sexually deviant but yeah I've tried and been successful to about midshaft. Weird feeling, don't really wanna do it again.
>>16540674
Honestly just getting the guy anything would be a good idea if you like him unless he's explicitly said he doesn't like gifts, and you can't go wrong with baked goods because even if they're shit and he throws them out he'll appreciate the effort and time that went into it.
>>16540999 (checked)
I don't think it has much to do with a lack of empathy, but I do think you hit the nail on the head when you said it has to do with a lack of perspective on other people in general.
>>16541033 (checked)
A friend and I were talking one time about how everybody should have a therapist/counselor. I've wanted to go for a long time since it's free at my school, the hours are just a little inconvenient and I have pretty bad phone anxiety for whatever reason, and you can only set up an appointment by phone. Part of the draw of 4chan is actually the therapeutic aspect of it: having someone to tell pretty much anything to and not having to worry about it creeping into your personal life. It's insanely cathartic.
>>16541166 (checked)
Literally not a problem at all. Even if he doesn't know your age, if he thinks you're attractive enough to date you he probably won't care. Just don't stress about it or seem insecure about it.
>>
>>16541280
When I cry during an argument it's just a natural response from when I was a kid which is more frustrating to me since it's very difficult to stop and automatic. It also makes my jaw lock and for whatever reason makes it very difficult to speak any kind of words.

That said if they're not trying to communicate or if they don't just need a few minutes to compose, then they're avoiding.
>>
>>16541280
I often cry when I'm angry. If I cry during an argument, it's because I'm worked up, not because I'm trying to manipulate the other person.
>>
>>16541280
I cry out of frustration or anger, not out of sadness or to avoid an argument or anything. I cry extremely easily, though, sometimes I'm just laying down on my side and my eyes decide that they're going to produce too much liquid for no apparent reason.
>>
Girls (and guys with experience in this):

Before you read this, just know that I'm pretty socially awkward but I'm somehow decent at masking it. I have trouble on picking up romantic cues from women because I have next to no experience. I'm probably making it into a bigger deal than it is

Anyway, I pretty much unintentionally led a girl on when I know there's no chance I'll date/hook up with her. We're both sophomores in college, and I met her through a friend freshman year. We have somewhat similar taste in movies and music and we generally get along well so I enjoy spending time with her, I just don't really find her attractive at all. The friend that introduced us asked me a couple months back how I felt about the girl and I told the friend that I don't feel anything romantically for the girl so I assumed the girl knew. I've been spending more and more time with the girl lately, and I'm pretty sure she thinks I like her but that I'm just too shy to make a move or something since I'm a pretty quiet guy. Normally when we watch movies (which has happened multiple times) in her room we sit on the same bed but there's no touching involved at all. The problem is that three weeks ago we got really drunk and were dancing together at a party and got really physical but I blacked out and have no idea if we did anything else. Last week, we both got drunk and ended up cuddling in my room for a while. Then a couple days ago, she was drunk and I was sober and we were watching a movie in her room, and she gets close to me again and puts my arm over her and I just sort of went with it because I'm apparently the type of idiot that thought platonic cuddling was possible.

I know I should tell her that I'm not into her and I don't really think she'll get hurt by it or anything, I just don't want to make it awkward or make it seem like I think I'm the shit or whatever if it turns out she only got physical with me because she was drunk. What's the most polite way to go about this?
>>
>>16539078
Dose him up on pseudo ephedrine which is just a few Cold and flu tablets. It really helps!
>>
>>16539096
Fuck off!!!! You're what's wrong with this world.
>>
>>16539136
I want to cum on your face so badly right now. Without consent.
>>
To the dudes and ladies, what are your thoughts on your date talking a lot?

And by a Lot I mean you barely get to answer any of his/her questions and mostly listen to stuff he/she talks about.
>>
>>16541662
>what are your thoughts on your date talking a lot?

as long as it's not retarded im ok with it
>>
Another female friend watched my convo with a female friend with narrowed eyes
She also got annoyed at me for some reason
What's with that?
>>
How can one assure a girl that her breasts are fine?
>>
This girl classmate I used to date and always had a good time with has gone cold and I get the feeling I'm a bother to her. She has become very busy to the point that her schoolwork is literally all she does (yes, really) and the only time I ever see her is when she spends the break with a classmate. I bump into them almost daily and stick around.
Now she has a shitton of work and she's been stressed out for a while now, but towards that classmate she's almost as cheerful and 'fun' as she used to be, and he has 'value' to her because he helps her with her classes. Towards me she's matter-of-fact and cold, and I feel like an outsider pestering her about her life.

I know /adv/ protocol was to stop reading after the first sentence and respond
>she isn't interested so move on, you dweeb
But it's more complicated than that. I want to ask her how she feels about me, about my persistence. If she's blunt and ignoring because she's stressed out or because I've become one guy too many for her. I don't want to drop her, and I want to make sure she wants me out of her life if it really is that.
Thing is, I barely see her outside of those breaks nowadays, and it's just a simple question and she's too busy for me to say "let's meet up for this"

How should I ask it? What's the most diplomatic way to put this?
>>
>>16541700
Put your hands up her top.
>>
>>16541662
I'd be happy. I like people talking a lot, as long as it isn't complete shit.
>>
Okay. So I let my ego get the better of me and I fucked someone I shouldn't have. I was weak and lonely and he was hot so I went home with him. *disaster* Next thing I know he's reliving his incredibly fucked-up adolescence and takes it out on me because I'm an older female and I'm not his mom or whateva. Anyway the dude got mean as shit and kicked me out after he came in my mouth. Now I see him out and of course he ignores me. I'll admit it pisses me off to see him. It's not like I want to fuck him again but I hate this bad feeling. I want him to suck it up and be cool with me but he's acting like a bitch. What do I do? If anything?
>>
I met this girl who was interested in me, we went on a coffee date and we texted for a while but now we havent talked in about a week. I'm always the one to initiated the texts. Do women always expect the guy to pursue them or start talking to them or is she not as interested in me as I thought? Should I start texting her again or should I wait for her to text me? To add she is kinda shy.
>>
>>16541346
Next time she tries to cuddle or get physical with you say something like "Could you not do that. It makes me uncomfortable." That should send a clear message.
>>
>>16541712
If you don't like him, why is him ignoring you an issue? Ignore him and let time go by.
>>
For either gender: what are your thoughts on modern feminism and so-called "Social Justice Warriors"?
>>
>>16541769
"No fun allowed"

Guy, by the way
>>
>>16541769
Modern feminism: fighting (for the most part) a non-existenant boogeyman.
SJW's: too politically correct and easily offended.
>>
>>16540675
Just do it, she's a nobody from the internet so even if you get so anxious that you sperging out it will have no effect on your life. And maybe it will be nice.
>>
>>16541769
Guy

Feminism is a successful movement looking for relevance in a world that doesn't need it anymore. Social justice warriors are assholes looking for a way to feel righteous while being assholes. They're a match made in hell.
>>
>>16541760
Well… it's not like I don't like him. He's a strange little character. I wouldn't mind being casual friends. That does sound weird, doesn't it?

I guess it's just that I hate the idea of someone in my presence who genuinely hates me for reasons that could be cleared up with 10 minutes of honest talk. I hate being hated. I know I should just suck it up and deal but… understand how bad feeling doesn't just go away but gets worse over time?
>>
Is it ever ok if I tell a girl I'm interested in her? Not overexagerating, just tell her that I find her atrractive and I want to spend time with her.

Found out through external sources that she isn't into me and ppl suggested I should tell her that before I start moving on. My second option would be ignoring her completely, make her come after me
>>
>>16541769
Femanon. Old enough to have lived through anti-sex feminism in the '90's which was mitigated somewhat by the trend of "owning" one's sexuality which is a good thing to a point. Unfortunately, this social warriorship business is promulgated by women about 10 years younger. And goddam if these women are fucked in the head. It's how they gain power, I suppose. By being offended by everything. "Fat shaming" and all that crap. I honestly don't get it. I can't stand this p.c. shit but I'm still a feminist in that I believe very simply that women deserve equal civil and social rights as men. That's all feminism means. How it got up in everyone's bidness I dont' know.
>>
>>16541826
>She isn't in to me
So why are you bothering with any of this shit?
>>
>>16541748
P-please respond.
>>
>>16541866

Cause her friends are not her hence no third party knows better than her
>>
Girls would you to date a guy who has semi bad acne? I've been going to a dermatologist but it hasn't been helping all that well.

It's hard to have confidence when you look like a pizza
>>
Guys what is your reason for texting a girl first but being really short with your texts/answers and seeming uninterested?
>>
>>16542332
If you aren't intimate but are both clearly interested in each other, initial text conversations are awkward, if not occasionally featuring sporadic moments of fun.

Always this way with me.
>>
>>16541769
Female. Both are ridiculous. Amusing at best.
>>
Both genders: When is it acceptable to buy a girl a gift?
>>
>>16541280
I can't force myself to cry, and even if I could, I wouldn't use it to manipulate others. Pretty much any negative emotion makes me tear up though, not just deep sadness. Fear, stress, embarrassment, frustration, being overwhelmed, anger, sadness, ect. I can't help it.
>>
>>16542370
If you want to
>>
>>16542386
elaborate
>>
>>16542354
You perfectly described the situation. They start off awkward, get interesting and hilarious for a bit then get awkward again and it feels like we're both digging for something to talk about. Though 10 text conversations in it should be better
>>
Girls, how would you react if your mutual interest who is over a foot taller than you gave you a hug and you felt his boner press up to your boob? I'm trying to play it off like I had my phone in my pocket but wondering if I should just tell the truth. We're both into each other but no kissing as of yet so I don't want to rush things. Still I'm kinda curious how she might react and just remembering it really turns me on
>>
>>16542405
Sorry, but a good idea would be to stop the bullshit you are playing on her and just kiss her already.
>>
>>16539009
THREAD REVIVE.
>>
>>16542425
there's a new one now dweeb
>>16542404
Thread posts: 317
Thread images: 13


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