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TL;DR version: i invited a guy to go with me on vacation thinking

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TL;DR version: i invited a guy to go with me on vacation thinking he wouldn't accept or that my friends wouldn't bail on me. my friends ended up bailing on me and now i'm going on vacation with a guy who i don't know very well and he's starting to creep me out. wat do?

long version: i've been planning on going on vacation and wanted to get a good group to go with me, so i invited all my friends. well one by one they started flaking out, most of them couldn't afford it which is understandable.
i was at a work party and started ranting about this to another coworker, and i was like "so would you want to go with me??" and he was like "yeah totally!" and i thought he wasn't serious. turns out he bought the plane ticket and everything.
i'm female and he's male, and i originally planned to stay in dorm hostels and am going to stick to that plan, but he keeps pushing on getting a private room because of "noise" and "partiers." (wtf is the point of going on vacation if you can't party?)
so not only does that weird me out a little bit, but it's also the fact that he barely talks at all and is also a big guy who used to be in the army.
what the fuck do i do? at this point it's too late to refund tickets.
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>>16519527
you made your bed, now you get to lie in it.

with a creepy dude, most likely.
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>>16519532
if he gets me in bed i'm going to be kicking and screaming. not in a good way.

is there any advice or am i screwed?
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You literally invited some guy to go with you on vacation, and you want to bail on him because he wants to sleep with you, which is the natural idea when YOU invited him to go on vacation.

Go fuck yourself. Make it clear asap that you fucked up big time and said shit carelessly.

Honestly go fuck yourself OP.
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>>16519669
would you say the same thing if i had other friends going along with me? because that's literally what happened. i planned to get a huge group together and everyone bailed but him.
also "natural idea?" get a fucking grip lmfao. not every woman who invites you to things wants to fuck you or gives you the right to rape her.
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>>16519700
try and talk to him and say that you are uncomfortable with the idea of sharing a room with him, most reasonable guys should be capable of respecting that

good luck op. bring a weapon maybe
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is there anyone else you can invite op?
Try to get a different group of ppl to join.
Otherwise, set clear boundaries like "I need to sleep in my own bed" or "this stuff is mine don't touch it ever"

Also, who cares what he wants? This is YOUR trip. Tell him your staying at the hostile and that he's welcome to stay in it too if he wants. Don't ruin your experience because of some stick in the mud
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>>16519700
Was he a creep at all before you invited him?

also >>16519669 is kinda right on the aspect of men thinking "she invited me on her vacation with close friends, and we would be staying in a hotel, somethings up"

also nobody said anything about rape
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>>16519707
thanks. i want to bring a stun gun but i'm only bringing a carry on so i wouldn't be able to get it through security :\

>>16519711
i've invited basically everyone i know. thanks for your comment, it calmed me down a bit. my anxiety hasn't been this bad in a long time. other people (not just here) are saying they would expect sex if a girl invited them somewhere, or that i owe him sex now and i basically had a panic attack. at least i learned the hard way i guess.
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>>16519713
i wouldn't say he was a creep. i've been on a snowboarding trip with him once but there were other people with us so it was fun. it only got weird when he kept pushing to get a private room, and then i realized how quiet and mysterious he is and how i barely know him.
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He's not going to rape you, stop thinking everyone who isn't a Chad Thundercock is "eww omg so creepy".

Women are stupid.
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>>16519726
You don't ever, ever, EVER owe anybody sex.

I know what that feels like though and I have dispensed with sex I didn't want to give because I felt like I was obligated to. THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS

I would tell him in no uncertain terms (by text or email if it's easier) that you are absolutely not going to be sharing a private room, you aren't interested in that, and don't want him to get the wrong idea about your invitation to vacation with you. Maybe he wants a private room still just for himself, that's ok too. But you won't be rooming with him under those conditions. Maybe even toss in how you really want the hostel party experience and you're not looking for a quiet getaway with a companion of the opposite sex.

Any rate, sorry your friends all bailed, I know that feeling.
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>>16519726
You in no way owe him sex. HE is in the wrong if he has that expectation, and he should never act in a way that crosses a boundary that you've drawn.
That being said, make your boundaries clear so that he understands how to respect them.

dont worry, this might be a great chance for you to become friends with this guy. Your anxiety+other people sexualizing the situation is probably making you a little nervous-
This guy is probably fine and I doubt he'll try to cross any lines- and if he does, you can just leave and enjoy the trip on your own and make new friends.
Don't worry. Make your boundaries clear, even if you have to phrase it like "sorry, I'm kinda wierd about ______" or "I have this thing about _____"

Does this guy have any friends that maybe he could get to come? I know that's kinda wierd to be in a group with ppl you don't know, but you'll make a lot of new friends and that way it won't be wierd that it's just the two of you
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>>16519736
even if he was by you definition a """CHAD"""" i still wouldn't want him to get the wrong idea and think i owe him sex because i was nice and invited him somewhere. i don't hook up, period. especially with someone i hardly know.
men are stupid in the first place for thinking girl being nice to them = she wants to fuck.

>>16519737
thanks and i'm sorry you had to go through that. i truly am. if he continues to push the room thing, i'm going to just flat out tell him that's not going to happen, and i do want the whole hostel party experience. like i said, i'm not interested in hooking up, the best part about vacation is making friends you will probably never see again.
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Why don't you just have sex with him?

What's so bad about that? If he barely talks (perhaps just to you or other girls) at all, he probably has had very little sex or he's still a virgin. He probably has a lot of psychological issues resulting from lack of female companionship, including lack of confidence with girls.

You would make him feel a whole lot better about himself probably. If you think giving food to the homeless or donating to charity is a good thing then why not have sex with have?
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>>16519789
>men are stupid in the first place for thinking girl being nice to them = she wants to fuck.

Women are stupid for believing that any man just wants to be friends with them.
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>>16519789
you are totally right anon, I forgot when I'm nice to women they just think im being a gentleman, but when I invite them out to a hotel on a vacation im also simply being a gentleman.

Im not saying you have to fuck the guy, but shit this is really your fault to begin with. Draw the line, or tell him you guys arent going on the trip.
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>>16519800
because having sex makes me feel disgusting and trashy and i'm scared of intimacy. i don't want someone seeing me naked, ew. much less, a person i work with.
not only would i feel disgusting, but i would be called a whore. he can get the same pleasure from just using his hand. i don't see the problem.
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>>16519822
Fine I can understand that.

>he can get the same pleasure from just using his hand

But wait are women actually this dumb?
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>>16519810
good to know. i'll block all my male friends asap after this trip.

>>16519816
how is it my fault this guy can't control his dick?
i was literally just trying to be a friend.
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>>16519828
women don't know what it's like to have a dick. how does that make us dumb?
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Girl, you're asking for this kind of advice on the most mysogine place on the Internet. Almost every man here feels entitled to sex and simply cannot understand that women might want his companipnship without him trying to shove his penis inside them.

My advice is:
1) try to get more people to come. Even if it is one friend, it will break the ice.
2) make him know how disapppinted you are that your friends flaked, and that you have no intention of... This kind of thing while on the trip.
3) the worst case scenario is him being a bad company, only there because he thought you would give him sex in exchange of his company. Them you flake him and go have fun on your on.
4) if he keeps insisting, ask him if he has any intents with you, and tell him that travelling alone wasn't your plan on the first place
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>>16519837
If you had common sense you could imagine what it's like to some extent, or at least realize a vagina would feel a million times better than your hand.

Imagine having a very large clitoris.

>>16519830
>how is it my fault this guy can't control his dick?

1) Guy accepts your invitation to a vacation
2) Says he wants to get a private room due to noise concerns
3) Says nothing that he implies he wants to have sex with you

>omg why can't he control his dick? I know he just wants to fuck this hot 10/10 poosy
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honestly there is no more meaningful discussion here, OP question was answered, and is now expecting a hugbox while projecting her own bias opinions and arguing with who don't agree with her.
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You just have to come clean, OP.
Poor co-worker got his hopes up
>>16519867
/thread
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>>16519855
most people here are saying he wants to fuck though, and that i basically invited him to fuck. did you read the thread? just curious.

>>16519848
thanks. i probably shouldn't have posted here, but it really shows the true colors of a majority of men. i really had no one else to talk to, and coming here has just made me feel worse (in b4 good, i hope you die alone, blah blah blah). my anxiety is still pretty bad. i keep thinking like, what if he gets so angry he hurts me or something. i have no idea what this guy is capable of, and he's buff.
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>>16519867
people were hostile to me in this thread and you're saying i'm creating a "hugbox" because i'm defending myself. okay.
i don't understand why you posted.
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>>16519873
>most people here are saying he wants to fuck though
> did you read the thread?

Do you know where you are? Women are actually this stupid.

>i keep thinking like, what if he gets so angry he hurts me or something. i have no idea what this guy is capable of, and he's buff.

This is how normal interaction with men turn into "eww omg he's like so creepy and he's gonna raep me"

Women are this stupid.
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Can quote posts on this phone app, so whatever.
OP, I understand you are afraid. In your place I wouldn't discard the possibility of lying and saying I can't go anymore, if I felt threatened enough.

However, I doubt he will do anything. You two will probably not be alone at any time, and you don't even have to spend time out with him if he makes you uncomfortable
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lol these kind of threads just prove how fucking easy is to be a man. You guys can't even understand why she would be afraid of this man hurting her
It must be nice living like that, being so oblivious to violence of this kind
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And OP... Don't wanna be rude, but don't invite people to serious stuff like that, in the spurr on the moment, again. You never know when they might actuallly accept and go through with it, and you'll probably regret.
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>>16519890
my fucking sides!
>You guys can't even understand why she would be afraid of this man hurting her
She literally invited the man herself to the trip!
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>>16519890
>lol these kind of threads just prove how fucking easy is to be a man.

It's a million times easier to be a woman. You don't even have to do anything in life, you can just get married and have a man take care of you your entire life. Government assistance helps you more than men too. If you're ever on a sinking ship, who gets on the lifeboats first? Women and children. That goes for most aspects of life, women are more valuable than men just for existing. A man is disposable and treated like garbage unless he proves himself.

>You guys can't even understand why she would be afraid of this man hurting her

I understand that it's most likely completely irrational. See: >>16519855

It must suck living in a fantasy world thinking every man just wants to rape you.
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>>16519900
And he started to show signs of wanting stuff that she didn't offered, and now she's afraid that he might try to take it by force. Which he can do, since he is bigger and stronger.
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>>16519905
>And he started to show signs of wanting stuff that she didn't offered

Like what?

>and now she's afraid that he might try to take it by force.

Which is completely irrational and there's no good reason to believe he would do that. If he rapes her everyone would know about it and he would go to prison too.
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>>16519902
Oh, that old argument... "men created everything!", "men die at war!", "women get saved first!", therefore being a woman is easy mode.

1) Women don't like being treated as frail, interior beings that need special treatment, unlike the internet tells you
2) I see a lot of times you had to die at sinking ships in order to save women. You're such a brave man warrior! Men all over the world are proud!
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>>16519905
Then why not cancel the trip? disinvite him? OP never said she even considered doing these things, even though they are simple and easy. Unless shes so fearful that telling him the trip is canceled because all her friends couldnt go, would induce a near instant rape hormone to go haywire in his body causing the worst of our fears.
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>>16519910
Like wanting to share a room. There are some socially implicit rules about males and females being alone.
Remember that when she invited him, they would Not be alone.

Also, full blown rape is only the worse that can happen. Him being a pain in the ass and being passive agressive because she refused sex would make her uncomfortable and ruin the trip
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>>16519915
That's what I would do in her place, I wouldn't feel fine going in this circunstances
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>>16519527
cancel your trip. Do not go on vacation. Do not pass go, do not collect beach party with backpackers.

Seriously, think of it as a punishment x life lesson combo: don't write mouth checks your butt can't cash, ever.
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>>16519912
> "men created everything!", "men die at war!"

I never said these things, so this is a strawman argument. However it is true that throughout history almost every great invention was created by men, primarily white and East Asian men. Women like Grace Hopper who actually make big accomplishments are very rare.

>therefore being a woman is easy mode.

It is certainly easier than being a man at least.

>1) Women don't like being treated as frail, interior beings that need special treatment, unlike the internet tells you

People treat you more gently and with more care? How horrible, I didn't know you had it so hard.

>2) I see a lot of times you had to die at sinking ships in order to save women. You're such a brave man warrior! Men all over the world are proud!

What point are you trying to make here? You're just kind of personally attacking me and saying I've never saved a damsel in distress.
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>>16519919
read OP's post again

Pretty sure when she did invite them, they would be alone, seeing as she was ranting about all of her friends flaking out.

But sure him being a dick because he was under the wrong assumption, also assuming there is any man out there that wouldnt be under that assumption.
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OP, just be honest and tell him you fucked up, that you expected more people to come and you don't want to have a private room with him. He will think you're some kind of stupid bitch, but you don't care, that's what you appear to be ITT as well.

Alternatively tell about it to one your friend and offer to pay part of their trip to make him/her come along. It'll be your punishment for being retarded.

You already dun goofed enough desu
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>>16519890
>how fucking easy it is to be a man

>overwhelming majority of suicide cases: men
>overwhelming majority of homeless: men
>majority of prison population: men
>majority of victims of violence (outside of domestic violence): men

yay, life on easy mode!
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>>16519902

> You don't even have to do anything in life, you can just get married and have a man take care of you your entire life

No, that's not an option of the vast majority of women.

>Government assistance helps you more than men too

Government assistance is for kids, since we're the only ones who take care of them.

>If you're ever on a sinking ship, who gets on the lifeboats first? Women and children

That hasn't been protocol for 50 years.

>A man is disposable and treated like garbage unless he proves himself.

No, a man gets to act like an entitled selfish baby for his entire life and then whine how he's a victim.
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>>16519948

>Men fuck up
>BOO HOO THE POOR MEN

Not to mention all that violence done on men is done by other men, while the majority of violence done to women is also by men, but yeah you sure do have it hard.
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>>16519963
But its not like men made all the polices and social norms that lead to men having a shit life oh wait yes they did. Fucking MRA idiots.
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>>16519527
I bet if OP thought he was hot, this thread wouldn't even exist. How easy life must be when your attractive. Only invite men you would fuck; all problems solved.
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>>16519967

NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND WHEN MEN COMITTE CRIMES

THEY GO TO PRISON

FUCKING FEMINISTS WITH THEIR BULLSHIT LAWS AND JUSTICE AND PRISONS REEEEEEEEEE
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>>16519923
Yes all of this. Lesson learned.
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Biggest beta orbiter bait in a while.

At least try to be courteous and inform him that you just invited him as a friend and don't let the poor chap pay for your stuff.
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>>16519800
nah women would rather want men to span from the loneliness and become shooter then throw in him a bone.
Thread posts: 52
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