Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 6534. page

>>16611106
You sound like a cunt, so they probably hate you just as much.

>>16611106
MOVE.

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>>16611106

>>16611095
Literally no way
Id recommend you hire a private detective.

Documentation, Evidence, and a sweet ass lawyer. (I have no experience with this, so don't trust my opinion too much)

Evidence, evidence, evidence

Take pics of her doing drugs and document the hospital visits

Any /lawfags/ got anything?

>>16611093
>everyone else in the world knows it as well and we're all just finding ways to create our own meaning and happiness.

yes, you are all deluding yourselves

literally

he obviously cant do that. i sometimes can, and i sometimes cant. when i cant i am utterly depressed about how pointless everything is and how selfish and cunty most people are.

just be nice to him and invite him out to do cool things. you cant change his mind.

>>16611093
>He's heavily depressed and is on medication and expects everyone but himself to make him not depressed.
The sad thing about depression is, in my experience, this is how it works, and he CAN'T do anything about it himself. If he could, he would have already. No one wants to be depressed.

I understand why people don't want to help someone make themselves happy, but telling someone who's depressed "No one can help you but yourself" is like telling someone who's bleeding out the same thing.

He might be a elitist faggot, but depression isn't something that most people can deal with on their own. If it was, it wouldn't be so common.

I should also add when I've suggested that he should maybe speak to a psychologist his response was "I went to one when I was younger but psychologists insult my intelligence and try to make me feel stupid" which I was at a loss for words with because speaking about and navigating your mental and emotional state isn't an intellectual competition and psychologists are primarily there to help imo.

I come from a different mental place with a bit of a background in social psychology and intra-gender communications....so the emotional element doesn't come into play with my assessments. I left my Disney relationship card at the door. Be warned.

What you're describing is a situation where you're attempting to re-initiate a relationship with someone who has since moved on. The idea of her open relationship assists this by allowing you a glimmer of hope.

For a moment - place yourself in a position where she's already told you "no" to the impending question. Are you still friends with her in the fallout? Many of my HS friends and I had this weird "come to Jesus" moment where we realized our past was the only commonality we had outside their desire for attention and my desire to open vag, insert penis. When it was cleared that their interest didn't exist in carnal affairs, my communication frequency dissipated if not outright disappeared. If you no longer desire to be her friend - you now know why you two still speak - you're sexually interested in her - be it for familiarity or plausible desire.

In the next moment - Let's say she said "Sure! I'd love to play "P in V" with you within my weird style of polygamous relationship" What do you want to get out of this? Is this likely to be in-line with her goals, given she's allowing for this poly-type relationship to exist? Or is this just sex for her? If you're looking to do more than get your dick wet, and she's not - are you helping or hurting the situation?


When you come up with answers only you can provide (from your perspective), decide whether or not just to pop the question. Every question left unasked results in an implied "no". Every question asked can result in damaged relationship, voided friendship, and a perpetual state of weird existing between 2 parties.

Play carefully OP. Figure out what you want, and see if that lines up with what you're looking for.

>>16611255
I've been very careful with talking to her about all of this for the reason that I was unsure about how my feelings were. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with her for sex, but then again I wouldn't just want a one night stand. I care about her as a person and I know she cares about me, but I'm strictly a monogamous guy. I wouldn't be into the polygamous relationship scene because I don't believe they can work, at least not for me.

The thing I'm trying to come to terms with is the fact that I would have no idea what to do if she said yes/no and I'm obviously worried our friendship will be put on the line. I don't want to make her the only thing on my mind because I don't want to be stuck on the idea we could have a potential future, but I can't seem to get this feeling I have around her with anyone else.

Another thing that worries me is that she never makes her intentions clear. When we got together way back when, she came to me almost unexpectedly, and when she came to me to end it, we had just watched a movie and had what seemed to be a great time, like any other time we have, so I can't seem to read into her emotions, and that worries me to some degree.

>I care about her as a person and I know she cares about me, but I'm strictly a monogamous guy. I wouldn't be into the polygamous relationship scene because I don't believe they can work, at least not for me.

Then you have your answer in regard to her and monogamy. She's in a relationship with another guy.

>The thing I'm trying to come to terms with is the fact that I would have no idea what to do if she said yes/no and I'm obviously worried our friendship will be put on the line. I don't want to make her the only thing on my mind because I don't want to be stuck on the idea we could have a potential future, but I can't seem to get this feeling I have around her with anyone else.

Is what you have, in fact, a friendship - or a personal interest in a relationship with a girl you've already put your penis in? Do you have commonality existing outside of memories and moments? Do you share interests and enjoy experiencing mutual interests while sharing time? Do you have the prior - or is it only a fragment of a memory because you don't spend time together like you did while dating? Or - is this just an infatuation you hold for one girl, disallowing you from feeling connected to anyone else despite her situation? You have those answers - you just need figure that out.

>Another thing that worries me is that she never makes her intentions clear. When we got together way back when, she came to me almost unexpectedly, and when she came to me to end it, we had just watched a movie and had what seemed to be a great time, like any other time we have, so I can't seem to read into her emotions, and that worries me to some degree.

Ask questions to get answers you want - But only verbalize these questions to others if you're sure you want answers.

This doesn't sound like a good place to be. I understand where you're coming from and why you feel funny inside, but this seems like you're setting yourself up for disappointment. Cut contact. Watch, but don't wait.

Be interesting.

I'm in the same boat as you, Went on my second date in my life a few weeks ago. We were able to take for several hours because we shared common interests.

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>>16611058
OP is pic related you?

>>16611058
Don't put all of your eggs in one basket. Girls talk and date multiple men at once a lot of times. You should do the same and then pick the most attractive girl you have. It's that simple. If you fail with a chick just brush it off and move onto the next because 99% of the women on dating apps are worthless so you don't lose anything if they reject you. You honestly have nothing to lose. Keep trying op, you'll get the hang of it.

A lot of sluts like when you make jokes about your dick so you could always try that.

Wasn't sure what board to post this in. Just trying to get my feelings out...

I'm estranged from my dad too, and I'm 99% certain we'll never speak or see each other again. I know I will feel this feel one day. Don't live in regret though, that shit will eat you alive. Life can be really confusing and hard sometimes. But sometimes you just gotta say "shit happens" and move on.

>>16611633

Thanks for the advice and for replying at all. I was starting to think nobody cared.

>>16611024
It's forever

>>16611026
:-(

how do I overcome the guilt
bump

>>16610953
From experience-just revise the facts. Literally-thats the only shit you need for the marks, so when the teacher is telling you about how to make good filler in the essays, your time will be better spent playing video games. Legitimately aquire a basic mark scheme and revise the facts only. If it sounds like bs dont revise it. For example, learning Hitlers point of view on the Jews during WW2 will get you fuck all marks. Learning why this happened, (deeply ingrained hatred, as the jewish people often held the highest/ best payed jobs in pre war Germany, causing jelousy)- thats where you get your marks. Essay structure doesnt need to be that good either, as long as its relatively fluid you will get full marks.
Main point im trying to say is learn the facts alone. If your teacher is shit, do it yourself and when you get your grades write an anoymous complaint to the college to fuck them over. You decide how bad the complaint is

>>16610953
>Advice on how to pass the class?
>high school

Cheat? It's just high school, it doesn't really matter.

>>16611044
That's good advice thx.

>>16610930
Well at least you didn't pour your heart out for a girl who then openly stated she was using you for entertainment/confidence/support AND who said she hopes you're an asshole who should feel bad after saying you cannot continue to talk to her.

Fuck her.

I came so close to letting the hate win out and just going off the rails completely.

Just be thankful she wasn't a selfish cunt about it. God fucking damn.

>>16610958
Forgot to delete 'she hopes'.

You get the idea.

But, OP, what I did was focus on my self. I started going to the gym 4 times a week, reading a lot more, making more music, and developing a healthy, solid relationship with myself. Sorting through a lot of horrible thoughts and changing how I relate to myself, and in what context.

You can move on and you will move on. This terrible fucking pain is going to force you to grow and become more independent. It will also make the good things in life better by comparison.

get into music bruh

>>16610929
Find a list of the great works of literature in the western cannon. find something that looks like it could be pertinent to your sensibility and situation. READ IT. THINK ABOUT IT. MOVE ON TO THE NEXT BOOK.

Although I do not know you personally I would suggest that you might want to start the books that have IDENTITY as one of it's central themes.

also... Anon is right.. listen to some good music also.

Find a happy place. I get very depressed and have similar thoughts, and honestly the only thing that takes my mind off my thoughts are the time wasting distractions.

For me, videos of river otters calm my thinking and makes me feel happy. I don't know why, I just really like these little guys and seeing them play makes me smile and forget my depression for a while, every single time.

I don't know if you have something similar, but it might help.

Wish I could give you more long term advice, but I don't know of any.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLVf8lWISqE

I went to prison and when I got out I felt like I had nothing. unmotivated, etc. but I needed money so i became a laborer... i fix shit.. clean shit... move shit.. etc.. nigger work.

then i use the money to buy booze and drugs. been like this for a year and a half now. money is the motivation i guess, just keep working

I wish i could help but im in the same boat, im going to study to be a lawyer and its more a "itd the thing I dislike less" than a "my dream is to be a lawyer!"

>>16611295
Funny enough I spent my whole undergrad studying law, hated the tedium but it's what everyone swears I'll be good at.

>>16610872
What does the e stand for?

>>16610904
enema

Have you ever pissed in the kitchen sink or taken a shit in a saucepan?

>>16610871
No.

>>16610858

SHORT VERSION

>Would increasing my testosterone levels to 900-1000ng/dl from my current 432ng/dl cure/ease my depression?
>Would it make my fat distribution normal? (like a man instead of a woman)

Dates aren't useless. You're not that special, there's a reason that pretty much everyone does things a certain way. Stop being so blunt and start actually trying to show them a good time

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If you are shallow, you could at least be fun. You sound like a drag.

>>16610851
"buy and hold close" = "talk to and hold close"..
Dunno what happened there

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Take the actuarial exam.

You don't necessarily need a master's, but you should consider adding a minor in some field that you believe you could apply the math degree to. Math is funny, in that you can apply it to lots of different fields; you just need some sense of what you want to do with it.