Anonymous
How do I salvage my SO FWB? 2015-12-27 19:56:43 Post No.16609934
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How do I salvage my SO FWB? 2015-12-27 19:56:43 Post No.16609934
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How do I salvage my SO FWB?
Anonymous
2015-12-27 19:56:43
Post No. 16609934
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Posted about this girl visiting my parents behind my back and leaving a x-mas stocking for me a few days ago.
Been having sex for more than 5 years, during which time we've been officially gf/bf, had LDRs several times, been living together, been cheated on, been broken up and no contact at least five times, been open relationship, kept our relationship a secret due to family issues, and been FWB, the stage we're at now.
It's been more than three weeks since I last saw her, and five weeks since we had sex. After she came back from a trip, she said she didn't have time to see me before x-mas, and didn't want to commit to anything when I suggested she should stay over before New Years. I fucked another girl that evening, so this isn't some blueballs thread. And nobody's asking for exclusivity, so don't consider this cheating. I'm pretty sure she fucked someone else during her trip, as she's very sexual and most people find her gorgeous. She always gets a bit distant whenever she's been with someone else, which is annoying as hell. I think maybe that's why she didn't want to see me.
She wrote me today, asking how my x-mas was. Said she might be going out and will text me if that's the case. I asked her if she wants us to be on the same page, and told her how I felt about her being so unpersonal and distant. She asked if it was because she didn't want to sleep over, and I said that, and how she went and saw my parents instead of me before x-mas. She said she thought she was doing something nice, and I said "I know, but it just made me mad. No worries now, but it only created more distance between us. You tell me you love me and send me hearts, but you're flaky and don't want to meet me. You don't want to be seen with me, but you're sitting in my parents' livingroom for one and a half hour instead of meeting up with me. It's weird, sad and cognitively dissonant. Nice thing to do, but also just wrong."
>She: Seriously??
>Me: Are you asking from kindness?
>No answer.
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you roll in the mud you're gonna get dirty
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>>16609945
How is this advice? I know you wouldn't do what I do, but it's my personality disorder, and I do as I please.
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>>16609977
You're the one who engaged in a FWB for more than 5 years. Seriously, dude? What the fuck did you expect to happen?
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I desperatly need to do my laundry today. However, the machine in my apartment only takes quarters. I don't have any quarters.
Where can I go to get quarters in bulk? The banks are closed today so that's not an option. What can I do?
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Any department store or grocery store. Just go to the service counter and ask if they can give you rolls of quarters. Did this all the time at the grocery store I worked.
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there is a change machine at the laundromat. some vending machines that take bills give you change in quarters when you hit the button to get your money back.
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>>16609941
>>16609941
but can i use a debit caard to get it? or do i need to buy something
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My grandmother is 85 and has been really sad lately as many of her friends have been dying lately. What can I say to her to console her when I cannot truly empathize?
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>>16609929
Just spend time with her. You're the one person she loves who won't die (well, barring bizarre circumstances). Offer to do stuff with her, like go to lunch or a movie or just hang out. Help fill the void left by her friends.
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threaten to have her put down
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Just be there to listen, talk to her and include her in your life. Old people like that. Invite her out for like coffee or lunch if you really want to make her day.
19 yo Male NEET in good health but have depression. I have been making some serious improvements lately and feel like my life is doing a 180, but I have a problem I can't wrap my head around. I get this uneasiness around twilight that ruins my ability to concentrate or enjoy anything. A wave of confusion comes over me, sometimes pending on the severity images I cannot control flash in my head, and these images can be quite morbid. I have a way of dealing with it most of the time, I try taking a nap 10-20 min before civil twilight and try waking up a couple minutes after nightfall proper. But I still don't understand why it happens and I have been searching for 2+ years. Does anyone have a theory or can relate to this?
tl;dr twilight screws with my head on my most days makes me confused lethargic and sometimes see images in head, usually I can break through it come nightfall, but I have fuck all for why it happens.
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I research psych in free time so not certified but may be able to contribute
If i had to say so myself id say around twilight your hormones that regulate sleep (cortisol wakes you up and melatonin puts you down) are shifting and affecting your serotonin (neurochemical that keeps your mind sound and calm in positive way)
To fix it, youd have to change your cortisol levels by exercising a few hours before twilight or you can take serotonin pills that raise your serotonin
Of course, see a doc before you listen to anyone here but still the stuff i suggested cant harm you.
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to not be a total fag, i meant psych and neurology
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>>16609999
>>16610002
Thank you very much for the advice.
Call me superstitious but I have always had a phobia of meds, pills specifically. I'll try out exercise. Dusk is in an hour or so, I will try it right now.
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My girlfriend is from a rich family and it makes me really insecure.
I'm starting a great career but being around them makes me feel like I'm still that kid with gaping holes in his shoes and no heat.
Are these feelings normal?
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Is the discrepancy really that noticeable or something? I can get that you would be a bit insecure, but why does it bother you that much?
Is she or any of her family members condescending in any way?
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>>16609961
I never show my negative emotions
Her family is nice, but her dad seems like he sees me as a wandering dog
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You aren't alone OP,pretty much all of my girlfriends have been from wealthier families than me,and yeah,sometimes you'll get those feelings,but asnlong as they don't hold I over your head and act respectable,then it's something that should come to pass. Money isn't everything.
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Any of you had a cyst from ingrown hair in pubic area? How to get rid of it?
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Wait until it's large-ish enough and make a little cut. A LITTLE cut.
Then remove the ingrown hair, rub some alcohol and you're done.
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>>16609902
I have it since like a year, it is kinda big, i didnt care because i was a fat fuck with no perspectives of getting laid. I also dont know the exact location of the hair. Should i aim to the middle?
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>>16609912
How do you know it's a cyst and not a boil caused by your poor diet?
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Should I hit on my friend's roommate?
A couple weeks ago, I hooked up with a girl I had previously had an affair with. We were talking pretty much everyday until I found out that she was still with her longtime boyfriend.
I'm going to her apartment this week to bake blackberry cobbler, and am wondering if it'd be prudent to slightly hit on her roommate.
The roommate studies film. I'm an editor. Maybe it's not such a bad move. Is it mean?
This is a whole lot.
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Why not? Why should you care what your friend thinks? She cheated on her boyfriend with you, she doesn't really get to judge the way you conduct your own love life
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If you value your friendship you should ask her first if it's ok.
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>>16609859
Look, unless you're pursuing anything inherently romantic, who cares who you flirt with or Fuck. Do what you want.
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So here's the thing, I was hanging out with this 18yo girl for 5 months, it's was really nice, but it turned into a kind of "Tom &Jerry relationship" when a gay friend of ours suddenly became interested in her (bizarre, ikr). And now she's fuckin' enchanted by him ( even though sometimes we still kiss/make out) . What should I do ? Should I let them be ? I really like this girl, but It's so messed up...
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you should become gay to balance the situation
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Attraction is complicated. Enjoy the parts of the relationship you can enjoy for now (makeouts I guess) but don't let it stop you from looking elsewhere.
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I don't think so mate...
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Been over 2 months since I talked to her. We both liked each other but I took to long to make a move and also embarrased myself by drunk dialling.
Should I try and reconnect with her?
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For real, no replies
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Why not? I'd do it before too much time passes and it gets weird. Play off any awkwardness and just be cool about it.
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>>16609843
Tell us about the drunk dialing.
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I need help when it comes to girls being attracted to me. What should you do if you know for a fact that a girl is flirting or may be attracted to you?
It seems like some girls find me attractive but I always fuck it up by being oblivious or acting scared/nervous. This is a reoccurring problem that I have. I'm referring to girls that I don't know personally. Girls who are only attracted to my appearance because I am semi fit.
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Ask her if she wants to go do something.
See a movie, walk around the park, play video games, visit the animal shelter, whatever.
This will buy you time together to stop acting nervous.
What's your end game? Do you want to make out or get a girlfriend or just stop having nerves or what?
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>>16609829
The the end goal is a girlfriend. I don't enjoy sex with condoms very much so one night stands don't appeal to me. and I would rather not catch a venereal disease from making out with random girls.
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>>16609878
Even if you have a girlfriend that doesn't mean you can stop using a condom.
Is this how people think? Really?
No wonder there is so much teen pregnancy.
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Hi,
My girlfriend has feelings for another guy but she still loves me...
We've been crying our souls out to eachother for a couple of days now...I love her with all my soul and don't want to break up with her...She says she could not cheat on me because I am the greatest thing that happened to her...I really need some help...What should I do? Pic unrelated...
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she's just afraid of being alone, that's why she says she still loves you
deep down she wants the other guy, she just haven't moved on because she doesn't think it's safe to do it right now
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This
>>16609825
The relationship is over.
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Seperate for now. A couple days. Tell her it's hard to be with her when she has feeling for someone else.
She will either
A.) miss you the whole time and come back
B.) go sleep with the other guy and stay with him
C.) go sleep with the other guy and get cum'd & dump'd, then come crying back to you
A is acceptable. B is unfortunate for you but also okay. C is the most fucked up and will lead to 2-4 years of hot tears and arguments about it before you both get over it (if you want her back and can still stand each other's company.)
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I'm about to turn 22.
How do I stop feeling like I'm too old and that my life should have ended by now?
I never made plans past this point. I never thought I'd make it this far. I always figured I'd man up and kill myself before I reach 21.
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Realize you still have an infinite number of things you could possibly do with the rest of your life. There is so much to do and experience I don't know why anyone would want to kill themselves when that is the death of potential.
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>>16609805
Like what?
I'm too old to start anything.
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>>16609811
Like anything you want. Are you dumb?
Anonymous
I have been alpha widowed 2015-12-27 18:47:34 Post No.16609787
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I have been alpha widowed 2015-12-27 18:47:34 Post No.16609787
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I have been alpha widowed
Anonymous
2015-12-27 18:47:34
Post No. 16609787
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How do you guys get over someone that literally saved you from a doomed existence? I know these kind of stories have been endlessly asked here but I just...can't. I am aware that there are plenty of fish in the sea but she was my type of woman: mature, a bit shy/reserved, beautiful but not amazing (7-8/10), has great values, good job, no tattoos or piercings...
I am a 22 y/o male and I was really into a 27 y/o female. 2 years ago I started going to a track and field club in order to change myself (boderline NEET, no friends, no female interaction...). At first, I just wanted to train but eventually grew closer to this girl and she asked me what do I do in life? I froze for a second and she said I look like a firefighter and this is where she gave me purpose.
Since I met her, everything about me changed:
>accepted into the firefighter academy
>new haircut
>new clothes
>less shy than before
>bought my dream car
>started to read the redpill
I have tried to make things work with her but I was friendzoned long ago. I made a move on her in August and said she views me as a 2nd degree friend that I was funny, smart and kind but she just can't open herself about other subjects. She is sorry that she induced me in error and says that the reason I always felt like a stranger to her is that she still has her heart broken by her previous relationship (she is literally the definition of alpha widow) and she tries to forget about it. I tried to talk to her like nothing happened a month later but her responses were short and dry. It has been 2 months since I have talked to her and I don't think she will ever re-initiates the conversation.
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>>16609787
I looked up what her ex looked like and I get it now:
>guy is tall
>co-founder of a big bicycle start up in my city (that also explains this girl's love for bicycles)
>lives in a upper middle class apartment (she always told me she sought independence...)
>seems to have a lot of friends and pretty popular
I never stood a chance against him. But in someway, I owe everything I have achieved because of her...and I can't let her go. I want to reconnect with her but I don't think there is a way. I am already abysmal with women and even though I have tremendously improved, it's still not enough.
What do now?
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>>16609790
shes out of your league bud. leave her be, pursing her longer is just creepy. treasure the memories you have of her and be grateful for those. you dont need any more than that
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>>16609809
actually, let me rephrase. you dont deserve more than that. any fgt that uses the term "alpha widow" unironically is pretty much a giant douche.
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Alright So recently I've kinda found out what mortality is ( I knew what it is, But it's coming into perspective) and how I could die at any moment. So Obviously I want to stay alive, but also have fun with my life and take risks, Is there any way I can mic the two together?
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>>16609738
The two are already entwined. Logic is whether you do it or not. Is up to you.
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>>16609738
start doing more shit that brings you joy and happiness. stop doing shit that is pointless drudgery that makes you miserable.
take risks.
network.
be active.
be present in the NOW.
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If you could die at anytime the only logical way to live your life is to make the absolute most of it that you can. It might be our only chance to live, so to live it paralyzed by inaction is a waste of all the possibilities.
How do you make your facial expression look less sad and grim. My natural resting face always looks depressed. Is there anyway to change that? I try to smile sometimes but it feels so uncomfortable.
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>>16609723
because you aren't used to it.
do it more.
google some "emotional intelligence face tests" and see for yourself
http://socialintelligence.labinthewild.org/mite/ (you dont have to put anything in, just keep clicking next)