Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 6766. page

>>16493142

The fuck does it matter? I'm more worried that she felt the need to state her "agenderness", as if it's some type of special snowflake badge.

It might mean she has a vagina, but testicles instead of ovaries. It happned to a female olympian who trained all her life, but was rejected after testing cause she "wasnt full female". Wont give you her name cause i learned it from sociology and forgot it. Google it yourself if you want to know more.

She might also be retarded.

>>16493155
Agender refers to a mental state of not fully identifying with either gender, not a body disorder.

I'm not talking about not going to her in general. But at like one time per week or something I just want to stay at home without needing a specific reason

How long have you been dating? Have you told her before that it's hard for you to take the train that much?

I haven't told her. I just used reasons (like doing sports) to stay at home. But I don't want to lie when the reason cancels.
One and a half year.

>>16493080
"I know this is a hard time for you right now, but I'm right here with you and I'm not going anywhere."

If you knew the grandma at all, add: "She was a wonderful lady."

>>16493080
>The usual shit you say to people doesn't seem appropriate when it's someone I deeply care about.

this is exactly how i feel, but let me tell you something

it's bullshit

you know what she wants to hear? the same generic bullshit you know you're supposed to say. you can lead with "i know this sounds cliche, but..." and then unload like a hallmark gift card.

trust me op.

>>16493085
>>16493086
I'll be sure to give it a shot, but I have no idea how to follow it up if it doesn't work out.

Your new priority in life just became learning how to drive, and then buying a car.

Who gives a fuck if you don't NEED to drive, KNOWING how to is what counts. Besides, most normal chicks (/adv/ girls do not count whatsoever) find it a turn off if you have no car or licence.

No, the car thing isn't a problem at all since you live in a city and the mother thing could be a dealbreaker to some girls but the rest more than makes up for it. Personally I don't think there's anything wrong with living with your parents as long as you're saving up money but this doesn't really apply to your case since she's living with you so whatever.

>>16493037
>Your new priority in life just became learning how to drive
I agree with this somewhat
>and then buying a car.
but am on the fence about this, see below.

A lot of people in big cities don't own a car and nobody cares. That being said, as a business owner it might be a good idea to have a vehicle in case you need to take trips out of town or out of state, and I'm sure you can find a way to write off travel expenses to help defray some of the cost. And thinking about it, it might seem a little "off" to girls if you're an entrepreneur and don't at least have a business vehicle. But you have to look at your budget, potential tax writeoffs, parking costs, insurance, etc. and decide if it's worth it.

As for your mom, yeah it helps that she's living with you and not you living with her; but a girl might also look at that and ask herself how many years she's going to spend helping take care of her mother-in-law if you and she become serious about each other. A lot of single people live with roommates too, so if you live with someone and she lives with someone, it cuts down on the number of places you can comfortably meet for sexytimes.

>>16492826
hang out with people who don't drink?

tell people you're an alcoholic

>>16492838
worst. advice. ever

>>16492809
hsve you tried telling your parents you're more talented at art and will have more success doing it? (That might be a half-lie because talent is overrated, interest and effort matters more, but most people want to hear that). So that you can transfer to studying it

>>16492824
They won't listen, and to be fair I am not as good to be enrolling into some art or music school ( I think its waste of money to be exact) and I do agree that talent without dedication is nothing

>>16492853
Start creating art masterpieces with your pastries. The world is your canvas.

If you agreed not to tell him, and then told him anyway how is that honest?
Either way, move on. Don't get involved with friends' exes.

>>16492765
Because I didn't throw her under the bus. I told him he needs to get back with her or else he wouldn't have felt as bad as he did. I couldn't just be a third wheel and watch them get chummy.

>>16492743
you did the right thing OP. He is your friend, she isn't and was just using you as a place holder out of convenience. Even if your friend wasn't the guy she was still hung up on you shouldn't waste your time with her.

>>16492731
You're acknowledging that smoking weed every day is a bad thing, so maybe that should hint you towards slowing it down a little. Smoke a couple of times a week.

I smoke like once or twice a month, because I don't have time between social occasions, driving places, work, gym, etc.

>>16492738

Well, I'm not super proud of it, but it hasn't really affected my life. I used to spend most of my nights playing video games and shit, now that I live together with a few of my stoner friends, we just light up a joint whenever there's nothing else to do for the night.

Whenever I'm with non-smoking people, I can have a good time without smoking though. It's just a different experience. I've never been much of a party person, but I do still have a social life.

The question was about how open I should be about this on a first date, though.

Bump. The board is going fast today.

tl;dr - When and how to tell a girl you smoke weed almost daily.

>>16492722
Why not use pen and paper?

Yes you can

Yep, people often do that at the library at my uni. Use some general purpose cleaner if it doesn't fully come off

>>16492644
This depends a whole lot on your relationship. Would you be okay with her kissing other guys? Would she be okay with you kissing other girls? The gender of the person they are 'experimenting' with doesn't matter that much. If you are exclusive, it means exclusive.

>>16492659
I would definitely not be OK with her kissing other guys that would be terrible. I plan to bring up if she'd be okay with me kissinf other girls when we really sit down to talk about it. I'm probably going to tell her No unless I am involved and active in some way.
I love her a lot so I hope she's not too disappointed

>>16492747
Actually it's just going to be a straight No

>>16492641
>I have body dysmorphic disorder

step one, stop being a special snowflake, step two if it bothers you, lose weight, step three, he probably misses his ex

>>16492641
>and he told me to fuck off

You either take this advice or you don't. But I hope you do.

Leave him. Someone who responds to you like that at your most vulnerable is not the man you want standing with you when you get older, fatter, pregnant etc...

I know you won't leave him, but I couldn't leave him for years, until one day I did and I can't believe I wasted years on someone like him.

>>16492646
TL;DR how to deal with insecurity in relationship?

I do appreciate the advice I didnt ask for though. However I'm not looking for that in this thread. That label was put on me my a therapist around 4 years ago now and honestly reading up about it I dont doubt it at all because its the closest thing that explains my inner-dumbness when it comes to my appearance. Not everyone is trying to hide behind labels, I wish I wasn't this way as it would make connecting to people so much easier. Working on losing weight, and as for missing his ex, thats why I made this thread asking for help dealing with insecurity.

>>16492654
I'm glad you got out of that situation, however my life is too intertwined with his, vacations booked etc and I love him too much to walk away

Gee that rather depends on what you consider to be a dealbreaker, doesn't it? What, in the bio is it you don't like?

Personally, I don't like the couch potato thing, but I wouldn't say it's a deal breaker

>>16492661
I mean the couch potato really depends. I know 9/10 sporty girls who spend like one hour a day on the couch and still go "teehee I love pizza, I'm so lazy and a couch potato!" But I also know landwhales who actually mean it. And as well girls of all sizes in between. They're weird that way. Rest of bio seems good though

Putin

Be a happy merchant

jihadi john

>>16492375
this is bait

>>16492375
I know this is bait but asians "moaning" us fucking unsettling. Are you pterodactyles by any chance?

>>16492385
OP pic is so bait

>>16492366
Try to secure a job in Washington before moving there. This will be tough as most employers prefer hiring a local candidate that he can have a face-to-face interview with. I know someone who found a job overseas as a vet (she only had a phone interview before being hired), but then she has a lot of working experience and she was looking for jobs in a rural area.
If you move before finding a job, things will be risky. You can end up jobless or employed in some job which pays very little (ie minimum wage). Do you have friends or relatives to live with in Washington? If not, you will need to rent a place to live and this costs money. You will have to pay for your rent and other expenses even if you can't find a job.
$10,000 is most likely too little. As I've said, there is no guarantee that you can find a job after moving to Washington.

>>16492366
Oh, another thing. Can you depend on your parents financially if you really do end up broke? Are your parents well-off or not? There's the chance that you can end up broke, you know. $15/hour at McDonalds will not be enough for rent unless if you live with other roomates.

>>16492377
Yeah, I'm for sure going to try to get a job first. I don't have anyone to live with, and probably was going to try to rent a 2 bedroom place with a roommate, since it's looking like that's the cheapest reasonable option.

Is 10,000 really too little? It seems like everyone I know who has moved out managed on significantly less than that. (granted, most of them were moving locally)

>>16492383
In an emergency, yeah I probably could.