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I'm bad at being intimate and talking about myself, how do I get better?
I've always been really afraid of opening up to other people and actually talking about myself because of self worth issues, but lately I've been really trying to change that.
However I find that I'm not nearly as good at speaking in this context than I am in others
I stutter and lose track of how my words should flow and don't really have a good sense of how much to actually say before I'm either burdening/bragging to/boring the other person
any advice?
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>>16509867
people generally dont want to hear about ur problems or inner thoughts etc.
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>>16509873
That's what I've always thought but I very frequently get pushed in conversations to talk about myself and used to just deflect and make it about the other person again to avoid having to speak about me
I kind of started to feel like that isn't normal though, was I wrong?
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>>16509867
Don't bother about opening up to people.
It's usually women that force us to open up, but it's not because they care about you. They just want as much info as possible to throw it in your face later on in the relationship.
For example: You tell her about your problems with your father and you get emotional and you tear up.
The next time you'll have a fight with her she'll bring that up, telling you that you have daddy issues.
Women will shit into your heart.
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>>16509950
o-oh...
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bump?
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Damn thought it was a avalanches thread
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>>16509867
recognize that there's a line between the really deep dark shit and just talking about how you feel on the surface or even sort of mid level.
no one wants to hear about your deep dark shit because they're dealing with their own deep dark shit.
everyone has baggage, not many people want yours. you don't want theirs either, though.
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>>16509955
He's bitter and full of shit, ignore him.
What you have to do is ensure that you're talking to the right person. A while back I had a friend of mine gradually open up about a sizeable backlog of issues that she'd been carrying for a while. It transpired that every time she'd tried to open up about it to someone the person in question would back off because they didn't want to deal with her baggage (this was back in high school, where people weren't mature enough to handle it), and it was clear from her behaviour that even being able to talk to someone about it and have them listen was a major load off her mind.
So basically, pick your shoulder to cry on.
>>16510453
Is pretty on point. People asking about you are asking about less serious character traits. Not many people will want to hear about deep stuff, but someone that cares enough about you will (and vice versa).
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