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How's your life going?

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How's your life going?
>>
Bummer. I'm joining the Army but I'm really worried my family (mother/father/sister) is going to fall apart without my presence.
>>
Good, but I'm scared of getting older / dying.

The thought of just disappearing completely one day is terrifying because I am an utter control freak, and this is the ultimate loss of control.

The worst part is that I'm only 25, but this fear hits me like a crippling boulder nearly every single night.

I think I have OCD / depression / anxiety but I'm too nervous to seek professional help.

How are you?
>>
Not well. I am only 21 just finished college with a 3.9 GPA worked hard and now I am getting engaged to my boyfriend in the airforce and throwing away my chances in the career I went to school for. I feel like my life is over at such a young age. The area I am moving to is rural and there is no hope for me I will end up doing a job that goes against my values more than likely doing adminstration being a dumb bimbo doing nothing with my life.
>>
It's all bad, man. It's hard to find a job and I can't find people who, like, get me, and stuff. It's a real bummer.
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>>16460534
I feel you Anon. The mention of death does a number on me too.
>>
>>16460542

You're only getting engaged. You can hold off on actually getting married for a long ass time.

No reason you need to throw away your career unless you have a kid right away or something (which is obviously your choice as well). Why are you moving to the middle of nowhere?

>>16460549

People on 4chan get you, that's enough for me. I don't have many friends IRL either but I can still go online 24 hours a day and converse with people online which is always a good feeling.
>>
Pretty bad. Real bad.
>>
Good
>straight a's (more on that later)
>invited to parties now, one tomorrow I'm going to
>hung out with people today

Bad
>failed physics test, but had high enough A to keep it barely
>danced with a girl earlier because of an aquitance ... Sort of knew her . It was awkward , neither of us wanted to , the song was slow and unusually long , and we didn't look at each other . I felt her pain too, lol.
>fighting nofap
>>
>>16460558
We have to get married by spring inorder to live together. I love my boyfriend a lot but I feel like I am throwing my dreams away for him. He is finished his training and its easier for married couples to get marriage quaters. I have no plans to have kids my future was to be with him travel and have a career where I can leave my mark on the world. The area he is getting transfered to there is no job market for entry level positions in my feild I have been looking for a couple weeks now. We guessed it be that area and it was sadly. He wants to get me a civilian job on the base but none of those jobs interest me.

I have a lot of health problems and disabilities so working a normal job I hate will really take a toll on me. I can put up with my problems if it is something I enjoy or are neutral about but not if I hate it. I do not want to get stuck in a sterotypical female job like administration.
>>
pretty bad right now. I had a good paying job at a bank, recently quit because it was soul crushing. Now I'm running out of money fast and not making enough to support myself
>>
>>16460585

>good paying job at a bank

Were you making... Bank?

Home run.
>>
>>16460582
Perhaps you can convince him that killing sandniggers in the Middle East is probably not a good idea logistically efficiently and morally and that your time would be better spent making something people actually want instead of destroying something and creating a stable family at home?
>>
Well, I'm pretty much stagnating..... I can't join the army due to the Lautenberg amendment, which means since I have a "threatening domestic violence charge" from 6 years ago, I'm some sort of psychopathic violent guy that can't be trusted with firearms - can't even buy them.

Doesn't matter though, I ended up in the psyche ward 13 different times, ultimately landing on welfare. I don't have control of my own money, my mom's my payee. I've been living at an apartment for almost 2 years now, and after bills I have about 50 dollars left each month.

My laptop kinda sucks, it's an ASUS ROG G73JH, and it barely runs Fallout 4 on low settings.

Pretty much all my worries are "will I get cigarettes today?" and "when can I pay my internet bill so I don't have to go to my brother's and use his internet?"

Shit's boring.
>>
>>16460498
pretty shit, want to kill myself, don't know why, don't care, not going to kill myself because it's not the answer cool i like video games and im slightly weeb wby how's your life OP?
>>
>>16460588
Our country is not over there and he is going to be an airplane mechanic on base its like a normal 8 hour full time job daily but just on an air force base.
>>
Mediocre. I'm useless.
>>
>>16460598

Me too. Just not exceptional.
>>
>>16460587
I mean, I got a new car and had a nice place to live and stuff, and could pretty much buy what ever I wanted on a whim.
and yet, I was unhappy

now I don't have any of that stuff and I'm still unhappy, so I guess I kinda fucked myself.
rather be rich and unhappy than poor and unhappy
>>
Aright I guess. Despite making 100k a year I've come to realize I'm firmly entrenched in the middle class. I'll still have to work for someone else for the rest of my life.
>>
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THE GOOD
Partying a lot.
Girls.
I am 22yrs old and have my own home
Live in a big city
Drugs

THE BAD
Heartbroken
Partying a lot.
Drugs.
I can't focus in my goals, I feel stucked.
Can't stop thinking about my last relationship.

THE UGLY
I am in a rollercoaster of feelings.
I think that my head is hanging by a thread.
>>
How about you OP?
>>
>>16460632

Is that really so bad though?

I'm just a measly graduate student who makes 1/5th what you do and I understand I'll probably be middle class forever as well, but all I really want out of life is happiness, good food, and a few good friends.
>>
>>16460647
I feel ya man.
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>>16460558
>>16460582
If that's seriously how you feel save yourself and leave him if you've talked and he isn't interested in being flexible about it. Don't put yourself in a position where you feel like you're throwing your life away - That's seriously crazy. You aren't even sacrificing it for a thing that's reasonable.
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>>16460498
My life is pretty amazing.

I'm happy each day and feel like I'm accomplishing things that matter.
>>
Has its perks and flaws.

On the negative, I've been rejected a lot this year, romantically. Way too many "seen" messages for my liking. But i keep putting myself out there.

On the positive, I'm moving ahead, independently. Bought myself a new car, got my college degree, and start my career early next year.
>>
Busy as my year to shine was obviously 2015.
>>
Financially & regarding material-wealth, doing pretty good.
My car's paid off, got a steady job, have a home of my own, not struggling from month to month, got a killer compy, lots of video games, and all the time in the world.

And I feel so entirely empty.
>>
>>16460713
Maybe it's time to get into the dating scene?
>>
>>16460715
It's possible.
I might be hitting it off with a girl I talked with over coffee.
It could be depression. I was diagnosed a while back and did nothing about it because the medication scares the shit out of me. I could just be addicted to the lows.
>>
>>16460669
Amen, you have a good attitude. Yeah it's not so bad. I don't have to worry about if the electricity is going to be shut off or where to get my next meal.
>>
>>16460534
Ugh same here. I remember crying because I didn't want to get older, and I didn't want to die when I had the age of 6. Only when I started smoking weed I slept better and stopped worrying every single night.

Anyway, besides the usual deaththought, life is great. 21, progressing at my technical study. Volunteered for a year last year, and the company actually got big. Board member of a large study association now and generally doing a lot of different, exciting things
>>
25 grew up middle class taking care of my disabled veteran father most of my life while my mother worked we were doing okay till my mother got cancer 3 years ago and passed away shortly after, then I became an in home care taker for my father until he had a stroke and passed away now I'm struggling just to stay from going homeless, currently living off social security after a stay in a mental hospital after a breakdown, don't really have any family that speaks to me anymore I have friends and they care but I've become a stagnant depressed motivationless broken shell the meds help with unfavorable tendencies but I just don't know what to do with no official work history being 25 never had the time to love anyone or experience life and now I don't feel anything I just know if I don't get some forward momentum fast things are gonna get real dark for me here soon
>>
doing work for the dole. house fall apart. too poor. debt. he doesn't love me. so I moved on. but I'm such a mess. wish dad would come back. my friends are not my friends. "I hate the people who love me, and they hate me". I'm a NEET. and I need to stop wasting my time on 4chan & vidya.
>>
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I don't even know how I could describe my feelings right now, too many things are happening at once. I barely have time to spend on my hobbies or friends because of college and I'm still having bad grades somehow. I also have to work with people I really dislike. I feel stupid and useless, and I'm sure I'll have no future anyway.

Some hours ago there was a terrorist attack in Paris, and it scared the shit out of me because I live in one of the big three cities of France. I'm so scared something similar may happen where I live, not only for me but also for my friends and relatives. Plus, I'm a north african born and raised in France so I'm also scared about what kind of bullshit I'll have to put up with. Yeah, I know that "muslims" will be targeted first after the terrorist attack, but french people think that anyone who isn't white or asian is automatically muslim, regardless of anyone's actual religion.
>>
>>16460632
buy me steam games perhaps (^:
>>
I got infected with chicken pox and I'm 25 years old. The symptoms are severe and my body is so heavy it feels like I have 10x my weight. The rashes are so itchy, I'm barely sleeping at night.

The only good thing is that I can waste my time browsing the internet since I have 2 weeks break from work because of this.
>>
>>16460590
>ASUS ROG G73JH
>barely runs Fallout 4

I know that feeling bro
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>>16461082
Stay strong m8, you sound like a good person, I hope things brighten up for you
>>
Some good, some bad. Same as most people I suppose. Graduated, passed FE, decent paying job, decent prospects at buying a house soon. But, dad recently passed, brother is a mental and financial disaster, mother is depressed, grandparents in poor health.
Materially, I'm doing pretty well, but I see some emotional turmoil in the near future.
>>
>>16460498
That's none of your concern. Thank you.
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>>16460498
It's pretty shitty. Can't even get myself out of bed in an acceptable time. My lazyness and lack of dicipline is dictating my life. I'm 25 and feel like my mind&body have already given up.
>>
>>16460498
Can't complain, given everything that's happened.
Today's gonna be shitty, however. A friend of mine committed suicide a couple days ago, and i'm going to his funeral today. I didn't even know how bad off he was, as we hadn't talked in a while, but another friend is really torn up about it.
>>
>>16460607
no, I mean I'm literally useless. I can't keep up with the simplest of responsibilities. kms.
>>
Okay, I think. I finally feel like I've settled in at my job, and I've recently gotten a steady dealer who sells cheap weed and loves my cooking. If nothing else, the short term is looking comfy.
>>
It's good.
Picked up my guitar again, started going to the gym again, have a good winstreak with friends on Dota 2 and my career just began (21, top legal firm).

However, my GF has been abroad for a while and this has made me romantically and sexually frustrated as fuck.
>>
meh, worried about lots of shit but i'm pretty sure it's normal at this point when Everything is about to change, should be understandable... I don't think there's much I can do about it for now except to trust in God and follow his pathhoping it takes me to a better place.

my family thinks i'm depressed because I spend a good chunk of the day in bed wrestling with my thoughts. they complain i don't give them much attention but i'm with them LITERALLY all day. pretty fucking dramatic.

can't shake off the feeling that i'm missing something really important but idk lol.

Hard to understand how the Hand of God has it's way into our lives, but oh well, that is religion and all we can do is be a good person, and when the time comes, follow the light in the end of the tunnel and reach the gates of Heaven and afterlife.
>>
The last few months have ruined me.
-On the job injury, work said they would help, they haven't paid a dime
-Demoted at work
-Friend committed suicide
-BF decided to end it through a fucking text. I went to his house for 2 questions. I had a suspicion it seems to me like this confirmed it

So yea, absolutely crushed. Thanks for asking, go fuck yourself
>>
So-so. I should be happy I finally found a job but I made a thread about that particular issue here: >>16461725

Other than that, I want to better my DIY skills to hopefully be able to take one of my interests to make money, maybe start a business. That part's unlikely though. I just spaz out so bad when I work, get flooded by thoughts of depression and that I'm incapable and all that. I quit fairly quickly in other jobs in my youth but age hasn't really made things better. This might just be a part of me I need to work with.
>>
Bumparino
>>
>>16460498
Depressing, stale, lonely, directionless, yet oddly at peace with myself. I realize that life is temporary and futile. No matter how much money you make, no matter how many hot people you bang, no matter how hot you are, no matter how fancy your job is, it's all meaningless in the long run.

Be a decent person in life, honor your word, do good. That's what counts.
>>
I wonder if MILFS like pegging more
>>
Its alright, just in the middle of a pregnancy scare
>>
Not so good. I tore a muscle from lifting so I lost all my gains, can't start my electrical apprenticeship since I'm rehabbing this injury. I'm going bald. Still paying back thousands of dollars for my loans for college which I flunked out years ago, as well as 5 grand for vet bills which didn't go so well and I had to put my dogbro to sleep. Still no gf. Still have social anxiety.

But I've been practicing living in the moment through meditation and it makes the days go easier. One day at a time...
>>
>>16462441
wish I could "get" meditation. It sounds like it would be something I that could really help me. I'm a ball of anxiety, too worried about what ifs and people's reactions and when stressed I can't see past the negative "now" moments. The constant noise in my head and thoughts, all those ideas of things I want to make or do and no idea how to achieve that which sends me into a spiral of worry.

Any tips on making it work? Real-talk, not fucking mystical hindu guru bullshit.
>>
>>16460498
Could be worse.

Work about 50 hours a week with a shitty pay so i can pay the mortgage for my small appartment that i had to buy because there is a 8-12 year waiting list on rentable houses because refugees and non working people with a wellfare check are pushed to the front of the waiting list ,pay my bills and buy some alcohol and tobacco.

Don't go out that much because i cant afford it, meanwhile immigrants,refugees and low life trash living of our tax money without working a single day have as much to spend as me.

Am still happy, enjoy working for my money and going out occasionally with my friends ,chilling at my appartment.

Not that bad.
>>
>>16462494

Stare into a candle with complete concentration

This will also help build your 6th sense
>>
>>16462518
The whatnow? Please explain. The purpose, bit more detail than just that.
>>
Just weighing the pros and cons of divorce.

Any input will be appreciated.

I'm 29 and we've got a kid.
>>
>>16462521
For concentration, I looked at the wick of a candle until I got the feeling that I was actually inside it. I also practised hearing the sound of a needle dropping on the floor," he said.

http://www.news.com.au/travel/world-travel/japans-last-ninja-reveals-his-training-secrets/story-e6frfqai-1226453681202
>>
>>16462528
Well that's certainly interesting, but would that help with meditation? Anytime I tried concentrating really hard or staring at something, my mind always ends up wandering.

I also thought there's mantras to repeat or something else you can do to snap your concentration, to train it and to change your perspective. Could use it to remove anxiety.
>>
>>16462544
This is better than meditation
>>
>>16462550
I need more instruction than just "stare at a fucking candle, bruh"
>>
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>>16462494
try some guided meditations
http://marc.ucla.edu/body.cfm?id=22
there are tons on jewtube as well
jon kavat-zinn is cool
its a simple thing to do that is work.
just keep coming back to the breath
your mind will wander off but you go back to the breath
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3uLqt69VyI
>>
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>Finally got my hard earned degree 6 months ago
>Got hired
>Just got fuilltime employment
>Just got my first raise

>Have my own place
>Not much debt
>My stocks has gone up by 21% this year
>The market price on my apartment has almost doubled since i moved in.

I dunno what the fuck im expecting from life, but im terribly bitter for a person who has so much going for himself.

I guess it's all the social bullshit i can't really deal with.
>>
Shitty.

30 year old virgin. No friends. Hate my job. Family is disappointed in me. Every attempt I make at being social and making friends ends in rejection. My apt is so filled with stuff that you can barely see the floor anymore.
>>
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life is getting better
ive quit drugs , got a job , started meditating .
my relationship with my family has vastly improved .
pic unrelated
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>>16462806
25 and my room is clean, but same boat otherwise.

Every attempt at trying to escape goes wrong in the worst possible way.
>>
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It's moving

I'm starting to realize stuff about life
I'm starting to be happy with myself and appreciate the things that I have that others don't
I'm also starting to realize there are more important things in life than being depressed over a girl, like college

It's been tough so far, but I'm gradually improving each day
>>
Pretty good at the moment.

University is slow since I'm currently deaf in one ear but I'm really happy to be in an environment where I can literally decide "fuck it, I'm going to research autism" and have entire books on the subject.

I've got new glasses on the way and I might try and get contact lenses for when I go milf hunting during the Christmas holidays. After letting two slip away the last time I went out (no protection lel) I've got a better idea of what I want. Fuck knows how I'm going to dress since I've gotten into the habit of just wearing whatever the fuck I feel like. I'm thinking about buying some suit trousers/pants and trying to get something smarter to work but if I'm going to be fucking someone in the disabled toilets it feels like I'm over dressed.

I don't know where I was going with that.
>>
>>16460498
Pretty damn nice, it's almost scary to feel so good for so long. Although I worry a bit about exams after skipping uni for two months and don't know what to do with money after my dealer got caught.
>>
>Good
Broke many of my bad habits
Physical health is improving, partially related to the above
Have a firm handle on college and finances

>Bad
Don't really have any close friends irl anymore
Feel more isolated than I have in a long time
Parents keep trying to blame my brothers and I relationship (or lack thereof) for all of his failures

Kind of want to move away and try to set up something new but can't really afford it right now.
>>
First semester after transferring from community college I think I'm going to fail Ochem II. Kinda upset that I'm doing so poorly and I feel like I'm grasping the material fine enough. What really upsets me is that I'm going to have to take Biochem over the summer instead of just taking one class.
>>
>>16463000
>I am 19
>>
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I don't really know. Can you all tell me?

25/m single, make $56,000/yr but am not in a career job nor do I have any clue what to do for a career, I have few skills, I live in my moms basement just because (no real reason, I can afford to move out), don't really enjoy much. Only thing I'm passionate about is shooting and guns in general.

What you think?
>>
>>16463173
If you have to ask others, it's clearly not going too well. On the upside, your situation itself is objectively pretty decent. It's up to you to make more of it.
>>
>>16463181

I just don't know what to do, I'm not happy. I don't want a girlfriend because I don't ever want to get married or have kids, so that whole step is being skipped. But I just don't enjoy life. Honestly I've been really thinking on An Hero because I don't think I can ever get a dream job. I just feel like lost.
>>
>>16463189
>I don't think I can ever get a dream job
What stops you? Also maybe there are things that are similar that you could do?

Also why not learning other skills, anything that might seem useful, the process alone will be satisfying once you start getting results.
>>
lonely :(

-no gf
-shitty job
-depression

I can't believe the state of my life honestly. If I could tell my younger self anything it would be to never smoke weed every day for 5 years straight.
>>
>>16463215

Link below is my dream job. Not only would I be too old by the time I'd be able to even get accepted into the program. I'm not smart enough. Any job that requires college goes right out the window because I'm not smart enough. I'm absolutely terrible at anything that involves academics and that's a understatement.

http://youtu.be/DsUKeqjFQM8
>>
>>16463244
>Not only would I be too old by the time I'd be able to even get accepted into the program
Well, that sucks.

>I'm not smart enough.
That's a bullshit excuse though, unless you are retarded, which you clearly aren't going by your posts. College is about determination, discipline, focus and especially the right learning techniques. I know tons of smart people who failed because they lacked one of these. (Distractions in life like kids, lack of motivation, finding a job they already like, not being able to adjust, etc) There are also tons of perfectly average people, who managed to get a bachelor degree.

Not to say that gaining the aforementioned learning techniques or the rest is easy but given that you can hold a decently paid job, you already display parts of all the shit needed. As corny as it sounds, it's about how much you really want it. Give it a try, or another if you already tried, with different approach or admit, that you don't care about it enough.

Also what about alternatives to Airforce? Sure being a pilot for a private charter company and flying a fucking Cessna 172 won't be nearly as fly as a jet but you'll be in the air, which is clearly a step up.
>>
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Pretty horrendous, at least I learned a lot of useless life lessons.
>>
>>16463332
>it's about how much you really want it

The thing is, I used to believe that.

A few years ago, when I was still in the Army, a dream opprotunity popped up. My command was going to give me full backing to go to Warrant Officer School and become a Army helicopter pilot. I literally was like jizzing my pants at the thought of flying a Apache, Blackhawk, Kiowa or even a fatass Chinook. There was only ONE issue though. My GT score (a academic score the military uses) was a 94, and I needed a GT of 110 to go. So know what they did? They sent me up in a 8 week math class program on base that was tailored to that specific test. It got me out of all military duties for 8 weeks. So I put everything I had into it. I actually would even vocally tell myself "I'm going to score a 110" over and over. I wanted it so fucking bad. I gave 100% in class but still had trouble focusing. I went to study groups on my free weekends. I did everything the instructor said. I remember I was feeling so confident the day of the test. I took it. Felt great. Went back to my company area. People asked me how I did, I told them I felt good about it. I went back to the barracks and spent the next 3 days watching videos of AH-64D/E Apaches fucking shit up while I waited for my score.... 3 days later when I finally saw what I had. Not only did I fucking FAIL the fuck out of it. I actually LOWERED my score from a 94 to a god damn 91.

That was the day I stopped believing that saying. I've never wanted or tried as hard for anything ever before, and look what that got me. I almost killed myself that night.
>>
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Ehhhh, fine, overall, I guess.

The good:
> Doing well in college, going to graduate on time with 2 majors and (about) 3.9 GPA

The bad:
> Under a lot of stress
> Didn't get the scholarship I worked really hard for
> Worried I'm becoming depressed again, but probably not, it's probably just temporary stress
> Also I posted >>16463290

I'd like someone to talk to, if anyone wants to respond.
>>
>>16463376

I'm the guy who posted above who is a depressed anon as well. I may not be best at giving you advice since I don't have any experience in the relationship thing. But what I think you should do is stop worrying about finding a mate, at least for now. Go finish your degree stuff and go find yourself a good career first. Once you get yourself settled. Even if it's a few more years don't the road go start looking for a mate again. The biggest thing I see people do that fuck them up is getting all lovey dovey too early. I may not have any personal experience, but i observe others. And that's what I see happen. A guy might get a great job opportunity in another state, but his gf doesn't want to go. So they fight and it fucks then emotionally. That or they rush and get married early and really fuck up because they weren't ready.

I just think take your time. Go travel and just take some alone time. Get stabilized in a new career. Then go find a mate
>>
>>16463376

To add, I think movies, TV, and social media pressure people into relationships. They create this scene that to be "normal" you should have a mate. So everyone's always in such a rush to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Hell, half the time I think people just want one so they can say they have one. It's bullshit. There's absolutely nothing wrong with staying single for a while or even forever. Being single keeps the ball in your court and gives you more options.
>>
>>16463407
Hey, anon. I think that's good advice. Calling someone a "mate" sounds so primal (I don't even want to "mate"; I don't like children), but I get what you're trying to say. I suppose I'm thinking too much about long-term happiness, and I always imagine sharing a strong connection with someone, like in a strong relationship, would bring that. But you're right, I should take my time and get my shit sorted ("find myself" or whatever bullshit phrasing works in this situation), and then happiness will (hopefully) follow.
Thank you, anon.
>>
>>16463435
>I suppose I'm thinking too much about long-term happiness, and I always imagine sharing a strong connection with someone, like in a strong relationship, would bring that.

I think most people in our society today do that. I literally blame all the shit TV puts in our heads. In Europe most people don't get married until after age 30. But here in the US it's almost like expected. I get shit on because I don't have a girlfriend and I'm 25. It's stupid.
>>
>>16460891

I actually had that thought the other day about getting weed prescribed to perhaps help my anxiety.

One of the reasons I don't want to go to a doctor about it is because from what I hear anti-anxiety medications just fuck your shit up, and the last thing I want to have happen is for the drugs to make me suicidal or some shit like that.

I read that you can't even really treat OCD with drugs anyways and my affliction is pretty minor so I guess I can just deal with it. Weed or not, I'd rather not take anything for it though.
>>
Painful but a good kind of painful.
>>
>>16463370
>A few years ago
aka. you was a young, overconfident fag. Been there, done that, though my result was just much worse than expected and not failing, so the ego hit wasn't as bad as it could've been. The way it turned out for you definitely sucks more and it's understandable why you wouldn't want to try again.

On the other hand, is one try really enough to disprove the saying? Sure, you had one great chance and blew it spectacularly, which gives you a chance to analyse what went wrong (outside of the "not being academical enough") and give it another try. It might turn out just as bad, hell even worse or you will succeed.

What do you have to lose if you're not happy with your life as it is now? Even a small chance of success seems better than going in the direction that doesn't make you happy. At worst you will experience another failure, maybe definitely decide to stop trying, or it will be frustratingly close to success and you're attempt it again and make it then, or find another passion on the way. Shit, you might even die in a freak accident before you even get there.

If you ever consider pulling a hero, how much worse would it be trying to reach for your dream again? Oh well, it's your life, do whatever seems best.
>>
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It was bad for a really long time. But I have newfound hope in things that are not for sure. They're making my life better though so I'm just going to enjoy them for now. I'll be bummed if things dont work out but I know I'll be able to try again.
This is terrifying
I haven't been this nervous in years
>>
>>16463504

That dream is not achievable anymore. And I know that. I've tried several times to bounce back over the past 2 years. I actually tried college this fall. But had to drop out because I was failing. I'm just fucking stupid. I don't and won't have anybody to live for which is ok with me. But I want a job to live for. But it doesn't seem achievable
>>
i broke up with my bf last month and it's been better than it's been in months
>>
I'll live. I'm more content and at-east with myself than at other times. I've been out of university for 2 years and have just taken care of all my shit to get back in it this next semester.

I'm sorry that I don't really have any advice or comfort for anyone tonight. I try to distribute as much comfort as I can, but I'm feeling drained, boys. Feeling as though I'm a detriment to people's mental state rather than a benefit; regardless of my intentions.

I dearly hope you all have a better tomorrow than you had today. Really, I do. I care about all of you motherfuckers deeply. I'm just too tired right now to properly display it.

This tune's been in my head lately. Making me write again, which is fantastic. Shame that I never got to meet you, Jim.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dpuIMLugCw
>>
>>16463455
I agree 100%.
Even the guy who I was casually seeing and broke up with yesterday, he said that he recognized that we were too different and that we were headed separate ways after graduation next year, but he thought it'd be worth it to see it through until we graduated.
A little later he said he was upset because he said "I know I'm probably not going to have another girlfriend for a long time."
I know he didn't mean it like that, but it felt like he was saying he was upset just because he won't have a girlfriend (just any girl in general) for a while, like it didn't particularly matter that it wasn't me.
If he knew it wasn't going well, why bother keeping up with it? Why is it so necessary to be in a damned relationship, even an unhappy one?
>>
>>16463534

Because in our society having a significant other is a status symbol now. There is a guy I work with who is 42 years old. Never married and he's also a virgin. And people make fun of him and actually like pitty him sometimes. He's a hard worker and a good guy, but he gets treated different because he's single.
>>
>>16463552
It's so stupid. Why can't people just let each other live how they want to without giving them shit for it?
There's another thread on /adv/ about how this guy's not sure if he's ok with his girlfriend having slept with 12 people, and all these people are commenting that girls who've slept with that people are "soiled" or something. What? Why judge everyone whose done that? I don't do that, but I don't judge them. "You do you."
That guy is a virgin? If he's happy with it, people should just leave him alone.
>>
>>16463552
>Because in our society having a significant other is a status symbol now.

You're right; although having a significant other has been a status symbol for a long time. It ain't nothing new. It is looked upon, perhaps rightfully, as a sort of success. The same way there's career or academic success. Ostensibly, it is meant to display that you're at least an affable and endearing enough person to be desirable to another person. As the desirability of that person grows, so does the success of their partner.

That still ain't all of the picture, though.

>>16463534
At least some people that I've met and been close to simply won't subject themselves to the single life. If you were to ask them, they'd say that they simply can not live life happily without a romantic partner. I'd say, a bit selfishly maybe, that they choose not to life live happily sans a romantic partner, that they choose to remain a person that fails to be content without assistance.

Anyway, it isn't just one of these two reasons, either. There's certainly more to it than my cursory examination and thoughts on it can uncover.

I consider myself fortunate to maintain a very acceptable degree of contentment and happiness without a romantic engagement. I'd be lying if I said that the most intense positive emotions I've experienced have been outside of a romantic engagement. But I don't crave those feelings so badly as some others, you know?
>>
>>16463552
It's so stupid. Why can't people just let each other live how they want to without giving them shit for it?
There's another thread on /adv/ about how this guy's not sure if he's ok with his girlfriend having slept with 12 people, and all these people are commenting that girls who've slept with that people are "soiled" or something. What? Why judge everyone whose done that? I don't do that, but I don't judge them. "You do you."
That guy is a virgin? If he's happy with it, people should just leave him alone.
>>
>>16463650
>>16463584

Um.
>>
I just spent a wonderful four days with my boyfriend for my birthday.
>>
>>16463732

How was the sex
>>
>columbia university
>electrical engineering
>top of class

>mfw starting to doubt post secondary education, debt, and false promises I was made

all I want to do is be a simple fisherman living in the tropics...
>>
Im bored
I want a girlfriend
Im watching my art friends blossom into careers and opportunities while I still upload my shit art on instagram
None of my friends like going out at night
Im on academic probation
Ive felt like ive been lost in life for years

Im almost happy though
>>
Girl who is currently dating someone in an LDR said she's kind of in love with me and I am too and told her. Because we both view it as morally wrong and she still feels for her boyfriend, we decided to try a "no contact" rule for the both of us, but it isn't working and we still talk. Is it wrong that I may be breaking up a good relationship?
>>
shit
but im quite alright with it
>>
>>16460706
I wouldn't write that off as negative desu. It shows you are making an effort despite getting rejected, that's kinda admirable knowing a lot of people don't even try.
>>
i want a nice job and a nice place and a hot man and a hot woman

sigh
>>
>>16460713
For how long have you been playing video games? If it's from a young age then you're probably losing interest and feel like you are wasting your time. I've been playing video games since I was like 4 and now that I'm a med student, everytime I play I feel like shit because I feel like I could do something more useful instead of literally wasting my time.
>>
>>16463071
Buy nice Christmas presents for your loved ones :)
>>
Things have been going downhill since August, and I honestly thought things had just taken a turn for the better but now I'm not so sure, and I'm anxious about trying to find something new that would help me stay afloat.
>>
>>16463427
This. I think a lot of people get depressed because of TV and books and whatnot too because they expect their life to be extraordinary.
>>
>>16464079
If it was a good relationship then she wouldn't be falling for you. LDR don't work anyway
>>
>>16460498
Uncertain, trying to decide if I should take a unit over the summer. The exams for said unit would be in February as would a bunch of other exams for some other subjects I had deferred.
>what should I do?
>>
>>16460498
Just lost my best friend i fucked up yada yada yada very long story so I guess I'm OK it could be worse at least he's happy without me
>>
Pretty fucking good
Went to wales for the weekend
Got off with a welsh bird

Next day shes texting my friends gf "I still think anons cool ;)"

Im good with women apparently. No idea when this happened but yeah apparently Im a good looking guy with a decent level of banter

Lifes pretty alright
>>
>>16464249
Fuck yeah, dog. It's all about the banter.
>>
>>16460498
Pretty shitty in the love department. Got dumped on January due to ldr. Then got rejected without even trying to get close with my crush at my new work place (happened on Oct.). Fuck, cant get a break with my love life.
>>
Pulling a 2.3 in CC because of procrastination.

Body is going to shit.

No friends to speak of, will probably kill myself soon.
>>
I'm really sad, anxious and angry all the time for no good reason and I constantly obsess over all my bad life decisions. Negative emotions invade all my thoughts and I feel as if there's an invisible predator one step behind me, breathing down my neck. I feel like my head is being crushed and my lungs are suffocating, but they're not. I want to die but I fear death too much.

But yeah, from an objective point of view I have a pretty good life. I dropped out of college to become a NEET, and I receive a generous allowance from my parents, in addition to welfare. Apart from screaming, crying and punching walls, all I do is stare at the ceiling and play video games.
>>
Shit. I'm stuck in a dead end job, and I procrastinate so much that I never make progress learning the skills I need to go elsewhere.
I'm also a massive reclusive weeb so as a result the chances of me finding a girlfriend are slim to none, pushed more towards the none side if the scale owing to how I live in a part of the country where getting pissed and watching Rugby is a national past time.
>>
Shit. Thanks for asking.
>>
>>16463092
Go to grad school. You take the GRE and apply to a few places. BAM. You are in a new place by next year surrounded by intellects and party animals.
And you pay nothing.
>>
Okay but not great.
Broke up with someone who was just short of being my girlfriend for three years, women seem to have absolutely no interest in me so maybe filling the void with some sex isn't the way to go about things.
My second year of uni is proving to be expensive, but getting rejected from jobs is becoming as common as shitting. I need to up my game in terms of uni work as well.
>>
I haven't really done anything but lay around in bed for the past 3 months. I kinda miss being social and able to work.
>>
>>16460498
At least I'm not dead, I guess.
>Gotta look at the bright side
>>
the woman i love loves another man.
at least i'm her friend and she's mine...
>>
>>16462494
Check out the book "The Power of Now", it's a guide to become your strongest and most authentic self through living in the now moment. Do this as well as simple daily meditation and you'll benefit a ton.
>>
>>16464182
That's what I said but she's still trying. It hurts me too because I don't want to ruin the dude's life but I seriously love this girl.
>>
>>16463945
Absolutely amazing
>>
Good I guess.

I started a part-time job as a repair technician last month. I really enjoy the job, lots of possibilities for advancement and I have things in common with most of the people I work with.

I'm debating whether or not to go back to school for IT though. I honestly don't want to get into anymore debt but I know that nowadays you can get anywhere without a degree. I'm not satisfied with making only $10/hr.
>>
>>16465470
Also I'm no longer depressed so that's good.
>>
>>16460498
I don't really no man, my life doesn't seem to have a future at the moment.

>the bad:
I'm depressed and my gf left me for her ex and I fucking miss her all the time and it's killing me. Also, I haven't gone to uni for the past few weeks now and I don't think I'm going to make it this semester. I'm not even sure if I want to study biology anymore, I have no clue what I want to study, so I don't have a bright future atm

>the good:
Met a half british half chinese qt3.14 and we're doing music together. Meeting her to make music is the only thing I am looking forward to every week
>>
>>16460498
Alright. Not too happy with my current job which is my first and been at for six months but the people are nice and I'm still trying. Contract ends in March and at my current pace I don't think they'll keep me on.

Family life is fine though, no issue with either my parents or sibling. Got to arrange to meet a girl over the weekend but need to prepare a little bit as it'll be our second time meeting.

Otherwise, my only major problem is work performance, which none of my colleagues hold against me as I'm a nooby, and getting another hobby besides computer games.
>>
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>>16460534

Are you me? Seriously, I've been feeling the exact same way for about a week and a half now. I'm not sure why things hit me all of a sudden. I'm 23, graduated college last fall and have been in NEET mode since mainly since I wanted time in between school and trying to get a job for relaxation.

But I think that's let me have too much time on my hands to think about things, and now I'm having crushing anxiety and fear about the possibilities of what happens after death, the inevitability of it, and the point of accomplishing anything in life. It's really terrifying and I'm so far unable to shake this shit enough to return to some kind of normalcy.

If you even get to read this reply, I hope you feel better about it soon and live a long, happy life and I hope that a God and/or some kind of good afterlife does exist so that our lives are not truly in vain as I keep fearing it may be. I know that's the kind of comfort maybe I've been needing, so the least I can do is extend it to another who feels as the same as I've been.
Though I've been unable to give myself such comfort, perhaps I can at least let you know you're not alone.
>>
>>16464155

Exactly
>>
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>Test negative for HIV at 1 month and 3rd month.
>Get canker sore from eating and scrap my inner lip.
>Start worrying that I may have HIV again despite knowing my test results and it's making me depressed because I have to constantly remember the nasty craiglist thing I did.
>>
>>16465550
How many dicks did you suck senpai
>>
>>16465398

That's good. At least a anon on here had a good time
>>
>>16465555
One and it was my first time.
I didn't suck his dick though, I told him to fuck my ass, couldn't feel shit because he was pencil thick.

He sucked my dick and tongued my ass though, that was the only good thing.

I guess I'm just mad at myself for doing it.
>>
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>>16465555

Those quads
>>
>>16465565
>couldn't feel shit because he was pencil thick

That sucks

Did you like the taste of his cum
>>
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>>16465565


Gross
>>
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>>16465571
He pulled out and came on my ass.
Immediately washed and got the fuck outta there.
I'm just glad I don't have HIV or any STDs.
Still don't know why I'm so upset.

>>16465574
I know man. Hope other people don't do what I did. I should have just followed my instincts
>>
>>16465568
Witnessed, brother!

>>16465574
pls no bully
>>
>>16465580
Have you been with anyone else since?

You're probably upset because you want love
>>
>>16465584
No. And I'm afraid of telling people I love that I actually fucked a dude.
And I guess that's what I am looking for, since I'm talking to this chick and she's really cool, she makes me forget the whole thing.

But she has a boyfriend and I'm not about making her dump him or being a side hoe.
>>
>>16465590
Then don't tell them
>>
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>>16465595
Thank you dude. Don't know how what you said make me feel better, but it did.
>>
>>16465604
I'm glad it helped

Stay strong
>>
>>16460498
Really good, actually. I've got food, water, a place to live and I'll be going back to school soon. Everything's fine for now.
>>
>desperate with literally thousands of homework from college
>ex-gf is still into me
>not banging anyone
>not going to bang ex-gf either, that stupid kid
>somehow people is now enjoying my company
>>
My hours were cut down at work a lot, I went from full-time to about 20 hours 3 days a week. When my boss first brought up doing this I told them I'd get a second job but no other places I've applied to have responded to me.

So now I'm getting frustrated because I know that I'm not going to be able to get a decent (non-retail) position because I have no trade skills or a college degree. I'm getting towards my mid-twenties, still living with my parents in my hometown and overall feel like a manchild loser. I don't think I have any other choices than going to school to find something to get a job in, but it'd be at the risk of losing all the money I've saved over the past four years. I know the military is an option but I never wanted to join it.
>>
>>16466016

If you don't truly want to join the military then don't. It will be 10x shittier if you don't want to be there in the first place.
>>
My career's going pretty well (software dev at one of the big four) but the rest of my life's a trainwreck. Haven't had friends since high school, am too shy to get out of my apartment and do much outside of work, constantly worry about what my family back home thinks of me, and am deep in the closet / kissless virgin. I don't really have much motivation to play vidya and am now at a point where I don't have to work crazy hours on weekends, so now I'm literally sitting in my apartment waiting for Monday. Can't really call it out by name, but something's really wrong with my state of life.
>>
I've been doing pretty well in the past few months but I can slowly feel myself falling back into the void of depression, anxiety, various other mental issues, etc.

I've been trying to get help but dealing with the medical system around here is a huge pain in the ass that I just don't have the energy for.
>>
I'm anxious about the future because my potential could be for nothing.

I started studying in america this year and I have done nothing but perform exceptionally in my classes, except for one english class where my teacher is a legitimate SJW and I am in far over my head while she provide any help at all.

I'm only at a community college and an associates degree is worthless in my home country so I have to get at least a bachelors to feel like I accomplished something, what worse is I am only able to fund myself currently on getting an associates degree and a bachelors requires me to get a scholarship, I'm pissing away money and I really have no idea how things are going to pan out.

Short of becoming a boy-toy for a rich and lonely cougar I am stuck for ideas if I don't get a scholarship.
>>
>>16460498
besides my general obsession with the lack of females in my life for the past, lets say 5 years, im not so bad.

just hit me today, like fuck, i spend so much time thinking about women. all my coworkers are 10 years my senior and the only girls i talk to at all routinely are my best friends gf and some girl from omegle i kept in contact with for 2 years and talk shit with from time to time (not so much anymore)

tips/advice?
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