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Money inequality in a relationship

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My boyfriend is still a student, and as a result has very little money. I've already graduated, and thus have much more money than he does. Right now we share a very small apartment with a third person.

I was thinking of getting a bigger, nicer place. I already know he wouldn't be able to really pitch in on the rent, so I'm thinking that I'd just pay it, instead of splitting stuff.

I floated this idea past a friend of mine, who warned me that it was a bad idea. Living in this kind of arrangement would make it obvious to him that he wouldn't be able to pay his share, and would eat at him. I already pay for things when we go out to eat at fancier places, though he pitches in when he can.

Should I continue to live in a smallish apartment if it means that my bf can split the rent with me, or should I go for something nicer, and just pay for it all? Is it a problem if I pay for a bunch of the stuff in our relationship? I don't mind doing it at all, but I don't want to make him feel like dead weight.

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I think it's wiser to stay where he can afford. hes a student so it will get better but it is going to be problematic for him to get into a situation he can't pull his weight in.
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>>16474393
>Is it a problem if I pay for a bunch of the stuff in our relationship?
Do you want to be his mom or something? Do you have self confidence issues? How far along is this relationship?
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Some guys think it's emasculating, others love to be treated. If the roles were swapped there wouldn't be nearly as much debate.

Only you know him. Ask him how the money thing feels to him.
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>>16474428
...of course I don't want to be his mom. I don't have self-confidence issues, and 8 months.
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when a guy pays for his girl it's considered normal...
you could move to a place that you can afford on your own if shit hits the fan, but let him chip in the amount he would normally pay for a student room... that way even if you take your love for him out of the equation it's a deal that benefits you both. like neither of you would really depend on the other (you have an appartment, he has a room) but you do have the synergistic benefits of living together.

Or... stay where you are and wait a bit, perhaps kick the third person out...
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Nevermind the retarde considerations of male pride, who gives a shit about that

The problem is that your solution is not practical for him OP.

In the event you guys break up, he'll literally be homeless since you'll be paying the whole rent of "his" place. You'll probably want him gone, too.

If you guys share the rent of your place at the very least he'll be entitled to his spot untill one of you finds a new place.

Always account for the worst case scenario OP especially when you're this young, you cannot expect this relationship to last eternally.
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>>16474393
>>16474428

Don't listen to this poster, OP . I sense a rotten bitch with the potential to ruin a 8 month relationship.


I think you should communicate your feelings with your boyfriend. If he's anything like the insecure boys on 4chan he might get worried you'll leave him for a man with more money who is more established.

I don't think there's anything wrong with you covering the majority of expenses given the fact that you graduated and your boyfriend didn't.
Whose to say it wouldn't be the other way around if he had graduated first?

Also, I'd like to point out that if the person paying for most of the shit was a man and his girlfriend was still in school, this wouldn't be a thread because GENDER ROLES
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>>16474393
In the 21st century when it is more and more common for women to make more than their mates, this issue should become less of a problem.

You really have to judge by your knowledge of him. Objectively there's nothing wrong with your paying for more, but can his dignity and manhood handle it? And will you be able to resist rubbing his nose in it when you argue?

Present it as a pay-what-you-can plan. He continues to pay what he's paying now, and as his income increases so does his share of the rent, until he's supporting you.
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If the genderd were reversed there wouldn't be a problem, huh? Don't be hipocrites people.
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>>16474393
OP I was in a similar, opposite position (boyfriend had the money, I was a student) and I broke up with him because I felt like I was being "babied" and it felt weird and he didn't make me feel like a autonomous independent person. Then again, my brother wants nothing more than a sugar mama paying for all his shit lmao so maybe your bf is more like that? idk

>>16474443
This pretty much ask him
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I was the guy in this exact situation. I followed the family tradition of military service before education.

So I met a girl, and she moved in with me, then we moved to a new place where she covered the majority of our expenses (being the bread winner that she was) I don't know about your relationship but with ours being the only one with life experience meant I did all the cleaning, house/yard work, ironing and cooking. We literally reversed the roles. I still felt bad about not being able to contribute enough but I was confident in the idea that when my studies was over we could meet some kind of balance and I would make it up to her.

So I'd recommend talking to him and saying that when he's done his studies he can chip in some extra until you guys are back to a comfortable medium

(that girl turned out to be a massive bitch and told me I was a lesser man because I wasn't buying her gifts, taking her to fancy restaurants and other shit like that, dropped her, she's now back with her parents and has gained like 40 lbs because she doesn't know how to look after herself)
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