Broke up with a girlfriend four weeks ago. It was a long distance relationship but we kept in touch however we could. We visited each other. Then it got fucked up somehow, she said it's over and it is not really working, but I know she loved me before. She never felt the same for anyone before me. I was her first.
She now hates me I think. I still love her and care for her. I can't even text her about how she's feeling. I just wait and kill time hoping she will text me. It's crippling.
It's like she'd died, only then I wouldn't have the hope of her texting me again.
How can anything that beautiful die in such a horrible death leaving a bitter stench on your tongue. How to forget. How to stop hoping that she might contact me again?
>>16537722
I was happy for the first time in my life with her.
Im sort of the same situation (>>16537519). Expect that she's not my gf and it's not anything romantic. I hope she texts me back. But I just keep myself busy watching Whiplash to forget about her when she pops in my mind. When I watch that film, I don't think about her
>>16537744
Yeah well...that's different. Why Whiplash though? I can't even watch films because I get so easily distracted by my thoughts about her.
Has anyone on /adv/ ever faked an orgasm before?
If so, how many times?
Why?
Did your partner know you were faking?
Have you ever come clean about it?
I know a lot of people have faked their orgasms, and as one of these people, I'm just curious if anyone on /adv/ has ever faked it before?
for 2 years i thought i was enough for my gf.
just found out she fakes it more then half the time.
>feelsrealbadman.jpg
Hurts alot to find that out and now puts way too much pressure on sex for me.
I can hardly get it up because of performance anxiety.
Not sure it'll ever be the same..
>>16537668
Just because she faked it doesn't mean it's your fault or that you're doing something wrong.
A lot of women just find it really hard to orgasm during sex, it's no ones fault so don't blame yourself (or her).
Look at it this way, now you have a whole new sex life, finding out what really gets her going, what works best for her. You'll probably find new things you didn't know you liked before either. It's like starting the sexual relationship all over again, and it can be fun.
Don't beat yourself up over something like that, look at it as a new opportunity to grow and explore together.
>>16537801
The reason why a lot of them find it hard though is because the men don't take the time and stimulate them enough. They just think it's enough to stick it in but it doesn't work like that.
(Pic unrelated)
I'm in love for the first time in my life.
I'm in love with someone who has no time for a relationship. She's busy living life to the fullest, working three jobs (one of which we work together at), making new friends and finishing school. She likes to party as well, when she can.
I've known her for about a year. We've grown closer and become friends over the past 4 months or so. She's the only person I've ever opened myself up to completely. I fell for her sometime in september or october.
I honestly don't want to be a burden. To add to the heavy load she already has on her and I also don't want to risk the possibility of losing her as a friend but this is driving me mad. She's so alive, she makes me so happy. Her smile just absolutely melts my heart and I feel like a complete idiot around her.
Yesterday I had a nervous-brakedown because of the situation. I reached out to her (she's abroad for some conference) in panic and she helped me regain some control. When she asked why it happened I told her the truth, that I was in love, albeit not with whom.
I know I'm gonna be telling her soon.
But I'm so terrified...
>>16537616
You've already set for failure.
You've put her on the pedestal.
She'll crush you if you date her bro.
>>16537623
I've definitely considered that outcome, but honestly... She's different. She's always kind, understanding etc etc.... I've been through some flings before but she's just different y'know?
>>16537635
I'm not nearly as afraid of rejection as I am of losing her friendship
hey /adv/.
How do I know if I'm mentally ill?
>Since I remember myself I have always had a neutral like mood, I've never felt really happy but I do feel depressed very often
>I'm 21 and I have never had a gf(aside from midschool).
>most of the people I know say I act too indifferent
>I do have intersts in few hobbies but they don't do much aside from spending time or "bettering" myself.
>I'm lazy and still don't have clue what I want to do with my life.
>I often think about death, suicide, existational crisis.
recently someone I knew commited suicide, I didn't know her really well, not personally, but I still liked her and thought she is a good person, she looked happy enough, I would never guess she will take her own life. this triggered my depression once again, I know it's normal to feel this way in such situations, but I really didn't know her well enough, and now I'm obssesed with her death and keep thinking about her, trying to find out more about her and dwell too deep into this. I didn't cry when my grandma died, and now this girl, made me more depressed than ever, and I cried for the first time since a few years. If she did it, why would I not? she seemed much greater than me, she was too good to kill herself, a 19 years old girl, didn't even experience life yet, it's all I can think about, I don't want to do much else. what is my problem?
You're obviously depressed, I feel like that too. If you asked me when was the last time I felt happy I really couldn't answer. I feel like I've never been happy in my life, it's kinda weird. But yeah I don't really care anymore, I tried meditation and just focus on studying/bettering myself. Maybe someday I'll be happy Idk, but you don't have to be happy to live anyway.
Suicide has always been a stupid solution to problems imo. If you feel strongly about killing yourself then you should probably consult.
>>16537563
>How do I know if I'm mentally ill?
Do you post post on 4chan?
I've never met a single person who was completely normal that would want to have anything to do with this place. Think about it, this is a group of people with interests that involve everything from practicing obsolete weaponry to sexualizing cartoon horses. Anything except normal human interaction.
>>16537693
except I don't go to these places, I'm only looking for honest anonymous advice, and browse /fit/ or /tv/ for suggestions..
>>16537689
I'm considering getting professional help, I'm most like not a suicidal person, but I want to know where I stand, probably just a depressed, anxious person. which sucks because I really want to feel a rush of feelings like joy or even anger, I only got the down side of the feeling spectrum.
Ok, sorry for my bad english. But this really needs to be said. This GIRL ( pic on the left ) literally destroyed my life with the things she said behind my back. I hate her so so SO much, we used to be friends before and I knew her boyfriend (he is very rich) and his brother.
And I got all the attention suddently when I met her boyfriend, which made her go wild and crazy about it, she started to make her friends against me (she has got ALOT of friends, that are rich) and I get all the time hate like "Hahaha dont mess with amy, she told me what bitch you are etc"
Please, what can I do? I am crying all the time about the bad hate messages :( Can someone hack her instagram? I tried to talk to her but she is such a psycho and wants to destroy me and my life, just about the fact that she didnt get attention for once
Her instagram is instagram.com/itsamysday.
Are you an Arab?
>her friends
There's the reason that they're her friends and not yours, she's a jealous cunt. Jealousy can drive a person to make up things to dislike you.
Why not just block her?
Learn to not be a little drama loving faggot. Problem solved. I'm 100% serious.
I've really wanted to improve my writing and creative skills, but have no idea where to start. It's not because I want to BECOME a writer or join the industry; my skills are just very lackluster and I don't have the creativity to be able to write something interesting. I don't have any wit to speak of either, and that bugs me a lot. It's something I hope to remedy with some good writing skills. Where do I go to learn about the techniques that I should be aware of? Should I be reading more books?? On the topic of creativity, should I expose myself to a lot of different shit? Just go e-exploring for all kinds of things and find inspiration through that? What should I do??
Like, it took a good 20 minutes and frequent revisions to write the above paragraph and articulate myself properly, and even then it doesn't get my point across the way I thought it did. It's awful.
also pic possibly related
Bump. I'm going to bed now, so I'll read any replies in 6 hours or so.
1. Learn grammar.
2. Read a lot. (News, books) - Whatever
3. Analyze styles.
4. Write a lot while using perfect grammar.
Let your thoughts and imagination run wild and write down the ideas, no matter how crazy or stupid they may seem.
When you feel lost, listen to some music, watch a movie or play a video game or something for some inspiration.
My 18 year old girlfriend has had 7 sexual partners before me. I'm so bothered by it, but I don't want to be. It's like a lot but I still love her and I don't want this jealously to consume me.
What should I do?
You don't love her, stupid.
This is 100% unmarriageable territory. She will dump you at the slightest provocation to have her holes filled.
You are Number 8. NUMBER. EIGHT.
>>16537403
When did she start having sex? How many partners have you had? And how old is your relationship?
>>16537423
14
3 before
3 months
Australian born Asian fag here. Boyfriend is Australian, and VERY Australian. We've been dating for quite awhile, and we're both now seriously committed to the relationship.
Now that we're serious about it I invited him and my parents over to have dinner at mine. He was an absolute sweetheart and was very charming. Although there were communication issues (parents don't speak english, boyfriend doesn't speak chinese), he did his best and I think he made a good impression. However, my mum found a pack of cigarettes lying around the coffee table. My mum questioned whether or not they were mine. I don't smoke, they were my boyfriends. My parents immediately left and later that night they called me and told me they didn't approve of me dating a smoker let alone a white guy. I don't like him smoking either and I tell him that, but the final decision is his. I'm not going to force him to quit smoking down his throat.
How do I soothe the relationship between my boyfriend and my parents?
>>16537315
Omg that is very tough
I'm Chinese Australian too and I can understand why your parents are so unhappy
>>16537327
Anyway, adding to this, it helps if your bf has a job with a high income, wealthy parents, super large house, etc. If he does, tell your parents that.
LOL CHINKS
GO BACK TO CHINA
Srs tho
Fuck your parents, who gives a fuck?
I am also AUSTRALIAN M8
Yo I just spent about $140 ordering Japanese porn DVDs off Amazon and I'm drunk and young. Ask me for advice or questions and I'll give you answers.
Picture is Jeff Rosenstock
censored or uncensored?
>>16537296
Yeah I got a question, what mental disability do you suffer from that you would spend 140$ on something you can get for free in a vastly superior format?
>>16537296
What's the appeal in ordering physical copies of porn?
I wouldn't even go as far as to pay for porn online but I suppose someone has to.
So I recently found out that I have mice (again). I ended up looking through drawers in my kitchen and noticed that it shat, and likely pissed, near and on a bunch of my cooking utensils.
Does anybody know if it's safe to disinfect these things with a bleach solution or should I not even bother and just toss them in the garbage?
>>16537271
You do know that humans existed for millions of years before the invention of chlorine bleach, right?
You need to regularly expose yourself to bacteria, or your immune system will weaken, and you'll die. You are literally killing yourself with cleanliness.
I will never understand why some people think they are so different from the rest of the animals on earth, that the basic rules of nature don't apply to them.
>>16537322
I'd rather not eat food when I know something shit or pissed on it
Also I'd rather not eat food cooked with said utensils.
The last time this happened I early symptoms of hantavirus and I thought I was actually going to die. I'd rather not go through that again and just do this stuff if it's alright to do so.
Chef here.
Just wash them with dish liquid, using bleach on utensils is tricky and requires specific handling & aftercare... I dont feel like typing it so just use dish soap it will be fine.
>Do girls find the 'average' guy they see on the street attractive? or rate them more physically attractive on first sight?
I find most guys tend to be a bit more liberal with their choices, e.g average, cute or hot. but otherwise well esteemed.
I tested this with a group of my friends and the guys they echoed this, though the women weren't as forthcoming or gave vague answers (perhaps a bit shy)
I'm just wondering if girls are in the same in this regard, it was a point of discussion earlier today and I wanted /adv/'s take on it.
I think most guys are attractive enough, at the very least. Average and above, I mean, and there's nothing wrong with average. I see very few people, both male and female, who are truly unattractive
As a guy I judge literally every girl I see on if they are fuckable or if are too tall/fat/old/gross and I always figure out if their best feature is their face or ass or tits. Yes I'm kinda fucked up but that's just me
>>16537263
Literally everybody does that senpai
How can I not hate the fact I'm a kissless virgin so much? Mid 20's. Most of my childhood friends got laid in high school. New friends have a new hot tinder girl over every week or cutie gfs or the new girl from work, etc etc. As I'm typing this all three of my roommates each have a girl in their bed with them. Meanwhile, I made it through high school and college without even kissing a girl. Yes I'm ugly, no I'm not overweight, no I don't play video games or watch anime, yes I dress well, yes I've tried going to bars/clubs/parties/concerts/tinder/okcupid/pof.
Knowing I haven't gotten what I want more than anything (validation/attention from girls/sex) seriously eats at me every day. Thinking about ask the experiences I've forever missed out on (young love, sex with a virgin, teen dating, prom, college hookups, ONS's after college house parties, fwb, etc etc, ad nauseum.) I usually don't even leave the apartment anymore except for work and to buy groceries, and only leave my bedroom to use the bathroom or fix food. I can't even fake happy anymore. I'm depressed every hour of every day. How can I deal with all this bullshit in my head?
Jesus Christ, go to a bar or get a hooker and stop being such a whiny bitch. Life isn't going to come to you, you have to fucking go out and get it.
>How can I not hate the fact I'm a kissless virgin so much?
By not giving a fuck
>>16537225
Read the post I've tried bars plenty of times
I was at my bf's the other night and at one stage when he left the room, I thought I heard/felt his phone go off. So, naturally, I went to check it for him, only to see that he has tinder AND grindr downloaded.
I have no doubt that he uses both of them, and probably frequently too, but I've no idea how to bring it up with him.
Honestly, I'm pretty scared, but I don't think he's actually slept with anyone else. I'm not sure if I think that because I'm wearing rose colored glasses, or because I still have a little amount of trust in him.
What do /adv/? Should I confront him about this, and if so, how? Pls help
>>16537196
Grow a pair and fucking ask him.
Ask him.
Tell him you're worried/disappointed.
I have tinder and I'm in a relationship. I don't speak to anyone on there, I just wanted to see what the fuss was about. Maybe it's innocent?
>>16537196
>So, naturally, I went to check it for him,
Oh, wow, that's so kind of you - you fucking cunt.
I've snooped on my gf's before but I never do it unless I think something is up already and/or I'm ready to end the relationship. It's a very disrespectful thing to do that you, as a woman, can only be retarded to actually think you are doing a service for your boyfriend. Like he can't fucking check his phone - a two fucking second process - when he comes back.
Quit being a disingenuous cunt and admit you wanted to snoop. You saw a moment to look through someone elses private matters, and took advantage of it. Don';t get me wrong, in my opinion, he is in the wrong too, but you've lowered yourself to his level, if not further, because you willingly abused his trust and went through his own possessions - that's a fact. I don't know what he was doing with dating apps, but unless there is proof he was cheating emotionally or physically, then I'd say your the shitty one in this situation. Keep your fucking hands off other peoples things. He didn't ask you to check it. Is something he has EVER asked you to do? Did you ASK him before checking it? No. You little rat. You should be ashamed of yourself. This stress you feel now is all your own fault. Don't go through other peoples shit unless you are ready for the relationship to drastically change, or end. Complete violation of trust. There can easily be more private information in a persons phone than their diary/journal. Would you 'check' someones diary or journal? Normal people wouldn't because that's a CUNT thing to do.
I apologise for everything, though I know you won't forgive me. I am sorry.
Dear family,
I wish I wasn't such a disappointment, but I also don't want to have those backwards ideas some of you have. And freedom, too, to be honest.
I was an idiot. I said I didn't feel anything, but I lied. I still love you, even now, you're married and may have a baby on the way. It kills me inside, because I knew you still loved me, too. I was just afraid to make that commitment, and now I'll never find another like you. You were always my only love, K.
R.
I loved you more than I ever loved anyone and yet you took my heart and smashed it into a million pieces. You made me feel like life mattered, like I mattered... like you wouldn't leave me behind... like you would help me and not just use me like you did... I hate you and yet I love you and would do anything for you... to just see your face and hear your voice once again... or even to feel your warm embrace.. your heart beating... not that I could bare to be romantically involved with you... I could never trust you with me heart again... as if it could bare to open itself to you again... but just to pretend for a moment as though what happened didn't happen... and pretend as though we were dumb kids again... just loving each other and being friends. I miss that part. Just being together and loving each other... as friends.... as partners... as those who look out for each other... not this. I never wanted this. this is cruel. this is..........gut wrenching... for lack of a better word.... this tears me to my core THIS... whatever THIS is. I know what it's NOT and it's nothing that I had before and I want to know how you worked such magic to make me believe in the beauty of love and how you could be so cruel as to take it all away..... why is life so cruel, I'd like to know... why does it take my dreams away? Why didn't you chase away my monsters like you promised? you only made them bigger. And you're the worst one of all. Who will protect me against you? What am I supposed to do without you? you were everything to me and now you're nothing except a faint memory and a shadow that haunts me daily. the memories of a better me and now I'm left with this husk of a person, hollow on the inside, drained of all my love and energy for your cruel satisfaction. Why would you do this to someone? how could you? I just don't understand how I could have been so blinded by you. You scoundrel.
How do you get a gf. Seriously.
Idk if I'm too ugly or not. I don't know what I'm doing wrong
Please /adv/ I'm getting too old for this, being lonely isn't enjoyable anymore
>>16537014
Sauce?
http://www.wikihow.com/Get-a-Girlfriend
>>16537014
I want to help, but I really can't get an idea of how ugly you are, or if you are even ugly if you don't post an image of your face.
But to get a girlfriend you need to work hard, perfect your look as much as possible, that means washing your face 2 times a day, don't smell, etc. Ensure your home in clean and is welcoming to females. Hang around girls, and if your too scared to approach them, one will approach you, eventually.