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I've fucked up at Uni

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Earlier this semester I went through a rare depressive episode and stopped going to classes, and now out of my 4 classes this Semester, 2 I have fucked myself on by missing homework/projects.

The other 2 I can probably still pass if I make up a test or two I missed, and I will finish this Semester with a free 2 class credits thanks to Highschool college-credit classes.

My issue is that I don't know how to bring this up with my parents. I'm not relying on their money for college, but I still live with them and neither of them are understanding or very good at empathizing with others. So explaining to them why I'm only going to have 2 passing class grades is ruining my nerves, on top of other general college anxieties.

Has anyone been through something like this, or have advice on how to deal with people who don't give a shit about your issues? I see threads on here about people breaking news like this to others somewhat often.
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Just don't tell them?
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Medical withdrawl?
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your uni isn't going to mail a fucking report card to your parents, they only know what you tell them

if you think you can deal with this on your own and its not going to happen again then maybe it would be better to not tell them about it. However if you think this is going to happen again then maybe it would be best to take some time off from school and start going through therapy to cure your depression. That's what I did and I'm quite glad for it.
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>>16523477
They'll want to see my grades, and even if I logically point out that I'm the one putting myself in debt for it and it's not their business, it will just lead to screaming and fighting.
My parents are both very set in their ways, and they think college is just going to classes getting a job, and that if you have any problems babby jesus will fix them. Trying to talk about real things to them is like talking to a wall.

It especially doesn't help that the one thing I have going for me in the past has been that I'm considered smart, despite doing poorly in school for a few years. If I try to explain something like this to them they'll assume I'm falling back into my highschool ways
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>>16523494
>They'll want to see my grades, and even if I logically point out that I'm the one putting myself in debt for it and it's not their business
it is none of their business, stand your ground on this one
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>>16523494
Well I don't really see a way out of this if they want to see your grades. I guess you're just going to have to come clean and deal with their bitching
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>>16523488
My depression is almost entirely caused by my being chained to my parents and the very restrictive lifestyle/worldview they live in and try to enforce.

My parents could easily put out the money for me to go anywhere in the world and do anything I wanted, or have any kind of tools I'd need to do any work, but to them all you're supposed to do at my age is get a degree in college, get an office job and get married. If I don't follow precisely that formula, they effectively give up on me and try to push me into a shitty part-time job so I won't be at home bothering them.

On top of that, I have a dislike for psychologists on principle.
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>>16523502
I'm not trying to find a "way out", just looking for advice on how to deal with these kinds of people
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>>16523513
Just deal with their bitching? It's kind of hard to give advice with this if we don't have experience of what it's like to deal with them
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>>16523523
I pretty directly stated I was hoping there would be some other anons who had been through similar situations. I appreciate you trying to help though, but there were a lot of situations when I was younger where I had no option other than "deal with their bitching" and that's probably contributed a lot to my overall anxiety/depression.
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I was in a pretty similar situation my freshman year. I'm not proud, and particularly of late I've been feeling less and less comfortable being so, but I used to be extremely manipulative with them.
During all of my education 'till the end of HS my father was adamant on me getting good grades, he forced me to study during holidays, would ask to see my grades and so on.
I moved out for college, but still completely depending upon them. Our relationship got significantly better, but due to a wide array of problems including me beind very depressed, going through tough times because of feeling lonely and isolated, losing contact with friends, not playing the piano anymore, and, I admit, poor choices, I ended up with mediocre grades my first semester.
So as soon as I realized this I started 'getting them ready' for it. I also lied a bit on the values of each test and the results that I had on each test, so that on the two grades that I got a 7 remained a 7 but reflecting more effort or whatever (my school uses a numerical system with grades from 6 to 10 without decimals, anything below being a fail) and that I would have to take again because else I'd lose my scholarship.
I also told them how much of a hard time I was having, how high the dropout rates were (this is true, though, for the first semester, in several majors the dropout rate is as high as 70-80%), and how I had no idea, blah blah blah.
So when I gave them the news that I would have to take again two subjects they were rather understanding and not really angry (though dad was kind of disappointed, but whatever, really), And the next semester I ended up getting six 10s and one 9, so, yeah.
So, my advice to you would be in the short term to sort of "prepare" your parents for the news, and to soften them as much as possible (if possible fake your grades a bit or whatever), and then get help/work on solving your problems. Seriously, this is a truly minor issue compared to the shit you're getting into if
cont
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>>16523643
if you keep going through with all this crap you're carrying on your back. This isn't high school anymore, you're supposed to be here by choice, and while I perfectly understand that the situation that you find yourself in can happen for tons of reasons, many of which might not have you as a primary cause, you still need to fix them and you still need to take responsibility for them, because it's your life and only your life that is being fucked up by this. Seriously, you need to find a way to deal with all of this stuff. If you need to sit down with your parents and tell them all of this, do so. Even if it sounds like a bad idea, if you've been dealing with it for years you've probably tried many things which clearly haven't worked. After all you're their son, it must count for something.
And if you need to, take way less classes next semester, maybe even take it off if that's a possibility, but make sure that everything is oriented to getting your shit together rather than simply surviving each semester in academic terms.
Once you sort yourself out the rest will come naturally, trust me.
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>>16523473
Talk to the professors of the two you expect to fail. Tell them your story and see if there's any way to salvage the courses. If not, does your school have an "Incomplete" grade, and would the prof give you a chance to do some catch-up work over the next few months and get a delayed grade?

If not, can you withdraw and thus not fail the classes and affect your GPA?

If not, accept the two failures and devote yourself to salvaging the other two.

As for your parents, the truth is best "I went through a really bad patch back then, and fell so far behind that the best solution was to sacrifice those two classes to make sure I did well in the other two."
Thread posts: 14
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