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Small Breasts and My Boyfriend

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I've been struggling for a very long time to like myself, my breasts in particular.
They're very small, (32A, kinda similar in size to the girl in this picture.)

It's not even that I just don't like them, I've cried for hours because of how much I hate them, I've considered suicide and even cut them with a knife on multiple occasions. I realise how ridiculous this is, and that it's really nothing to kill yourself over, but still I have episodes where I feel this way.

Yesterday I looked at stuff on my boyfriend's PC (I wasn't snooping, I looked at a folder of stuff that had my name and was meant to be stuff he planned on sending me... however, there was a bunch of images of girls with huge breasts, like DD's+.

>will continue in next post
Hoooooooly shit you have issues.

Personally, I prefer small tits. I think they're cute.

My ex had these massive DDs and I wasn't fond of them at all.

Different people like different things. If your boyfriend doesn't appreciate your body type, there are guys out there who will.
I can't get those images out of my head since... immediately afterwards I cut myself... my boyfriend saw this on my breasts of course, and I explained to him what happened.

We had a fight, and he held me down and yelled at me, kept pushing on my scars while saying things like "Never cut yourself again, never go through anything on my computer without me being around."

He asked what image it was that I saw, and I told him I couldn't show him some of the exact ones because I deleted two of them. He pushed against my scar even harder and yelled at me.

At this point I was really furious and tried to get away from him, but he kept me held down and continued to yell...

After more of him pushing down on my scars, I said that I still really hate my breasts, and thinking of those images makes me want to cut again. He slapped me
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You have a severe case of body dysmorphia. Paraphrased a mental disorder characterized by an obsessive preoccupation that some aspect of one's own appearance is severely flawed and warrants exceptional measures to hide or fix it.

Personally like the other anon said, I prefer small breasts. If a girl is cute she is cute. Apparently your boyfriend thought that when he got with you.

To solve this issue in the short term, know you must have some redeeming qualities and attractiveness but in order to fix your self hatred I suggest you look into treatment for Body Dysmorphia.

Take care and have a good day.
He says that he really does love my body type, but after seeing those images.. I struggle to believe him.
>They wont sag when youre 50
OH HELL NO, get away from him!!!!!
Wooooaaaahhhh it sounds like this boyfriend of yours is a bit on the abusive side. You need to address this as well. He should be helping you not slapping you and holding you down while worrying about his computer privacy
After our fight he refused to leave me alone, made me hot chocolate and comforted me.

We were going to play an online game together, but then he asked to see which pictures it was that I saw.. so I showed him.. and this time ended up scrolling past more images of the same girl.. It killed me, and I told him it still really bothers me and I want to cut.

Long story short, he got mad, I apologised to him and said that I know the issue is with me and that I shouldn't feel this way just because he has pictures of girls with huge breasts on his PC. I said I'm going to try like my breasts and not hate myself.

I struggle to do this, any advice?
Doesn't matter what he thinks. The person you're in a relationship with is supposed to comfort you when you feel like shit, not make it ten times worse. Cutting your breasts because you hate them so much is a bit fucked up, but he's fucked up in a much worse way. Get away from him and work on your own issues.

Fuck this shit. You deserve better and he doesn't deserve you. Get away from this abusive prick.

Also I think small breasts are cute. Don't hurt yourself, get some psychological help.
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With your level of self-hatred and your abusive boyfriend, what he has on his computer should be the least of your worries.

I feel like this goes way back to the debate about watching porn while in a relationship yada yada. When I watch porn I change my mind on what I wanna watch or look at everytime. If i'm in the mood for some asian does that mean I hate my girlfriend for not being asian? No of course not. I love her for all of her great traits as well
I've heard of this before a very long time ago, before I had the problem with my breasts (I was still very young so convinced that they were still growing... which they weren't.)
Anyway I'll look into it, because it seems I have other symptoms of this as well (OCD and hair pulling)
That's a really unhealthy relationship. He physically abused you, you violated his privacy (maybe unintentionally).

Learn to love yourself, and I'd recommend doing that alone. The whole "I hurt you because I love you" pattern of abuse is silly. Don't fall for it.

I hope it makes you feel better to know that I have huge tits, and am super jealous of small perky breasts now. They were fun when I was younger, but now that I'm in my mid-twenties with a baby, the sagging is ridiculous.
I'm really not sure if he's abusive...I mean I know it definitely seems like it, but I don't know..

I spoke to him about it and uh.. well he had a weird answer... He said I could have used the safeword..?

I'm guessing he wants to bring the Master/Slave thing to outside of our sex life as well..
I struggled with it with severe acne when I was younger and it'll link you straight to other disorders like OCD, Bipolar, and depression. Seek professional help. BUT FIRST GET RID OF YOUR BOYFRIEND
The thing is.. I know it's not going to go away even if I left him.. I imagine he's just so fed up with hearing about it so much.. Me crying and wanting to cut myself is a somewhat common occurrence, and I guess I can't blame him for not having the patience anymore.

I was like this in my previous relationships as well, one of which the guy had a major preference for small breasts, and it still didn't stop me from cutting myself.
If you didn't have the agreement to take the BDSM thing out of the bedroom, and he forced you down, yelled at you, and slapped you, that is absolutely abuse. If that is acceptable to you, you need to give him consent beforehand, with rules/guidelines to follow.

Also keep in mind that BDSM is NOT FUCKING THERAPY and it's fucking stupid to try to use it to solve real issues.
Getting rid of your boyfriend isn't going to completely fix your issues but it sure will help with the less-getting-yelled-at-slapped-pushed-and-held-down issue
what the fuck, you cut on your titties? God, you're mentally unstable. Your bf is a twat, possibly mentallu unwell too. Get some help, jesus

I say cutting yourself is more problematic than being jelly or having no titties, I mean, come on. No relationship will fly on that, you're obviously not in a place to be in a relationship senpai

go get some help
I don't know.. it's mostly that they're breasts were so ridiculously big that it bothered me. I feel like you can't like breasts THAT big and still like almost non-existent ones..

We both watch porn, I don't mind if he does, we share videos with each other regularly and I often see that he has a bunch of tabs of porn open when I sit next to him at his PC.

It's not like I expect him to only look at girls with breasts my size or smaller... but when they are like 4 cup sizes bigger, it bothers me.

Well that's a bad excuse, you can't just do something like that and tell someone they could have used the safe word. It's way of putting the blame on your side when clearly he held you down against your will. What he did is unacceptable, especially in this context.
Making hot chocolate afterwards doesn't make it less bad, he still did this to you. I hope this is a one time thing, abusive relationships are hard an you're better of making sure you're not part of one.
>The thing is.. I know it's not going to go away even if I left him..

So this might be an underlying problem, try and get help for this. Either irl if you're ready, or start looking for a forum/community to adress this. You can get over this, many people have, you're not the only one.
get out of that relationship asap, dont listen to his excuses, theyre bullshit. get far away and see a therapist.
Thank you.. unfortunately I don't think I can get help irl since I live in a shitty country, and help would be expensive. But I'll look for online communities.
At the moment.. I don't really have any intention of leaving him, I'm still trying to analyse what happened yesterday.

I can't ask friends for advice, because he reads the messages on my phone frequently, and don't want to upset him. That's why I'm here

Increased her bust size to a C from an A in about 3 years of rather dedicated regimen.

She has a youtube channel under the name Chiyomilk which documents her journey.

In reality, you should be happy with what you have, but some people will never EVER be happy due to whatever emotional trauma they may have. If so, perhaps you might be able to do something about it if you are dedicated enough.

It's definitely possible, but it sounds like she went through a lot of shit for it.

>physically torments you when you are already emotionally in pain
>physically hurts you
>gets mad if you go through his computer
>reads the messages on your phone frequently, gets mad if he sees something he doesn't like

>yells at you
>reads your messages
>hurts you
what the fuck is wrong with you? do you think so little of you that you feel like you're not worth more than him?
You're pathetic anonette, stuck in an abusive, unhealthy relationship with a guy who would rather wank to big tittied whores, goes through your phone, literally hurts you physically... and you go like
>i don't have any intention of leaving him :^)

/adv/ won't help for this kind of supreme stupidity
They say that women with low self-esteem are more likely to be in abusive relationships..so maybe that's my problem
Thread posts: 31
Thread images: 2

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