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So yesterday or two days ago I made a post about my boyfriends

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So yesterday or two days ago I made a post about my boyfriends phone. Apparently one of my friends saw him messaging this girl who flirts with him in class

I asked him today if I could go through his phone but he said no and defended his response with the classic "you're invading my privacy" and "it means no trust" response.

The few people I've talked about this with said that it was a bad sign, they all advised me to dump him because it's suspicious. I just need opinions on this.. Suggestions would help too
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Break up.
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>>16527192
I swear god that if a girl went through my phone without my permission I'd dump the shit out of her for starters. people need their own private space, just because he likes you doesn't mean he should bend over and take your dick up his fucking ass when it comes to everything in life.
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>>16527192
>oh no he talked to another human being i need to search all his belongings to ensure that the only human he ever contacts is me

are you building a pit in your basement to trap him inside too?

jesus christ
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>>16527226
We've been dating for nearly a year now
I have my reasons to be suspicious, it's not just because he's texting her that I want to look through his crap, she's implied having sex with him, and on top of that he tends to have mysterious behaviour

When I asked him to see his phone he immediately began to fidget and his attitude went upside down, it got to the point where I began to cry
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I'd suggest dropping it for now, but if he continues to act suspicious, then dump him. You have no solid evidence right now, and while you don't trust him 100%, I don't feel like you've reached enough of a level of distrust to dump him quite yet.
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>>16527192

I won't say "dump him", but I will say to get ready for heartache, and to be on the defensive. Trust is already gone, but respect for privacy is still there. If his reactions are like that, then I doubt you will have a long relationship. You could just dump him and that be that, if you're only in it for the long haul...
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>>16527246
>based on hearsay i want to make an ass of myself and get all flustered and dramatic over perfectly legal and acceptable behavior

do you go to the butchers and throw pigs blood on him when he is packaging meat for a customer?
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>>16527261
What?
I started crying because of his mood flip. He went from asking me what was wrong and encouraging me to completely putting me down for asking to look through it, then in the middle of it he unlocked it and tossed it at me

I should add though that I cry easily and after he did that I lost my shit
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>>16527279
>then in the middle of it he unlocked it and tossed it at me
so you got exactly what you wanted, yet you still whine AND completely ruined your relationship

no one cares about your tears

ironically your drama episode will likely lead to him actually fucking other women since he knows there is no more trust in your relationship
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Break up now before he breaks up, because you fucked up big time here.

At least I'd wanna break up if I was your boyfriend.
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>>16527246

So find a bf who is cool with your terms, simple, isn't it?
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Woah. Fuck you guys. I bet no one of you even talked to a girl.

And to you. If I were you instead if asking to go through his phone I would just ask him to sit down with me and talk about what is going on with him and what is going on with him and that girl. And why did he get so upset when you asked to go through his phone. Like yeah it wasn't right to ask that and I understand why he was upset and so but still it seems like too strong reaction.
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My gf is the same like your bf.
I knew i couldn't trust her so i went through her fb.
If your bf doesn't mind going through your stuff means he's really got nothing to hide. Or he could be really well prepared and left no evidence.
If he does mind obviously means he's got something to hide and doesnt trust you.
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>>16527279
>then in the middle of it he unlocked it and tossed it at me

what'd you expect? it's a shitty thing to ask
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>>16527411
>Woah. Fuck you guys. I bet no one of you even talked to a girl.

>i only know paranoid gossips
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>>16527279
>I asked if I could breach his privacy because I don't trust him
>He got annoyed at this so I started crying like a fucking child
>Then he conceded his privacy to me because I'm an annoying little spoiled brat with no sense of decency, giving me what I wanted
>This made me cry harder
Fucking hell. I pity that man.
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>>16527226
Cheater detected. Also your reading comprehension is piss poor because OP clearly said they ASKED to go through the phone.
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>>16527636
Should I ask him again?
It kept me up last night and I could hardly sleep. I really want to browse his pictures and contacts because I've seen pictures of other girls on there (creep shots) but I always waved it off as him trying to be funny with his friends
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>>16527631

Amen to this, well said.

OP, you're ridiculous. If I had a girlfriend like you, we'd have broken up about 45 minutes after that episode. People need their privacy. Like, what do you expect to gain from reading this? Odds are unless there's a message that says "hehe let's hook up," you're just going to end up reading a bunch of out of context stuff and getting more paranoid, then crying again because you lack emotional maturity.
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>>16527192
One thing you should know about /adv/ that it is 90% guys who think relationship problems are either caused by cheating or can be solved by cheating.
Posts like >>16527242 >>16527261 are shallow sissies who probably just defend him for cheating. If you expect it to be the worst, it probably is.
Every relationship is different and for some people it's normal to commit to a level where it's okay to check eachothers phone. Those people don't go to this site though.
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>>16528010
this is the reason why so many ppl on this board complain about no gf
breaking off a serious relationship because she has founded doubts is fucking retarded
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>>16528062

No, it's breaking off a relationship because she's too immature to be an adult about it and have a discussion about what exactly she's concerned about. Instead she relies on emotional blackmail, starts to cry and throw a baby tantrum until she gets what she wants, and then when she does, ratchets up her tantrum even more.

It's the kind of behavior that's going to continue later in the relationship, only it's going to be because he won't get up and take out the trash, or he wants to watch tv instead of take her out to dinner, what the fuck ever.

On a personal level, I set clear boundaries when I'm in a relationship together. Phones, email, and social media stay separate and private. There's too much room for interpretation if you let someone have unfettered access to that stuff.
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>>16527401


You will never build a solid realtionship if it is based on complete visibility on everything the other does.

Sometimes I have had to talk to friends about my girl to get their feedback. It isn't anything bad, but she doesn't need to read every communication I have with everyone. Nor do I want or feel I have a right to monitor everything she does.

But then again we both are I agreement that if either of us cheats it is done and over with. Point blank.
Thread posts: 24
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