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A girl stopped talking to me after we spend most of our time

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A girl stopped talking to me after we spend most of our time together for months
I pressured her to tell me what was up, and turns out she got tired of me after spending too much time with me.
I lost my cool a little and told her stuff like "that's shitty of you" "it's annoying as fuck" and asked her to meet up to talk it over.

It's been three days since I saw her, and one week since she stopped talking to me. And now that I think about it I think I made a huge deal out of a perfectly normal situation. Now will it play a lot in the process of recovering her, or not ? I'm just afraid I'll have to wait for a long ass time, worse, that it's over forever.
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leave her alone dude
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Millions of girls in the world
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Keeping in mind that, when we saw each other, we kinda laughed it off, like we joked about the situation and ended up saying we'll have to wait until she's not tired of me anymore.
>>16503431
I already did, I stopped talking to her as soon as I understood she "got tired",but I'm still hoping that she'll come back as I made a circle of friends through her and that I like being around her
(I was afraid of these kind of reactions since /adv/ is "just drop this girl" general)
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>>16503444
Don't worry man I never said I'll stop living and meeting girls because of the situation quite the opposite actually, I'm planning on meeting a whole lot of new people starting now.
But that's not the issue at hand.
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I wasn't there so I don't know if you overreacted but I think you acted in the right direction. It's normal to be displeased at her behavior. She didn't handle a relationship correctly and as a result she hurt you. When people seek relationships they're supposed to reflect on what they want. They're supposed to know what they want. Your girlfriend is also supposed to know what she wants, she's supposed to spend time with you when she likes it and pursue her own interests when she feels like doing other things. She shouldn't spend *too much* time with you and then get tired and stop talking to you. That's not how it works. It's like she doesn't pay attention to her mood or her feelings and just wants to blame you.

I understand that it's an unhappy turn of event when you push away someone that you cherish but you need to be careful. Do you want to "recover" her badly enough to ignore this issue? Your relationship won't have any actual healing unless she accepts that she fucked up, otherwise you'll just be waiting until she hurts you again.
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>girl doesn't like me
>get mad and yell at her

Did i do good adv? :)


you should have instantly said "hmm ok" and moved on right there. you are a child. just wait until you are done grieving the loss of her friendship, and THEN reach back out. This ensures that 1. She is over whatever she needs to get over and 2. that you're not acting irrationally based on emotion
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>>16503476
Oh sorry I forgot to add that she feels bad about it, I had to really press hard for her to spill the bean and then when we saw each other she kept saying "its not your fault" "its out of my control" "im so ashamed" (kept repeating this one) "i feel so bad" "so sorry" etc etc...
>>16503483
Yeah you're right on this one, I should wait until logic takes over my emotions on the matter.
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honestly saying "im tired of seeing you" is a pretty big dick move, i cant see why anyone saying exactly that deserves any kind of reaction except an angry person. that shit is just rude.

obviously i dont know the exact parameters of you, your relationship, or her, but anyone saying that to me would immediately get das boot. i have no room in my brain for someone who considers me a waste of time.

and to all the folks here giving this guy shit, your advice is fair, but please think about just how disrespectful it is to completely disregard a person's importance. so what if she was pressed to say it? it's still what she thinks, and she still said it, could've made up something else. and she is still a dbag for thinking that. IMO op you should just move on, she sounds like a bad person
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>>16503518
op admitted he pressured her into telling him 'why'. don't be an aspie and ask for the truth if you can't handle it. sure it's a rude thing to say, but it's what op asked for.

>she is still a dbag for thinking that
>you're obligated to like everyone you meet forever

smdh
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>>16503539
you're NOT obliged to be like everyone, but it also makes 0 fuckin sense to even bother with someone who calls you a waste of their time. sorry but i think it is just 100% wacko life steering in the wrong direction kind of decision making to want to still hang around with a person who thinks that about you. everyone is entitled to their real human feelings both as aggressor and receiver. that means while she is entitled to thinking "i dont want to see him anymore" he is also entitled to thinking "that was mean, i dont want to see her anymore either". everyone should love themselves enough to not take it lying down when someone calls them a waste of time, whether pressured or not. and that doesnt mean getting angry necessarily, it does mean getting out of a relationship if they want to
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>>16503623
I really don't want to defend her but I think I should be clear on some things.

1.She didn't exactly use the words "get tired of", her exact words were : "I'm starting to find you annoying and I don't know why, I can't help it"

2.She did this exact same thing two years ago but I didn't think much of it because I didn't care about her back then and I had the exact same reaction >>16503483 advised.

3.I'm 100% sure she does NOT see me as a waste of time. How can I be so sure ? Like I said we were hanging out all the time, but what I didn't say is that she was the one calling me up to hang out at her apartment/my apartment/etc..., she was the one who wanted to spend a lot of time with me most of the time.

But like I said too, I kind of understand her feelings, you know, when you go on vacations with a friend for like a week or two and when you get back you really don't want to see him anymore ? It doesn't mean you hate him, or anything, just that you can't be around him for a while.
I think it's like that. But that's my take on the matter.

Sorry if this story is uninterresting and too complicated, but I writing it down helps me step back and think more rationally.
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as it seems this problem isn't as bad as I first presumed.

how old are you both? as in, in what part of life are you both? I think I can realy crack this thing, but I'd need mo' info yo.

(why I asked the question^^^): try to get drunk with her, or like, realy stoned. just not sober. but I mean like, realy very drunk, fun drunk, maybe too drunk. literaly all of my friends and I are friends, because we get drunk together.

just a thought: she COULD have an image in her head about you that's maybe realy cringy for her or just wrong or whatever, and she can't get it out of her head when you are around. it would explain the "I don't know why, I can't help it.".
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>>16503805
both 18 and 19 really soon
we are friends because we enjoyed smoking together back in high school (she doesn't drink), I would invite her to smoke BUT SHE STOPPED TALKING TO ME.
And your hypotesis may not be wrong but really at this point everything is conjecture. I must add that when I saw her the point was exactly to understand what was bugging her, and she insisted numerous time that she had not idea what was causing it to use her words "I really don't know man, I pick up random small details and I find them strangely annoying and I don't know why you could start blowing your nose and it would annoy me for no reason"
She said she didn't want to stop talking to me and she wished she didn't feel that way.
She agreed when I said we'll just have to wait until she feels better about me.

I'm trying to add as much details as I can.
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Dang son, tuff one.
Ever thought maybe you wheren't supposed to be friends at all? Even how good they are, friends sometimes come and go. Sure it doesn't solve the problem I know, .. But. As far as I can tell, it almost never happens you make friends for life when you're under 16y/o. At your 'stage' it's time to start searching for friends that'll always keep being your friends, I hope for you she'll be in that group. But hey, she's a grill, can't do nothing about that..

There is absolutely no sexual tension between you 2 I guess?
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>>16503422
Not just girls but guys get like that. My boyfriend wants to spend all of his time with me but I honestly get tired of him sometimes because I need me time which is perfectly normal. I don't think it's healthy to spend all of your time together either. You to spend time away to really miss each other and appreciate the other person's company.
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