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Forgiving A Cheater

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Thread replies: 23
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Those of you who have stayed with a cheating S/O, how did you do it? Was it worth it?
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>>16512746

You don't. It's not worth it. Get some self-respect anon, why are you even contemplating this?
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>>16512747
They told they regretted it completely, would change, never do it again, and do anything to get another chance.
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>>16512763

Anon let me ask you something. If you had a dog or an animal you really loved would you ever shoot it? No? Well, would you point an aimed gun at it just for fun?

Now then, imagine your ex being the dog and the gun being someone who you know is interested in you, would you hang out with them willingly knowing what kind of trouble it could potentially create?

My entire point is your ex doesn't respect you and didn't respect you by doing that. That will NEVER change anon, come to terms with that right now. If they ate shit before, they're going to keep eating shit. They will not suddenly treat you like a wonderful person they hurt, instead they will realize that they can get away with doing anything and you will meekly go "o-o-ok" so long as they make a flowery apology with lots of tears.

If they "regret" it so bad they would never have done it in the first place. You shouldn't ever do what you're thinking about doing anon, grow a spine.
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>>16512763
Make them do some humiliating sexual shit then dump them anyways

Its the right thing to do
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>>16512781
A brilliant man, ahead of his time. Listen to him.
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This board is nothing but kucks.

You either consider it or you don't Iearn Iike this guy

>>16508724

What is wrong with you peopIe?

>lt happened once, but you think it'II suddenIy be impossibIe to ever happen again

>Rather than just enjoying one of the other biIIions of the opposite gender out there

You're faiIing yourseIf and have no one eIse to bIame for aII that happens after.
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>>16512781

Good advice.
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No it wasn't worth it. I forgave him because I was madly in love with him, but it didn't take much longer for him to break up with me. He spent time with others intimately and when he went back to his ex last June I just had enough and knew who he was better off with. Took me a while but in April I just completely gave up on the stupid idea of "us"
Dude should hurry up and just get back together with her instead of playing games and both of them beating around the bush. That girl changed a lot of things just to show her love for him
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>>16512746

Well op, there's a reason for everything. Why do you think she/he cheated on you? Something wrong with you or you may of dated the wrong person, ignoring red flags.
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No it was not worth it. She cheated on me with her ex several times during out relationship. The worse part is we didn't use condoms so I'm 100% sure when she cheated she didn't use protection. So I had to get myself checked to be on the safe side. Even after all of that she confessed to me of her wrong doings I already knew before hand and chose to stay rather than confront her. The most disturbing thing was before I discovered she was sneaking around on me I'm almost positive there was a time I went down on her when she just finished having sex with the guy. Fast forward 6 months later, she begs to take her back...like an idiot I go for it and now we have a place together. So sure enough wouldn't you believe she is cheating on me again and on thanksgiving the relationship ended. Now we are still in this apartment trying to piece together how to leave.
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Yeah i stayed with a gf who cheated on me multiple times. she never changed. i don't think many people do.
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>gets cheated on
>stays

I swear this board is one big meme
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>>16513401
Whose lease is it
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>>16513453
Both of our names are on it. So now she is trying to get a job after not working for 2 years and find a place to stay. I don't see how she is gonna do it when she doesn't have an education or any particular skills other than working in a call center.
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Christ where do u ppl live? I can't even get laid one single time.

Iono, I suggest camgirls.
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No. Here are 2 stories of why you shouldn't.

My bf of 4 years emotionally, and most likely physically, cheated on me with his ex-gf for 1.5 years of our relationship. I forgave him. This taught me that I am capable of forgiving someone, but this is also showed me that he would never change. I found a thong in my bed a month later, and years later, he even left me to fuck his employee. He's a drunk with no friends now.

My current bf was with his ex-wife for 7 years. She cheated on him within the first 4 months of their relationship, got pregnant by another guy, and the guy said "fuck you" to his daughter. My bf adopts the daughter, has his own daughter with his ex-wife. She proceeds to cheat on him 3 more fucking times. He adopted her daughter so she would have a father, forgives her for cheating, and she proceeds to dick his friend behind his back. Incredible, right?

It's true. Cheaters actually never change. For what will be a few minutes of sexual pleasure, they are willing to throw away a lifetime of love and trust. They don't respect you, and you should definitely walk away. I regret not walking away the first time and I know my bf regrets his ex, too.
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No it wasn't worth it. Not at all. Don't ever forgive a cheater. I wasted years of my life with a cheater. Don't do it.
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>>16512781
Patrice O'Neal kind of had some advice similar to this. He said that if his woman ever cheated on him, she'd lose all say in everything. He would absolutely make her do shit and it would only end when she finally walked away from him, all respect gone.
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It's not worth it. You should have been worth it to them not to cheat, if not, it shows a clear inequality of feelings and commitment to the relationship.

Trust is gone and it will always be in the back of your mind when they do anything without you.
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I did, and it was worth it, though the circumstances of my case were highly unusual. I don't want to talk about that.

That said, it took some 3-4 years of conscious and deliberate action. Every time the old fears came up, I had to say to myself "No, I refuse to distrust her" (not out loud, of course) and then shut them down. At first, I had to do this quite frequently. It faded with time, but not before I developed triggers that brought on what I called "aftershocks" in full force. I've since dealt with those, but that was also a slow and painful process.

It was worth it, even with the hell afterward. But I also recognize that it isn't for everyone, or for every situation. With doubts like OP's, I'm not sure it would be feasible.
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>>16513537
Here's another hilariously sad story of keeping a cheater:
>guy cheats on gf with his employee
>gf dumps him
>he begs for her back
>she goes full psycho: makes him tell his family why she dumped him, all his friends too. puts him through the fucking wringer.
>they get back together and she demands a baby
>they have a baby and move in together
>now they share a Facebook so she can watch what he is doing at all times
>bitch literally has him by the balls and he's miserable

Sometimes staying together isn't the best idea after cheating. Especially if you're an immature idiot like that girl.
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>>16512746
>how did you do it?
I lowered my self esteem.
>Was it worth it?
Nope!
Thread posts: 23
Thread images: 3


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