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Sexless Sally Says

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I have been with my boyfriend for a few years now. When we first got together sex was regular and awesome. But over time sex has become quite rare.

For several months now I have had to nag and (I am ashamed to admit) force my boyfriend to have sex with me.

I tried talking it out of him. To find out if there is an issue, or why he just no longer wishes to have sexy fun times.
He told me he is 'kind of asexual'. He said he is happy with the relationship the way it is, but sex doesn't interest him.

I get that and I want to respect that. But I am finding it hard. I have always had a high sex drive, I love sex so this has all been very frustrating for me.

He is by far the greatest boyfriend I have had, but the lack of intimacy is really just starting to turn me away.

I don't want to leave him, but I don't want to have to nag/force him to fuck me. What should I do?
>(I am ashamed to admit) I forced my boyfriend to have sex with me

Oh geez, don't do that. That's rape and it's an awful thing to do.

Have you thought about proposing an open relationship? You could stay in your relationship but just have sex with other men.

Or you could masturbate. Have you tried that?
Put up with it, or leave him. You two are fundamentally incompatible. You can try to make it work, but there will come a point where you can't handle it anymore or you start to resent him
I'm pretty sure you have to either figure out why he doesn't want to have sex and somehow augment that (may be totally impossible without his help), negotiate an open relationship where you get to get fucked by other guys, get awesome sex toys or break up.

Wish I had better news but you can't just fucking sexually die.
For every one woman in this situation there are 100 men. He's got low testosterone and if he won't have it diagnosed and treated then there's not much you go do other than leave.
In my 4+ decades on the planet I have never heard of a relationship surviving this. Leave now before you are too old to attract a good man.
I have suggested an open relationship but he refuses. He says it would upset him.
I honestly don't want to cause pain for him.

And yes, I masturbate. It really isn't a substitute for human intimacy.

Idk. Is there such a medication to numb sexual interest or something along those lines..
i experienced this same issue with my most recent ex. she simply could not keep up with my sex drive, and refused to compensate with oral/manual/whatever. she gave me the same "asexual" nonsense that you got (which i dont believe in, and even if it were real, an asexual person wouldnt be fucking you 24/7 at the beginning of the relationship and then cut you off and if they did it would be horribly manipulative and red-flaggy). i decided to break it off with her, which turned out to be the right call because when i went to have the conversation (and ever since then) her crazy came out in full force. you have to have sexual compatibility in a relationship, or it cant last.

tl;dr: leave him and find someone with a libido comparable to your own
Not a medication, but you could get chemically castrated or a female circumcision. I personally wouldn't recommend it, though.
Thanks for the advice guys. I know deep down it probably wont work, and resentment is likely to come sooner rather than later.

But truth is truth and none of my friends* have the decency to tell me honestly what they think.

Truly, it makes me sad to think of ending it but he is such a great guy, he deserves to be with someone who will appreciate and respect him for the way he is. I am just not capable of accepting it.
Put up with it or leave. You need to let him know you have a high sex drive, an that it's difficult to not have sex.

Just don't cheat on him, that's not fair.
I'm in the same boat, but I'm male.

My gf and I have been dating for four years, and in the last year our sex life has taken a dive.

A few months ago she realized we weren't really having sex anymore, and she said it was because the pill was killing her sex drive and messing with her hormones too much. Skip ahead four months to now, and still no sex drive. Maybe a 10% increase.

I even bought her Fusion Libido supplements. They make maybe another 10% increase. She wants to have sex maybe once a week at most, and since she's not on the pill it's non-penetrative sex. It's still honestly really fulfilling, but not often enough to satisfy my needs.

I don't know what to do. We both give each other massages daily, and sometimes if I work my hands right she gets turned on and it turns into sex. But most of the time if I try to touch her pussy she'll push me off and say no. Sometimes she'll giggle and ask me to have sex. It's frustrating. I either get laid or get an upset girlfriend who says I'm being too touchy.

I don't know what the fuck to do. She says she feels bad because our sex drives are still different, but if she really cared about our relationship then she would make having a satisfying sex life for the both of us a priority.

I dropped her off at home and she's asleep now, I had horrible blue balls from trying to hook up with her all day so I jacked off. I don't like masturbating unless I have to. The pain was unbearable.

She is sleeping, but I just texted her "we need to connect more, I feel like we're losing our spark."

I don't know what she will say back in the morning, we both have work so I guess I'll talk to her about it later tomorrow. The only advice I can give to you is be honest and communicate your needs to your partner.

good luck
How attractive are you body wise? Try improving that

Just because someone is my girlfriend or wife doesn't mean I'm automatically going to find them as sexy as a porn star
Jeez, he won't consent to an open relationship, even with just girls? Have you tried enticing him with a FFM threesome perhaps?

How often does he masturbate? What about his diet and level of physical activity? Yank his power cords to his vidya, unplug his router, and strut around in sexy, enticing clothes and makeup while you do your daily household activities.

If that doesn't work, you need to sit him down and explain that you have needs. If this still doesn't light a fire under his ass, either have an affair or break up with him. I'd love to have another female in my life that lives for sex, as would almost any man, and if he won't take your feelings and urges seriously, why should you?
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